“Like A Slap In My Face”: Woman Hosts Friend For Free For 3 Days, Gets Venmo Request For $6
Interview
We can never truly know someone other than ourselves. It’s impossible to get inside another person’s head and see what they’re really thinking of. All we can do is try to determine their character through their actions and hope for the best. But, as Reddit user FixConstant8266 found out, this road can sometimes lead to disappointment.
A few days ago, she made a post on the subreddit ‘Mildly Infuriating‘ about a recent visit she had from one of her friends. The woman went above and beyond to ensure that her friend had a good time, including cooking them food and driving them around. However, after the friend left, she herself received an insulting Venmo request.
This woman hosted her friend for three days and went the extra mile to make sure she had a delightful stay
Image credits: Tech Daily (not the actual photo)
But after the friend left, she received an insulting Venmo request
After her story went viral, the woman issued a few updates on the situation
Image credits: Rachel Claire (not the actual photo)
Image credits: FixConstant8266
Sometimes, accounting for your every penny can come back to haunt you
It sounds like the Redditor’s friend has been tracking every penny of her spending. While this can help a person to stay on top of their finances, it can also lead to unexpected emotional side effects.
“When we part with our hard-earned money, the actual financial cost isn’t the only thing that matters,” Eva Krockow, a German-born, UK-dwelling psychologist and decision researcher, wrote.
Indeed, psychologist Dan Ariely argues that consumer experiences are shaped by additional factors, including the hassle of making a payment and the pain of paying.
The hassle of making a payment describes the effort associated with making a purchase and typically involves considering the payment method. For example, paying with cash may seem more cumbersome than using contact-free card payments. This is because it requires customers to carry a wallet, count out notes and coins, and ensure they receive the right amount of change. Surely a simple credit card scan is a lot less to handle?
The pain of paying refers to a ‘moral tax’ or emotional side effects that come with each payment we make. It refers to the guilt experienced when spending money or how we feel about our purchase after having parted with our cash. The pain of paying is often influenced by the timing of a purchase. For instance, many consumers experience a greater pain of spending if a purchase is made at the end of the month and happens to deplete their monthly budget, a phenomenon known as the “bottom-dollar effect.”
Image credits: Ivan (not the actual photo)
Gen Z and millennials are losing friends over spending habits
If we were to zoom out for a minute, money is getting in the way of younger generations’ friendships.
According to one study, more than one-third of Gen Z and millennials (36%) have a friend who drives them to overspend. This leads many to take on debt and in some cases, end friendships to protect their finances.
Among millennials with a profligate friend, 43% said they typically overspend on dining out or drinks and nights out (37%). Others reported more elaborate events, like trips and vacations (22%) or birthday celebrations (21%) are driving up costs. Similarly, Gen Z blamed dining out (37%) as the main reason for their overspending, while some from the cohort said they typically overspend with their friend on clothing (36%), drinks and nights out (32%), trips and vacations (24%), and even self-care (20%), including massages and manicures.
Of millennial respondents who have a spendy friend, someone who drives them to spend more money than they can afford, 88% have taken on debt as a result of being with that friend. The same is true for 80% of Gen Z respondents who have a friend that drives them to overspend. Millennials are worse off, however, with 15% admitting they’ve taken on $500 or more in debt for this, compared to just 2% of Gen Z respondents in the same boat.
There’s nothing wrong with wanting to protect your wallet when you’re out with friends. But keep in mind that so do they.
Image credits: Thirdman (not the actual photo)
People who read about the ordeal shared their suggestions for the woman on how to proceed forward
As well as other reactions to the fallout
Some said they had similar experiences
And the woman came back with one more update
Image credits: FixConstant8266
I stayed a weekend with a relatively new friend. We went to do grocery shopping for the weekend and we agreed that we half the bill afterwards. This was ok and fair in my opinion. But she bought massive amount of food and other household items. Food like for a month. Like canned goods, hygiene stuff for her and for her husband. Then she expected that I pay half of everything. I graciously declined and gave a estimated sum for the food I thought we would consume during the weekend. Some people are unbeatable!
I had a similar situation with my husband's friend. He stayed with us for a while - we had a free sofa, so why not. He treated himself to my husband's beer and my cooking. We were all students at the time, so budget was a little bit low, but he never offered to pay for anything. I asked husband to talk to him as I felt too awkward, but it went nowhere. Then, on the last day, the friend came back with a KFC bag and asked if we want some as he couldn't finished the whole bucket. Sure we did. Just as we set up some plates, he started to say "We'll you'd have to pay me X back" - I looked at him in disbelief and replied "sure, knock it off the money you owe us for bed, beer and breakfast". One of my best moments 🤣 of course no money changed hands, but to this day he won't visit us in our house. Good riddance!
For people like this, they expect others to host them, pay for things, etc. but it never crosses their mind to do the same. This friend is a taker and not a giver.
I break out in a sweat if I think I owe anyone anything. If someone treats me to such a generous stay I would definitely be buying lunch/dinner, offering petrol money and washing up/tidying or whatever else was required.
I am petty. I would've venmoed her $6.50 with a note "Keep the change."
I had a "friend" like that. She never used her own car or gave me gas money, she ordered the cheapest meal and ate half of mine too, she took money out of my wallet to tip the waiter, she hosted HER guests in MY appartment and then left with them, oh and she asked for 10ct when I used her deo. Yeah, fun times...
Maybe she budgets hard an just honestly slipped her mind as a guest what you might be out hosting and sent it like a biz expense. Hope she learns etiquette from this. An if you know anyone having plans with her subtly mention they might get a bill after an event. lol. I did have a friend that would say I owed him money from going out the next time we would meet up. Oh hey you got that $5 I loaned you for that drink? Oh sure here you go. But I caught on when just a hang out one time I wax asked the next time for $ I deff didn't borrow. I always offer gas money to someone for a trip. Hey wanna go to the mall I'll drive. Sure. Here's $10 for gas. Usually they say no. But the offer matters to me.
Some people are cheap and they don’t care that they are using other people, sometimes this is family or friends, I had an uncle that thought he had a right to steal gas from my parents cars, that is 50 years ago when it was easy to open the gas tanks.
I would‘ve reacted the same way as her. She was a nice and generous host. As a guest i‘d be more than happy to invite her to dinner or get her a gift as a thank you. It‘s not about the money, but about thankfulness and generosity to a friend, who deserves this. This person sure is not.
Someone gifted a friend of mine two tickets for a music festival. She asked me if I wanted to go with her, I agreed. She told me that since she was putting the tickets, I should pay for the food and the transport to the place. I though we were going to split those things so I told her that I didn't had much money for that so I declined. She wanted everything free!!! Tickets, transport, food, prfffff no way. I was so mad with her, our friendship declined from there.
It cost $6 to find out your friend is a POS. That's pretty cheap. Some people find out the hard way, like finding your friend on top of your spouse/partner in their birthday suits.
I used to spend long vacations with my friend's family in the South of France. I came with expensive gifts, I bought part of the groceries, bought smth nice for them and their house and so on because they would never think to mention money. You can enjoy a free stay for couple of days but if it is longer, start participating. And never under any circumstances try to get any kind of money out of the people who are your friends and kind hosts.
I have a friend staying with me this week so he can go hunting. The first day we had hamburgers (mine) day two he had shot some partridge, and we had those with some potatoes that my mom had left me, day 3 he had brought steaks, day 4 I had a frozen pizza in my freezer, (I just moved recently, which he helped me with, so not much in my house, and not many things unpacked) yesterday we went to the local hotel restaurant and I paid, and today we went to his former coworkers house for moose roast. Ironically he had taken out a beef roast this morning too that he had bought so I cooked it, then he got back and said the guy he had even hunting with this week finally got a moose, and another one! So the beef roast will be for tomorrow. I’d say we are pretty even at this point, steaks and roasts are expensive! Also he’s been helping me out with stuff around the house while he’s been here. Got my satellite up! Yeay!
Plot twist: The real conundrum is that we engage with this sort of content.
I think it's funny how so many people advise to cut someone out of their life for $6. Not sure how I would react because this doesn't seem like something guys do. But a phone call with 'I am not sending you $6' would have been my choice. If I could pay $6 to have close friends visit I would consider that a bargain even if it cost me a lot more in incidentals. Friends aren't easy to find. Do not lose one over $6.
It's the principal of it, and how the friend disregarded all the effort she put in.
Load More Replies... I stayed a weekend with a relatively new friend. We went to do grocery shopping for the weekend and we agreed that we half the bill afterwards. This was ok and fair in my opinion. But she bought massive amount of food and other household items. Food like for a month. Like canned goods, hygiene stuff for her and for her husband. Then she expected that I pay half of everything. I graciously declined and gave a estimated sum for the food I thought we would consume during the weekend. Some people are unbeatable!
I had a similar situation with my husband's friend. He stayed with us for a while - we had a free sofa, so why not. He treated himself to my husband's beer and my cooking. We were all students at the time, so budget was a little bit low, but he never offered to pay for anything. I asked husband to talk to him as I felt too awkward, but it went nowhere. Then, on the last day, the friend came back with a KFC bag and asked if we want some as he couldn't finished the whole bucket. Sure we did. Just as we set up some plates, he started to say "We'll you'd have to pay me X back" - I looked at him in disbelief and replied "sure, knock it off the money you owe us for bed, beer and breakfast". One of my best moments 🤣 of course no money changed hands, but to this day he won't visit us in our house. Good riddance!
For people like this, they expect others to host them, pay for things, etc. but it never crosses their mind to do the same. This friend is a taker and not a giver.
I break out in a sweat if I think I owe anyone anything. If someone treats me to such a generous stay I would definitely be buying lunch/dinner, offering petrol money and washing up/tidying or whatever else was required.
I am petty. I would've venmoed her $6.50 with a note "Keep the change."
I had a "friend" like that. She never used her own car or gave me gas money, she ordered the cheapest meal and ate half of mine too, she took money out of my wallet to tip the waiter, she hosted HER guests in MY appartment and then left with them, oh and she asked for 10ct when I used her deo. Yeah, fun times...
Maybe she budgets hard an just honestly slipped her mind as a guest what you might be out hosting and sent it like a biz expense. Hope she learns etiquette from this. An if you know anyone having plans with her subtly mention they might get a bill after an event. lol. I did have a friend that would say I owed him money from going out the next time we would meet up. Oh hey you got that $5 I loaned you for that drink? Oh sure here you go. But I caught on when just a hang out one time I wax asked the next time for $ I deff didn't borrow. I always offer gas money to someone for a trip. Hey wanna go to the mall I'll drive. Sure. Here's $10 for gas. Usually they say no. But the offer matters to me.
Some people are cheap and they don’t care that they are using other people, sometimes this is family or friends, I had an uncle that thought he had a right to steal gas from my parents cars, that is 50 years ago when it was easy to open the gas tanks.
I would‘ve reacted the same way as her. She was a nice and generous host. As a guest i‘d be more than happy to invite her to dinner or get her a gift as a thank you. It‘s not about the money, but about thankfulness and generosity to a friend, who deserves this. This person sure is not.
Someone gifted a friend of mine two tickets for a music festival. She asked me if I wanted to go with her, I agreed. She told me that since she was putting the tickets, I should pay for the food and the transport to the place. I though we were going to split those things so I told her that I didn't had much money for that so I declined. She wanted everything free!!! Tickets, transport, food, prfffff no way. I was so mad with her, our friendship declined from there.
It cost $6 to find out your friend is a POS. That's pretty cheap. Some people find out the hard way, like finding your friend on top of your spouse/partner in their birthday suits.
I used to spend long vacations with my friend's family in the South of France. I came with expensive gifts, I bought part of the groceries, bought smth nice for them and their house and so on because they would never think to mention money. You can enjoy a free stay for couple of days but if it is longer, start participating. And never under any circumstances try to get any kind of money out of the people who are your friends and kind hosts.
I have a friend staying with me this week so he can go hunting. The first day we had hamburgers (mine) day two he had shot some partridge, and we had those with some potatoes that my mom had left me, day 3 he had brought steaks, day 4 I had a frozen pizza in my freezer, (I just moved recently, which he helped me with, so not much in my house, and not many things unpacked) yesterday we went to the local hotel restaurant and I paid, and today we went to his former coworkers house for moose roast. Ironically he had taken out a beef roast this morning too that he had bought so I cooked it, then he got back and said the guy he had even hunting with this week finally got a moose, and another one! So the beef roast will be for tomorrow. I’d say we are pretty even at this point, steaks and roasts are expensive! Also he’s been helping me out with stuff around the house while he’s been here. Got my satellite up! Yeay!
Plot twist: The real conundrum is that we engage with this sort of content.
I think it's funny how so many people advise to cut someone out of their life for $6. Not sure how I would react because this doesn't seem like something guys do. But a phone call with 'I am not sending you $6' would have been my choice. If I could pay $6 to have close friends visit I would consider that a bargain even if it cost me a lot more in incidentals. Friends aren't easy to find. Do not lose one over $6.
It's the principal of it, and how the friend disregarded all the effort she put in.
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