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Life as a nurse, doctor or any other healthcare professional can be incredibly rewarding and unbelievably difficult at the same time. There are many pros, but the list of cons can sometimes seem to be equally as long (if not longer), especially after a hard day of helping patients, not all of whom are the brightest of the bunch.

A British nurse, who goes by the nickname GoddessBadger on Imgur, shared her work stories about the most oblivious, impolite, and downright bizarre patients she’s ever had to deal with. Upvote the stories you enjoyed the most, share them with your amigos, and keep on scrolling. While we’re on the subject of nurses, be sure to check out our post about the best and funniest nurse memes — they’re sure to get a chuckle or two out of you.

#1

Nurse-Shares-Insane

"We, of course, explain to her that cola is not an appropriate food to be giving to her child."

GoddessBadger Report

Radek Suski
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

People should seek official permission for having a baby

SBW71
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Need a license for everything else, having a baby should be top of the list

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Foxxy
Community Member
6 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What the actual f**k? I don’t understand how a parent doesn’t know that babies either need breastmilk or formula.

Karen Klinck
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

But she had the cola on hand Breastfeeding 'ruins your figure'. (Don't worry, I don't understand that one either.)

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Jo Choto
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

How can someone go through an entire pregnancy and never find out how to feed a baby?

Karen Klinck
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ask the mothers who hit up the welfare department for disposable diapers.

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Vicky Zar
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Poor baby. I hope it had no lasting health problems from all that caffeine and the Mom did learn her lesson.

Vicky Zar
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Thinking about this... how did the baby survive a) without formula/ breastmilk and b) with caffein instead?

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A B C
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Could we please establish needing a license to make babies?

Martha Meyer
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Better, having to take a child raising course once they are pregnant. Otherwise baby will not be handed over after birth.

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Isle_of_stressed_pilots
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I really hope that child was taken from the mother

Jolijn Njamin-Geurts van Kessel
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Please tell me this baby was taken away from the parents and brought to a safe home?

Nia Loves Art
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Mom sounds stupid more than malicious. They should try parenting classes and monitoring before taking the kid away.

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John L
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Sad part is some people truly do not know any better...

William Teach
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Um, this isn't a particularly funny story

Karen Klinck
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

But it's very true. And it said they weren't all funny--just notable.

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Vicky Zar
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I would say that too. But is it really in the eyes of the law if the parent did not know better? Although how anyone can think that Cola is appropriate for a baby is beyond me.

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Sinkvenice
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This is precisely the reason people need to take tests before being allowed to procreate.

Laana
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Draft in the head instead of a brain.

Seabeast
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This isn't funny, this is terrifying. I hope CPS was called.

Christy Smith
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

This makes me think she's very young, and obviously very stupid, with a side of pool size ignorance.

Sue Prewitt
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I would think that would be child abuse and take that baby

deanna woods
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Are some parents really this stupid that they it is okay to give cola to a baby? That would be like letting your baby drink a Monster.

Karen Klinck
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

They give them hard liquor 'to help with teething'. They give them beer 'because'. They give them marshmallows when they're older 'because that's what they eat.' I had a friend who worked CSP; you wouldn't BELIEVE the stories I heard! I worked for welfare for 33 years. I heard more.

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Jeffrey Teston
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

The title of this article said "Funniest" not "Most F'd up"..

René Kok
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Basic healthcare would fix this.

Joyce Berman
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That sounds like child abuse to me. ???

Brenda Swann
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I fear people, meaning this young girls parents, should be more involved. How is it a female can Become impregnated, go thru pregnancy, bare a child, and not one adult with half a brain be by her side and teach her. IT TAKES A VILLAGE TO RAISE A CHILD when that child does not have an adult to raise her.

Karen Klinck
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

We're too far into the 'don't ruin their lives' culture. And with the anti-life-all-women-should-have-that-baby-no-matter-what people trying to make stupid laws, this is what we get!

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Flavia Slag
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

As a nurse I really hope this hospital got counseling for this woman on how to care for a baby.

Cécile V.
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

In the old days, hope that it is over, babies were given cider with their milk to put them to sleep. Or beer. Normandy in France for example. Elsewhere? I am sure.

Jody Arnold
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If any mother is that stupid then I find it hard to beleive that she is capable of properly caring for her child at all, I mean really......feeding her baby coke.

Karen Klinck
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

And think where her priorities lie. She had Cake for herself, but didn't buy milk for her baby. People!

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Stannous Flouride
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah, that's what Mountain Dew is for!

mbrhapsody
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

A few years ago I taught a parenting class and informed a mother who was feeding her baby cola from a baby bottle that she shouldn't do that. She insisted "But he LIKES it!"

Karen Klinck
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"But it's all he'll drink." It's amazing the stories people will tell you.

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RME
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

JFC, this one isn't funny, it's horribly sad. That poor baby.

Alex K
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

jesus f****n christ how r******d can someone be

Karen Klinck
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Oh, yeah. How about: the only reason I send her to school is that the law makes me do it. She doesn't need to; she can stay on welfare." ?

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Non-New-Toni-An
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

giving a baby a taste for caffeine is really c**p, apart from the obvious health risks, you are setting her/him up for addiction,

Remliel
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Some people seem to inly have children so they can have someone to s**t over 24/7.

suzanne van Doorn
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

How is this supposed to be funny? This is child neglect and could have killed the baby...!

Blue Cicada
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

When I lived in a small town in central Ohio, many people told me that I should put Mountain Dew my babies bottle, to calm her down when she's fussy. Thankfully, I did not take this advice.

Katinka Min
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What part of the world is this where people do not have some kind of class or parent advice???

Karen Klinck
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Modern day America. "You can't tell me what to do."

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Suzanne Dunne
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Should be exams before parenthood

meow point1
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wait until they're, like, six, and even then only give them a sip occasionally, *not* as the only thing they drink!

Karen Klinck
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I didn't even know that stuff *existed* until I was ten!

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Jesper Rasmussen
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

If it doesn’t say on the bottle not to feed it to an infant, the mother can sue the heck out of the cola people. (In the USA - here in Europe we believe in using the brain).

Koala King
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

That’s why my sister is so hyper and brain dead

Valerie Lessard
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

"mom"? this is a british nurse right?

Karen Klinck
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Contraceptives should be mandatory at 5, and people (of both sexes!) should have to a) take classes and b) pass a mandatory intelligence and practicality test before being allowed to have a baby.

Ryo Bakura
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Wait, Coca-Cola, Pepsi, or some other brand? Because only one is acceptable to drink. Not by babies, but you know what I mean. Also, the correct answer is Coca-Cola.

MikeyG
Community Member
6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Surely everyone knows you shouldn't feed a baby Coca Cola?! Pepsi is much better!

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RELATED:
    #2

    Nurse-Shares-Insane

    GoddessBadger Report

    Norman van Druten
    Community Member
    6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    "Carry on with your c**p and you will be booked in for an autopsy!!"

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    #3

    Nurse-Shares-Insane

    "Truly amazing how much this gets thrown at us NHS nurses when somebody can’t get their own way... Do they not realise that we pay taxes too?"

    GoddessBadger Report

    GoddessBadger’s work stories were a booming success on Imgur. It even made the front page! Her meme collection got 4,930 upvotes and was viewed over 150,220 times at the time of writing. But these numbers keep on getting bigger and bigger, as the stories go even more viral.

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    The emergency room nurse from England detailed just how weird her shifts can get: from one patient refusing suppositories because they’re ‘not gay’ to a mother giving her baby fizzy drinks instead of formula. [Groans internally]

    It takes the patience of a saint to get through to people who are as oblivious as this. So we’re probably all grateful that there are so many healthcare professionals out there who are patient enough to excuse our mistakes.

    #4

    Nurse-Shares-Insane

    "She was at LEAST 80 years old"

    GoddessBadger Report

    Serbob
    Community Member
    6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    My (now passed) 90 year old grandmother said she didn't want to date anyone in her retirement home because they were all too old for her and she didn't have the energy to lift her butt in the air anymore. She had 8 children and said that every time she took her pants off she got pregnant. I hope I'm as spunky when I'm 90.

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    #5

    Nurse-Shares-Insane

    GoddessBadger Report

    Restless
    Community Member
    6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh dear....that misunderstanding can get them into jail, never mind ER

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    #6

    Nurse-Shares-Insane

    GoddessBadger Report

    Restless
    Community Member
    6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Seduced, sedated.....i will go for either/or lol

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    Speaking of patience with patients (pun intended), Jacksonville University has some great advice on how to deal with incredibly inconvenient individuals. The most important thing for a healthcare professional is to remain calm and maintain control.

    Furthermore, it’s vitally important that nurses, doctors, and other hospital staff be as empathetic as they can. If a patient is angry or upset, they might simply want to complain a tad, so try talking to them, show them that you understand their pain and that you’re on their side. We’re all human beings and we all want to be heard.

    #7

    Nurse-Shares-Insane

    "Racism is surprisingly common. I am British but not white so I face a lot of these comments. Sometimes I can be on an entire shift without a white British staff member...

    If you’re a racist, I have one thing to say to you... 'Grow the f**k up.'"

    GoddessBadger Report

    Foxxy
    Community Member
    6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I understand asking for someone who is more fluent in your language due to misunderstandings and language barriers but definitely not because of race. That’s just ignorant. My regular GP is an Indian and there are rare occasions where he says something that I need him to repeat and he is happy to do so. He is one of the best GP’s I have come across in a very long time.

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    #8

    Nurse-Shares-Insane

    "We end up giving them an IV instead since they were adamant they didn’t want a suppository."

    GoddessBadger Report

    A B C
    Community Member
    6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    It's funny (and a little sad at the same time) how many men still believe that anything touching their a**s means being gay.

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    #9

    Nurse-Shares-Insane

    "After much deliberation and a look through their medical records, we realised they meant “Sickle Cell” as in anemia."

    GoddessBadger Report

    Arguing with patients is also never the answer because it doesn’t lead to anything other than more arguments: it’s far better to be respectful; the ER is not the place for a screaming match over whose opinion is correct. That being said, you have to set concrete limits on how a patient can treat you. If a person is being disrespectful, say that this is the wrong way to treat you and walk away. At the end of the day, if you’re feeling exhausted and emotionally sapped, just remember, that you’re doing this job for a reason and that the temporary inconvenience is worth it in the long run.

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    #10

    Nurse-Shares-Insane

    "This was truly one of the most bizarre excuses I’ve ever heard for a dildo stuck up the butt. This patient insisted that he was minding his own business, running as he normally does in the morning when a dildo wielding assailant appeared and started chasing after him. He claimed he tripped and that’s when our mysterious dildo man inserted the toy... Did we believe him... No... and they never caught the dildo wielding man."

    GoddessBadger Report

    Dr.Scott
    Community Member
    6 years ago (edited) Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    While you're making jokes we have a dildo wielder running around unabated.

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    #11

    Nurse-Shares-Insane

    "These types end up in the ED often and often they just need to go home and sleep it off. Discharge is often queried with “How am I supposed to get home?!” Why is that my problem? The Ambulance Service is not your personal taxi service."

    GoddessBadger Report

    tuzdayschild
    Community Member
    6 years ago Created by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Well, if you sit awhile over there in that waiting room, you can take yourself home in the morning.

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