“Am I A Jerk For Picking My Wife Up From The Airport 10 Minutes Late?”
Interview With Author
Air travel, even for experienced fliers can be grating and one no doubt feels a wave of relief when they disembark a plane and make their way home at the end of a trip. But as frequent fliers already know, airports tend to be a ways away from most people’s homes, so it’s pretty lucky to have a partner who can easily come pick you up.
But sometimes plans change, as was the case with one husband who found out a bit late that his wife was landing early. Instead of leaving immediately, he finished his video game and then departed to pick her up, in the process being ten minutes late. The internet was divided on who was in the wrong. We got in touch with aLostBattlefield to find out more.
It’s pretty annoying when someone is late for some previously agreed plans
Image credits: NomadSoul1 (not the actual photo)
A man wanted to know if he was a jerk for being 10 minutes late to pick up his wife from the airport
Image credits: Fausto Sandoval (not the actual photo)
Image credits: duallogic (not the actual photo)
Image credits: aLostBattlefield
People are generally not in a good mood after dealing with air travel
Bored Panda contacted aLostBattlefield and he was kind enough to provide some extra details. We wanted to hear his side and understand how he saw the internet’s reaction to the story. “Since making the post, I apologized to my wife the next night just to smooth things over. She was stuck at work late so I brought her dinner as an offering and everything went great from then on. She also took partial blame for “overreacting.” Many readers DID think I was the asshole lol. My take on it is likely controversial but I think it’s because many readers are probably not married nor are they in long-term relationships. They can’t imagine prioritizing themselves for even a second which imo is, ironically, somewhat toxic. I also think it’s easy for people to throw stones with the veil of anonymity but you know… glass houses and all that. How it made me feel: I was genuinely surprised by the feedback. In the beginning, people had me questioning myself. I ended up getting a lot of messages from people in support though talking about how the sub is crazy, if I would have swapped the genders things would have been different, etc. Who knows if that’s true?”
This tale divided the internet in many ways. Some thought 10 minutes is not bad at all, perhaps even within the margin of error when driving to a busy airport. Some airports are notoriously bad when arriving by car, and people have ended up stuck in traffic for even longer. Others thought the husband was in the wrong, for not checking his phone, and for being unaware of flight tracking, despite, apparently, his wife traveling regularly and for deciding that one more game was necessary before he left the house. After all, it could have been blind luck that he was only 10 minutes late, it could have been a lot worse and his argument would have fallen apart accordingly.
So let’s take it from the top. The wife has been flying, itself a relatively unfun situation. You have to get to an airport, press through a mass of people, go through check-in and security, find a gate then wait to board. Then you are sealed in a metal tube that is somewhat cold and loud, full of other people, where you sit uncomfortably, for a few hours. The sum of all of these factors is that passengers tend to be tense, irritable, and stressed. This isn’t an excuse for bad behavior, but at the same time, we do need to be sympathetic to the experience of someone who has just traveled. By some miracle, she landed early, but this would basically still guarantee her husband would be late by some margin. Even had he gotten the news on time, he would need to leave, drive through traffic, and the rest. Flight tracking is all well and good, but you can’t expect a person to be glued to a phone or computer screen for hours, trying to figure out if it’s going to arrive early.
Relationships need good, clear communication and compromise to last
Where the husband truly messed up was in his response to his wife. In all seriousness, this was not a big deal from either side, he was a little late, and she was a little demanding. Not a hill to die on. Instead, he chose to be condescending to a person who had just been stuck on a plane for hours, lecturing her on how lucky she was that he stopped playing video games to pick her up. No one likes to have their free time curtailed, but part of being married is making time for the other person, even if that involves driving somewhere. He also chose to keep playing instead of leaving immediately. It’s never fun to have some plan interrupted, but realistically, her waiting after flying is less comfortable than missing 10 minutes of a video game.
All in all, this is a case where both sides could have communicated better. Similarly, not knowing about flight tracking, a technology multiple decades old now, is just silly in this day and age. However, OP was lucky it was just 10 minutes, but that really isn’t that long in the grand scheme of things. Her choosing to fight over it was also a pretty bad decision. Hopefully, both parties can learn from the experience and do better.
A few readers needed more information about the whole story
Others thought he was not a jerk, as it wasn’t that long to wait
Some, however, did think he was to blame for ignoring her messages
A select few thought everyone could have handled the situation better
Definitely. If that’s his normal attitude it’s probably not the incident itself that’s got his wife upset but the repeated disappointment. Like so many of these AITA situations, they both might want to rethink the relationship.
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Did anyone else notice that OP keeps harping on that he was ‘10 mins’ late when he was almost an hour late? Wife landed at 8:05 but was expected at 8:50. Arrived 9:05…I dunno, maybe my partner and I are just used to flying, but I always have my phone near me just in case it’s early or delayed - it’s the consideration. Tail and head winds happen. It’s always been that way, in the old days we’d call the airport hotline and dial in the flight number to get an update. Ah I dunno, dudes attitude sucks. Not an AH for finishing his game, an AH for general attitude. But different strokes I guess, the comment section seemed to include enough people that sympathised…
"should I drop everything and run?" dude, flights get delayed or arrive early. in a massive airport, with traffic. and even told that she already arrived, he kept gaming as if nothing. I mean, I'm a gamer... yet, there are priorities. and any person that arrives from a flight, exhausted, hoping to see you, wishes you are there b4 they pass the gate. I traveled for 25h to see my brother. in Frankfurt it's always a mess. that time I made it fast as never before. I call my brother, no reply. I call sis in law, she told me he was delayed bc work, he will be there in 1h+. brother calls me back and gives tips of what to do and where to spend the inevitable time I have to spend, bc he was WORKING! yes, things happen, and it's what you do to try to fix it or give a hand what matter most. in another of my trips, he was there at the gate, with my 2 nephews, who ran to hug me. yes. that tiny details wash off the exhaustion from a long flight in seconds.
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Definitely. If that’s his normal attitude it’s probably not the incident itself that’s got his wife upset but the repeated disappointment. Like so many of these AITA situations, they both might want to rethink the relationship.
Load More Replies... Did anyone else notice that OP keeps harping on that he was ‘10 mins’ late when he was almost an hour late? Wife landed at 8:05 but was expected at 8:50. Arrived 9:05…I dunno, maybe my partner and I are just used to flying, but I always have my phone near me just in case it’s early or delayed - it’s the consideration. Tail and head winds happen. It’s always been that way, in the old days we’d call the airport hotline and dial in the flight number to get an update. Ah I dunno, dudes attitude sucks. Not an AH for finishing his game, an AH for general attitude. But different strokes I guess, the comment section seemed to include enough people that sympathised…
"should I drop everything and run?" dude, flights get delayed or arrive early. in a massive airport, with traffic. and even told that she already arrived, he kept gaming as if nothing. I mean, I'm a gamer... yet, there are priorities. and any person that arrives from a flight, exhausted, hoping to see you, wishes you are there b4 they pass the gate. I traveled for 25h to see my brother. in Frankfurt it's always a mess. that time I made it fast as never before. I call my brother, no reply. I call sis in law, she told me he was delayed bc work, he will be there in 1h+. brother calls me back and gives tips of what to do and where to spend the inevitable time I have to spend, bc he was WORKING! yes, things happen, and it's what you do to try to fix it or give a hand what matter most. in another of my trips, he was there at the gate, with my 2 nephews, who ran to hug me. yes. that tiny details wash off the exhaustion from a long flight in seconds.
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