Being street smart means knowing how to keep yourself safe from strangers. Whether you're just riding your bike in the neighborhood or coming home from a friend's at night, there are things you can do to protect your valuables and even your life.
To learn more about them, a now-deleted Reddit user posted a question on r/AskReddit, saying "What are the best 'street smart' tips you can give?" Within just 3 days, people have submitted hundreds of answers, providing valuable insights to those who might be exposed to dangerous environments.
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If you feel things are about to take a turn for the worse, leave.
If you get arrested, shut the f**k up. Ask for a lawyer, and then shut the f**k up. And when a lawyer shows up, shut the f**k up
Good advice. Initially frustrated with this post, but it isn't wrong. Maybe try not to get arrested to begin with.... but I can't argue with it, it is sound advice. Don't talk yourself into something.
Always walk on the side of the road that opposes traffic. This puts distance between you and a car that might be trying to follow you
Trust your gut. Your subconscious can notice details your conscious mind doesn’t. Don’t be afraid of making a scene to keep yourself safe
I remember driving at night and getting a weird vibe. I pulled into the middle lane to stop. Everyone in the car was confused, and honestly so was I. Seconds later a car flies by with it's lights off, going the wrong direction in the lane I just came from. Almost caused a wreck behind us (fortunately it didn't), but it was so weird. I only remember thinking the lights ahead of us were off a little and that triggered a big warning. Crazy.
I am female, these are tips to make you appear stronger as a female on the street (walking home, nighttime subway, etc):
If you think you are being followed or if you hear somebody behind you - feel free to turn around and look directly at them because it shows you are not afraid to be aware of your surroundings.
By the same measure, don't be afraid (generally) to meet people's eyes. Not in a confrontational "yeah? WHAT!?" sort of way, but in a "I am seeing the people in my world" sort of engaged and aware way.
This shows you do not fear engaging your surroundings.
Again - this is to show you are capable, this is not to provoke or antagonize - that's a different, defensive posture.
This will also make sure you get a good look at the person and might be able to describe them later if need be
Do not engage with crazy.
If they address you directly, still don’t engage
Basically, just be aware of your surroundings. A lack of situational awareness can lead to some bad things.
I don't know if this counts as street smart or just generally a good rule. Don't be wandering deep forests without situational awareness, don't pilot an airplane without situational awareness.
If someone is attempting to take you to a secondary location by car or something, fight like your life depends on it, because it does. Poke their eyes out. Punch them in the testicles. Bite them, scratch them, anything you can think of, do it to get yourself free. There are no rules when it comes to this situation. Some specific things you can do are screaming 'Fire!' Or 'Help my child!' This will catch more attention than just plain 'Help.'
This is true. Once they get you into car or van you are in much more difficult situation. Don't let them get you in, use whatever you got!
Use windows as mirrors to see your blind spots or to check behind you. Literally every window you walk past, you should take a quick glance to know what’s going on in your blind spots. You can almost completely get rid of blind spots altogether because of windows.
Don't walk into the street texting, tweeting, meme-ing, etc. I've seen people walking straight into traffic because of this
Cops will take the side of anyone that speaks calmly every time no matter the circumstances
My goodness every single suggestion on here has a snarky comment underneath it. It leads me to one conclusion: there are A LOT of miserable, self conscious, know it alls around. Show some kindness, compassion, and love. It doesn’t hurt you at all. If one doesn’t like or approve of these stories/suggestions then don’t read it. These things could potentially save a life one day. Not everyone thinks the same way so this could help someone. Or you folks can go back to being miserable nitpicks. It’s your choice 🤷🏻♀️
Seriously, you should swing wide around corners, it’s no joke. Five or six ago, I was walking home from the bar. I lived two blocks away. At the time, I was 6'1" and probably weighed 280 pounds. I came around the corner about halfway home and BOOM, I went down. Some kid that didn't even look 18 nailed me in the face with a skateboard. I went down so fast and didn't even know what hit me
If you are a woman in a public place a guy is giving you the creeps walk up to a big dude and just go “John! I can’t believe it’s you!” Then go into a hug and say “let me sit next to you, please.”
Most guys will get what’s going on and go with it and the chances that they themselves are creeps are slim.
No. Just go into a well lit crowded place, and alert an employee—-especially a female employee—-to the situation. Believe me, if you come up to me while I’m at work, and tell me someone’s following you, I will let you hide in the employee breakroom, have a trusted make employee walk you out, or let you slip out the back door to get away from them. If they follow you into the building, I will walk by them and make a scene like they touched my ass or something, because I love to embarrass creeps who are relying on their victims being embarrassed and quiet. I’m also 60 now, so it’ll make them look like pervs who grope old ladies (I will laugh my ass off about it afterward). I put up with this s**t for decades myself, and older women were usually my first defenders. Now that the harassment doesn’t happen to me anymore (what a relief), I want to pay that favor forward.
Shadows can also be useful to pay attention to when you’re trying to peek behind you or see if there’s someone around a corner
This is great! Too bad it doesn’t work on my place’s dead alleys, though.
Walk confident on the street. Thieves often target people who lack confidence, appear nervous or walk irregularly.
Imagine going through this list in your head, trying to recall all the details, and simultaneously thinking "don't appear nervous, don't appear nervous, don't appear nervous"
DO NOT WEAR HEADPHONES!!!
You make yourself an easy target by making it so even the most clod footed mugger can sneak up on you.
Always get your keys out before you leave a building to go to your car, and have them in hand as you exit it before you go into your house. Not only are they a great weapon if needed, but you aren't distracted while searching for them.
Grip your keys in your fist, with keys sticking out between your fingers. Like a spiked knuckleduster. I've done this a few times. Never needed it thankfully!
Be weary of women who approach you at a bar and immediately try and get you to go to another bar.
Those people are called “pullers” and they are paid to do it.
Pullers set up a situation where the man thinks he has a chance with a pretty woman. Then they get robbed by her cohorts.
If you drive an SUV and you're in a parking lot, beware if you get in and notice there's a flyer under the small wiper on your back window. Many people get in and look in the rear view mirror as they start to back out; that's when they see the flyer blocking their view. They pop out to grab it, leaving the engine on and the door open for the second it takes, and that's when someone jumps in and car jacks you.
Be mindful of vans with sliding side doors parked next to your vehicle also. Someone could open the door, pull you in the vehicle, while their accomplice starts the van and drive away with you.
When you're at a bus or train stop at night, with nobody else around, and you hear young guys talking where you know they go in your direction, quickly disappear before you get in their sight.
They may be harmless, but as long as the probability they want to start [things] as soon as they notice you is there, don't take a risk. Learned that the hard way several times.
Avoid gawking around. It screams 'tourist,' which screams 'money on them' and 'no idea what to do in a situation
Walk like you know where you're going, make eye contact with strangers, and don't wear fancy clothes/purses/backpacks when walking around the neighborhood or using public transport
And dont leave anything with your name in it sitting where people can see it. They call your name in a parking lot and you stop, thinking its someone you know. Then they spring
Putting a chain on your wallet shows a thief exactly where your wallet is and a chain will not stop an experienced thief.
In most cases, dressing and acting like you belong where you are goes a long way to blending in.
Whether it's breaking into an office building or walking by yourself at night, your appearance goes a long way towards making you just another blotch of white nois
Don’t fumble through your pockets.
If you think your being followed go into a store calmly and chat with the workers.
Carry a loose dollar bill or two if your someone that likes to give money to people. Less likely to target the dude that handed a single dollar than the guy who pulled a dollar out of a wallet full of 20’s
Pay attention to your surroundings at all time but mind your own business. Depending on the neighborhood someone screaming for help from an alley isn't really the one in danger
That’s called the “bystander effect” and has been studied extensively. It typically has detrimental consequences for the person calling for help. You hear someone calling for help, call the police. Simple.
The odds of someone being hurt and yelling for help are MUCH higher than the odds of you just happening to wind up near a criminal trying this ploy. In big cities, you're very rarely alone. Turn to the people nearest to you and ask if they hear the shouts. The Bystander Effect can be broken as soon as one person brings up a concern. Be that person.
Great. What if I'm in an alley and scream for help and everyone minds their own business??
If I'm driving home and I feel like someone is following me I always bypass my house and go somewhere else.
Schedule your activities so you are not out alone in an unpopulated area after dark.
heard a story like this someone heard a women crying in a alley, he went to the alley and there was a woman turned towards the wall crying, there were two large bins on either side of the alley and the guy just got a gut feeling and felt that there was something behind the bins, he immediately ran and the crying stopped just as quick
Wait, what? So the person screaming for help might be the attacker or rapist? If someone is screaming just yell you will call the cops.
Mind your own business period, a great way get killed is to get into the middle of someone else's domestic abuse situation or an argument that doesn't concern you. Heroes look good at funerals.
But still.... call the police. Don’t be the person that didn’t do anything just to find out later it was real and you MAY have been able to prevent a tragedy. Look at Kitty Genovese. If everyone wouldn’t have “minded their own business” or in 1 case literally pulled up a chair to watch 🙄 she may have lived... or at least had some justice served to the man who attacked her, twice. It takes very little effort to call the police while still walking and staying safe. If it ends up that a pos cop shows up (and that may happen) at least your conscience is clear. You did the right thing. (The universal you btw lol)
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Surround yourself with people who make you feel safe. There’s a difference between feeling comfortable and feeling safe. You could be comfortable with strangers— maybe you just met them and they’re nice. You might not be safe around those people, i.e. would those people help you if someone had a gun to your head, or run for their own safety? Find the people who you know would take a punch to keep you safe
This one is a little weird....I'm supposed to judge my friends and the people I surround myself with on whether or not they'd take a bullet for me? Excuse me, mother with two small children, if we are going to go this movie I need to know you'll throw yourself in front of a bullet for me first.
Realize the difference between someone trying to hurt you and trying rob you. Act accordingly.
Learn a martial art like origami and turn your assailant into a harmless paper flower.
I really enjoyed reading all the men's comments. They really helped. Thanks a lot guys.
I'd upvote you ten times if I was allowed.
@Hans and you continue on... thanks again for explaining to me my point of my comment, then somehow victimize yourself. Perhaps you do need to take a break.
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Why was Arminda Bomar downvoted?
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What the hell is this new trend of complaining whenever men express anything?? This is so toxic (and seeing the contributions here, unwarranted)
And here, ladies, we have another man telling a woman how they should feel. I expressed how I feel on one article, and somehow that is complaining whenever men express anything. Somehow you've made men out to be the victim here. Let me break it down for you, and any other man that decides to chime in. I do not care what you think. I have been attacked and assaulted by men - not women. And generations of women have been assaulted by men. We are sick of being treated like garbage. Sorry, not sorry, if that offends you. If you feel attacked then maybe you take a look at yourself and try to comprehend why you feel outraged that women are finally sticking up for themselves. Perhaps you are part of the problem.
Lori: this list has been proposed by BP as tips to EVERYONE. It is right in the title. If this list was to raise awareness for fears that women must face and how to mitigate them, it would be a completely different story. In fact, proposing such a list for everyone marginalizes the problems women face. And not agan, people, accuse me of negativity instead of accepting that you can also be critical about a good cause if they way it is presented has serious flaws...
Hans, I wouldn't have expected anything less than you mansplaining to me what this article said. Like I didn't just read it.
@Lori: Isn't "mansplaining" the easiest way out if one realizes that the other side has the better argument? You just refer to men and women as if these were opposed groups in a nature-given battle against each other. This is not my world view. And if you deny men to comment on a posting that addressed men and women, you may accept a comment on that. A comment written in a neutral tone, without any offence. You answer by belitteling me as a human, putting me into one category with those jerks who think they must lecture women. Just because I wrote something, not because of what I wrote. Frankly, I find this humilating and discouraging to the point where I wonder if I should stop posting anything on BP but for series on funny stuff. Obviously, this "Start the discussion" section is not meant for discussion but merely for fortifying one's view of the world.
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Oh bore off for pity's sake.
I don't believe this was mentioned, but if someone is trying to mug you and you can tell that they are not intending to harm or take you, it is best to just give them what they want and report it to the police rather than risk being hurt. I don't know if that's obvious or not, but just in case haha
This is why you have a couple small bills in your pocket - 20 is enough for a bit of drugs or booze and that's usually why you are mugged. Throw those bills away from you, so the mugger scrambles to pick them up (that's why you put it in small bills) - run the other way.
It's very dangerous to assume the mugger is going to do that. Give them what they want and get home unhurt.
Here is mine. Don't be shy and don't show kindness when strangers who want to talk about religion knock onto your door, stop you on the street, or invade your space when you're on your own (waiting, reading, relaxing etc.) These people will literally hijack your time and try to get into your private information. They're most likely part of a sect and sects often are a cover for mafia-like shady secret societies. So, when it happens, try to ignore them, insist you're busy, close the door to their face if needed, never leave your door unattended (they will welcome themselves in without your permission). Literally run away from them if you can.
"Would you like to hear about our lord and savior Jesu-" Wanna join in my goat sacrifice?
I’m a Christian and I’m gonna use that. “Yeah, wanna come in? I’m about to sacrifice a pig to Molech”
Lol !
Or have CCTV/video doorbell and see them coming and not bother answering the door. Anyone with a package is fine, anyone with empty hands or a clipboard is usually not worth the bother.
Home invaders carry packages so that you'll let them into your house. If someone's carrying something, tell them to leave it on the step.
Hi Aunt Messy, yes, thank you I do. I actually have a large parcel safe and the majority of deliveries go in there.. The rest are left on the doorstep if that big.
Yes, you do not owe any of them anything
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You sound like Qanon
The number one tip is missing. As a man to the other men: Stop harrashing, stalk, rape, assault and kill women. A majority of these tip would be unnecessary if everyone just behave like a human being.
Before I start I am dyslexia so their maybe errors. Kindly point them out and I shall fix them. Ok so if your making a fist put your thumb on the outside. Having it inside could break your thumb. And your elbow is very powerful weapons that hurt with out hurting you to bad. ( I did marital art btw )
My self-defnse instructor agrees with you. He taught us that elbows are awesome! (And mine did put a person down. Oops. I feel horrible, but... Oy.)
No wroeris. I’ve hraed mkniag the wrdos mxeid up hpels smoe ppleoe wtih dxisylea raed it mroe eilasy.
That 'Punished Edward' dude has clearly never felt threatened,vulnerable or unsafe in public whilst alone. All of these tips are useful different extents. This is reality to a lot of people.
@PunishedEdward u seriously need to get a brain.
Why were there so many negative comments on this post? It's great advice
People need to explain WHY something is what it is, otherwise people without these skills will most likely forget it or muck it up. Always explain why.
Take off high heels or stilettos and smack the sharp end on a car window. Breaking glass attracts attention and will set off alarms.
Here’s mine: educate boys from an early age to develop empathy and self-awareness
I'm so sorry so many people have to feel unsafe out on the streets! I never feel unsafe outside, and I live in a (for our standards) pretty large city, and not the best neighborhood...
I have some not in this list growing up in a shady (and sometimes violent) neighborhood. Wear fitting shoes and tie your laces, you can't move properly if your shoes are loose. Wear two shirts if possible, you never know when you need to wrap your arm with your shirt to parry metal pipes and machetes. Wear a belt, it's helps put range between you and your attackers. So don't wear pants that drop when you remove said belt. Keep some cash in your wallet, sometimes just giving a druggie everything in your pocket is enough, they need that fix like now.
I mean keep some cash in your pockets not wallet.
So much haters in this post. How come ? I went to read the comments to have extra advices and found a lot of people calling each other paranoid. What is wrong with people.?
It speaks to how safe they feel, and how safe they want to feel, is my guess. I never felt safe in my life. Is what it is. I don't ask others to live at my lvele of caution (overcaution, in cases). I just promote caution. That's sufficient "evil" to some. BTW, the best advice I ever got on this issue was from my gramps: Always know which way to run to get to safety so you run that way even in a panic.
Assholes like Hans like to pretend that no one is in danger, ever, and we should just walk down the dark street singing and dancing. He has never been assaulted, he has never been mugged, and he will never be at risk the way every woman is every day of her life.
Well, I enjoyed reading punished Edwards's comments. even though he hates bp, he still reads every article just to criticise :)
Also, if you ever are abducted, do anything you can to escape the vehicle, because once you are taken to a second drop off, your chances of survival decrease dramatically
This is all good advice, and we should practice it when we feel safe and secure, so ti becomes habit. To those who say it's fear-mongering/pseudo-advice? I heard thsi from my mother, my gramps, my dad, my self-defense instructor ------ and I know one young woman who died b/c she didn't get or heed such "pseudo-advice/fearmongering". Live with a little fear, you live a lot longer.
Live with less fear, and enjoy life! (You see these general phrases do not lead anywhere. We should rathher discuss how to forge the society we want to life in. But whenever I say something mildly critical here people freak out and put me on a side with those who say women are just fine. It is this black and white thinking that really does harm.)
It is impossible to live with less fear when you know that you could get hurt anytime that you are on the streets. When something bad has happened to you before, or people that you know. I feel like you really need to learn this.
Says the penis owner who has never had anything ever happen to them.
I'm sorry. Listening to my favorite podcast while I walked got me out of a depression, I can move again. I'm not going to stop wearing headphones.
ok, so maybe pay attention to your surroundings then? best of luck
I live in Finland where it's generally speaking really safe, but what I like to do is: put themes from horror movies playing in my earplugs and walk around. I get totally paranoid when walking past strangers in the city with the theme from halloween playing in my ears (pre-covid) . Good times!
I carry a stun gun (legal in my state) and will set it off from time to time just to let anyone who is curious know I have it.
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Either I stay inside too much, or I live in a not so crappy neighborhood afterall. You have to wonder where you all live that you have to be this aware every time you set a foot outside... Maybe it's time to move.
I made a remark about the grammar police....nicely informing us it is wary, and not weary. What is wrong with people? It is a serious subject. Streat atakks I meen. Not spelling or grammar. I give kudos to the people sharing tips for the sole reason of perhaps helping another soul. I don't think deviding the sexxes over this issue is helpfal to anyone. Men get attakked all the time as well as the womins. Yes I am doing this deliberately. Sew me
If you feel in jeopardy, call someone on your phone and just ask them to listen while you walk. Tell them aloud where you are. Describe who is following you.
If you need to be aware of your surroundings DO NOT WEAR HEADPHONES.
USE DECOYS! I worked for a woman who carried a handbag with lunch containers and "stuff." Her wallet and importan things were wrapped in gym laundry and in a mesh bag, so it looked like there was nothing worthwhile.
Always wear shoes that you can run in. Always wear a shirt that you can rip off or get out of quickly. Always go to the area in broad daylight before you go there at night. Never leave your drink alone (ever), best to drink out of a container you watch the person open or have opened yourself. Learn what the local police wear as their uniform and the local version of "9-1-1". Remember, women can attack/rob/abduct you even more easily than men can, you just don't expect them to.
Im not good at English but still try. Here my tips. Make sure there is at least 1 person know where you are, with who, which time you will come back. If you will be late, text or call them to inform that you late for 10/30 mins. Remember all the safe locations on the street, police station, fire station, store or company office ... Best ones is the ones with security guard. Holding the pointy part of your keys out between your finger as a weapon when walking on dark or dangerous place. When feel dangerous and can't run to safe place, then run to a group of people, try to act like you know them, and explain what happened, ask then to take you to where you feel safe, but not your home. When you wear sexy/party clothes, wear another layer outside or wear normal clothes and then change them later when you arrive. Do not wear highheel when walking in dark and dangerour place, but if you have to, remember that it is a weapon, use it. Dont put your address on pet collar, phone number or email is
(Cont.) enough. When post a picture online, choose the one that dont show the location and dont tag your location. Do not post a picture show the outside of your house. When in danger, dont just scream help, fight and scream something like this person hit me, i dont know him, please help. If they try to put on an act like you are their daughter/wife or something, scream louder, ask them what is your age, day of birth, major/subject to study... Let the people know they are stranger.
I think there's a reason street smart was in quotation marks.
2 days ago one of the tricks helped me keep $100 in my wallet
I've gotten into the habit of carrying my wallet in my front pocket and actually reducing the size because I felt it was cutting off circulation to my right leg whenever I sat on it on the train or work ... in any case, it also reduces the chance it will get pickpocketed ...
I highly suggest reading what brings kidnappers, reapers and so on to us. Headphones with loud music, hair in bun or ponytail etc. I usually try to not pin my hair when I go out, to be safe
This is for young people, women especially. If you’re alone in public, look like you’re going somewhere. Walk confidently and if someone approaches you (often a young man, some in their early twenties, some teenagers) and tells you how beautiful you are, say “I know” (or nothing at all) as you walk away faster. Traffickers will do this in hopes that you’ll stop, and if you say something like “no I’m not” they’ll begin pursuing you by continuously complimenting you and correcting you when you say they’re wrong. Traffickers prey on women who exhibit low self esteem, they’re like sharks and can spot it a mile away. Don’t ever stop and talk to someone who tries to stop you with a compliment. They may be trying to be nice, but they may not be. I suggest you err on the side of caution. Things like this happen in malls a lot because it’s frequented by young women; It’s a traffickers hunting ground.
Frankly, this is fearmongering. With the current discussion on women's safety, there is justifiction for some tips and hints and more awareness is warranted, but this list suggests that there is deadly danger lurking everywhere at any time for everyone. It isn't. Life isn't completely safe, but if irrational fear queches joy, much is lost.
It only takes one time. Most women do many of the things on this list while not even really thinking about it.
Caution isn't fear. It is rational to be careful. I have PTSD. I know irrational fear. This list? This isn't it.
it depends where you live, with respect, and women alone are not the only ones at risk. Most of the world lives in fear for good reasons, day or night. And crowds are dangerous. I am glad you do not know the things I have learned in life, but please don't discount that the reality you see is not the one most of the world lives. Thank you.
With respect, @Hans, I was not generalizing. I have situational awareness, and that includes awareness of situations which, in crowds and daylight, are still potentially dangerous. The risk is on a "scale" perhaps, but to accuse me of generalizing seems to be a deliberate overlooking of the *point*. You don't want to continue discussing the dangers that exist? Your right, your choice. Please don't decide those of us who want to continue the discussion are at fault, however, when it is *our* right and choice. Peace out.
In addition to this: the fears that most of us, including me, have, little correlate with actual dangers. You have fear of bodily harm? As long as you do not entirely stop drinking alcohol, eating red meat, and exercising multiple times a way, the risk of having self-inflicted bodily harm from the lifestyle is much higher than harm from another person. Or a current example: the risk of dying or getting severe side-consequences from COVID is much higher than that of getting serious vaccination side-consequences. Still many people are afraid of the vaccination.
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@Leo: I do not try to generalize. And I am well aware many parts of the world are bad. But there are examples of societies, of cities, where people do not lock their doors and do not constantly need "safety mode". Yes, also there crimes happen, but people do not let their lives be submerged by these. I think this is what we need to strive for. Changes the roots, not fight the syndromes. (And yes, I am aware that for those who have experienced violence this is little comfort.)
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The risk to be assaulted at daylight in crowded places is negligible. This list suggest that the same precaution that should (sadly) apply to a women alone in an empty, unlit allay in the night should apply to a group of men in daylight in the centry of the city. This is not the reality in many places of the world, fortunately.
Not really. It's about knowing what to do should the worst happen and avoiding the trouble, where possible, in the first place.
Well, with an hour to let the downvotes and comments here to sink it, I have come to a conclusion. This will be the last long comment you see from me for a while, and you will in the future find me where there is fun, animals and arts – the roots of BP, and not with these regurgitated social media filter bubbles. I find it truly depressing that everything needs to be black and white. Misogynists vs. feminists. Vegans vs. carnivores. Left vs. right. Society is about consensus. Society is about letting each other speak. Society is not to upvote those who say what you already know and to downvote those who say something that gets you out of your comfort zone. I have a ratio of comments I upvoted and downvoted on BP of maybe 500:1, yet people tell me I am so negative. How many downvotes do they spend? I wish all of you a happy day with many joyful moments, and fewer trouble with whatever you find troublesome, I truly do.
I do feel there is something fundamentally wrong with downvoting people who just have a different take, a different opinion. I agree that the article looks like fearmongering but if you pull together a lot of safety information into one place it's going to. Lists like these can help though. Some things may not have been considered by all readers before - we're a wide ranging bunch here on BP. A lot of these are just things we do and not really think that deeply about. Others are more specific to a set of circumstances. We do need the differing opinions, sometimes I have read a comment, thought about it and changed my mind. I think you often speak a lot of sense and wish you well.
I don't come here for votes. Nor do I check my up-downvote ratio. (I didn't know we could, in fact.) I'm trying to share opinions, same as others, and there is, in fact, a range of "gray" often displayed on BP, and it's only some people who decide it's one or the other. Most of us do want to find a consensus, but it's difficult when we're told a concern we find legitimate is just "fearmongering", for example. That is one heck of a judgment. What if there is no consensus in your favor? Does that delegitimize the issue? If you say yes, consider why. If you say no, consider if you act as you speak. I have my black-white issues (violence); I'm sure you have yours. It doesn't preclude consensus *eventually*. But do as you wish, and fair winds at your back.
Hans, I do like you. I think you’re a fine enough person, and I don’t understand where the vitriol is coming from.
It really does depend on where you live bud. If I went out walking after night in my town I'd be fine, but if I drive to the nearest city and take a walk at night I've got about a 50% of being robbed or raped. Heck a girl I went to uni with got raped twice and robbed 4 times in one year. Sometimes it isn't fearmongering...sometimes the world is just a dark and scary place. Edited to add: two of the robberies uni girl was involved in happened in broad daylight on her way to class. It's more likely to happen at night, but it happens during the day.
I do a majority of these when I travel alone for work. It may seem overly cautious but I’m not willing to take the risk especially when I’m in a new city. Most people are either nice or just want to be left alone. It’s the one bad one though that can ruin everything.
Exactly. I was raised a bit too danger-aware, and I know it, but I've seen the results when people assume safety is theirs. It's a hard balance.
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Dummy wallet. If you get robbed give them a dummy wallet with a little cash in it, maybe a AAA card or some business cards, or an *expired* debit card. Keep your real wallet in your other pocket.
Very, very risky indeed. If they realise what you've done, you've escalated the situation.
This is some of the dumbest s**t I have read in ages.
And here I am, wondering why the younger generations are so panicky and afraid all the time. Articles like this feed the fear.
Now isn't this just the list of a lifetime to fuel someone's paranoia and nervousness
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All you people need to stop watching TV
And reading books or newspapers or watching plays or looking at art or listening to the radio or music
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Females - walking around fearful will give off vibes that attract predators.
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Move to a country where you don't need to do all of this. When I think that when I was young I wanted to move to USA, now I am so happy I didn't and can walk everyday where I live knowing I will never be in danger ( Singapore )
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This is the most cringe list... "stay away from crazy people" "be careful at night" "don't let your guard down" like seriously... these are all extremely obvious and most are redundant. Lazy article copied from a deleted reddit
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If you live in a state that allows concealed carry purchase a small handgun and make sure to recieve proper gun training and use it with lots of discretion but can help in extreme situations.
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This list boils down to "don't leave your house, bolt the doors and windows and BE AFRAID ALL THE TIME". Did I miss anything?
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Rule number 9. Always carry a knife.
Don't carry any kind of weapon if you aren't trained to use it. Otherwise you just handed the person attacking you a weapon he/she can use against you
Sadly it is illegal in many places. Carry at least a deodorant spray. Its not pepperspray but it will sting a bit and might give you a chance.
EveAid Defence Spray is legal to own and carry in the UK. Tasers, knives, mace etc are not.
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I also believe tasers are legal (and even if not, I would rather risk carrying one and potentially saving a life than being empty handed if faced with a dangerous situation.).
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When it's absolutely necessary to leave your bunker make sure you carry a lighted flame thrower with you at all times.
I really enjoyed reading all the men's comments. They really helped. Thanks a lot guys.
I'd upvote you ten times if I was allowed.
@Hans and you continue on... thanks again for explaining to me my point of my comment, then somehow victimize yourself. Perhaps you do need to take a break.
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Why was Arminda Bomar downvoted?
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What the hell is this new trend of complaining whenever men express anything?? This is so toxic (and seeing the contributions here, unwarranted)
And here, ladies, we have another man telling a woman how they should feel. I expressed how I feel on one article, and somehow that is complaining whenever men express anything. Somehow you've made men out to be the victim here. Let me break it down for you, and any other man that decides to chime in. I do not care what you think. I have been attacked and assaulted by men - not women. And generations of women have been assaulted by men. We are sick of being treated like garbage. Sorry, not sorry, if that offends you. If you feel attacked then maybe you take a look at yourself and try to comprehend why you feel outraged that women are finally sticking up for themselves. Perhaps you are part of the problem.
Lori: this list has been proposed by BP as tips to EVERYONE. It is right in the title. If this list was to raise awareness for fears that women must face and how to mitigate them, it would be a completely different story. In fact, proposing such a list for everyone marginalizes the problems women face. And not agan, people, accuse me of negativity instead of accepting that you can also be critical about a good cause if they way it is presented has serious flaws...
Hans, I wouldn't have expected anything less than you mansplaining to me what this article said. Like I didn't just read it.
@Lori: Isn't "mansplaining" the easiest way out if one realizes that the other side has the better argument? You just refer to men and women as if these were opposed groups in a nature-given battle against each other. This is not my world view. And if you deny men to comment on a posting that addressed men and women, you may accept a comment on that. A comment written in a neutral tone, without any offence. You answer by belitteling me as a human, putting me into one category with those jerks who think they must lecture women. Just because I wrote something, not because of what I wrote. Frankly, I find this humilating and discouraging to the point where I wonder if I should stop posting anything on BP but for series on funny stuff. Obviously, this "Start the discussion" section is not meant for discussion but merely for fortifying one's view of the world.
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Google pays for every Person every hour online working from home job. I have received $23K in this month easily and I earns every weeks $5K to 8$K on the internet. Every Person join this working easily by just just open this website and follow instructions..... Visit here…... Www.NetPay1.Com
Oh bore off for pity's sake.
I don't believe this was mentioned, but if someone is trying to mug you and you can tell that they are not intending to harm or take you, it is best to just give them what they want and report it to the police rather than risk being hurt. I don't know if that's obvious or not, but just in case haha
This is why you have a couple small bills in your pocket - 20 is enough for a bit of drugs or booze and that's usually why you are mugged. Throw those bills away from you, so the mugger scrambles to pick them up (that's why you put it in small bills) - run the other way.
It's very dangerous to assume the mugger is going to do that. Give them what they want and get home unhurt.
Here is mine. Don't be shy and don't show kindness when strangers who want to talk about religion knock onto your door, stop you on the street, or invade your space when you're on your own (waiting, reading, relaxing etc.) These people will literally hijack your time and try to get into your private information. They're most likely part of a sect and sects often are a cover for mafia-like shady secret societies. So, when it happens, try to ignore them, insist you're busy, close the door to their face if needed, never leave your door unattended (they will welcome themselves in without your permission). Literally run away from them if you can.
"Would you like to hear about our lord and savior Jesu-" Wanna join in my goat sacrifice?
I’m a Christian and I’m gonna use that. “Yeah, wanna come in? I’m about to sacrifice a pig to Molech”
Lol !
Or have CCTV/video doorbell and see them coming and not bother answering the door. Anyone with a package is fine, anyone with empty hands or a clipboard is usually not worth the bother.
Home invaders carry packages so that you'll let them into your house. If someone's carrying something, tell them to leave it on the step.
Hi Aunt Messy, yes, thank you I do. I actually have a large parcel safe and the majority of deliveries go in there.. The rest are left on the doorstep if that big.
Yes, you do not owe any of them anything
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You sound like Qanon
The number one tip is missing. As a man to the other men: Stop harrashing, stalk, rape, assault and kill women. A majority of these tip would be unnecessary if everyone just behave like a human being.
Before I start I am dyslexia so their maybe errors. Kindly point them out and I shall fix them. Ok so if your making a fist put your thumb on the outside. Having it inside could break your thumb. And your elbow is very powerful weapons that hurt with out hurting you to bad. ( I did marital art btw )
My self-defnse instructor agrees with you. He taught us that elbows are awesome! (And mine did put a person down. Oops. I feel horrible, but... Oy.)
No wroeris. I’ve hraed mkniag the wrdos mxeid up hpels smoe ppleoe wtih dxisylea raed it mroe eilasy.
That 'Punished Edward' dude has clearly never felt threatened,vulnerable or unsafe in public whilst alone. All of these tips are useful different extents. This is reality to a lot of people.
@PunishedEdward u seriously need to get a brain.
Why were there so many negative comments on this post? It's great advice
People need to explain WHY something is what it is, otherwise people without these skills will most likely forget it or muck it up. Always explain why.
Take off high heels or stilettos and smack the sharp end on a car window. Breaking glass attracts attention and will set off alarms.
Here’s mine: educate boys from an early age to develop empathy and self-awareness
I'm so sorry so many people have to feel unsafe out on the streets! I never feel unsafe outside, and I live in a (for our standards) pretty large city, and not the best neighborhood...
I have some not in this list growing up in a shady (and sometimes violent) neighborhood. Wear fitting shoes and tie your laces, you can't move properly if your shoes are loose. Wear two shirts if possible, you never know when you need to wrap your arm with your shirt to parry metal pipes and machetes. Wear a belt, it's helps put range between you and your attackers. So don't wear pants that drop when you remove said belt. Keep some cash in your wallet, sometimes just giving a druggie everything in your pocket is enough, they need that fix like now.
I mean keep some cash in your pockets not wallet.
So much haters in this post. How come ? I went to read the comments to have extra advices and found a lot of people calling each other paranoid. What is wrong with people.?
It speaks to how safe they feel, and how safe they want to feel, is my guess. I never felt safe in my life. Is what it is. I don't ask others to live at my lvele of caution (overcaution, in cases). I just promote caution. That's sufficient "evil" to some. BTW, the best advice I ever got on this issue was from my gramps: Always know which way to run to get to safety so you run that way even in a panic.
Assholes like Hans like to pretend that no one is in danger, ever, and we should just walk down the dark street singing and dancing. He has never been assaulted, he has never been mugged, and he will never be at risk the way every woman is every day of her life.
Well, I enjoyed reading punished Edwards's comments. even though he hates bp, he still reads every article just to criticise :)
Also, if you ever are abducted, do anything you can to escape the vehicle, because once you are taken to a second drop off, your chances of survival decrease dramatically
This is all good advice, and we should practice it when we feel safe and secure, so ti becomes habit. To those who say it's fear-mongering/pseudo-advice? I heard thsi from my mother, my gramps, my dad, my self-defense instructor ------ and I know one young woman who died b/c she didn't get or heed such "pseudo-advice/fearmongering". Live with a little fear, you live a lot longer.
Live with less fear, and enjoy life! (You see these general phrases do not lead anywhere. We should rathher discuss how to forge the society we want to life in. But whenever I say something mildly critical here people freak out and put me on a side with those who say women are just fine. It is this black and white thinking that really does harm.)
It is impossible to live with less fear when you know that you could get hurt anytime that you are on the streets. When something bad has happened to you before, or people that you know. I feel like you really need to learn this.
Says the penis owner who has never had anything ever happen to them.
I'm sorry. Listening to my favorite podcast while I walked got me out of a depression, I can move again. I'm not going to stop wearing headphones.
ok, so maybe pay attention to your surroundings then? best of luck
I live in Finland where it's generally speaking really safe, but what I like to do is: put themes from horror movies playing in my earplugs and walk around. I get totally paranoid when walking past strangers in the city with the theme from halloween playing in my ears (pre-covid) . Good times!
I carry a stun gun (legal in my state) and will set it off from time to time just to let anyone who is curious know I have it.
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Either I stay inside too much, or I live in a not so crappy neighborhood afterall. You have to wonder where you all live that you have to be this aware every time you set a foot outside... Maybe it's time to move.
I made a remark about the grammar police....nicely informing us it is wary, and not weary. What is wrong with people? It is a serious subject. Streat atakks I meen. Not spelling or grammar. I give kudos to the people sharing tips for the sole reason of perhaps helping another soul. I don't think deviding the sexxes over this issue is helpfal to anyone. Men get attakked all the time as well as the womins. Yes I am doing this deliberately. Sew me
If you feel in jeopardy, call someone on your phone and just ask them to listen while you walk. Tell them aloud where you are. Describe who is following you.
If you need to be aware of your surroundings DO NOT WEAR HEADPHONES.
USE DECOYS! I worked for a woman who carried a handbag with lunch containers and "stuff." Her wallet and importan things were wrapped in gym laundry and in a mesh bag, so it looked like there was nothing worthwhile.
Always wear shoes that you can run in. Always wear a shirt that you can rip off or get out of quickly. Always go to the area in broad daylight before you go there at night. Never leave your drink alone (ever), best to drink out of a container you watch the person open or have opened yourself. Learn what the local police wear as their uniform and the local version of "9-1-1". Remember, women can attack/rob/abduct you even more easily than men can, you just don't expect them to.
Im not good at English but still try. Here my tips. Make sure there is at least 1 person know where you are, with who, which time you will come back. If you will be late, text or call them to inform that you late for 10/30 mins. Remember all the safe locations on the street, police station, fire station, store or company office ... Best ones is the ones with security guard. Holding the pointy part of your keys out between your finger as a weapon when walking on dark or dangerous place. When feel dangerous and can't run to safe place, then run to a group of people, try to act like you know them, and explain what happened, ask then to take you to where you feel safe, but not your home. When you wear sexy/party clothes, wear another layer outside or wear normal clothes and then change them later when you arrive. Do not wear highheel when walking in dark and dangerour place, but if you have to, remember that it is a weapon, use it. Dont put your address on pet collar, phone number or email is
(Cont.) enough. When post a picture online, choose the one that dont show the location and dont tag your location. Do not post a picture show the outside of your house. When in danger, dont just scream help, fight and scream something like this person hit me, i dont know him, please help. If they try to put on an act like you are their daughter/wife or something, scream louder, ask them what is your age, day of birth, major/subject to study... Let the people know they are stranger.
I think there's a reason street smart was in quotation marks.
2 days ago one of the tricks helped me keep $100 in my wallet
I've gotten into the habit of carrying my wallet in my front pocket and actually reducing the size because I felt it was cutting off circulation to my right leg whenever I sat on it on the train or work ... in any case, it also reduces the chance it will get pickpocketed ...
I highly suggest reading what brings kidnappers, reapers and so on to us. Headphones with loud music, hair in bun or ponytail etc. I usually try to not pin my hair when I go out, to be safe
This is for young people, women especially. If you’re alone in public, look like you’re going somewhere. Walk confidently and if someone approaches you (often a young man, some in their early twenties, some teenagers) and tells you how beautiful you are, say “I know” (or nothing at all) as you walk away faster. Traffickers will do this in hopes that you’ll stop, and if you say something like “no I’m not” they’ll begin pursuing you by continuously complimenting you and correcting you when you say they’re wrong. Traffickers prey on women who exhibit low self esteem, they’re like sharks and can spot it a mile away. Don’t ever stop and talk to someone who tries to stop you with a compliment. They may be trying to be nice, but they may not be. I suggest you err on the side of caution. Things like this happen in malls a lot because it’s frequented by young women; It’s a traffickers hunting ground.
Frankly, this is fearmongering. With the current discussion on women's safety, there is justifiction for some tips and hints and more awareness is warranted, but this list suggests that there is deadly danger lurking everywhere at any time for everyone. It isn't. Life isn't completely safe, but if irrational fear queches joy, much is lost.
It only takes one time. Most women do many of the things on this list while not even really thinking about it.
Caution isn't fear. It is rational to be careful. I have PTSD. I know irrational fear. This list? This isn't it.
it depends where you live, with respect, and women alone are not the only ones at risk. Most of the world lives in fear for good reasons, day or night. And crowds are dangerous. I am glad you do not know the things I have learned in life, but please don't discount that the reality you see is not the one most of the world lives. Thank you.
With respect, @Hans, I was not generalizing. I have situational awareness, and that includes awareness of situations which, in crowds and daylight, are still potentially dangerous. The risk is on a "scale" perhaps, but to accuse me of generalizing seems to be a deliberate overlooking of the *point*. You don't want to continue discussing the dangers that exist? Your right, your choice. Please don't decide those of us who want to continue the discussion are at fault, however, when it is *our* right and choice. Peace out.
In addition to this: the fears that most of us, including me, have, little correlate with actual dangers. You have fear of bodily harm? As long as you do not entirely stop drinking alcohol, eating red meat, and exercising multiple times a way, the risk of having self-inflicted bodily harm from the lifestyle is much higher than harm from another person. Or a current example: the risk of dying or getting severe side-consequences from COVID is much higher than that of getting serious vaccination side-consequences. Still many people are afraid of the vaccination.
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@Leo: I do not try to generalize. And I am well aware many parts of the world are bad. But there are examples of societies, of cities, where people do not lock their doors and do not constantly need "safety mode". Yes, also there crimes happen, but people do not let their lives be submerged by these. I think this is what we need to strive for. Changes the roots, not fight the syndromes. (And yes, I am aware that for those who have experienced violence this is little comfort.)
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The risk to be assaulted at daylight in crowded places is negligible. This list suggest that the same precaution that should (sadly) apply to a women alone in an empty, unlit allay in the night should apply to a group of men in daylight in the centry of the city. This is not the reality in many places of the world, fortunately.
Not really. It's about knowing what to do should the worst happen and avoiding the trouble, where possible, in the first place.
Well, with an hour to let the downvotes and comments here to sink it, I have come to a conclusion. This will be the last long comment you see from me for a while, and you will in the future find me where there is fun, animals and arts – the roots of BP, and not with these regurgitated social media filter bubbles. I find it truly depressing that everything needs to be black and white. Misogynists vs. feminists. Vegans vs. carnivores. Left vs. right. Society is about consensus. Society is about letting each other speak. Society is not to upvote those who say what you already know and to downvote those who say something that gets you out of your comfort zone. I have a ratio of comments I upvoted and downvoted on BP of maybe 500:1, yet people tell me I am so negative. How many downvotes do they spend? I wish all of you a happy day with many joyful moments, and fewer trouble with whatever you find troublesome, I truly do.
I do feel there is something fundamentally wrong with downvoting people who just have a different take, a different opinion. I agree that the article looks like fearmongering but if you pull together a lot of safety information into one place it's going to. Lists like these can help though. Some things may not have been considered by all readers before - we're a wide ranging bunch here on BP. A lot of these are just things we do and not really think that deeply about. Others are more specific to a set of circumstances. We do need the differing opinions, sometimes I have read a comment, thought about it and changed my mind. I think you often speak a lot of sense and wish you well.
I don't come here for votes. Nor do I check my up-downvote ratio. (I didn't know we could, in fact.) I'm trying to share opinions, same as others, and there is, in fact, a range of "gray" often displayed on BP, and it's only some people who decide it's one or the other. Most of us do want to find a consensus, but it's difficult when we're told a concern we find legitimate is just "fearmongering", for example. That is one heck of a judgment. What if there is no consensus in your favor? Does that delegitimize the issue? If you say yes, consider why. If you say no, consider if you act as you speak. I have my black-white issues (violence); I'm sure you have yours. It doesn't preclude consensus *eventually*. But do as you wish, and fair winds at your back.
Hans, I do like you. I think you’re a fine enough person, and I don’t understand where the vitriol is coming from.
It really does depend on where you live bud. If I went out walking after night in my town I'd be fine, but if I drive to the nearest city and take a walk at night I've got about a 50% of being robbed or raped. Heck a girl I went to uni with got raped twice and robbed 4 times in one year. Sometimes it isn't fearmongering...sometimes the world is just a dark and scary place. Edited to add: two of the robberies uni girl was involved in happened in broad daylight on her way to class. It's more likely to happen at night, but it happens during the day.
I do a majority of these when I travel alone for work. It may seem overly cautious but I’m not willing to take the risk especially when I’m in a new city. Most people are either nice or just want to be left alone. It’s the one bad one though that can ruin everything.
Exactly. I was raised a bit too danger-aware, and I know it, but I've seen the results when people assume safety is theirs. It's a hard balance.
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Dummy wallet. If you get robbed give them a dummy wallet with a little cash in it, maybe a AAA card or some business cards, or an *expired* debit card. Keep your real wallet in your other pocket.
Very, very risky indeed. If they realise what you've done, you've escalated the situation.
This is some of the dumbest s**t I have read in ages.
And here I am, wondering why the younger generations are so panicky and afraid all the time. Articles like this feed the fear.
Now isn't this just the list of a lifetime to fuel someone's paranoia and nervousness
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All you people need to stop watching TV
And reading books or newspapers or watching plays or looking at art or listening to the radio or music
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Females - walking around fearful will give off vibes that attract predators.
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Move to a country where you don't need to do all of this. When I think that when I was young I wanted to move to USA, now I am so happy I didn't and can walk everyday where I live knowing I will never be in danger ( Singapore )
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This is the most cringe list... "stay away from crazy people" "be careful at night" "don't let your guard down" like seriously... these are all extremely obvious and most are redundant. Lazy article copied from a deleted reddit
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If you live in a state that allows concealed carry purchase a small handgun and make sure to recieve proper gun training and use it with lots of discretion but can help in extreme situations.
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This list boils down to "don't leave your house, bolt the doors and windows and BE AFRAID ALL THE TIME". Did I miss anything?
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Rule number 9. Always carry a knife.
Don't carry any kind of weapon if you aren't trained to use it. Otherwise you just handed the person attacking you a weapon he/she can use against you
Sadly it is illegal in many places. Carry at least a deodorant spray. Its not pepperspray but it will sting a bit and might give you a chance.
EveAid Defence Spray is legal to own and carry in the UK. Tasers, knives, mace etc are not.
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I also believe tasers are legal (and even if not, I would rather risk carrying one and potentially saving a life than being empty handed if faced with a dangerous situation.).
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When it's absolutely necessary to leave your bunker make sure you carry a lighted flame thrower with you at all times.