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Oscar Wilde once said, "Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit but the highest form of intelligence." Regardless, PR experts and marriage counselors often advise their clients to stay away from it. The reason is simple: this form of expression can sting others, hurting people and harming relationships. As a communication tool, it dances on the edge of conflict.
But sometimes, throwing sparks and seeing if they catch fire is precisely what you want. Especially when everyone and everything around you tickles your nerves. Which is something we all sometimes feel. (I hope.)
So let's take a look at the Instagram account 'Sarcasm Only.' Sharing memes, tweets, and all kinds of content, it manages to pinpoint universal human emotion despite firing shots in every direction. If there's one place you need to get through a lousy, it's this little corner of the internet. I mean, why else would 16 million people follow it?
More info: Instagram
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#1
GoddessOdd 3 years ago
I am torn between my inner child, my wannabe hipster and my inner granny. It's a difficult life.
AnnaBanana 3 years ago
I have the opposite problem. Now that I'm old, my inner child is constantly egging me on to behave like a reprobate!
BORKADYMUSIC 3 years ago
My brain is a combination of a classic rock obsessed 33 year old and a 6 year old who loves dinosaurs haha I love this
Aisling Raye 3 years ago
I named my inner old lady "Ethel" 16 or so years ago when I was in my early twenties. It's been a joke within our family for so long now that she has developed a backstory and writes recipes for family and friends at the holidays.
RELATED:
#2
DennyS (denzoren) 3 years ago
Bro, I'm fresh out of the academy...let's just...take it one day at a time. Lol
Loki’s Lil Butter Knife 3 years ago
Dog: "Oh geez Carol, have you perhaps thought of getting a therapy cat instead?"
Travis Fox 3 years ago
Become a therapy dog they said. It'll be fun, they said. And here i thought maybe be a fluffy shoulder to cry on. Or even help with a calm hug n kisses during a panic attacks. That i can handle. But this! This sh*t is insane!
Grace Skerp 3 years ago
You did What with Who and you did it Where?! How did you do that and WHY?!!
In fact, scientists are finding that the ability to detect sarcasm really is useful. For the past 20 years, linguists, psychologists, neurologists, and other researchers have been analyzing our ability to perceive snarky remarks and gaining new insights into how the mind works. Their studies have shown that exposure to sarcasm enhances creative problem solving, for instance.
You could say sarcasm detection is an essential skill if one is going to function in a modern society dripping with irony. "Our culture, in particular, is permeated with sarcasm,” Katherine Rankin, a neuropsychologist at the University of California at San Francisco, told Smithsonian Magazine. "People who don't understand sarcasm are immediately noticed. They're not getting it. They're not socially adept."
#3
Otter 3 years ago
That would be the only way I'd ever join a throuple, if his girlfriend liked housework.
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Enby.Minecraft.Bee. 3 years ago
Or the man can learn basic life skills and can cook and clean for himself.
Wondering Alice 3 years ago
My sister in law use to rather weirdly come over when we were out and wash and iron all my husband's clothes (separating them from mine). Wish I had made more of an effort to pretend it bugged me. She stopped once she clicked it made me happy
Vee Lyons 3 years ago
That's so odd. If it were is mother, bad enough, but his sister? dafuq. btw, why did she have the key to your home?
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De Gueb 3 years ago
Never expect my GF to cook or clean for me. been cooking, washing and cleaning since I was 16
Rachael Sampson 3 years ago
Hopefully he learns to do things for himself too and doesn't need a glorified maid.
Ann Coffman 3 years ago
Me too! Especially during a snowstorm when the electricity is off!!!!
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#4
Kate Jones 3 years ago
Do you think regular horses see a horse like this an think like how gorgeous she is and then have some kind of horse-body image issues?
Carrie Laughs 3 years ago
I love Eeyore! Also, when you know why the author A A Milne wrote the characters as they are and the lessons they were for his son in post-war trauma and what would be called PTSD today... well, you really see Eeyore differently.
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#5
Susie Elle 3 years ago
I once took a nap on Monday afternoon and woke up an hour later thinking I slept through the entire night and day after, thinking it was Tuesday already. I freaked out and went to my dad going full Jumanji WHAT YEAR IS IT?!!
Meg Headrick 3 years ago
I did that too lol! I saw 9:00 on my phone and thought "I SLEPT UNTIL 9PM?!?" 😂
Load More Replies... GoddessOdd 3 years ago
I used to work a full time night job and attend classes during the day, and there were about 40 miles between the two. My mom's house was almost right in the middle, so I would go to her house, grab a quick nap, grab some food and go. Many times I had to ask my mom which direction I was supposed to go when I left, and what day it was.
Layla Corman 3 years ago
I have dreams that I never made up my math (its always math- my worst subject) classes from HS. I go running in to the classroom only to find it empty then I stress for the rest of the dream that I won't graduate. IRL I made up those classes 22 years ago and graduated. 😞
Blackstone 3 years ago
It's been a while, but I used to dream I was supposed to be in a class and had missed it for an entire semester and it was almost exam time and I'd never been to class. I still had these dreams a decade after graduating.
Load More Replies... Betsy Novack 3 years ago
Nope. Woke up and got dressed in two minutes , ran out to mar car and called work and I'd be there real quick. 7pm and 7am look exactly the same sometimes. The guy I worked with said "you just left a couple hours ago. You do know it's 7pm, right?" I did then. Went back to bed after setting my alarm.
Kylie 2 years ago
Ha ha, done the same thing except I work nights and the morning shift gal says "you know it's only 10AM, right?"
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Tenacious Squirrel 3 years ago
I still have dreams about forgetting to do my homework and mis-reading my timetable. I'm 37.
Hagen Radcliffe 3 years ago
Gotcha beat- 67, and still having school dreams!
Load More Replies... Sarcasm is so popular in 21st-century America that according to one study of a database of telephone conversations, 23 percent of the time that the phrase "Yeah, right" was used, it was uttered sarcastically.
Entire phrases have almost lost their literal meanings because they are so frequently said with a sneer. Take "Big deal," for example. When was the last time someone said that to you and actually meant it? "My heart bleeds for you" almost always equals "Tell it to someone who cares," and "Aren’t you special" means you aren’t.
"It's practically the primary language in modern society," John Haiman, a linguist at Macalester College in St. Paul, Minnesota, and the author of Talk is Cheap: Sarcasm, Alienation and the Evolution of Language, said.
#6
Madison Feehan 3 years ago
Let's start normalizing the fact that clothes are really expensive and deserve to be worn more than once!
User# 6 3 years ago
Frankly, these days people should be grateful if I bothered to put on trousers at all.
Erik Granqvist 3 years ago
The queen of Sweden is famous for reusing fancy outfits, as in the clothes she wear in official things like the Nobel Prize gathering. She has done this for a very long time, and the Crown Princess has taken after her mother. They alter the dresses, and maybe let them hang inmthe wardrobe for a couple of years. But they do not have them as 1-time-never-again items.
KatHat 3 years ago
Heh, make your own "uniform", it's the best. I buy all my tops (black) in multiples. Makes everything so much easier.
GoddessOdd 3 years ago
Yep, me too. I buy the same shirt in every color but it's still obviously the same shirt. I have never been a fashion plate, and now that I am old, I find I care even less.
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InfectedVoice 3 years ago
Right now I'm wearing a band shirt and cut off jeans that are at least 10 years old and a pair of allstars maybe 3 years old, I don't like new clothes.
Johnny 3 years ago
I've rotated through a small set of shirts and pants since the pandemic began and I started working from home full time. My wife and I were looking at a photo we took near the start of the pandemic, then looked down and realized we were wearing the exact same clothes as in the photo.
#7
Evil Hornet 3 years ago
literally cry-laughing right now :D The best photo I've seen today ;)
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Foxxy (The Original) 3 years ago
I have an urge to blow a raspberry on its cute lil belly. Is that weird? I think it's weird lol.
KariLovesHerKat 3 years ago
It most certainly is not weird. I think you may have to get in line
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#8
Deutschland Mädchen 3 years ago
Did you all hear about what Buren did yesterday? Scandalous! /s
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Luther von Wolfen 3 years ago
I never confirm or deny rumors about me. It's much more entertaining to just keep the mystery alive.
Summer Mason 3 years ago (edited)
Best one I heard was my husband was cheating on me. I cut my hair and dyed underneath. That mysterious woman he was seen with..... was me. 🤣
Julia Atkinson 3 years ago (edited)
"I haven't had the physical dexterity to do that since 1997"
Zenozenobee 3 years ago (edited)
Oh, I had a fun one once. A former classmate told me "Hey you remember X? She was in spanish with us? she's married to a woman!!!!". I told her she was wrong, that she wasn't married, but she kept insisting, so i gave up and let her with her beliefs. We were living together and I'm 100% sure I never married my then girlfriend but if a former classmate heard something, she must know better than us ;p
Brian Bennett 3 years ago
I just consider anyone who talks about me is a member of my fan club!
Chinmayee Kalghatgi 3 years ago
I had a rumor about me which was passed on by someone who did it for their own benefit. I ended up losing 90% of my friends and i never got to see them anymore
Helderder 3 years ago
I feel really bad for you but they were never your friends. A real friend would speak up for you and believe what you say
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Sarcastic statements are sort of a true lie. People are saying something they don’t literally mean, but the communication works as intended only if their listener gets that they're insincere.
Some language experts suggest sarcasm is used as a sort of gentler insult, a way to tone down criticism, but their opponents have found that the mocking, smug, superior nature of sarcasm is perceived as more hurtful than a plain-spoken criticism.
The Greek root for sarcasm, sarkazein, means to tear flesh like dogs. Haiman thinks dog-eat-dog sarcastic commentary is just part of our quest to be cool. "You're distancing yourself, you're making yourself superior. If you're sincere all the time, you seem naive."
#9
Madison Feehan 3 years ago
I was going to comment something smart but I'm so tired. I'll do it tomorrow.
GoddessOdd 3 years ago
I have found that many things I do today will need to be done again tomorrow anyway.
#10
ZAPanda 3 years ago (edited)
EXACTLY. this is why I refuse, despite being a good cook. Time is money. I just buy pre-made. Apologies to underpaid pre-made sandwich workers.
Paul O'Connor 3 years ago
Don't view everything through the lens of "money". Cooking can be enjoyable, therapeutic and an escape from other life stresses to many people. You're denying yourself that because that precious time could be spent earning cash?
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tuzdayschild 3 years ago
But I love cooking. Plus I clean as I go. By the time I sit down to eat everything is clean. Plus I don't gobble my food so it lasts longer than 10 minutes.
keepgoing 3 years ago
I hate cooking. Can I employ you? Or at least have some of your motivation :-D
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Red rockin lobster 3 years ago
Enjoy your food, talk to the person you're eating with, have some wine, eat slowly. If you have a dishwasher, it's heaven.
Izzy Curer 3 years ago
If one person cooks, the other washes and puts away. Those are the rules
Jess Thompson 3 years ago
I love cooking except when I have to 😂 but then do you ever find that you’re starving and you take forever to make a meal and by the time you’re done you’re not hungry anymore? Weirdest thing
Tami 3 years ago
Me too! Might have something to do with the open bag of chips sitting on the counter though.
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Not Proud British 3 years ago
Cooking for one is difficult and lonely. Cooking for a family might create a huge mess and take ages, but it's about more than the food. It's about conversation, sharing food, togetherness, etc. It's about making time to stop, sit down, eat and chat with your loved ones.
AnnaBanana 3 years ago
It's certainly challenging to cook for one, but it's not lonely. I love cooking for myself. I just have a really big freezer so I don't have to eat the same thing for a week! But you're right, I love cooking for family too, for all the reasons you mentioned.
Load More Replies... KariLovesHerKat 3 years ago
I find mundane tasks very relaxing. I enjoy the ironing and dishes. The more repetitive the better for me
GoddessOdd 3 years ago
I love cleaning, but not so much cooking. To me, cleaning is therapeutic and rewarding --cooking not so much.
Load More Replies... #11
Raven DeathShade 3 years ago
Loki, I'm a god they call me Loki. I'm the one they wanna see low-key, and I love to love me ;). (The Loki Song, by the Living Tombstone)
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Loki’s Lil Butter Knife 3 years ago
The bane of everyone who swims. I have emerged from the pool like some swamp thing with nasty hair tinged a rancid shade of yellowish green due to chlorine getting under my swim cap and though: Screw it, too busy. If my friends can take me looking like a swamp thing, they can't take me looking my best.
Loki Laufeyson 3 years ago
Hello, why are you my "Lil Butter Knife?" I have no complaints, I am just simply curious.
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Brian Bennett 3 years ago
to was hair or not to wash hair that is the question - once a month or when needed!
Research has also shown that sarcasm can be easily misinterpreted, especially when served electronically. In one study, 30 pairs of university students were given a list of statements to communicate, half of which were sarcastic and half of which were serious: some students communicated their messages via e-mail and others via voice recordings.
Participants who received the voice messages accurately gleaned the sarcasm (or lack thereof) 73 percent of the time, but those who received the statements via e-mail did so only 56 percent of the time, hardly better than chance. Additionally, the e-mailers had anticipated that 78 percent of participants would pick up on the sarcasm inherent in their sarcastic statements. That is, they badly overestimated their ability to communicate their tone.
At least sarcasm goes well with memes!
#12
DennyS (denzoren) 3 years ago
Those were the days. Spending all night reading...simpler times.
Layla Corman 3 years ago (edited)
Right?! Now I read 45 minutes past my bedtime (and drop the book on my face at least 4 times) and wake up like I only got 20 minutes of sleep.
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GoddessOdd 3 years ago
I love reading, and still spend a lot of time doing it, but I have noticed that in the age of the web, my attention span has dropped incredibly... read half of an article, move on, read several headlines, half an article, play a quick game, read a paragraph. I don't sit thru whole movies any more, because I can pause in the middle. Now, especially online, I skip any articles that I think are too long.
best turtle 3 years ago
the only thing school accomplished was making us depressed and turning our brain into mush
Tracy Wallick 3 years ago
You have the same brain but you don't have the same responsibilities
Aradia Sayner 3 years ago
Oh this one hit hard. I used to read between 2-3 books a week and then my narcolepsy decided to get much worse and now I can only read 2-3 pages before I fall asleep.
Brian Bennett 3 years ago
Retired still do it love it read 7 books last month! Always have one with me wherever I go!
Jessica N 3 years ago
Ditto, i get through a book every few days! Not retired, i read after supper after work.
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Crazy Meerkat Lady 3 years ago
I read it in my head as "My mum be like ooooh aaaah ha hoooo haaaa"
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MaggieWest 3 years ago
When Meatloaf died a couple weeks back they kept playing "I would do anything for love". Had to stay in the car to show my respect.
#14
WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago
According to my dietician the worst thing you can do is eat or drink on an empty stomach, at least that's what I understood when I read her list of do's and don'ts.
Thorfin Wolfsbane 3 years ago
I went on the vegetables and wine diet where I only eat vegetables and drink wine. So far I've lost my job, my house, and my family.
Brian Bennett 3 years ago
Losing weight doesn't seem to be working for me, so from now on I'm going to concentrate on getting taller!
Veronica Sjöberg 3 years ago
I got so much life back when I stopped dieting for good. It has been great for my mind AND body. I'm in much better shape now compared to when I was dieting and that just proves that the whole diet-culture is nothing but a scam.
#15
No Name 2 years ago
I can think of 3 possibilities: Isle of Skye, Orkney Islands, or Faroe Islands.
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Melissa Hammond 2 years ago
I wish I was that cow right now. Cow body or not. I wouldn't care that I had the body of a cow, if I really was a cow.
#16
Sergy Yeltsen 3 years ago
I hate the fact that I can only upvote this once. :(
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Luther von Wolfen 3 years ago
Every decade of my life has been better than the one before. A lot of it has to do with learning how to ignore stupid stuff. I'm 52 now and I dgaf about a lot.
Leo Domitrix 3 years ago
My mom told me, when I was in high school, 'these are not the best years of your life!" and I swear that is 1. true and 2. why I didn't give up.
Foxxy (The Original) 3 years ago (edited)
I don't know why, but I have a gut feeling that my best life will start in my 40s.
GoddessOdd 3 years ago
I think the best is yet to come. Now that I am old I have no worries about anything ... age can be very liberating.
Honey Slime 3 years ago
People that say that are idiots. They have no idea how your life will play out. You might be miserable through high school but find a happy place after.
#17
Brian Bennett 3 years ago
I refuse to leave my sanctuary for any reason except to shop for food!
Truth Monster 3 years ago
I looked at the pictures of this meme and went, "Wow, the Mr.Robot guy looks A LOT like Freddy Mercury. The resemblance is uncanny," Someone, please help. Send coffee. lol
Auntriarch 3 years ago
Um, I thought that, and followed it with, ooh and the chap behind him doesn't half look like Brian May. Coffee's on its way
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Fluffy_wolfy 36 3 years ago
Lucky you for only taking 3 weeks. my usual re-charge takes 2 months lol
Aristan Maranichi 2 years ago
*me crawling into the black hole of my bed after this* you might not see me for a few years...
#18
Seamus Crumley 2 years ago
Men know how to cure that in Ireland. We have Guinness and Jameson Irish whiskey. After two hours, we forget that we have work, a wife and children. It's great - we feel like we are single again.
#19
TrashPandaSociety 3 years ago (edited)
Yasss. Then you have to say "OCCUPIED" and the person opens the door anyway. Then it's the awkwardness.
Belle Miles 3 years ago
How about when you have a one piece bathing suit and your wet and shivering in the echo chamber stall of a city pool toilet. Yep. Memories. The struggle is real, people.
Teresa Spanics 3 years ago
That is why I don't have a one piece bathing suit.
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#20
Dave Hinckley 3 years ago (edited)
I sometimes wonder what happened to the people who asked me for directions
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Foxxy (The Original) 3 years ago
I am terrible with directions so I get nervous going to places I don't go to on a regular basis. Even with using Google maps.
Seanette Blaylock 3 years ago
I have a horrible sense of direction. Navigation apps are a Godsend.
Load More Replies... Brian Bennett 3 years ago
I have lived in this town for 70 years and I don't know the names of half the streets or how to get there. They tell me its called progress!
Tami 3 years ago
Plus everything changes so much! Where'd the Kmart go? Was there a street there before? Where's all the trees? Were there apartments there before? And why's everyone in such a damned hurry???! 😵
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M. A. McKnight 3 years ago
Sure. Turn right at the corner where the stop sign is missing and then left where there used to be a huge oak tree but there's only a stump left. If an old man is in the yard, tell him Mac says "Hey" and he'll mow your lawn this Saturday"...
Sofia Gonzalez 3 years ago
Or you use "landmarks" from the town and they have no clue what they're talking about
Sofie 3 years ago
Haha! 😂 I bet you and me live in the same part of the town then 😂
Load More Replies... El muerto 3 years ago
keep going straight forward until you can't see me anymore and ask from there
#21
Loretta 3 years ago
To be fair the last thing I need is someone being obsessed with me. I'd like to have a healthy relationship please.
Luther von Wolfen 3 years ago
I have a dog's name in a heart tattooed on my arm. She was a really good dog.
Foxxy (The Original) 3 years ago
Aww, I wanna get a tattoo one day with a few small bubbles and one bigger one with a paw print inside. Around the bubble would be the name Bubbles. She was an amazing dog and I miss her so much.
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Camilo Is best 3 years ago
What about anime charecters or Encanto charecters
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LONECOOLMAN 3 years ago
I LOST MY BEST FRIEND, GUNNER LAST YEAR ON JANUARY 23, I STILL CRY DAILY. LIKE I AM NOW... S**T! HE WAS MY BEST FRIEND. I LOST MY OTHER BEST FRIEND, MY CAT SOOT AS WELL. HE PASSED THE YEAR BEFORE. AND NOW I AM CRYING AGAIN.
Lynn Dougherty Quin 3 years ago
Losing a beloved pet can be devastating. Have you thought about going to your local shelter to adopt a dog or cat, or both?
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Dani Alexander 3 years ago
Does anyone else just take a good long nap whenever some minor complication in life occurs? Or jus me….
Mary Peace 3 years ago
Cat philosophy: There is no problem in life so complicated it cannot be solved by a nap.
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JoTheLizardBob 2 years ago
What book is that?I kind of want to read it,someone get me some blankets and hot chocolate
Meg Headrick 3 years ago
My mom says if overthinking were the Olympics I would be Michael Phelps
#23
Madison Feehan 3 years ago
POV: When your friend brings one of their other friends to lunch but you don't know the other friend so you just sit there awkwardly while they reminisce about something they did 4 years ago.
Julia Atkinson 3 years ago
When your humans are too busy watching funny dog videos on their phones to play with you
WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago
"Let's go to the park they said and have some quality time." One tree isn't a park, and this is definitely not quality time, Olivia and Tom...
Cassidy ChillRose 3 years ago
When the other two people at the table are looking at their phones, I think that dog is all you can be. (Provided you don't have one yourself. I know it's the case for me.)
Ramona Jackson 3 years ago
No one's paying attention to that poor doggo. Come along with me, sweet dog. I will pay attention to you every day, I promise.
#24
Ophelia Butz 3 years ago
I feel like someone might stay in an bad marriage simply because they think 'only two years left'
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tuzdayschild 3 years ago
This would turn into a big every 4 years fee you have to pay and little else.
La Kalypso 3 years ago
I would say every year, rather than four. That said, the "renewal of the contract" is not a new idea by any means. Here's another one: possibility to get married only if the money covering (possible) divorce is already set aside. Takes away the romance, but... marriage is a contract, let's not forget that part.
Meg Headrick 3 years ago
True but every year I feel like waiting in line at courthouse or mail would get really tedious. Like why not just be engaged forever save the hassle lol- I met a couple in their 70s together 40 years, 2 adult kids, etc., and they literally just stayed boyfriend and girlfriend! So cute
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Mewton’s Third Paw 3 years ago
People get married and say their vows and don’t actually mean it. Why bother then?
Mike Loux 3 years ago
The Celts had the right idea - https://www.libraryireland.com/Brehon-Laws/Marriage.php
Lejita 3 years ago
Nice! I was about to post about this. They had an impressive law system! (Sister Fidelma series, anyone?)
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Sandra Monahan 3 years ago
People should NEVER get married if they don't have a permanent commitment to their partner. When you get married it's forever, not until I get tired of you, or until I find someone better. DON'T GET MARRIED IF YOU CAN'T MAKE THAT COMMITMENT!
#25
Ragnhild Nilsen 3 years ago
And even after a whole year you can start the conversation just where you left it and be sure they understand your twisted mind
oddly_informed_raven 3 years ago
this literally happened to me, we stopped texting during the year of virtual school, ran into each other during orientation, she complimented my hair and made a dark joke
Load More Replies... Wondering Alice 3 years ago
Called really close friend I hadn't seen for about a year crying saying I really needed a friend. She hung up. Half hour later she is at front door in her PJ's she had hung up to jump straight in car, not even getting dressed. Felt blessed
Foxxy (The Original) 3 years ago
I do see my besties more often than that and we still don't have photos together. I've been friends with one of them for approx 20 years.
Nicola Roberts 3 years ago
I went to Disneyland Paris just before Christmas and took 5 pictures. Last weekend I went to IKEA and took 47. Enough said.
albernistuff 4sale 3 years ago
remember "friends help you move house, but good friends help you move bodies"
#26
Madison Feehan 3 years ago
I hope it's not a chili pepper cake, because you don't need the extra burn.
Luther von Wolfen 3 years ago
If you're going to make someone have a cake, this is the right way to do it.
#27
hope.XXVI_ 3 years ago
*one moment 6 years ago when i was a little too loud* well time to dig my own grave
Camilo Is best 3 years ago
Bruh, why does your bio describe my sister perfectly
Load More Replies... Layla Corman 3 years ago
Me when the waitress tells me to enjoy my meal and I respond, "You too".
#28
Justine 3 years ago
I used to be the first pic because I used to care what others though of me - and I suffered (we have harsh harsh winters). Now I am the second pic and couldn't be happier - not just because it's warm and cozy, but also because I freed myself of wanting others to like my looks.
Layla Corman 3 years ago
Upstate New Yorker here (the REAL Upstate!)- I've always been the kid from A Christmas Story who can't put his arms down. Never cared one bit. Welcome to the warm side friends!
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Loki’s Lil Butter Knife 3 years ago
I would rather look like Ralphie from "A Christmas Story" than freeze my a**e off in a tiny leather jacket and leggings.
Auntriarch 3 years ago (edited)
Those jackets are not called bumfreezers for nothing. I favour the Dr Zhivago look for cold weather
Tobias the Tiger 3 years ago
Last week, there was a winter storm in my area (and there's supposed to be another tomorrow, haha), and there were still people at my school wearing shorts. How?
Jasper Cool 3 years ago
People who can wear leggings in snowy weather floor me. My legs are perpetually cold.
Mewton’s Third Paw 3 years ago
I’m in between these two. Warm but not looking like I’m in a sleeping bag
EEP 3 years ago
All you need to still be fancy are thermal leggings, thermal socks, thermal undershirt, thermal body, a quality coat, wool hat and gloves 😎
Load More Replies... chaotic awesome 3 years ago
there’s always that one kid in school who wears a t shirt and shorts even on the cold days
#29
Susan Atkinson 3 years ago
Born into a poor family, father left mom, me and 5 siblings then married for love. Almost 65 and won't be reporting any time soon. As an aside, the hubs is a great provider and is successful but lost most of his retirement after 911 and then more in 2008. We're probably where we were 30 yrs ago.
Loki’s Lil Butter Knife 3 years ago
Hey, professional crayon sorter is a very respectable profession.
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Thomas Turnbull 3 years ago
Where would your money come from in kindergarten asking for a friend
#30
User# 6 3 years ago
So.... Am I the only one who just works his way through the clothes rack from front to back and then starts over again?
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GoddessOdd 3 years ago (edited)
I also tend to calculate drive time to impossibly perfect conditions...it will take 25 minutes, tops. Reality: it's pouring rain, there are huge events all over the city, traffic is horrendous and it's the peak of rush hour, and I need to go 20 miles to get there...
Jess Thompson 3 years ago
I can, but it ain’t pretty and there’s a chance of arrest for indecent exposure…
Bart, I am your Father 3 years ago
I always say that I will wear something new and different to show my true style and then somehow I find myself wearing the same hoodie and jeans I've worn all week.
Jessica Cifelli 3 years ago (edited)
Pro tip: pick out clothes to wear the night before. Lets me sleep up to 30 minutes extra.
Auntriarch 3 years ago
I have to do that, because my brain doesn't work well enough to select clothing in the morning
Load More Replies... Camilo Is best 3 years ago
One time i got dressed, brushed my hair, and put on makeup in 8 minutes
#31
Julia Atkinson 3 years ago (edited)
Ten minutes of relentless high-pitched yapping later, Mimi was released unharmed. A note reading "how the hell do you stand this?" was attached to her collar
#32
Stephanie IV 3 years ago
Not as bad as „I need to speak with you about something really important...TOMORROW“ !!
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Ezigma 3 years ago
Or when they say "I was going to talk to you about something, but nevermind, it's not important." B***H! Why tell me then! Now I want to know.
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Fidgets McGee 3 years ago
Can be for sure,. When I say this I want to make sure there is enough time, privacy and a prepared state of mind for the person I'm talking with. Mostly when I say its important folks want to talk right away but not always a good time that moment.
Load More Replies... Layla Corman 3 years ago
Yep. Then it's something like, "Don't let me forgot to sign the science fair permission slip".
Sky Render 3 years ago (edited)
At least specify good, bad, or neutral if you say something like that! I mean it's still gonna be stressful, but at least that's one variable taken care of...
matt fischer 3 years ago (edited)
I intentionally avoid opening work emails after hours to avoid this. I have had some emails from problem work associates after hours and I'm pretty sure the intent was to hope I would say something confrontational after a few beers. Definitely best to wait until the morning.
#33
𝙸'𝚖𝚊𝚗𝚘𝚘𝚋!(new account) 3 years ago
ah dang, we read it wrong the entire time! It was backwards. It's actually supposed to be: 2102. Shucks :\
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Chinmayee Kalghatgi 3 years ago
The modern world with all our current technology almost ended in 2012 when we missed a powerful solar storm by a small margin. If it did hit the earth then it would’ve distrupted powergrids and knock sattelites. Just to get a perspective on how strong the storm was look up “ The Carrington event”
Tami 3 years ago
That's one of the biggest threats we have. And the damage could take weeks or months to repair, so people could be without power and communications for that long.
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Truth Monster 3 years ago
The world DID end. We're just in a new one. This is where taking from other cultures gets the west in trouble. For the Maya, it was AN end, not THE end.
#34
Emmanuel Grey 3 years ago
Don't tall to me, I'm still trying to process the trauma of waking up
#35
Julia Atkinson 3 years ago (edited)
Cow: "Jessie, are you there? We can't see you, are you still in the stable? Jessie, if you can hear us neigh once for yes and twice for no" Pig: "Why don't we just use a damn ouija board?"
pansexual witch 3 years ago
awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww🥰❤
Christina Uhlir 3 years ago
....both will end up on your plate, Evil Hornet !!!!???
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Bettie-Jean Neal 3 years ago
If I got a FT call from either one of these fine folks, you can bet I'd answer the phone!
#36
Madison Feehan 3 years ago
Well yeah that's why its called "after work". I don't exist to the outside world after 8pm.
Lola 3 years ago
At least you make it until 8. That’s more than I can say.
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Tonya Wallace 3 years ago
After work? I don't want to see those MFs DURING work, let alone after.
Brian Bennett 3 years ago
Doesn't everyone no matter what time they get home put their Jammies on!
He-Matt & the MOTU 3 years ago
I'm doing this right now, except my jim-jams have sloths on them.
#37
Demi Zwaan 3 years ago
Yup, rich will do that to you. All the money in the world for surgery, injections, make-up and photoshop.
KM 3 years ago
I'm sure she also works out and has professional chefs cook her nutritious food. I'd just like her to try looking like this after working full-time job 9-5 and then cleaning her own toilet during the weekend.
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Cuppa tea? 3 years ago
I like the posts, where this actor trained 4 hours a day, had strict diet of vegetables and fruits. No s**t, that's his/her job, they got nothing else to do, not being at work 8 hours. Plus that diet is prepared for them and ready at hand.
Richard Newell 3 years ago
No, narcissism knows no humility. You would be surprised how some rich people live.
Load More Replies... Seamus Crumley 2 years ago
I'm a 50 year old man, and I have better boobs than J Lo in this picture. Not what I intended. I once had a six pack, but 25 years later, I have a barrel.
Felicia Dale 3 years ago
A good gene pool, money, time and dedication to health makes all the difference. And the personal trainer, cooks, etc. Then a good photographer plus a camera that loves you… If you have some of all of this then drugs, surgery and photoshop aren’t necessary. Of course you can still use it.
#38
M O'Connell 3 years ago
If you're under constant pressure someone in management has probably failed at doing their job.
RandomHumanBean 3 years ago
the one on the right is me right now worrying about the fact that i have a big 100 question math test in the morning and then a 40 point science test on the same day tomorrow and im gonna have like 2 minutes per question or less on the science test. (also im in MIDDLE SCHOOL)
Lydia Dean-Melchior 3 years ago
The first kitty with the sunglasses and cap reminds me of Tom Selleck.
Al Jameson 3 years ago
But can we talk about how much the pic on the left looks like Tom Selleck?
#39
Mistralok 3 years ago (edited)
I can relate to this. If I can't sleep well at night and get up before dawn, all I have to do is make breakfast and I'm back in bed in no time.
Ruth Harper 3 years ago
I'm fine with breakfast because usually I only eat a tiny amount and drink a ton of coffee. But after lunch I'm usually really sleepy for a couple of hours. Usually my least productive work hours.
Load More Replies... Tonya Wallace 3 years ago
In the US (among us Black folks) it's called "The Itis". Pronounced eye-tis. Has racist origins, but like all things, we took it from the racists and made it our own. JFU though.
MonicaChicagoGal 3 years ago
Yeah I get it 54 year old Black woman here I've had Itis many many times LOL 😆
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Brian Bennett 3 years ago
What do we learn from elephants, cows and buffalos -It's just impossible to reduce weight by eating grass, salads, and walking!
𝙸'𝚖𝚊𝚗𝚘𝚘𝚋!(new account) 3 years ago (edited)
always got room for pie! :D lol
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#40
DUN DUN (she/her) 3 years ago
Live their own life, take their own decisions
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ZAPanda 3 years ago (edited)
Freedom baby. 1. Read whatever you want to midnight if you like, without someone moaning at you to turn off the light. 2. Fight with republicans on Bored Panda without someone moaning at you to turn off the laptop. 3. Art! Do art! 4. Watch whatever you like without someone moaning at you to turn off the crap movie. 5. Listen to whatever you like without someone moaning at you to turn off the crap music. 6. Go to whatever restaurant you like to eat whatever you like without someone moaning at you to go to a healthy place and should you be eating that do you know how bad it is for you. 6. Volunteer for as many charity things as you have time for without someone saying you have so much time for strangers but no time for me.
Susie Elle 3 years ago
Love my boyfriend but sometimes, just every once in a while, I miss this :')
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Deborah B 3 years ago
Aro here. To paraphrase Oscar Wilde: "A pet provides you with company without depriving you of solitude."
VioletDelta 3 years ago
Same here. Planning on adopting a cat/cats as soon as my life stabilizes a little. Old cat lady is my goal.
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Katie Lutesinger 3 years ago
Spend all my money on myself, watch/listen to whatever the hell I want, hog the comfy chair, stay up all night playing video games without anyone complaining, snore without keeping anyone awake... the list goes on.
Emmanuel Grey 3 years ago
You forgot 'And watch your relationship burn with a bowl of popcorn and sunglasses'
Leesa DeAndrea 3 years ago
Eat what they like, wear what they like, watch what they like, set the thermostat where they like, do what they want to do.
#41
Emmanuel Grey 3 years ago
I think about this scene way more often than I should, and I don't mind 😌
Nicole Tomme 3 years ago
And the crow listening through the chimney giggles, giving away his position.
#42
Bettie-Jean Neal 3 years ago
Hmm. I'm 51, my mind is 15, my kidneys are dead, my knees and hips are about 85.
Cami Ereth 3 years ago
ILOVETHIS! (I'm 50-ish, my neck is 95, my back is 75, my shoulder is 110/dead, my knee is 70-ish). Just think-it only gets better! Woooo, me! This was fun!
Gabby M 3 years ago
Right Girl!! Pulls up a chair n pours wine for us both. My age % are pretty similar.
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Meg Headrick 3 years ago
Also "why does my neck hurt like what did I even do"
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#43
Mii 3 years ago
My boss offered me a mousepad when I cried because of the cancer diagnosis of my late grandpa. He tried to cheer me up at least...
Susanne B 3 years ago
I was glad to read you understood that he tried even though a bit akward
Load More Replies... Loki’s Lil Butter Knife 3 years ago
Sigh, my old roommates would always put the kettle on for a steaming mug of tea if one of us was sad. Man I miss those days. Now I sadly have to weep myself while downing cups of lukewarm coffee.
That nerd Zoe 3 years ago
My friend was having a mental breakdown (starting to) and I said "carbonated milk" and then suggested we glue acrylic nails to our toenails. It worked btw. I was 12, she was 11 (diagnosed with anxiety)
Aristan Maranichi 2 years ago
Sorry kid that's the best I got unless you want a few dusty lifesavers to go with that
Crazy Meerkat Lady 3 years ago
This looks like Cam from Modern Family if his life turned out differently and he didn't go to college
#44
Fat Harry 3 years ago
Was going to say the same thing. Men look universally ridiculous in skinny trousers.
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Jasper Cool 3 years ago
I've seen men in their 70's rock skinny jeans. Most outfits are how you put them together vs what age you are.
Aeon Flux 3 years ago
This is true, but it's also important to wear clothes that fit your body well.
Load More Replies... Martha Meyer 3 years ago
Yeah no, the difference is whether the man in those jeans is physically fit or not. I've seen plenty of overweight teenagers crammed into skinny jeans.
Kai David 3 years ago
Skinny jeans just need to go. No one. ABSOLUTELY no one looks good in skinny jeans ,
Martha Meyer 3 years ago
Lots of people look good in them imo. They need to go because they are uncomfortable.
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#45
Layla Corman 3 years ago
Long Island Iced Tea (from a bartender) 1/2oz Vodka, Gin, Rum, Tequila and Triple Sec. Fill glass with sour mix and shake. Top with no more than 1oz of Coke. Lemon garnish. 🍹Cheers.
#46
Mewton’s Third Paw 3 years ago
I say “Happy Monday” every day of the week, because I work every day of the week. It’s all just Mondays at this point
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WiTchY_WoMaN 3 years ago
January and February are, I think, actually the most depressing months...
Heather Steinbrink 3 years ago
Oof, I felt that this year. I need a holiday because I want to save my vacation days for good weather.
Martha Meyer 3 years ago
For me, the depression starts on the 1st of January. What's taking this person so long?
#47
J.L. Martin 3 years ago
Until today I did not realize that a cat could look coy. I am impressed.
#48
Katie Lutesinger 3 years ago
No way. I'm single and I am FAR too lazy to make such a nice dinner for myself.
June 3 years ago
Do you also occasionally eat from the pan or am I the next-level lazy?
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Buren 3 years ago
This is wrong, I wouldn't be bothered to cut my bread and fold my napkin nicely. Also, candles, bottle, and glass near the laptop? Rip laptop.
#49
Debbie Burton 3 years ago
Change the name of your toilet to Jim.... then you can honestly say you go to the gym every morning
Seamus Crumley 2 years ago
I know a few Gyms. Jim lives across the street, one from work, a brother Jim and also a cousin Jim. We are not concerned about this Gym nonsense, but we do some bicep exercises lifting Guinness in Jim's bar down the road.
#50
Brian Bennett 3 years ago
I'm not losing my memory. I'm just really good at letting go of my past!
Olga Dremina 3 years ago
When you're adult, you're expected to grow butterflies from caterpillars people give you. And with experience you learn to distinguish caterpillars from maggots.
#51
QibliOfTheSandWings 3 years ago
No problem at all, as I’d rather stay home cleaning. When something isn’t clean, it just bugs me
Load More Replies... WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago
If the wife is making more than the man you'd be foolish to refuse to be a stay at home dad. Don't care what friends say. "Sure Bob, you reluctantly go to the same shyte job every day while I stay at home and cook, clean and wash and have my first glass of wine at 10.30 AM."
#52
Julia Atkinson 3 years ago
When you realise that you're basically the "before" in painkiller ads
matt fischer 3 years ago
I was standing behind a guy at Chipotle the other day that looked like this and I thought about saying "don't slouch" to him, but I didn't like the cut of his jib, so I didn't intervene.
Memere 3 years ago
It's best that you never say this to anyone - they could have scoliosis, or another physical condition that causes the slouch. Or it could be caused by slouching over a phone or tablet or laptop all day or night. I say it to myself but never out loud.
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#53
Raven Sheridan 3 years ago
All I need is some plutonium, a De Lorean, a flux capacitor and enough road to reach 88 miles per hour, and I can do it!
#54
WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago
30 minute sauna, 10 minute cool down, 5 minute shower = 45 minutes.
ChickenNugget 3 years ago
I talk to myself, sit on the shower floor, confront my shampoo bottles...
𝙸'𝚖𝚊𝚗𝚘𝚘𝚋!(new account) 3 years ago (edited)
"confront my shampoo bottles..."🤣🤣 Legend!
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Memere 3 years ago
Or a head of thick, 36" long hair. That takes forever to rinse out!
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dang world 3 years ago
impromptu songwriting, imaginary conversations, pretending to know what I'm doing with my hair.....
#55
WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago
From my experience: when someone is too cheerful in the morning it's not going to be a good day.
SingingCatMom 2 years ago
Yeah....'cause I'll spend all day wanting to kill them.......
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Sofia Gonzalez 3 years ago (edited)
"What the fudge is wrong with you?! There is no reason to be happy in the mornings!"
Brian Bennett 3 years ago
I always mean what I say I may not always mean to say it out loud, but I always mean it!
KariLovesHerKat 3 years ago
My friend used to stay over a couple of times a month. She said i am annoying as f because I'm too cheery in the morning. In fairness I'm the same all day every day. She won't stay over anymore. She is very moody so i don't take it personally
#56
Julia Atkinson 3 years ago
Me: "Do these idiots never watch Forensic Files/know how hot a crematorium furnace has to be/understand that there are security cameras everywhere?"
Katie Lutesinger 3 years ago
Me: "Oh come on, at least PRETEND to be grieving instead of instantly going after the life insurance and then hitting the luxury yacht sale with the younger and more attractive new partner you suddenly have!"
M O'Connell 3 years ago
I always laughed at CSI and shows like that because they would have a 6-month backlog if they tried to process every stray hair or little poof of lint in my house
#57
Mewton’s Third Paw 3 years ago
You brought that up, not her. That’s like seeing a bald guy who says he can’t get a date and saying “hey I’m sure lots of women don’t care you’re bald!” You’re just saying what you really think. The girl who posted this probably just looks a bit like the cartoon.
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Brian Bennett 3 years ago
I don't want to adult today. I don't want to human today. To day I want to dog - I'll be lying on the floor in the sun, Please pet me and bring snacks!
#58
Kimi Tomminello 3 years ago
"You look different with facial hair." Same thing- of course you're going to look different with something else on your face that wasn't there before captain obvious.
Klas Klättermus 3 years ago
Of course he knew that. He just didn't want to say right out that he doesn't think she is pretty without it
Jess Thompson 3 years ago
What they mean is, “I’m dumb and judgemental with unrealistic beauty standards and don’t know how to address that without being a c**t so I’m going to sound like a moron instead.”
#59
WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago
You haven't even hit the age where 18 year olds start lecturing you on how to do your job, you have not suffered enough to deserve retirement.
Ivana 3 years ago
??? Is there an age that this happens? What 18 year olds do this? I am quite scared now.
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#60
#61
#62
Kanuli 3 years ago
I thought I was the only one 😂 Sometimes I predicted arguments that accurately I thought I could see the future😂 Which I can’t. 🙄
Pezor Zass 3 years ago
i have told someone in the middle of an argument "I don't have to listen to you anymore. we've had this exact argument in my head over and over for the past two months and i know everything you're going to say already"
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#63
Rhea.S🤍 3 years ago
Definitely...love yourself like you love them or better...even more👌🏽
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Raccoon Queen 3 years ago
Googled it, laziest way to write Happy birthday according to google
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Foxxy (The Original) 3 years ago (edited)
Thats really sad. My mind went elsewhere when I first started reading it. I thought it was gonna say "The love I give to other people vs the love I give myself".
Brian Bennett 3 years ago
I've passed the "old enough to know better" stage and have moved into who gives a damn stage!
#64
Rattus Norvegicus 3 years ago
i did that in the mid 2010s (i have no memory of the 2000s whatsoever) because my family was kind of cheap but this is relatable. but then the computer would just give me a fuzzy blue screen like it had enough of the poorly animated barbie movies i was watching.
#65
Carol Hume 3 years ago
7am if only. What a luxury. Small people in my house think that 5.20 is when we should all start the day and I hate it.
Terilee Bruyere 3 years ago
Small people in my house have to be ready for the bus at 5:45 and wake up at 4:15 XD
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Kate Jones 3 years ago
The problem isn't that I wake up, it's that every single work day I struggle with getting out of bed at 6am like it's torture. But on my days off, for no reason whatsoever, I'm wide-eyed and awake at 4am and can't go back to sleep. Then I get tired at like 3pm and end up doing nothing all day and night because I was up so early. Nothing is open so it's not like I can go out, and I don't want to wake everyone up so I can't get housework done. All I want in the world M-F is to go back to bed like I haven't slept in a year. I've literally been nauseous before having to get up, but on my days off? Nope. Why does this happen to us? I've even tried to trick myself by setting my alarm to wake myself early so that I can feel that feeling of gratefulness to go back to sleep but that doesn't work. Soooo annoying.
WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago
My body never woke me up naturally at 7AM. The alarm clock did. If the alarm doesn't go of, I'm sleeping to 2 PM.
#66
ZAPanda 3 years ago
Funny but unsurprisingly hotness doesn't always correlate with worth being in a relationship. I've found some attractive people - especially men - are very narcissistic and make everything about themselves, whereas less attractive people are often nicer people. So, it depends on what you want - a stamp on the fuselage or an actual relationship.
Mazer 3 years ago
Ugly people have been bullied, as a resort they have more empathy towards others Good looking people tend to glide through life knowing looks opens many more doors which can breed superiority complexes
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Not Proud British 3 years ago
This was fine until the last bit. Friends is everything. If you can laugh with someone, cry with them, get drunk with them, feel safe with them, pour your heart out with them. have fun with them - then they are a keeper. If you find someone with an attractive personality, then you gradually start to find their physical attributes attractive too. Love can be a slow burner and some friends are worth the wait.
Justine Queequag 3 years ago
Too time consuming, id rather bonk more people in half the time
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#67
#68
ChimeraBubbles 3 years ago
Hormonal birth control makes me swing wildly between rage and depression! So, no hormonal birth control for me. Would love to have a sterilisation operation but they won't give it to me because of previous abdominal surgery. Yay for condoms!
El muerto 3 years ago
the best form of birth control is being ugly and antisocial
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Ellen Klingers 3 years ago
I think it's a reference to depression being one of the side effects of the pill. So it's being stuck between a rock and a hard place, either depressed or having a baby you don't want.
Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago (edited)
Just jerk off, then... Or make him wear a condom. Don't let your guy be a lazy wimp.
Brian Bennett 3 years ago
Before they perfected the birth control pill it was called a baby maybe!
#69
Lara Verne 3 years ago
Bold of you to assume they would let you just sit there and do nothing.
#70
#71
#72
Me Oh My 3 years ago
As the wise people say, I'd rather cry in a Ferrarri than smile in a Ford.
Load More Replies... Brian Bennett 3 years ago
Money can't buy happiness but it's nicer to cry in a Mercedes than on a bicycle!
KatHat 3 years ago (edited)
Money CAN buy you happiness up to a certain point. The studies say $60,000 - $75,000 is enough to reduce most basic stresses, and $95,000 is enough for life satisfaction for most people (obviously there are exceptions for some specific circumstances). Above $95K, though, more money brings fewer emotional returns.
Bob Belcher 3 years ago (edited)
I'm close to that threshold and I call BS. Inflation creeps up, insure and taxes go up, and I mean property taxes, not income taxes. Cost of gas has gone up. I'd push that number closer to 150K.
Load More Replies... Layla Corman 3 years ago (edited)
I never understood why parents disliked Spongebob so much?!? He is a fantastic employee, a wonderful friend, he has a huge heart, he takes great care of his pet, he loves to learn and he's usually always happy. 🤔
Evil Hornet 3 years ago
My best memories are on one room with my GF and dog. So little space, so much comfort and love <3
#73
Unnamed Hooman 3 years ago
It normally ends up making 4 hours seem like 8
Load More Replies... #74
That nerd Zoe 3 years ago
Meh, my friend rarely wants to hang out and I'm an ambivert so I usually say yes. :)
#75
#76
not your average weirdo 3 years ago
Everyone in my family except me: Yay lets order pizza! Me (lactose intolerant): ;-;
DennyS (denzoren) 3 years ago
I'm making sure I remember this. I'm an only child so it's even more difficult for me. Lol
#77
TheLilacButterfly 3 years ago
*hides math test results behind back* don't worry, a C is still a good grade!
Artsy Bookworm 3 years ago
It's just so unfair that we get overly worked up over our grades. I used to be terrified on the day we got exam results. Felt like I'd let everyone down that I was worthless.
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3 years ago
Yes, of course, just because I made a mess of my life doesn't mean my friends are entitled to ruin their lives. That's simply how it worked between friends.
#78
BSteel13 3 years ago
Does she really have a phone case with her face all over it!? haha barffff
#79
InfectedVoice 3 years ago
"Oh this bit, listen to this bit coming uuuuuuuuuuuuuup now".
Load More Replies... Unnamed Hooman 3 years ago
“Oh you don’t like it? Oh um, yeah I actually hate it too. I used to like it”
#80
Julia Atkinson 3 years ago
"If I wear four pairs of socks there should be enough room for the sandwich toaster"
Otter 3 years ago
I keep a permanent overnight bag, with toiletries, makeup, chargers, extension cords, etc. So when I need to make a short trip, I just bung in a couple of clothes and go.
Freya the Wanderer 3 years ago
A very good idea! I keep certain items in my suitcase so I spend less time packing or worrying about what I have.
Load More Replies... Nonexistant Shoelace (they/he) 3 years ago
This is not me. Took a one night trip and all I packed is a shirt, jeans, two pairs of underwear and two pairs of socks. Why do people do this? In my opinion it's weird.
#81
Layla Corman 3 years ago
Friends and family: What do you want to do for your B-day? Me: Nothing! It is just another day. Don't make a big deal! Also me:
TrashPandaSociety 3 years ago
I never understood this concept of "I was born, congratulate me, give me a party and presents and attention". Yay, you are 1 in 7 billion people. Congrats. *eyeroll*
#82
#83
#84
Jasper Cool 3 years ago
Idk if it was having a kid or turning 40 but the water retention is crazy. I look like two different people from day to day depending on my liquid intake.
#86
Jaime Blackwater 3 years ago
Eh, sounds like a waste of time. Look for people who don't expect you to jump through hoops and do tricks.
Luther von Wolfen 3 years ago
Double spaced, 12 point, 1 inch margins. If it's anything other than Times New Roman, I'll trash it. Include citations, MLA.
KatHat 3 years ago
*who (I generally don't do that but comments about grammar and writing are fair game).
Load More Replies... Brian Bennett 3 years ago
Have you ever listened to someone for a while and wondered Who ties your shoes for you!
#87
Sofia Gonzalez 3 years ago
I think "my bff" looks a little trashy, no offense to y'all who think it looks good
albernistuff 4sale 3 years ago
Hetero male here; dress looks like either narcissist, snob, or super insecure and compensating. Prefer woman on right who dresses nice and cares, but chooses comfortable over "Look at me!"
Kallen Kneeland 3 years ago
The other two are wearing cold weather gear (long pants, coats) while Ms. Beauty&FashionFirst (that IS what BFF means, right?) is wearing not much more than the average bathing suit. Won't she freeze?
RedMarbles 3 years ago
If aliens tried to learn about us from watching news (or newstainment) shows, they'd surely get the impression women run hot and men run cold (among other things) since the men are always suited up in layers and the women often have bare arms and legs.
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Two_rolling_black_eyes 3 years ago
I'm the one in the back. Obsessed with my own comfort with no idea of where I'm headed.
#88
WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago
Some men: Hey there's a woman who is looking for a friend. Let's send her a photo of my penis.
Load More Replies... #89
WilvanderHeijden 3 years ago
It's not the falling that kills you. It's hitting the ground that does the trick.
Artsy Bookworm 3 years ago
Or if it's a heart attack, it would be the fall.
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#90
#91
Ryan Deschanel 3 years ago
They are either legally required to delete it or at least to not share it, depending on the state.
#92
ZAPanda 3 years ago
It's much easier as a guy. 2 pairs for the office (brown, black). 1 pair for going out to the shops (sneakers). 1 pair for the beach (flipflops). 1 pair for hiking. Done.
Bender Bending Rodríguez 3 years ago
A pair of black work oxfords, a pair of snow boots, a pair of sneakers and a pair of flip flops to wear in the house only. Will not replace till one completely falls apart. I have a pair of nice dress shoes that is reserved for only parties where I need to wear suits, it's almost 7 years old and still like new.
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Kanuli 3 years ago
I wear shoes, and stuff I like. Don’t give a s**t what others think and am happy (only about this small detail), that I wear what I want.
#93
Julia Atkinson 3 years ago
Your friends, knowing all too well that ugly crying and vomiting are just round the corner
Brian Bennett 3 years ago
Everyone has the right to be stupid but some people abuse the privilege!
#94
Paul O'Connor 3 years ago
It's not so much that he's being loyal to you as he is being respectful to her.
bipotternerd 3 years ago
I wish I could upvote this more. Y would someone downvote this?
Load More Replies... Jess Thompson 3 years ago
🙄 it just means that that person in particular sees hugs as cheating, it’s down to you what your boundaries are. Platonic hugs are super important 😔
#95
Raven Sheridan 3 years ago
This is where you embrace single life and begin your cat collection.
Damitria 3 years ago
I will take the cat collection. I expect THEM to be jerks.
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Brian Bennett 3 years ago
One of the best things about getting older: Knowing someone is an a*****e before they even speak!
Not Proud British 3 years ago
Nah. Date a friend. Don't look for a partner, just go out there, be social and have fun. Make friends. Getting to know someone as a friend is so much better. I hate all this pressure to have a boyfriend/girlfriend. Be happy with who you are, work on loving yourself, surround yourself with people who love you in return. You will find yourself a partner sooner or later, but don't rush into it. Be friends first.
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What do you think ?
Anton Swanepoel 3 years ago
I'm sat here trying to figure out if the person that put these together actually knows what sarcasm is.
Anton Swanepoel 3 years ago
I'm sat here trying to figure out if the person that put these together actually knows what sarcasm is.
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