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This Twitter Page Documents Only The Most Savage Yet Also Clever Comebacks, And Here’re 30 Of The Best Ones
Crafting a snappy and witty comeback that’ll grab everyone’s attention is no easy feat. However, all that effort and comedic instinct are worth it—if it’s on the internet, it might just live on in the digital hall of fame in screenshot form. Who knows, you might see peeps sharing your comeback for years and years. Ego boost? Yes, please!
One place where these legendary testaments to people’s wit are documented is the ‘Clever Comebacks’ page on Twitter. Having been founded just a few short months ago, in February, it’s grown to have nearly 67k followers since then.
We’ve collected the crème de la crème of clever comebacks for you to enjoy, dear Pandas, so go on and have a look at them below. Hopefully, some of these will inspire you to greatness the next time you need a snappy one-liner. Don’t forget to upvote the ones you enjoyed the most and let us know what the very best comeback you’ve ever said or written was in the comments.
I reached out to British musical stand-up comedian and comedy writer Ariane Sherine to talk to her about comebacks, the role that courage plays in comedy, and how we can overcome our fear of being judged whether on-stage or on-screen. Have a read below for Bored Panda's interview with the humor expert.
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"Courage is hugely important," British comedian Ariane told Bored Panda about its role in comedy. "The more courageous you are, the more you'll shed your inhibitions and the greater the chance that you'll say something shocking and funny."
According to the comedy expert, the element of surprise is "essential" to comedy. And more often than not, "there's an edge or a hint of cruelty" in most jokes and comebacks. "If you're timid and careful, then you're probably not going to want to offend people with comebacks and will be polite rather than witty," she said.
The anonymity that the internet and social media provide can be a double edged sword: it can help people feel freer because they'll take criticism less personally, but it can also empower bullies to spew hatred. Comedian Ariane agreed that anonymity is a tool and everything depends on how we use it.
"We feel freer to say things we wouldn't say in real life, but that also means we're more likely to be hurtful. I think the same is true of being on stage for comics—when we're holding the mic we feel free to dispense with niceties," she gave us her take on the relationship between anonymity, honesty, and comedy.
In reply to "Something" - Umm, prepare to have your mind blown: you can eat more than one slice of cake.
Bored Panda was also intrigued to find out how best not to freeze up when you're going on-stage as a comedian or if we're paralized for fear of being rejected before posting a joke or a witty comeback. "Alcohol! Only joking. I guess it's to remember that fear of rejection never got anyone anywhere," Ariane quipped and then pointed out that we have to focus on what our end goals really are. "All the comics you admire have overcome fear of rejection. So do you want to make people laugh or not?"
Comebacks, from cool and clever to lame and drab, are nothing new to us. Previously, I’d also spoken with comedian Ariane about the art of the comeback, as she's an insider in the world of comedy, timing, and shutting down hecklers.
Speed, according to Ariane, is where the essence of comebacks lies. Without it, our attempts at humor can fall flat. “I think the most important thing with comebacks is speed. Even if the joke isn't a total zinger, people will be impressed by your quickfire response," she told Bored Panda in an earlier interview.
Put "decent people" instead of women. It still works, but it is more accurate and inclusive.
However, unlike us mere mortals, most stand-up comics actually come prepared. They’ve got an entire repertoire of comebacks at the ready, just in case they need to shut down a heckler or fire off a rapid put-down or two. What’s more, comedians tend to share these comebacks with one another.
“We're not all as fast and talented as it seems! But if we're doing stand-up, our own routines will be original—it's just heckle putdowns that might not be," Ariane gave us an insight into the giggle industry.
Ariane highlighted the fact that you grow your emotional resilience with experience as a comedian. Over time, you get better at delivering comebacks and how quickly you can do so. “You don't want to give them the chance to reject you—you've got to get in there first with a funny insult!" she said about the dynamic between the performer and the audience if the latter’s feeling a tad cheeky and wants to have a go at ruining the show.
I hate how you can’t comment on people down arrowed. Anyway, to the sexist guys who only seem to care about embryos not actual living babies “no uterus, no opinion”
They found men who wore a mask were better than those who didn't because no woman wants to go near someone with a high risk of carrying COVID-19
If you feel like you’re not up to snuff, you really should draw on others for inspiration when it comes to good comedy. Whether it’s reading through tons of screenshots of clever comebacks that you find on the net or watching reruns of your favorite comedians (both are great).
However, British comedy pro Ariane pointed out that you shouldn’t be stealing original stand-up material for your own shows. It’s fine if you’re doing it to impress your friends, but there’s a certain code of honor that pops up when you start earning money for your jokes.
Here's a radical thought: maybe being concerned for the greater good is beneficial for the individual. We live in a society, not in isolated cells.
Ariane told Bored Panda something that most people know but few voice aloud: it’s very clear to everybody when a comeback is good and when it’s so bad, you’ll be remembering it and cringing for years. We instinctively know what’s quality and what’s best left on the dusty lower shelf in the joke store.
He could have also used $30 million to built houses to fight homelessness.
“It needs to be very fast, well-timed, and take people by surprise as well as being clever, witty, and immediately understandable,” the stand-up comedian listed all the things that a comeback needs in order to grab our attention and make us laugh.
We all saw a video of trumps "peaceful protesters" that was released yesterday, showing them trying to murder a different cup and Brian Sicknick on January 6. I am truly disgusted.
They're also trying to rewrite what happened as nothing more serious than a "tour" of the building
Load More Replies...What does support vilification is Trump supporter lying about what happened or defending it. They blame Antifa or BLM (nope - it was all Trump supporters). They say it was just a "peaceful protest" (nope -they assaulted a whole lot of people and violently entered the Capitol then proceeded to loot and deface it.) Some of them are now claiming it didn't even happen. If you can't hold your own accountable then you deserve to be vilified.
Am I the only one who is really bored of all of America's problems? There's always some faction kicking off about something and it just goes round and round and round. Please, America, just get your sh!t together. There are third world countries who behave better and if the roles were reversed you would be telling them exactly where they were going wrong.
Was it this Millie Weaver? https://www.news5cleveland.com/news/local-news/infowars-correspondent-millie-weaver-arrested-on-robbery-tampering-with-evidence-charges-in-portage-county
If a lot of people from a group act evil it's reasonable to assume that the group is the problem. Goes for Neo-liberals, Right wingers and religions alike. My 2¢
I would agree but it isn’t the same across the board. Like say if one group of people all believe something incorrect and some act evil, they’re still all trash for supporting the wrong idea to begin with. If another group of people believe something correct, and some act evil, it’s just the few evil actors who are in the wrong and not the whole group.
Load More Replies...LOL " even if you're going to use the one-sided reporting as your basis." is quite funny coming from someone who relies on Breitbart and Infowars to get their racist and fascist prejudices confirmed. It's also nice that you write "a great many Republicans are "disgusted" as well..." indicating that none of the Republicans are disgusted by anything that happened. We all know that a lot of them publicly supported the storming of the capitol.
Load More Replies...You can slam the anti-vaxxers with logic, facts and figures all you want. It's just as useless as telling toddler Trump and his followers that he lost the elections fair and square.
What?! You cut off the comeback! https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/5c79n0/you_can_have_sex_with_one_real_person_from_all_of/d9uf56l/?context=1
I like all lil nas songs even montero but those shoes bro...who ever gave him the idea?
I am grateful that BP reposts from Twitter, Tumblr and Reddit, because I don't spend time on those apps.
All I gotta say is that there are a lot of trolls on the internet and the best way to deal with them is to not give them any attention at all ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
But it's more fun of you do give them attention
Load More Replies...Ok so me and my sis were on the bus yesterday and some dumbass boys were hung annoying. So anyways one of them tells her "I bet your dad spends more money on milk than you!" And she just ignored him and he said "Aww, are you gonna cry?" And she whips around with the biggest smile and says "At least my dad came home with the milk" IT WAS THE BEST COMEBACK EVER
Ok so the point of the original joke the boys were trying to make was following the story of like a dad going to get milk and never coming back, just their own dumb version of it
Load More Replies...Ok, funny article, but does anyone else find when they click the upvote button they get a pop up to another website? it's super annoying.
Use uBlock origin as an addon in your browserand you won't get ad popups.
Load More Replies...This is just a forum for one guys posts. Don't veil it, just call it "an account i like"
I found this gem... probably no one looks down here but i thought it was a good comment >:D Screen-Sho...01-png.jpg
I'm on 240% magnification, and I still can't see that.
Load More Replies...I am grateful that BP reposts from Twitter, Tumblr and Reddit, because I don't spend time on those apps.
All I gotta say is that there are a lot of trolls on the internet and the best way to deal with them is to not give them any attention at all ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
But it's more fun of you do give them attention
Load More Replies...Ok so me and my sis were on the bus yesterday and some dumbass boys were hung annoying. So anyways one of them tells her "I bet your dad spends more money on milk than you!" And she just ignored him and he said "Aww, are you gonna cry?" And she whips around with the biggest smile and says "At least my dad came home with the milk" IT WAS THE BEST COMEBACK EVER
Ok so the point of the original joke the boys were trying to make was following the story of like a dad going to get milk and never coming back, just their own dumb version of it
Load More Replies...Ok, funny article, but does anyone else find when they click the upvote button they get a pop up to another website? it's super annoying.
Use uBlock origin as an addon in your browserand you won't get ad popups.
Load More Replies...This is just a forum for one guys posts. Don't veil it, just call it "an account i like"
I found this gem... probably no one looks down here but i thought it was a good comment >:D Screen-Sho...01-png.jpg
I'm on 240% magnification, and I still can't see that.
Load More Replies...