“No Means No”: 16 Simple Lessons That Will Turn This Mom’s Sons Into Someone’s Dream Husbands
A parent’s influence is immense, which is why children—even as grown-ups later in life—are often a reflection of what’s been taught to them over the years. Moms and dads typically try their best to instill what they believe is right, hoping that some things will stick or become a positive habit.
A teacher and a mother of two, Payal Desai went viral on TikTok for her ways of raising her children. In a series of videos titled ‘No Dusty Sons’, she shares the valuable lessons she teaches her boys from an early age in the hopes that their future partners won’t have to deal with certain related issues. Payal’s videos—especially her signature look into the soul of the camera—created quite a buzz online and garnered over 243k followers on her TikTok account.
TikToker’s videos went viral after she shared the things she teaches her two sons
Image credits: payalforstyle
Payal’s videos about raising her boys attract millions of views
@payalforstyle Dust off your journal - time to write it down. #teachingoursons #funny #momsoftiktok #momlife #momofboys #journaling #dustyson #dustydaughter #trending ♬ original sound - Bryan
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Yeah... I know more than a few individuals who need this. As in, no, being helpful or considerate *only* within your own narrow scope of "I feel like it now" (but otherwise being insensitive, dismissive or selfish) does not mean you're being mindful and she's being difficult.
Installing soft close seats and expecting everyone in the house male or female to close the lid before they flush so a plume of feces doesn't sprinkle the whole bathroom
For sanitary reasons, the seat and lid should both be down before the toilet gets flushed. That's what I taught my son.
This one is dumb. So when he wants to pee he's taught that he has to 1) lift the seat; 2) pee; 3) close the seat, meanwhile a girl will 1) pee and that's it? Not to mention, as many others have pointed out, it's more sanitary if everyone pees while sitting and then closes the lid before flushing, regardless of gender.
It is very important for Bored Panda to meet their daily man bashing quota.
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I'm so sad to see that poor boy being used for media attention... that shouldn't be allowed! Hope this will be forbidden in the future. I'm saying that as a psychotherapist.
How people aren't closing the lid on the toilet is beyond me. Just why
Yes, thank you. And we have dogs. I do NOT want e coli on their facial hair and all over furniture, clothing, other people, etc. It's gross allowing/making your dogs drink from a toilet
I wish you were my MIL! Why is so blasted hard to understand that it is incredibly rude AND arrogant to make other people touch the toilet seat on which urine was splashed! (My son sits.to pee!....so if I did nothing else right...I taught him to be considerate of the next.person to use the toilet.)
I read somewhere that it's actually beneficial for males to sit and pee when possible,good for the prostrate or along those lines was definitely a bona fide medical report thing....also my father used to make us boys kneel at the pan to pee also (we do tend to sprinkle and not on purpose either)
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This is shite. EVERYONE should be responsible for moving the seat up or down. Lid should be closed before each flush anyway
If a person does not have the wherewithal to check before sitting, they deserve what may result. It takes less energy to turn your head then to complain about a toilet seat to whomever used it last.
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This is the only one that gives me pause. I personally close the lid entirely when I’m done because I think of it as resetting the bathroom for the next person. HOWEVER, everyone needs to be responsible for their own toilet seat experience, it makes no sense why someone wouldn’t look at the toilet before sitting down.
As a woman, I agree. And honestly, so long as you're washing your hands afterwards, it's nbd.
Load More Replies... The further I go with these posts, the more it feels like the son will grow up resenting men and being gay. You are all free to hate me based on voicing my opinion, as seems to be the result of opinions differing from the mainstream. (for the sake of clarity I will add, this comment is not about toilet seats). Each post sounds very much like "Hey everybody LOOK AT ME. I am teaching my son that living with men is a nightmare, aren't you impressed with ME, ME, ME??". this theme is repeated with every post. This is what I see, but to each their own, as it should be. Thank you for reading.
I highly doubt that she's actually telling her son "Men suck and this is why." Most likely, she's telling him "These are good manners."
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Everyone should put the seat down before flushing, every single time before hitting the lever/button. That initial pressure flings it the most! and that excuse, "there was no 💩 in there when I flushed", „well there was at one time and unless I just bleached the toilet, it's still in there!!„
Also teach the girls to lift the toilet seat after they use it so they can wipe off their pee that sprays under the seat and drips down the front of the bowl. Guys go to lift the seat and get their fingers wet on her pee.
That's an ignorant question. Woooww so many males are sooo triggered here HILARIOUS
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Or just maybe that if you agree to set off at x time, be ready at x time. It is just as disrespectful to not bother about other people's efforts to be ready at the specified time.
I get the idea behind this but it's been proven that bed bugs thrive in sheets that are covered by doona's etc...leaving the blankets folded at the end of bed for example is better because the open air is deadly to bed bugs.
Why should she motivate him? If a grown person chooses being a couch potato its their right. Good to have good habits from childhood, but cant see why a partner should be responsible for exercise.
What is "retail theraphy "? Like a shopping spree for mental health? I agree with the cleaning, organizing, period awerness etc, but this confused me.
Some people believed her views are heteronormative, TikToker responded with a video
@payalforstyle Replying to @dezloves ♬ original sound - Payal Desai
Payal’s videos seemingly split the internet into camps; while some praise the woman, others believe her messages might come across as heteronormative. However, quite a few of them on both sides agree that the things she teaches her boys are valuable life lessons and rules of common decency, which should apply to everyone no matter the circumstances.
A piece in the New York Times emphasized that learning manners as a child can bring long-term benefits, as research suggests there’s a positive link between their social skills in kindergarten and success and wellbeing in adulthood.
It also pointed out that praising children for showing sympathy and courtesy, and discussing others’ feelings can help them to develop a sense of empathy. “They’re life skills that help so much with our social and emotional I.Q. — things like recognizing social cues and developing good listening skills,” assistant clinical professor of pediatrics at the Icahn School of Medicine at Mount Sinai in New York City, Dr. Jennifer Trachtenberg, told the New York Times.
A 2012 study revealed that being considerate of others and sharing can bring happiness to children as young as toddlers—before the age of two, kids show greater happiness giving treats to others than getting them themselves. One of the academics behind the research, Lara Aknin, told CNBC that such a positive feeling might encourage the child to act this way in the future as well. “Ideally caregivers can scaffold these opportunities to allow kids to give in meaningful and direct ways that lead kids to feel like they have chosen to help,” she said.
When it comes to children and values, quite a few people believe it’s important to instill a sense of responsibility into them as well. According to Pew Research Center, as much as 93% of surveyed adults in the US agree that teaching kids to be responsible is “especially important” and more than half of them believe it might be more important than other traits and qualities.
Unfortunately, there is no one right way to raise kids, whether it’s a son or daughter. But thanks to the internet, parents can share their insight and experiences, which might be beneficial for other moms and dads out there; or fun to watch, at least. And it seems that Payal’s content on how she raises her boys has quite a few fans, who make sure to show their support in the comments under her videos.
The online community showed support and appreciation to the mom in the comments
So, none of this is about the son's happiness? Every one of these is about how he should behave FOR SOMEONE ELSE. Now I understand that this was done to women for millennia, having to adjust their lives for other people's expectations. Reversing this is not solving the problem. Making his bed so HE feels good about himself. |Writing down his feelings so HE can manage his emotions for HIIMSELF. Understanding menstruation, ok thats fair enough. But making him live every action through the lens of an imaginary future mate is the opposite of a healthy mental state.
Not to mention, what if the son doesn't want a female partner? Seems like he's been groomed for one all his life.
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Teaching my son how to be a normal human being has nothing to do with catering to a woman.
Could it possibly be that she is teaching her son to be a different man than the male role models she’s had in her life that have been catered to by women and she just wants him to not be lazy and take advantage? This hasn’t come from nowhere. I don’t believe for one second that she wants her son to be a doormat but it seems to me that she is teaching from experience.
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If this is why you're teaching your son you're missing the point. Teach him because this is normal human behavior. Except the getting ready part.
She is teaching him that this is normal behavior, it just so happens that it will be helpful to his future partner or anyone else he interacts with, as well. But unfortunately, right now, many of these items are not normal behavior for a lot of men and it makes the people around them miserable and likely makes themselves miserable. We have to start with teaching our sons how to be fully functional, emotionally intelligent adults that have reasonable expectations of the human body.
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Some of these are really stupid. I've been teaching my sons to leave the toilet seat down and sit on it. Not because my daughter might fall into the toilet, but because it's proven to be healthier for men to sit. I've been teaching my children (!) not to spent $200,- on serums because that's insane. If you got a skin condition, go see a doctor. I've been teaching my children to get ready in time so others don't have to wait for them ...
Urinating while sitting only benefits males with prostate enlargement.
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She taught him a lesson about milking private moments for social clout too
Exactly. Pretty shameless and kind of sad really.
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The first thing that struck me was how hetro-normative this list is. The second thing was "I'm teaching him to do things so his future partner doesn't have to do them." Yeah, again with an assumption of having partner, but also it should be taught normal things for adults to do.
It's the equivalent of screaming "YOU NEED TO GET MARRIED!" every day to a kid. Seriously, not gonna help.
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This is mostly good hygiene and manners, that people of every gender and age should learn; this shouldn't be taught just to boys but to everyone else too. It's not just to make "your daughter" feel comfortable, these behaviours should be normalised.
Cool, teach him basic life skills- cooking, cleaning, laundry are all important regardless of relationship status. I hope somewhere in her TikTok influencer land she works with him on healthy boundary setting and making sure he has an equal role in the relationship. Train him that his needs are important too and that he also gets a turn. I worry that she's training him to define his worth through the approval of his partner and that's a bad metric and can lead to very uneven and abusive relationships. That kid's first wife is going to have a very interesting mother-in-law problem.
I'm so glad to see so many people in the comments here saying her motivation is skewed. I don't care if my kid is a boy or a girl I'm teaching them things so they can be good, happy, healthy, and productive adults capable of making good decisions. Not so they can appease a future partner. If you're raising you kid on a set of moral built specifically to appease others your not putting enough into your child.
Why are you downvoted? Let me fix that, you're right. Any child should know how not to be a jack, and that's not for a partner but their own better life
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She's teaching him to cater only for someone else's needs. How about lessons to benefit/help himself e.g. learning to stand up for himself, how to set boundaries, and how to improve his mental health.
Although I do approve of the messages themselves: ugh, these badly subbed tikfuck videos aren't content, they're filler. Can we please start to collectively downvote such bullshít?
Hmm I do think men should understand women but I don't think this is how to do it. I feel like this could make him very susceptible to abuse and willing to accept an imbalance of power in a relationship. I feel like you should teach your son mental, physical and emotional wellness for himself and he should be able to keep his home clean for himself
A lot of these were about keeping his own house tidy, and she's also teaching him mindfulness. I think it's pretty balanced.
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The first part was good, both boys and girls need to be taught to organise, clean up l, take care of themselves and be emphatic to ailments you don't experience yourself. The last teachings though, yikes. If your girl spends more than she should based on your combined income, you can 100% question if she needs the $200 cosmetic or the retail therapy...
I love the conversation here... I just am also thinking, this is the weirdest house. Why did they bring grass into the bed with the tray. Where is the furniture and is that a kitchen cupboard with bins? Why.
Influencer houses for some reason always look AI generated.
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Why are so many of these do this, or do that, so your daughter doesn’t have to deal with it? What if he grows up and doesn’t want kids? I agree with others on here, teach him these lessons for himself.
She means the "daughter" of people watching as in his future wife. Took me a moment as well
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You were teaching yourself some very good things. But unless he's going to make a lot of money in his life, he doesn't need to get used to $200 skin care products and a wife who over shops. I understand shopping can be soothing, but there is also a budget.
Some of these aren't terrible and some of them are actually ridiculous. Like the woman's sports
Half of this stuff is normal things to teach your kid. The other half (like “retail therapy” and justifying $200 beauty products? That’s just wrong. Just read the comments. Also, making your kid pose so you can brag about how great of a parent you are on social media? Not great. There’s even a good chance she’s not even teaching her son this stuff.
This kid is going to have SO many issues. Can you imagine if this was reversed as a father training a young daughter for her future husband???
Tell me you are pissed at your husband, taking it out on your poor sons, and need kudos without telling me. Some of this stuff is ridiculous.
Some of these are good lessons... Not so "your daughter' can have a nicer life but because this is what being a decent human should entail. However some of the latter ones were her training her son to tolerate her idiotic ideals. $200 on skin cream? "Retail therapy"? No that's wasting money to feel better than oh you know writing your feelings down and working through them as you suggested he do.
This is creepy af. You should definitely teach your kids to value others and be a good person, but this is like training up a husband. There's a real toxic positivity vibe here. I mean, regardless of what is being taught, if this were a father teaching his daughter to be a good partner, it would be unacceptable on almost any level. Super duper cringe
I'm so happy there are mothers that are really committed to raising their sons to be fully functional, emotionally intelligent adults that value others. I'm happy because I have a daughter near the age of her son's, I also have a small son that I hope to instill these values in as well. These things will help him take care of himself as well as any future partner in a way that is much too rare in adult men of the current and past generations.
I feel like all of this could be 'teaching my child' instead of focusing on him being male? I say that as a female with a young son and daughter. I would want them both to be educated in all this regardless of their gender (bar the retail therapy one which doesn't resonate with me at all)
I'm so happy about this. People need to teach their kids how to care and be cared about. And as for whether it's heteronormative - it may be, but unless she's actively homophobic, the kid'll be fine if he turns out gay.
Would be funny if he turned out gay 😅 But all of this would still be valid. All of the disgusted comments saying she's teaching him to do things not for himself but for his wife are silly : millions of women complain that men are lazy disgusting selfish pricks, here we have a mom teaching his son to be a decent human being and they STILL COMPLAIN !! Sometimes humanity leaves me speechless.
The mum's lessons are all important. However, much of the focus is that the son should learn these lessons in order to please someone else.
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Cool. You might also want to teach him how women should treat him
Maybe teach him that his potential partner (male or female) should do things he likes doing, instead of blatantly bashing one gender
I’m into the concept and message (mostly) but I’m not cool with her using her son as a literal prop.Not sure how consent-oriented that choice is and her point could be delivered in so many other ways.
All of these things seem good to teach your son, not for another person's daughter, but for your own son. And while you're at it.. Teach your daughter as well. Also a 200 dollar serum?! That definitely does need justification!
I agree with many things but numbers 9,10,15,and 16 are just ridiculous. For the rest I hope she will teach the same to her daughter, if she has one.
I dunno. I teach my boys and girls not to be d***s and take responsibility for themselves because they need skills to look after themselves for their own benefit before anyone else's
Some of these are good, some of these are very odd and kind of cover her own issues, and a few of these are just passive aggressively anti-male for no reason. Someone hurt her and now she's going to make sure her son doesn't do it, because she's assuming her son being male, is going to hurt someone just because he's male. This is the mental health of someone who does 'retail therapy' instead of, you know, actual therapy.
I appreciate that teaching your sons to do their share and show respect from a female point of view is important. Telling your boy that justifying $200 on "vanity" for a woman who is already supposedly in a committed relationship is wrong on every level. As is "retail therapy." You can't assume that much financial flexibility by making sure a woman's looks, ie.. clothes and make-up are important. Why...so she can continue to look pretty to OTHER people. Why aren't you telling your son that it's okay to spend $200 on a round of golf 🤔 because he may need the "personal time" I see a VERY sexist singular point of view being taught here. Men should be respectful and s3lf sufficient. They should NOT be conditioned to cater to women's stereotypical behaviors. You've got some good intentions, but you're going too far.
Some of these are perfectly fine. But way too many of these are teaching your son to accept toxic behavior from the woman in his life in the vein that women have spent generations teaching their daughters to put up with toxic behaviors from men. The fact that you're "doing for his future girlfriend" gives away your game. You have toxic behaviors that aren't being accepted so you're training your son to put up with them. Stop. Stop. Stop.
The titles are kind of clicky baity, but the lessons are good for his development as a person.
Plot twist he grows up to marry lazy nephew🤣🤣🤣. I love what this mom is doing but it bothers me that it's being presented for anything but his own benefit. All of my brothers know how to cook and clean. They don't wait for women to take on basic life skills. However they are still womanizing pigs who will cook and put the toilet seat down.
Is she gonna make a follow up where she teaches her daughter how to be a strong person who can recognize, appropriately call out and avoid people with clearly bad self interested behavior?
This is awesome. All children should learn these. But girls have definitely put up with things. The thing is I don't do everything myself if I have a BF. I include him whether he wants to or not. I have ADHD and will forget stuff. So, if he does not want things forgotten when I pack, he has to join, same goes with my kid.
I like how this entire article suggest that women never lack in these departments. Trust me, I've met plenty of women that are less organized, clean, emotionally considerate, and active than myself. Also, I care more about my skincare routine, retail therapy and fashion more than my GF, and no, my mom didn't teach me that.
I really love this! But I also hope he's educated and allowed to be himself too. Unfortunately, I feel that he's going to end up with women that exploit this. I hope she's teaching them a strong sense of self and not just how to cater to a woman
Teaching her son how to deal with all the problems she faces as a woman and neglecting any of the problems that are specific to being a man. Teaching my son never to be alone with a woman in the office because HR will implicitly believe her word over his. Teaching my son how to disappear so that he doesn't have to deal with everyone assuming he's a threat in ever public space. Teaching my son how to deal with being alone because as an adult the things that allow him to make friends are suddenly inappropriate behavior and creepy.
These are things that all boys need to know, not just for the sake of a hypothetical female mate, but also and most importantly so that they can survive adulthood on their own instead of running to mommy for everything.
Thank you for teaching your son good lessons. It doesn't need to be for someone else's daughter. It will help him be independent and respectful
*MAYBE* You have *RUBBISH* taste in women or your lying and you hate all women.
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So, none of this is about the son's happiness? Every one of these is about how he should behave FOR SOMEONE ELSE. Now I understand that this was done to women for millennia, having to adjust their lives for other people's expectations. Reversing this is not solving the problem. Making his bed so HE feels good about himself. |Writing down his feelings so HE can manage his emotions for HIIMSELF. Understanding menstruation, ok thats fair enough. But making him live every action through the lens of an imaginary future mate is the opposite of a healthy mental state.
Not to mention, what if the son doesn't want a female partner? Seems like he's been groomed for one all his life.
Load More Replies... Teaching my son how to be a normal human being has nothing to do with catering to a woman.
Could it possibly be that she is teaching her son to be a different man than the male role models she’s had in her life that have been catered to by women and she just wants him to not be lazy and take advantage? This hasn’t come from nowhere. I don’t believe for one second that she wants her son to be a doormat but it seems to me that she is teaching from experience.
Load More Replies... If this is why you're teaching your son you're missing the point. Teach him because this is normal human behavior. Except the getting ready part.
She is teaching him that this is normal behavior, it just so happens that it will be helpful to his future partner or anyone else he interacts with, as well. But unfortunately, right now, many of these items are not normal behavior for a lot of men and it makes the people around them miserable and likely makes themselves miserable. We have to start with teaching our sons how to be fully functional, emotionally intelligent adults that have reasonable expectations of the human body.
Load More Replies... Some of these are really stupid. I've been teaching my sons to leave the toilet seat down and sit on it. Not because my daughter might fall into the toilet, but because it's proven to be healthier for men to sit. I've been teaching my children (!) not to spent $200,- on serums because that's insane. If you got a skin condition, go see a doctor. I've been teaching my children to get ready in time so others don't have to wait for them ...
Urinating while sitting only benefits males with prostate enlargement.
Load More Replies... She taught him a lesson about milking private moments for social clout too
Exactly. Pretty shameless and kind of sad really.
Load More Replies... The first thing that struck me was how hetro-normative this list is. The second thing was "I'm teaching him to do things so his future partner doesn't have to do them." Yeah, again with an assumption of having partner, but also it should be taught normal things for adults to do.
It's the equivalent of screaming "YOU NEED TO GET MARRIED!" every day to a kid. Seriously, not gonna help.
Load More Replies... This is mostly good hygiene and manners, that people of every gender and age should learn; this shouldn't be taught just to boys but to everyone else too. It's not just to make "your daughter" feel comfortable, these behaviours should be normalised.
Cool, teach him basic life skills- cooking, cleaning, laundry are all important regardless of relationship status. I hope somewhere in her TikTok influencer land she works with him on healthy boundary setting and making sure he has an equal role in the relationship. Train him that his needs are important too and that he also gets a turn. I worry that she's training him to define his worth through the approval of his partner and that's a bad metric and can lead to very uneven and abusive relationships. That kid's first wife is going to have a very interesting mother-in-law problem.
I'm so glad to see so many people in the comments here saying her motivation is skewed. I don't care if my kid is a boy or a girl I'm teaching them things so they can be good, happy, healthy, and productive adults capable of making good decisions. Not so they can appease a future partner. If you're raising you kid on a set of moral built specifically to appease others your not putting enough into your child.
Why are you downvoted? Let me fix that, you're right. Any child should know how not to be a jack, and that's not for a partner but their own better life
Load More Replies... She's teaching him to cater only for someone else's needs. How about lessons to benefit/help himself e.g. learning to stand up for himself, how to set boundaries, and how to improve his mental health.
Although I do approve of the messages themselves: ugh, these badly subbed tikfuck videos aren't content, they're filler. Can we please start to collectively downvote such bullshít?
Hmm I do think men should understand women but I don't think this is how to do it. I feel like this could make him very susceptible to abuse and willing to accept an imbalance of power in a relationship. I feel like you should teach your son mental, physical and emotional wellness for himself and he should be able to keep his home clean for himself
A lot of these were about keeping his own house tidy, and she's also teaching him mindfulness. I think it's pretty balanced.
Load More Replies... The first part was good, both boys and girls need to be taught to organise, clean up l, take care of themselves and be emphatic to ailments you don't experience yourself. The last teachings though, yikes. If your girl spends more than she should based on your combined income, you can 100% question if she needs the $200 cosmetic or the retail therapy...
I love the conversation here... I just am also thinking, this is the weirdest house. Why did they bring grass into the bed with the tray. Where is the furniture and is that a kitchen cupboard with bins? Why.
Influencer houses for some reason always look AI generated.
Load More Replies... Why are so many of these do this, or do that, so your daughter doesn’t have to deal with it? What if he grows up and doesn’t want kids? I agree with others on here, teach him these lessons for himself.
She means the "daughter" of people watching as in his future wife. Took me a moment as well
Load More Replies... You were teaching yourself some very good things. But unless he's going to make a lot of money in his life, he doesn't need to get used to $200 skin care products and a wife who over shops. I understand shopping can be soothing, but there is also a budget.
Some of these aren't terrible and some of them are actually ridiculous. Like the woman's sports
Half of this stuff is normal things to teach your kid. The other half (like “retail therapy” and justifying $200 beauty products? That’s just wrong. Just read the comments. Also, making your kid pose so you can brag about how great of a parent you are on social media? Not great. There’s even a good chance she’s not even teaching her son this stuff.
This kid is going to have SO many issues. Can you imagine if this was reversed as a father training a young daughter for her future husband???
Tell me you are pissed at your husband, taking it out on your poor sons, and need kudos without telling me. Some of this stuff is ridiculous.
Some of these are good lessons... Not so "your daughter' can have a nicer life but because this is what being a decent human should entail. However some of the latter ones were her training her son to tolerate her idiotic ideals. $200 on skin cream? "Retail therapy"? No that's wasting money to feel better than oh you know writing your feelings down and working through them as you suggested he do.
This is creepy af. You should definitely teach your kids to value others and be a good person, but this is like training up a husband. There's a real toxic positivity vibe here. I mean, regardless of what is being taught, if this were a father teaching his daughter to be a good partner, it would be unacceptable on almost any level. Super duper cringe
I'm so happy there are mothers that are really committed to raising their sons to be fully functional, emotionally intelligent adults that value others. I'm happy because I have a daughter near the age of her son's, I also have a small son that I hope to instill these values in as well. These things will help him take care of himself as well as any future partner in a way that is much too rare in adult men of the current and past generations.
I feel like all of this could be 'teaching my child' instead of focusing on him being male? I say that as a female with a young son and daughter. I would want them both to be educated in all this regardless of their gender (bar the retail therapy one which doesn't resonate with me at all)
I'm so happy about this. People need to teach their kids how to care and be cared about. And as for whether it's heteronormative - it may be, but unless she's actively homophobic, the kid'll be fine if he turns out gay.
Would be funny if he turned out gay 😅 But all of this would still be valid. All of the disgusted comments saying she's teaching him to do things not for himself but for his wife are silly : millions of women complain that men are lazy disgusting selfish pricks, here we have a mom teaching his son to be a decent human being and they STILL COMPLAIN !! Sometimes humanity leaves me speechless.
The mum's lessons are all important. However, much of the focus is that the son should learn these lessons in order to please someone else.
Load More Replies... Cool. You might also want to teach him how women should treat him
Maybe teach him that his potential partner (male or female) should do things he likes doing, instead of blatantly bashing one gender
I’m into the concept and message (mostly) but I’m not cool with her using her son as a literal prop.Not sure how consent-oriented that choice is and her point could be delivered in so many other ways.
All of these things seem good to teach your son, not for another person's daughter, but for your own son. And while you're at it.. Teach your daughter as well. Also a 200 dollar serum?! That definitely does need justification!
I agree with many things but numbers 9,10,15,and 16 are just ridiculous. For the rest I hope she will teach the same to her daughter, if she has one.
I dunno. I teach my boys and girls not to be d***s and take responsibility for themselves because they need skills to look after themselves for their own benefit before anyone else's
Some of these are good, some of these are very odd and kind of cover her own issues, and a few of these are just passive aggressively anti-male for no reason. Someone hurt her and now she's going to make sure her son doesn't do it, because she's assuming her son being male, is going to hurt someone just because he's male. This is the mental health of someone who does 'retail therapy' instead of, you know, actual therapy.
I appreciate that teaching your sons to do their share and show respect from a female point of view is important. Telling your boy that justifying $200 on "vanity" for a woman who is already supposedly in a committed relationship is wrong on every level. As is "retail therapy." You can't assume that much financial flexibility by making sure a woman's looks, ie.. clothes and make-up are important. Why...so she can continue to look pretty to OTHER people. Why aren't you telling your son that it's okay to spend $200 on a round of golf 🤔 because he may need the "personal time" I see a VERY sexist singular point of view being taught here. Men should be respectful and s3lf sufficient. They should NOT be conditioned to cater to women's stereotypical behaviors. You've got some good intentions, but you're going too far.
Some of these are perfectly fine. But way too many of these are teaching your son to accept toxic behavior from the woman in his life in the vein that women have spent generations teaching their daughters to put up with toxic behaviors from men. The fact that you're "doing for his future girlfriend" gives away your game. You have toxic behaviors that aren't being accepted so you're training your son to put up with them. Stop. Stop. Stop.
The titles are kind of clicky baity, but the lessons are good for his development as a person.
Plot twist he grows up to marry lazy nephew🤣🤣🤣. I love what this mom is doing but it bothers me that it's being presented for anything but his own benefit. All of my brothers know how to cook and clean. They don't wait for women to take on basic life skills. However they are still womanizing pigs who will cook and put the toilet seat down.
Is she gonna make a follow up where she teaches her daughter how to be a strong person who can recognize, appropriately call out and avoid people with clearly bad self interested behavior?
This is awesome. All children should learn these. But girls have definitely put up with things. The thing is I don't do everything myself if I have a BF. I include him whether he wants to or not. I have ADHD and will forget stuff. So, if he does not want things forgotten when I pack, he has to join, same goes with my kid.
I like how this entire article suggest that women never lack in these departments. Trust me, I've met plenty of women that are less organized, clean, emotionally considerate, and active than myself. Also, I care more about my skincare routine, retail therapy and fashion more than my GF, and no, my mom didn't teach me that.
I really love this! But I also hope he's educated and allowed to be himself too. Unfortunately, I feel that he's going to end up with women that exploit this. I hope she's teaching them a strong sense of self and not just how to cater to a woman
Teaching her son how to deal with all the problems she faces as a woman and neglecting any of the problems that are specific to being a man. Teaching my son never to be alone with a woman in the office because HR will implicitly believe her word over his. Teaching my son how to disappear so that he doesn't have to deal with everyone assuming he's a threat in ever public space. Teaching my son how to deal with being alone because as an adult the things that allow him to make friends are suddenly inappropriate behavior and creepy.
These are things that all boys need to know, not just for the sake of a hypothetical female mate, but also and most importantly so that they can survive adulthood on their own instead of running to mommy for everything.
Thank you for teaching your son good lessons. It doesn't need to be for someone else's daughter. It will help him be independent and respectful
*MAYBE* You have *RUBBISH* taste in women or your lying and you hate all women.
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