Get Premium
Dark mode theme is available exclusively for premium users. Learn more about the benefits of subscribing.
No fees, cancel anytime.
Dark Mode 
No fees, cancel anytime 
11 Of The Funniest And Most Absurd Patient Stories Shared By This Nurse
Life as a nurse, doctor or any other healthcare professional can be incredibly rewarding and unbelievably difficult at the same time. There are many pros, but the list of cons can sometimes seem to be equally as long (if not longer), especially after a hard day of helping patients, not all of whom are the brightest of the bunch.
A British nurse, who goes by the nickname GoddessBadger on Imgur, shared her work stories about the most oblivious, impolite, and downright bizarre patients she’s ever had to deal with. Upvote the stories you enjoyed the most, share them with your amigos, and keep on scrolling. While we’re on the subject of nurses, be sure to check out our post about the best and funniest nurse memes — they’re sure to get a chuckle or two out of you.
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
"We, of course, explain to her that cola is not an appropriate food to be giving to her child."
RELATED:
#2
Norman van Druten 7 years ago
"Carry on with your c**p and you will be booked in for an autopsy!!"
#3
"Truly amazing how much this gets thrown at us NHS nurses when somebody can’t get their own way... Do they not realise that we pay taxes too?"
#4
"She was at LEAST 80 years old"
Serbob 7 years ago
My (now passed) 90 year old grandmother said she didn't want to date anyone in her retirement home because they were all too old for her and she didn't have the energy to lift her butt in the air anymore. She had 8 children and said that every time she took her pants off she got pregnant. I hope I'm as spunky when I'm 90.
#7
"Racism is surprisingly common. I am British but not white so I face a lot of these comments. Sometimes I can be on an entire shift without a white British staff member...
If you’re a racist, I have one thing to say to you... 'Grow the f**k up.'"
Foxxy 7 years ago
I understand asking for someone who is more fluent in your language due to misunderstandings and language barriers but definitely not because of race. That’s just ignorant. My regular GP is an Indian and there are rare occasions where he says something that I need him to repeat and he is happy to do so. He is one of the best GP’s I have come across in a very long time.
#8
"We end up giving them an IV instead since they were adamant they didn’t want a suppository."
#9
"After much deliberation and a look through their medical records, we realised they meant “Sickle Cell” as in anemia."
#10
"This was truly one of the most bizarre excuses I’ve ever heard for a dildo stuck up the butt. This patient insisted that he was minding his own business, running as he normally does in the morning when a dildo wielding assailant appeared and started chasing after him. He claimed he tripped and that’s when our mysterious dildo man inserted the toy... Did we believe him... No... and they never caught the dildo wielding man."
#11
"These types end up in the ED often and often they just need to go home and sleep it off. Discharge is often queried with “How am I supposed to get home?!” Why is that my problem? The Ambulance Service is not your personal taxi service."
tuzdayschild 7 years ago
Well, if you sit awhile over there in that waiting room, you can take yourself home in the morning.
Add New Image
Explore more of these tags
What do you think ?
Jo Choto 7 years ago
My mother has some neuropathy (numbness) in her feet as a result of chemo. She keeps telling people she has necrophilia.
Madonna Rose 7 years ago
If you have to take her places...I think is just wait in the car for her rather than catch the strange looks from people that don’t get it! Lol
Load More Replies...
Wil Vanderheijden 7 years ago
Two young men are sitting in hospital and get into a conversation: 1. "So what are you here for? " 2. "I had a castration, and you? 1. "Just here for observation?" 2. "Damn, that's the word I forgot."
Madonna Rose 7 years ago
Hahahahaha...defiantly to late for an evaluation!
Load More Replies...
darubyprincess 7 years ago
Half of these belong on r/boneappletea. The other half is just people being idiots. Still funny anyways!
Jo Choto 7 years ago
My mother has some neuropathy (numbness) in her feet as a result of chemo. She keeps telling people she has necrophilia.
Madonna Rose 7 years ago
If you have to take her places...I think is just wait in the car for her rather than catch the strange looks from people that don’t get it! Lol
Load More Replies... Wil Vanderheijden 7 years ago
Two young men are sitting in hospital and get into a conversation: 1. "So what are you here for? " 2. "I had a castration, and you? 1. "Just here for observation?" 2. "Damn, that's the word I forgot."
Madonna Rose 7 years ago
Hahahahaha...defiantly to late for an evaluation!
Load More Replies... darubyprincess 7 years ago
Half of these belong on r/boneappletea. The other half is just people being idiots. Still funny anyways!
Related on Bored Panda
