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Right, so you might think, "Who are we to give out relationship advice?" That's like the blind leading the blind. And you are right. We are not some relationship counselors; however, if you add every Panda's dating experience, you might be able to learn a thing or two. And frankly, we've been given some pretty bad relationship advice in the past. And we are not talking about bad dating advice like "only date someone with money." (No further explanation is required as to why it's wrong.) Instead, we want to stress that not all advice is good or good for you, no matter how common and deeply rooted in society.

Many dating tips and relationship advice are either overly romanticized or strongly polarized, leaving no room for choice or interpretation. And considering that things are rarely so either black or white in real life, much of this advice can be misleading. Hence, we will attempt to take the pink-colored glasses off, see things for what they actually are, and try to "debunk" some of, in our opinion, the worst dating advice, non-negotiables in a relationship, and marriage tips that you should probably think twice about before giving to someone, much less following yourself. Not because none of the advice has proven itself true in the past (as certainly some of it has), but because there's often more to it than meets the eye. And what worked for some might not necessarily work for everyone. 

Below, we've compiled some, in our opinion, bad dating tips and bad relationship advice that shouldn't be followed blindly and, instead, taken with a (huge) grain of salt. Do you agree with some of the examples? If so, give those an upvote. Also, if you had to offer (you probably already did) a bit of advice to a friend in a bad relationship, what would it be? Let us know in the comments!

#1

Children Will Save Your Relationships

Children Will Save Your Relationships

Many couples experiencing difficulties in their marriage believe that having a child would resolve their problems. Sadly, this approach is poorly thought out. A baby won't improve communication, so be completely honest with yourself and each other about what's happening before you decide to have a child as a last-ditch attempt to fix your marriage. Don't put pressure on someone who hasn't even come into this world.

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FlatEarf2.0
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Whaaaaaaat? You mean having a child with a person I don't love doesn't make me love them?

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#2

Leave The Past In The Past

Leave The Past In The Past

In a new relationship, it's important to stop dwelling on the past. However, certain matters are still important to talk about. You should talk about your health, problems that could hinder having kids, and disabling conditions that would make engaging in particular activities challenging. Also, your partner has a right to know whether past financial issues might imperil your relationship.

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Siobhan O'Rourke
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If past traumas could simply forgotten and left in the past life would be wonderful for many people..Trauma is stored in the body. It can't be left behind. At best it can be managed, ideally with love and understanding from loved ones.

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#3

You Have The Right To Read Their Personal Messages

You Have The Right To Read Their Personal Messages

No, you don't. If you believe you have a right to read your partner's texts, it really says more about you than it does about them. Examine your own anxieties, or admit to yourself that you are with someone you don't trust.

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Yuffa Kinazzo
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Had a girl friend take care of my dogs while I was out of town for a week. (I have never cheated in any relationship) When I came home, apparently she had searched every inch of my house. When the light hit it just right I found footprints, her footprints on the counter tops. She was looking for "Stuff " on top of the kitchen cabinets. Seriously??

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#4

Play Hard To Get

Play Hard To Get

Playing hard to get with a person you are interested in will likely result in you staying single as a pringle! Very few people have the time and "drive" to persistently pursue someone who doesn't return the effort. At least not today, with the abundance of options on dating apps. And no, the phrase "If I'm too much, go find less" is not applicable here. If you like the person, quit playing these silly games AND👏SHOW👏SOME👏EFFORT.

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Binky Melnik
Community Member
9 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Pringle’s come in cans of what? A hundred or so? So where did the meaningless phrase “single as a Pringle” come from? They’re not “single”; each has roughly a hundred siblings. How the hell did this catch on?

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#5

You Don't Need An Equal Partner

You Don't Need An Equal Partner

It's essential to understand that anybody you decide to be in a relationship with is a worthy and deserving partner. It all comes down to respect and communication. What's the point if you don't feel like you can interact with each other and respect each other on the same level?

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Trash Panda 🦝
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The best relationship advice I've ever been given was posed as a question. He said, what do you think it should be, 50/50? I said, well... Yeah. He said, No. No it's not 50/50. It's 100/100. You BOTH have to give it your all, because you're BOTH gonna take it all at some point. You give her everything you've got for the times she doesn't have it. That way when she needs it, there's not a doubt in her mind that whatever it is, she knows you're there and y'all will get through it together, and vice versa. That always stuck with me.

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#6

Their Jealousy Just Means They Love You

Their Jealousy Just Means They Love You

A little envy now and again is fine. Still, if your partner frequently gets bitten by the green-eyed monster, it can indicate a dysfunctional relationship. Imagine someone who refuses to let you see their family and friends out of jealousy or becomes envious if you go out for coffee with a coworker. These behaviors can go too far and result in abusive conditions.

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Trash Panda 🦝
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah... It's NOT cute. It DOESN'T mean they love you SOOOO much. How many Dateline episodes have you seen that involve a jealous lover? Exactly.

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#7

They Can Change

They Can Change

People can change, absolutely. But it's highly unlikely that they will ever do it for you. In fact, it's often the things we tend to ignore at the beginning of the relationship, hoping that the person will change their ways, that become the reason for breaking up, either months or years into a relationship. So look out for red and green flags in a relationship as soon as you become involved.

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Yuffa Kinazzo
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

She will never change. Although I hope she does or at least finds happiness. Good luck to the next guy.

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#8

A Woman Who Earns More Can Be Threatening To A Male Partner

A Woman Who Earns More Can Be Threatening To A Male Partner

Surprisingly, many women are still advised to hide their achievements when dating. But, some men are just more suitable for domestic duties. In fact, many guys are far better than their partners at cleaning and cooking. And that's totally OK! Thankfully, today couples believe that gender roles can be flexible and that their ability to function as a team is way more important than any gender stereotypes or societal norms.

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KBT
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm a woman with a high paying job and there's no greater turn off than a male who gets insecure about my pay grade.

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#9

Love Hurts

Love Hurts

Although that may sound theatrically romantic, nothing could be farther from reality. True love doesn’t hurt. A person who does not know how to love you does.

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Siobhan O'Rourke
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That's rubbish. Most people have feelings and even behaviour they struggle to understand and manage. We all have flaws and even with the utmost effort we all hurt our loved ones unintentionally from time to time. It's our responsibility to keep working on our flaws and to get away from those who can't accomplish consistent kindness but within that we will hurt those we love occasionally.

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#10

Relationships Should Always Be Easy

Relationships Should Always Be Easy

You shouldn't quarrel with your partner daily, but thinking that all relationships should be "smooth" is the wrong attitude. The bad news is that most relationships will need some level of work and hardship, even pain. The good news is that it doesn't have to endure forever; the condition is typically transient rather than permanent.

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Trash Panda 🦝
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'd like yall's opinion on this... To me (speaking as an American to other Americans. Sorry, guys), politics has replaced everything else as far as common interests obstacles go. Religion? Education? Race? Those bare no obstacle to most couples here today. Politics? Oh hell no. If you voted for Trump or are a Republican period, I'll pay for that 1st drink we had, then wish you the best of luck.

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#11

The Kids Should Always Come First

The Kids Should Always Come First

Putting your children first is not bad, but doing so always puts the pair up for many conflicts throughout their relationship. Not the kids, but the relationship must come first. The kids will do well if the bond between their parents is solid and trustworthy. Also, when you prioritize your children's needs and wishes over your own, an imbalance of authority emerges. At this point, you must remember who is the adult in the situation and who has to obey whom.

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KBT
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh for f***s sake... IF YOU ARE A PARENT, YOUR CHILD NEEDS TO BE YOUR TOP PRIORITY, NOT YOUR PARTNER. Your partner can take care of themselves, your child cannot. Anyone who prioritizes their romantic partner over their children is a bad parent, and I'll die on that hill.

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#12

The Man Should Pay

The Man Should Pay

This archaic dating advice has an easy substitute: Whoever asked for the date should pay. Either way, always ask the other person to pay or divide the cost. It's a kind act that makes a big difference. While other women are content to foot the bill independently, some find it more comfortable when the male pays for everything. Here, there is no right or wrong answer.

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#13

Opposites Attract

Opposites Attract

A recipe for disaster is looking for someone completely different from you in any meaningful way. You must have some shared goals and principles. If not, there won't be any glue holding the partnership together. We are attracted to our romantic partners not because they are "opposites" but because of specific personality features, interests, and even biological cues.

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Super Beast
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

your opinions on sex, kids, money and politics, and your future plans should match. other than these, diversity is key. find people who think differently. you'll both be better for it.

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#14

Time Heals All Wounds

Time Heals All Wounds

Firstly, time does not heal; it helps to forget. After being hurt, it does take time to heal, but even the passage of hours, days, months, and even years does not ensure that you will be okay. If time cures all wounds, why are there so many grumpy elderly people? The only thing that can heal wounds is making wise decisions about how to treat them. Time doesn't stick broken bones together, but deliberate, careful efforts can.

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#15

Love Comes When You Least Expect It

Love Comes When You Least Expect It

It's romantic to imagine that the love of your life will appear before you at a coffee shop or that you will lock eyes as they hold the door open for you. In reality, this ideal might be troublesome. Love is not a supernatural emotion that appears at random. People don't automatically fall in love. It is based on commitment, connections, and effort. Thus, believing love appears out of the blue is just romantic nonsense.

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Doctor Strange
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Nothing happens unless you make it happen. I had a friend who believed this nonsense of love will come when you aren't looking. He kept waiting. And waiting. And waiting. He waited for TEN YEARS. When did he finally meet the girl he would marry? When he finally listened to me and went out there and made it happen.

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#16

Just Avoid Fighting With Them

Just Avoid Fighting With Them

It is unhealthy to clench your teeth whenever you argue with your significant other. Thus, rather than remaining silent, switch up your fighting style. Every couple argues, but healthy couples argue respectfully, which is the difference. They make changes to guarantee the relationship's health by using disputes (and learning from them) to better understand one another.

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Erowid Ebontide
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You can always agree to disagree, but if you're more focused on winning the argument then ending it your just antagonizing your partner. Which leads to losing them.

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#17

Your Perfect Match Is Out There

Your Perfect Match Is Out There

There's no such thing as the "perfect" match, so if they seem too good to be true — they probably are. Everybody has flaws. It's often just a matter of time before these imperfections come to the surface. Ultimately, if you feel with your heart and soul that someone is worth sticking around, that they are good for you, you will have to learn to take the bad with the good. Still, the 'good' should significantly outweigh the 'bad.'

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#18

You Can Do Better

You Can Do Better

Although your family and friends usually mean well when they advise you, there are instances when it might be more damaging than beneficial. If you envision spending the rest of your life with your current S/O, hearing that you can do better than your current partner might make you feel nervous and unsupported. Although they shouldn't have to approve of your companion, your friends, and family should be supportive and able to communicate with you. You must make it clear to everyone that respect should be maintained no matter what.

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Ouching Tiger Limping Dragon
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My family thought that my husband wasn't a good choice when we were teens. He has changed their minds 100% with his dedication and maturity. They now say that he's the best choice I could have made, and he takes great care of me ^-^

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#19

Chemistry Means You've Found "The One"

Chemistry Means You've Found "The One"

Everyone wants to experience the thrill of love and attraction, but you can't solely count on the butterflies for that. The brain can play tricks on us, sending an electric jolt to the body and convincing us, "yes, this is the one!" However, chemistry can overrule common sense and keep us with someone who isn't good for us. It doesn't matter if the person has the traits you find attractive or seek in your potential partner. It won't work if they don't respond to your needs for an emotional bond. Sorry, butterflies, you can no longer be trusted.

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#20

Forgive And Forget

Forgive And Forget

There is no need for forgetting and forgiving to go hand in hand. In fact, it's preferable to keep the two apart. A successful relationship depends on forgiveness, but forgetting is unnecessary. Better advice is to forgive and move on. Essentially, not forgetting about it helps not to repeat the same mistake; hence, learn from it. To quote Paulo Coelho, "Forgiving changes the perspectives. Forgetting loses the lesson."

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#21

It's A Good Sign If You Don't Argue

It's A Good Sign If You Don't Argue

You would assume that the absence of arguments indicates everything is going well in a relationship, but that may not always be true. If a couple doesn't argue, they're probably not communicating enough. It is normal for arguments to arise since no two individuals have the same opinions on things. If there are no arguments in a relationship, many things are likely being left unsaid. If both partners' needs are not fulfilled in a relationship, they soon abandon it like rats leaving a sinking ship.

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#22

Your Appearance Doesn't Matter As Much Once You're Married

Your Appearance Doesn't Matter As Much Once You're Married

Similar to a first date, at the start of the relationship, we are acting all perfect because we want to show our potential partner that we are amazing and have lots of great qualities. Why, then, do people let themselves go after marriage? Although it's a trope, it is true and happens frequently. Simply said, people no longer care as much. When a couple becomes overly at ease and begins to take their S/O for granted, issues and resentment start to arise. Efforts shouldn't end once a wedding ring is involved. Period.

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KBT
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Also important to remember that people's appearance will change as we age and that is ok.

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#23

Look For A Partner Who Loves Everything You Do

Look For A Partner Who Loves Everything You Do

Having someone who shares your passions may seem like all you could ask for. Nevertheless, often there's more than meets the eye in these "we like the same things" -kinds of relationships. It's wonderful to share mutual interests, but if you meet someone who suddenly appears to "assimilate" all your interests, for example, listens to the same music (very rare), their favorite sports team is, you guessed it, also the one that you like, and their favorite animal is, what a coincidence, also a panda, they might be a little co-dependent — a sign of a dysfunctional relationship and unhealthy attachment.

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Mintii Bunnii
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

its nice to have a partner w different interests, that way they can introduce you to new things and vice versa

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#24

Let Them Make The First Move

Let Them Make The First Move

Waiting for someone else to take the initiative will often leave you doing just that — anxiously waiting. Making the first move might be intimidating, but you'll be surprised how much this can enhance your dating life. More than anything, success favors the bold. Also, what's the worst that can happen? Them leaving you on "seen"? If so, you just dodged a bullet, my friend.

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#25

Soulmates Exist

Soulmates Exist

While the idea that each person has their special someone is oh-so-romantic, it is ultimately untrue. How many times have you heard someone claim to have met their soulmate? Surely more than you can remember immediately. If you wait just a few years (sometimes months), you could see them meet another soulmate after the previous one has vanished into the dark abyss. Although we certainly have stronger and deeper connections with some people, we can love and fall in love with more than one person. Love won't be equal among lovers, but it will still be love.

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Trash Panda 🦝
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I do believe in soulmates. I also believe that, in the most sincerest of ironies, you don't always wind up spending your life with your soulmate.

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#26

Never Go To Bed Angry

Never Go To Bed Angry

We often say things we don't always mean when things become heated. It's actually recommended to take some time to unwind before talking about something that made you upset. If you allow it some time to cool off as you sleep on it, whatever it is will probably not look like as big of a deal in the morning. However, try to gather the words and let your partner know that you'd rather continue the conversation in the morning, especially if your partner is prone to overthinking.

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#27

If You Fall Out Of Love, You Should Just Get Divorced

If You Fall Out Of Love, You Should Just Get Divorced

The truth is that falling in love is just a trick nature uses to force people into a relationship so they can have children. Due to the transient nature of "falling in love," the trick eventually wears off. The ecstatic lovingness that characterized the experience fades, but this does not imply that we stop loving the other person. Once the Honeymoon Phase is over, you can tell if your relationship is solid if you can handle one another in the most trying circumstances which arise later in the relationship.

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Danish Susanne
Community Member
8 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My personal experience was that I fell in love with my late husband again and again. It wat not something that went on without breaks.

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#28

Get Hitched In Your 20s For A Long, Happy Marriage

Get Hitched In Your 20s For A Long, Happy Marriage

Contrary to popular belief, getting married in your 20s is not always a good idea. Spend some time getting to know yourself before entering a marriage intended to last forever. Because who you are in your 20s will not be who you will be in your 30s or 40s. Also, let's be fair but honest, it's better (also cheaper) to wait and get married once than to gather your whole family to celebrate yet another "soulmate." You are not missing out on anything if you don't start a family in your 20s. Relax.

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Demosthenes
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

All good advice except that the prime childbearing years for a woman peak at 26 and birth defects + risk to mommy increases every year after. That is some actual science and not someone’s opinion on Reddit.

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#29

The Best Way To Get Over Someone Is To Get On Someone Else

The Best Way To Get Over Someone Is To Get On Someone Else

No, it’s not. You’ll simply end up in rebound hell. If you jump immediately on someone else, you don’t have the chance or time to digest your feelings following the breakup. Ignoring pain doesn’t make it go away. Also, you risk repeating your mistakes in your following relationships if you don’t take the time to reflect on why the old relationship ended.

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#30

If They Can't Handle You At Your Worst, They Don't Deserve You At Your Best

If They Can't Handle You At Your Worst, They Don't Deserve You At Your Best

This phrase makes it to the list of things annoying people often say. If it's just the beginning of your relationship or you are still just dating, why should they? Why should the other person deal with your issues? Everyone who lives by this attitude seems to be drawn to drama like a magnet yet is baffled as to why. It's a lousy excuse people use to justify their lousy behavior.

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Doctor Strange
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I hate this phrase so much. People use it to justify being terrible people and never improving themselves, because everyone should just deal with them at their worst.

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#31

Lie A Little When It Comes To How Many People You've Slept With

Lie A Little When It Comes To How Many People You've Slept With

Because they fear their new partner will reject or criticize them, many are embarrassed to mention how many people they've slept with during previous relationships. Yet, being truthful is always the best course of action. Any relationship intended to last is based on two essential principles: trust and respect. You can only achieve these by being open and honest about everything, including your sexual past.

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Yuffa Kinazzo
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Whaaaaaa????? Why would anyone ask such a question? Or be expected to answer. Ridiculous!

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#32

If You Don't Like Them On The First Date, Give Them Another Chance

If You Don't Like Them On The First Date, Give Them Another Chance

Although first dates can be intimidating, don't be scared to trust your first impressions. Dating can be time-consuming and tiring. Use the time to meet someone new instead. Go with your gut feeling; if it doesn't feel right, it probably isn't. 

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#33

Don't Put All Your Eggs In One Basket

Don't Put All Your Eggs In One Basket

At the early stages of dating, while it's not "locked in" or "official," — sure, why not. However, this guidance, often from friends and relatives, presents serious issues for couples who take their relationship seriously and see their future together. This frequently pushes them to subconsciously plan for their relationship to end. What it truly accomplishes is highlighting the relationship's trust gaps and fears. With one foot in and one foot out, who can truly create a happy home?

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Danish Susanne
Community Member
8 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This advice is good if you are investing money, not if you think of investing in a relationship.

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#34

Age Is Just A Number

Age Is Just A Number

Yes, there are partnerships with age differences that work out perfectly well, and it's also true that your age matters less as you age. And yet, age still matters, and research claims that couples who are closer in age tend to be happier. How big of an age gap is too big? Although there's no set number of years, there's a generally agreed-upon equation: To determine if someone is too young for you to date, divide your age in half and add seven; to determine if someone is too old for you to date, subtract seven from your age and multiply it by two.

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Xenon
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Multiply what by two? According to the last instruction I shouldn't date a 106 yo 😂

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#35

Better Communication Is The Key To Wedded Bliss

Better Communication Is The Key To Wedded Bliss

Just because you understand that "communication is key" doesn't guarantee that every interaction will be trouble-free. John Gottman, a renowned relationship expert, identified four signs of a failing relationship that could predict divorce with a 93 percent accuracy rate. These are known as "The Four Horsemen" and include criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. These communication styles are likely to be used at some time in every relationship. So essentially, unhealthy communication patterns are no better than no communication at all.

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#36

A Comfortable Life Is Worth A Lackluster Relationship

A Comfortable Life Is Worth A Lackluster Relationship

Never stay with someone just for the sake of money. Most relationships end due to poor communication and money-related problems. An affluent person does not necessarily possess the other attributes of a partner you seek.

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#37

The Secret To A Happy Marriage Is Compromise

The Secret To A Happy Marriage Is Compromise

Negotiating compromises is effective for countries or political parties but NOT for relationships. To put it another way, it's equivalent to stating, "I'm prepared to endure some disappointment and grief as long as the person I love most in this world suffers, too." You should pursue "third options" instead. At that point, you both let go of your original suggestions and work together to find a third choice that brings you both at least as much joy as your initial suggestions.

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#38

It's Better To Keep Your Finances Separate

It's Better To Keep Your Finances Separate

Naturally, keep your bank accounts separate while you're just dating or starting a relationship. However, suppose you're married or in a committed long-term relationship. In that case, the best approach is to work together and have open discussions about how you'll use the money as a team. Separate accounts that the other person can't access, or worse, isn't even aware of, can seed distrust in the relationship, which is really hard to repair.

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Amy S
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'd advise to always have an account just you can access in case your partner dies unexpectedly because any account with their name on is frozen and the surviving partner cannot access any of the money until it's gone through probate etc.

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#39

Give Them More Time, They'll Propose Eventually

Give Them More Time, They'll Propose Eventually

They might. Alternatively, they might not. Nobody has any way of knowing what another person will do. If you want to stay together even when the relationship isn't moving forward as fast as you'd like, you must be able to accept the repercussions if you commit too many years of your life to a relationship that does not progress.

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OnlyMe
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If you want a proposal and not getting one, make the proposal yourself.

#40

Your Partner Will Work Less Once You're Married

Your Partner Will Work Less Once You're Married

Hardly ever is this the case. Undoubtedly, marriage alters your life, but it doesn't change who you are as a person. Your partner will likely continue to be a workaholic after you get married if they were one before you got married. Similarly, if your partner didn't have a job before you got married, they might not be looking for one after.

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#41

Don't Let Them Treat You That Way

Don't Let Them Treat You That Way

Family and friends don't recognize your role in a tango of dysfunctional relationships. Those who know and love you tend to think of you as the victim, but you may be just as responsible as your partner for the conflicts in your relationship. Always consider your part first.

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#42

Always Trust Your Friends When It Comes To Your Relationship

Always Trust Your Friends When It Comes To Your Relationship

Often, it comes down to the fact that a friend is merely projecting their own views onto you since they simply wouldn't pick a love partner like yours. Hence, instead of taking their comments at face value, uncover the precise source of your friend's disapproval and go from there.

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Danish Susanne
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8 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If a friend is talking about a red flag in your relationship, think about if it is, or is it just that friends opinion that you don't share.

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#43

Always Date Down

Always Date Down

Some believe that if you date someone less successful or less conventionally attractive than you, they will treat you better. FALSE. Dating down just increases the likelihood of future problems. Most, if not all, relationships eventually reach a stage where one or both partners start to pull things apart and look for reasons why they shouldn't be together.

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#44

When You Know, You Know

When You Know, You Know

While there is some truth to this ambiguous advice, the problem is that it encourages individuals to seek intense emotions, which can cause them to fall victim to the honeymoon period’s infatuation when it’s, in fact, simply too early to tell.

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#45

Always Communicate Your Needs

Always Communicate Your Needs

Sure thing, you should inform your partner if you need or require something! However, it's about how you communicate your needs: do you insist your partner must fulfill them, or do you ask whether they can help you fulfill them? Any relationship would benefit significantly if instead of saying, "I need this" or "I need you to do this," we learned to ask for help, which can also be in the form of asking the person to give you attention. Such phrasing of words really makes a huge difference in the relationship.

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#46

Find Out Where They Stand On Marriage, Kids, And Commitment Straight Away

Find Out Where They Stand On Marriage, Kids, And Commitment Straight Away

It’s tempting to learn where someone stands regarding marriage, kids, and a relationship as soon as possible, since we have no time to waste. However, on the first date (or first 3), it might not be the best idea to question whether a new acquaintance is prepared for a commitment. Absolutely, it’s important to find out where a possible partner stands, but asking them too many questions immediately may lead to an increased sense of pressure and fast transform a first date into something akin to an awkward job interview.

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KBT
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1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Nope, don't care, I am absolutely asking on the first date. Don't waste my time.

#47

The Person Who Earns The Most Should Always Pick Up The Tab

The Person Who Earns The Most Should Always Pick Up The Tab

There's this idea that the one who makes more money should always cover the cost of each date. No matter how much more money your partner makes, it typically doesn't make sense to expect one person to pay for the dates each time. Unless your partner can actually (and honestly) allow themselves to spoil you with everything-is-paid-for dates, discuss a "date budget" and how you two can afford it or who pays for what or when. 

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Danish Susanne
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8 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Also if you expect the other to pay every time, he/she may come to believe that is why you want to date him/her.

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#48

You Should Get Married

You Should Get Married

If you have a loving partner and a strong relationship, even if it's not in your collective interest, many family members and friends will urge you to get married. However, "if it ain't broke, don't fix it." Some people believe that it is unnecessary to complicate a happy and joyful relationship with legal ramifications and a ceremony. It's definitely not. 

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#49

Each Partner Should Do Their Fair Share

Each Partner Should Do Their Fair Share

We are accustomed to the idea of the fair division of domestic and emotional "duties" in a partnership or marriage. However, getting bogged down in the details of ensuring everything is equal might be more effort than it's worth. No couple can equitably divide the emotional work of a relationship or those unpleasant chores. There is no need to, either. Stop focusing on who does what; people in love give freely because it feels good, not because they are commanded to.

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KBT
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wrong. ALWAYS analyze who is doing more domestic labour, especially if both partners are working outside the home. This attitude of "don't even think about it 💖🌸" only benefits males because overwhelmingly women are the ones pulling more domestic/emotional labour in a relationship.

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#50

Living Together Is A Great Way To Test The Waters For The Future

Living Together Is A Great Way To Test The Waters For The Future

If you heed this advice, you might think that these teeny bumps on the road you experience moving in together indicate your relationship is pretty much doomed. However, very few couples are lucky to have a smooth move-in experience, so it's not all accurate. Healthy, happy couples develop their relationship skills by resolving minor obstacles first to prepare for the bigger ones that might (they definitely will) arise later in their communal living.

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