Whether it’s heart disease misdiagnosed as anxiety, an autoimmune disorder attributed to depression, or ovarian cysts labeled as “normal period pain,” too many women know how it feels to be dismissed by a doctor. The scientific studies back up the fact that it’s not all just in your head. For example, this study from Academic Emergency Medicine discovered that women who went to the ER with severe stomach pain had to wait for a whopping 33% longer than male patients with the same symptoms.
This woman who shared a horrifying experience she had in the ER on the subreddit r/TwoXChromosomes is one of many female patients who have been gaslighted. Coming in with incredibly alarming symptoms, the author u/anon2217 said her male doctor not only completely dismissed her, he was very reluctant to do relevant tests as the woman pushed to be tested. Read her full story below.
Many women in the thread found it a safe place to speak up and share their own stories of being gaslighted by male doctors. It seems like there’s a serious health risk of being a woman in the ER, as if there weren't enough things we were told to suck up and carry on in this paternal society. It’s time to be heard.
This woman has recently shared a harrowing story of how a male ER doctor dismissed her alarming symptoms and was reluctant to test her
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I collapsed on the street. The paramedics told me I was having an anxiety attack and told me to calm down. I told them I've had anxiety attacks before, this wasn't that. It felt like something was crushing my chest. They told me oxygen is doing so I need to take bigger breath. I told them I couldn't. They laughed me off. Got to the ER and they told the receiving nurse I was there for anxiety. I waited 4 hours before the ER Dr suggested testing for pulmonary embolism. And he only did that because a nurse had to literally carry me to my chair after my 11 year old couldn't hold me up as I tried to go to the bathroom. Turns out my lungs were filled with blood clots and I was dying.
I found being pregnant means that any and all physical ailments are pregnancy related and not really concerning as long as baby is doing ok. It took me 6 doctor visits over a month's time before a doctor ordered an x-ray for my elbow after I fell in the shower and complained I couldn't use my arm. They insisted that sore joints are normal in pregnancy and I really REALLY don't want to risk my baby's health by getting an unnecessary x-ray, right?
Nope. Busted elbow.
I have anatomy besides reproductive that can need care, and not everything that goes wrong is attached to my uterus!
I came in crying and holding my abdomen due to severe pain. I was also puking due to the pain, so not my best moment. By the time I was in triage I’d stopped crying but was still hurting and the male nurse suggested that it could be acid reflux. Dude, I know what reflux is like and it’s not about to make me cry . They took my blood and urine and sent me back out to the lobby.
Hours later he finds me in the waiting room and says “you’ll never believe this, it’s pancreatitis!”
Uh, yes I do believe that. I came in here crying but since I’m a woman you decided I’m just being dramatic . I was hospitalized for 3 days.
If we don’t advocate for ourselves we get sh*t treatment. Sooo frustrating.
Bored Panda reached out to Redditor Ownthesea who shared her own very disturbing experience of being dismissed by a male doctor during a medical emergency. Horrifyingly, this was not the only time Ownthesea became a victim of gaslighting. “The second experience was when I went to my GI doctor about pain in my upper abdomen that felt like it was radiating from my back. He did some testing but eventually gave up and told me it’s surgery IBS, endometriosis, or a ‘psychological issue,’” the woman recounted.
She continued: “I was very distraught but went to my OBGYN to see about endometriosis and she said it didn’t fit the symptoms at all and it’s clearly GI issue. She wanted me to go back to him and get more testing done but at that point, I was frustrated and had spent a ton of money on testing. Three weeks later I ended up in the ER from the pain and found it was my gallbladder that needed to be removed ASAP,” Ownthesea said and added that “so no, it was not a woman’s problem and not a psychological issue.”
I won't go to the ER nearest my house anymore. I went there because I could tell I had a kidney stone. I was also on my period. The doctor came in and lectured me about how I wasn't allowed to go to the ER just because I didn't like my period, and that I was wasting his time. I was literally vomiting from the pain as he was yelling at me. I left and had to go straight to a different hospital, where I actually got treatment.
A few months later, my husband ate a huge dinner and had upper abdominal pain. We went to the hospital near the house because he didn't feel he could go further. They immediately gave him morphine and ordered a CT scan. He turned out to be constipated.
I had another problem, when I had an allergic reaction to a blood transfusion, and the young male doctor kept telling me loudly that it was just what blood transfusions feel like and to get over it. I had tried to explain that I have a disease that makes me have allergic reactions to lots of things, and that I needed a higher dose of antihistamines to treat a reaction than most people, but he yelled that he was the doctor and he'd make the diagnosis. I ended up getting my rescue meds out of my purse and taking them because I could feel my throat closing.
I was at that hospital again a year later and my doctor was a female who was actually listening. I was explaining what I have, how it affects me, and what treatment works. The young male doctor I'd seen the year before was walking past and stopped to listen, and was really interested in what I was saying. He didn't recognize me from the previous year. It was like he could listen because the other doctor was taking me seriously.
My GP sent to a psychiatrist. I had severe back pain that also went down my right leg and I could hardly walk. This was After begging for a CT scan (this was in 1997). I went to the psychiatrist and staggered in to his office. The first thing he asks is why I'm limping and I explain that the gp sent me to him because he thinks the pain is psychosomatic. He calls the gp and orders him to get me a CT stat. Turns out I had a large herniated disc L4/L5 with nerve damage and needed emergency surgery. Enden up with permanent nerve damage due to not getting surgery early enough.
I once had a rash around my lips. The male doctor I saw told me that I was licking my lips too much and that's all it was. I said, no, I have always licked my lips and this has never happened before. He told me that when he needs to remind himself to stop doing somthing, he snaps a rubberband on his wrist or slaps his hand to stop it and suggest I do it. I did lick my lips while there (because the rash was causing me to do it more excessively ) and he saw it and slapped my wrist! I was livid.
I pushed, and he gave me an antibiotic "just in case". Cleared up within a few days.
later, I found out on my own through trial and error it was that EOS chapstick and that most chapsticks will give me an allergic reaction to my lips. Never went back to him again.
Ownthesea explained that this kind of thing happens a lot and each time it’s frustrating. “Doctors love to suggest it’s psychological when they run out of ideas and my male friends have not had that suggested to them once,” she told us.
“We need to keep speaking up to see change,” the Redditor said. “Ignoring the issue won’t solve it, and going through years of chronic pain because it could just be psychological is bad medicine,” Ownthesea added. She also noted that none of her female practitioners have suggested her issues were psychological, and every “psychological issue” has ended up with a quick fix once it was finally diagnosed.
I dealt with the same sh*t (ha) when I was diagnosed with Crohn’s Disease. I had to get into a screaming match with the ER doc to get admitted because he didn’t think it was “enough” blood. That was Sunday. I didn’t walk out until Friday. I had a ruptured ulcer.
I would absolutely file a complaint against that doctor. Communicate that you very clearly told the doctor where they blood was coming from, he did not listen, had to be talked into running tests you obviously needed, and was ready to dismiss you before results came back, showing a lack on concern for the symptoms you came in with.
Even if your report does nothing, if ever single woman blown off by the doctor makes a report, a pattern will emerge.
Extreme pain. Went to male doc and was told that menstrual cramps can be really hard sometimes and was sent home. Ended up in the ER vomiting and barely able to stand up. Took my souvenir kidney stone to the first doc (mr. menstrual cramps) and shoved it in his face. At least he looked embarrassed and horrified. Never went back to him again.
I'm afraid You did not shove the kidney stone in the right area - lower my dear much lower. looked embarrassed and horrified you did not say he apologized - typical!
This happened to me when I was 36 weeks pregnant. I went to the ER and they did some blood work and checked on the baby. Then they told me I had hemorrhoids, "a gift mother's receive from their children."
Guess what smug ER ass**les, it was a 9cm tumor in my colon
I spent 2 years telling a specific doctor that something was wrong with my hearing. Went to a different doctor, got a CT scan and found a tumour.
Be persistant!
We have to be persistant. The whole thing is we should not have to be persistant! Why are they afraid to touch and examine us - because they know our bodies better than we do!
A few years ago I caught strep from my kids. Went to urgent care burning up way fever and tonsils so swollen I could barely close my mouth. The urgent care doc sent me to the ER and wanted me to have a CT scan on the tonsils. When I got there the first person I saw, a man, examined me and asked why I was there for just a case of strep, very dismissive like I was wasting his time. My husband explained that the urgent care doctor wanted a ct scan. They put me in a room for hours. Finally a different doctor came in, looked at my throat, and ordered a scan. Surprise! My tonsil was abscessed. The new doctor ordered iv antibiotics, fluids (was badly dehydrated from not being able to swallow), and iv steroids. I ended up staying over night and almost had to have surgery. I didn’t complain and I wish I had. I know the first doctor just stuck me in a room and didn’t bother with me again until a new doc came on the shift because he thought it wasn’t an emergency. Meanwhile, I was in absolute agony.
I hate this so much. We know our bodies. I had a big fat cyste on my left tube and I felt that something was wrong with it, because I had the worst pain I've ever had in my life. I fainted twice and felt like a knife was stabbed in my belly.
Male doctor insists I need to get my appendix checked, which is on the right of your body. I begged him for an echo and after another doctor had confirmed there was nothing wrong with my appendix I finally got the echo and was then rushed into surgery because the cyste happened to turn around and was literally blocking all blood flow to my tube. 10 minutes later and they had to removes my left tube.
Not nearly as bad but I had an asthma attack at work without access to an inhaler. EMTs came and told me it was probably just anxiety. I told them I do not have a history of anxiety attacks. I have a history of asthma. The EMTs were two 40+ men who didn't listen to a thing I said to them. I rejected their ride to the hospital and had my partner take me to my family doctor, who determined it was probably an asthma attack and sent me home with an inhaler which worked the next time I had a "anxiety". Imagine that.
One day, I was throwing up nonstop and couldn’t breathe. Honest to God, I thought I was dying. I was under an insane amount of stress between my career, preparing for major knee surgery, and getting married during COVID. I have ulcer flare-ups — plus, with endometriosis, my stomach is real wonky — but this was not right. My husband carried me to the ER, totally freaking out. The ER doctors judgmentally thought I was going through some kind of withdrawal. Mind you, I am a successful 28-year-old. I have never done drugs and hardly even drink. Turns out, I went into starvation ketoacidosis from not eating enough and getting sick from ulcers, which threw off my blood sugar. I also had a terrible period, and I'm not diabetic. I was in the ICU for a week. My nurses apologized profusely during my stay for how I was treated by the doctors. I work in the medical field, and I've never once interacted with doctors like those few in the ER. I understand it's a very demanding and stressful job, but not being taken seriously was really demoralizing
I met my wife when she was in medical school and was with her when she started having severe medical issues that no one could diagnose.
Since she was in med school and her father was a physician, she pointed out to me what the doctors were actually inferring when they questioned her and examined her. Since they could not find anything easy, they were subtly trying to get her to admit to making it all up and that she was faking it for attention.
We finally were able to get diagnosed, but only because I was able to fly her to the Mayo Clinic, the Cleveland Clinic, and a ton of other research hospitals over the course of 12 years. She ended up having a super rare autoimmune disease.
But, what I learned in those 12 years was that doctors don’t believe women, accuse them of exaggerating their pain and symptoms, and that each doctor has 5 pet diseases that they try to diagnose every patient with.
And, ER doctors are the worst. ER physicians are either residents working 100 hour weeks as slave labor or they are full time emergency medicine physicians (who graduated last in their class at med school) who couldn’t get into any other specialty.
my own mom went into the ER with severe chest & abdominal pain about ten years ago and the ER doc ordered an x-ray that showed a huge mass in her abdomen. He called it constipation and sent her home with laxatives. Six months later, another doctor figured out that the mass was a football sized ovarian cyst that ended up being cancerous. She ended up being okay after multiple major surgeries and chemo (thank GOODNESS) but sh*t, ER docs are dumber than doornails.
Yep! The ER doc don't make very good radiologists either. the laxatives could have done damage by them selves. 6 months later I wonder how much that tumor grew in 6 months!
I had GYN surgery and two days later I woke up in a pool of blood. It was before office hours and the doc on call wasn’t my doc who did the surgery. He told me that it was just my period like we don’t know when we’re having a period. I finally got my surgeon on the phone who told me to go to the ER immediately and she’d meet me there. Turns out the stitches didn’t hold and I would have bled to death if I had listened to the doc on call.
What I'm getting from this is that male doctors assume all blood below the waist is period-related and that women have no other period symptoms that they can identify than "blood down there".
Half of heart attacks happen 3-4 hours after symptoms begin showing.
Sudden Cardiac Death / SCD is what happens in the other half of cases.
When a woman reports the same exact symptoms as a man, she is often ignored or misdiagnosed by male doctors. You MUST advocate for yourself.
My sister went to the ER at a military base. One "doctor" kept insisting her symptoms were an anxiety attack. No, she was having a heart attack. Thank God for the female cardiologist that did the tests which indicated what was really happening to her. After a triple by-pass, and a hospital stay, my sister is still with us 20 years later. The cardiologist had some words with the idiot that misdiagnosed her. I hope he actually learned something from his almost fatal mistake.
When I was 15 was very ill and had dark red, then dark brown urine. Dr dismissed it as period blood. Happened again and again. Long story short. Diagnosed as Berger’s disease when I was 30. Years of Dialysis. Kidney transplant
I've always heard that dark brown urine is a sign that something is seriously wrong with your kidneys. Wtf? These so called doctors should be drummed out of the profession.
I had ER doctors dismiss me during a kidney stone because a pregnancy test came back positive — I had a miscarriage five days prior — and they thought I was 'drug-seeking.' They actually told me to go home and lay down with a hot water bottle. Two days later, when I was urinating blood and couldn't sleep or even sit, my primary doctor got me in to see someone. The first time, there was no pelvic exam or real exam of any kind. The second time, it took a LOT of phone calls with my primary doctor and complaints. It seriously pissed me off
A lady gp told me I was exaggerating how bad my periods were. After a year or more of getting know where I made yet another appointment. I could hardly walk and had no energy. Different lady gp, couldn’t see anything wrong with me but took a blood test to check for anaemia. Within an hour of being home the hospital sent a medic to collect me, I needed a massive blood transfusion, by rights I should have been dead.
I was lucky she did the test.
I have severe anemia - I do not absorb Iron from food, pills or shots. I get it IV. MY hgb. dropped 20 points in a month. I figured the doctor would notice it and give ne a call. He is in a clinic and one must get through the telephone mafia before the doctor calls mafia says if he responds to your call they will call me back called every 3 days got bitchy with the mafia and an appointment with another doctor who ordered the IV infusion @ hospital. I was 60 days before I got to see my doctor - and I will never see him again!
I went to the ER with a migraine and critically high blood pressure. I was given medication for nausea (??) and pushed out the door….
I have a history of brain tumor and stroke. It’s garbage how women are dismissed
Where does is the humanity go when you become a doctor - my guess is that it was never there in the first place!
Started peeing blood one day. Was asked by more than one person if I was sure I wasn’t on my period. They know we can check for that right? Like it doesn’t take much to prove where the blood is coming from. Luckily for me I just had a uti that was quickly fixed, but seriously folks, we aren’t that dumb.
According to the medical profession we as woman don't know our own bodily functions. The problem is some of theses undereducated doctors cant tell piss from paint!
Be vigilant because this can happen with female doctors too. I was having severe abdominal pain and NOTHING was helping. I tried yoga, I tried going for walks, I took gas pills, I tried a hot water bottle. Nothing. I could barely eat for days. I ended up calling out from a job interview to see a doctor because it was so bad. The only doctor available wasn’t my primary but was another female doctor. She said I was too young for it to be anything serious and it was just gas, but I kept pushing her that it was not just gas. She said if it would make me feel better, she would order an ultrasound. I said f*cking do it. Anyway, next day it got so bad that I went to the ER and surprise! My gallbladder was f*cked! It was full of stones. When they took it out, they said it was purple and it was a mess. I got a call the next week from my doctors office saying I actually did have gallstones and would need to get my gallbladder removed, and I said, yeah thanks but you’re a little late. That already happened.
I hate it with a passion when they say you’re too young for it to be anything serious. In the Netherlands we’re supposed to get an invitation for a free smear test every five years from the ago of 30. I didn’t get mine until I was 36, but I still wanted to get checked, partly because my periods were so irregular. My GP just would not check anything. He literally said, why was I complaining they were so far apart, surely I didn’t want *more* periods? Even when I finally got the invitation, he tried to discourage me, saying I was too young for there to be anything serious and it was a waste of time. The results were normal as it turned out, but I still wouldn’t call it a waste of time. Pillock.
I had a hemorrhoid rupture and bleeding and pain after a bought of IBS flare up. It was alot of blood and wouldnt stop and I was soaking through tissue. Told the nurse what was up and she out me in a room immediately. The doctor comes in "are you sure it's not just your cycle". F*ck man look at my chart I had a partial hysterectomy in 2004 I literally havent had a period in almost 20 years. Not it's not my f*cking period. He did an exam and sure enough a ruptured Fisher on the inside of my rectal area. They sedated me he did something dont really remember and gave me a suppository that costed $200 to fill. And when my IBS acts up it still bleed a little but not like that. I mean it was heavy and scary. Once you have had a hysterectomy any blood from anywhere down there is a concern. And I have had too many complications at this point to ignore it
Without checking my chart I had a doctor tell me that my nonstop nausea and vomiting was normal and caused by anxiety because it was my first pregnancy, and that were wasn’t anything they could give me unless I was willing to terminate. This was my second pregnancy.
I left and went to another hospital. There I was given IV fluids and offered IV zofran before the doctor came in, because they wanted to try to get me to be more comfortable immediately. When the doctor came in and after he listened to me, I was diagnosed with hyperemesis and not sent home until I’d had two bags of fluids and given an rx of zofran to tide me over until I could speak to my midwife
I had hyperemesis into my six month of pregnancy and at a visit told them and she looked at me and said that it ends in the first trimester!! The healthcare industry is full of f*****g idiots!!!
Took three trips to the er before they finally took my pain seriously.
I had a bad gallbladder. FOUR trips for them to actually care enough to find it.
Go to the surgeon. He goes on a long explanation about weight loss surgery. And goes to leave the room.
I said “ok but what about my gallbladder?”
HE HADNT EVEN LOOKED AT MY CHART AND JUST ASSUMED I WAS THERE FOR WEIGHT LOSS SURGERY.
At my after care I brought up the weight loss surgery (as he impressed that it was VITAL that I have it to keep living) and he was dismissive.
So I asked him flat out if my insurance wouldn’t cover it and he confirmed.
I wonder how many people he convinced to get unneeded surgery so he could over charge their insurance.
I’m surprised you stuck with that surgeon at all. I wonder if he was always that inhuman or whether he became so over the years…
I was peeing what looked like pure blood. ER was pretty sure I was mixing period blood into the sample. I was not having a period. Urologist then told me it was probably bladder cancer. It was not. It was a lupus attack, but still took awhile to get the right doctor to figure it out.
I had an abscess and had to go in four times before they took an X-ray. My whole neck was so swollen, I was drooling, everything tasted like cigarette ashes, and I wasn't able to swallow. I brought in a printout of symptoms and said, 'This, all of this.' They finally believed me — still, no pain meds, though. I didn't want them but found it odd that I was in so much pain I couldn't swallow, yet they didn't offer anything. Anytime my SO goes in for anything, he walks out with a prescription for pain meds and antibiotics. Talk about double standards. Now, a lot of the times, I walk into a hospital and say, 'This has been going on this long. I think this is what's going on.' I don't even care if they call me a 'Google doctor.' It's how I found out I had gallstones, a hernia, an infected salivary gland, and this abscess.
Two of those four times, I was sent home only to go back less than 24 hours later with more pain. The hernia didn't need an operation, but I was put on bed rest with a band around my stomach.
The surgeon who botched my daughter so badly he nearly killed her absolutely refused to believe that her pain was worse after surgery than before and treated her (and me) like we were idiots. I won't go into all the details because it still traumatizes me to this day, but she was medi-vacced out to a big hospital because they thought she was going to die, but not after me having to fight for her life for two days and nights, followed by waiting another ten days by her bedside while nobody could say for sure if she would survive.
Yep, got swipped by a car and knocked down while walking, told trauma dr I broke my arm. He said no, I told him to check again- yep I had broken my wrist, so bad I needed a plate and screws to fix!
Most of the people on this list would be dead or permanently maimed if they hadn’t pushed the doctor to check again. We should add it to the list of small but decidedly important small things they can do that save lives: wash your hands. Read the chart. Talk to the patient. Look at the patient. Touch the patient. Take the patient seriously. Prescribe only appropriate and necessary treatment. Check again.
I've had tons of strep throat over the years, and I still have my pockmarked tonsils. Once, I was at a movie and felt the popcorn kernel get stuck. Nothing I could do would get it out. My tonsils ended up with an infection, so I went in. The doctor told me it couldn't be a popcorn kernel, that doesn't make sense. I asked him to just look, but he insisted on testing me for strep, then sent me home. I ended up going back in and was told I had a bad infection, but he wasn't sure why. This time, he gave me antibiotics and sent me to an ENT specialist. That doctor also didn't believe me, but I finally managed to convince him to at least look. One tongue depressor and a hemostat later, I had a popcorn kernel souvenir to go with my horrible infection. They didn't even call me with the strep results because they were negative. Seriously, I had to go to the ENT for a popcorn kernel
Typical - Why don't they want to examine the patients - because they are busy or just damn lazy!
I went to a male ENT about 15 years ago for dizziness. My family doctor thought I had issues with my ears. The ENT just dismissed me after a brief exam saying I was having dizzy spells due to stress of being a new mother.
Fortunately my family doctor didn't agree with that at all and decided to send me to a cardiologist, and it was there at that doc it was discovered I have a mitral valve prolapse with regurgitation, and THAT was the cause of my dizziness.
My elderly mother was told by her orthopedist that her backache was from "old age" and she should get used to it. She went to a Boston hospital and they found a cyst pressing her spine and operated, curing the problem.
Yep folks don't get old your treatment from doctors will be platitudes or mental deterioration - since we don't get periods anymore they have to blame it on something!
I almost died from an infected and dead gallbladder. I was told over and over by male doctors it was “anxiety and acid reflux.” It took 6 trips to the ER and my father to get me admitted to the hospital for testing. I had lost 60 lbs in a month. Finally when the right scan was done I was taken into emergency surgery.
My doctor misdiagnosed a patient very badly she nearly died when confronted he said he didn't know who the patient was!!!!!!!!!!!!
Went to the ER with left side lower abdominal pain. Male doc walks in, glances at the chart and asks if I'm sure it's not my right side that hurt (appendix). Yeah doc, I'm pretty sure I know what side of my body hurts! He never did a pelvic. Ordered a CT, said ehh, I don't know, probably period pain (I was 2 weeks out). Went to my primary 2 days later. It was a cyst! Had ruptured while I was at the er. Another time I was having horrible chest pains, trouble breathing, thought I was having a heart attack. Went to the ER. Was stuck in a room. They did at least do a bunch of diagnostics. But the best they could come up with was "bad indigestion" and sent me home. That night was miserable, when I woke up I couldn't move. My primary sent me to a cardiologist. I walked in and explained all my symptoms to her and before even examining me she smiled and said "classic pleurisy, textbook symptoms." Nothing she could really do to help me but tell me stay hydrated and take pain meds, but at least I had answers until it went away! But the ER docs just shrugged and said we don't know
I nearly died from a long Covid blood clot in my brain because the male ER doctor was like “okay here’s some migraine medicine.” 36 hours later, I collapsed on my bedroom floor and had to go to the same ER by ambulance. The female doctor knew immediately that I was having a stroke.
I don’t mess with male doctors anymore if I have a say in it.
if I ever have to go to the ER ima ask for a female doctor bc they seem to be more consistently capable of dealing with female patients correctly
I sliced the side of my thumb near off, and they kept telling me they couldn't give me pain meds. I kept telling them I don't want pain meds, I want to know if I need stitches, and I'll take ibuprofen when I get home if I need it. Meanwhile, when my husband had lower right quadrant pain, they kept trying to give him pain meds. They ordered him a CT scan with contrast, blood work, etc. It turned out to be mild inflammation of his intestine. They kept asking him if he was sure he didn't need pain meds
What is with this assumption that women seek unneeded pain meds while men are offered them like it's a mint at a buffet?
After birth when I was hemhorraging, passing large blood clots and losing consciousness a male OBGYN told me "sometimes people lose consciousness from the sight of their own blood."
Within the next hour they were getting everything ready for multiple transfusions and debating on giving me an infusion to increase my blood volume.
Yep and when we have our periods we pass out and fall off the toilet when we see blood on our pads! What a douche canoe!
After my mom's heart attack, she was prescribed a few medications, one of which was a diuretic that only made her feel worse. Her (male) cardiologist's response amounted to "gee, that's too bad, that is the medication you need." She eventually went to a different hospital, a female cardiologist changed her to a different diuretic drug... problem solved!
I was helped to the ER and put in w/c. ER doc said numbness in legs was all in my head. Other doc saw me said I was suffering from GBS
A male neurologist slapped my thighs a couple of times and told me he couldn’t see my muscle spasms therefore it’s probably all in my head.
Surprise! It wasn’t.
A male neurologist told me if I didn't have supplemental insurance he could do nothing for me - he did not even touch me this was told to me while we were walking to his office, As I excused myself I pushed him hard up against the wall and told him he was a money grubber and I left!
Something similar happened to my mom. She didn’t have the earlier symptoms you had, just one day she went to the bathroom and you couldn’t believe the blood coming out of her rectum. The doctor at the er also asked her if she was sure it wasn’t her period. They ended up sending her for a colonoscopy. Good news and bad news, a colonoscopy 6 weeks later told us nothing about the bleeding. But they did find pre cancerous polyps and removed them
^ weeks later - she could have died waiting this long - for something like this some one with no symptoms should have been bumped!
This is exactly why when I had appendicitis (before I knew that was what I had) I refused to go to the hospital. I told my boyfriend I wasn't wasting the time or money at the ER to have a doctor tell me I just had bad gas or was overreacting to an upset stomach and sending me home. I ended up waiting until the next morning to go in, because the pain had gotten so bad at that point, and the doctor said if I had waited any longer I would've ended up in the ICU.
And they wonder why an intelligent woman won't go to the ER because this gal in all likelihood would have got sent home if she went in earlier but if it had been her boyfriend immediate attention!
Went to the ER for horrible kidney pain, they had me pee in a cup. Of course blood in my urine. The ER doctor asked me multiple times if I was menstruating. I finally had enough and said IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO LOOK. So sick of being treated like I dont live in this body. Never did find out what cause me horrible kidney pain for like 12 years. It went away just like it started. One day woke up and was fine after suffering for so long. I'll take it though. Still wont drink anything blue. Used to give me the worst pain with just a sip.
I have PCOS and presumed endometriosis, but I don't 'look' like someone with PCOS, so the ER male doctors didn’t take me seriously. I was keeled over vomiting. Several hours later, I had an ultrasound. I'd been hemorrhaging in my abdomen. They didn’t have an OBGYN on call, so they wanted to admit me. l opted not to as they said there was nothing they could do beyond give me morphine and a bed
They should have had an OBGYN on call or should have tracked one down, Morphine and a bed - both are available out of the hospital if you want to look - Most doctors have never felt real pain in their lives - most surgeons have never had surgery!
I peed major blood clots once and had 10/10 pain, sure it was kidney stones. I was told the same thing. They gave mean antibiotic, which I refused, and sent me home. I've had multiple experie ces like this. I feel that women aren't taken as seriously as men, there is something wrong there! Hope you are feeling better, hope you can remain strong, and punch something to get it out. Don't carry the anger with you. I've overboiled going to the Er all year with rage until I took myself down.
After all people we are considered the weaker sex both physically and emotionally1 We work with a cold hubby goes to bed for 5 days and needs to be waited on - NOT IN THIS HOUSE. Dear Doctor we are not stupid!
These stories are way too familiar. I've experienced it myself, and been there in the hospital by the side of my daughter, and with other female friends, having to fight on their behalf for the basic standard of care. When you are the patient, it is sometimes more than you can manage to advocate for yourself. Take someone with you to advocate for you. I have been that person many times for friends and family. I know I have categorically saved two lives by being a beast.
I regularly do that. It's pretty much my raison d'etre. In research, or in advocacy. A beast is sometimes required, tho' I'm told my nickname in some circles is pretty unflattering, and I don't care. I've seen docs try to rescind a DNR b/c they don't agree with it religiously, refuse to treat based on a one-glance assumption (me in one case, gave me a near-death experience as a result), etc. You do *not* compromise patient care if I'm around, and if you do, there *is* a consequence. Nobody claps, of course, until I leave, I suspect. Someone's gotta be the voice. Having an MD means I get a louder one.
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I was going through a suspected ectopic pregnancy and was suffering with excruciating pain in my shoulders and neck. The Dr came to examine me and asked about my pain. I was literally screaming in agony and he turned around and said I just pulled a muscle in my shoulders. Well turns out one of the common symptoms of internal bleeding is shoulder pain. My fallopian tube had ruptured and I was bleeding internally. The dr just tried brushing it off as a pulled muscle. Ended up needing emergency surgery and a blood transfusion. Now, I don't have a high pain tolerance but I'm not screaming and asking to die over a f*****g pulled muscle.
I'm sorry, he said what? Everyone who passed medical school knows that pain refers to the shoulder andupper back from various places in the torso. Or should. I am so so sorry he said that. My PTSD means my file is flagged "anxiety disorder" so they dismiss me before they even check my pulse.
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Female. MD. Been dismissed by competent (male) surgeon b/c "it's just her uterus". No, it wasn't. I still need a cane sometimes. I also get, "Well, why are you here, just diagnose yourself!" (No, that's stupid and risky.) Then there's "it's anxiety". No, it wasn't. Argh....
These stories are way too familiar. I've experienced it myself, and been there in the hospital by the side of my daughter, and with other female friends, having to fight on their behalf for the basic standard of care. When you are the patient, it is sometimes more than you can manage to advocate for yourself. Take someone with you to advocate for you. I have been that person many times for friends and family. I know I have categorically saved two lives by being a beast.
I regularly do that. It's pretty much my raison d'etre. In research, or in advocacy. A beast is sometimes required, tho' I'm told my nickname in some circles is pretty unflattering, and I don't care. I've seen docs try to rescind a DNR b/c they don't agree with it religiously, refuse to treat based on a one-glance assumption (me in one case, gave me a near-death experience as a result), etc. You do *not* compromise patient care if I'm around, and if you do, there *is* a consequence. Nobody claps, of course, until I leave, I suspect. Someone's gotta be the voice. Having an MD means I get a louder one.
Load More Replies... I was going through a suspected ectopic pregnancy and was suffering with excruciating pain in my shoulders and neck. The Dr came to examine me and asked about my pain. I was literally screaming in agony and he turned around and said I just pulled a muscle in my shoulders. Well turns out one of the common symptoms of internal bleeding is shoulder pain. My fallopian tube had ruptured and I was bleeding internally. The dr just tried brushing it off as a pulled muscle. Ended up needing emergency surgery and a blood transfusion. Now, I don't have a high pain tolerance but I'm not screaming and asking to die over a f*****g pulled muscle.
I'm sorry, he said what? Everyone who passed medical school knows that pain refers to the shoulder andupper back from various places in the torso. Or should. I am so so sorry he said that. My PTSD means my file is flagged "anxiety disorder" so they dismiss me before they even check my pulse.
Load More Replies... Female. MD. Been dismissed by competent (male) surgeon b/c "it's just her uterus". No, it wasn't. I still need a cane sometimes. I also get, "Well, why are you here, just diagnose yourself!" (No, that's stupid and risky.) Then there's "it's anxiety". No, it wasn't. Argh....
