Some secrets are bigger than others. No matter how open and honest we might think we are, there are still some things that we prefer to keep to ourselves. After all, people are social beings, and our reputations, as well as being accepted, are vital. Naturally, wanting to fit in, we keep some information about ourselves to ourselves.
Inspired by user u/BoredHypnotist, the anonymous members of the r/AskReddit community revealed the most ‘socially unacceptable’ facts about themselves. These are things that anyone would have a hard time mentioning in public. Scroll down to see what kinds of secrets some folks have. It’s also a reminder for all of us to learn to be less judgmental and kinder to each other.
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I am a woman who is willingly sterilized.
Why do people think this is socially unacceptable? It's a very logical course of action if you know you don't want to have any (any more) children, or being pregnant/giving birth would damage your health etc. It's not the sort of thing a person can do without thought and consideration.
I don’t take care of my hygiene as much as I should. Especially when it comes to showering and brushing my teeth. It’s not that I don’t care, but depression makes it hard as hell sometimes.
Hang in there. Hoping you can get some therapy to help you feel better.
Judging others is never going to go away. It’s something that human beings do on both conscious and automatic levels. Analyzing the behavior of the people around us is a way to recognize how we ourselves (do not) fit into our social groups. Used sparingly to make us look at our values and actions more objectively, social judgments can push us to make more positive decisions that end up being good for us and our social group.
However, there’s a darker side to making these social judgments. Some folks judge other people to feel better about themselves, hide their own flaws, or fit into society at the cost of someone else’s reputation. This sort of exclusionary behavior might make you feel safer yourself, but it can also end up destroying relationships and ostracizing individuals.
I’m a 38 year old man who sleeps with stuffed animals.
I don’t like talking. It’s not that I’m afraid to talk, I just prefer to stay quiet most of the time. Unfortunately, we live in a world that requires you to talk a lot if you want to make connections.
I'm very very happy to get home after work and stay in bed for the rest of the day, most days of the week.
Even though we have free will, it would be naive to think that we have control over everything that happens to us. Sure, taking responsibility for our actions can empower us. That being said, there are so many things outside our control that we can’t really do anything about. It’s important to be honest with ourselves about what we can realistically affect with our actions.
For one, we cannot determine the circumstances of our birth, how we were raised, and what our genetics are. However, many people are judgmental of folks born into broken homes or who have a predisposition to mental health issues. Criticizing someone for their family‘s choices, upbringing, or genetic quirks is unfair. However, someone who’s doing their best to improve their circumstances and fight back against the problems they’ve been handed by (bad) luck is worthy of praise.
I ignore texts and calls. It starts with "I'll respond later" and then after awhile I feel like it's been too long to reply so I don't. It's not malicious but I assume it feels that way to others.
I have Tourette's, including coprolalia/swearing tics. I'm very lucky though, because I seem to fit in pretty well in restaurant kitchens, and I love that line of work 😄.
I had a baby at 17, got pregnant again a few years later, and could not afford another child. My sibling, who could not have children, adopted my baby.
As long as you, your sibling and the kids are happy now, I see no problem whatsoever
Things like attitudes and opinions are within our power to change, however, we might feel uncomfortable doing so just to fit in with the rest of our social group. It would feel like we’re betraying our deepest values if we did so. At the same time, having completely different beliefs than the majority of your social circle can make life very difficult. This might be why some folks choose to hide their true feelings—they don’t want to face rejection or take part in countless arguments.
What kind of behavior is deemed socially (un)acceptable is going to depend entirely on your culture and social circle. Something celebrated in your hometown might be seen as bizarre in a big city or even downright ‘shameful’ in another country.
I have no friends and am comfortable being alone. Prepared to die that way too :D.
I have no idea how to manage friendships.
I have friends and I'm friendly....
But sometimes I forget to text back and if they don't call or re text I could go months with no contact.
Unless I find something funny to share then I'm sending it to everyone.
I like candy corn.
I have been known to eat circus peanuts, you know the marshmallow confection that comes pre-stale in a bag.
Social norms change over time, too. Behaviors that seem odd to us now might have been perfectly fine decades or even centuries ago. On the flip side, what was once judged in the past might be mundanely accepted in this day and age. Social norms aren’t static. While we can guess what might be deemed acceptable in the future, we can never be certain—cultures can change in very unpredictable ways.
If you feel like opening up anonymously, why not share the most socially unacceptable facts about yourselves, dear Pandas? What do you think we can all do to be less judgmental and more accepting of other people? Has anyone revealed a secret about themselves that fundamentally changed how you looked at them? Tell us all about it in the comments.
That I come off as “cold” when I’m not masking
But man….sometimes I really am tired of masking. My reactions feel so fake to me and I can’t stand it. But everyone else seems to love it so…whatever ig.
I'm a girl and I grow out my leg hair due to being harassed by an 80 year old man who said I had "pretty legs" when I was 11, so I guess I decided that just never going to happen again.
I used to practice facial expressions as a child because i was always told i was robotic and expressionless(by my parents, no less) and studied how the popular kids at school acted so i could make friends. i think i’m autistic but i’m scared sometimes that people would just assume i’m a psychopath.
my parents told me i am expressionless more like cold because i hardly smile, i've had lectures from my parents, relatives, heck even a teacher once. My friends even told me that they taught i would be a bully when we first met. i consider smiling for no reason a chore, especially when i have to do it because i'm forced, but i can't help it
I would deliberately pretend that i don’t hear people calling me or asking me stuff in social situations. Also in a crowd when people are chitchatting in a circle, i zone out if im not interested.
I'm just like you, You're just like me...it's something anyone can see
Being borderline sociopathic for a profession
I've become "jaded" to seeing death, the mentally perturbed, physically traumatic injuries that you would only see in movies, even the downright depressing scenes, the list goes on.
The type of things people should only have to witness behind their screens or even only once in there life; I've adjusted to seeing in person on a weekly basis. It's to the point I can't call myself normal as I end up laughing to the most f****d up jokes.
Call it dark humor or a "coping mechanism" but if the event just happened, normal people would be mortified.
Its a bittersweet profession as a paramedic with high call volumes. I get a peek into everyones emergencies when they're at their lowest and often times these calls rub off on us (even the bs calls), but at the end of the day when s**t hits the fan, It's their emergency and not ours.
Better yet we have a hand in helping them physically and mentally. I have to tell people their loved ones are gone, but I get to convey it in the best way to let them heal the fastest. I have people who try to commit s*****e, but I get to save them when they or a loved one makes the call. I have people living the s**ttiest day of their life, but knowing it would've been their last if I hadn't came, makes it worthwhile.
I’ll leave. I’ll just go home and love it.
My parents are cousins. Nobody (outside the family) knows.
No adverse effect on the kids (although I AM on Reddit a lot…).
I was one of the last kids to have ever been a patient in an insane asylum here in the US. The one I was in closed down in 1993.
I'm fat.
I hate working but that doesn’t mean i’m lazy. I live my life by doing a bunch of side huddles and love it. I make about $10k/year but I have everything i need: food, shelter, and a wonderful community. I “work” about two months a year but otherwise i lay on the beach with a joint in my hand and a cat on my lap.
I'm autistic, and nine times out of ten i forgot that when people ask me for my opinion or input on something that they actually want the opinion that caters to theirs.
I have taken human lives. Sure, during military service, but just the same.
I did a combat tour, and never once fired my weapon in anger. I am much more glad of that now than I was then.
I stare blankly a lot during conversations. Like as if I'm zoned out, but I'm paying full attention. Especially if it's a particularly long conversation, I just can't be bothered to keep up with constant eye contact.
Same, except eye contact, i can't keep eye contact to save my life even with close people
I was in a mental health hospital and I still have regular emotional breakdowns.
I hope you have access to help and support when you need it. ((virtual hugs))
I always have a b***h face but the second someone smiles at me, my whole minute was made.
dude my default facial expression is a cold face, and even my happy or angry or annoyed reactions are minimal, people who are close to me are the ones who actually notice, but i still smile a lot though
I am a people pleaser and have learned how to chameleon into almost any social situation. I don’t know who I am so my dating life is: becoming acceptable and try to be the perfect person to my partner so they fall in love with me, then I break and say this isn’t working for me, leaving them in ruins. I hate myself for it but I don’t know how to connect otherwise.
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I'm part of an occasional throuple. We spend a couple of weekends a month together as well as occasional nights and we go on holiday together. Apart from that we have our own separate lives and relationships. It has worked perfectly well for the last 10 years.
As long as the relationships outside the throuple are aware and don't mind, nothing wrong with it
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A lot of these posts are things that a very large amount of people do/say/think/feel, but just don't talk about. I'll chime in with mine cause why not. I downvote every political comments I see if it's on a non-politically centered article, regardless if what is said is stuff I agree or disagree with. It's unnecessary to make a politically driven comment on an article that isn't centered around such topics.
One socially unacceptable thing in the hispanic community is cutting toxic family out of your life. Family means everything in the hispanic culture/community. Cutting toxic family out of your life is sometimes necessary for your own mental health but people still look down on you for not putting up with it cause they are family you know.
I'm part of an occasional throuple. We spend a couple of weekends a month together as well as occasional nights and we go on holiday together. Apart from that we have our own separate lives and relationships. It has worked perfectly well for the last 10 years.
As long as the relationships outside the throuple are aware and don't mind, nothing wrong with it
Load More Replies... A lot of these posts are things that a very large amount of people do/say/think/feel, but just don't talk about. I'll chime in with mine cause why not. I downvote every political comments I see if it's on a non-politically centered article, regardless if what is said is stuff I agree or disagree with. It's unnecessary to make a politically driven comment on an article that isn't centered around such topics.
One socially unacceptable thing in the hispanic community is cutting toxic family out of your life. Family means everything in the hispanic culture/community. Cutting toxic family out of your life is sometimes necessary for your own mental health but people still look down on you for not putting up with it cause they are family you know.
