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“Parents, What Secrets Do Your Children Think They Are Hiding From You?” (25 Answers)
Article created by: Rūta Zumbrickaitė
My older daughters, 10-year-old twins, have a secret - at night, when they are already in bed, they pretend to be asleep until my wife and I "supposedly" fall asleep too, and then tell each other made-up scary stories. We don't mind. Firstly, they fall asleep after about 20 minutes of such stories. Secondly, children's secrets are so cute and amusing!
And so, parents in this online thread on the AskReddit community also share similar secrets of their children - which they, as the kids themselves presume, have no idea about. And Bored Panda, in turn, makes a selection of the most interesting and touching stories from this thread for you.
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#1
I was talking to my dad about getting away with stuff when I was a kid and said, "You never knew that I would stay up reading every night with my flashlight".
He got an amused look on his face and responded, "You did that for years and never changed the batteries in that flashlight did you?"
That's when I realized he knew and was encouraging it the whole time.
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#2
My daughter's bike was lost/stolen after she left it at the bus stop. After a few days of looking she had given up on finding it. She was crushed and I couldn't take it. I picked up an identical bike, I took the training wheels off just like the first one. When I got home I tried to pass it off that I found her bike.
A couple of days later she told my wife, that she knew it wasn't her bike, but she didn't want to make me sad by telling me she knew.
I know that my daughter knows my secret, but is keeping it a secret from me.
#3
My best friend is a lesbian. We live in Russia, it’s not safe to discuss openly, and her mom is homophobic. So, the family doesn’t know.
Her father surely knows and just avoids all the drama by pretending he doesn’t. Last small talk with him at her place was hilarious.
— Hi username, how are you? Any kids?
— Not yet, no
— Are you also one of them?
— One of whom?
— Them - *pause, looks at his daughter* -Child free.
#4
My nephew lied as a kid but my mother knew and called him on it. He asked how she knew (I think she actually saw him do whatever it was wrong without him realising) she said his third eye on his forehead winked when he lied.
For about 2 years afterwards, whenever he lied he would do it with one hand over his forehead. So we *always* knew. It was great.
#5
My five year old sneaks into his 18 month old brother's bed every night. He thinks he's being sneaky, but I hear him crawl back into his own bed when I get up at 5am. It keeps both of them calm because our neighbors are loud and scare them often.
#6
Mine is still little enough to be very, very bad at hiding things. The other day he asked for a toffee. I said no. He went and got a toffee from the kitchen counter, 'hid' under the kitchen table, loudly unwrapped it, and when I still didn't react, he said 'I'm eating a toffee!' 😆.
#7
My 5 year old daughter has a stash of snacks inside of a cat tree. The cats usually end up dragging them out and then I overhear her scolding the cats.
I let this go on because 1) it's hilarious, and 2) it's nothing I haven't already given her. .
#8
My son has a crush on a girl in school. He walks home from school every day and visits our neighbors very old dog. My son gives him belly scratches and, in exchange, my neighbors dog doesn’t tell a soul what my son tells him.
However, the dogs owner…who is “working nearby in the garden” is an excellent eavesdropper and knows everything, and she in turn shares it with me.
He will never know that I know.
#9
My niece (4 yo) wrote her brothers name on the wall and claimed he did it. Her brother was not even a year old yet.
#10
My daughter thinks she "gets away" with reading when she should be asleep. The fact that I have such a large book expenditure each month is also a dead give away.
#11
My 2 year old tries to hide a car behind his back when I put him to bed. I pretend not to see it until he gets in the crib and go “ooooohh you got me soooo good! You tricked daddy!” Then I tickle him which causes him to drop the car, I take it and hide it. Then I continue to play with him for a minute until he forgets about the car.
#12
He likes to read my journal.
I'm an avid writer and keep several, including my laptop.
It honestly makes me laugh because no one, since my little sister eons ago, has expressed such interest in what I write.
What he doesn't know is that the one on my laptop is my *real* one, and it's password protected. The ones I leave on my bookshelf and office are the ones that are "safe" for him to read.
It tickles me to question him about stuff he shouldn't know but *knows* because he read it in my journal.
"Son, how do you know your Aunt and I are planning a trip next weekend?"
Deer caught in headlights look.
"I must have overheard you two talking..."
"Hmmm...".
#13
I know that my 10 year old writes long letters professing his love to a girl in his class but never gives them to her and throws them in the trash.
#14
My kids read in bed at night after bed time. They thought they were so clever buying book lights with their Christmas money.
#15
Not a parent, but when we were kids and one of us was sick, my parents would give us those disgusting purple Tylenol flu pills that you had to chew. My little sister would fake taking them and then stash them under the couch. Our house got flooded in a hurricane and when we pulled the couch out the carpet underneath was dyed purple from all the pills dissolving in the flood water.
#16
He had a secret character/identity he dresses up as in his room with a jacket and hat and acts out some hero thing. He’s never told us what it is. Been doing it for years.
#17
Right now, my 10 year old is supposed to be asleep. Instead she's laying in bed searching for "Zoro with his shirt off" and composing a folder with the pics. She has completely forgotten that we share a Google account. She's hasn't even gotten to time ship zoro yet.
#18
Mine wakes up early (some days) and sneaks in to take her phone to play games under her bed cover. I know it every time she does it. I don't tell anything.. 30 mins later I go to wake her up loudly so that she gets time to 'put it away'. And she pretends to have just woken up and I pretend to have not known that she was on her phone the last half hour.
#19
Oh, my kids think they're master spies sneaking candy at night, but little do they know, the wrappers left under the couch are like neon signs saying, 'We were here!' It’s like trying to hide a body but leaving the fingerprints.
#20
My daughter (10) has been using a shared Google doc to chat with a friend while they play games on the switch. She told me yesterday "I delete all the text so don't bother trying to see what I wrote." I wasn't planning on reading it but since she spoke up I went and checked and it was the most boring to the point game stuff ever. What pokemon they wanted to trade and what courses they wanted to do in Mario Kart.
#21
My friend has a 13-year-old son. I used his laptop to google something and his search history popped up with “thick girl walking dog” and “jiggle physics.” Lololololol.
#22
Not believing in Santa, she's playing her cards close for the other two that still seem to believe.
#23
That they are up in bed watching tv and not sleeping. I could resolve this but gives me a needed hour or two break.
#24
The cheap prepaid Android phone they bought so they have something to use when they get grounded from the phone we provide. Also so they can install apps we prohibit.
#25
I think my daughter is hiding snacks in her pillow.
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