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30 Signs Indicating That A Relationship Has Reached A Dead End, As Pointed Out By Folks In This Online Group
It’s a darn shame when a relationship doesn’t last a lifetime. And while much of it is dependent on how the people in a relationship play their cards, an end is sometimes an inevitability because there isn’t any chemistry, or someone gave up halfway, or maybe the two don’t agree on which side the toilet paper roll should be hung on the holder.
Whatever the case, it sometimes happens, and the AskReddit community have been listing key signs that a relationship has run its course, reaching nearly 4,000 comments and the post garnering over 20,000 upvotes.
Check out the best of the best answers shared in the viral post below. And why not upvote and comment on them, sharing some of your signs of the end of a relationship in the comment section below!
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Several, but off the top of my head... The sight of them does nothing for you. Getting a text or phone call from them elicits an eyeroll. You try to avoid them. You cannot hold a conversation with them because everything they say is irritating. You really could not care less about their day or anything they have to say to you. You find yourself fantasizing of a life without them... and it makes you smile. You know, just to name a few.
If you find that you can only relax and be yourself when they aren’t around, crushing you with the weight of their silent judgement and disapproval, it’s way past the expiration date.
Learning to disregard every unnecessary thing that won't help for your self growth is a mature thing to do
From personal experience, the biggest indicator is when tensions should be high, you should be upset or arguing, but you just don't care anymore.
You've bottled your real feelings up so much that now everything they do or say fills you with contempt lol. Oops
When you turn the corner driving home, and feel disappointment when you see her car in the driveway - because you know the minute you step in the door she's going to start crapping on you again.
When the thought of being near/around them gives you anxiety. Not the normal "I hope I don't look like a fool around them" anxiety, but that deep, instinctual fight or flight sense of dread
That's the way I felt pressing the elevator button to go upstairs to my job. Quit soon after and was so much lighter. But don't you know, they replaced me with two girls and a month later they were phoning asking if I wanted to some part-time work since they couldn't keep up with all the tasks that I had managed alone for six years.
When you can’t make yourself trust them again no matter how hard you try.
You used to think their little quirks and habits were adorable, Now they are just annoying AF.
This doesn't necessarily mean the relationship is over. I simply did not notice that my husband ate like a slob, for the first 2-3 years of us living together. Oh I was so in love. Now after almost 12 years I feel like I want to tape his mouth shut sometimes but I never say anything although his smacking and eating like a cow annoys me so much.:)))) I love him
You no longer like the way your SO smells.
You have something big happen and they are not the first person you call.
I had a car accident at like 5am and didn’t even bother calling my now ex, he was useless and I called the people that mattered.
When you realize you don't wish the best for her/him...you don't wish her/him any harm either...just disinterested in building something better together.
Damn, you can have love or hate and there is passion in both, but indifference is a killer.
You're both cheating on each other with the same person.
That could also just be an arrangement that works for all three parties once they’ve worked out the parameters of the deal
When texting them becomes a chore instead of something that makes you happy
Not necessarily. Sometimes texting anyone you love can be a chore. The problem sparks when there is a total lack of emotion when texting back, feeling nothing at all.
When you go to AskReddit to see if sexting is considered cheating.
If you're doing something that would deeply hurt your partner if they were next to you while you're doing it, then that's cheating. It's not really the act in itself, it's the broken trust.
When you catch yourself lying often. When you're hiding who you are around them because you don't want to fight or disappoint them.
Oh, and when you won't f**k each other anymore.
This happened to my best friend. Telling the truth to her bf was terryfing, so she constantly lied. What I mean with truth were things that are normal for many people but for her boyfriend were unacceptable. And of course, she got caught (bf checked her phone regularly) and boy, fights were spectacular. Hard for me to see her passing through all of that and finally happy when she got her sh1t together and dumped him.
When you notice that your partner doesn't miss you (or vice versa) after being separated for a while. If you've been apart for a couple weeks or longer and your partner still feels no particular urgency to see you or talk to you, then the relationship is dead.
I work 8 hours a day, 4 x a week. I miss him. And he misses me making his cuppa tea. And also taking the piss outta me. It's definitely love. Especially when he pops out and scares me shitless after a long day at work. Has our son doubled over with laughter. So much happiness from what was supposed to be a mutual casual shag.
When everything about your life is being controlled down to the tiny details.
When you discover irreconcilable differences. Relationships take a lot of work- there will be times when you don't want to be together, or when you're not sexually in sync, or whatever. Those things need to be worked through and your relationship will be stronger for it. The red flag I would watch out for is inherent differences in morality, beliefs, that kind of thing.
Yes, opposites do not attract in the long run. You must have the same values.
When you come home after work and no one is home and 90% of everything in the house is gone. (Happened twice)
Twice? If it happened twice u might need to do some serious self reflection on your part
Happened to my exes brother. He came home, opened the door (it was dark) and he shouted: Hello, I'm home! Thought it did sound funny, turned on the lights and most of the furniture was gone, just like his wife and children.
It's either you forgot that you move into a new house or you came to the wrong address. LOL
When you're physically in the same room, but it feels as though the other person isn't there - that their thoughts and emotions are somewhere else.
I begged my boss to send me on business trips.
When you get a phone call, saying your SO is going to be gone unexpectedly for two weeks and you respond " ok I'll miss you,luv you,bye" and then do the happy dance, and you are pretty sure they are too? Just make that two weeks permanent. Talking from experience. It got so strained onto that before we divorced, my ex was gone three of four weekends in the month. He was so unpleasant to be around when he was there, I was glad he was cheating! Not even joking. The three kids and I would drop him off at the little airport (we owned a crappy little 1960 Cessna) and as soon as he took off, McDonald's and movie time!
When you no longer care if they ate something all day or not.
I think it’s not the specific context of “eating” but the gesture that comes with it, asking is caring and thoughtful, because they love you
Contempt. I took a marriage and family course in college and there professor said that’s one of the biggest signs things are going to/should end. And I’ve 100% been there
There’s a voice in your head that says “You know it’s over” .... every time my relationship has been ending I have had this happen. Sometimes you fight it, sometimes you don’t . But the voice is always right in the end .
"(S)He is just a friend, you don't have to worry about them" -> spends more time with friend than partner.
(might sound lame because of the memes, but my almost 6 years SO cheated on me and now is dating the 'friend')
When all you can think about is how different you are.
When you're lying or making excuses to not be with them.
When they go on a Spring Break trip and screw a guy she went to high school with repeatedly for a week.
When someone says your SO's name and you give a sigh or a grimaced look on your face.
When spending time is something you have to give effort to actively think about and plan out as opposed to something you look forward to and excitedly long for. I know that's what it was for me: she became a block in my schedule instead of the reason my schedule existed.
When either of you whip out your phone constantly when together. Can't hold a moment of comfortable silence to appreciate you both being in each other's presence.
You find your partner's Tinder profile and give them advice on to make it better.
Could also mean that you have a healthy open relationship. I know couples who did care so much for each other that they actually did this.
Mine personally (and I caught myself doing this twice with the same person both times we went out) was doing this thing that someone (I cant remember who) explained.
It's where you say something along the lines of "yeah we have our issues but....." in a whiney voice that really isnt all that convincing at all.
When you realize that your partner will never be willing to put in the work to make the relationship succeed. And if when planning the future, it's not pheasable to maintain your relationship while also continuing towards your dreams and end goals.
Everytime: "Babe, we need to work on our connection, relationship and future together". Him: "Mmhmmm" *batters buttons on Xbox controller and goes back to ignoring me*
when you have your own secret snack drawer in addition to the snack drawer you guys 'share'
Going on 34 years married and I have to have a secret drawer cause he just can't eat a few M&Ms, he'll have to eat them all. I bought one of those huge Costco bags and he and my sister ate the whole bag in under 3 days. Its like he's afraid that he won't get anymore....while I like to eat a small amount as a treat and savor them for quite a few days. So the best treats get put in the secret drawer, other healthier treats are in the shared drawer, so its not like he doesn't have goodies, he just doesn't have any self-control
I don't want to come across as smug, but reading this post reminds me how amazing my own relationship is. Things are shitty in several aspects of my life, but my bond with my wife isn't one of them. She's my rock, and I'm hers. However, I've definitely experienced some of these points in previous relationships.
These aren't red flags - these are the giant red banners you're wrapped in after having ignored the red flags for years.
When they knowingly restrain your limbs when you have a phobia and don't let go as you scream 'get off!!' over and over again. Then they try to change the narrative, saying they were just trying to cuddle you, and suddenly you started punching them?? Then they come home, pour juice over your head and smear food in your hair and face while screaming at you for not apologising to them when you have already apologised over and over. Last night was interesting.
hmm that's assault. lay a charge, get a restraining order, and move out.
Load More Replies...Always reassuring to read an article like this and be completely befuddled at the thought of any of it happening between my wife and I.
When you ask yourself 'What have they done to make my life better?' or 'What am I getting out of this?' And you can't think of anything, it's time to go.
How about taunting you and having five hour arguments over who you sat next to at an event, telling you they don't want you talking to direct family/friends, searching your phone without permission, purposefully saying homophobic and racist things to get a rise out of your family and friends and think it's funny, all while you are 5 months pregnant. Is that reason enough? (She left him last night and he is trying to garner sympathy from me since I'm her strong sister, good luck buddy).
My ex-husband was a bit of anarcissist. It's gotten a little better in the last few years though ... according to our sons. Back then (almost 30 years ago) it almost drove me insane how selfish he was often and how important it was to him, to always “look good” in front of others. I also have a few quirks and certainly made a lot of mistakes when we were together, but the worst part for me was his behavior after the breakup. He has been inconsiderate towards the children and me and often acted without thinking about the effect on us. His main priority was clearly his "new life" ... we just weren't important enough anymore.
I got several: Being withdrawn; wanting to spend some time apart; refusing to tell/refusing communication whenever there was something wrong. My ex did all that, when I obliviously thought things were fine. They were terrible at communication, and that was common throughout the relationship, regardless of how thick and thin things were. And they would tell me that things were fine whenever I asked if there was anything wrong. They ended up leaving me for someone else.
1: When they want to start a cult, and not in like the funny way, like a cult dedicated to mac and cheese or whatever. No, an actual cult, with a rule book and everything, because they want to create a new world where everyone loves them and no one ever tells them they're wrong. 2: They "joke" about cutting off your legs and eating them. 3: They say they're gonna kill your grandma. 4: They tell you they hate your friends and then get pissed off when said friends block them. 5: They tell you that your favorite band sucks and then a couple of weeks later they pretend to be a fan. 6: They get mad at you for talking to your friend because they think you're "flirting" but then they go off and hit on other people in front of you. 7: When you can't make a joke without them interrogating you. 8: When you finally get clean, pull your head out of your ass, and break up with them, they spam you on several different accounts begging you to take them back.
9: They lie about you to a s**t ton of people. 10: They still won't leave you alone because they have your username on a website where you can't block people.
Load More Replies...I was in a bad relationship for 5 years with a guy who was emotionally abusive. I didn't realise it at the time, it was my first serious relationship. Despite all of the HUGE red flags and awful treatment I stayed with him even after trying to leave (I think this is typical for an abusive relationship). Anyway the point when the lightbulb went off in my head wasn't any of the awful things he did or said to me. It was when I was returning from overseas and expected my dad to be greeting me at the airport. I was in quite a happy mood as I hadn't seen anyone for a few months. Instead I emerged and saw my then-partner (he'd asked my dad to not go, so he could surprise me instead). I instantly felt a severe sense of dread and wanted to turn around, run back through the airport and get back on any flight going anywhere. I knew that meant I really had to leave him. Took a long time but eventually I did.
Age 15 in 1996. Sitting in my Maths class fed up ( depression). Decide to try a different youth club to my regular one. I ask my friends if they go to any good ones, a friend invited me to one they go to sometimes. It's a bit out of my way but his mum offered to give me and a couple of other girls a lift there. We get there and a little while later a truly stunning looking boy walks in. I literally stopped what I was doing I was completely hooked but figured he'd never be interested in me . He walked straight up to another girl and hugged her (bugger I thought). I end up briefly talking to his friend but that's it. At the end of the night when everyone was leaving he says goodbye to me ( heart in throat I say bye back). A few days later the friend I went with says that beautiful boy was asking about me. I think he's joking but give him my phone number anyway ( just in case ). A few more days and beautiful boy calls and asks me out. WeAl
Makes me feel extremely lucky I've never had to deal with anything horrible
Load More Replies...(before cell phones) When they're late for dinner and you start wishing they had been involved in a fatal accident.
I want to use this medium to testify of how i get back my Lover after divorce, i and my Lover have been married for 2 years with 2 kids, we have been a happy family. Last year his behavior towards me and the kids changed, i suspected he was meeting another woman outside out marriage, any time i confronted him, he threatened to divorce me, i did all i could to make things right but all to no avail until i saw a post on a "love and relationship forum" about a spell caster who helps people to cast spell on marriage and relationship issues, when i contacted this spell caster via email, he helped me cast a re-union spell and my Lover changed and came apologizing to me and the kids. Contact this great spell caster for your relationship or marriage issues via this email: address. Blackspelltemple@gmail.com or WhatsApp him +380501944596.
Everyone has a life story, I am so happy to have my lover back again after 8 good months of separation. I never thought we will live a happy life together again, but today, I am so glad for what ( Priestess Joy Onobun ) the spell caster did for me as she cast a reconciliation love spell for me to bring back my Ex to live together with me again. My testimony to everyone who is in the same situation as i was,should Contact The Great Dr Onobun now and Get your problem solved... WhatsApp................2349155287171 Email..............onobuntemple@gmail.com https://www.facebook.com/Onobunlovespell-103169402195792/ http://dronobunspellhome.blogspot.com
Sounds like big bullshit. Both partners in a relationship should be equal. Also, what do you think should happen if the woman wants to end the relationship and the man not? Or if it's two women/two men in a same sex relationship? Oh my, your reality will collapse!
Load More Replies...I don't want to come across as smug, but reading this post reminds me how amazing my own relationship is. Things are shitty in several aspects of my life, but my bond with my wife isn't one of them. She's my rock, and I'm hers. However, I've definitely experienced some of these points in previous relationships.
These aren't red flags - these are the giant red banners you're wrapped in after having ignored the red flags for years.
When they knowingly restrain your limbs when you have a phobia and don't let go as you scream 'get off!!' over and over again. Then they try to change the narrative, saying they were just trying to cuddle you, and suddenly you started punching them?? Then they come home, pour juice over your head and smear food in your hair and face while screaming at you for not apologising to them when you have already apologised over and over. Last night was interesting.
hmm that's assault. lay a charge, get a restraining order, and move out.
Load More Replies...Always reassuring to read an article like this and be completely befuddled at the thought of any of it happening between my wife and I.
When you ask yourself 'What have they done to make my life better?' or 'What am I getting out of this?' And you can't think of anything, it's time to go.
How about taunting you and having five hour arguments over who you sat next to at an event, telling you they don't want you talking to direct family/friends, searching your phone without permission, purposefully saying homophobic and racist things to get a rise out of your family and friends and think it's funny, all while you are 5 months pregnant. Is that reason enough? (She left him last night and he is trying to garner sympathy from me since I'm her strong sister, good luck buddy).
My ex-husband was a bit of anarcissist. It's gotten a little better in the last few years though ... according to our sons. Back then (almost 30 years ago) it almost drove me insane how selfish he was often and how important it was to him, to always “look good” in front of others. I also have a few quirks and certainly made a lot of mistakes when we were together, but the worst part for me was his behavior after the breakup. He has been inconsiderate towards the children and me and often acted without thinking about the effect on us. His main priority was clearly his "new life" ... we just weren't important enough anymore.
I got several: Being withdrawn; wanting to spend some time apart; refusing to tell/refusing communication whenever there was something wrong. My ex did all that, when I obliviously thought things were fine. They were terrible at communication, and that was common throughout the relationship, regardless of how thick and thin things were. And they would tell me that things were fine whenever I asked if there was anything wrong. They ended up leaving me for someone else.
1: When they want to start a cult, and not in like the funny way, like a cult dedicated to mac and cheese or whatever. No, an actual cult, with a rule book and everything, because they want to create a new world where everyone loves them and no one ever tells them they're wrong. 2: They "joke" about cutting off your legs and eating them. 3: They say they're gonna kill your grandma. 4: They tell you they hate your friends and then get pissed off when said friends block them. 5: They tell you that your favorite band sucks and then a couple of weeks later they pretend to be a fan. 6: They get mad at you for talking to your friend because they think you're "flirting" but then they go off and hit on other people in front of you. 7: When you can't make a joke without them interrogating you. 8: When you finally get clean, pull your head out of your ass, and break up with them, they spam you on several different accounts begging you to take them back.
9: They lie about you to a s**t ton of people. 10: They still won't leave you alone because they have your username on a website where you can't block people.
Load More Replies...I was in a bad relationship for 5 years with a guy who was emotionally abusive. I didn't realise it at the time, it was my first serious relationship. Despite all of the HUGE red flags and awful treatment I stayed with him even after trying to leave (I think this is typical for an abusive relationship). Anyway the point when the lightbulb went off in my head wasn't any of the awful things he did or said to me. It was when I was returning from overseas and expected my dad to be greeting me at the airport. I was in quite a happy mood as I hadn't seen anyone for a few months. Instead I emerged and saw my then-partner (he'd asked my dad to not go, so he could surprise me instead). I instantly felt a severe sense of dread and wanted to turn around, run back through the airport and get back on any flight going anywhere. I knew that meant I really had to leave him. Took a long time but eventually I did.
Age 15 in 1996. Sitting in my Maths class fed up ( depression). Decide to try a different youth club to my regular one. I ask my friends if they go to any good ones, a friend invited me to one they go to sometimes. It's a bit out of my way but his mum offered to give me and a couple of other girls a lift there. We get there and a little while later a truly stunning looking boy walks in. I literally stopped what I was doing I was completely hooked but figured he'd never be interested in me . He walked straight up to another girl and hugged her (bugger I thought). I end up briefly talking to his friend but that's it. At the end of the night when everyone was leaving he says goodbye to me ( heart in throat I say bye back). A few days later the friend I went with says that beautiful boy was asking about me. I think he's joking but give him my phone number anyway ( just in case ). A few more days and beautiful boy calls and asks me out. WeAl
Makes me feel extremely lucky I've never had to deal with anything horrible
Load More Replies...(before cell phones) When they're late for dinner and you start wishing they had been involved in a fatal accident.
I want to use this medium to testify of how i get back my Lover after divorce, i and my Lover have been married for 2 years with 2 kids, we have been a happy family. Last year his behavior towards me and the kids changed, i suspected he was meeting another woman outside out marriage, any time i confronted him, he threatened to divorce me, i did all i could to make things right but all to no avail until i saw a post on a "love and relationship forum" about a spell caster who helps people to cast spell on marriage and relationship issues, when i contacted this spell caster via email, he helped me cast a re-union spell and my Lover changed and came apologizing to me and the kids. Contact this great spell caster for your relationship or marriage issues via this email: address. Blackspelltemple@gmail.com or WhatsApp him +380501944596.
Everyone has a life story, I am so happy to have my lover back again after 8 good months of separation. I never thought we will live a happy life together again, but today, I am so glad for what ( Priestess Joy Onobun ) the spell caster did for me as she cast a reconciliation love spell for me to bring back my Ex to live together with me again. My testimony to everyone who is in the same situation as i was,should Contact The Great Dr Onobun now and Get your problem solved... WhatsApp................2349155287171 Email..............onobuntemple@gmail.com https://www.facebook.com/Onobunlovespell-103169402195792/ http://dronobunspellhome.blogspot.com
Sounds like big bullshit. Both partners in a relationship should be equal. Also, what do you think should happen if the woman wants to end the relationship and the man not? Or if it's two women/two men in a same sex relationship? Oh my, your reality will collapse!
Load More Replies...