Woman Asks Why A Guy She Turned Down Didn’t Try Harder, Gets The Perfect Response
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A guy invites a girl on a date, tries all of his best moves, but she says no. A guy has to move on. Otherwise, it’s harassment. Unless it isn’t? Recently, a girl surprised the internet when she posted a stupid question on Quora, asking why her date wasn’t a mind reader and didn’t pursue her after a negative answer about a first date.
She wrote, “A guy asked me out today, and I told him “no,” but I wanted him to try harder. Why didn’t he try again?” Naturally, a question like this deserves something more than a simple answer, but a comeback that’s written in the same language. Luckily, Ron Rule typed a response the inquirer should’ve understood. Scroll down to check out what he wrote!
After this word exchange the relationship advice and dumbest questions to ask poured like rain, demasking the silly games girls try to play with unsuspecting guys sometimes.
Someone surprised Quora with a strange question
Luckily, this guy responded with an example the inquirer had to understand
Amused by the exchange, people started sharing their own experiences
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I think any guy who goes out with a girl who plays these kinds of games is in for a rough time. No one is worth that kind of crazy.
Guys play games too. It's called being passive aggressive. I wish everyone would just say what they mean.
And mean what they say!
"Because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind."? o.o
It's not being passive-aggressive, it's just bad communication. Passive-aggressive usually means that you're being negative in a downplayed way. Like leaving a colouring page onto someone's windshield when they've done a bad parking job, to help them "keep within the lines". It gets the reproach across. Saying no when you mean yes is just... idiotic.
That's one example of being passive aggressive but not the most common in relationships. It's more like they constantly "forget" to do something you asked them because they want to get back at you, or expect you to know why they are mad without them explaining to you, or using sarcasm to make a point instead of just saying the direct truth. It's basically the inability or unwillingness to communicate directly.
But that was not a relationship. It was two individuals, one said the exact opposite of what they wanted, which is not, by definition, passive-aggressive. I'm not saying passive-aggressive doesn't happen in relationships, I'm saying that what she did was not, actually, passive-aggressive.
Lol, I just want to add that I had this experience as a woman with my ex, so yeah, guys do this too, maybe less often since they're taught to be more direct than women, but it exists. I hate that passive aggressive bullshit
Being passive aggressive simply means you're downplaying your emotions. Flat out telling someone the complete opposite of what you want is playing MIND GAMES.
We play games because YOU make us. trust me if you let it be simple we'd be happy.
Well, when men say what they mean, women get butt-hurt and start World War III. A woman is willing to fight for hours, while the children are being neglected and the house is a mess (because women are emotionally-driven). A man will evaluate the situation and decide that there is no point wasting that kind of time, only to discover that nothing will change by the time the argument is over (since men are more logically-driven).
You sir are 100% correct.. At least for a lot of women..
Logically driven or not is entirely cultural.
Juana, you confuse passive aggressiveness with someone not wanting to be your servant.
Haha maybe. But why not just come out and say "No, I don't want to do that." Instead it's games.
They love you when you're alone and ignore you when you're not.
Women do transference, too. It's called the above post.
When Men do say what we mean, you Women don't believe, or being needy, and pull away from us? Relationship Sabotage!
Yep guys play so many damn games or whe they are evasive about what they want and lead you in for a year in a half or say little saddle hunts that clearly mean something then when you bring it up they change the subject or walk away from you
Passive Aggressiveness is the bane of my existence. My ex boyfriend used to do that all the time. I would say "Where do you want to go to eat?" He would say "Oh, I don't care...Anywhere is fine"...."Are you SURE?" "Yes, Anywhere is fine"....I would say "Alright" and go to Red Robin.....30 min in and him picking at his plate I would say "What's wrong" and it would always be "Well, I really wanted to go to TGI-Fridays, Why didn't you pick that?" OOoooOOoooOoooOOOOooo How I spent over a year with that turd is beyond me.
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Juana, that would take away all of the excitement from the game of "Catch me if you can". :D
The terrible, dangerous idea that a guy should try harder when a woman says no is the very worst thing that has come out of the vast majority of romantic movies. Kudos to the guy for not insisting. I can't imagine trying to start any sort of relationship with someone who can't seem to communicate appropriately.
Thank you Laury for saying this so clearly. It has bugged me for a long time, but I had trouble putting it into words.
The late John Glenn got his wife by being relentless with her shy self. But nowadays, that gets you thrown into the same hellhole where murderers and rapists linger. Looking for a wife has become too dangerous these days. The risk heavily outweighs the reward now.
I'd almost feel sorry if you hadn't just complained about 'not being able to harass a shy woman into committing to you legally' in the same breath as dismissing women for being afraid of being raped and murdered. You think your risk of potentially being branded a predator outweighs the risk of women being actually raped and murdered? You're out of touch with reality, dude.
Of course, the chances of him being branded a predator is far greater than the chances of you being raped. Not everyone who's branded a predator actually is you know. Women can lie, just the same as men can.
I think any guy who goes out with a girl who plays these kinds of games is in for a rough time. No one is worth that kind of crazy.
Guys play games too. It's called being passive aggressive. I wish everyone would just say what they mean.
And mean what they say!
"Because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind."? o.o
It's not being passive-aggressive, it's just bad communication. Passive-aggressive usually means that you're being negative in a downplayed way. Like leaving a colouring page onto someone's windshield when they've done a bad parking job, to help them "keep within the lines". It gets the reproach across. Saying no when you mean yes is just... idiotic.
That's one example of being passive aggressive but not the most common in relationships. It's more like they constantly "forget" to do something you asked them because they want to get back at you, or expect you to know why they are mad without them explaining to you, or using sarcasm to make a point instead of just saying the direct truth. It's basically the inability or unwillingness to communicate directly.
But that was not a relationship. It was two individuals, one said the exact opposite of what they wanted, which is not, by definition, passive-aggressive. I'm not saying passive-aggressive doesn't happen in relationships, I'm saying that what she did was not, actually, passive-aggressive.
Lol, I just want to add that I had this experience as a woman with my ex, so yeah, guys do this too, maybe less often since they're taught to be more direct than women, but it exists. I hate that passive aggressive bullshit
Being passive aggressive simply means you're downplaying your emotions. Flat out telling someone the complete opposite of what you want is playing MIND GAMES.
We play games because YOU make us. trust me if you let it be simple we'd be happy.
Well, when men say what they mean, women get butt-hurt and start World War III. A woman is willing to fight for hours, while the children are being neglected and the house is a mess (because women are emotionally-driven). A man will evaluate the situation and decide that there is no point wasting that kind of time, only to discover that nothing will change by the time the argument is over (since men are more logically-driven).
You sir are 100% correct.. At least for a lot of women..
Logically driven or not is entirely cultural.
Juana, you confuse passive aggressiveness with someone not wanting to be your servant.
Haha maybe. But why not just come out and say "No, I don't want to do that." Instead it's games.
They love you when you're alone and ignore you when you're not.
Women do transference, too. It's called the above post.
When Men do say what we mean, you Women don't believe, or being needy, and pull away from us? Relationship Sabotage!
Yep guys play so many damn games or whe they are evasive about what they want and lead you in for a year in a half or say little saddle hunts that clearly mean something then when you bring it up they change the subject or walk away from you
Passive Aggressiveness is the bane of my existence. My ex boyfriend used to do that all the time. I would say "Where do you want to go to eat?" He would say "Oh, I don't care...Anywhere is fine"...."Are you SURE?" "Yes, Anywhere is fine"....I would say "Alright" and go to Red Robin.....30 min in and him picking at his plate I would say "What's wrong" and it would always be "Well, I really wanted to go to TGI-Fridays, Why didn't you pick that?" OOoooOOoooOoooOOOOooo How I spent over a year with that turd is beyond me.
This comment is hidden. Click here to view.
Juana, that would take away all of the excitement from the game of "Catch me if you can". :D
The terrible, dangerous idea that a guy should try harder when a woman says no is the very worst thing that has come out of the vast majority of romantic movies. Kudos to the guy for not insisting. I can't imagine trying to start any sort of relationship with someone who can't seem to communicate appropriately.
Thank you Laury for saying this so clearly. It has bugged me for a long time, but I had trouble putting it into words.
The late John Glenn got his wife by being relentless with her shy self. But nowadays, that gets you thrown into the same hellhole where murderers and rapists linger. Looking for a wife has become too dangerous these days. The risk heavily outweighs the reward now.
I'd almost feel sorry if you hadn't just complained about 'not being able to harass a shy woman into committing to you legally' in the same breath as dismissing women for being afraid of being raped and murdered. You think your risk of potentially being branded a predator outweighs the risk of women being actually raped and murdered? You're out of touch with reality, dude.
Of course, the chances of him being branded a predator is far greater than the chances of you being raped. Not everyone who's branded a predator actually is you know. Women can lie, just the same as men can.