This Poem From The Perspective Of A 2-Year-Old Will Help You Realize What Goes On In Toddlers’ Minds
Most of us, especially those who don’t have children of their own and can’t relate to the struggles of parenthood at all, get frustrated about the little ones throwing tantrums. Baby screaming loudly at the restaurant – awful; toddlers dropping face-down on the floor in the middle of the department store just because their exhausted momma refused to buy that colorful candy – dreadful; kids crying their lungs out the whole duration of a six-hour-long flight – the worst fear of both the parents and all the other passengers and crew. But do we ever stop ourselves to wonder what lies beneath all these tantrums? Is it really just kids being ungrateful and unthoughtful brats? Sure that sounds very harsh but let’s be honest here for a second, it really is what most people think in these kinds of situations.
But one mom wrote a poem so honest and heart-wrenching it just forces you to stop and think for a second, and really put yourself in the shoes of the little ones. After all, we are all just humans with our own ups and downs and so are the little ones. Dejah Roman found a very honest way to show that with a powerful poem that reveals how life is from a child’s point of view.
Blogger Mary Backstrom shared her heart-felt poem two years ago on her blog Mom Babble and it instantly went viral. The author, Dejah, wasn’t even aware of her success until Mary contacted her.
Scroll down to read the full poem!
Blogger Mary Backstrom posted this poem by Dejah Roman that perfectly explains life through toddler’s perspective
Dejah said the greatest inspiration for this piece was her own children but then added “However, I have also been an in-home child care provider for over 15 years specializing in the care of infants and toddlers under the age of 5 years. I guess you could say they were all my inspiration. I was also greatly inspired by a woman by the name of Maria Montessori, who spent decades researching and exploring the development of infants and toddlers. She speaks of giving children, “freedom within limits” and tells us that respect and kindness must be taught through modeling of the adult rather and forceful practices of shaming, controlling, and bribery.” Dejah also noted that “it is vital to take the time to learn about the nature of the child’s mental, emotional and social processing, […] since children are born individual human beings and deserve respect from day one. We need to stop comparing them to others and trust them to learn.”
A lot of people could relate to it
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If people would start to respect toddler, and even babies, including their decisions – however irrational they may seem –, parents and children would get along much better with only few meltdowns – and those are fine, as children also need to learn that some things in life *are* frustrating. And besides, teaching a children the "right" way to play with something is the worst things you can do.
By the way: do not read this as a point for lenient parenting. It is not. I mean respect in the literal way, which not implies to always let children get their demands. But we have to be consistent with them and give them the feeling that we understand that they are competent in many regards.
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There are also things that, if explained right, can get rid of bad behavior. My friends daughters constantly fought. The oldest one picked on the youngest one and the youngest was always sad and frustrated. I finally explained to the older one "Your role as a big sister is to learn how to do things and then teach her. You're going to get to drive first, date first, graduate first and go to college first." She says "She's always bugging me!!" I said, "Of course she is. You're her big sister. She wants to do what you do. She can only learn by hanging around you. I bet if you set some time aside to spend with her..share what you did that day and listen to her day..she'd eventually leave you alone because she knows she doesn't have to be there to find out..you'll tell her when you're ready." She thought about it, tried it and it worked. She asked me how I knew. I said "Because I'm a little sister too."
When we say terrible two's, we are not talking about the child being terrible. It is a tough time (Three's were rough also) for both parents and little ones. The meltdowns are going to happen, A lot of the time it is them being tired and cranky. Keep the boundaries ( do not give in to a tantrum) and try and difuse the situation before the melt down.
If people would start to respect toddler, and even babies, including their decisions – however irrational they may seem –, parents and children would get along much better with only few meltdowns – and those are fine, as children also need to learn that some things in life *are* frustrating. And besides, teaching a children the "right" way to play with something is the worst things you can do.
By the way: do not read this as a point for lenient parenting. It is not. I mean respect in the literal way, which not implies to always let children get their demands. But we have to be consistent with them and give them the feeling that we understand that they are competent in many regards.
Load More Replies... There are also things that, if explained right, can get rid of bad behavior. My friends daughters constantly fought. The oldest one picked on the youngest one and the youngest was always sad and frustrated. I finally explained to the older one "Your role as a big sister is to learn how to do things and then teach her. You're going to get to drive first, date first, graduate first and go to college first." She says "She's always bugging me!!" I said, "Of course she is. You're her big sister. She wants to do what you do. She can only learn by hanging around you. I bet if you set some time aside to spend with her..share what you did that day and listen to her day..she'd eventually leave you alone because she knows she doesn't have to be there to find out..you'll tell her when you're ready." She thought about it, tried it and it worked. She asked me how I knew. I said "Because I'm a little sister too."
When we say terrible two's, we are not talking about the child being terrible. It is a tough time (Three's were rough also) for both parents and little ones. The meltdowns are going to happen, A lot of the time it is them being tired and cranky. Keep the boundaries ( do not give in to a tantrum) and try and difuse the situation before the melt down.
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