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A parent’s influence is immense, which is why children—even as grown-ups later in life—are often a reflection of what’s been taught to them over the years. Moms and dads typically try their best to instill what they believe is right, hoping that some things will stick or become a positive habit.

A teacher and a mother of two, Payal Desai went viral on TikTok for her ways of raising her children. In a series of videos titled ‘No Dusty Sons’, she shares the valuable lessons she teaches her boys from an early age in the hopes that their future partners won’t have to deal with certain related issues. Payal’s videos—especially her signature look into the soul of the camera—created quite a buzz online and garnered over 243k followers on her TikTok account.

TikToker’s videos went viral after she shared the things she teaches her two sons

Image credits: payalforstyle

Payal’s videos about raising her boys attract millions of views

@payalforstyle Dust off your journal - time to write it down. #teachingoursons #funny #momsoftiktok #momlife #momofboys #journaling #dustyson #dustydaughter #trending ♬ original sound - Bryan

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    #2

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    James016
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    10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Would that extend to “no mum, I don’t want to be in your videos”?

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    Nico
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    10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    The thing that make me uncomfortable is the underlying idea that all men don't understand any of these things unless taught. I am a man and none of these things have been specifically taught. Most men know how to be a good man, without constantly being talked down upon.

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    rubee avatar
    Ru Bee
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    10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Eva It is normal, I teach Biology, I teach the boys at my school that everyone has underarm hair after puberty butI still shave mine. It's itchy if I don't.

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    jaydenpenzien_1 avatar
    baby frog
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    10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    we’re trying this with my brother. he gets so violent and abusive when upset

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    impossiblekat avatar
    Kat Lyle
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    10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Best thing I learnt was write a list together so you both know what you want and need and whether or not you have it because you will check for the stuff you mentioned first.

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    D. Pitbull
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    10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Yeah... I know more than a few individuals who need this. As in, no, being helpful or considerate *only* within your own narrow scope of "I feel like it now" (but otherwise being insensitive, dismissive or selfish) does not mean you're being mindful and she's being difficult.

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    Connie Bonneville
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    10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Installing soft close seats and expecting everyone in the house male or female to close the lid before they flush so a plume of feces doesn't sprinkle the whole bathroom

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    sonja-szabrotska avatar
    Sonja
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    10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Can I put myself in the line behind him while you're in the teaching mood? I am terrible with keeping my pantry organized

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    xxx
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    10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Oh no! This is nightmare territory for me. Imagine being forced to watch 'men's' sports and boom just when you think it's over - MORE SPORT! (Joke :) - don't care if it's men or woman sport, I don't want to watch either haha please don't make me)

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    Mark Bayliss
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    10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Or just maybe that if you agree to set off at x time, be ready at x time. It is just as disrespectful to not bother about other people's efforts to be ready at the specified time.

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    Ali Sherlock
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    10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    I get the idea behind this but it's been proven that bed bugs thrive in sheets that are covered by doona's etc...leaving the blankets folded at the end of bed for example is better because the open air is deadly to bed bugs.

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    kicki avatar
    Panda Kicki
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    10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    Why should she motivate him? If a grown person chooses being a couch potato its their right. Good to have good habits from childhood, but cant see why a partner should be responsible for exercise.

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    Panda Kicki
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    10 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

    What is "retail theraphy "? Like a shopping spree for mental health? I agree with the cleaning, organizing, period awerness etc, but this confused me.

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    Some people believed her views are heteronormative, TikToker responded with a video

    @payalforstyle Replying to @dezloves ♬ original sound - Payal Desai

    Payal’s videos seemingly split the internet into camps; while some praise the woman, others believe her messages might come across as heteronormative. However, quite a few of them on both sides agree that the things she teaches her boys are valuable life lessons and rules of common decency, which should apply to everyone no matter the circumstances.

    A piece in the New York Times emphasized that learning manners as a child can bring long-term benefits, as research suggests there’s a positive link between their social skills in kindergarten and success and wellbeing in adulthood.

    It also pointed out that praising children for showing sympathy and courtesy, and discussing others’ feelings can help them to develop a sense of empathy. “They’re life skills that help so much with our social and emotional I.Q. — things like recognizing social cues and developing good listening skills,” assistant clinical professor of pediatrics at the Icahn School of Medicine at Mount Sinai in New York City, Dr. Jennifer Trachtenberg, told the New York Times.

    A 2012 study revealed that being considerate of others and sharing can bring happiness to children as young as toddlers—before the age of two, kids show greater happiness giving treats to others than getting them themselves. One of the academics behind the research, Lara Aknin, told CNBC that such a positive feeling might encourage the child to act this way in the future as well. “Ideally caregivers can scaffold these opportunities to allow kids to give in meaningful and direct ways that lead kids to feel like they have chosen to help,” she said.

    When it comes to children and values, quite a few people believe it’s important to instill a sense of responsibility into them as well. According to Pew Research Center, as much as 93% of surveyed adults in the US agree that teaching kids to be responsible is “especially important” and more than half of them believe it might be more important than other traits and qualities.

    Unfortunately, there is no one right way to raise kids, whether it’s a son or daughter. But thanks to the internet, parents can share their insight and experiences, which might be beneficial for other moms and dads out there; or fun to watch, at least. And it seems that Payal’s content on how she raises her boys has quite a few fans, who make sure to show their support in the comments under her videos.

    The online community showed support and appreciation to the mom in the comments