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According to communication researcher and social scientist Elizabeth Dorrance Hall, attributions are thoughts we have about people that help us make sense of why others do the things they do.

There are two types of attributions we make about others' behavior:

When we make situational attributions, we believe their behavior is due to something in their situation. For instance, our coworker might have been short with us, because he is tired or overworked.

Personality attributions are more about a person's character. When we make these attributions, we believe the behavior is due to the person's personality. Assuming that the same coworker who was short with us is impatient or unkind is making a personality attribution.

Focusing on the latter, Reddit user u/booja87 posted a question to the platform: "What's something you secretly judge people about?" And people answered it. Here are some of the most interesting replies.

#2

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) The way people treat animals. I'm an Indian I have seen my fair share of abuse of street dogs and other domestic animals. The way people care for their pets or in general any animal. If I have a pack of biscuits and I see a stray puppy that's looking at me, I'll always empty out the packet for it to eat. What I mean to say is, acts of compassion and kindness towards animals does tell a lot about the humanity of the person.

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TJay
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I totally judge people by how they treat animals...animal abusers suck

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#3

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) People who litter. Scum of the earth

r0ll3rsk8 , John Cameron Report

#4

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) How they treat servers, waitstaff, or hotel clerks. Nothing irritates me more than grown-ass adults who think service professionals are somehow beneath them or that they're somehow indentured servants. And how they treat janitors/custodial staff, and whether people leave more of a mess than they should because 'it’s their job to clean up after [them]

Linux4ever_Leo , Egor Gordeev Report

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BetterBitterButter
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This. I have seen people with very high educational qualifications misbehaving and treating cleaners, waiters, gatekeepers etc and treating them like they are not humans. No matter how much schooling such people have done they are not educated.

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#5

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) People who use their speakerphone for music or conversations in public places. I hate it

Billy_MacC , Aaron Goodwin Report

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Marianne
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Rule #1: If the conversation is on speaker, it is allowed to join the conversation and ask for details.

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#6

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) Not wearing masks properly. My job the last year has involved making sure people wear masks properly. I don’t understand people who wear it but under their nose or chin. Like what is the point?

Environmental-Bit177 , Sara Kurfeß Report

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Hermien Greeff
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This should be higher. Someone with the mask under the nose irritates me even more than someone with no masks. Just do it right, it is so so easy. Or people with masks that are clearly too big or loose so they have to pull it back up every 5 seconds.

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#7

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) Cheating. Apparently this is an unpopular opinion in the world now, but I have a severe fear of being cheated on. I think it’s horrible. So whenever I hear one of my friends talk/almost brag about cheating on their partner, I automatically lose a lot of respect for them.

Sea_Cover7486 , pixabay Report

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Giovanna
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well, honestly what kind of person brags about cheating on their partner?

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#8

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) Not liking animals. It’s one thing not to want a pet — they’re a lot of time and money. But people who say, 'I don’t like animals' get a hard side-eye from me.

Sad-Outside-7260 , PEXELS Report

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AnnaBanana
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I don't trust ANYONE who doesn't like animals. I get it that some people prefer not to be jumped on by dogs, or having a demanding cat want to jump in their lap, but to outright say you "hate" animals is a massive warning for me that there's something not right about that person.

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#10

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) How their kids behave and their parenting choices. When the parents think a tantrum is funny or cute. I was watching a little girl throw a huge fit at a store the other day, and the mom and grandma were both giggling about how 'sassy' she was

mwalker324 , pixabay Report

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Renee Letkiewicz
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Don't judge too much... being a parent is hard and sometimes kids can be assholes. Lol

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#11

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) People who have to try and dominate every discussion or have to one-up every other person who contributes to the discussion.

HealthHappy9890 , Mimi Thian Report

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Lauren Caswell
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I was taught that sharing similar stories was a way to talk to people: with time I have learned that this is dangerously close to above behaviour of one-upping, and always try to watch myself when chatting so i dont do this reflex when im nervous. It comes across as selfish to people sometimes i think, but there was a difference in my mind anyway between one upping, or listening and letting them tell you how it felt, and sometimes sharing an experience in return, like a show of solidarity? I just don't know nowadays maybe I am coming across rude to all, not just some?

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#12

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) Leaving cigarette butts everywhere. Bonus judgement if it's still "fired up" and they don't care where it lands.

snikinail , janekszy46 Report

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AnnaBanana
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm a smoker and I never put butts anywhere they're not supposed to go. Living in Australia and seeing catastrophic fires started by some loser flicking a lit butt out a car window makes you pretty careful!

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#13

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) Volume of their voice

sneakertotheizm , Marie-Michèle Bouchard Report

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Donkey boi
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My cousin talks so loud it's almost shouting. He's deaf in one ear as a result of a lightning strike. Unless someone tells him, he doesn't realise he's being so loud. So maybe don't judge...

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M O'Connell
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My HR director at work has absolutely no volume control, apparently due to falling out of a tree at 16.

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fire bug
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm guilty of this. I tend to be loud. Its not that I am trying to overpower the conversation but my voice carries better than some and I do tend to talk loudly. :(

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Aunt Messy
Community Member
2 years ago

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You know this, so learn to tone it down. You're bragging about being obnoxious.

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Moona Teljomaa
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When I get excited about something (which happens a lot, I'm too easily excited), my volume goes way way up, without me realising it. :( My better half points it out, but we are not always in the same place. So, I apologize for my behalf, I don't do it in purpose.

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Dude!
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have ADHD, and many people with adhd don’t realize how loud they are. Be careful about how you correct it, as many of us also have rejection sensitivity!!

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Valisbourne Spiritforge
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I hate going into a restaurant and I can't hear my wife talking to me from across the (not wide) table for all of the loud mouths sitting and nearby tables.

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cassiushumanmother
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Last time i was at a restaurant with my mother and a woman behind her was shouting during her entire meal(they were just 2 at their table,in front of each other), we knew it all about her sad life, teacher training, bad coworkers... I was imitating her and my mother was like "shhhh", and when it was the time the waiter ask them if they would like a dessert, i just told a bit loudly to my mother " they don't deserve a dessert". The obnoxious woman was doing it on purpose, so everybody can enjoy her conversation in a tiny restaurant. If it weren't for my shy delicate mother i would have shout and imitate her until she would stop, like a kid because she was acting like a brat. I'm French and in my country if you act like that that's more than disrespectful, you may get stabbed with a fork by another customer or even the waiter or owner if it's at a fancy restaurant. If you can't behave, go to a cafeteria, brasserie or fast food place, where you can make all the noise you want.

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Tenement_Funster
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I want to downvote this a million times. There are people (like me) who have problems with their ears/hearing and don't notice if they're talking louder than others. Reading something like this makes me feel really bad about myself.

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Anna McHugh
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes - loudness generally is indicative of someone who hasn't developed any kind of self-awareness. They're only interested in satisfying/communicating their own state and completely unaware that other people a) exist and b) are uncomfortable because of this.

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Jessica Aubé
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Thats a pretty broad, general, and unfair assumption .. someone may not be self aware but that doesn’t mean they are only interested in their own communication

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Helen Burns
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I naturally seem to have a loud voice and I project really easily. I work in a school so a lot of the time, it’s a positive when dealing with classes. But also, my mum was deaf in her later years and my current assistant is deaf (she’s uses powerful hearing aids). At the end of a day, I forget to turn the volume down and there are times I walk away from a conversation cringing at how loud I realise I probably was. Being loud isn’t always about trying to shout everyone else down. Volume aside, I’m not a loud (extroverted) person by nature so it’s not a reflection of that. Some people are quiet or mumblers, others are louder. I think I’ve always been that way as I remember at age 5 being chosen to do a reading in class as I had “a nice clear voice”. I’m actually a quiet person… just not when I speak! Please don’t judge me for it! 😳🤫

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blue
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I also have a naturally loud voice 99 % of the time I have no idea I am practically shouting. Until I see a look of discomfort on someone's face or they step back from me. Then I realize I am being way to loud. I am.really embarrassed by it and try to work on speaking softer but natural habits are hard to break. My sister is the same way. I am not an attention seeker and feel horrified by this. I wish I was not like this. Please do not judge.

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Esther Evans
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I know everyone is going to judge me....I'm hard of hearing, and my own family have told me I have no volume control....I wish people around me would speak up, because with all the masks at this time I can't even lip read !! I find when I'm faced with someone who won't speak up, I get even louder...So judge away everybody and while you're at it, pray that you don't ever have a hearing problem....

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Getthepopcornout
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have anxiety and borderline personality disorder, in stressful situations I can often become louder and struggle to control my volume as my adrenaline levels are out of this world and that's how it often comes out alongside "attention seeking behaviours". In reality it often means I want to get the hell out of the situation but don't know how without making a scene. I often go home afterwards and go over every word and behaviour in my head kicking myself for acting like an idiot. Not everyone is just obnoxious and attention seeking.

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Mrs. Jan Glass
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You're aware, and working on it. That matters. There is always some a-hole who is going to claim that our behaviors from anxiety and disorders is just us wanting attention, anyway.

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Bisexual Backflipping
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yes!! I mean, I want to have a conversation, not have you yelling like I'm across the world! I can hear you!

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Megan Johnson
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I struggle with volume control. Especially if I'm excited, anxious, etc. I don't notice at all. The worst part is how ashamed I feel when someone tells me I'm being too loud. They're right, but it's painfully embarrassing for some reason. It's hard not to cry.

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Vicky Z
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You won't have fun if you come to Greece... yes we are loud! I don't realise it when I'm in Greece but I'm so annoyed when i travel abroad and there is a company next to me yelling and i instantly know it's Greeks!! We can't help it although we should...

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blue
Community Member
2 years ago

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Bear Hall
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Some very nice people get carried away so easily they don't notice their volume. They know this well and usually very apologetic when they are asked to pipe down as long as they are asked nicely. Please don't judge the book only by the cover.

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Katia Wolfe
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My voice is naturally loud and carries. It's not like I'm trying to dominate a conversation, I literally use the same voice when no one else is talking. My best friends laugh at me sometimes bc I've explained that it actually takes EFFORT for me to turn down my volume to what they consider normal, the way it takes effort for other people to whisper or sing. It feels unnatural and requires concentration. I've learned to dial it down in office situations or quiet public places, but when I'm in a relaxed environment where I feel comfortable, I'm not going to concentrate on my natural volume and my real friends don't judge me.

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AnnaBanana
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My Mum's going deaf and it absolutely pains me to have to yell at her to talk! I speak very quietly and hate yellers!

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Melanie Burlock
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

People who are loud often don’t realize that they’re loud . It’s often linked with hearing. Some people also just talk from their diaphragm, so they have a natural theatre voice. It’s REALLY hard to lower the volume when that’s how you talk, because you don’t realize you’re doing it.

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Yeeters
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

that is absolutely nothing to judge anyone about. People who have hearing issues are a real life thing. That's like judging someone by the way they walk. I am loud, always have been. I literally cannot hear the difference between my mumbling voice and my shouting voice. I hear everything else perfectly, just not my own voice.

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Aave
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My coworker was super loud. I am a very quiet person who hates loud noises in general, so I kind of avoided her from the beginning until I learned that she's deaf from one ear, and doesn't always know if she's being too loud and is quite embarrassed because of it. I became more understanding and felt a bit ashamed, I hadn't even thought about the possibility that she simply might not realize how loud she speaks. I just assumed she wants attention. We didn't become besties but were much friendlier to each other. It was a learning experience for me, I shouldn't assume things so easily.

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Fact Perils
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah, I'm insecure about this. I grew up in a loud household and so I instinctually talk louder if I'm not in public.

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Margaret Martin
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have severe Tinnitus... certain high pitched sounds (ex: deep fryer alarms, loose car belts, speaker feedback) in music, commercials, grocery stores & restaurants set it off. It gets so loud I can't hear myself speaking & often; My Husband has tossed a wad of paper or has to wave at me when I'm too loud.

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Melissa Girvan Grant
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm autistic and sometimes don't get the volume right. If people judge me on that, oh well!

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Jan Jansen
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

LOL. And in my experience people who talk very loudly are still the hardest to understand because they often speak in a thick regional accent and don't articulate.

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Turtle42
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

To be fair. I'm 60% deaf. And before my hearing aid. I didn't even realize I was talking loud. And I still struggle at times to lower my voice. So if there is a reason behind them being loud I'm forgiving.

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s. vitkovitsky
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Maybe some people should adk Santa for an indoor voice. But this is hardly a big deal.

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Liz Pilla
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm hearing impaired, from experience I can tell you that many "loud talkers" are also hearing impaired and don't know it. They could also be drunk but don't jump to conclusions. If you know them personally, you may want to discuss it with them

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Porch Santa
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Well this is a first. I have met her. My voice carries and have been shushed. Woops!

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blue
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I am a loud talker and have no idea I am. Unless someone tells me or I see a look on their face I am clueless. Don't judge. I am always so embarrassed when I see someone step back or cringe and suddenly realise I am practically shouting

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NeonDisco
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I'm sorry to say this but...... This is a female issue where I live, it's always teenage girls standing side by side, yet talking as if they are 20 feet apart.

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Edamame
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

i know that i'm loud and i try to keep it down but it's really just who i am and it really hurts me when somebody tells me to "shut up" or "you're voice is really annoying, can you be quiet?"

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BlackPearltheSeaWing/NightWing
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

My sister's natural volume is yelling. We tell her to be quiet and she talks normal for a few seconds, and then right back up to full volume.

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Alexia
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I had a colleague who used to literally scream on the phone, or during face to face conversations. She was aware that it was disturbing and rude to us, and that screaming was not an argument in a conversation - but she didn't care. However we, the other 3 people in the small office, were expected to be very quiet and careful no to disturb her when she was busy (so it was not lack of self-awareness).

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Ivy la Sangrienta
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

You can always spot the Americans (in Europe anyway) by the sheer volume.

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Mrs. Jan Glass
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

American expat here. This is 95% true! It depends on the places. The loud-talkers in parts of Spain are usually English, and in a few African countries, I discovered that it was the German tourists who were the most obnoxious ones. For a while in America, it was Japanese and Chinese tourists who were loudest and most obnoxious, but a good part of their tourism in America was in large groups, so that added to it.

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N G
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This extends both ways - too quiet and I'll struggle to hear. Please pick a volume appropriate to the venue and audience.

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Ozacoter
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I cant. When i go to my grandmas and i need ti raise my voice to be heard my throat hurts a lot afterwards. Some people speak naturally low

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Nikki Owens
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is a cultural thing. Some people are raised in loud families and a loud culture; quietness is more valued in others. I was raised to value quietness and to modulate my tone & volume, because being loud was considered rude and a sign of being low class. I try not to let that color my judgements of others, but to be perfectly honest I have noticed in my life a pretty strong correlation between the volume at which a person speaks and their general intelligence.

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#14

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) Not putting their shopping cart back. My first job was to collect carts and bag groceries. If I can put my cart away with two small children in tow, so can you!

eeznutz066 , David Clarke Report

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Giovanna
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We have to put a coin in the carts in order to unlock them and use them. The coin gets returned when you put the cart back. I honestly have never seen carts not put back.

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#16

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) The background wallpaper on their phone. Especially when it's a picture of themselves. Who puts a photo of themselves as the background photo on their phone? Weird!

floralboi , Dmitriy Tyukov Report

#17

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) If you have a new phone or fancy nails and your kid has worn out shoes, I will judge the [hell] out of you.

Grumblegrumblehiss , sharon McCutcheon's profile Sharon McCutcheon Report

#18

I’ve come to realize that I find negative comments about personal appearance vulgar (joking about a person’s weight, face, how old they look, etc.).
Anybody who thinks it’s funny to repeatedly joke about how ugly so-and-so is, or how fat, or how bald? UGH. It really makes the commenter seem mean and unsophisticated to me.

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JennyLaRue
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is why I struggle to watch any Adam Sandler movie - he always has characters there solely to insult on a personal level. It doesn't even add anything to the story

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#19

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) Spelling . You don't know how to write 'anaerobic'? No worries mate, it's a rare word and who needs to use it anyway? But if you're unable to use their/they're/there properly, which you have literally seen being used correctly a thousand times, then I can't guarantee I will ever consider you a bright person.

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Thomas Price
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

One challenge to this is that the person may have dyslexia and therefore have difficulty with this. Got to remember you will never know what someone else’s challenges are so don’t be too quick to judge

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#20

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) People who gossip to me about other people. I always wonder what they say about me behind my back.

oskoMondaricci , hnd Report

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Mazer
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I have asked people to stop I’m not interested and I will just walk away

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#21

How snobbish a person is about someone else's situation (information about wage, job, family situation, living situation, etc., and making a comment on it). They should try working on their feet for 10 hours in a hot, greasy kitchen before criticizing someone for 'flipping burgers

ScreechPrimus Report

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J. F.
Community Member
2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Never got that attitude. Truckdrivers, cleaning personal or garbage disposal get treated like they're at the end of the career food chain. But if they would stop working the modern society would collapse within a month

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#22

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) Bad table manners. If I’ve ever shared a meal with you and you chewed with your mouth open or made food noises, I promise that during the entire meal, I’ve fantasized about your death.

Toadie9622 , Matt Seymour Report

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Ueda
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Don't ever go to Korea then. I used to live there and would go eating out with my colleagues very frequently. It took time getting used to the table manners there, as making a lot of noise when eating is pretty common over there. Almost everyone does it; from the teenage girl to the old man. It's just how it is.

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#23

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) People who constantly film their kids at recitals and things like that. Take a few pictures, then put ur devices down and actually watch it. No point in filming a 20 minute video that you’re never gonna watch again.

Also, people who go to firework shows…AND FILM THE FIREWORKS, for more than 4 seconds. That’s something you are REALLY never gonna watch again. Just live in the moment, take a couple pics, and move on

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Le Vi Nguyen
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I mean this could really depend. The parents might want to film their kids and send it to the grandparents. Some families live across the globe from each other and they would want to share special moments with their love ones.

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#24

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) What part of their life are they posting on social media. Especially when they post every tiny problem in a relationship on social media

evilislive13 , Kate Torline Report

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I want cake
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I firmly believe in the theory that a healthy relationship is barely apparent on social media, because the people in it don't crave the validation to make them feel good about it. Relationships that are splashed all over social media, particularly with gushing captions about how perfect it is always give me the impression of two people trying to convince themselves.

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#25

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) The behavior of their dog. There are of course allowances for dogs that were adopted/rescued that weren’t trained for a period of their lives, and some dogs have reactive behavior that’s difficult to overcome even with diligent work. However, if the only reason your dog is a little [jerk] is because you don’t care enough to train them right, I’m sitting here in judgment.

EndoShota , James Barker Report

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Magpie
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It is fine to love a pet, but for crying out loud get yourself educated on how to handle them correctly. How to make sure *their* needs are met.

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#26

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) Craving for attention. As an introvert, people who do that are very easy to notice and very annoying.

hoscct , Jessica Da Rosa Report

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Julie C Rose
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This possibly sounds reasonable without context, but spend some time on /r/unpopularopinion and you’ll learn that a lot of Redditors have a pathological hatred of anyone who reaches out in even the most benign ways. I’ve seen them call cancer patients “attention seekers”. Multiple times.

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#27

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) When they talk badly about people they were acting nice towards

InternationalFace457 , naassomz1 Report

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Dynein
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Grey area. Are we talking about being polite to strangers, then sharing what was weird about them when they are gone? Talking badly about a weird relative or friend's friend you don't like but can't avoid? There are plenty of times when you're expected to be courteous to people you don't get along with for whatever reasons, which can be exhausting so I think it's fine to vent afterwards! What crosses the line IMO is when it delves into gossip and/or when you act like outright friends with them. Thought the line can be difficult to define across personal and cultural differences.

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#28

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) How open they are to differing opinions. There are certain people who immediately get defensive or shut down the whole discussion when they disagree with something, instead of having an actual conversation about it.

crazy_cosmonaut , jamesoladujoye Report

#29

How you prioritize your money. Not how you spend it as I couldn’t care less if you can afford it, but if you’re the type of person who’s tight on money and spending it willy nilly or spending out of your means and justifying it, then your ceiling for being a bright person drops significantly. One of my exes said they had $40 in their bank account during the peak of the pandemic. She had no job and she thought she earned going to get a manicure and blowing even more than what she could afford since I think she needed to borrow money to make up for the cost. I told her that was a stupid purchase and she kept trying to justify it by saying it’s been too long and that she felt like she earned herself a treat. No. If you have $40, your treat could potentially be a McFlurry from the drive thru. Not a manicure

I want to clarify again it’s not like getting a manicure is bad, but prioritizing it when you have $40 to your name is freaking moronic

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#30

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) People who are involved with MLMs I think they are untrustworthy or somewhat dumb.

newstart3385 , pixabay Report

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Monday
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

MLM - mulit-level marketing. Companies like Avon or Herbalife that encourage their employees to recruit people below them in order to make money. You make more money tricking others into signing up as a seller than you do from actually selling the product. It's essentially a pyramid scheme that has somehow managed to stay in the legal grey zone.

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#31

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) Parents who try to convince me to let their kid in a ride when they’re not big enough. Even when I tell them it’s for their own safety and the restraints aren’t designed for smaller people. It’s like they don’t care if their kid gets majorly hurt.

Also parents who force their kids on rides they don’t want to get on. Traumatizing them and making them fear rides in general, but also not realizing that kids OFTEN try to climb out if rides they’re scared of, which is very dangerous!

mpmwrites , josepons28 Report

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J. F.
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2 years ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I remember the times I was forced to get into rollercoasters, totally not a horror ride for children with a fear of heights

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#32

If you speed up to block someone with their turn signal on, you will be judged.

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Karl Baxter
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Good road manners and consideration for one’s fellow motorist tends to cause a positive ripple effect as the person you let into the traffic flow/cross lanes/give way for, etc is likely (in the name of good karma) to extend the same courtesy to another motorist and so on and so forth. Of course some drivers will always be selfish idiots but they’re the exception.

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#33

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) How they treat their coworkers

Seam0re , tumisu Report

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J. F.
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Always take a look on how people treat the janitor and/or the cleaning staff.

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#34

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) If I go to use the bathroom in their house and it's crusty, dusty, and covered in hair and God knows what else.

SquilliamFancySon95 , Eden, Janine and Jim Report

#35

Taking video/FaceTime calls walking around the grocery store. Generally any public speaker phone/broadcast of their private sh*t like conversations and music. What the f**k have we come to with the combo of disregard for others and the narcissism?

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TK 421
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I do the FaceTime thing when I’m sent on a mission by my wife for some weird grocery item and have no clue what I’m looking for. Typically, I’m in the wrong store, and I am fairly certain that she does that to me on purpose.

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#36

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) What they say about their kids in social media. I get that being a parent is hard, and it’s okay to talk/vent/be real about that online, but sometimes people cross the line and talk about their kids as if they’re not real people, just because they’re not grown and don’t have a Facebook account. People should imagine what their kids would think if they were all grown up and reading your internet history. If you think they would be hurt by what you said, don’t post it

adamislolz , Vitolda Klein Report

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Giovanna
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2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

To me, in general, would be posting your children's pictures on Facebook or Instagram. Some people use their kids to get followers. I think this is borderline criminal.

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#37

People who act like the "anti-hero" in their own story. It seems more people I see these days dont want to be the hero in their own lives but want to be the "complex dark villain with a tragic past and stone cold appearance, but have a heart of gold" it's like no. Dave with your 4 bedroom 2 story house that your parents helped buy after you graduated university, and you now live in with your 2 kids and loving wife, are not an anti-hero and posting things like, "I'm a calm man but mess with me and I will break your bones" does not make you cool or complex.

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albernistuff 4sale
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We are all the protagonist in our own lives. We grow up seeing ourselves as the good guy in order to delude ourselves that we haven't REALLY hurt anyone. Later in life, when you reflect on your behaviour, it is then you find your were the villain in someone else's story

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#38

People who can’t get another person’s name right in an email conversation. It’s literally right there in my signature; there’s no excuse for calling me by the wrong name. Drives me crazy. I can sign off with my first name and have it in my signature, and people still reply, 'Hi, [Surname.]' [Screw] those guys. It’s not even a surname that could be mistaken for a first name. It just looks a wee bit foreign, so their brain stops working

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Hermien Greeff
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I got an email this weekend from a copywriter, and she spelled my name completely wrong. Guess who did not get the job.

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#39

I have an acquaintance who posts things about herself In the third person via inspirational memes. For example ( one of ten a week): “ She weathered the storm and trudged through the lightening because the electricity of the pain only ignited her fuel to accomplish more” ( I made that up but you get the picture). I judge this. I think it’s pathetic.

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Nat Hedley
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I judge people who link up with people they clearly don't like on social media just to get the +1 to their friends count.

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#40

Viral Thread Has People Admitting What Things They Secretly Judge Others For (40 Comments) What they name their kids.

harperthehomemaker , Nathan Dumlao Report

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Kat
Community Member
2 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think it isn't anyone's business what I name my kids. Even when these names are weird (which they are not, just noting that).

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