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Everybody knows that you don't make 911 calls unless you've got an emergency, right? Well, not entirely, because as you can see from this funny if not an infuriatingly dumb list of funny 911 calls operators have received, some people have a pretty bizarre idea of what exactly constitutes an emergency.
From the woman who thought her washing machine was possessed by the devil to the person who urgently needed to know whether it was legal for them to own a monkey, the emergency calls below will make you laugh, and maybe cry a little. Then you'll realize just how dumb some people can be and how unbelievable their short stories are.
Still, some of these conversations might be prank calls, but we don't think that pranking an emergency station is worth the fine and lawsuit that comes with it, as every call is being tracked for caller ID.
Anyways, don't forget to check the funny stories that we've found on calling in for an emergency below.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
Not an operator, but my boyfriend who called in. He usually worked a late shift, walking home about 2 am. This shift he got off work a few hours late... BF: I'd like to call and report a fire. [We live in a fire prone area and it was the season.] 911: Where is it located sir? BF: On the hillside just East of [City]. 911: Can you be more specific? [Typing away in the background.] BF: Yes, [gives a more detailed location]. Oh god, it's getting bigger! The whole top of the hill is on fire now! 911: Stay calm sir, we're sending somebody out. BF: It's getting bigger! Doesn't anybody else see this?! It's lighting up the sky around it...it's huge! Oh god! Oh...oh, wait... 911: Sir? BF: I am SO sorry...I'm not usually out this time of night, I just got off work late...that's, that's the sun... 911: ... BF: I am so, so sorry for wasting your time, there is no fire, that's just the sun rising. Never mind. I'm really embarrassed... 911: That's fine, Sir. I will cancel the call, thank you for calling.
Chyppa Homer 8 years ago
Simple. He`s a vampire, and never saw it before. ...or after I guess :)
RELATED:
#2
Had another woman call saying her cat was stuck in a tree. I just knew she wanted the fire department to come save the cat, so I got my "that's only in movies/TV" speech ready. Then she said "...so my husband climbed up to get the cat and now he's stuck too."
AnnieLaurie Burke 8 years ago
And she probably trimmed his nails so he has no traction on the bark.
Load More Replies... Ladislav Pollo 8 years ago
...and then I climbed up to get the cat and my husband and Im stuck too.... I call you from tree, please save us!
Erin Zelnio 8 years ago
I called the fire department directly when my cat pulled this trick, and they provided me with the number of an arborist who makes money on the side doing this.
Marie-Louise Chenois 8 years ago
She phone because she wants a legal way to save the cat AND leave her husband in the tree...
Hamlets twin 8 years ago
""no, no, no! just the cat. yeah leave him up there"
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#3
A quite pregnant (don't remember exactly how far along, but definitely past 30 weeks) woman calls to say that her doctor told her to refrain from having sex for the rest of the pregnancy and she didn't understand why. I looked at her file, and saw she was having pre-term contractions, so I explained that sexual activity can cause contractions, so it was safer to abstain so the baby could stay inside as long as possible. She tearfully exclaims, "But how will I feed the baby?!?" Me: "I'm sorry, ma'am, could you repeat that?" Patient: "How will I feed the baby if I can't have sex?!?" The patient was convinced that her baby was living off of her boyfriend's semen, and that it would starve if they stopped having sex. I explained about the umbilical cord, etc. but she refused to believe me until I asked her about single moms, lesbian moms, etc. and asked how she though their babies fed and grew. After a moment of silence, she thanked me, and started to hang up the phone, but not before I heard her screaming her boyfriends name. That man had a good thing going for a while there. I honestly wasn't sure if I felt more sorry for him, or a baby growing up in that household.
Hans 8 years ago
Wow...this reminds me of the British couple where she told him their baby was coloured because she ate so much liquorice during pregnancy. Both mother and father had a very light skin tone. Whoever disregards sexual education in schools, needs to read such stories...
Adriana E. Henricy 8 years ago
definetly feel more sorry for her, he took advantage of her ignorace so he could have sex whenever he wanted.
RaroaRaroa 8 years ago
That's just sad for the future of the child. Clearly she'd become pregnant with no consideration for what it involved, was not attending ante-natal classes, or talking to a midwife, or even read a book about it. Otherwise she would have figured this out long before.
Allana Rose 8 years ago
Some people are so clueless they should not be allowed to reproduce. This is a prime example!
Peggy Jakopak 8 years ago
I find that I can't put thoughts into words for this, because I want to believe that nobody could be this stupid, but obviously they can.
#4
Just after I got cut loose from training, I received a priority one (meaning immediate response) animal ordinance call. Usually, this call is reserved for animals in traffic or vicious animals, where there is the potential for immediate threat to life. The reporting party was a parent attending a school function. Caller advised there was a raccoon loose in the school. I dispatched two officers to the call and they made it on scene. The officer then broadcasts the "suspect" description via radio. "Suspect is small, fast, and wearing a bandit mask. May have robbed a couple of trash cans. We lost him in a foot pursuit."
X Gacha X Goddess X YT 5 years ago
red panda looks like raccon in a fire fighter suit. pauses-the...44b695.jpg 
X Gacha X Goddess X YT 5 years ago
did you go? I would've called animal conrtrol if i were you. <img src="data:image/jpeg;base64,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
#5
Not a 911 operator, but I do work for a kids helpline. I recently got a call from a panicked 11-year-old boy who thought he had locked himself in a wardrobe while home alone. I was on the phone with him for a while before I suggested sliding the door instead of pushing it out like you would when entering or exiting a room. I heard a few sniffles on the other end of the line and then a quiet "Oh yeah, I forgot the door went like that."
Frederick Seaborne 5 years ago (edited)
Back in the early '70's, my kindergarten teacher forcibly held the door shut one time when I was trying to re-enter the classroom from the bathroom. I still don't know why she did that --- maybe she was trying to "toughen me up" or something, since I was always so scared and shy at that age. Naturally, it didn't help me in the confidence department one bit --- all it did, of course, was cause me to start screaming in terror and pounding frantically on the door, much to the teacher's annoyance and embarrassment. She evidently had ever expected such a hysterical response from me.
Sebastian Melmoth 8 years ago
does this remind anyone of that FarSide comic? school for the genius kids and he's pushing on a pull door
Raven DeathShade 3 years ago
I didn't think of that, but it makes sense XD.
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Nuniek Widiayani 8 years ago
Good thing that the boy brought phone before he got in to the wardrobe
#6
One woman called because she thought her house was being shot at. Turns out she forgot about her eggs boiling on the stove and they exploded. I wanted to give her a hug though, she was just a little old lady.
N Elizabeth Johansen 5 years ago
Reminds me of a person at work who thought they could hard boil an egg in the microwave. It literally blew the door open.
BBsayshi CN 6 years ago
How about this that somebody told me. When I went to a restaurant I order frog legs. After a while, the waiter came back and said "I am sorry mam but the only frog legs we had got over fried so it exploded."
#7
A woman dialled 999 to say there were men in her house trying to take her away. The men in question were police officers who had come to arrest her
LizzyM 8 years ago
Emergency numbers are 112 for most of Europe, 999 for UK and 911 for North America (yes, there's a whole new world outside the US - we have different measurements, country codes, emergency numbers and all!)
Load More Replies... LizzyM 8 years ago
Emergency numbers are 112 for most of Europe, 999 for UK and 911 for North America (yes, there's a whole new world outside the US - we have different measurements, country codes, emergency numbers and all!)
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#8
Me: 911, where do you need assistance? Drunk guy: At the convenient store. This guy won't sell me beer. Me: Ok, why not? Drunk guy: I can't show him my ID because I am not 21. Me: Without an ID the clerk can not sell to you, especially if you are under age. Drunk Guy: But other clerks let me bribe them before. I told him that and he still won't take my bribe and sell to me. Make him take the bribe! Me: We won't force the clerk to accept your bribe. And definitely won't let him sell to a minor. Do you want to wait there and I can have an officer come talk to you in person? Drunk Guy: Yea, I will sit outside and wait for you.
Mistrz Varflock 8 years ago
I had a similiar experience yesterday... I was standing on a sidewalk talking with a group of people when some dude on a bike almost rode over one of them (there was a lot of space, we didn't block him or anything). Instead of simply saing sorry he started talking c**p and called the police. Now he has to pay a fine because he shouldn't even be riding on a sidewalk and more importantly trying to force his way through. He was really surprised he can be considered guilty when he's the one who called for police...
Hamlets twin 8 years ago
Hopefully he'll be able to bribe the cop to bribe the clerk to sell him beer.
Swarf 8 years ago
"Why am I getting arrested? HE'S the one who won't take my bribe!"
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#9
The best story I have is a guy who called about a bobcat in front of the library. He called up out of breath and said there was a wild cat intimidating people so they could not enter or exit the building. I was fairly close so I started to run over. I asked if anyone was injured and he said no. I was expecting a group of people held up at the entrance by a huge cat hissing at everyone. I told him to keep away from it and stay on the line. When I got there I found a tabby cat perched on a bench. I verified the caller and the cat he called about. I went over to the cat with him and started pet him, he rolled over and let me scratch his belly. The guy was shocked and said "oh, someone has domesticated it."
Hamlets twin 8 years ago
If only there was a way he could look up different types of cats in some sort of book. He may have been able to see which ones were dangerous.
#10
One guy called FRANTICALLY saying that he saw the dead body of a young woman, early 20s, wearing nothing but shorts. He gave a detailed description, hair color, skin color, body position, the whole bit and said she was by the side of the interstate (in the middle of an affluent suburban area at rush hour) so we figured this had to be a really fresh crime scene. We started scrambling together officers to get there ASAP, a big hassle considering it's rush hour and they're all dealing with accidents and stuff like that. On top of that, we can't say what the issue is on the radio is because we have too many busibodies who monitor police radio, then call us to try to get juicy details, or othewise meddle. So we have to get these officers to their cars to read the computer, leaving other issues, etc. And these are suburban cops in the Midwest, a murder is a damn big deal. The guy calls back a few minutes later. "Uh, I checked again, it's a dead deer." Peeved, I announce on the radio that the trip is cancelled, "it was a deer". An officer sarcastically calls back: "With shorts on?"
Mistrz Varflock 8 years ago
Well, deers can have white butts so it might look a bit like they wear shorts... I guess the ladies he met weren't exactly beautiful if he manage to mistake a deer for one.
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Neeraj Jha 8 years ago
Had it been a Spotted Deer, he would have said that the body has Polka dotted top on.
#11
"911, what is the address of the emergency?" "I need an ambulance" "What's going on?" "I just, I need an ambulance" "Can you tell me why?" "My dick is stuck in the wall OKAY?!" "Please stay on the line for Fire/Rescue"
Hans 8 years ago
On the other hand: I saw a statistics on how many people come to ER with things stuck in various body openings...according to the statistic, all of them claimed their surprisingly were naked and stumbling and right fell onto the objects. Luckily, as the medics further investigated, they had also spilled lubricant before which miracplously hit the objects before they "fell".
Janine Randall 8 years ago
Saw a "Real ER" story. Guy was horny so he stuck his little guy in a campstove. How horny do you have to be? Also he was extremely high.
Brianna Bastian 8 years ago
I think I might have seen that or one very similar
Load More Replies... Allana Rose 8 years ago
Some men will stick their, ahem, privates into any thing that even remotely resembles a woman's privates. Are they really that desperate or is it just terribly horny??!!
Adriana E. Henricy 8 years ago
well, that saying about they will stick it in any hole bears true for some
#12
My uncle was a dispatcher in a suburb of Minneapolis/St.Paul, and would tell me stories whenever I saw him. My favorite goes like this: Uncle: 911, what's your emergency? Caller: Yes, I'd like to report two suspicious vehicles passing something back and forth in Potawatomi park. Uncle: Ok, we'll send an officer out to assess. Uncle: Dispatch to car 45, two suspicious vehicles in Potawatomi park, passing items back and forth. Car 45: Uhhh...car 45 to dispatch, that's me and Officer Somethingerother, passing Cheetos... Uncle: 10-4
Mike Chin 8 years ago
Maybe they bought the giant costco sized bag to save money
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Vaida Kuodytė 8 years ago
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=10-4
Load More Replies... #13
One of my personal favorites was someone who called and it went like this: "I know this is not an emergency, but there is a person in a giant monkey suit running down the road humping all the fire hydrants" I had to hold back my laughing as best I could - turns out he was right, when I sent the police there there was a kid in a monkey costume humping every hydrant he came across.
Lara B. 8 years ago
Good on the one who called for realising, that it was not actually an emergency :D
Alia Gail 8 years ago
Oh no that is most definitely an emergency. Can't have monkeys humping our fire hydrants. They might need a S.W.A.T. team.
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MeghanB 8 years ago
Ok, not an emergency, but on the other hand- -who DO you call when someone in a monkey suit is humping fire hydrants? There's not exactly a hot hotline for that.
Christine McKechnie 8 years ago
Cops generally have a non-emergency number to call.
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Hamlets twin 8 years ago
I don't want to get all up in the poster's monkey business, but is this a crime?
#14
Long story short. Helped a little girl do her math homework.
Ellie Ripps 2 years ago
Let me guess went something like this. Dispatcher: what's 2+5? Little girl: 17
#15
I'm not a dispatcher, but back in my EMS days I was dispatched on a call of a child being poisoned. Upon our arrival we find a 14 year old male and his mother. The mother was insisting we take them to the hospital so he could have his stomach pumped because he had swallowed chewing gum. The child was looking at us as if to say, "I'm sorry my mother is crazy." One year later, same address, same family, called for poisoning. Upon arrival we find the same kid and mother. The mother wanted to be taken to the hospital because the kid had admitted to his mother that he had taken a hit of marijuana when he was visiting friends the week before. The kid had the same look on his face.
logical fallacy 8 years ago
This has nothing to do with being young, it's crazy.
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Anita Wolf 8 years ago
He's very likely stopped talking to her altogether, somewhere along the line
Melody Reid 8 years ago
If this is what it took to get his mom to the hospital, then it was a good thing. She obviously needed help.
Saltypepper 4 days ago
I knew someone who had a mother like that freaked out in a panic over the smallest thing called 911 because she found irth control in her room convinced it was d***s
PandaPandaPanda 8 years ago
Damn i feel sorry for this dude... Something tell me the mother is a teacher
Jeanne Crosby 8 years ago
I can't believe no one intervened. Clearly the mother was unstable. Like a messed up version of Manchussen's (sp?) as if that isn't messed up in its own right.
#16
I've had someone call 911 to wish me a merry xmas when I was working at 3am on on Christmas Morning.
#17
Paramedic here, Once we had a young woman call 911 around 2am saying that her legs were turning blue. Turns out she had worn a new pair of jeans to the club that night.
Hans 8 years ago
Haha, I guess this has happened to many. Can look quite scarry in dimmed light!
Linda Gulley 8 years ago
Why would it look like she had scars? She was probably scared, though. She should have washed them before wearing. Always wash before wearing.
Load More Replies... Intensive Panda 8 years ago
I buyed blue bed sheets from china once and was completely blue like an avatar the next morning 😂🙈
Cassie 8 years ago
Don't people wash their new clothes before wearing them? That usually sets the color. Is it just weird that I always wash new clothes before wearing them? I don't know where they've been!!
Quan Ly 8 years ago
No, people might try clothes on in the dressing room and return them.
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Kirstin TransGirl 3 years ago
My dad has a simular er visit While he never called 911 he went to the er because his feet were turning black The nurse took a rag and cleaned his feet Turns out it was cause he got new socks
Anna Drahná 8 years ago
I once wore a new pair of jeans on an 8 hour flight. When I went to the toilet, I noticed my legs were getting blue, then my palms. I was convinced that I'm dying, got my mother panicked too and she was almost about to call for the flight attendant but then I noticed the napkin i wiped my hands with was blue too. Moral of the story - don't buy cheap pants.
#18
Guy who called to swear out a complaint against his roommate because the guy stole his heroin. Yes, they both got a ride.
Mack 8 years ago
If he is stupid enough to use heroin he might be also stupid enough to make such call :P
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Lee Howard 7 years ago
This really happens. Man calls in to report his wife stole his drugs and he still has to pay for them. Cops show up, he shows them where they were hidden. Wife admits to stealing the pills, and selling them to A, the crack to B, the heroin to C, and the meth to D for twice the amount husband was going to sell them to E,F,G and H. Man is mad because he still owes I and J. Both go to jail. Within 24 hours, A thru J get raided. Biggest drug ring take down in town's history.
Allana Rose 8 years ago
I've heard the same type of stories so many times before. Some nut calls up police to complain someone stole his stash. I guess it's true, doing drugs really does kill off your brain cells! (not weed tho, that fixes everything :)
Marcus D. Potter 2 years ago
Sounds like a candidate for World's Craziest Fools. Mr. T would certainly pity da fool. :D
#19
Someone called 911 about a "machine gun mounted on a car". It was the Google maps car...
Kori K. Warriner 8 years ago
Hahaha! I can actually see the misunderstanding though. The Google maps car might look like that to some less-technologically savvy people.
Swarf 8 years ago
I'm sorry, but no. That's Grade A idiocy.- I went to see a play with my wife and there was a woman a few seats away from us having a minor meltdown about the forced air AC vent under her seat. She was like "well, it could be dangerous! You never know these days!" Yes. Yes you do know. We have become a nation of heypersensitive, knee-jerk pants wetting ninnies ripe for takeover by the nearest strongman dictator.
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Daniel Losinger 8 years ago
I actually followed a Google Maps car down a street in a midwestern city. Sometime later I found photos of my car on that street on Google Maps.
Gigi Aure 8 years ago
my boyfriend and I were driving around our city one evening and this elderly gentleman was riding around in like a 50s war jeep looking thing with a big a*s machine gun on the back....please excuse my choice of words I know nothing about the military or their weapons lmao
#20
Me: "911. What is the address of your emergency?" Caller: "Turtles...in Georgia" M: "Yes, ma'am. Turtles are an indigenous species to the state of Georgia." C: "Really?" M: "Yes, ma'am." C: "Huh. Well what do you do when there is one in your yard?" M: "Leave it alone." C: "It's driving my dogs crazy!" M: "Is the turtle endangering your dogs?" C: "No." M: "Are the dogs endangering the turtle?" C: "No. They're on the other side of the fence." M: "Well then just leave the turtle alone and he'll go along on his merry turtle way." C: "Ok. I guess so."
#21
One time, some guy called 911 because he had multiple women in his bed that he didn't know and who refused to leave.
John Backus 8 years ago
I think I know this guy and his name is Tommy H#### he will tell this story to anyone who will listen .....
Marcus D. Potter 3 years ago
It would be hilarious if it turns out he went into the wrong house. :D
Allana Rose 8 years ago
Now this irks me. I really want to know how he ended up with "multiple" women in his bed in the first place and why he wanted them to leave! *L*
#22
One woman called saying that every time she went outside the frogs said mmm pussy.
Kirstin TransGirl 3 years ago
Yes those frogs need to serve hard time for that
Load More Replies... Janice Foster 8 years ago
What did she expect the police to do about it? Charge the frogs with profanity?!
Hamlets twin 8 years ago
There are a couple of kids in the bushes almost dying of laughter every time she goes back inside
#23
A friend who used to be a police operator once told me she had a hysterical call from a Chinese lady, who was unintelligible but clearly distressed. They sent an officer round, apparently she'd found a hedgehog in her garden and had no f*cking clue what it was - assumed it was an alien or something and freaked out.
Naima Ivansdóttir 8 years ago
hey i'm on this one. i had to explain two of my neighbbours (from different households and at different times!) what a hedgehog is.
Susann Campbell 8 years ago
Neighbor from the far East scream and I went to find out the problem, she said there was a giant rat in her garden. I looked it was a possum .
#24
Caller: A deer just swam across the river behind my house. Me: Okay? Caller: Well I am worried it might be cold. Me:.......Well there is nothing we can do about a deer being cold. Didn't it run off after swinning the river? Caller: Yes. Me: Well ma'am it's a wild animal and I'd guess it's going to be fine. Caller: ok
Hans 8 years ago
The empathy is nice, but it is appaling how much many people are disconnected from nature. I guess the same people also do not think a moment when they buy a cheap steak where it could possibly have come from.
Daria B 8 years ago
Steak is just steak, it comes from the kitchen. Also, I dunno why they keep calling tuna a tuna "fish" when it's clearly a can.... (Sarcasm of course)
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Doreen McCarthy 8 years ago
My cousin has a farm. A woman called him to yell at him because his horse was out in a snow storm. She was all, why don't you go get him, he's probably cold etc. my cousin said, he's a horse. What do you think they did for thousands of years before people used them. Besides he knows where the barn is. She kept yelling at him and he finally hung up on her. She called the police who just laughed.
Katrin Faridani 8 years ago
This could be my husband. He cares about all animals and worries they may be cold. ❤️
Tracey Tait 8 years ago
Idiots pick up baby animals all the time cuz they think mama abandoned them or they are cold. Remember the guys in Yellowstone that picked up the Bison calf that later died?
#25
"911, what's your emergency?" "THERE IS A GODDAMN ROCK ON MY LAWN. A ROCK." "Um... A rock?" "DID YOU NOT F*CKING HEAR ME? THERE IS A ROCK ON MY LAWN. SOMEONE DID THIS ON PURPOSE. A GODDAMN ROCK IN MY LAWN. I HAD TO DRIVE AROUND IT ON MY LAWNMOWER. A GODDAMN ROCK." "What's your address?" "You're f*cking 911 and you don't know my goddamn address? What the f*ck are my taxes paying you for? F*cking useless. Goddamn rock." "Sir, what is your address?" "LOOK AT ME ON GOOGLE EARTH YOU CAN SEE ME BECAUSE THERES A GODDAMN ROCK IN MY LAWN!" At this point, the map finally correlated with his location and he was in the next county. I let them deal with it. I don't know how it turned out.
Hans 8 years ago
"Sir, I got not a rock, but a god damn idiot on the line – I still do not scream."
Luna Kittenwarrior 8 years ago
There's something called a "hand"... you have one. USE IT TO MOVIE THE ROCK.
Zori the degu 8 years ago
Bet the person who put the rock there was a pissed neighbor who has to deal with him every day!
5 years ago
"Sir I'm going to had you to your country's 911 because I cant handle you and your ROCK, have a good day :)"
#26
My mom is a 911 operator, she gets some insanely stupid calls. I remember a few years ago, there was a huge pileup involving several cars and fatalities. Clearly it caused miles of traffic. A woman called 911, insisting that she get escorted out of the traffic by a trooper, because she "had to get home", and it was "ridiculous that she should be stuck like that". Like, people are dead, lady, sorry you're not gonna make it home for Jeopardy.
Brownie emoji 8 years ago
When I first read your comment I thought it said "arrowglance" and I was so confused
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Marco Andreas 8 years ago
This Reminds me of that one time, a person commited suicide by throwing themselfs under the train I was in. While we were walking towards the front of the train to transition to the substitute train, I overheard a guy in 1st class say "I hope they made sure, there's enough space in 1st class" All I thought was, "a human being just ended its life and all you're worrying about is your comfort for the rest of your commute to work?!" Disgusting.
Allana Rose 8 years ago
Very selfish woman felt entitled for some stupid reason. She needs a good reality slap in the face!
Elizabeth Molloy 8 years ago
There are a lot of self-important over-entitled people out there. So sad.
Merte Edenflower 7 years ago
next time, send a car there, you guys must have some law about caling 911 unneeded or something... fine her, then drive away
#27
Got a call from a man that someone vandalized his snowman.
Zori the degu 8 years ago
I'd like to call someone because my branch shelters constantly get vandalized, but I'm not so mad.
Marcus D. Potter 3 years ago
A woman called 999 (911) in the UK for the Police as someone stole her snowman. :D
#28
"I want to report an attempt murder. I asked them not to put mushrooms on my pizza, as I'm allergic and they forgot, so it's attempted murder"
Hans 8 years ago
I guess under some law systems it might even be something like gross negligence, but on the other hand, mushrooms happily are large enough to see...
Mary Kavanagh 8 years ago
Except if there's a tiny piece you can't see. I'm allergic to mussels, so chowder with mussels is out for me. I can avoid the whole mussels in the chowder but I can't guarantee that there mightn't be tiny pieces that got shaved off if they've been taken out of their shells.
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Tiggy Darling 8 years ago
A fast food shop owner in Britain got sent to prison for 6 years recently for killing a customer. That was ground peanuts.
Judy Semmens 8 years ago
Three weeks earlier another customer of his who had a peanut allergy ended up in hospital after eating one of his meals. So it wasn't an isolated incident. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-36360111
Load More Replies... Lilly griffith 8 years ago
A situation like this happened to my friend. Except she handled it better while she actually had a severe allergic reaction. At school
Hamlets twin 8 years ago
If you are that allergic, then you just don't eat pizza you didn't prepare. People like this are why on a bag of peanuts they have to label it with "may contain nuts".
#29
6:30 Christmas morning. 9-1-1 goes off. "9-1-1. what's your emergency?" Breathless, panicky voice "How do I get the cranberry sauce out of the can without it coming out in chunks?" "Open the other end and slide it out on a plate." "OH! THANK YOU! You are brilliant!" I wasn't considered so brilliant once I had to dispatch an officer over there to educate her on proper 9-1-1 usage. Merry Christmas, here's your citation. source: 4 years as 9-1-1 dispatcher/supervisor in rural Alaska
Neurotic_Octopus 8 years ago
Likely true, but also I'm guessing based on "rural Alaska" that she may not have had a decent internet connection
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Eulalie Grace 8 years ago
You'd hope that anyone living in rural Alaska would be a bit more creative when dealing with "problems"
Sharon Hahn 8 years ago
My neighbor would do this. She calls the police and fire department for everything she can't do!
Hans 8 years ago
Admittedly, sending an officer out on Christmas was probably a bit of an overreaction, the needless call notwithstanding.
Lynn Donovan 8 years ago
I just read a novel about a woman working as a 911 dispatcher and she said that sending an officer was mandatory for every call they received. It was a novel so I will be careful with that piece of information, but it seems to me that she was obligated to do so.
Load More Replies... #30
Entitled rich brat demanding an officer drive her back home because she spent her travel money partying; she felt since her father was a well-known surgeon, and a "higher taxpayer" she should get a break and get a ride. I told her no and hung up on her.
Hans 8 years ago
Giving her a ride with locked back-doors would probably have been the right "medicine"
Mary Kavanagh 8 years ago
And maybe some nice sccommodation in a police ststion for a few hours for wasting police time!
Load More Replies... Saltypepper 4 days ago
Hive her a ride with the bracelets behind her back put her in a cage for a few hrs teach her untitled vrat a*s a lesson
Kirstin TransGirl 3 years ago
You should have given her a ride just not to home to the county jail instead
ethel 8 years ago
My grandpa was a cop. My aunt, his daughter, used to think it was hilarious when he'd drive her to school in the squad car and drop her off in front of everyone. It really wasn't, she got a terrible reputation. Didn't help that she looked and dressed like a mod Scandanavian dancing queen.
Eulalie Grace 8 years ago
I would have given her a ride home, and made sure Daddy came out to retrieve his idiot offspring from the locked back seat. Let her do the explaining ...
Allana Rose 8 years ago
I would have picked her up put her in the back of the cop car and taken her in for a night in the drunk tank. Obv. she "must have been drinking" WINK!
#31
I have been in the 911 biz for over 22 years. If a caller starts the call with "I swear I'm not crazy" then you need to buckle up for some insanity. A guy started a call with those words after escaping from his apartment and running to the closest 7-11. He swore that his roommates were turning into giant crabs. The was going to show the officers that they were currently in giant cocoons transforming. As you might expect he was tripping balls.
Luna Kittenwarrior 8 years ago
It's well-known as a slushie store, and it also sell junk food, snacks, and sandwiches
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#32
Also had one a couple of years ago where a dad called to ask for an ambulance because his 17 yr old daughter had a candle stuck up her anus. He tried to explain that she said she had gotten out of the shower and slipped and fell "butthole first" onto the candle... Medics said they found KY jelly with the candle so I think we all know what was going on there.
Kim Lorton 8 years ago
Daddy! Daddy! I fell on a candle! Well, get off of it then! I can't daddy it went up my a*s! I am really trying to figure out why, she'd tell her dad this, and not hide the ky jelly!! I have to go change my pants now! I peed them laughing too hard! 🤣🤣🤣😂🤣😂🤣
Leni 8 years ago
Well the jelly is a clear give away but did no one wonder what a candle was doing in the shower
M O'Connell 8 years ago
That's actually the problem. KY is water-soluble, and paraffin is a rather sticky material. Once the lube was gone, it did not want to come out!
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Tracey Tait 8 years ago
See it in the ER all the time. Sex toys are safe cuz they are for that purpose and can be easily and anonymously purchased online people. Maybe we could start having PSA's about this, lol
#33
Guy calling to argue that his crystal meth is legal because he made it with store-brought products with his own hard-earned money.
Eulalie Grace 8 years ago
Sadly, most likely, by manufacturing and selling.
Load More Replies... Marcus D. Potter 2 years ago
Should've sent an officer around to take him to jail. I'm sure the Judge would love to hear all about his legal loophole. :D
#34
Caller: I’ve been poisoned. Me: Ok, we’re sending an ambulance. Tell me what happened. Caller: I’ve overdosed Me: What did you take? Caller: Pot Me: Marijuana? Caller: Yes. I’m dying. Please hurry. Turns out. She was just super high.
Hans 8 years ago
Frankly, if you do drugs but still be sane enough to call 911 when you overdid it, it probably is the first step to get clean!
Haunting Spirit 8 years ago
Clean? Pot isn't addictive. Alcohol is. Alcohol is actually the worst "drug". Yet it is socially accepted. And yes, I do drink alcohol too.
Load More Replies... Helen Burgess 8 years ago
sounds like a pretty bad panic attack. i've had those while stoned before (many strains can help with anxiety, others exacerbate it).
Amber Medina 8 years ago
My cousin went to the er with chest pains after smoking. Apparently he had a panic attack so severe that he was close to cardiac arrest. It would've been his second one had he not gone in. He was laying on the table with the monitors going crazy, and the dr kept telling him to relax. They finally had to give him a relaxant, and the dr chuckled saying that maybe his weed was a little too good. It can happen.
#35
Got a call from a guy wanting the police to come to his address because the guy he sold a bag of weed to wouldn't pay him Gave me his name, address and date of birth and the name, address and phone number of the other guy as well. Both got a visit from unit soon afterwards.
#36
Caller: My boyfriend took my dog! Me: And why'd he do that? Caller: Because he's an asshole! Me: No, I mean what possessed him to take the animal? Caller: Cause he's a f*cker! Me: ...... Why does he have the dog... Caller: Cause he's a piece of shit! Me: ......... Alright, I'll send an officer out to talk to you.
Eulalie Grace 8 years ago
Too funny. I'd have a very hard time not losing it, as long as the dog was OK :)
Tony Bowman 3 years ago
Honestly I would be too pissed to talk too if someone took my pet,so I'm 50/50 on this one
Heather Talma 3 years ago
I mean, what other reason were they asking for? Some people do things just to be a**holes.
#37
Had a guy call asking if it was legal to shoot his neighbor because his hedges were hanging over his property and he considered it tresspassing.
Hans 8 years ago
I know some US states have these "stay your ground" laws, but thinking that you can legally harm (let alone shoot!) someone for merely trespassing, without posing any danger, is ridiculous.
Shana 8 years ago
Just as silly as the laws here... you pretty much have to let them get in and trespass, take your stuff, threaten you AND let him hurt you first, before you can legally defend yourself... -_-
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RaroaRaroa 8 years ago
If anything it was the hedge that was trespassing, not the neighbour, so at best he could only shoot the hedge. Failing that, trim the damn thing.
Robert Bailey 8 years ago
So he's unhappy about the hedge. But if the neighbor came over to trip it, he'd be trespassing. Some people just confuse me.
M O'Connell 8 years ago
Well, the choice of action was a bit drastic. Around here, you have the right to trim vegetation hanging over your property, even if it is rooted on the other side of the line.
#38
"I'd like to report a suspicious man, the only description I can give is he is turkish / middle eastern" Me: "What is he doing that's suspicious?" Them: "Walking down my street."
Kori K. Warriner 8 years ago
Ridiculous. Those people who are so quick to be suspicious of someone simply because of the color of their skin. That's why America (assuming it is America, since it is so grossly prevalent here...and if not, my point is still valid for U.S.) is looked down upon by the rest of the world. I hope other countries realize that the idiots who are acting so ridiculous are not representative of the rest of the country.
Adriana E. Henricy 8 years ago
And this is happening more and more: people "walking suspiciously" down the street, why? bc they "look mexican/middle eastern/wear a hijab"
Steve Bowman 8 years ago
That could happen in West Germany as well. In East Germany they would lynch him right away.
Вера Деме 8 years ago
My brother is a Bulgarian who lives in that part of Germany. When unshaven she looks like a "dark Balkan subject" as we say, just quite dark skinned and hairy. People look at him with fear. Whenever he travels and passed German borders he was triple checked. It was annoying!!! I definitely think there is a serious racism in there. The ridiculous thing is that my brother likes order and is so strict in following all the rules. And is an extremly calm person with huge sense of humor.
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#39
I had someone a few months ago call 911 to ask if a tablespoon was the big spoon or the little one.
Sill Marien 8 years ago
That may have been a legitimate question (well I live in a country where thay are called small spoon and big spoon) just not for 911 ;)
#40
Me: 911, Whats your emergency? Lady: My smoke detector is going off, and I think there is a HAZMAT GOING ON! Me: Is there fire or smoke in your home? Lady: No Me: Is it chirping? Maybe it's a low battery sound? Lady: No! Me: Did you damage the detector at all? Lady: NO!!! I took it off the ceiling, unplugged the hard wires and took out the battery....It's still alarming! Me: Ma'am how is that possible? You are telling me that it it's alarming with no power source...? And what were you mentioning about a Hazmat? Lady: UGH!!!! THE NUCLEAR POWER SOURCE, DO TO MERCURY INJECTION FROM THE POWER PLANT IN THIS DETECTOR, IS MAKING THIS THING GO OFF! IT WONT STOP! HEAR! HAVE A LISTEN! Me: ....(hears no sound but her heavy breathing).... Lady: I WANT TO TALK TO THE KING NUCLEAR EMPORER HOMER SIMPSON OF SPRINGFIELD. Me: ...(Holds mic away from face laughs uncontrollably)... Lady: HELLO!? SIR!? ARE YOU LISTENING?!?! Me: Yes ma'am, total emergency, the Fire Department is on the way to help assist you... Night shift at 911 always got the best calls.
Susan Gardner 8 years ago
Me too, like wtf. If she is serious, it is NOT funny dudes
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Robert Morson 8 years ago
Smoke detectors often have backup batteries that you can't physically remove. I once had a malfunctioning smoke detector that I could not turn off for exactly this reason. Ended up having to hide it in the bottom of a clothes drawer to muffle the sound until the backup battery died. I did not, however, attempt to contact Homer Simpson, because I was not high at the time.
Tracey Tait 8 years ago
Yeah, laugh at the lady terrified because a mental illness us causing frightening hallucinations/delusions. Way to show compassion/empathy asshat.
Marcus D. Potter 2 years ago
To be fair this was probably a reasonable enough call, although not involving a Hazmat incident. Ionisation detectors contain radioactive material by their very design, which she probably thought meant a nuclear power source. As for the alarm continuing to go off, this was likely due to the detector having its own power store. The reason that this seemed reasonable enough is that it could have been going off due to a fire. Not all fires are obvious, especially not when you're asleep.
Andy Drake 3 years ago
To be fair smoke detectors do have a tiny amount of radioactive material in them. Not harmful but I can see how reading the warning while investigating the incessantly beeping detector might upset someone who, for whatever reason(s) is a few cards short of a whole deck.
#41
Mine: an aggressive goose at a city park that was chasing people and biting them on the butt. So literally a goose trying to goose people.
#42
Had a drunk person call to report he was being harassed. Truth was..... He was being arrested by our officers for throwing pizza at people. All I heard in the background was one of my officers saying to him "that better not be our dispatcher on the phone" followed by some muffled talking and my officer taking the phone and saying "he will be taking a ride with us now" and hung up.
lasagna's underrated 8 years ago
Pizza toss, an extreme sport rarely perfected.
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Luna Kittenwarrior 8 years ago
Throwing pizza isn't a valid reason for arrest to me lol.. it actually sounds kinda fun, and also free pizza for them!
#43
A lady called 911 and asked if I could tell the fire department to pick up a fire and move it a mile or two north so the smoke wouldn't blow into their housing community.
Cassie 8 years ago
This reminds me of the lady who called our state's department of transportation to tell them that they put the deer crossing in a terrible place and they should have the deer cross at a safer location.
Jacque Martinez 1 year ago
I actually heard about that one on K Love radio
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Random Panda 8 years ago
Nearly spit coffee on my phone, laughing too hard at this. How do people like that even get through daily life? :O
egracec 8 years ago
I had something similar. I was working at a grocery store in aa resort town and there was a wildfire that started that morning and I watched it burn down towards town all day. A lady came through my line and said that this was her first time in town and was the smoke gonna clear soon because she wanted to go out on the lake. Before I could reply a fire spotter plane buzzed the power lines just out front.
#44
Caller: I need an am-ba-lance. Me: What are you needing the ambulance for tonight? Caller: I need the am-ba-lance to come out and give me a pregnancy test. Me: Well, they don't carry that kind of equipment on board. If you are wanting to have them come get you and take you to the hospital to test you they could. Caller: I'm not going to the hospital. I want the am-ba-lance to come give me the test. Me: Well, we don't carry those tests on our ambulances, they could only take you to the hospi.... Caller: YOU AREN'T LISTENING TO ME! I AM NOT GOING TO THE DAMN HOSPITAL. THE AM-BA-LANCE NEEDS TO COME OUT AND GIVE ME THE TEST! Me: I don't think you are hearing me, we don't have that equipment on board. Why don't you try going to popular drugstore and just pick up the test there? Caller: They sell those there? How much are they?
RaroaRaroa 8 years ago
If only you had to apply to get a prescription pill to get pregnant, rather than a pill to avoid it. Imagine what the world might be like.
John Leite 2 years ago
Test thing at the pharmacy would be a whole lot cheaper than an "am-ba-lance"
Marcus D. Potter 3 years ago
Should've just passed the matter to the Police and sent them out to deal with her.
Susan Gardner 8 years ago
Really, this is outrageous. Just the fact that he was going to send an ambulance to TAKE her to the hospital for a f'ing pregnancy test. And we wonder where our tax dollars go. SMH
#45
I just cut off my penis, and I'm going to flush it down the toilet before you get here! (He did.)
Wyndmere 8 years ago
I'd hate to be the person monitoring clean up at the water treatment plant. : (
#46
The funniest non crazy stories was a really rich and affluent guy who lived in a huge house called about a disheveled looking suv at the bottom of his huge driveway and it wasn't the gardener's or housekeeping. The cop had to run the tags and it turns out it belonged to his daughter and he had bought it for her.
#47
Because an Arab man had sent her a friend request on Facebook and she wondered if we had a terrorism task force that should know about it.
Lorelai Purvis 4 years ago
yeah... why would anyone do this kind of thing...
Load More Replies... Allie Orona 8 years ago
Judge someone not by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character. Honestly, people. It's not rocket science. It's being an adequate human being, rather than a piece of s**t.
Mary Hodges-Cates 7 years ago
Had a similar experience myself. But the man was a big drug dealer and was trying to track me down to outfit his crew/rent snow shoes and cold weather gear so he and his minions could go out into the winter wilderness and find three bales of uncut cocane dropped in the wrong place. No one at BP believed me and neither did the state police. Later that day one of the drug traffickers died of hypothermia and two others went to prison, one was never seen again when he took off into the wilderness and the big wig keeps coming back to the area looking for his dope. Weird part is he is still in my facebook friends and follows me.
#48
I don't know if its the dumbest call but one time we had a hostage situation. There was a helicopter in the area circling for several hours. We get nosey neighbor calls wanting to know whats going on, can't give out any info just tell them to stay inside. So I answer another call, asking about the helicopter. Roll my eyes and give the same speech, the girl asked "but is the helicopter ok? Why does it keep going in circles like that?" She thought they were going to crash land.
#49
"What's your emergency?" "MY CAT JUST SCRATCHED ME!!" "Is it a serious wound? are you bleeding?" "No, but it really hurt!"
Joseph Eriksson 8 years ago
That's Officer Boo-Boo to you, thank you very much.
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lasagna's underrated 8 years ago
Snakes are very nice and easy to handle (if they're domesticated).
Load More Replies... Helen Burgess 8 years ago
if caller is a woman, i'd definitely NOT recommend natural childbirth.
#50
To say they called the regular line and that girl they talked to wasn't very helpful (dude it's still me).
#51
My dad worked as a dispatcher in the Netherlands, got a call from a man who was clearly very distressed, crying, asking for help. My dad, being professional, stayed calm and asked what the cause for the distress was: "Ajax have lost again..." For those not familiar with football/soccer - Ajax is a Dutch football team.
Marcus D. Potter 2 years ago
What does he expect the Politie to do, arrest the opposing team? Should've instead given him an in person warning that continuing to do that could result in arrest.
Sean Katz 8 years ago
Worked for EMS in Germany for 6 years. during the Soccer World Cup: Hardly anybody called during games. Before the games people called saying the doctor had to come BEFORE the game! And once, after Italy lost against Germany, an Italian family called. The father got up from his armchair after the game, took a wrong turn and ran into the wall. He was unconscious.
#52
A domestic abuse call, guy playing GTA 5 was severely pissed his wife wouldn't stop chasing him down and killing him IN GAME. His wife was bigger than him or i'm sure it would have been the real deal.
#53
Hello? How do you baste a turkey? This is 911, ma'am, what is the nature of your emergency? I need to know how to baste a turkey! Basically you spoon the drippings back onto the top to help keep it moist. Why did you call 911 to ask that? Well, you knew, didn't you?
Joseph Eriksson 8 years ago
What is this guuu-gol you're all talking about? I'm using a stone tablet and chisel to write this reply.
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Brigitte 8 years ago
My sister once worked in customer service for a daily newspaper. A lot of times people called to ask fo the number of a doctor/shop/department... After a while she just googled the number herself because telling these people that's not her job and to call an operator usually took much longer.
Marcus D. Potter 3 years ago
Shouldn't have bothered, should've told him to hang up and call 311.
Oliver Gloxin 8 years ago
You should be able to charge these dumbasses for the call and the hassle they cause.
Joseph Eriksson 8 years ago
I'm sure the Turkey would tell you the recipe, if he wasn't already... hrm... cold.
Load More Replies... #54
We had an old woman call in and say there was two guys dress in blue trying to break in her house and rape her. So we send about 6 cops over to her house. It turns out it was the gas company reading her gas meter.
TC 8 years ago
I can imagine the confusion...but how could she ever know they intended to rape her ?
Luca 8 years ago
Perhaps the technological vocabulary they used sounded like euphemism for sex?
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Marcus D. Potter 2 years ago
Then again were they actually trying to break in? I could understand if she didn't believe their claims.
#55
I worked on 9/11. I had people call 911 for weeks after because there were "3 brown guys in a car and I thought you should know about it."
#PugLife 8 years ago
That is one of the most RACIST sentences that I have ever heard in my life!
oron61 7 years ago
Give the loser a break. If you weren't too bright, live in a town with no brown guys, see on TV about brown guys murdering Americans indiscriminately, then see more brown guys, you're gonna be scared, too.
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Maggie Grover Bacher 8 years ago
so sad. i can't imagine the absolute panic and terror of everyone at that time. those poor "brown guys" that were probably getting harassed all the time as well.
Judy Semmens 8 years ago
"Were"? Unfortunately there's still a lot of panic, terror, suspicion and harassment.
Load More Replies... #56
We had an Amber Alert go out; guy stabbed the mother of his children and took the kids. Man calls to complain that the Alert is interrupting his TV and that the father should be left alone because he's doing a good thing to be with his kids.
Allie Orona 8 years ago
that sort of thing is just... not even sad. not even pathetic. not even selfish. i don't have words.
Susann Campbell 8 years ago
I hope a car was sent to him to check this guy and maybe his kid out.
Heather Talma 3 years ago
This must have been a while ago. I thought they only go to phones now.
Thị Ngọc Hảo Lê 7 years ago
Yeah a kid is in danger but we are so sorry you can't watch your f*****g game.
Load More Replies... #57
A woman who had seen a clown in London selling balloons for £5 each, which was much more than other clowns were charging
Stephanie 2 years ago
omg i was literally going to say pennywise is that you.
Load More Replies... Marcus D. Potter 2 years ago
Should've warned the caller that continuing would lead to arrest.
Lilly griffith 8 years ago
Ugh. Someone trying to make no ey and make kids laugh. How inconsiderate and terrible
#58
Not me but a family member who was a dispatcher for 20+ years: Someone called in because a kid (5-6 or so) had somehow gotten locked inside a newspaper box- you know, the kind with a window on the front that lets you see the front page. One of the responders spent a bit of time wondering aloud how they were going to break the "window" on the box without harming the kid. After a minute or two of this, a different responder put forth the suggestion that perhaps they should try inserting a couple of quarters first. It worked. Box opened, kid got out and was fine, and no paper boxes were harmed.
Heather Evans 4 years ago
Between the caller and the officers, NO ONE thought of using quarters first???
Saltypepper 4 days ago
Why the hell did mom not think of this and why the hell did it take so long to figure it out
Marcus D. Potter 3 years ago
To be fair, this is a valid call. A child was trapped in a box. The answer wasn't obvious.
#59
I was a 911 operator for a year, been in EMS 10 years. Lady called because her cat killer her roommates bird and there was blood and feathers everywhere. She wanted someone to come out and clean it up. She wouldn't stop calling and eventually got arrested for 911 abuse.
Hans 8 years ago
Probably sending help for a psychological condition would have been more appropriate.
Intensive Panda 8 years ago
this psychological condition is called being dumb, if you'd arrest all dumb people, cities would be empty
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Marcus D. Potter 2 years ago
Could've hired a decent cleaning company with the bondsman's fee alone. :D
#60
Man called and asked us if we could dispatch police to his home for assistance. He explains relationship problems so we think domestic. Officers roll over and respond Come across approx 15 mins later. Headquarters, 423 Go ahead Male requested we break up with his girlfriend for him. We explained to him that we would not. 10-08 Fkn idiot.
Zenozenobee 8 years ago
irony: the expression of one's meaning by using language that normally signifies the opposite, typically for humorous or emphatic effect.
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Allie Orona 8 years ago
Dude... if you're not mature enough to break up with them, you're not mature enough to date them. I get that maybe you care a lot, but still.
#61
Last week, we took a call of 8 ufo's above a house. They were stars.
Wulfur 8 years ago
It's impossible to have a UFO because if you identify it as an unidentified flying object it's no longer unidentified
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Susann Campbell 8 years ago
Wow no clouds or smog and saw the real sky at night for the first time?
#62
A stolen TV remote. Fyi, it wasn't stolen just fell between the couch cushions
Juliana Souza 8 years ago
In many places they're cited or fined under misuse of emergency services
Load More Replies... #63
Woman calling to ask where she can get a paternity test done. For herself. I was confused and asked her, to clarify, if she was needing to determine who the father of a child was, she'd have to maybe contact a clinic. No. She wanted to know how can she find out if she was the mother of someone who claimed she gave birth to them. No mental illness, no hysterical pregnancy, she was just dumb.
troufaki13 8 years ago
Maybe she gave the baby up for adoption years ago and wanted to find out if it's hers?
Joseph Eriksson 8 years ago
Finding out that her 'pater' was an empty fish bowl only took a minute...
Heart Maverick 8 years ago
Giving a baby up for adoption or having had her baby kidnapped are the 2 main legitimate excuses for this. There's a cpuple more, but it's more complicated with each of those, if she hasn't given birth at all, I would say then,,yes she's dumb.
#64
A caller dialled 999 at 04:00 on a Saturday morning and asked: "Where is the best place to get a bacon sandwich right now?"
Susann Campbell 8 years ago
Apply a bacon sandwich to the inside of your stomach to stop the ulcer from bleeding while on the way to the hospital. Sounds like an emergency call to me.
Marcus D. Potter 2 years ago
Should've sent an officer to issue a warning about misuse of the 999 system.
#65
Caller: "I want to file charges against my granddaughters dog." Operator: "Why sir, what did the dog do?" Caller: "Well, I think the dog has been molesting her." Operator: "Ok just tell me what happened." Caller: "Well I opened the bathroom door last time I was at my son's house. His daughter is 6 years old and was on the floor, the dog was...licking her in her privates." Operator(trying not to laugh): "Sir, are you sure that the dog is the suspect or the victim? It is just a dumb animal, it sounds to me like your grand daughter was taking advantage of it. Either way, I don't think it's something the police can handle, I can give you the number for animal control if you want?" Caller: "You know what, you have a point..." Operator: "Yes, a 6 year old is definitely more mentally aware than a dog. You should talk to her parents about it, not involve the police." Caller: "Oh ok, thanks buddy! Bye!"
OdangaUsagi 8 years ago
If a 6-year-old is doing this, then someone else has molested her. A 6-year-old doesn't think about sexual stimulation.
BamesJond 8 years ago
Although it's her private parts, on that age it doesn't have to be sexually. That's an adult assumption. Kids are curious about all the bits and bobs and it could very well be an innocent curious thing.
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TheLoneWanderer 7 years ago
I read all the comments and now I'm just uncomfortable *curls into a safety ball*
TheLoneWanderer 7 years ago
Seriously *curls into a tighter safety ball* why did the conversation go so far
Load More Replies... Susann Campbell 8 years ago
When I was little I like sitting on the drain in the tub while the water was going down, it was an interesting feeling.
Patrick Bateman 8 years ago
Seems to me that he was saying that the dog was just a stupid dog and didn't know enough to not be "taken advantage of" by a 6 year old. What's the big deal? So the guy called a dog dumb. Probably not the mute kind of dumb either. Its just a dog. Relax.
Load More Replies... #66
Had a lady trying to call an ambulance because she opened a package from Amazon at home and she was afraid that that her kid was about to have a major allergic reaction... From the packing Peanuts.... because the kid was allergic to peanuts, and when her kid mentioned what they were called, she freaked out.
Maggie Grover Bacher 8 years ago
it's been said before but: google. please people, there is more to education than the 3 r's. basic common sense
Tracey Tait 8 years ago
I have always wondered why it is called "common sense" when it is far from common, it is in fact rather rare.
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Elizabeth Molloy 8 years ago
You have GOT to be pulling my chain!! How does someone that stupid reach adulthood?
Susann Campbell 8 years ago
Dumb mother but really scared to death mother with a jokester rotten kid probably laughing in the back ground.
Heart Maverick 8 years ago
Common sense is not common at all. I got that from a fortune cookie, it thinks of people as needing to learn to Google, which they were originally poems not fortunes.the fortunes popularized it in America, so it was probably A westerner who wrote that, I'm a westerner actually, well I'm making a point, someone here knows to put that in a something people read as a joke, and trying to prevent assumptions common on the Internet.
#67
"My washing machine is telling me to file for bankruptcy." This was a confused elderly lady so it was actually a little sad, but I'm including it because it left me completely speechless at the time. I think my response was, "I... you... what?"
Amalia Chrismer 8 years ago
I'm going to Hell for laughing at this, aren't I?
Load More Replies... Susann Campbell 8 years ago
Machines makes sounds, some with high and low sounds coming from them and if you are in the other room it may sound like a word being said. Then the mind can trick you into thinking that it is talking and it is saying the same thing over and over and the more you listen to it it becomes more clear. Sounds will take an old person to the Twilight Zone. Poor dear. My young daughter would sing with the machines we have had and she told me it sounds like this or that and if you listen with an open heart and relax you can make up these sounds to sound like what you want. Lots of fun back then. This lady in question needs help from a friendly retirement home to talk to people, not washing machines.
#68
A woman in my town once called 911 because her washing machine was making strange noises and she thought it was possessed by the devil.
Mirriam 8 years ago
Why call 911? What are they gonna do? Everybody knows you call the exorcist when your washing machine gets possessed by the devil.
Weeping Willowz (WeepingWillowz) 8 years ago
Why are the washing machines always the first to get possessed? Give microwaves the chance of demonic possession!
#69
My neighbour's sprinkler is on and it's getting MY lawn wet..... I wish I was kidding
logical fallacy 8 years ago
Depends on your garden actually. Some plants shouldn't be watered too often, and the other way round. Still, for the average lawn that shouldnt be a problem.
Load More Replies... Zenozenobee 8 years ago
O.K., that's probbly the worst one about stupid complain... get free sprinkle and be so upset about it that it become an emergency...
#70
"University 911, where's your emergency?" "**** Hall parking lot. My car's frozen over and I broke my scraper! Send Police to help!" "Sir, this is an emergency line. Are you hurt or in any danger?" "No, but if I don't get my car out, the store's going to run out of iPhones! I need to get into line now!"
Lazy Panda 8 years ago
Oh wow I commented the exact same thing as you and I didn't even see until I opened up more comments!
Load More Replies... #71
I had a man call and complain because his neighbor had a Mexican flag flying above the American flag in his yard. He wanted us to arrest him and take his flags down. I told him we wouldn't do that, and he asked to speak to the watch commander. He kept calling and reciting the flag code to me. He eventually wanted to complain to internal affairs. I never got the official complaint so I'm sure they didn't make him happy either.
Jamie Buckles 8 years ago
It is also illegal to spit on the sidewalk in Seattle or to collude with a foreign nation (US) during the elections.
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Lorelai Purvis 4 years ago
dude i dont understand... he's mexican-american... i have never been able to understand why some people are like this
Holly Hobby 8 years ago
Go to war with the flag on your arm and you might understand what patriotism actually is Justina.
Signe Manat Hansen 8 years ago
Really, you find that odd? You think that's a good use of 911?
Load More Replies... #72
The most favorite call I've ever had was this woman calling because the lady in front of her at the church's chicken drive thru was taking too long to place her order. She called 911. Her emergency was that she was trying to get chicken.
Marzo Florida 8 years ago
"Church's" is a restaurant. It has has awesome fried chicken and stuff, similar to Popeye's and KFC
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Marcus D. Potter 2 years ago
If I were the officer asked to respond, then I would've chickened out of that call! :D
#73
A couple weeks ago a woman called and said she put her daughter in a zero gravity machine to keep her safe and then accidentally shrunk her. She is now between the carpet and the carpet padding and you can see her moving around like a worm underground.
Zenozenobee 8 years ago
Either it's a joke, either someone need a shrink.....either I 'd like to know what she took, it seems pretty efficient
Maggie Grover Bacher 8 years ago
i hope someone was dispatched to check on any kids that may have actually been in the house and see if the woman was in need of medical help or was on a bad trip
AnnieLaurie Burke 8 years ago
Whaatever the condition of the mother, the kid needs to be taken somewhere safe.
#74
"911 what is your emergency?" "I have an intruder in my house." "Okay, what is your address?" "It's a bird."
#75
I've had someone call 911 because they were lonely. About 1,000 times.
Zenozenobee 8 years ago
The amount of people feeling alone enough to randomly call emergency services or customer services to simply have a talk is more important than you think. I used to work for a customer service for an energy compagny, that's crazy how many people call you on a 24 december or 31 december to help them understand their bill...
Anita Wolf 8 years ago
Isn't there a way for 911 to forward those calls to mental - support lines?
#76
Woman calling to complain that her McDonald's triple thick milkshake isn't thick.
Susann Campbell 8 years ago
I just took mine back and said to make another one that was thick. Sheese.
Erin Zelnio 8 years ago
I always wonder if these people really exist, because I've never met anyone this stupid/self-absorbed. Then I read the comments where people cite similar examples, and then I wonder if I just need to get out more and meet more people.
🌟Jim Phoenix🌟 8 years ago
If you have a problem, then complain to McDonalds, or add heavy cream into it. THERE.
#77
Had a woman call because her "baby" wasn't breathing, so we gave her instructions to do CPR. Medics got there and found her doing CPR on her dog.
Hans 8 years ago
Actually, it was very stupid of her not to be specific (for she could have received more detailed instructions), but the effort by itself is absolutely warranted!
Alia Gail 8 years ago
My grandmother called 911 that her dog wasn't breathing (she specified he was a dog) and they actualy drove over and helped <3
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M O'Connell 8 years ago
I can understand this. There is no especially easy to get in contact with an emergency veterinarian. The nearest emergency vet is a 50 minute drive from my home, and is an 11-digit phone number. She was in a panic.
Heart Maverick 8 years ago
Dogs and humans have different biology, so if they actually gave I structures for how to do car on a dog it may have been more effective, I mean one misstep and it could have done damage. Well I've been wanting to buy a wolf mix, so I think I'll look into how to do this.
Marcus D. Potter 3 years ago
No point calling for a veterinary emergency, that's what the vet or failing that the American version of the RSPCA is for. ;)
Susann Campbell 8 years ago
It was her baby and I hope the Medics helped her calm down and saved her dog.
#78
"The neighbor is giving my horse drugs." - 0500 or earlier, every. Single. Day. Usually followed up about an hour later by: "It's crack!"
logical fallacy 8 years ago
Comforting to know that the owner of that horse knows so much about horses.
Load More Replies... Lazy Panda 8 years ago
It was probably a sugar cube, but to be fair, those aren't exactly good for the horse either (correctly me if I'm wrong about that)
M O'Connell 8 years ago
If it's every day, why doesn't that guy just tell his neighbor to stop? That other guy would be me, btw. I would love if my neighbor had horses instead of children...
#79
Female caller asking on 911 where she could find crack in her neighborhood. According to her there was a crack shortage in town and she was coming up empty everywhere. Calltaker asked for her location, she gave it with no hesitation (she was standing about a block away from our dispatch center) and PD promptly picked her up for public intox.
#80
Me: 911 What's your emergency Him: "My Grandma's really starting to piss me off"
#81
Callers who missed their alarm and were going to be late for a flight wanted officers to take them to the airport.
#82
Someone called because the sand at the volleyball court was too hot. It was 80 degrees out. I never really did figure out what exactly they wanted me to do about it.
#83
Suspicious Hispanic males in the alley. Complainant (person calling 911) is very nervous and upset, thinks they're casing the neighborhood to burglarize houses because it's a nice area. I get there. It's a bucket truck. From the power company. Replacing a transformer. Employees were all uniformed. They were Mexican, though, she was right about that. I asked them if someone had been watching them through the blinds (she was), told them why I was there, we all laughed and I went back to work.
AnnieLaurie Burke 8 years ago
Sad there are so many ignorant bigots around. Maybe we could get that homicidal cat to take them out.
Elizabeth Molloy 8 years ago
How much of that c**p do you think those guys have to put up with?
#84
One was the pregnant lady who INSISTED I wake up the on-call (chief of OB/GYN at the hospital was on call that night) because she had itchy nipples. Itchy f*cking nipples. But because I'm not medically trained, if the patient says it is an emergency, I have to page it. He was NOT happy with me.
Hamlets twin 8 years ago
I feel like a 7 year old... "itchy-nipples" has me laughing way too hard!
Judy Semmens 8 years ago
I recently read an article about breast cancer which gave a list of possible signs. Itchiness was one of them. No, it wasn't me - I'm just saying there might have been a bit more to this than the story we've been given.
#85
I had a caller who said she witnessed a car accident. I took all the information (location, vehicles involved, etc). Just before I dispatch PD she tells me that she saw it in her dream the night before. She took a trip to the psych ward of the hospital.
Melody Reid 8 years ago
I had a dream of a car accident for my sister, 15 years before the potential event. I saw my sister as an older person with two children, the details of the car, her brakes failing on a windy road, her car flying off the road and crashing, her dying, and her Kids found in the wreckage. I had the intense dream for three nights in a row. I was 15 when I had the dream. My sister was 9 then. In 15 years my sister bought the car I saw in the dream. As soon as I saw it I started to become very ill. I had my husband check the brake lines for this car. He touched them and they crumbled in his hands with brake fluid spilling on the ground. My sister was going to drive the next day on the road I saw in the dream. If she would have driven on that super windy road her brakes would have failed and she most likely would have careened off the cliff with her two children. She didn't take the road since her brakes on the car were bad. Sometimes dreams are meant as a warning.
Collin Ramsey 6 years ago
That is one serious case of Final Destination, minus the death part.
Load More Replies... Maggie Grover Bacher 8 years ago
that is one intense dream and some serious dream recollection
Sherry Paschal 8 years ago
I was stationed overseas when I dreamt of the murder of a girl I went church with when I was in high school. I saw where her car was and everything. I called home to find out about this. It turned out the girl was missing. Months later her car was found, and her body, just like in my dream. I hadn't seen the girl since around graduation time. We didn't go to the same school. That was about 8 years prior to her murder. I was in Japan and this happened in SC. I also dreamt about the towers falling on 9/11 two days prior, I just didn't realize what my dream was about until a day after it happened. Not all dreams are hokey. I've had others. One saved my daughter's life in preparing for the birth of my grandson. I had the privilege of delivering him because of that.
Collin Ramsey 6 years ago
Sherry, have you ever heard of Final Destination? Because those dreams are exactly like the premonitions in those movies.
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#86
Had a woman call 911 because she saw someone driving down the road with his foot out the window. She was following him the whole time, and admitted he had his seatbelt on, wasn't texting or speeding, he just had his foot out the window. She wanted the police to pull him over, to which I had to explain he wasn't breaking any laws. She couldn't comprehend that driving with your foot out the window is not illegal, and proceeded to hang up on me, then call 911 again because apparently I didn't know the law and she NEEDED someone to stop this man. We connected her to a deputy who told her if she didn't stop calling 911 for stupid reasons he was going to ticket her for abuse of emergency communications.
TC 8 years ago
Was it a passenger or the actual driver ? To be honest I don't think it's safe to drive a car with a foot sticking out of the window...
Jörg Zingler 8 years ago
I Germany you will get a penalty if you drive with bare feet, both on the pedals.
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#87
A woman reported "either a fox or a werewolf" standing on a street corner.
#88
One woman called sobbing because the snow plow filled in the end of her driveway that she just shoveled.
Karen Drucks 8 years ago
Man, that I can sympathize....lived in Tahoe and they filled my driveway every morning, after I had shoveled it out at 3 AM coming home from work....
Mary Kavanagh 8 years ago
The moral of that story is, wait till the snow plough is gone before clearing your drive!
Grace Smith 8 years ago
Nawwwww poor lady. She’s probably had a stressful day. She’s probably tired. And she just work hard at shoveling her driveway. And the snow plough goes and shoves it all on her driveway. That a pretty s****y thing to do. I was to hug her
Patricia Perrings 8 years ago
She has my sympathy, as I have had the plow, plow the snow / ice off the street onto the end of my driveway too. The blocks of ice that form from being packed by the plow are hard and heavy to move. My heart goes out to her.
#89
"I was watching porn, and a window popped up telling me the FBI locked my computer for viewing child porn."
Zenozenobee 8 years ago
There are really strange people on Earth... how many of those post concern idiotic people calling 911 to complain about the illegal stuff their doing?
Jörg Zingler 8 years ago
Thats a common virus strg +alt + delete, task manager, close browser will help. It comes also on non pornographic sites.
Load More Replies... Kay Pahlad 7 years ago
Makes me wanna type in child porn and see who turns up on my doorstep 😂
#90
"There are some kids hanging around on the street!" "What are they doing?" "They're just stood around talking!" "... ... ..." "Well, what are you going to do about it?"
Zenozenobee 8 years ago
"Yaeh right! what are you doing about people having a (social) life/fun when I have none!"
MIRANDA FERNANDES 6 years ago
I was playing Pokémon Go once and there was a big group of us at a park for a Tyranitar raid and somebody called the police on us. Not because we were suspicious or anything but because she was sure we were having sex in public. Fifteen people (a mic of adults, teens and kids) furiously tapping their phones were having sex...
Elizabeth Molloy 8 years ago
Grrrr! I hate people who mistrust kids just cos they're kids. What did *they* get up to which makes them suspicious? Kids have got to go SOMEWHERE.
Daniel Losinger 8 years ago
If they were having a conversation, then that is not loitering. By legal definition, loitering is staying in one place with no purpose for being there.
Load More Replies... #91
One woman called 911 saying all of her smoke alarms were going off and her garage smelled funny. Okay get everyone out of the house. Do you know why your garage smells funny? No but I started my car and left all the doors shut.
#92
Elderly lady calls 911, she asks what happened, why was it dark, where was the sun. You could hear the anxiety and concern in her voice. It was like 3am. It took some back and forth before he finally explains it's the middle of the night. She actually realizes what's up and apologizes for calling.
M O'Connell 8 years ago
My grandmother made a number of calls to 911 before she went into an assisted-care facility, luckily it was a small town, the police would stop at my uncle's house, pick him up and take him over there to calm her down.
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Addison Martin 8 years ago
My friends roomate who is studying to be a pediatric nurse was so hopped up on energy drinks she lost track of time. Poor thing thought it was 2:30pm when it was actually 2:30am. Called 911 and had a mental breakdown while on the phone.
Hamlets twin 8 years ago
in Alaska its light for 3 months straight and dark for 3 months. Sleep deprivation can do some weird things to your brain...
Kay Pahlad 7 years ago
Maybe someone stoled the sun, did they investigate? Guru has been trying for years.
#93
I had a lady call 911 because she saw whales in the ocean and thought they were in distress.
#94
Called to investigate 'puppies whining inside a Chinese food restaurant'...There were no puppies.
Maggie Grover Bacher 8 years ago
you are going straight to hades . . . . i'll see you there cuz i laughed
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#95
I've had someone call 911 in a rural community because a black dude was walking down the street and "we don't get their kind here".
AnnieLaurie Burke 8 years ago
Where is that homicidal cat when you need him to knock off the lunatic bigots???
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Della VanNeste 7 years ago
And yet people still say we don’t need movements like black lives matter
#96
"How far down is it snowing?" All the way to the ground, now get the f*ck off my emergency line!
#97
A man called to say his house was infested with hundreds of ant size dogs.
Vlad Horobet 8 years ago
What's worse, to be infested of 100 ant sized dogs or 1 dog sized ant?
Kirstin TransGirl 3 years ago
Dog sized ant means its an ant as big as a dog
Load More Replies... Maggie Grover Bacher 8 years ago
and did someone go to see if his chemical imbalance was natural or induced?
#98
One that happens more than you would think is parents calling asking help from the police to help parent their child. "I need someone here to tell my son/daughter to do their homework/take a bath/wake them up/make them go to school."
Jörg Zingler 8 years ago
Happened in Germany quite often recently. Even the other way round pupils called the police because they weren't allowed to go home early. They claimed they were held hostage....
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beebo is my child 8 years ago
My mom used to drive me to the police station because I wouldn't stay in the corner when I got punished
Marie-Louise Chenois 8 years ago
Consequence of parents telling theyr child "if you do not behave good, the police will come and catch ya", so when they realize they still have no authority, they try to rly make the police come, hoping it will improve stuff a bit
Arabella ✞ 8 years ago
My sister got caught forging my dad's signature. She was anywhere from 11-13 and didn't know it was wrong, which is odd because I am 2 years younger and knew. (I am the smart one.) Anyway, as a punishment, 2 officers were called by my late stepmom to the house to talk to her about it. Lo and behold, they were her D.A.R.E. officers from school, well, one of them was. XD
#99
Guy who went with two girls to a hotel room for sexy times called to complain they stole $50 and kicked him out of the room, my senior dispatcher told him it wasn't theft, it was payment for services rendered, but he'd be happy to send an officer to arrest him as well.
Marie-Louise Chenois 8 years ago
"but they kept saying i was so hot, they've been letting me do all i wanted for exactly half an hour!!!"
Load More Replies... #100
I had a woman calling hysterical, sounded really serious. I finally get her calmed down enough to tell me what's going on... she was scared of a pigeon that wouldn't fly away. She was safe in her car with 2 young kids. I was berated at and called useless because I wouldn't send an officer to shoo it away for her.
DingyAntelope58 Niamh lane 6 years ago
Oh my God mum, it's a f**king pigeon. I swear to God, I will drive over it if you don't get real.
Load More Replies... Anita Wolf 8 years ago
Panic attacks can get quite serious. Somebody freaking out about something that usual, being responsible for two children that small, should be an emergency of some kind.
Emily Fravel 7 years ago
No. I’m terrified of birds. I’m not f*****g calling 911 and then berating them when they won’t send an officer. If her fear is that strong, she needs help, but not from an officer.
Load More Replies... #101
She called 911 because she lost her phone... in her house... and wanted me to call it so she could find it. Apparently she was borrowing a friend's phone that could only make emergency calls.
Þórlaug Ágústsdóttir 8 years ago
I mean, if you can only call one place that place is supposed to solve EVERYTHING
TC 8 years ago
Well, it's not an emergency, true. But it's no money cost and it would help the woman out.
CelSlade 8 years ago
In the meantime someone in desperate need of medical help cannot get through to 911 because some idiot brat thought her phone was more important than someone's life.
Load More Replies... #102
Paramedic here. We responded to a call for a woman that ate a jalapeno and her mouth hurt. Upon arriving at the scene, we got cancelled because she ate some bread and drank milk.
#103
"911 what is the location of your emergency?" "Oh, this isn't an emergency."
jesstastic 6 years ago
We don't have a non-emergency number in my town if we need to report something we have to call 911.
Susan McNeely 8 years ago
Not a 911 worker just a mom, my 12 year old son called 911 because he caught his thumb in the window when he opened it and it really hurt and bruised his thumb, I come home and find an ambulance, fire truck and two cop cars there for this emergency! Explained to my son 911 is only called if you stop breathing, your heart stops, you are missing a body part or there is more blood on the floor than what will fit in a 16 ounce glass!
Nikki Angulo 8 years ago
I worked at a call out centre, you had to dial 9 to get a line out and then a 1 before the area code, one time I dialled 9 then 1 then was checking what the rest of the number was, and it connected me to 911, (maybe I double tapped the 1, but I don't think so) apparently that happened a lot because we were told about it in training, and if it happened we just had to tell them that it was an accident.
Hamlets twin 8 years ago
not everyone knows how to find the non-emergency line. just redirect them, don't be a jackass
Emily Fravel 7 years ago
Not every area even has a non-emergency line anymore.
Load More Replies... #104
People call several times a day about squirrels in their yard. Not even squirrels that are acting weird, just squirrels.
Tim Holyoake 7 years ago
NEVER trust squirrels, they are in league with field mice. And they are from the alien space federation. So I think that it’s about time you folks started doing your jobs properly 🤪
Lazy Panda 8 years ago
In my grandparents old house there was an orange squirrel that everyone hated, he would steal the bird seed but then he actually got aggressive towards people, once I was looking at him through a window and he bared his teeth and started clawing at the window. Once it jumped on my grandfather and wouldn't get off, they almost called animal control but not the police! If you have a problem, call animal control first, people!
#105
911 responder (paramedic) here. 3am 911 call for unknown medical aid, lights and sirens. Upon arrival, what's wrong sir? "I can't sleep!" So you want to go to the hospital? "No, can you give me something to sleep? I just started a new sleeping pill tonight and it's not working." No sir, we can only take you to the hospital. We're not a mobile pharmacy. "Oh, then never mind, you can leave. I'll just call my doctor in the morning."
#106
A guy called hoping we could go in and recover his bondage equipment from a friend's house after that friend died.
M O'Connell 8 years ago
I suppose this might be a legit request. Would you want to clean out your mother's house after she passed and find out she was into bondage? Probably not, the guy was trying to save his friend's family (and himself) from embarrassment.
#107
EMT here, I once responded to a man in his mid to late sixties lights and siren. On arrival instead of finding him experiencing abdominal pain like he told the dispatcher he simply had an itchy belly. I get that it itches and that sucks, But do you honestly think this is a good reason to occupy an emergency ambulance? Not only did he make us take him to the ER but asked why we weren't driving with the lights on. Good thing stupid isn't contagious.
Tanya Coco 8 years ago
Stupid is in fact contagious when it breeds. Unfortunately, that happens quite often.
PT 8 years ago
Time to remove the warning labels and let it sort itself out.
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JESSICA Girardo 8 years ago
In some cases this can in fact he emergent. Abdominal/ trunk itching that's constant and severe is a symptom of liver/hepatic failure. It's caused by bile crystals on your skin.
#108
Just got off work and the last call of the night was a group of college girls running back and forth around their apartment from a possum, squealing (the girls, not the possum). I've heard people get stabbed to death and make less of a fuss.
#109
We had a call for a guy with a toothache. At 3AM. On a Saturday. The guy stated that he'd been hurting for about three weeks, and no it wasn't getting any worse. He was insisting on going to the hospital no matter how much we discouraged him. Then he keeled over and went into cardiac arrest. Not so stupid anymore.
Gary Scott 8 years ago
Toothache, or aching in the jaw, is a potential symptom of a heart attack.
Roxy Eastland 8 years ago
Heart attacks can also be accompanied by a feeling of doom. Sounds like he knew something was really wrong but couldn't work out what.
Load More Replies... #110
"There's a sophomore here, and I think he's too drunk." "Do you think he has alcohol poisoning? Is he conscious and alert, breathing?" "Umm....he's breathing and stuff, he just, he --- can't get on the toilet." "Excuse me?" "I've been watching him for the last 30 minutes. He keeps trying to get on the toilet, and....failing." "Okay then, I'll send you an ambulance." "It's kind of entrancing. He's trying SO HARD and he just can't get on top of it."
Lacy Tinsley 8 years ago
there is a time and place for everything, so they say, and thats college
Load More Replies... Nickie LaRue 8 years ago
Yeah, the caller was high AF. I'm amazed he was able to make the call...
Maggie Grover Bacher 8 years ago
been watching him for 30 minutes. . . . it's kind of entrancing. (why did you call the police exactly)
#111
"There's a bicycle parked up next to the bus stop near my house, reporting it as suspicious because I've never seen it there before."
Kay Pahlad 7 years ago
Good thing they watching that suspicious bicycle, it might suddenly become a tricycle. Best report it.👍
#112
"80 y/o male, took an ambien and feels drowsy" at around 2 am. We came, tucked him in, went home.
#113
A man called to say his 50p coin was stuck in a washing machine at his local launderette and wanted police to retrieve it
Marie-Louise Chenois 8 years ago
I Wonder if these kinds of call would still happen if he had to pay for the call...
#114
"My neighbor is watering her lawn, and it's not her day to water the lawn."
Shari H 8 years ago
Not 911 worthy, but that is a problem in drought susceptible areas. When I lived in Florida they could charge a $100 fine for watering or washing your car on off days.
M O'Connell 8 years ago
You obviously don't live somewhere with a water shortage. The odd side of the street gets odd-days, the even side of the street gets even days. it may only be an ordinance violation, but when your tap is dry, think about it...
Load More Replies... #115
"911, what's your emergency?" "Yeah, I ordered chicken wings for delivery like an hour ago. Now the pizza place is closed and they won't answer the phone. They stole my money!" "Sir, did you call 911 because of missing chicken wings?" "Uh..." click
Marcus D. Potter 3 years ago
What a moron. He should've just explained to the Dispatcher that he did call 911 because of missing chicken wings and that he no longer requires assistance from the emergency services. Problem solved.
#116
"Was that an earthquake?" "Uh, yes." "Ok bye."
Marie-Louise Chenois 8 years ago
"Just to be sure it was not the earth center who had been turned into supreme destruction weapon against the moon"
Judy Semmens 8 years ago
At least they weren't demolishing Earth to make way for an intergalactic bypass.
Luna Kittenwarrior 8 years ago
Just to be sure that Earth wasn't at the club dancing with the Moon.
#117
A guy who tried to burn off haemorrhoids with dry ice.
Kori K. Warriner 8 years ago
Yes, but the dumbassery of the attempt is what makes it ridiculous.
Load More Replies... Hamlets twin 8 years ago
And yet he doesn't mention the burned fingers when trying to strategically position the dry ice
#118
15 year old girl said there was a 3 foot monster, we thought it was a rabid dog. Turns out it was a 2 inch spider...
Luna Kittenwarrior 8 years ago
Arachnophobics... when they're severe, they can do stupid things. No offense to arachnophobics, though.
Della VanNeste 7 years ago
None taken. We can get irrational. Phobias tend to do that to you
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Mary Moeller 3 years ago
unless its an actual 3 ft spider or 2 ft spider or 1 ft spider or 6 inch spider i won't call 911. i'll kill it and then have nightmares at which i wake up screaming and throwing things at a non existent spider thus waking up the entire neighborhood and having them call the cops... problem solved
#119
I've had someone call 911 to ask what the fines for parking tickets are.
#120
A man who did not have change for a parking machine claimed staff at a car park had kidnapped him because they were refusing to let him out for free
#121
A man called 999 as he was advised to call 111 but did not know the number
Lauren Towner 8 years ago
For those unaware, 111 is the non-emergency medical phone number here in the UK (NHS 111 service). Fun additional facts; 101 is the non-emergency police number :) and 112 works the same as the 999 emergency number :D
TC 8 years ago
I think it's 112 all around the European Union. Oh sorry... You're almost out ...
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Marcus D. Potter 3 years ago
Funnily enough a man called 999 as he was advised to call 101 (which is the UK's version of 311) but did not know the number. :D
Sue Hosking 7 years ago
112 is a universal number that will automatically forward you to the emergency number relevant to what every country you’re in. So if you’re in Australia it will forward you to 000 if you’re in the UK 999 US 911 and so on. It just makes international travel easier for people to only have to remember one number in and emergency regardless of where you are.
Kelly Dunigan 7 years ago
112 is the best number to call as the emergency service can triangulate your position to within 10m when a call is placed to that number unlike a 999 call
Kay Pahlad 7 years ago
In South Africa we have 10111 and 10177...Could we not afford triple digits?
Elizabeth Molloy 8 years ago
Ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss!
#122
Someone called 911 and spoke Cantonese only. Since we couldn't translate we took him to the closest hospital. Come to find out he needed a ride for his appointment, and we took him to the wrong hospital. Needless to say he was pissed. F*ck him, that's not what 911 is for.
Marcus D. Potter 3 years ago
It's unfortunate that the correct hospital got the brunt of the punishment, not the perpetrator. :(
#123
You took my husband to the hospital, but you left his dog here and now it has to pee. You need to come take it out. I can't walk outside.
#124
I was a 911 dispatcher in a small rural county for about 2 years. After some training I was finally taking calls and the very first 911 call that came in was from a middle-aged man who was driving with his elderly mother. He had stopped to get gas or something and accidentally locked his keys in the car, and his mother couldn't figure out how to get out of the locked car. I'm all "Ok sir, can you ask her to open the door?", he's all "I'm trying to get her to unlock the door but I don't think she understands what I'm saying." I'm at a loss for words as this wasn't the emergency I was expecting, meanwhile I'm looking to my supervisor for some assistance and she is laughing so hard she can't help. They eventually figured it out between themselves, but it seemed pretty stupid at the time.
Shari H 8 years ago
Until you've dealt with an elderly person with dementia. This call was no more stupid than if a toddler were locked in the car.
Marcus D. Potter 3 years ago
Seems like a reasonable call. There could've been a concern for safety, especially in hot weather.
#125
Had a woman call because she was afraid her boyfriend would beat her. for being pregnant. with the alien's baby. mind you, he spends most of his time IN the tv on guiding light... so she's only worried about at night when he's not in the tv.
Maggie Grover Bacher 8 years ago
and we sent someone to help her find a nice safe hospital room, right?
#126
Once a man called wanting us to come out and remove the squirrels from his neighbor's trees because they were occasionally dropping nuts in his yard and he was tired of cleaning them up. I told him no one would remove squirrels so he asked that someone remove the trees from his neighbor's yard.
#127
A few years ago, over the course of a week a man called about 10 times to tell us he got his head stuck in a fish bowl and swallowed a fish. He refused to tell us where he was.
#128
Caller: Hi! I'd like to report a roberry. I was just over at the Wendy's drive-through where I ordered a double. Well, I just got home and found out they gave me a single. I want you to send the Police out to arrest them for theft of a hamburger patty.
Heather Talma 3 years ago
I took a couple seconds trying to figure out what kind of berry a "roberry" is and why you would be reporting it.
#129
Guy pulled up in a car and asked another guy for money. So guy have him $40. Guy then drove away with the money. Guy called saying he'd been robbed, because he expected the guy to give the money back...
💖 Stacy Rae 💖 8 years ago
I'm imagining someone trying to rob somebody with gum now. "Give me the money, I've got juicy fruit and I'm not afraid to use it."
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Lilly griffith 8 years ago
Why would someone give the money back? Did you assume they wanted to just hold it or something?
#130
My mom works as a 911 operator. She got a call one time from a girl in gym class at the local high school. She was in a panic and completely serious saying there was a squirrel on top of a telephone pole at the school and it wasn't coming down.
Master Markus 8 years ago
Maybe for PETA, but not for any place where you actually need to know about how animals work.
Load More Replies... #131
Someone called because they were "charged" by a baby squirrel. I LOLed when I got dispatched to that one.
Robert Bailey 8 years ago
that's the most foul, cruel and bad tempered rodent you ever set eyes on.
Maggie Grover Bacher 8 years ago
if they think you have nuts, *stop snickering you know what i mean* they will do a thorough search to find them
Judy Semmens 8 years ago
Squirrels may bite you if they think you should be feeding them and you don't. It's happened to people I knew, in a park where squirrels learned to *expect* food from humans. They look cute, but their bite can still be nasty.
#132
I had someone call to see if the fire department could try a kite out of a tree. She was persistent because the kite cost $200.
Zenozenobee 8 years ago
She must climb to the tree, only then, she call 911 because she is stuck in the tree with her 200$ kite ;p
#133
A grown man called at 2am once to report that he saw a cat running around outside and he thought it was a little too cold out and instead of stopping to try and get the cat himself, he wanted first responders to send out a search party.
Patrick Bateman 8 years ago
Meanwhile two murders, a fatal fire, and a domestic abuse incident occurred and couldn't be reported because idiots tie up the lines for things like this.
Juliana Souza 8 years ago
This is why misuse of emergency services is punishable
Load More Replies... Quan Ly 8 years ago
Still bad that he called 911 about it instead of taking it in himself or taking it to a shelter.
Load More Replies... #134
Just today a lady could not get off of her toilet. I had to put in a call for paramedics because she said she was stuck to the thing. And a call for the police department because her door was locked and we needed forced entry.
Elizabeth Molloy 8 years ago
How is this funny/ridiculous? People *have* been stuck like this.
Mary Moeller 3 years ago
this reminds me of a news report i read where the guy who finally called the cops said his gf was stuck to the toilet and had been for 5 years and according to the report she actually was. the report was really bizarre and the guy i think was in trouble because well she had kids and all of it was really bizarre
Marcus D. Potter 3 years ago
Why the Police? Surely the Fire Department would've been more suitable for dealing with a trapped person, and they could also force entry?
Melanie Linehan 8 years ago
I think it doesn't have more votes, because that could be a real emergency.
Load More Replies... #135
A grown man calling because he found a turtle.
#136
Caller: My phone is locked and I can only make emergency calls. Operator: Is this an emergency?
Debbie Victoria 8 years ago
this happened to my late mother a couple time..... she would get absolutely irate. It finally occurred to her to drive to the nearby fire station, and one of the nice firefighters would fix it for her!!! (apparently reading the instructions on the screen and following them were beyond her)
#137
Guy got stuck head first in a kids slide with his arms stuck at his sides. Had to be extracted by the fire department.
Thomas JohnstonJr 7 years ago
We are dumb as s**t and trying to recapture our youth when we were cool.
Load More Replies... #138
Another woman calling, terrified, whispering into the phone. Says she's locked in a closet with her kids. I'm thinking a home invasion robbery, and as soon as I get her address, I slam the call in and get ready to start updating quickly. "Why was she huddled in her closet, terrified and on the verge of tears, milkcustard?" Glad you asked. This woman saw a mouse in her house and was terrified and didn't know what to do because her husband was deployed, so she wanted an officer to come out and tak
Cassie 8 years ago
Once had a mouse run through our living room. My husband and son leapt to the back of the couch. I grabbed a pair of leather work gloves, caught it, and let it go outside where one of my hens snatched it up and swallowed it whole. I do freak about spiders and wasps, though (but not enough to call 911!).
Michelle The Zombey 6 years ago
My mothers (indoor!) cat once catched a mouse, was horrified and threw it across the room into my mothers face who nearly passed out xD
#139
"911, what is your emergency?" "Yeah, uhh, I'm at and I'm in a wheelchair. I can't find any bathrooms big enough for a wheelchair." "Ok, I haven't been to the fair yet, so I'm not sure where it is, but I am guessing they have one. Have you tried going to the entrance and asking them?" "No! So what am I supposed to do? Just piss in my chair?" Then he hung up. I'm not sure of the outcome.
#140
Three o'clock in the morning, thanksgiving day morning, I had a guy call who said his throat was dry... No joke. I asked if he had a cup of water or anything, he (of course) said no. So I asked him what he wanted to do, and he said he wanted to go to the hospital.
#141
Lady called 911 because someone called her a whore. Her words (*translated): "I'm calling 'cuz they're calling me a whore and no man has ever f*cked me!" Dispatcher: "Ma'm... Do you have an emergency?" Lady: "They're calling me a whore and calling me things!" Dispatcher: "..." Lady: "And they're being mean! I need someone to come!" Dispatcher: "...Okay, we'll... sigh We'll send an officer..." Lady: "Uh-huh! hangs up"
Hans 8 years ago
Serious insults sound like a valid reason to call for cops...particually if they have a threatening tone...
EM 6 years ago
Unless it was a threat, an insult shouldn't be a reason to call the cops.
Load More Replies... Maggie Grover Bacher 8 years ago
if she is translating, i am wondering from what language. depending on the culture, there could have been a real threat.
#142
One was a very drunken college girl who was sobbing because she was so drunk and so cold that she was shivering and she couldn't get her house key into her door.
Daniel Losinger 8 years ago
That was an actual emergency. She could have died from hypothermia.
KrisF 8 years ago
That actually happened to a girl I grew up with. She died a few years ago in front of her apartment building because she was drunk and it was icy and she couldn't get inside.
Load More Replies... M O'Connell 8 years ago
It's awfully hard to respect anyone like this, but I do hope she got inside safely.
Diana Lucas 8 years ago
It was good she called. There was a story of a drunk girl who was just left on her front lawn passed out after being dropped off at from a party. She died of exposure.
#143
Guy swallowed a light bulb and a battery hoping to get a script for narcotics.
Chris Lopo 8 years ago
Well if the battery touches the light bulb just right he just might get an enlightening experience.
Load More Replies... Maggie Grover Bacher 8 years ago
yeah, i'm wondering what the thought trail was for that combo as well
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#144
I've had someone call 911 to know how long to smoke a brisket.
Ben Naylor 8 years ago
Way more info to be shared than this, but, roughly an hour per pound/500 g
#145
Once got 911 a call asking if our refrigerator was running.. Indeed it was.
Jamie Buckles 8 years ago
The joke is: "Is your refrigerator running? Answer: Yes. Punchline: Then, you better go catch it!!
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Lilly griffith 8 years ago
I want to sit this caller down and explain how to make an original prank call
Susie Saint Charles 8 years ago
Did they not do the punchline*? *"Then you better go catch it!"
#146
I had a lady call 911 because she put her credit card the wrong way in a parking meter and the lettering of her name had gotten the card stuck in the card reader. She wasn't too please when I advised her it wasn't an emergency and she needed to call the service number on the parking meter.
#147
I got a call once from a lady asking for a ride from the grocery store. She wasn't In danger or stranded.
Lily McCarthy 3 years ago
She could have called a relative or friend??? If she couldn't have contacted one at that time and it was cold enough that could be an emergency right????
#148
Got a call once of an empty wheelchair by a business. No one was around the wheelchair or calling for help, it was just sitting by a business so the caller wanted an officer to check it out.
Lacy Tinsley 8 years ago
ok that could be potentially be an emergency.. so many bad things could have happened to its owner.
Lily McCarthy 3 years ago
Robbed, mugged,kidnapped and murdered to name a few things that could have happened
Grace Smith 8 years ago
Ok that not too bad he’s probably just worried someone has lost it and needs help
#149
Paramedic here. Got the call for difficulty breathing. That's obviously a big deal, so we book it over there with the ambulance and fire engine as an all-hands on deck deal in case this goes south. Arrived to find an approximately 54 year old female patient absolutely SURROUNDED by cigarette butts, ash, and empty packs. When asked if she felt the difficulty breathing may have been from her recent and obvious chain smoking, she said no. She ended up feeling better and didn't want to go. What a surprise.
#150
Not a 911 operator but a friend is. A guy called in asking when someone was going to come pick up a bucket of possums. He had a bucket of baby possums and wanted someone from the sheriffs office to come get it. And yes, it was Florida.
Maggie Grover Bacher 8 years ago
animal control has their own number, people. if you can't google, can you use a telephone book?
Kerri Nyman 8 years ago
In our area, animal control is contacted by calling 911. You just let them know it's not an emergency, it's for animal control, and they transfer your call.
Load More Replies... #151
I've had someone call 911 report that their trunk wasn't opening and they wanted to know what to do about it.
#152
Toe pain at 3am on a Saturday night.
Stacey Sharpe 7 years ago
If you are diabetic, this could be a real medical issue, though not necessarily an emergency.
#153
Apparently there's this wild turkey near one of the backroads near the interstate for the past few weeks. We get about 3-4 calls a day about it.
Maggie Grover Bacher 8 years ago
we (school bus drivers) had some wild turkeys that would cross back and forth between two pig farms. every stinkin' day the things would wait for us and then cross in front of us. they crossed at a stop sign so we just watched their cocky little parade every day.
Kay Pahlad 7 years ago
While you waiting for them to cross, think of Thanksgiving..
Load More Replies... #154
Someone had a bug crawl into their ear while he was sleeping.
#155
I once had a 999 call from a guy working at a station, reporting a woman who was standing on a train platform and peeing onto the track.
Chris J. Ford 8 years ago
Sadly, that actually doesn't work. The per is in droplets by the time it hits the track, and can't conduct electricity back to the idiot doing the peeing.
Load More Replies... Marcus D. Potter 3 years ago (edited)
I've peed on train tracks before. This is an emergency though, she might hit the third rail or be standing dangerously close to the edge whilst a train runs past. ;)
#156
I can tell you the dumbest call I've ever been dispatched to, it was for a women who had had a splinter in her finger for three days. It was 10:30 at night and we got held over from our shift because of this call. We took her to the hospital and she asked us to drop her in the waiting room. I wanted to scream.
Linda Gulley 8 years ago
One woman or many women? You wrote a (single) women (plural.) Which is it?
#157
To ask if they can legally own a monkey.
Hamlets twin 8 years ago
Bing? Isn't that that page you go to after buying a computer so you can get to google?
Load More Replies... #158
A fire captain's (from a different city) son stubbed his toe on a cement bench and had us call him an ambulance so we could take him to the hospital.
#159
A woman has been calling for years to complain about white boxes in her yard that emit radio waves. At night, someone comes and moves them around in her yard.
Maggie Grover Bacher 8 years ago
and? what's the story? if it's been happening for years someone has been there at least once. she hasn't been deemed insane enough to warrant a care facility. what's the rest of the story?
M O'Connell 8 years ago
Civil commitment (where an individual is committed to a facility) is extremely difficult to arrange without the help of relatives. You can't simply lock people up because you think they're crazy.
Load More Replies... #160
Dispatcher ####, do you have an emergency? Yes, is ther a 24hr supermarket in the area?
Maggie Grover Bacher 8 years ago
is there a phone book in your area? have you heard of a thing called google?
#161
Another medical emergency, woman had taken 3 ibuprofen and wasn't sure what would happen.
DingyAntelope58 Niamh lane 6 years ago
Woman: What will happen to me?! Angry Responder: *pinching bridge of nose* Your intelligence will ascend to a new plane of existence. You will be a god. Woman: Really?! Yaaaaay!!! Angry Responder: *pulls headset off and screams at ceiling*
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Amy Pattie 8 years ago
I accidentally overdosed on ibuprofen several times... nothing happens. Doesn't even make the ache go away faster.
#162
Had a run where an elderly gentleman's glucose was 85 and he just knew he was dying (normal is 80-120 mg/dl).
Jeanne Crosby 8 years ago
If he is diabetic and his sugar is still not controlled,, i.e. New patient. 85 could be dangerously low. If your sugar has been running around 500. You can lose consciousness at 120. It happened to me.
Stacey Sharpe 7 years ago
When I got diagnosed, mine was 92 and I outright panicked. It's scary at first.
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Kennetta Bartels 4 years ago
85 can be a problem for diabetics that usually run higher. When I hit 80 I can start to feel the effects.
Melanie Linehan 8 years ago
They should of asked more questions. My son has a metabolic illness, that warrents treatment if his blood sugar falls below 100.
#163
One of my first calls. I dispatch for a variety of agencies including fish and wildlife. Get a call from a guy and the 911 map shows he is in the woods. He calls and says he was hiking and he wanted an escort out of the woods, where he chose to hike among nature, because he saw a bear. He was reminded that bears live in the woods and he was in their territory. Also the bear continued on the path and didn't even approach the caller.
Marie-Louise Chenois 8 years ago
I can understand that the guy was anxious if there was a bear around....Even if it's a bear forrest. I enjoy having beers around more.
#164
Had a woman get so angry about kids playing outside on their ATVs and bikes, on their family's property, in the middle of the day in the summer, that she had a stroke. She's ranting and raving and then all of a sudden, she's speaking slowly and her words are slurred and she's groaning... It was a weird thing to happen but she didn't need to be so damn angry over something like that. Sheesh.
Melanie Linehan 8 years ago
Maybe it was emotional incontinence, if she's had a previous stroke. Anger and uncontrolled outburst can happen after a stroke.
Emily Fravel 7 years ago
I’d say that the irrational emotional response was the indicator that a stroke was imminent.
#165
Lady calls about an injured animal off to the side of the road in a neighborhood with some of the highest crime in the area. Cops are busy with people getting shot and stuff. She is yelling at me that I'm cold-hearted because I haven't dispatched police, lights and sirens, and that this creature is suffering, and I'm responsible for it, etc. I ask what type of animal it is. "I don't believe any animal species is more important than any other." "Ma'm, What. Is. It." "It's a possum."
#166
Some dude was getting chased by a bobcat in Victoria.
AnnieLaurie Burke 8 years ago
Bobcats don't have much endurance for a long chase, being stealth predators, so just run for a quarter mile or so and he will get winded.
DingyAntelope58 Niamh lane 6 years ago
Which Victoria? Because if he's Australian, bobcats aren't in Australia.
Ryebread the White 8 years ago
HahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahshahahahGahahhahshshhsjudhwhrudhxsjueurhdhh
#167
A paramedic was mowing his lawn, for reasons still unexplained stuck his hand under the mower, sliced off half a finger, called 911 and requested an airlift to the trauma center.
Lilly griffith 8 years ago
It is but why did he put his hand under the mower in the first place
Load More Replies... Marie-Louise Chenois 8 years ago
Since he sliced off half a finger i find it quite normal that he asks for help (tough i agree that a random ambulance would be enough and not an airlift...Except if he lives in a place where ambulances can't go...
David Marzar 5 years ago
um why would you do that and you act like it would not happen its stupid then call 911
Marcus D. Potter 2 years ago
Idiot. Still, that was a valid reason to call 911, but was an airlift really necessary?
In various moments of confusion and misunderstanding, people might find themselves making bizarre calls to emergency services. Although it's unlikely to end in a cheeky revelation of adopting an animal, as seen in one entertaining prank, it's a reminder of the wide spectrum of odd behaviors people exhibit when under stress or misunderstanding situations.
For instance, you might want to look at how one woman humorously convinced a guy he'd adopted a chimp named Bubbles, bending reality for comedic effect.
What do you think ?
Kat Jones 8 years ago
I called the Police at 2am to report two men lurking in my driveway. Turned out they were the Police and were staking out the house across the road. :)
Sophie G 8 years ago
did you crawl out to bring 'em coffee and doughnuts??
Load More Replies... Marzo Florida 8 years ago
Some of these are kind of sweet or innocent like the guy helping the cat. This page reminds me of a little boy who called 911 to help him out with his math homework (in which the dispatcher walked him through it). His mom found out and apologized, but it was still really nice of her to end her time to him :p
Mark Love 8 years ago
I work for a dispatch centre in Sydney Australia. This is not funny but sure made a trainee learn how to answer a call. He answered the phone "Police Emergency Merry Christmas" the poor lady on the other end said "yeah Merry Christmas I have just found my son has hung himself overnight in his bedroom" It devistated the poor trainee that he burst into tears and was unconsoulable so management sent him home. After that he just answers the phone "Police Emergency". He is one of the best dispatchers in the place.
Glenn Herring 8 years ago
my oldest son called 911 because we were in the bedroom having sex telling them that we were doing inappropriate things...at the time he was about 9 or 10
Amy Harrison 8 years ago
I once called the police because I thought someone was shooting at my house. I was a single mother with 2 toddlers so I was rather freaked out. When the police came to my house they started looking for bullet holes at that very moment 3 acorns fell on my roof making the same noise that I had reported. I apologized and embarrassingly went back into my house.
Erynn Schwellinger 8 years ago
68 is sad. CPR is different with dogs, as is checking breathing. That's important to know to save a pet in an emergency.
Lukáš Himer 8 years ago
That's why you don't act like a f****n r****d and don't call your dog "baby".
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Michelle K Jewelry 8 years ago
#47... Maybe the lady was not as dumb as you supposed. It could have been a case where she placed a child for adoption and wanted to verify that it indeed was her child!
Kat Jones 8 years ago
I called the Police at 2am to report two men lurking in my driveway. Turned out they were the Police and were staking out the house across the road. :)
Sophie G 8 years ago
did you crawl out to bring 'em coffee and doughnuts??
Load More Replies... Marzo Florida 8 years ago
Some of these are kind of sweet or innocent like the guy helping the cat. This page reminds me of a little boy who called 911 to help him out with his math homework (in which the dispatcher walked him through it). His mom found out and apologized, but it was still really nice of her to end her time to him :p
Mark Love 8 years ago
I work for a dispatch centre in Sydney Australia. This is not funny but sure made a trainee learn how to answer a call. He answered the phone "Police Emergency Merry Christmas" the poor lady on the other end said "yeah Merry Christmas I have just found my son has hung himself overnight in his bedroom" It devistated the poor trainee that he burst into tears and was unconsoulable so management sent him home. After that he just answers the phone "Police Emergency". He is one of the best dispatchers in the place.
Glenn Herring 8 years ago
my oldest son called 911 because we were in the bedroom having sex telling them that we were doing inappropriate things...at the time he was about 9 or 10
Amy Harrison 8 years ago
I once called the police because I thought someone was shooting at my house. I was a single mother with 2 toddlers so I was rather freaked out. When the police came to my house they started looking for bullet holes at that very moment 3 acorns fell on my roof making the same noise that I had reported. I apologized and embarrassingly went back into my house.
Erynn Schwellinger 8 years ago
68 is sad. CPR is different with dogs, as is checking breathing. That's important to know to save a pet in an emergency.
Lukáš Himer 8 years ago
That's why you don't act like a f****n r****d and don't call your dog "baby".
Load More Replies... Michelle K Jewelry 8 years ago
#47... Maybe the lady was not as dumb as you supposed. It could have been a case where she placed a child for adoption and wanted to verify that it indeed was her child!
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