This Tumblr Dedicated To Ugly Babies In Renaissance Paintings Is The Funniest Thing You’ll See All Day
The Renaissance is often perceived as the period of the noblest traditions, but some artists from that time had repeatedly been doing something that looks somewhat sinister nowadays - they painted our beloved beautiful babies like mini versions of old men. Tumblr account 'Ugly Renaissance Babies' is doing exactly what its name suggests - collecting the ugliest baby artworks from the said era, hilariously proving that some painters probably had never laid their eyes on a cute, fat baby. On the other hand, this weird Renaissance art depiction of baby Jesus might stem from the belief that he was born formed like an adult and didn't change much growing. Following this, all the other ugly babies were painted in the same manner.
From rock-hard abs to getting stoned like a gravel road, these Benjamin Button fellas seem to be hitting puberty a lot faster than we did. Scroll down to poke some fun at the Renaissance paintings, er, I mean, learn some art history and vote for your favorite funny babies!
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Is it a baby? Is it a sausage roll? Who knows. Either way, it's far too scary to risk giving it your tit!
Oh my... The woman's face isn't half bad, but what the hell happened with that thing on her shoulder?
*record scratch, freeze frame* yup that's me. you're probably wondering how I got in this situation.
*derp intensifies* no choild. stahp. yuo doing meh a concern. no heckin bamboozle.
My oh My! at first I thought they were just painting his nails which is strange because that would mean that he has three feet. I need more sleep..
That's one of the requirements for Jewish men. The ceremony is called a Bris.
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It's bad enough you're trimming my d**k, you don't need to crush my head too!
I'm way more disturbed by the way they seem to have crushed his skull totally flat - way more than the fact that it's a painting of a circumcision....
The mohel looks like he's about to doze off and the baby looks like he's doing a stand up routine.
Ah, a perfect baby, a blessing from God, made in his image....................., oh wait, God got this part wrong, we must cut it off!
All those commenting that Jesus was Jewish - yeah, if he existed, he sure was. Fact is - this aint Jesus. The clothing worn by the rabbi, mother & father should tell you that.
FYI: Rabbis do not perform circumcisions. That ain't no rabbi anyway.
Load More Replies... That's just such a magnificent cup waiting to catch the foreskin. Probably 14 Karat.
Another POI... Jews were not the only people who were circumcised.
It looks like the ma and da have literally just woken up 90 seconds before!! They're wrecked looking!!!
He comes to save the world and first thing they do is castrate the poor guy. 🙄
Depends on what you mean as early. In Jewish babies, circumcision is performed 8 days after the birth. As for these people, I have no idea what the hell they are.
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If this is depicting the Christ child then it’s a Jewish ceremony.
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Molly, you need to do some research. Circumcision is central to Judaism, there's even a ceremony dedicated to it, called a bris.
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"My lord, it's just an eye. The gods saw fit to grace me with a spare. And may I say King Leonidas, you legs are so smooth."
Looks like a little merman... or those paper thingies people put on turkey legs. Just looked it up: turkey booties or turkey frills. Okay.
Well, dont laugh so hard. people posting on social media look the same or worse than these demonic babies if not for the Photoshop . Yes, you too
At medicine faculty, our professor told us about unintended depicting of different diseases on rennaisance and baroq paintworks. This is Klippel-Feil syndrome.
This is the first picture where the children look like actual children, not like something from a horror movie.
Whao! well Saint Anne being Jesus Grand-Ma, her grip explain all the muscle the baby seems to have: Jesus inherit her super muscular strenght
I dunno who or what is holding the baby Jesus. But it's got too many fingers!
Did they ever actually met a baby? This is not a baby, this is a very small adult
Baby Jesus is squishing that poor bird (a barn swallow?), and it looks like he's got another one in his mouth.
The captions disappointed me. Some of the pictures held way more potential.
Nothing stopping you adding your own to the comments underneath the pics. I await your inspired witticisms...
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Wow. We've come along way in the art of painting babies... That's what I took from this.
I think that all those artists painted their own faces on the babies. Haha
I guess some were painted by monks who didn't have a lot of women or babies around.
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Omg, those would probably give me nightmares. Were the babies so ugly back in those days. I mean, they are babies, you can't expect them to be handsome but never the less...
Well Christ was supposed to have been born looking like an adult and other paintings then copied that man baby style. It's only recently that we thought of babies as cute.
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It is interesting how little most of these babies look like their mothers.
Actually, youngest babies just plain didn't live very long. Mothers were NOT keen on dragging them around to monasteries or messy studios. Heads weren't painted at the same time as bodies which were usually of older toddlers.
Goddamit, this should be in the deep web .. Well, good old middle ages, when even babies were creepy and horrifying as much as everything else.
How come human beings couldn't paint or draw an accurate image (I'm not saying these are but hey're getting there) of a human figure until the Renaissance? People in ancient times could sculpt accurately, almost at the level of modern times. But two-dimensional art by modern standards took millenia to progress from stick figures to child-like drawings to cartoon-like pictures to accurate representations to photorealistic drawings. The only answer I ever got was that artists and art collectors followed the style of the times so the accurate stuff is lost to history. I don't buy that malarkey. Any ideas?
Hello Black Dahlia, good question. I think (but can't say with 100% certainty) that it could be because the artists from the 300s until the Renaissance had different aesthetic priorities. The Roman Empire and the High Renaissance on tended to be more interested in the physical world and therefore valued an empirical, sensory based approach to art. Whereas starting with the introduction of Christianity in the late Roman Empire and persisting well into the late Medieval period, artists considered the senses as illusory (similar to Plato in many ways) and potentially leading us to sin, and Heaven preferable to the suffering, pain and shame of earthly life. As a result, they were more interested in symbolic depiction, rather than realistically rendering the subject, which to them was of low priority.
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I dunno what people are talking about. These are incredibly apt depictions of human babies.
I couldn’t agree more! Beyoncé should’ve hired an artist like these to paint her maternity pictures.
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Whenever I'm feeling down I look at ugly Renaissance babies' pictures and they make it all better. It's like the artists were not even trying anymore.
My parents ALWAYS sent these museum cards at Christmas. As a child , I always found these infants super ugly, &, some even scared me !
Babies can be ugly... Why shouldn't art reflect that? I've seen several ugly babies/kids today in the underground.
The dearth of art history education in this source fails to surprise. Idiot.
people seriously enjoy this? well to each their own i guess.....
The comments do nothing for me, but I do like looking at art fails.
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Why do liberals hate Christianity so much? Because Christian doctrine doesn't fit to their extreme agenda. Merry Christmas everyone and God Bless America!!!!!!!!!!! That should get Libs riled up lol.
Because too many christians no longer follow Christ's teachings. Christianity today is no more than pissing other people off, as your lame comment proves.
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I am officially so disgusted. Couldn't even finish this post till the end!
The captions disappointed me. Some of the pictures held way more potential.
Nothing stopping you adding your own to the comments underneath the pics. I await your inspired witticisms...
Load More Replies... Wow. We've come along way in the art of painting babies... That's what I took from this.
I think that all those artists painted their own faces on the babies. Haha
I guess some were painted by monks who didn't have a lot of women or babies around.
Load More Replies... Omg, those would probably give me nightmares. Were the babies so ugly back in those days. I mean, they are babies, you can't expect them to be handsome but never the less...
Well Christ was supposed to have been born looking like an adult and other paintings then copied that man baby style. It's only recently that we thought of babies as cute.
Load More Replies... It is interesting how little most of these babies look like their mothers.
Actually, youngest babies just plain didn't live very long. Mothers were NOT keen on dragging them around to monasteries or messy studios. Heads weren't painted at the same time as bodies which were usually of older toddlers.
Goddamit, this should be in the deep web .. Well, good old middle ages, when even babies were creepy and horrifying as much as everything else.
How come human beings couldn't paint or draw an accurate image (I'm not saying these are but hey're getting there) of a human figure until the Renaissance? People in ancient times could sculpt accurately, almost at the level of modern times. But two-dimensional art by modern standards took millenia to progress from stick figures to child-like drawings to cartoon-like pictures to accurate representations to photorealistic drawings. The only answer I ever got was that artists and art collectors followed the style of the times so the accurate stuff is lost to history. I don't buy that malarkey. Any ideas?
Hello Black Dahlia, good question. I think (but can't say with 100% certainty) that it could be because the artists from the 300s until the Renaissance had different aesthetic priorities. The Roman Empire and the High Renaissance on tended to be more interested in the physical world and therefore valued an empirical, sensory based approach to art. Whereas starting with the introduction of Christianity in the late Roman Empire and persisting well into the late Medieval period, artists considered the senses as illusory (similar to Plato in many ways) and potentially leading us to sin, and Heaven preferable to the suffering, pain and shame of earthly life. As a result, they were more interested in symbolic depiction, rather than realistically rendering the subject, which to them was of low priority.
Load More Replies... I dunno what people are talking about. These are incredibly apt depictions of human babies.
I couldn’t agree more! Beyoncé should’ve hired an artist like these to paint her maternity pictures.
Load More Replies... Whenever I'm feeling down I look at ugly Renaissance babies' pictures and they make it all better. It's like the artists were not even trying anymore.
My parents ALWAYS sent these museum cards at Christmas. As a child , I always found these infants super ugly, &, some even scared me !
Babies can be ugly... Why shouldn't art reflect that? I've seen several ugly babies/kids today in the underground.
The dearth of art history education in this source fails to surprise. Idiot.
people seriously enjoy this? well to each their own i guess.....
The comments do nothing for me, but I do like looking at art fails.
Load More Replies... Why do liberals hate Christianity so much? Because Christian doctrine doesn't fit to their extreme agenda. Merry Christmas everyone and God Bless America!!!!!!!!!!! That should get Libs riled up lol.
Because too many christians no longer follow Christ's teachings. Christianity today is no more than pissing other people off, as your lame comment proves.
Load More Replies... I am officially so disgusted. Couldn't even finish this post till the end!
