“I Thought It Was Normal For Too Long”: 30 Weird And Disturbing Rules Parents Had Their Children Follow
As children, we don’t really give ourselves the luxury to question our parents' decisions. Nor do they allow us that.
Especially when it comes to the rules they set around their house and family life that you have little option but to comply with. Only when we grow up can we take a step back and look at these rules from a whole different perspective. And sometimes, we realize they made zero sense.
“What bizarre rule did your parents enforce that seemed normal, but when you grew up realized was not normal at all?” someone posed a question on the Ask Reddit community. Many people took the opportunity to get their childhood rules off their chest and share the stories with others. Below we selected the most interesting ones.
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Not me, but this guy in my neighborhood. So the 1st day of high school rolls around and there is this new kid at the bus stop. I try to make small talk, but he doesn't seem interested. I see him around school and he never talks to anyone. Everyday at the bus stop I try to make small talk and slowly, over many weeks, he says more and more.
One morning he says to me that I can come over after school for a snack. I'm like "Sure, dude". After school we go to his house and it is super clean. Like operating room clean. We sit at the kitchen table and his mom sits with us. He looks a little worried, but I don't understand why at the time.
As we eat our snack (sugar wafers and milk do NOT go together) his mom starts to ask me questions. Things like what music I listen to. What does my dad do for a living. What are my grades. What church do I go to. Lots of weird questions for a kid in the 9th grade. With some of my answers she would look to her son, who gave more and more worried looks. Eventually she stopped grilling me and said that her son needed to do his homework and I should leave. I was glad to get out of there at that point.
I go home and mention to one of my older brothers what happened and he was all "Holy s**t! You met the mole kid!". Turns out that this kid had lived in my neighborhood for all these years and I didn't even know it! He was home schooled and not let out in the front of the house.
Over the next 4 years we ruined this kid for his parents. He rebelled against their rules and became one of the guys. We introduced him to the world of sports, beer, weed, and girls.
After high school we lost touch (my fault. rough patch for me).
Hey Jason, if you read this, look up the guy who had all those older brothers back in high school. I miss you.
I will say this once...parents that are really strict with their kids out of fear that they will run with a bad crowd or get in trouble are actually creating the scenario in which they will rebel and run around with the very crowd you are trying to protect them from. If your kids spend their childhoods fearing you, they will never tell you when things go really wrong or ask for help. But they will turn to the people that gave them the most freedom to be themselves. Keep that in mind. I ran around with a bad crowd because I was afraid of my mother. But I will be forever grateful to the friends that gave me a sense of freedom that I never got at home.
We had to wake up whenever my parents got up, even if it was 4 a.m. One of them would yell up the stairs for us to get up. Didn't realize I could get up at my own leisure until I got married and moved out. One day I got out of bed when my husband did and we were sitting in the living room watching tv when I exclaimed that I was still tired, he said "So go back to bed then" and it was like those moments on a show when an actor just looks at the camera with a surprised expression. The sudden realization that I could wake up whenever I wanted was over whelming.
Also now that I have a kid I have no idea why they wouldn't let us sleep so they could have some free time? Like damn if my son is sleeping I'm taking in all the quiet and enjoying myself some free time.
4 minute shower restricted to once a week. This was when I was in high school. This is all my folks did to save money so it was all I was allowed as well. If I exceeded the 4 minutes they would turn off the hot water from the main valve by the water heater. Imagine that- a high school boy allowed one shower a week and only a 4 minute shower.
I now take a shower a day and sometimes two. And sometimes until the hot water runs out.
Teenage boys need to shower more than once a week. Adults too, really. Some people take money saving too far. I bet this saved them very little money.
Trust Game! Mom would hold knives to our necks sometimes and say "it ll all be over in a feeewwww minutes" or wake us up putting a pillow over our face and plugging our noses, same thing " it ll all be over in a fewww minutes" if we freaked out she get upset say we didn't trust her. Hence the trust game.
Normal parents take a toy away until their child's behavior improves, then returns the toy as a reward for good behavior.
My mother just took my stuff and never gave it back. She'd claim that we could 'earn' our toys back with extra chores and good grades, but she never followed through even though I was on honor roll every single semester. I was in college when the closet organizer in our hallway closet had a critical failure, so I came home to help move stuff. I found an entire box of my confiscated books and toys. I s**t you not, my mother picked up a beanie baby and looked at me sadly while she said, "I was waiting for you to earn this back." What, were you going to surprise me with after I walked the stage and got my diploma?
I wasn't allowed to have boys phone or come calling for me because my mom didn't want me to turn out to be "some little s**t".
Joke's on you, mom.
We had a lock on the fridge and were never allowed to help ourselves to anything - you had to ask, usually the answer was 'no'.
I started buying junk food and hiding it in my closet - I think my father was completely clueless about growing teenage appetites and smoked, so his appetite was almost non-existent.
I struggle with binge eating to this day - I still love a good gorge, it means freedom and a giant middle finger to that lock on the fridge.
This is so incredibly sad. My parents kept the snacks in a locked cupboard in the garage; my sis picked the lock and they moved the snacks. My mum used to hoard food in her room, and one time I snuck in there and ate some of it; I got into soooo much trouble over that. I was like 9 at the time.
My parents are pretty much hoarders so we would get in trouble for cleaning. My mom always blamed our house being messy on her just being "too busy" so once in junior high I thought I would surprise her and have the whole kitchen clean when she got home. I cleared all the piles off the counters, threw away a bunch of decades-old magazines, and took out like 2 giant bags of trash. When she got home she was NOT pleased, but panicked, and promptly went digging outside in the trash can to bring the stuff back in. :/
This is a mental illness - it's so hard for people to let go of stuff. Some people who suffer can clearly see what's wrong with them but can't help them self nor get help by professional. The others don't even see an issue with their behavior
Until the age of 13 myself and siblings each had to take baths with dad to ensure we cleaned everywhere.
My parents wouldn't let me do anything with friends if they felt I had "done enough that week" or "didn't need to" even when I hadn't done anything at all that particular week. My friends started calling it the fun meter. "Wanna come play basketball at the park or is your fun meter full this week?"
I feel this. My parents would arbitrarily let me go out with friends. No reason or rhyme to it.
Not a rule, just something that I never realized was weird until I was an adult. My mom had a phobia of needles, so she managed to find a dentist who didn't believe in giving novocaine shots. For any reason. Didn't even use that numbing gel.When you had a cavity, and needed to have your teeth drilled, he would just tell you to hold onto his assistant's hand, and squeeze when it hurt. Thank God, none of us ever needed to have a tooth pulled. As a result, I developed a phobia of dentists, and after I left my parents house at 18, waited 23 years, before I ever got up the nerve to go to a dentist again. When I finally did, they were shocked. The hygienist said, "Your teeth are beautiful. You don't even have any cavities." I said "I know. I do everything in my power to avoid having to come see you people."
I grew up with the same dentist experience… still have to get full anaesthesia or laughing gas for the most minor things. Thanks mom!
"You eat everything you're served". So if they put a whole lot of food on our plate, and we had already eaten enough and were not hungry anymore, we would have to stay on the table until we were done.
Took me hours.... Mom guilt tripping me (with "other children in the world are starving, how dare you.)... The times I was 4 hours at the table were plentiful, picking my food, then finally giving in. Then rewarded with doing the dishes at 10 or 11 at night... I wasn't even a teen.
Wait. This is gonna sounds weird. That ain't normal? That's been happening to me all my life man.
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"You'll sit there until you eat it and enjoy it if it takes till bloody midnight". Even if it was something they knew I didn't like. Thirty odd years later I still have a list of foods I can't stand, and hate it when people joke about it 'oh go on, just one sprout' etc.
This was our house. Found myself over eating regularly. Now, as an adult, I can't stand the thought of leaving uneaten food on the plate. But trying to break the habit since I know that is what caused most of my weight issues.
The thing that annoys me the most was that dad would tell us about how he was forced to eat everything on his plate as a kid and that he threw up, on several occasions, and he still did the same thing to us kids. He had been there, he knew it was pointless and he still did it. It also triggered the eating disorder that I've struggled with all my life.
Don't tell my mum but I had to put whatever it was that couldn't eat into my pocket and sneak it into the toilet to flush the evidence..I love you mum but cooking just isn't your strong point
Being made to eat everything on your plate is just a springboard to an eating disorder. I'm also including obesity and binge eating here as these are defined as eating disorders, not just anorexia and bulimia. People who can't self regulate their appetites either end up with food addictions or extreme food intake control.
This is how people develop eating disorders. I am very happy my mom always fought to let us eat what and how much we wanted. (Lots of people, including her mom, disagreed with her but she stood up to them.)
Your mom is a wise woman, and courageous when she stood up for you! Fortunately, I was also never forced to empty my plate. My SO was, and has a complicated relation with food and trouble maintaining a healthy weight. At out home, the rule for our daughter is that she has to eat at least a bite of everything on the plate, but after that she's free to eat as much or as little as she wants. She has a healthy appetite, especially now she's growing so fast, but also knows well when she had enough.
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My biologocal dad did this to me at a restaurant once when I was 6 or 7. I couldn’t finish an adult sized meal of fish and chips, but since he threatened and started getting angry with me, I managed to do it somehow. I puked it all up as soon as we got outside. Then he dragged me back in and made me tell the manager what happened so I said, all crying and embarrassed, “I threw up!” And my dad got his free coupon.
When my children were small they were encouraged to try a little bit of everything, and then choose what to put on their plate. They could keep coming back for more until they were full. However, it was not looked on favourably when they heaped up their plates and didn't eat what they had put on their own plates.
Idiots making their children suffer and develop eating disorders.
This!! I was a very picky and slow eater and wouldn't be allowed to leave the table till my plate was empty, which sometimes meant being at the kitchen table myself for hours after everyone else was finished. Also, I had a really bad overbite which caused me to chew with my mouth full, cause I literally couldn't close it...and that would get me a hit to the bottom of my chin....gawd I've bitten my tongue from that so many times I'm surprised its all there.
I couldn't stand meat. One summer my grandparents came to visit and told my mom that I should have to stay at the table until I ate it. I sat there every night with a piece in my mouth until bedtime when I was allow to spit it out. This went on for an entire summer until my mom gave up. I never did that c**p to my kids.
I like how my mom did it. I didn't have to like any food but I did have to take at least one bite of it. She also didn't make me a separate dinner if i didn't like what she was serving. Most of the time I DID like what she cooked, but she didn't coddle me. Learning to be open minded about a wide variety of foods served me very well as an adult traveling the world in the military.
this! even getting it back cold the next day (and if neccesary the next.......) until emptied
My parents never did this thank god, but one of my aunts did. When I was staying with her family for a while she told me I had to eat everything on my plate after I said I was full. Started yelling at me when I tried to refuse. Got a dining room table covered in my vomit as a result. :)
My parents did it. I still can't stand cauliflower. Even it's smell make me nauseous.
Yup, me too. I would wait at the table until they were fully engrossed in whatever tv show they were watching and then bury what I couldn't eat in the bottom of the bin.
I completely forgot this memory until I saw this! My mother would do this. She knew I hated meatloaf (ground beef to be exact, couldn't stand the stuff). Anyway, one night she made meatloaf and she made sit at the table all night, I fell asleep at the table! Woke the next day, had to sit at the table right up until it was time to go to school. I returned from school 7 hours later and had to sit right back down to the same plate of day-old meatloaf 🤢 By the time dinner rolled around, I was still still sitting at the table with that damn meatloaf! I got sent to bed that night with no food. My mother decided to ground me and basically starve me all week. She also "made too much" for free school lunch so there was no food for me there either.
Grandma did this, and thought we were too skinny so wouldn’t even let us have a drink until we ate. And this was 3 huge southern meals a day. Everything fried and salty. She was a great cook and I’d love to have a week with her now, but as a kid it was a struggle. Also, we weren’t skinny, just normal sized kids.
that sucked, hated chewing meat that got all dry and just gross and tasteless.
Kid in the 50's teen in the 60's. Same thing. Kids in China would love to have your food
I'm confused. This happened all the time growing up. This ain't normal? Oh no....
i had a similar eating situation. my mom was a health nut. even tho the food i was given was healthy i wasnt getting nutrients u find in fatty foods as well. it was kinda like i was on a diet i didnt need my whole childhood. it wasnt until a doctor told my mom i was way too skinny and underweight wen i was in 8th grade that my mom added things to my meals. it still wasnt enough tho. now i bc of it i have fragile bones, weak arm muscles and have a delicate stomach. my doctor says its bc of that that i have these problems. our diets completely changed however wen my mom got stomach cancer bc of not eating right. she changed her tune real quick bc she didnt want that happening to me. thankfully my delicate stomach just means that i need to stop the moment i feel full cuz if i dont ill have massive stomach pains.
I think this stems a lot from poorer families to not waste food. My dad does this and still does even though it's ok to have left overs. He doesn't want us to waste anything which I get but then just remind him we can save more for later.
If I didn’t like something that was on my plate, like my mom’s omelettes or fat on the meat (gag) my dad would make me sit there until I ate it. Fine dad, I’ll sit here all evening until my mom told him to stop it, I have to go to bed to get up for school. He never did clue in that he always lost this little game.
I would get the same, stepfather would take off his belt and put it on the table in front of me for'incentive'.
My bio and his third time's the charm monster had and LOVED THIS ONE!!! Until I had one too many meals consisting of only things I despised as a small child... It was well known I would refuse and drama would ensue. I was about 7 when my brother had enough of watching this treatment and decided to inhale his plate as fast as possible and throw it all back up across the entire table to save me and shut down the b******t. It did and they quit the forcefeeding things we hated just to have their little power move...
You know the classic movie moment "kid you're going to sit here at the table until you finish your vegetables"? That was me, but with meat. I never liked meat except boneless chicken. I would have rather had 2 servings of veg than any meat. But my dad would force me. Once he made me eat the fatty bits of a steak and I legitimately started choking so he gave me the children's heimlich maneuver, and I threw up in the process. He spanked me and then yelled at me while I cleaned it up. I really wish parents knew they were giving us eating disorder fuel.
I'm 42, only recently have I learned to put the guilt aside and stop eating when full because of this very rule. Overweight btw.
Exactly why I still clear my plate and have a major weight problem even though I know it's wrong...
We had to do this with French onion soup it’s a whole lot of onions with bread chunks like croutons that got soggy and mushy and broth stuff it took 3-4 hours for us to finish
Well, it's not that easy from the other side too... Kids tend to dismiss healthy and solid meals coz "not being hungry at all, honest" and then in 10 minutes start a full-blown tantrum coz they're "sooo hungry they're about to die, but only hungry for treats"... Also, it's hard to know, if it's a real disgust or manipulation or such... Forcing kids to stay at the table for hours is not good for sure, but...
Right there with you. Our rule is, eat your dinner and if you think you might be too full just be sure to eat your veggies. If you choose not to eat your veggies you can leave the table but you’re not getting anything else unless you eat them. We also give an alternative veggie if the kid just doesn’t like what’s been cooked after trying them, but it’s usually just something from a can that’s been microwaved or a raw veggie that they like.
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This back fired once on my family A dinner that was meant to last an hour later 5 and a half cause of me. Oh and when we got home I used up all the hot water for my shower so they had to either stay up all night or take cold showers. And it was a "church night" meaning the following morning we had church. They never did this to me again. Oh and the drive home tho short was dangerous and well icy
Are you my sibling?? My mom was the same! Maybe a generational thing?
i had this same rule and one time the food was disgusting and the put a whole bunch on my plate. no joke i almost threw up (but i swallowed it)
this had me crying because they would yell at me to eat it and i never told them i almost threw up
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This was very common in a lot of households, especially in families that were poor and/or went through the Depression. Even if a child really couldn't eat anymore, parents expected their children to finish everything on their plate to avoid waste and to make sure they didn't go hungry. This also happened a lot before their was good food storage, especially before fridges to keep food for later. Still, it's tough to keep eating when you're stuffed. Sometimes when I was small, instead of making my brother and I finish our food when we just couldn't anymore, my mom would just eat it for us if there wasn't enough left to make it worth keeping as leftovers, but too much to justify throwing it out.
Most parents did this to us. I try and not do this to my kids if I served them to much.
I hated meat but my mother said I had to eat it. After she found out all the ways I smuggled meat out and got rid of it, she said if I tried it again I’d have to eat dinner naked at the table. I learned to eat all the veg quickly and then wait as long as I could and scoff the meat down and after having my pockets and mouth checked, I’d run outside and throw up. I was 8 years old and it only stopped a year later because the school called my mother in because I was so underweight. I had further bouts of anorexia throughout life and have malformations on my teeth and vertebra from malnutrition in childhood.
This was a left over from the war when food was sparse, so you ate everything, because you had nothing before. I also had to sit there and eat everything, even the dry rubbery meat that made me gag.
I do not like cooked oatmeal for breakfast. I remember sitting at the table with the admittedly small bowl of gluey tasteless mush for hours until I had managed to gag it all down. Fortunately, I wasn't tortured with it again. Yes, I know, my husband cooked it properly, added raisins, brown sugar, and it wasn't as bad as how my family fixed it. Still not my favorite.
I know people who were forced to eat till they puked, and then had to eat the puke.
I grew up with my dad saying "You don't get down until it's cleared." and if we went to a buffet it was "Don't put anything on your plate you're not going to eat." As a result, I've had body dysmorphia since I was 13 years old, and I have wanted to be skinny and have a flat stomach. My depression made it so I basically trained my body to eat one meal a day and now that I actually want to fatten up and bulk up, because I'm underweight, I have my dad's voice in my head telling me that I'm "greedy" or a "gannet", or my body won't let me... For example, I ate so much on Sunday, that on Monday, I barely ate anything. I'm 28 and I'm underweight, but can't eat enough.
I felt this, my father (I hate calling him that) would put food, enough for two adults, on my plate and would make me sit for hours at the table until I finish my food, I realised later that it was abuse. I had problems with food ever since
I was a picky eater as a kid. I was always the last one at the table because I would not eat it, if I didn't like it. Never worked for me and I'm even pickier as an adult
I slept at tables and peed in chairs because I couldn't eat anymore more than once
Then don't laden the plate with heaps of food. And don't go telling kids about the starving millions if you put too much on their plate and they can't eat it. You're the one wasting food not your children.
My aunt worked in the school cafeteria and would give us all the extra stuff at the end if the year. My dad was in a MOOD and started b***h ing about wasted food. He made dinnercand cooked this industrial jar of canned spinach. It was so gross and he wouldn't let me get up until I ate it. Well joke was on him when I force fed myself and puked all over my plate and the table.
It's common and promotes overeating. I get it, parents, you worked hard on making the food, but if your child isn't hungry anymore, don't force them to eat. They have limitations.
My parents didn't subscribe to the so-called Clean Plate Club. We didn't have much money, so s my mother would make meals for my father and us kids, but nothing for herself. Her meal was whatever we left on the plate.
My dad did this. Even foods that made me physically sick. Nowadays I force myself to eat everything even if it makes me puke.
Nothing like cold broccoli for breakfast. If I didn't finish by bedtime, I got it for breakfast. Any wonder why I don't like leftovers now
I've never been a picky eater, but my mother did this with my brother and me all the time, and serve us like overweight adults. Guess what? Now we're overweight adults and I have a weird issue where if I start eating even when I feel full, I can easily just eat another meal. It's seriously screwed me up, but I guarantee you she doesn't think it's her fault and doesn't care.
Wow glad my mom wasn't this extreme. Her rule was, you what has been cooked, you couldn't be a picky eater. No fights no argument, sisters will sit their pouting until they will start eating. My mom always said those that are hungry will eat was put in front of them and learn to be grateful. =:P
That creates food Hatreds. I still can't stomach the taste of milk b/c I was forced to drink it, even if I'd been sitting at the dinner table in silent protest for hours & it had soured. It's a power trip game, not parenting. My parents thought obedience was the highest virtue (it never occurred to them that Nazis shared that opinion). On the other hand, some foods (like raw oysters) they said I shouldn't even bother with b/c they knew I'd hate them, I love today. Not sure if it's due to my "rebellious nature" or just that reverse psychology actually works as a parenting tool, lol.
Our houserule was, we eat what we put on our plate (Ourselves). If other people served us a plate of food, it was ok to leave some food. It was about portion control. I didn't grow up with an abundance of food in my family. We had to save money, and the rule was for us not to "hoard" food on the plate, we couldn't possibly eat. We, ofcource, was allowed to take a extra serving if we were hungry after finishing the plate. It worked.
Oh man. We have a rule. If you clean your plate, you get a popsicle after the meal. You don't have to clean your plate ever. It's always a choice. If there's not enough room in your tummy to finish your food, then there's no room for a popsicle either. Simple logic. No force feeding. Works like a charm with my daughter...for now.
I was raised in a fundy Christian household. Though our media options were limited to veggie tales and the like, we always had to ask before watching any video. Usually, the answer was a simple yes or no. But this one time, I was around 14 and asked my dad if I could watch Winnie the Pooh (it was for my little siblings, but I was bored). He told me, dead serious, that he needed to pray about it. Right there, he asked God for wisdom in deciding whether I should watch it or not. I stood there just trying to figure out if he was messing with me. He was not. After about a minute, he looks at me and says, "I guess that would be okay."
Juice always had to be watered down to 50%.
It wasn't a bad rule--saves calories and money--but it totally blew my mind when I found out that other families drink orange juice *full strength*.
Pure juice of any kind is bad for you - soo much sugar!!! A small glass isn't too bad but not loads of it :(
No one was allowed to s**t in our house. We had a large house and all 4 of us had our own restrooms. There was this little girl with special needs I used to play with when I was little and once she had to use the restroom. My mom asked me where she was and I said she's in the bathroom. My mom walked in on the poor girl mid-s**t and told her to go home and finish.
for those confused if you go to the source link then OP clarifies that no outsiders were allowed to s**t in OP’s house.
My dad had several weird ones to this day I still don't understand.
I wasn't allowed to read at the table while I was eating or drinking. Even if I was completely by myself drinking coffee, if he walked in on me he would berate me for having a 'toy' at the table.
No one in the family was allowed to drink at the counter in the kitchen. I have a habit of just draining a glass of water and pouring myself a second one. I didn't see the point of filling a glass, going to sit down, spend about a minute drinking, and then getting back up just to refill the glass. I tend to drain most drinks in a matter of seconds, so I got into the habit of just drinking at the counter. First time my dad saw me doing this he lost it yelling at me about how it wasn't normal and to sit down at the table while I drank.
Reading books before bedtime was forbidden. Everyone in the house throughout the day has to be 'productive'. Reading is for right before you go to bed. Finish all your chores before everyone else? F**k you, your brother/sister is still cleaning, you're just being lazy by sitting down to read a book!
He also had major issues with me just reading in general, even for class assignments. I actually had a full on argument with him a couple of times about The Great Gatsby and Catcher in the Rye I was reading for my English Lit class. He was trying to prevent me from reading them, but I shot back I had too because it counted towards my grade. The entire class also took a huge test on each book, so NOT reading wasn't an option.
Yeah, he was a bizarre person. Suffice to say we don't talk anymore.
The "duty before pleasure" policy makes sense until he said he had completed all his chores but he couldn't relax because he had to help his sibling completing their chores. It's really stupid, to be honest. It's just going to make the kids work slowly so they won't be the first to finish and have to do more work. If I still have to work after I've done my work how can I be motivated to work faster? It really makes no sense, parents' wise.
I wasn't allowed to say anything my parents didn't like - it would result in an immediate grounding or "fine" from my allowance. As for rules, no sleeping past 10 am. Ever. All chores must be done before going out or doing anything. Only one hour of T.V per evening and only one dessert per week. One hour of internet at a time (this was early 2000ish) and only if my dad wasn't using the computer (he always was).
Now for the weird ones...
- no farting
- no ketchup on potatoes or eggs
- no more than a tablespoon or so of a condiment at any given time
- no hiccups
- if you had hiccups, no eating or drinking (edit: or speaking)
- no being "hyper" - ever.
- no getting angry
- no using the washroom upstairs
- no speaking during T.V shows at all (on the rare occasion that I was allowed to watch T.V upstairs).
And the pièce de résistance...
- (For a year or so) no using the word I
I wasn't allowed to sleep over at friends' houses until I was almost in middle school. Why? Because my mother was afraid that we would play Russian Roulette.
Here's a christmas-y one for ya'll!
No christmas presents after you turn 12
- t'was okay since we barely got presents from my mum (who we lived with) and my dad (I don't think I had even seen him in 4 years at the time.)
BUT THEN...
she spread the rule to my abuelita and grandpa (the only other people we got presents from.) ugh.
Oh and we also had to make all our own food since we were 13 which made me take to only binge eating at lunch and nothing else all day.
Oh AANNDD she would hurt our pets if they hurt her. I mean like if a cat ever scratched her (wow really who woulda thought cats do that?) she would scream really loud and bite the cat.
Fun fact: I've never had a full punch on with anyone other than my mum...maybe my sister but ya know...kids.
The cat one is the worst one! It's still just an animal and just reading that the mom hurt the kitty hurts my heart.
Not I, but my father's stepmother used to make he and my aunt clean up the living room, kitchen, and dining room while her and her "real children" were taken to McDonalds, every Friday.
The most f****d up thing is, my father said that the first time she made them clean up, she said that her and the two step-siblings would switch off every week as to who would clean and who would go to McDonalds. He said he doesn't ever remember going to McDonalds. Neither does my aunt.
He was 7, she was 12.
I treated my step kids like my own. No longer with their mom, over 10 years now. None of the three speak to their mother and 2 out of three don't speak to their father either. My stepson (M24) recently asked me for permission to change his last name to mine as he doesn't want to be associated with either birth parent.
Only 3 sheets of toilet paper allowed per visit. This included if you went number 2. I swear my mum used to stand outside and listen and she just knew when I used more and I would get yelled at and the door nearly broken down. This ran into my teens.
That 'the man' was watching us (my sister and I as kids).
Not santa, literally 'the man'.
So say if we were playing up, they'd go 'you'd better stop that, he's watching' and we'd quit immediately for the impending dread this man would bring. How f*****g creepy is that?
No saying "no." As long as someone asks kindly you have to say yes.
I wasn't allowed to be a witch on Halloween because my parents were afraid it would offend actual witches. I also wasn't allowed to be a ghost because they were afraid I would attract actual ghosts and I wasn't allowed to be a vampire because they were afraid a real vampire might mistake me for a real vampire. Both my parents were highly superstitious and into the occult, which I didn't realize until later since we went to temple and I went to hebrew classes, but apparently my father was secretly a practicing wiccan and my mother was just going along with everything. Somehow they both got it into their heads that I was attracting poltergeists that were specifically out to get my mom and so they decided I wasn't allowed to do anything that could attract evil spirits. For some reason this rule didn't seem to apply to my brother...
Your father wasn't a Wiccan, he was a mental case. Oh he may have read something about the Wiccan religion, but he missed entirely the point of what he had read and focused entirely on what could feed his existing anxieties and obsessions until he reached borderline dangerously insane territory. I sure hope you got out of that scene.
My step-dad when I was growing up was a very strange man. We had to sign and date the inside of our toilet tissue rolls because he wanted to make sure we weren't going through TP too fast. Want to borrow a pencil? I did in 7th grade. I had to write and sign a one page lease (with said pencil) outlining the whole scenario and how I would return it, when, in what condition...
My allowance was $1/week. This paid for toothpaste, shampoo, and conditioner. Nice...
My mom had to put receipts of the grocery trips on the fridge and he'd pay her for specific items he deemed were his. He was such a piece of work.
My mother was a bit younger than he, so his children weren't in her children's age bracket, and none of us were very close. In middle school he gave me his daughter's diary from years before when she was in high school. I read about a page and was horrified that he was abusing her privacy in such a way. He loved to mention when I was 16 that I was as pretty as I would ever be and if he were younger and not married to my mother...(as if). I even had to pay rent to live at home IN HIGH SCHOOL.
He was special. And I don't mean that in a good way. The only positive thing about it was I was naturally a very shy person, but he put my hackles up so much that I became very argumentative and adversarial in regards to him. Overall, that wasn't a bad skill to develop. That man's bare feet never touched the ground or felt blades of grass in his life. He was afraid of germs and Catholic guilt and "that one experience in college" with his roommate. He was just a man who couldn't deal with himself so he lorded himself over others in strange ways. What I've mentioned is the tip of a very large iceberg of weirdness.
He was something strange to grow up with. I'm still a people pleaser to a degree, but when my bs meter goes off I have zero patience for it and speak or act accordingly--mostly because I spent my last few years when they were still married being defiant towards him. Who wouldn't?
Sadly, I had a friend from that age whose step-dad was WAY worse than what I had to deal with, but that isn't my story to tell.
I never got an allowance...but I didn't have to pay for my own deodorant or shampoo. I also rarely went to the movies or out anywhere with friends because I had no money. When I was in high school, my friends usually paid for me. I'm forever grateful for them giving me a life outside of my home.
My mom never let us whistle - she sad it would attract mice. I now know she was just making stuff up because whistling was annoying to her lol
I also heard about this superstition, so it's not just your mother. Another one - if you whistle you'll go broke.
My parents made us kids use the back door to get in and out of the house, the front door was for parents and guests only. I thought it was normal for too long.
8:30 bedtime. My. Entire. Damned. Life. Though, I knew as a teenager that making your high schooler go to bed when it was still light out half the time was whacko.
Well into my 20s I'd come back to visit for the holidays and dad would get up to use the toilet at night, see the light on in my room from me being awake reading a book at 10 p.m., and yell at me to go to sleep.
I was raised a Jehovahs Witness, so yeah. Not having friends outside of religion was pretty strictly enforced until I got into my teens.
Everything I read about JWs makes me more and more concerned because I know one and she's really nice. She's also lesbian, does anyone know the JW opinions on that?
We weren't allowed to take our clothes/shoes to mom's. We had to change into what we wore when we arrived. It wasn't until I was in middle school that I learned that other kids *own* their stuff. Weird.
Actually, I get this. When she was 5, my stepdaughter's mom would send her in clothes that were too small, too large, with holes or stains, or didn't match. If we bought her clothes and she took them home, we'd never see them again. About a year or so in, I asked my husband to let me buy her clothes that she kept at our house. When she arrived, she'd wear what I got her that actually fit and were in good condition. When she went home, she had to change back into her home clothes that she came in. Sometimes we would get her things she could take home, but we knew we might never see it again. Sure enough, by the time she was in late elem/middle school, her mom was taking her clothes that we bought her. Sigh. Now, we have full custody so it's no longer an issue.
Note: this post originally had 91 images. It’s been shortened to the top 30 images based on user votes.
So many of these posts are examples of abusive behaviour, so sad and sorry for all involved X
I didn't have the patience to get through all of them but from the ones I saw, I agree. Some of these parents have no business have children under their care.
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Too bad people aren't required to study and pass a test before being allowed to have children.
I had to go through more scrutiny to get an abandoned dog from a rescue than 2 adults who decide to make a new human.
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Okay, I couldn’t even get through the first 10. This is one of the most horrific posts I’ve ever read on here. I hope all these people who grew up in these abusive situations are doing okay now. 😞❤️
As a parent I'm a firm believer in picking my battles - why would I make my life and theirs more difficult by making up stupid rules that have zero logic behind it? I'm pretty laid back as to what my kids are allowed but you can bet your a*s I expect them to be decent humans and show people respect - as to how much toilet roll I really don't care as long as I'm not dealing with skid marks, if they're hungry then eat, if your not then don't - I really don't understand why anyone has kids just to make their everyone's lives miserable - what is the freaking point?
These posts are all examples of horrible physical, emotional and sexual abuse. I hope these people are ok today.
This stuff is HORRIBLE. The only "rules" we have are: If you spill the salt, pour some over your left shoulder. If it's yellow, let it mellow, if it's brown, flush it down. Last one out locks the door. If you're going downstairs, take something down. If you're going up, take something up. If someone makes a particularly hilarious or incisive comment, you must high five them. No drinking directly from the jug. All these "rules" are agreed upon family rules, that are part of our family "folklore".
All these parents acting like they've been held ar gunpoint by their own future children's souls and been forced to conceive them. Uhm no, you deliberately decided to have kids (or your inconsiderate actions led to a pregnancy) and you have to raise them, provide for them, create for them a sane, healthy and positive environment, do everything for them to grow up and become functioning adults. Your kids shouldn't pay for their food or their basic hygiene products, feeding and clothing them is not a "gift" from your own part, that's not even the minimum standard... And those post, my friends are like the poster child (or whatever it's called) for the legalization of abortion, contraception and sex education. I wonder how many more kids will be born in a household where they are not wanted, maybe even hated... How will they be treated?
Agree with you on how kids don't owe their parents anything, etc. but society does push women in the direction of "settling down and having children." Going against that is something that takes effort and strength that some people don't have or want to muster. Hell, some people don't even realize it's an option, partly because of how they were raised by their parents. It doesn't excuse the behavior but I would argue many if not most people don't even consiously sit down and decide to have and raise children. Which is a huge problem and needs ro change.
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My first Stepdad was obese. He weighed 320lbs, and he hated me and my brothers, but I made sure he took it out on me. He would hit my mom because she wouldn't give us up for adoption. He would quickly burn me with his cigars, slap me for no reason and call me stupid and useless. He would stand on my back, crushing me. I lit a cigar he was holding When my youngest brother was born, his biological son, he got even nastier. He would punch me and slap me. On one occasion, hit put my hand in the gas cooker ring while it was lit because I passed him his lighter. I think I had coined the phrase Fat B*st*rd before Chubby Brown or Mike Myers. I also suffered from rage issues. I still do. I avoid fights and conflict because I escalate quickly and become very violent. Luckily, it triggers in defence and I never start a fight. One day, he kicked me over at the top of the stairs at home and jumped on my back. I snapped and stood straight up. I was 11 at the time, and he fell down the stairs.
He saw me screaming as I leapt down the stairs at him with both fists balled up and moved out of the way. The neighbour came rushing in thinking someone had broken into our house and was attacking us. It only ended when my mom finally snapped and smashed a pottery chicken over his head on new years eve at a party we were throwing and told him to get the f*ck out and told everyone what he did and does. The stories I could tell you would make your blood boil. He's dead now. I had a party with my brothers. We had cake
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You have to study, pass a test, and get a license to become a doctor, a layer, or a teacher. You have to study, pass a test, and get a license to drive a car. In most cases, you have to undergo periodic re-licensing or recertification to show that your skills have remained current. Yet we have none of those requirements to become a parent, even though unqualified people have the potential to ruin their children's lives, and possibly pass that ruination down for generations. What is wrong with this picture?
I kinda think therapy should be mandatory during pregnancy and a few years of the child's life. Sometimes it's nobody's fault that they don't know better, but people can absolutely be taught what's good for children and what isn't.
Load More Replies... Wow, where to begin. 1. I wasn't allowed to date while living at home but I also couldn't move out until I was married. Figure that one out. 2. If I cooked anything, I had to clean up before eating it and if my brothers were hungry and I want eating the food they could help themselves even if I was washing so I could eat it. That translates to cold food or no food if any of my brothers were home. 3. I couldn't make phone calls unless a parent approved and they were on the other line listening. I never called anyone since the answer was normally no or they were too busy to monitor it. 4. No changing your hair without permission. 5. No borrowing other people's clothes. I couldn't buy my own either. 6. No sports except the girl ones and they had to take me if they had time which they never did. So I got a little chubby which they ridiculed me for. These are just what come to mind. I've suppresses most of my childhood. I think the reasons for that are obvious.
i grew up with an abusive, mentally ill mother that was basically a combination of all of the above. i'm 51 years old now and to this day i still sometimes get nightmares. i am so sorry for all the things these people have had to endure
My heart goes out to all of these poor abused kids. I hope life is better.
As children, all food and drink had to be consumed sitting at the table except water. Only exception was special movie nights when we would have snacks and pop in front of the tv. As an adult, I still eat every meal sitting at the kitchen table. Keeps the house clean and the furniture unstained so I mostly think it’s a good rule.
Pinching. Like constantly. There was nothing inappropriate about it, just stupid. Father would pinch our forearms or lower back and simply thought it was funny we - me and my sister - squeeled and whimpered, thought it for some kind of prank. He came from a very abusive family which explains he never had a chance to see how to treat people nice, and he was otherwise mostly okay, but we never got this annoying habit out of him. Disgusted me so much I still don't do well with people behind my back or touching these parts of me (though otherwise I love to hug and cuddle) and myself, I never touched a person - or a pet as a matter of fact - otherwise than softly and with their consent.
This was Truly Sad to read & Breaks my heart 💔 to know so many have been hurt , traumatized and robbed of a childhood that was not Wonderful. So much Mental Illness & Cult behaviors. In tears I read this 😢 wishing there was a way for this disgusting reproduction of sick humans acting less than. 😔 it's horrible secrets to carry. And I an so very sorry. This is not even the tip of the truth. Evil effing people These are some truth we have learned , but Much More than we could ever know is out there happening Right now.💔
Not all parents can or should have kids But all kids need to have a good parent
Some people evidently have kids just so they have minions to boss around. That's so gross.
My mother, of blessed memory, was by and large great. However, if I went to a friend's house after school with a SAHM, I would call to let her know and she would always tell me to go back home....to an empty house....and wait there for hours for someone else to come home. I wish I could ask her what that was all about.
I don't understand how these people had the energy to be like this with kids.
This post wasn't what I was expecting. A?lot of these were abusive. Reed them all.
I don't let my kids in case there's a p3do there and no supervision-
My brother and sister and I couldn't even be in the yard when he cut grass. I didn't cut grass the first time until I almost 30. When a new theatre came to town, it was near our local airport. We could never go to that theatre because it was in the landing path of planes. (Funny thing, though, years after he passed, a small plane did crash right next to the airport.) I could go on and on, but those are my top two! I will admit, however, it has made me much more safety conscious, even though I have an irrational fear of fire and checking the mail on just about any road!
feel so sad reading these comments. while i would never call myself a perfect parent i could never institute most of these rules. i have one son. because i was aware that other parents didn't always supervise their kids i made my home welcoming for his friends as i could keep an eye on them. rules were simple: no alcohol/drugs/smoking/cussing. respect my house-don't break it. respect my dogs. pick up after yourself including son's room if you helped mess it up. and, just because i wanted to make sure they respected my rules one silly one: if you have a penis then no earrings. it was always a secret chuckle to see the boys filing in while they removed their earrings and put them in their pockets. of all the boys that spent time in m home only one violated the rules which banned him from the house. he was a good kid, he was sorry but i had to be firm. his mom even called to see if i would rescind my decision but i had to keep as an example. sorry lenny-you were still a good kid
I feel sorry for Lenny. Could you not have just given him a temporary "grounding" from your house? Lol
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Probably not. Abusive controlling parents exist everywhere.
Load More Replies... So many of these posts are examples of abusive behaviour, so sad and sorry for all involved X
I didn't have the patience to get through all of them but from the ones I saw, I agree. Some of these parents have no business have children under their care.
Load More Replies... Too bad people aren't required to study and pass a test before being allowed to have children.
I had to go through more scrutiny to get an abandoned dog from a rescue than 2 adults who decide to make a new human.
Load More Replies... Okay, I couldn’t even get through the first 10. This is one of the most horrific posts I’ve ever read on here. I hope all these people who grew up in these abusive situations are doing okay now. 😞❤️
As a parent I'm a firm believer in picking my battles - why would I make my life and theirs more difficult by making up stupid rules that have zero logic behind it? I'm pretty laid back as to what my kids are allowed but you can bet your a*s I expect them to be decent humans and show people respect - as to how much toilet roll I really don't care as long as I'm not dealing with skid marks, if they're hungry then eat, if your not then don't - I really don't understand why anyone has kids just to make their everyone's lives miserable - what is the freaking point?
These posts are all examples of horrible physical, emotional and sexual abuse. I hope these people are ok today.
This stuff is HORRIBLE. The only "rules" we have are: If you spill the salt, pour some over your left shoulder. If it's yellow, let it mellow, if it's brown, flush it down. Last one out locks the door. If you're going downstairs, take something down. If you're going up, take something up. If someone makes a particularly hilarious or incisive comment, you must high five them. No drinking directly from the jug. All these "rules" are agreed upon family rules, that are part of our family "folklore".
All these parents acting like they've been held ar gunpoint by their own future children's souls and been forced to conceive them. Uhm no, you deliberately decided to have kids (or your inconsiderate actions led to a pregnancy) and you have to raise them, provide for them, create for them a sane, healthy and positive environment, do everything for them to grow up and become functioning adults. Your kids shouldn't pay for their food or their basic hygiene products, feeding and clothing them is not a "gift" from your own part, that's not even the minimum standard... And those post, my friends are like the poster child (or whatever it's called) for the legalization of abortion, contraception and sex education. I wonder how many more kids will be born in a household where they are not wanted, maybe even hated... How will they be treated?
Agree with you on how kids don't owe their parents anything, etc. but society does push women in the direction of "settling down and having children." Going against that is something that takes effort and strength that some people don't have or want to muster. Hell, some people don't even realize it's an option, partly because of how they were raised by their parents. It doesn't excuse the behavior but I would argue many if not most people don't even consiously sit down and decide to have and raise children. Which is a huge problem and needs ro change.
Load More Replies... My first Stepdad was obese. He weighed 320lbs, and he hated me and my brothers, but I made sure he took it out on me. He would hit my mom because she wouldn't give us up for adoption. He would quickly burn me with his cigars, slap me for no reason and call me stupid and useless. He would stand on my back, crushing me. I lit a cigar he was holding When my youngest brother was born, his biological son, he got even nastier. He would punch me and slap me. On one occasion, hit put my hand in the gas cooker ring while it was lit because I passed him his lighter. I think I had coined the phrase Fat B*st*rd before Chubby Brown or Mike Myers. I also suffered from rage issues. I still do. I avoid fights and conflict because I escalate quickly and become very violent. Luckily, it triggers in defence and I never start a fight. One day, he kicked me over at the top of the stairs at home and jumped on my back. I snapped and stood straight up. I was 11 at the time, and he fell down the stairs.
He saw me screaming as I leapt down the stairs at him with both fists balled up and moved out of the way. The neighbour came rushing in thinking someone had broken into our house and was attacking us. It only ended when my mom finally snapped and smashed a pottery chicken over his head on new years eve at a party we were throwing and told him to get the f*ck out and told everyone what he did and does. The stories I could tell you would make your blood boil. He's dead now. I had a party with my brothers. We had cake
Load More Replies... You have to study, pass a test, and get a license to become a doctor, a layer, or a teacher. You have to study, pass a test, and get a license to drive a car. In most cases, you have to undergo periodic re-licensing or recertification to show that your skills have remained current. Yet we have none of those requirements to become a parent, even though unqualified people have the potential to ruin their children's lives, and possibly pass that ruination down for generations. What is wrong with this picture?
I kinda think therapy should be mandatory during pregnancy and a few years of the child's life. Sometimes it's nobody's fault that they don't know better, but people can absolutely be taught what's good for children and what isn't.
Load More Replies... Wow, where to begin. 1. I wasn't allowed to date while living at home but I also couldn't move out until I was married. Figure that one out. 2. If I cooked anything, I had to clean up before eating it and if my brothers were hungry and I want eating the food they could help themselves even if I was washing so I could eat it. That translates to cold food or no food if any of my brothers were home. 3. I couldn't make phone calls unless a parent approved and they were on the other line listening. I never called anyone since the answer was normally no or they were too busy to monitor it. 4. No changing your hair without permission. 5. No borrowing other people's clothes. I couldn't buy my own either. 6. No sports except the girl ones and they had to take me if they had time which they never did. So I got a little chubby which they ridiculed me for. These are just what come to mind. I've suppresses most of my childhood. I think the reasons for that are obvious.
i grew up with an abusive, mentally ill mother that was basically a combination of all of the above. i'm 51 years old now and to this day i still sometimes get nightmares. i am so sorry for all the things these people have had to endure
My heart goes out to all of these poor abused kids. I hope life is better.
As children, all food and drink had to be consumed sitting at the table except water. Only exception was special movie nights when we would have snacks and pop in front of the tv. As an adult, I still eat every meal sitting at the kitchen table. Keeps the house clean and the furniture unstained so I mostly think it’s a good rule.
Pinching. Like constantly. There was nothing inappropriate about it, just stupid. Father would pinch our forearms or lower back and simply thought it was funny we - me and my sister - squeeled and whimpered, thought it for some kind of prank. He came from a very abusive family which explains he never had a chance to see how to treat people nice, and he was otherwise mostly okay, but we never got this annoying habit out of him. Disgusted me so much I still don't do well with people behind my back or touching these parts of me (though otherwise I love to hug and cuddle) and myself, I never touched a person - or a pet as a matter of fact - otherwise than softly and with their consent.
This was Truly Sad to read & Breaks my heart 💔 to know so many have been hurt , traumatized and robbed of a childhood that was not Wonderful. So much Mental Illness & Cult behaviors. In tears I read this 😢 wishing there was a way for this disgusting reproduction of sick humans acting less than. 😔 it's horrible secrets to carry. And I an so very sorry. This is not even the tip of the truth. Evil effing people These are some truth we have learned , but Much More than we could ever know is out there happening Right now.💔
Not all parents can or should have kids But all kids need to have a good parent
Some people evidently have kids just so they have minions to boss around. That's so gross.
My mother, of blessed memory, was by and large great. However, if I went to a friend's house after school with a SAHM, I would call to let her know and she would always tell me to go back home....to an empty house....and wait there for hours for someone else to come home. I wish I could ask her what that was all about.
I don't understand how these people had the energy to be like this with kids.
This post wasn't what I was expecting. A?lot of these were abusive. Reed them all.
I don't let my kids in case there's a p3do there and no supervision-
My brother and sister and I couldn't even be in the yard when he cut grass. I didn't cut grass the first time until I almost 30. When a new theatre came to town, it was near our local airport. We could never go to that theatre because it was in the landing path of planes. (Funny thing, though, years after he passed, a small plane did crash right next to the airport.) I could go on and on, but those are my top two! I will admit, however, it has made me much more safety conscious, even though I have an irrational fear of fire and checking the mail on just about any road!
feel so sad reading these comments. while i would never call myself a perfect parent i could never institute most of these rules. i have one son. because i was aware that other parents didn't always supervise their kids i made my home welcoming for his friends as i could keep an eye on them. rules were simple: no alcohol/drugs/smoking/cussing. respect my house-don't break it. respect my dogs. pick up after yourself including son's room if you helped mess it up. and, just because i wanted to make sure they respected my rules one silly one: if you have a penis then no earrings. it was always a secret chuckle to see the boys filing in while they removed their earrings and put them in their pockets. of all the boys that spent time in m home only one violated the rules which banned him from the house. he was a good kid, he was sorry but i had to be firm. his mom even called to see if i would rescind my decision but i had to keep as an example. sorry lenny-you were still a good kid
I feel sorry for Lenny. Could you not have just given him a temporary "grounding" from your house? Lol
Load More Replies... Probably not. Abusive controlling parents exist everywhere.
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