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“My Worst Nightmare”: Woman Realizes She Hates Having Children
Tired woman in pajamas looking distressed at her phone in kitchen, reflecting on challenges of motherhood and fears.

“My Worst Nightmare”: Woman Realizes She Hates Having Children

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Taking care of kids can sometimes feel like a full-time job with no breaks and little recognition. At times, the weight of it all can become overwhelming, leaving parents desperate to voice their struggles.

For example, one woman opened up about how incredibly difficult raising children has been for her. And though she deeply loves her kids, she admitted she’s unsure whether she was truly meant for parenthood. Keep reading to hear her raw and unfiltered experience of motherhood.

RELATED:

    Parenting can often feel exhausting and overwhelming

    Woman in pajamas looking stressed and tired at kitchen table, reflecting on fears about motherhood challenges.

    Image credits: volodymyr-t / freepik (not the actual photo)

    One woman shared that she regrets having children because it leaves her with no time for herself

    Alt text: Exhausted woman expressing fear and regret about motherhood, overwhelmed by constant demands and lack of personal time

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    Alt text: Woman fears she won’t survive motherhood, feeling overwhelmed by constant demands and regrets having kids.

    Toddler crying loudly in high chair, illustrating challenges and fears many women face in motherhood.

    Image credits: Helena Lopes / pexels (not the actual photo)

    Alt text: Woman fears she won’t survive motherhood, expressing regret and the challenges of raising children despite loving them.

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    Text expressing fear and regret about motherhood, feeling unprepared and worried about not surviving parenthood.

    Text explaining a woman’s struggles with motherhood, expressing fear and regret about the challenges of raising children.

    Man in dark shirt looking stressed and tired, sitting at desk with laptop at night, reflecting on motherhood fears and regrets.

    Image credits: Getty Images / Unsplash (not the actual photo)

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    Text discussing a woman fearing she won’t survive motherhood due to its struggles and regrets having children.

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    Excerpt from a woman fearing she won’t survive motherhood, struggling with childcare and household duties.

    Text image with a statement about struggling with motherhood saying kids are 18 months and 5, and it's hard right now.

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    Text about setting boundaries with kids, reflecting on challenges and regrets of motherhood, emphasizing love and respect.

    Text expressing gratitude from a woman fearing she won’t survive motherhood and regretting her decision to have kids.

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    Text explaining a woman’s fear of not surviving motherhood due to its difficulty and regret over having kids.

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    Text discussing a woman fearing she won’t survive motherhood and regretting her decision to have kids.

    Image credits: International-Echo99

    Being prepared for parenthood can make a huge difference in the journey

    There’s no denying that parenting can be a rewarding journey filled with love, laughter, and plenty of unforgettable moments. But hey, nobody said it was going to be easy. Don’t let those picture-perfect posts on social media fool you—the ones where kids are smiling in adorable outfits or parents are twinning in matching clothes. What you don’t see are the tantrums right before the photo or the sleepless nights behind those glowing smiles. Parenting is equal parts chaos and cuddles, and it’s important to remember that both sides are real.

    Behind all the excitement of baby names and nursery shopping, there’s a whole other side of parenting that doesn’t always get talked about. Being mentally prepared is just as important as stocking up on diapers and onesies. Parenthood is a huge shift in lifestyle and mindset, and it’s better to go into it with open eyes. 

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    Before diving headfirst into parenthood, one of the most crucial steps is talking openly with your partner. Make sure you’re both on the same page about expectations, responsibilities, and even the little details, like who’s on diaper duty at 3 a.m. These conversations might not sound romantic, but they’ll save you from bigger conflicts down the line. Parenthood is a team sport, and if one teammate is checked out, the whole game gets harder.

    It’s easy to focus so much on the baby that you forget about yourself, but your physical health plays a huge role in how smoothly the transition to parenthood goes. From pregnancy to sleepless nights with a newborn, your body will be working overtime. Staying healthy, eating well, and keeping active where possible can give you the stamina you’ll need. Remember, you can’t pour from an empty cup—taking care of yourself means you’ll be better equipped to care for your little one.

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    Another big decision many new parents face is whether or not to breastfeed. While some families swear by it, others find that formula works best for their situation. The important thing to remember is that there’s no “one size fits all” solution. What matters most is that your baby is fed, healthy, and growing, and that you feel supported in whatever choice you make. Don’t let outside pressure dictate what works best for you and your child.

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    Your career is another factor to think about before having kids. Will you be taking time off? Do you have flexibility at work? How will your long-term goals shift once a baby is in the picture? Balancing work and parenting can be tricky, but with some thoughtful planning, it’s possible to create a rhythm that works for your family. Whether it’s arranging flexible hours, working remotely, or taking a break, having a plan in place makes the transition smoother.

    It’s important to plan your finances carefully before pregnancy

    Let’s be honest, kids are wonderful, but they’re also expensive. From diapers to daycare, and doctor visits to school supplies, the costs add up quickly. That’s why discussing finances ahead of time is so important. Creating a realistic budget, setting aside savings, and talking through priorities can take a lot of stress off your plate. After all, the last thing you want is to be blindsided by expenses when you’re already running on little sleep.

    Another key part of preparation is figuring out childcare. Will you and your partner juggle shifts? Will family step in to help? Or will you need professional childcare options? Having these conversations early can save a lot of last-minute panic. It’s also worth considering how much support you’ll realistically have. Sometimes grandparents live far away, or family members can’t commit as much as you’d hoped. Knowing your options in advance is a game changer.

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    At the end of the day, being prepared—mentally, physically, financially, and emotionally—makes the parenting journey smoother. No one can predict every challenge, but thinking ahead gives you tools to navigate the tough days. Preparation won’t erase the hard parts, but it will give you the confidence to handle them when they come.

    In this case, the author admitted she was exhausted and struggling with motherhood despite loving her children deeply. What she needed most was help, support, and understanding. Her story is a reminder that while parenting is beautiful, it can also be brutally hard, and that asking for help is not a weakness but a vital part of the journey.

    Many people online expressed sympathy for her situation, while a few questioned her decision to have kids

    Text conversation about how exhausting motherhood can be, expressing fears about surviving motherhood and its difficulties.

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    Woman fears motherhood is overwhelming as toddler struggles cause exhaustion and emotional stress at home.

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    Alt text: Online comments discussing challenges of motherhood and a woman's fear she won’t survive as it’s so hard.

    Comment expressing empathy for a woman fearing she won’t survive motherhood due to its difficulty and regrets having kids.

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    Text post expressing fear and regret about becoming a parent, highlighting how hard motherhood and raising kids can be.

    Comment expressing a woman fears motherhood is hard and regrets decision to have kids, sharing temporary struggles with teens.

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    Screenshot of a comment expressing fear and regret about motherhood and the challenges of having kids.

    Text comment expressing sympathy about a woman fearing she won’t survive motherhood and regretting having kids.

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    Comment expressing fears about surviving motherhood and regret over the hard decision to have kids.

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    Text post showing advice about taking a break from house chores, reflecting fears of motherhood challenges.

    Comment discussing the difficulties of having kids, highlighting challenges of motherhood and partner support.

    Text excerpt discussing the hardships of motherhood and the challenges of being the main caregiver running a business.

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    Text excerpt discussing challenges of motherhood, parental responsibilities, and the financial and non-financial value of stay-at-home parents.

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    Screenshot of an online comment discussing struggles of motherhood and the challenges faced by a woman fearing she won’t survive.

    Comment on a parenting forum discussing hiring a nanny to manage the challenges of motherhood and parenting stress.

    Comment by KarmaMadeMeDoIt6 sharing struggles of single motherhood and fears about surviving motherhood due to its difficulty.

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    Comment about parenting challenges from a burnt out parent fearing survival through motherhood and regretting having kids.

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    Screenshot of a social forum comment expressing relief at having cats instead of children due to the hardships of motherhood.

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    Comment on a post expressing regret, highlighting a woman’s fear she won’t survive motherhood due to its difficulties.

    Screenshot of an online comment expressing frustration about having children, related to fears of surviving motherhood challenges.

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    Nikita Manot

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    Nikita Manot

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    What do you think ?
    Melissa Harris
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is the reason I don't have/want children. I know it would break my mental health and I wouldn't be able to be the parent my child(ren) deserved. I'm AuADHD and it's already a full time job just managing myself.

    Randomosity
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's the same with me. I'm lazy, selfish and impatient and would make a terrible mother. Plus, I don't like kids or babies.

    Load More Replies...
    Rathoren
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Everyone always says i would change my mind about babies/kids if they were my own. No, no i would not, im short tempered because of stress and dont have the mental capacity to take care of kids. It wouldn't be fair to them or me. And that's fine, society needs to start recognizing a woman is complete without marriage or children!

    The Other Guest
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "It's different when they're your own" yeah, you can't get away from them. Beside, if that statement were true, there'd be a lot fewer abu‍se‍d kids in the world.

    Load More Replies...
    camomooey
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wish I would have known before I had a kid just how much I would hate it. I love my son, but I hated being a mom. I should never have had a kid. The only saving grace is that I realized it after and made sure I never had a second one.

    Carrie Laughs
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Friend of mine is the same. She loves her child, but hates being a parent. If she'd known what it was really like, she says she''d have made a different choice. There needs to be more transparency, more openness about how, for many, the lovely moments don't make up for the rest of it. It's okay to say 'I don't like this'. As long as you do the best you can for your child, and love them. Too many aren't.

    Load More Replies...
    Heather Menard
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My mother didn't want kids and she treated me as something she had to take care of but never there emotionally.

    T'Mar of Vulcan
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Parents who let their toddlers scream, climb on them, etc., are nuts. My parents never let me do that. What's with people just letting their kids go wild?

    StrangeOne
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think she means in the morning or relaxation time when you're with your kids just goofing around. Not out in public at a restaurant, or other places and times that is inappropriate. Me and my half bro, his mom let us go jump on our dad to wake him up for his shift. He seemed to love it. But every family is different.

    Load More Replies...
    Lynchamigsakta
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I mean this just sounds like perfectly normal venting from someone that's exhausted right now. And it also describes all the reasons I don't want kids because I don't see any way I could cope with living like this

    StrangeOne
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This sounds like post-partum depression. Lack of motivation and energy to do mundane, daily tasks, even with hired help. Resenting the fact the kids are there to be taken care of, but still love them very much. Apologetic to the husband who should help out more, despite her saying he does a lot but "he's better at setting boundaries.". Clearly he could do a bit better. Too tired to enjoy an extra couple of hours to herself. It may get a bit easier later but it's going to get a bit harder in some aspects, too.

    B.Nelson
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My parents recorded 6 hours of kids shows and showed my 5 year old brother how to use the VCR. That way when he woke up at 5 am, he could go watch some shows. Joke son him though: now his kids do the same thing to him

    Robyn Hill
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ALL of this is exactly why I never wanted kids and never had kids. I can’t tolerate them, and all that comes with them. Just - no. My cats are too much sometimes!

    Noelle Greeley
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And this is why I had my tubes removed when I was 36. And before that I always used birth control and other forms of contraception! My mental health would never be able to handle having children. I have a nephew who is 9 and he is amazing but it's also amazing when he goes back to his mother, lol. Kudos to all the parents out there who are doing amazing jobs, I could never do what you do!

    Trillian
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I see the point and for various reasons would not have kids if I had to live my life over again, although I love mine more than anything. But still she spends a lot of time defending the husband and blaming herself. No, you don't need to 'communicate better' when he is sitting around while you run yourself into the ground and just bc he makes more money doesn't mean he gets to just chill while you do it all.

    SchadenFreudian Psychology
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I’m so glad I didn’t have kids. I don’t think I could have handled it. It would have been the worst experience of my life. And besides, look at the world we’re bringing kids into. Everybody deserves better than this.

    Gozer LeGozerian
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If only people who want to be parents would consider it as much as people who don't want to, these situations wouldn't happen as much

    Debbie
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Do you love everything you do every day equally? Or are there days that you just don't feel like it? Even if you want kids and love your kids you can get overwhelmed! Just like people who are having a burnout from work.

    Load More Replies...
    Marnie
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The only reason a person WFH should be expected to do more around the house is just due to no commute. If one spouse spends 40 minutes a day in commute, the other spouse could maybe do an extra 20-30 minutes of chores. (Commuting while listening to music or a podcast is a lot more relaxing and enjoyable than doing chores, so they shouldn't have to do the extra same amount.) But you shouldn't be doing chores WHILE you're WFH, that's cheating (unless you're making up the time, treating it as a break).

    Mark Childers
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I knew I'd be a deadbeat dad like my father, so I never wanted that. Not one cell of my body wanted to be a father to a human. But I love being a cat dad. I spoil them rotten, am around them all day and spend a lot of time interacting and playing with them. I talk to them throughout the day. I have deep connections with them and all the patience in the world. But a screaming kid sends me from 0 to 100 in a nanosecond. I have no patience for kids.

    C. S. M
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    58, childfree male, by choice, here. I knew since early teens I didn't want children. They're loud, messy, smelly, disruptive, expensive, destructive... I despised people who automatically said, "Oh, you'll change your mind." I never did, and I now mock those people. I never understood the 'automatic' desire to procreate that so many subscribe to. Family pressure or "It's what you should do" never held any sway with me. I'd have been a terrible father, as well. Being the end of my own father's bloodline is satisfying enough to me.

    Zarra
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I make $92 an hour to work part time on a laptop. I never thought it was possible but my closest friend easily made $26,000 in 3 weeks with this top offer and she delighted me to join. .Visit the following article for new information on how to access.. HERE_____ j­o­b­a­t­H­o­m­e­1.C­o­m

    cholera epidemic
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As someone who has a baby brother and often takes care of him I'm pretty sure I've had enough of children for a lifetime 😅

    Ray Bolen
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sounds like she just wanted to vent.

    RS
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I have a toddler and yeah it's tough but i think once we're through the highly dependent age range it gets easier. This too shall pass and all that. Of course i respect kids aren't for everyone.

    April Pickett
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you have children, you raise children. The catch is teaching your children the right way to behave. You should pay attention to them, participate with them, take them places, teach them manners and restraint. Yes, all the bad stuff still happens, but those are opportunities to teach kids how to and how not to behave. If you leave a vaccuum, they will fill it their way, and you won't like it. They need boundaries and you have to set them. For God's sake, do not do the "poor pitiful me" routine. You need to get out of your life and into theirs.

    Alexandra
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Perhaps people should follow a few pre-parenting classes, just so they can get a more realistic view of what it means to have a child and how it affects your mental health, your relationship, your finances, your work. Unlike the previous generation, the current crop of grandparents are less inclined to be unpaid babysitters. They often have more money now and want to spend it on travel, all the things they want and should do now before age and decrepitude sets in.

    Chris Jones
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As more couples have to work full time and can't afford nursery care, a lot of grandparents are there filling the gap. Pre-parenting classes? You mean there are classes for people who aren't sure whether to become parents or not? When I google it I get: "Pre-parenting classes, also known as antenatal classes, prepare expectant parents..." Not people who aren't sure 🤷

    Load More Replies...
    Debbie
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The title is misleading. She does not hate being a mom. She is overwhelmed with the current situation. Parenting is a full time job. Then there is keeping the house in order. And both parent work so it's like 3 full time jobs for 2 people. It will get easier when the kids grow older.

    Astrid
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This stage doesn't last forever. But timing is everything. The five year old will be becoming more independent because of school. They are much easier then, they learn from the older ones. But babies are hard work. By having her kids when she did she's got another 3.5 years until things are much much easier.

    StrangeOne
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It can get easier much sooner if she gets the amount of help and support than she has now. She may not realize it, or in denial, that she's being way too lenient on her husband just because he works. A job allows income to be brought it, but that is just a part of life in human society. Sure, work can be hard, but it's time away from your family, too. But OP is on the clock 24/7, doing things alone. At least she has the luxury to have hired help, but that's only some of the time and still takes away from the sense of the feeling of being a cohesive family unit with her husband and kids. Raising kids is a lot of work, but it shouldn't feel like it's separate from your area of desired, free life, as if it were life a grueling 9-5 job with double overtime with little compensation and benefits. If it feels like the latter, then the family dynamics that have been created are off-kilter. One of the parents is going to feel resentment and leaning on being a single parent in a 2 parent home.

    Load More Replies...
    NJ P
    Community Member
    2 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Fault of the parents for not disciplining to stop wild behavior. I and my 6 siblings were brought up being spanked for bad behavior and I don't see anything wrong with it. Big difference between punishment and a***e. Today's parents too permissive and children growing up entitled and rude and just horrible people.

    Tamra
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A parent can discipline a child without hitting them. Parents who hit their kids are overwhelmed, ignorant, or have anger issues. It's not necessary.

    Load More Replies...
    FreeTheUnicorn
    Community Member
    2 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Had OP ever been around children? What did she think would happen? And how can she possibly justify keeping the first one and having a second when she's just resenting them for years. That messes people up for their whole lives, all because I assume she doesn't want to admit she was wrong? They could have loving parents I stead of resentful ones. This woman is a sociipath who thinks she deserves sympathy while having no concerns for her kids. They want for nothing, but have to live with the knowledge their mother resents them for being a child. There no thought at all about finding them a better home. She's willingly screwing up her kids to save face.

    Gozer LeGozerian
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Let's not throw around diagnoses with zero qualifications and based on very little information. Sometimes people are just plain jerks

    Load More Replies...
    Melissa Harris
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This is the reason I don't have/want children. I know it would break my mental health and I wouldn't be able to be the parent my child(ren) deserved. I'm AuADHD and it's already a full time job just managing myself.

    Randomosity
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's the same with me. I'm lazy, selfish and impatient and would make a terrible mother. Plus, I don't like kids or babies.

    Load More Replies...
    Rathoren
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Everyone always says i would change my mind about babies/kids if they were my own. No, no i would not, im short tempered because of stress and dont have the mental capacity to take care of kids. It wouldn't be fair to them or me. And that's fine, society needs to start recognizing a woman is complete without marriage or children!

    The Other Guest
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "It's different when they're your own" yeah, you can't get away from them. Beside, if that statement were true, there'd be a lot fewer abu‍se‍d kids in the world.

    Load More Replies...
    camomooey
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I wish I would have known before I had a kid just how much I would hate it. I love my son, but I hated being a mom. I should never have had a kid. The only saving grace is that I realized it after and made sure I never had a second one.

    Carrie Laughs
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Friend of mine is the same. She loves her child, but hates being a parent. If she'd known what it was really like, she says she''d have made a different choice. There needs to be more transparency, more openness about how, for many, the lovely moments don't make up for the rest of it. It's okay to say 'I don't like this'. As long as you do the best you can for your child, and love them. Too many aren't.

    Load More Replies...
    Heather Menard
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My mother didn't want kids and she treated me as something she had to take care of but never there emotionally.

    T'Mar of Vulcan
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Parents who let their toddlers scream, climb on them, etc., are nuts. My parents never let me do that. What's with people just letting their kids go wild?

    StrangeOne
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I think she means in the morning or relaxation time when you're with your kids just goofing around. Not out in public at a restaurant, or other places and times that is inappropriate. Me and my half bro, his mom let us go jump on our dad to wake him up for his shift. He seemed to love it. But every family is different.

    Load More Replies...
    Lynchamigsakta
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I mean this just sounds like perfectly normal venting from someone that's exhausted right now. And it also describes all the reasons I don't want kids because I don't see any way I could cope with living like this

    StrangeOne
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This sounds like post-partum depression. Lack of motivation and energy to do mundane, daily tasks, even with hired help. Resenting the fact the kids are there to be taken care of, but still love them very much. Apologetic to the husband who should help out more, despite her saying he does a lot but "he's better at setting boundaries.". Clearly he could do a bit better. Too tired to enjoy an extra couple of hours to herself. It may get a bit easier later but it's going to get a bit harder in some aspects, too.

    B.Nelson
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My parents recorded 6 hours of kids shows and showed my 5 year old brother how to use the VCR. That way when he woke up at 5 am, he could go watch some shows. Joke son him though: now his kids do the same thing to him

    Robyn Hill
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    ALL of this is exactly why I never wanted kids and never had kids. I can’t tolerate them, and all that comes with them. Just - no. My cats are too much sometimes!

    Noelle Greeley
    Community Member
    Premium
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    And this is why I had my tubes removed when I was 36. And before that I always used birth control and other forms of contraception! My mental health would never be able to handle having children. I have a nephew who is 9 and he is amazing but it's also amazing when he goes back to his mother, lol. Kudos to all the parents out there who are doing amazing jobs, I could never do what you do!

    Trillian
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I see the point and for various reasons would not have kids if I had to live my life over again, although I love mine more than anything. But still she spends a lot of time defending the husband and blaming herself. No, you don't need to 'communicate better' when he is sitting around while you run yourself into the ground and just bc he makes more money doesn't mean he gets to just chill while you do it all.

    SchadenFreudian Psychology
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I’m so glad I didn’t have kids. I don’t think I could have handled it. It would have been the worst experience of my life. And besides, look at the world we’re bringing kids into. Everybody deserves better than this.

    Gozer LeGozerian
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If only people who want to be parents would consider it as much as people who don't want to, these situations wouldn't happen as much

    Debbie
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Do you love everything you do every day equally? Or are there days that you just don't feel like it? Even if you want kids and love your kids you can get overwhelmed! Just like people who are having a burnout from work.

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    Marnie
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The only reason a person WFH should be expected to do more around the house is just due to no commute. If one spouse spends 40 minutes a day in commute, the other spouse could maybe do an extra 20-30 minutes of chores. (Commuting while listening to music or a podcast is a lot more relaxing and enjoyable than doing chores, so they shouldn't have to do the extra same amount.) But you shouldn't be doing chores WHILE you're WFH, that's cheating (unless you're making up the time, treating it as a break).

    Mark Childers
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I knew I'd be a deadbeat dad like my father, so I never wanted that. Not one cell of my body wanted to be a father to a human. But I love being a cat dad. I spoil them rotten, am around them all day and spend a lot of time interacting and playing with them. I talk to them throughout the day. I have deep connections with them and all the patience in the world. But a screaming kid sends me from 0 to 100 in a nanosecond. I have no patience for kids.

    C. S. M
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    58, childfree male, by choice, here. I knew since early teens I didn't want children. They're loud, messy, smelly, disruptive, expensive, destructive... I despised people who automatically said, "Oh, you'll change your mind." I never did, and I now mock those people. I never understood the 'automatic' desire to procreate that so many subscribe to. Family pressure or "It's what you should do" never held any sway with me. I'd have been a terrible father, as well. Being the end of my own father's bloodline is satisfying enough to me.

    Zarra
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I make $92 an hour to work part time on a laptop. I never thought it was possible but my closest friend easily made $26,000 in 3 weeks with this top offer and she delighted me to join. .Visit the following article for new information on how to access.. HERE_____ j­o­b­a­t­H­o­m­e­1.C­o­m

    cholera epidemic
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As someone who has a baby brother and often takes care of him I'm pretty sure I've had enough of children for a lifetime 😅

    Ray Bolen
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Sounds like she just wanted to vent.

    RS
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I have a toddler and yeah it's tough but i think once we're through the highly dependent age range it gets easier. This too shall pass and all that. Of course i respect kids aren't for everyone.

    April Pickett
    Community Member
    2 months ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    If you have children, you raise children. The catch is teaching your children the right way to behave. You should pay attention to them, participate with them, take them places, teach them manners and restraint. Yes, all the bad stuff still happens, but those are opportunities to teach kids how to and how not to behave. If you leave a vaccuum, they will fill it their way, and you won't like it. They need boundaries and you have to set them. For God's sake, do not do the "poor pitiful me" routine. You need to get out of your life and into theirs.

    Alexandra
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Perhaps people should follow a few pre-parenting classes, just so they can get a more realistic view of what it means to have a child and how it affects your mental health, your relationship, your finances, your work. Unlike the previous generation, the current crop of grandparents are less inclined to be unpaid babysitters. They often have more money now and want to spend it on travel, all the things they want and should do now before age and decrepitude sets in.

    Chris Jones
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    As more couples have to work full time and can't afford nursery care, a lot of grandparents are there filling the gap. Pre-parenting classes? You mean there are classes for people who aren't sure whether to become parents or not? When I google it I get: "Pre-parenting classes, also known as antenatal classes, prepare expectant parents..." Not people who aren't sure 🤷

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    Debbie
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The title is misleading. She does not hate being a mom. She is overwhelmed with the current situation. Parenting is a full time job. Then there is keeping the house in order. And both parent work so it's like 3 full time jobs for 2 people. It will get easier when the kids grow older.

    Astrid
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This stage doesn't last forever. But timing is everything. The five year old will be becoming more independent because of school. They are much easier then, they learn from the older ones. But babies are hard work. By having her kids when she did she's got another 3.5 years until things are much much easier.

    StrangeOne
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It can get easier much sooner if she gets the amount of help and support than she has now. She may not realize it, or in denial, that she's being way too lenient on her husband just because he works. A job allows income to be brought it, but that is just a part of life in human society. Sure, work can be hard, but it's time away from your family, too. But OP is on the clock 24/7, doing things alone. At least she has the luxury to have hired help, but that's only some of the time and still takes away from the sense of the feeling of being a cohesive family unit with her husband and kids. Raising kids is a lot of work, but it shouldn't feel like it's separate from your area of desired, free life, as if it were life a grueling 9-5 job with double overtime with little compensation and benefits. If it feels like the latter, then the family dynamics that have been created are off-kilter. One of the parents is going to feel resentment and leaning on being a single parent in a 2 parent home.

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    NJ P
    Community Member
    2 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Fault of the parents for not disciplining to stop wild behavior. I and my 6 siblings were brought up being spanked for bad behavior and I don't see anything wrong with it. Big difference between punishment and a***e. Today's parents too permissive and children growing up entitled and rude and just horrible people.

    Tamra
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    A parent can discipline a child without hitting them. Parents who hit their kids are overwhelmed, ignorant, or have anger issues. It's not necessary.

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    FreeTheUnicorn
    Community Member
    2 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Had OP ever been around children? What did she think would happen? And how can she possibly justify keeping the first one and having a second when she's just resenting them for years. That messes people up for their whole lives, all because I assume she doesn't want to admit she was wrong? They could have loving parents I stead of resentful ones. This woman is a sociipath who thinks she deserves sympathy while having no concerns for her kids. They want for nothing, but have to live with the knowledge their mother resents them for being a child. There no thought at all about finding them a better home. She's willingly screwing up her kids to save face.

    Gozer LeGozerian
    Community Member
    2 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Let's not throw around diagnoses with zero qualifications and based on very little information. Sometimes people are just plain jerks

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