24 Things People Actually Put In Writing That Should’ve Just Stayed In Their Thoughts

To find out when leaving a note to someone is a good idea and when it isn’t, as well as how to sound nice in writing or when it is better to talk face-to-face, Bored Panda reached out to Beth Collier, a communication, creativity, & leadership consultant.

When asked whether leaving a note to your neighbors about something that you don't like is the way to go, Beth said that it depends on the situation.

“A face-to-face conversation can be preferable, as you can get more information (and possibly a resolution) faster from a conversation.” She explained: “For example, your neighbor may not realize that their music is loud or that their barking dog is bothering you, and you might be able to resolve this situation quickly through a short conversation.”

On the other hand, the leadership consultant argues, “if you leave a note instead, your neighbor may interpret your message more critically, and may respond more negatively as a result.”

Beth says that if you don't feel safe or comfortable speaking to the neighbor, then it's OK to write a note, “just choose your words carefully."

In order not to sound passive-aggressive in a note that could potentially aggravate the situation, Beth’s advice is to “be polite, explain the situation, and look for a solution together. Your neighbor may be inconsiderate, but they may not know there is even an issue.”

Beth argues that it’s best to “write the note like an adult speaking to another adult - not like a parent speaking to a naughty child. Keep your message short and simple - but be clear about what the issue is, and what you want.”

"If you know the neighbor and have a decent relationship with them, it can be easier (and faster) to speak to them face-to-face. When you talk to someone face-to-face, it is easier to communicate your tone and meaning than it is in writing,” Beth explained.

She also reminds readers to think about timing if you approach them (e.g. you might want to avoid meal times, or late at night/first thing in the morning). “And don't approach them when you're angry."