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There’s an episode of How I Met Your Mother where Barney and Robin realize they’ve become completely unrecognizable and miserable. If you were a fan of the series, you probably know what I'm talking about. Season 5, Episode 7 was called "The Rough Patch." And rightfully so. It showed how each half of the once fabulous and feisty couple had lost sight of who they were before they dated. Barney and Robin had both become sloppy, overweight, and lazy.

While the comedy series makes light of just how drastically dating can change us, in reality, it’s no laughing matter. Being in a relationship that doesn’t bring out the best in you can have some major repercussions on your mind, body, and soul. And once you finally find your way out, it can take months or even years to heal.

People have been sharing very sobering then and now photos, highlighting what they looked like in their last relationship vs single - now. It's part of a viral TikTok trend where netizens reveal why they quickly change their minds about wanting a relationship... whenever they remember "How The Last One Had Me Looking.” There are loads of videos doing the rounds. But Bored Panda has picked out the top ones for anyone who needs some breaking up or staying single inspiration. 

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    #2

    Man in a car, looking calm; next to him looking distressed, highlighting single versus relationship appearance.

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    Ben Aziza
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What the F did greynook do to get downvoted for showing sympathy?

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    #3

    Woman smiling outdoors single vs. happy in a relationship with baby, showcasing life changes.

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    Jenn Smith
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Beautiful baby and beautiful Mama. Before and after!

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    It's called a toxic relationship for a reason. Dating or loving the wrong person can be poisonous. It can impact your life, your career, your mind, body, and soul. Sometimes, the consequences don't show up for a while. But when they do, they're clear as day. If you don't believe us, look no further than a TikTok trend where people are showing what they looked like in their last relationship versus now.

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    #5

    Woman showing a difference in appearance when single versus in a relationship, highlighting stress impact.

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    StrangeOne
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Her eyes look like mine when I get in contact with an allergen. But that looks like severe sleep deprivation.

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    #6

    Comparison of two photos showing a woman single vs. in a relationship with humorous text overlay.

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    Lyoness
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Wow, what a difference. She looks so much happier.

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    It can be hard to believe some of these folk are indeed the same person. Many look like they've entered an extreme makeover challenge, done a Benjamin Button on us, and achieved the world's best glow-up. It's not too hard to imagine why they're rethinking getting into another relationship after remembering what the last one did to them.

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    #7

    Woman single vs. in a relationship: relaxed pose and with baby in arms, reflecting on wanting another child.

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    Ellinor
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Remember everyone, you are allowed to complain about parenthood. It doesn't mean that you don't love your kids, it just means that taking care of a human being is very hard and demanding. People judging parents who express their struggles are not the good people they think they are.

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    #8

    Comparison of someone single vs. in a relationship, with different outfits and expressions in each photo.

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    GREYNOOK
    Community Member
    8 months ago

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    the last one made you look like "MOANA" 😳

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    #9

    Man showing single vs. relationship look; left in glasses and jacket, right in white shirt on beach holding phone.

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    Jenn Smith
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Very nice looking young man. Keep up the good work!

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    Toxic relationships are unhealthy for various reasons. They can send you spinning into a state of anxiety, depression, panic, and fear and completely change who you are as a person. You might have isolated yourself from family and friends. You may feel trapped like you'll never find your true self again.

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    The Calm app blog defines a toxic relationship as one that "consistently undermines your sense of wellbeing, happiness, and, at times, safety." The site explains that occasional disagreements or conflicts are normal in any relationship, "but a continual pattern of emotional harm, disrespect, and manipulation can lead to deterioration in mental and emotional health."

    #11

    Woman smiling in a car next to her photo in a cozy setting with children, illustrating single vs. relationship life.

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    Lyoness
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    This one confuses me. The last relationship had 2 kids she loves and a shorter haircut. I'm not sure why the before is bad but there isn't any context. Am I missing something?

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    #12

    Man driving a car in two photos showing contrast of being single vs. in a relationship.

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    Binky Melnik
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I know these are sad, but the way some people are able to grab themselves by their bootstraps and pull themselves back together is remarkable! I’m really happy for them!

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    If you have to ask yourself whether you're in a toxic relationship, there's a good chance you are. Or you'd be too happy to wonder about it. Some of the big red flags are that you feel unsupported. "Instead of feeling uplifted and encouraged, interactions often leave you feeling belittled, inadequate, or sabotaged," reads the Calm blog.

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    You'll likely also feel that the bad days outweigh the good days. And you are more unhappy than not. You and your partner are constantly fighting and arguing. There's a feeling of heaviness, tension, and general dissatisfaction.

    #13

    Two people sharing single vs. relationship looks; one outside in a white dress, the other in a bathroom with patterned pants.

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    Jenn Smith
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Hope you stay free. That goes double if you here in US.💯❤

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    #14

    Person looking calm while single, then crying in a relationship, highlighting contrasting emotions.

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    GREYNOOK
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    don't default back, actually delete and press forward always !👍

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    #15

    Two women sharing photos of their appearance single vs. in a relationship, showing contrast in style and expression.

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    Sunshine
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It looks like she's holding a newborn baby in the second pic. I don't think this is a fair comparison. It's caring for an infant--not being in a relationship--that causes her not to be able to follow her normal beauty routine.

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    We often hear or read that communication is key to happy and healthy relationships. In the toxic couplings, there's a clear breakdown in communication. It's marred by disrespect, insults, accusations, or even silence. There are things left unsaid, and elephants in the proverbial room. You feel unheard... and, at times, unloved.

    #16

    Woman smiling in a white dress on a balcony; another photo shows her casually in a car, capturing single vs. relationship looks.

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    Rosecrucian Roeth
    Community Member
    8 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    This comment has been deleted.

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    #17

    Person contemplating love, wearing glasses, in a split image comparing single vs. in a relationship appearance.

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    Rosecrucian Roeth
    Community Member
    8 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Go for it BUT remember, you must be in charge to the extent that you are taken advantage of, and that you are not being ridiculed and you are not being taken advantage of.

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    #18

    Two women sharing how they look single versus in a relationship, one posing with makeup and one casually dressed with a smile.

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    kzys59pcrp
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I feel like some of these people are lying

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    If your partner acts like they own you and dictates who you can see, what you can see, and how you should dress, act, or feel, consider this a huge red flag. Healthy relationships are not centered around controlling behavior and dominant dynamics.

    The same applies if your partner is a master of manipulation or is constantly gaslighting you. Or if you feel like you're walking on eggshells, always in a state of guilt. Someone who loves you will show you they care and will not disregard your emotional needs or feelings.

    #19

    Woman showing single vs. relationship look; mirror selfie in activewear and outdoor setting with dessert.

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    #20

    Woman showing change in appearance when single versus in a relationship, with text about relationship effects.

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    There's a reason the people who are taking part in the TikiTok trend look so drastically different in their "Then and Now" photos. When your emotional well-being takes a knock, your physical well-being often follows soon after.

    "The constant stress and negativity can lead to symptoms like insomnia, changes in appetite, or chronic health issues," reads the Calm blog. "Toxic relationships can cause isolation, making it harder to reach out for help when you need it most."

    #22

    Person showing contrast in appearance when single vs. in a relationship with different clothing and expressions.

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    Nick Gibbs
    Community Member
    8 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    Some of yall were lucky to have someone the way you looked in those photos

    #23

    Person showing contrast between being single and in a relationship, featuring a makeup-enhanced look and a natural look.

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    #24

    Woman shows contrast in appearance: confident when single vs. relaxed in a relationship, highlighting personal transformation.

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    kayteeisdabomb
    Community Member
    8 months ago

    This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

    so not wearing make up?

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    Many people stay in bad relationships much longer than they should. And there are various reasons... Your emotional attachment to your partner could keep you confused or stuck. Or maybe you have a fear of being alone. There could be financial reasons. Or you truly believe your partner will change.

    "The cycle of toxicity can erode self-confidence and decision-making abilities, making the prospect of leaving seem daunting or even impossible," notes the Calm site.

    The first step to getting out is to acknowledge you're in a toxic or unhealthy relationship. And then to make a decision to leave. Find support in family, friends, someone you trust, or even a professional like a therapist. Create your exit strategy taking into account things like where you'll go, what you'll say (if anything), how you'll support yourself financially and when to leave.

    #25

    Woman showing contrast of single vs. relationship appearance, wearing sunglasses in one image, and barefaced in the other.

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    #26

    Person with red braids looking confident vs. same person stressed and teary outside, highlighting single and relationship dynamics.

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    #27

    Single vs. relationship look comparison; woman smiling on left, serious on right.

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    You might choose to leave immediately and suddenly, or you could take a more gradual approach and disengage slowly. This means reducing contact with your partner and distancing yourself from the relationship.

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    The experts at Calm say this approach can be less confrontational and may give you time to adjust emotionally and logistically to the change. But if you ever feel unsafe or in danger, don't drag it out. Seek help and leave as soon as possible. Remember, you are not alone. You can and will get through this.

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    #28

    Person in a white shirt smiling in one image, with short hair in another, showing appearance change single vs. relationship.

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    #29

    Person showing contrast: smiling single vs. casual relationship look, highlighting change in mood.

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    #30

    Person showing contrast in appearance when single versus in a relationship, highlighting differences in expression and demeanor.

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    #31

    Person showing how they look single versus in a relationship, sitting in a car.

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    #32

    Person showing contrast between looking single vs. in a relationship in casual selfies.

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    #33

    Woman showing difference in appearance when single vs. in a relationship, wearing a denim jacket and tortoiseshell glasses.

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    #34

    Person showing single vs. relationship appearance, smiling on the left, serious on the right, indoors.

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    #36

    Two images of a woman in a car; showcasing her appearance while single versus in a relationship.

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    #37

    Person in white top and brown pants taking mirror selfies, highlighting appearance single vs. in a relationship.

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    Lyoness
    Community Member
    8 months ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    She looks almost the same to me, just a smaller bottom in the before picture.

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    #38

    Person showcasing appearance changes single vs. in a relationship, wearing casual outfits in different settings.

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    #40

    Person taking selfies showing their appearance single vs. in a relationship, wearing casual clothes in a bathroom setting.

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    #41

    Woman shows contrast of appearance single vs. in a relationship, wearing headphones and casual clothes.

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    #42

    Person in mirror selfies, showing contrast when single vs. in a relationship.

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    #43

    Person taking a selfie in a mirror and another smiling, representing a single versus in a relationship look comparison.

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    #44

    Person smiling vs. looking stressed; illustrating single vs. in a relationship appearances.

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