Netizens Cringe Remembering They Did These 30 Things As They Didn’t Know They Were Inappropriate
InterviewWe all start out in this world knowing nothing about it and looking at it through the childish eyes of innocence, and we usually say and do things that don’t initially appear as something bad. But as we grow and start to see things a little differently, we often realize that some of those things were, to say the least, inappropriate.
Since these incidents usually make for a little embarrassing but mostly funny stories, when someone online asked Redditors to share their similar stories, they didn’t hesitate to start pouring in with answers. Scroll down to see what they wrote!
More info: Reddit
This post may include affiliate links.
I liked mixing words up, like saying I'm going to "shake a tower" instead of take a shower.
One of these words I played with was popcorn. I called it cocporn. And worst part is that nobody stopped me.
Well, of course no one stopped them. That would inevitably be followed by "Why?" and holy hell no one's going there
I do this by accident sometimes when my brain isn't working. And my mom thinks it's funny to do it with "if the shoe fits" - which comes out as "if the foo sh!ts". :)
Who downvoted me for sharing something dumb my mom does? Your mom probably sucks!
Load More Replies...Reverend Spooner would probably be embarrassed. The rest of us are amused.
I remain puzzled that his name didn't come up until basically the second page of comments!?
Load More Replies...I routinely tell people to "tay appention" when they are not paying attention. Zero effs.
My dad used to tell fairy tales that way. We cracked up. My daughter hated it. The Pee Little Thrigs
I have so many of these, especially with words that start which sh. Some I still use today are posh (shop), peech (sheep), poosh (soup), Kate and Sidney (Steak and kidney) and tricky Ellie (electricity). Most people who know me understand and a otnof my family use "my words" when talking to me.
I lived in Virginia with my parents but my grandparents and rest of the family lived in Canada. I was 6 visiting my grandparents for the summer and they drove us back to Virginia from Canada. On the way to the border I wanted McDonald’s or something like that. My grandparents wouldn’t get me any and I was salty af. We got to the border and they were asking typical questions. I have a different last name than my grandparents and the border guy asked how I knew them. I told the border guy “I have no idea who these people are.”
My parents had to drive from Virginia to Maine to pick me up……..
cant blame the guards for making sure but i hope Christmas was canceled for that year
Yes because a 6y old can foresee the bureaucratic consequences of this 'protest', and punishing a 6y old half a year later has been shown to be effective in some way or form SMH.
Load More Replies...According to Alphabet Inc. that's a thirteen hour drive. I assume that the grandparents were held in custody until the parents identified them as not being child abductors. Or do I not?
Wow, dumb kid. Creating serious problems for the grandparents over stupid bloody junk food.
He was 6. It was a dumb move, but I doubt he knew that he would create so much trouble
Load More Replies...That is kind of funny but hopet the grandparents didn't get into to much trouble.
LOL, I did something similar to an uncle. The night before he was making fun of my scratch n' sniff book, which I loved. He came to pick me up from daycare, and when they asked if I knew him, I said, "I don't know him, and I don't like him." My dad had to come get me after they threatened to call the cops.
I was sitting in my front yard singing nonsense out loud while playing with my toy cars.
“DIL DO DIL DO DIL DO DIL A DIL A DILLY DO 🎵”
My Mom came to the window and quietly said “Hey sweetie, try to sing something else okay?”.
When I worked in a department store, a mother was pushing her daughter in a stroller. The little girl was saying very loudly, "I'm a horse! I'm a horse." She could not pronounce the S.
As kids my brother and I thought we made up the word dildo. We used it like the word idiot to insult each other, as in "you're such a dildo". Mom heard us once and told us that we weren't allowed to say it anymore. She didn't say why. When I found out years later I couldn't stop laughing. She must have been dying trying not to crack up! :)
To be fair it does sound like an insult, I mean, dill brain and dimbo
Load More Replies...Changing my daughters diaper and she pees on me. I said loudly, you got your pee-ness all over me again. My mom ducks her head into the room, "her what now?" Oops.
So you should check out the song by the Horne Section, a song about the A-ness and the pea-ness
Load More Replies...My dad is an excavator, he drives big trucks. One day while we were out to dinner my toddler brother exclaimed: "Daddy is a big dumb f**k!" He meant, "My dad drives a big dump truck "
At least wasn't "My ding-a-ling, My ding-a-ling,I like to play with my ding-a-ling"
Hahaha, when I was like 8 or 9 we kids were at my aunt's house and of course fighting and being obnoxious. I called my cousin a dildo. My aunt calmly asked ,"do you know what that is?" I said "yeah, it's a pickle". Hehehe 🤣
Kids usually say and do all sorts of things without really understanding them. After all, when we are born, we’re essentially a nearly white sheet of paper, so we learn about the world and everything in it by experiencing it.
However, according to Carrie Shrier of the Michigan State University Extension, since we don’t start off knowing exactly what we should do, we imitate what we see around us. Usually, that involves people closest to us, like our family and peers, as well as things we see in our surroundings.
We grow up watching the world around us, and that is exactly how we learn all the essential skills, like brushing our teeth and picking up things, as well as speaking, social skills, and independence.
When I was a young girl, I used to watch professional wrestling with my older brothers. We also had to go to church (southern baptist). They make prayer lists for people and I raised my hand to ask that the Undertaker be put on the list so that he would win his upcoming match.
Terribly sorry that I have to reply to you, as I agree with you as a wrestling fan. Adz, it's spelt your.
Load More Replies...No wonder the Undertaker had a 21-match Wrestlemania winning streak! She must have been praying for him. Although I'd have to give her a bit of a talking too because I think she forgot to pray in 2014 when Brock Lesnar ended the streak... -_- XD (Kidding, of course)
🤣🤣🤣 This would have been something I would have done. I'd get mad when I couldn't watch it and had to go to a church event(no longer Christian) but was forced to go to church and I once told a Sunday school teacher I wish I could tombstone her bc she told me I had the devil in me. So I find this just hilarious 🤣
Omg! I just commented on another post that I was a weird little girl who loved Wrestlemania. I solute you, fellow oddball.
I thought every wrestler with long hair is all stringy and wet.
Load More Replies...
I was upset because my grandfather didn’t want to play army with me and he would get weird about it, almost angry. Found out later he was in Vietnam.
Someone should have told the grandchild privately.
I still think it's ridiculous that we let children play army. It just doesn't make sense to make war and violence the topic of children's play. Imagine if we did that for anything else: children playing rape by letting 1 barbie rape the other?
Some kids playing cowboys and Indians still creeps me out when you know what white people actually did to Native Americans. Imagine ‘playing’ genocide..
Load More Replies...Children perceive heavy topics like war through rose-colored glasses. That doesn't mean outright exposing them to distressing media is the solution, but at least teach them that there are reasons why they don't play particular games with others.
he played it IRL and that version of the game likely wouldnt have been as fun as OP thought
Whenever a government says "time to go fight and die for us politicians", say no.
Grandfather should have explained why; would've been a great history lesson.
That's not how PTSD (from what grandpa most likely suffered) works
Load More Replies...
I was raised LDS, so no alcohol allowed. When I was 8 or 9 years old I heard my mom (who converted to the faith when she married my dad) tell someone at our church that she didn't drink and never had. So I yelled, Yes you do! You do drink!
She got really embarrassed and kind of laughed and tried to explain to the person that I was just confused. I kept insisting she was lying. She made us leave, and when we got to the car she asked me why in the world I behaved that way.
So I proudly told her I'd seen her drink so many times- milk, juice, water, AND soda!
They should of taught him/her about different types of drinks and things like that
Load More Replies...I remember when I was about six screaming at my mom because she was drinking and driving. It was a Diet Pepsi.
hahahaha! that same thing always happened to me during health and safety day. was so confused as they told us to not smoke or drink. cue me gasping for water at the end of pe and the teachers begging me to drink water and me insisting that they told me not to drink.
I did this too, to my dad when I was 4... I became extremely irrate with him for "drinking and driving". He was drinking water. I had zero concept of what "drinking and driving " actually meant. It was a semi public spectacle that I'm sure he wishes to forget.
I don’t remember the details but my sister ended up telling a teacher that my dad drank a lot every day. My dad had to come to the school to explain he drank a lot *of water*… she was in high school at the time. >.<
As a parent you should know this can come up anytime and propably anyone should know in an instant what the child means by drinking.
But while parents may be more able to control what they teach their children, it becomes a bit more difficult when it comes to things like TV, and, as research quoted by Carrie Shrier shows, an average child spends roughly 3 hours a day watching it.
The same study showed that the majority of children aged 1-2 strongly imitated the behavior seen on television. For example, when the researchers split these kids into groups and showed one of them a video of a stranger taking a toy apart, almost all the kids watching it attempted to do the same, while most of those who saw a stranger simply playing didn’t.
When I was about five, I went through an entrepreneurial phase. I used to go around picking flowers out of the neighbors' flower beds, then ringing their doorbell and trying to sell them their own flowers.
No, it bore flowers. I’ll see myself out….
Load More Replies...My son and his cousin, about 7-8 each, decided to set up a sidewalk stand. Their product was rocks. Off the ground. Passersby thought it was so cute, the boys made about $75 and with their profits we took them to buy an inflatable raft with a little outboard motor, for camping. You could have knocked me over with a...never mind.
Oh my god, the scams I scammed when I was younger. I sold everything at some point in time. Slime, rocks, tomatoes… and people actually bought!
I actually tried to MAKE money as a child by trying to copy the pictures on banknotes onto blank paper with coloured pencils…I thought if I could draw accurately enough I could cut the “notes” out and spend them!
When I was 6/7 my pet mouse died. We buried it in the back yard. The next day my older cousin came to visit. I dug it up and put it back in the cage bc I thought she’d also like to pay her respects. My mom was like “No honey, it’s disrespectful. You have to let the dead be at peace.”.
whatever store these appear to be in, should know better that wire/barred flooring is not good for rats or mice. anyway, rip to ops lil mouse
Yeah, growing up, our various rodents over the years were kept in a tank with wood chips.
Load More Replies...I'd love a zombie version of my late dog. Her cuteness and goofyness combined with the bad a*s toughness of a zombie, that would be an awesome pet!
Load More Replies...I remember I was like 9/10 or so when my older sister's hamster died. I remember going into the garage to get a drink & seeing the hamster cage. Not knowing the hamster was dead, I grabbed the hamster & raced upstairs "MOM, SOMEONE FROZE CRACKER!" Being woken up to a frantic child shoving a dead hamster in your face sure is one doozy of a way to wake up.
I was around 6 and my brother 5 when he took our hamster out of its cage, the cat got hold and killed it. I thought it was a brilliant idea to put the hamster back in the cage so no one would notice... 35 years later and my mother still tells that story
I was walking into a gas station and a cop was walking out. he had a coffee in his hand and did what any reasonable person would do and reminded him that he had forgotten his donuts. i didnt realize for a while why my mom covered my mouth and apologized profusely.
Reminds me on how I wanted to fish for police with donuts or smthing. Looking back I think I thought police were monsters of gods lol
Load More Replies...I’m so confused. I know cops eat donuts but why was the mom embarrassed what am I missing
unrelated, but i took one 1 look at the picture and wanted the blue donut.
My sister with Downs syndrome oinked at a cop once while at Dairy Queen with my mom... Needless to say, it was awkward.
My dad is a retired cop, and when i was little we would hide hostess doughnuts in his lunch.
The story is more or less the same when it comes to saying rather than doing things. But, as per RaisingChildren.net.au, it is only at around 5-6 years old that children start to grasp what context is and that the same word can have several different meanings, as well as what a figure of speech is and how to use it.
A great example of this is the OP’s, u/Logical_Sweet_6624, story that they replied with to their own thread. When they were a kid in kindergarten, their mom was very concerned with her child making friends, so she would often ask if they played with anyone, to which they replied, “Sometimes I just like to play with myself.”
I slapped my grandma in the face while she was sleeping because I watched too many spanish telenovellas and wanted to know how it feels like to slap someone.
That lets video games off the hook for the old causing violence allegations.
I hope she slapped you back because she watches too much Jerry Springer.
This miiiight be a touch dark, my therapist was the one who pointed out this was wildly inappropriate lol. When I was about 8 or 9 we had this church function. It was a benefit or charity event of sorts and… you know those benefits where you pledge $25 and a kid has to run a bunch of laps and it’s $25/lap? Well it was like that… but with Jello.
Children aged 6-10 were wrestling in a kiddie pool of jello in the REQUIRED two piece swim suits. Yes, two pieces were required for “safety” reasons. I have a home video and everything. I always thought it was fun but after watching home videos since my mom passed I realized it was only girls and all the adults were men and like 5 women.
its probably too late to do anything but i'd hand that video to the cops
Utah has passed a law that there is no statute of limitations when it comes to sexual offences against children. IMO, every state should have that law.
Load More Replies...Please explain how two pieces are so much more safer. Who they hell made the rules?? It's so obvious!
Other than bathroom emergencies (as they are kids) there is no good excuse
Load More Replies...cmon, some religious people are really nice. An eye for an eye makes the world blind, man
Load More Replies...I get the sense of how it is gross of men watching children in two pieces but I feel like there's is something way bigger going on here that i do not understand
In former times (70s/80s) mud or jello wrestling was a thing done in trashy bars or clubs by bikini clad women. I believe men were encouraged to take bets on who would win.
Load More Replies...Turns out my dad did not know about my being baptised in the neighbours house pool when I was about 11. I turned 50 last week which is when he found out.
I used to search for "naked 13 year old girls" on Kazaa because, you know, I WAS 13 YEARS OLD! It makes perfect sense to find girls in my age group.
I'm thankful that the Internet was so young back then because looking back on it I'm horrified. I could've gotten myself or my parents in a s**tload of trouble.
And now I'll have to teach my own son that while, yes, being age appropriate makes sense, you can't do that.
Oh dear. The father would have some explaining to do if the Feds came...
The feds would definitely already consider that if there's children/teenagers in the house, they could be the one who searched for it.
Load More Replies...I knew an innocent, middle-aged lady who wanted to pick cherries in Young, NSW. You can imagine her surprise when she searched "Young Cherries"
You also have to be careful searching up Young NSW because you just *know* that autocorrect is changing that NSW to Nsfw
Load More Replies...And you didn't think for a second about how pictures of naked 13 years old girl would end up on the internet?
This happened to a friend of mine when we were teens.. Except when he was freshly 18 his mom brought the family computer in and now heis registered. And he was the nicest guy!
When daughters were maybe 8 and 9 years old, I won a gift certificate for D**k's Sporting Goods. I told them I'd take them there and they could spend it. They wanted to find the nearest location, so they got on Yahoo, typed " d***s" in the search bar, and hit enter. " Daddy, daddy, come look!" I had to explain that specificity in search terms is important. As adults now with children of their own, we still laugh about that.
Bored Panda reached out to the OP, who was very surprised by the amount of attention that their question received online and was glad to share some additional commentary with us. According to them, the way their answer sounded most likely didn’t catch their mother’s attention or was ignored since she was a lot more focused on her kid not playing with anyone.
Yet, saying something like that could really raise some eyebrows and attract some side-looks since, the way we interpret it, it’s definitely not the most appropriate thing to randomly say out loud. However, to a child who still takes everything quite literally, it is pretty difficult to grasp what is wrong with it.
I have a cousin with autism. At the time I was about 6 or 7, he was 4-5. I didn't know the slightest bit about autism at the time, nor have I encountered anyone with it at that point, so seeing him and how he would interact with me and with our relatives had me confused as to why he was acting and behaving so different. I started asking my uncle and his wife (his parents) questions like "Why is he like that?" and "Why isn't he acting normally?"
I guess I sounded really rude, because on the drive home, my parents were the most furious they have ever been with me, telling me why would I ask questions like that, did I have an ounce of shame, etc. I was mortified and eventually reduced to tears because I had thought I commited a grave sin so bad that no amount of praying would get me forgiveness (christian upbringing) 😆
Looking back, I guess I did sound rude, but it would have massively helped if my parents told me about autism and what it really is beforehand, so that I could've touched on the subject a little more carefully. Today I have a good relationship with my cousin and my uncle and aunt, and I think they understood that I didn't really mean any malice, and was just a genuinely curious kid, so its no big issue.
Parents should not get angry if they did a lousy job providing information beforehand. Maybe that was due to their insecurities?
These are the same type parents that cringe when their kids ask about my braces ( crutches that go around forearms) when i would be perfectly happy talking and explaining. Lets not pretend disabilities dont exist.
Load More Replies...My daughter is autistic and I get that question all the time from other kids and it's definitely not out of malice just a child's curiosity. I'd rather a kid ask inappropriate questions than them become an adult who ignores my kid out of ignorance
Exactly I coach little kids and a lot of kids say things like, "Why are you wearing headphones?" Or "Why do your hands shake so much?" But much more blunt and rude. I actually prefer it to the adults who ask my parents behind their hands as if I'm 7 and not 17.
Load More Replies...I'm autistic, and my adopted daughter is also autistic. I would be a little surprised by these kinds of questions, but all it takes is a quick 5 minute sit down and a brief explanation of what autism is. For kids who sometimes ask, I usually phrase it as "we have something called autism/aspergers, it means our brains work a little differently than yours" , I know it's not the best explanation but it works for small children who then tend to just shrug it off. It's when they get a little older that things unfortunately can be complicated with bullying etc, especially when you are high functioning but still struggle with social things etc.
A friend of mine has a child with autism and the neighbour children know all about it. They ask questions and people answer and children play together.
I've always found that if you answer children's questions about "sensitive" subjects honestly, and don't make them feel bad for being curious, that those children will go on to be more empathetic. When I had breast cancer, I was going stir crazy after a few months. GHubby agreed to take me for a (very) short outing. We hadn't been in the store 5 minutes when a little boy came & asked why I didn't have hair. His mother looked mortified, but I answered, trying to keep things on his level. Afterwards, mom tried to apologize, but I welcomed his curiosity. Being allowed to ask questions (& not being chastised), cancer was now less scary. He knew it was ok to ask, but not everyone like to talk about it. She and I kept in touch thru FB. One day she told me one of his classmates had cancer & that he and 2 other kids were the only ones not bothered by it.
What??? A christian family laying guilt and shame on a 6 year old that they failed to properly educate and inform? Then flushing a genuinely teachable moment away. You don't f*****g say. I swear to God if religion wasn't so widely accepted it would (SHOULD anyway) be f****** child abuse.
When I was in like 6th grade I had a friend who probably was a might bit autistic. When we dropped him off at home one day my mom asked is something wrong with him. Not verbatim but essentially what she said. I was like nope! It was the 90s and we just never heard of such things.
That's what people seem to forget that autism is a newer medical diagnosis. It didn't exist for us growing up in the 80s /90s or before. I'm thinking back to those years and sure enough, I can think of a few that are probably autistic.
Load More Replies...I was once going to an air show with my step-mother, her friend and her friend's daughter. We passed a house and SM pointed out a house, and I proudly said, "Isn't that where the racist lives?" She was furious, and the rest of the day was awkward.
When I was around 8 years old and on a family vacation, we stopped at a random restaurant so my stepfather could use the bathroom. I told him “Don’t choke the chicken!” I was thinking that meant to not clog the toilet. I got yelled at by my mother, and wondered why she was so mad about it. Years later I realized what it really meant.
For those confused on this the saying used for don't j€rk off... So yeah they told their stepfather not to j€rk off in the bathroom
I don't get all that getting mad at your children for saying stuff they obviously don't ment or even understand in that way.
Never heard that phrase before.. Had to think about it for a couple of seconds before realize what it meant.
Pooped at my grandparents house and ran out of TP, used the sink hand towel instead and threw it in the trash. Five minutes later grandad was all WTF.
Anytime you have kids in your house, you need to make sure there's enough TP on the roll.
Simplest thing is just to keep a box of tissues within reach of toilet, for the times when the extra TP runs out before you expect.
Load More Replies...Why not just politely tell the child what to do in case that happens again?
One time I was in a major city and had to to poop. So pulled in a BK real quick to use the bathroom and didn't check to see if they had toilet paper. A place like that you would think that they would keep up on something like tha. Nope, no toilet paper. Had to drive home with a dirty butt.
Slightly better than using the cardboard tube. Hello do you yell for paper at home? Why not at your grands?
Lol. I never noticed the bin beside the toilet at my own home, but somehow noticed it at my grandmother’s house. I made the assumption that Grandma didn’t want toilet paper going down the toilet so the bin was for used toilet paper….
Hey mate, desperate times call for desperate measures. I don't blame you.
But in the end, almost every grown person also understands that children don’t do or say these things intentionally. We were all kids once, and it’s more than likely that we all have some stories of this kind. That is a natural part of growing up, and only by doing something can we learn to do it properly.
What did you think about these stories? Did you have any experiences like these yourself? Share it all in the comments below!
I think I was partly feral. I remember on a camping trip I was playing frisbee (I was 8 or so). It went astray and some hapless soul picked it up. I was afraid he was going to steal it so I picked up the biggest stick I could and said 'GIVE ME BACK MY FRISBEE!'. I remember the guy going 'Ok kid, here's your frisbee, take it easy.'.
I would get along with that kid. I can be very catlike at times since I like getting my head scratched, laying in the sun, and doing that big yawn stretch thing.
At least it wasn't a red swingline stapler they lost... That would end badly.
Somewhere around 5? Years old, my parents hosted Thanksgiving. At the table, one of the adults asked if there was anything new with me. I responded "my dad picks his boogers and eats them". I still clearly recall the shocked silence.
I'm 56 now.
That hopefully taught your dad to not do that where anyone can see him.
I caught a 13 year old doing that. I said next time go use the bathroom.
Actually there are benefits if eati g boogers. Yes,I knowing is gross.
Watching I think Prince of Egypt? In school in like 5th grade, and as the woman was setting Moses in the basket she put her middle finger on his head. I knew that holding up your middle finger was rude, but I didn't have a name for the gesture. So I said 'why is she fingering the baby?' only loud enough for my friend to hear. But the kids in front of me heard and one spun around and called me disgusting. I didn't get it then but like a year or more later that popped into my head and I wanted nothing more than to curl up and die. Still do kinda.
Don't you love when a cringe moment from the past just floats into your head randomly
But the word fingering also means touching something with your fingers, it isn't necessarily sexual.
Yeah, but there are lots of words that have sexual and normal meanings (ride, finger, fist, back shot, etc) and most people think of the sexual one first
Load More Replies...upvote for the prince of egypt!!!!!!1!! love that movie, i've memorized the whole script since i was 5, love the soundtrack :D
When our youngest was 9, we got a new puppy (first family dog). I got called into school a week later when he had to write up his "Our week this week" in his school diary. He had written that we, as a family, had been 'dogging' ...
When I was real young, a friend and I were outside and I noticed the gas cap on a car. I took the gas cap off and was wondering how deep the hole was there so my friend and I started pouring in all the dirt and that we could find and actually managed to fill it up. The only saving grace was that we didn’t put the gas cap back on so when the guy came to get in his car, he noticed what we did. My parents were pissed. My father had to have the car towed to a gas station where they had to take the tank off to get all the dirt out. If he tried to start the car he would’ve ruined it. The funny thing was that there were a lot of people walking around on that block and that not one person stopped us.
Nobody stopping them isn't really funny. It's not hard to talk to kids, asking them in a friendly tone what they are doing.
Would not have ruined the car. the fuel filter would have clogged and stopped running. It is specifically designed for that exact purpose.
Came here to say exactly this. With that much dirt it would clog very quickly and there would be no fuel flow, so the engine would stop and not restart.
Load More Replies...When I was a kid, I had some small metal cylinders which I was arranging in the expansion cracks of concrete. Except they were too big to fit properly, so I got the idea to hammer them flat so they would. These cylinders turned out to be bullets. And just now, 50+ years later, I'm asking the question, why TF did we have bullets?
When we were kids our parents planned out a cross-country road trip one summer (in the wood-paneled Country Squire station wagon, of course!). The morning we were scheduled to leave, my four y.o. brother decided to “help” by filling the gas tank. Using the garden hose. Our trip was delayed.
In the US, many gas stations have repair shops.
Load More Replies...
I was probably 5 or 6, a family friend's wife had just passed, and I hadn't really had any death talk yet, so I asked mum where do dead people go, and she explained to me about coffins and tombs and so on.
Fascinated, I sketched a drawing of the guy's wife inside of the tomb, and went to show him. Luckily my mum stopped me at the right time. I couldn't understand why I wasn't supposed to show him.
My cousin died from an OD last November. As soon as we get to the funeral my 5yo daughter walks right up to my aunt and asks "are you sad your son is dead." I brace for the breakdown and I'm getting ready to apologize when she just starts laughing and saying things like " out of the mouths of babes" Turns out her complete earnestness and innocence was exactly what she needed at that moment
Cringe should start at the age where you should know better. Kids can't be expected to know stuff.
My favorite cartoon growing up was The Angry Beavers. They had an episode where they record a smash hit called "Beaver Fever." I can vividly remember being maybe 5 years old and singing, "HE'S GOT THE BEAVER FEVER, BEAVER FEVER" at the top of my lungs in public and my mom struggling to shush me and me not knowing why.
I was so upset when they cancelled The Angry Beavers. My mother was so happy.
🤣🤣🤣 I absolutely loved that show but yeah it definitely had adult humor in it. I also may have sung that song in public too lmao
I was on a high school CHURCH scavenger hunt...and assigned to look for an "eager beaver." Asked a strange guy at the mall if he knew where one was...and got the oddest look. Now I know why, years later. (Yes, my face is still red. What was the youth group sponsor thinking?!?)
Woodstock happened when I was 2, and my dad got the record the next year and played it a lot. There was a thing on it called the Fish Cheer, on account of the band Country Joe and the Fish doing it: "Gimme an F! Gimme a U!" etc. I started the Fish Cheer in a college bookstore when I was 3. Wasn't allowed to finish
Beaver fever is a nickname for something that makes you sick. What organism
I would suck on the inside of my own arm, giving myself hickeys. I was bored one day in the bathroom and zoned out, and came out with a huge bruise on my arm. In a public gas station. My mother was SUPER F*****G ALARMED when she saw me, and I never realized why. I was just embarrassed to admit I did it myself.
Oh I used to do that and give myself hickeys on my hands when I was going to sleep.
My little sibling did this too, and our older sister had to explain to mom that we weren't hitting them :/
Load More Replies...More explanation is needed. I think I might just be tired and groggy and generally it's hard to what's the word... anyway my head hurts too so please help
I think the mom thought the OP was hit while in the bathroom maybe assulted.
Load More Replies...
My little brother used to come in my room and tell me, his big sister, "Wakey, wakey. Hands off snakey" 😂😂.
But what does the average boy child know about female anatomy? or many of the adults for that matter.
Load More Replies...That's the only place I've heard this, and I'm 70 yrs old. I loved that show!
Load More Replies...Totally innocent, as sister doesn't have a snakey. Do the children have an older brother in the army
When I was 7 or 8, I was at the grocery store with my mom. She asked me to help her unload groceries on the conveyor belt. I, a young elementary white boy, proceeded to yell YESSUH MASSAH!
I don't even know where I originally heard that. I just remember not realizing that was probably not something I should say, then seeing my mom's face and realizing that was probably not something I should say at all ever in any context.
So that would be a thing a black slave would say to his white master. Yes, master. Yessuh Massah.
Load More Replies...It's Very Racist I can't imagine how humiliated his mum felt.
Load More Replies...It was funny at first, but now it's just annoying.
Load More Replies...My brother and I thought it was funny to call 999 and immediately hang up. I remember about an hour later 2 policemen turned up and had a strict talking with my dad who was utterly confused until he connected the dots.
I remember being very young (5?) and my mom accidentally set a dishtowel on fire while cooking dinner. I raced to the phone and called 911 (emergency services in the US.) My mom threw the towel into the sink, saw me on the phone, and grabbed it out of my hand and hung it up. A minute later the 911 operator called back and my dad picked up and had to explain that they had a well-trained child who freaked out a little too hard about a burning dishtowel XD At least I didn't get in trouble with my parents or emergency services.
I'm Australian and as a kid thought 911 was the emergency number because most tv I saw was American shows and movies.
Yeah lol And with Air crash investigations a lot of the Australian air crashes result in ambulances, which read 911 instead of 000 :/
Load More Replies...I'm more concerned about the fact that it took an hour for the police to respond
If you ever call 999 by mistake stay on the line. It's much better to explain over the phone that you didn't mean to call than leave emergency services wondering
My cellphone was accidentally dropped into a cup of Dr. Pepper while driving home with my kids. Apparently, my phone thought IT was having an emergency, so called 911! My cell was connected to the car speaker system and I was completely caught off guard when suddenly there were officers asking if I was okay.
Load More Replies...Depending upon how old, a child might well not know better. I had to explain to an adult that repeatedly pressing 9 for an outside line on my desk phone with a headset plugged in was in fact not the best idea in the world, having just fielded a call back from the emergency services. Utter plonker!
What reason did not let kids play with cell phones even if they are not in service.
When I was in kindergarten, my mom would ask me everyday if I played with someone, sometimes I did sometimes I didn’t, so once I said “sometimes I just like to play with myself” looking back, it’s Hilarious.
why are u being downvoted so freaking much?? have an upvote
Load More Replies...I'm sorry my joke has upset so many I am in dark low mood so thought I could make ppl laugh I have taken note and will no longer try with ppl
I'm sorry you're feeling bad. Hopefully tomorrow will be better.
Load More Replies...I used to work with elementary school kids. Everyday we started the afternoon asking everyone what they wanted to do. A seven year old boy once said he just wants to be alone and play with his snake. My coworkers and I nearly died from not laughing loudly; later we saw he indeed had a wooden toy snake in his backpack.
only once because mother corrected you by telling you the right phrase is by yourself.
Once again, this isn't even funny anymore. Just stop.
Load More Replies...
Idk what compelled me to do it but I would just put my clothes in the toilet after I was done bathing. Made zero sense to me, underdeveloped child brain went brrrr I guess.
when I was a kid, I once flushed a pair of socks down the toilet, then realised what I'd actually done and cried about it for ages. I liked those socks. :(
I use to put all my capri sun pouches in a wok in the cabinet! It remember my mom was o confused to why I did it and all I know is I felt bad for them and didn’t want to throw them away
Please don't hate on me for this as I was a kid! And certainly was disciplined for it at the time.
I took a s**t on my neighbours roof because dad was hogging the toilet for too long...
From OP on Reddit: "Climbed on the fence and got up on top of the garden shed to get up there. As for why neighbors roof, his roof was lower than ours. The neighbours came over and told my father what I'd done (after id done it about three times). I then got a good hiding (kick up the a**e) while the neighbour watched and nodded his head in satisfaction. My parents asked me why I did it as well. I'd chose the roof because no one really looks up there and I didn't want anyone to find my poo"
Load More Replies...Most logical place to resort to. I l mean, where else could you go and remain unseen?
Oh, boy, I just envisioned them sitting on the edge of the chimney!
Load More Replies...That was your dad's fault for selfishly thinking he could just avoid you in the toilet. He should have been disciplined.
When I was in the service, the night before he was scheduled to muster out, some guy who had been reduced in rank by our captain broke into the captain's office and s**t on his desk. The perp left and we caught H**l.
Made a prank call on random people. My brother and I would say something like "This is the police, you're under arrest", and then giggled like idiots before we hang up the phone. Those poor people. Sorry y'all.
Oh this was a typical Friday night. Break out the phone book! Let's start with all the Js!
Is your refrigerator running? Well you better go catch the darn thing! HAAAAA*click*
Load More Replies...LoL, I wonder if kids today still do prank calls or is that a thing from the past?
Well, one time a boy on my bus called Papa Johns and asked for his papa named John, and asked Burger King for the king. This is one of the kids who started the hot sauce incident, I think.
Load More Replies...Every little kid did prank calls if we thought we could get away with it
We use to call and say “ this is Mrs. Terry from down the street and I think your chickens are in my yard again “
I had a birthday party when I was like 8 or 10. One of my friends had a gnarly amount of ear wax so I grabbed a Q tip and told him he had a lot of ear wax as I handed it to him in front of everybody.
Me, age 6, at the backyard cookout. I was handed a burnt hot dog to eat (on the grill too long). I proceeded to call it a n*dog. I didn't understand why everyone around me got upset. I must have absorbed it from my dad (huge racist, in spite of being an Arab immigrant).
I've never heard this word before- and I'm not just joking about the censoring I've actually never seen it so now I'm confuzzled as heck. I'm assuming it's a slur for African Americans tho?
Yes it's a slur for African Americans unfortunately I have family that use that term and they wonder why I don't talk to them 🤦🏻♀️
Load More Replies...When I was a kid there was a rhyme you used to pick if someone was "it" and it had the N word in it and when I was a kid I thought it meant a sprit or a fairy or a goblin, some little magical creature like that. I didn't realise it was a racial slur till I was an adult. What an idiot.
Nah, you're not an idiot, same kinda thing happened to me because my dad used that word. He used to say n*****-rigged, so I did the same, even as an adult, until I learned that it's racist. But yeah, I totally felt like an idiot and a*****e, especially since I'd used it talking to a family I used to do housecleaning for. :(
Load More Replies...
So my parents couldn't afford daycare - my dad was still in college and my mom worked part time, so it made more sense for me to stay home and all that. They had friends who had kids my age, so that's where I got my early social skills.
When I was 5 or 6, one kid was talking about how he went to daycare. I said, very loudly, that "I don't go to daycare because my parents want to spend time with ME."
My parents were mortified then, but now it's one of the funniest stories they've got from my childhood.
When I was six, I'd check out my dad's dirty magazines like it was the most normal thing in the world.
There are NO very good hiding places when you have kids at home.
Load More Replies...Haha, I did the same. Kids are curious and dad didn't hide them well enough for a nosy kid like me
It was at the bottom of his wardrobe, if anyone wants to know. No idea why I ever checked in there
Load More Replies...Wait, that's NOT normal? Is it also not normal to start a business as a 10 year old where you charge your school chums a fee to watch your dads pornos when he's still at work? lol
When I was 6, I took one of my Dad's Playboy magazines, put it in my backpack and brought it to school. Luckily it never made it to the school, I of course, was showing the other kids on my bus and this caught my bus drivers attention. Crazy thing, that I found out later in life, the older man who was my bus driver, when I was in kindergarten or first grade, was nice enough to just confiscate the magazine and told my parents, while dropping me off, at my bus stop. This bus driver was also the same guy, who played Santa Claus at the mall and I have a picture of me from when I was about 1 or 2 years old, sitting on his lap.
I did the same thing with my grandfather's - I think it was pretty normal.
When I was little, my best friend and I used to eat honeysuckle off the bushes next to my house. One day, the neighbor's kid came out and started yelling at us to get out. I argued back at her and we kept on doing it. A very long time later, I learned that it was actually their property.
I didn't understand how lots worked, and I thought that any and all land that touched any side of your house belonged to you.
I used to do the same thing with cherry blossoms and some flowers our neighbor has in their front yard- I didn't take that many though, like one a month. There were also these raspberries we would suck on to get this amazing flavor... we never swallowed them though
Oooo I used to do this, it's so good! Until my mother told me to stop, people might spray them with pesticides 🤢
That's exactly what my mom had to tell me. Only eat the stuff from their property bc pesticides
Load More Replies...used to do this too, it was in there yard but over hanged into the street, they didn't mind that we got honeysuckle off that area{ it wasn't the "street street" it was a culdesac and it was on the side walk}
This isn't so bad, kids don't understand property lines and things like that. We had a plum tree growing behind us as kids in the neighbors yard, I just assumed it was shared and we ate our fill. Neighbor didn't mind but it didn't register it wasn't technically mine.
Smacking women’s butts. I’m talkin everywhere. Boyyyy, I was a bad a*s lil 4 year old, they had to nip that in the bud quick.
My nephew was around that age and when he went grocery shopping in the store he would say "Hey baby!" to any younger woman he saw. In his mind that's how you greeted women bc his dad(my brother) would come home and say "Hey baby" to his mom. I'm sure that's what happened here he saw his dad smack his moms butt and thought that's what you were supposed to do lol
For a second I got confused... I ignored the "nephew" part and thought you did -You know what- with ur brother... SWEET HOME ALABAMA
Load More Replies...This is an example where spanking would convey a relevant message.
I may or may not have fondled the bewbage of literally every one of my older brothers girlfriends when I was like 5 or 6. To be fair, he encouraged me to do it, because at 13, he thought it was hilarious...but...clearly that was just all around not good.
Robbing small businesses blind of their candy.
My older sister told me those bulk candies were free samples. So while I did steal I didn't know it! I blame my sister lol!
Load More Replies...
I stole a roasted chicken leg from a pan full of baked potatoes. I took it outside and left it on the porch. Not sure what my thought process was. We were supposed to have lunch so I would have eaten a piece of it anyway. I was staying at my relatives house. I acussed the cat. On that farm I also played house with a local kid and we kissed. I was not older than 8.
We are innocent! Even when we're guilty, we're innocent!
I was about 5...so was my friend. We were supposed to be playing in the sprinkler outside, instead we were playing show me yours I'll show you mine. And got BUSTED! I kinda knew why, we were hiding after all, but I didn't UNDERSTAND why.
When my son was little, we taught him all the appropriate terms for his body. I was pushing him about in the cart in the grocery store when he was 3-4, when he proudly announced to everyone in the bread aisle: "I have a P E N I S!" Yes, little guy. Yes you do. 🤦♀️
My cousin was with her aunt waiting in line at the grocery store, she casually looked up to her aunt said pretty loud: Aunt Mary, you really have big boobs you know! Lots of chuckles from the other customers
When I was six or seven, we had watched "The Legend of Billie Jean" and there's a scene where Yeardley Smith gets her first period and asks "When Do I Get My Diaphram?". Finding her voice funny (she voices Lisa Simpson) and not knowing what that meant, I went around repeating it. My mother was horrified, also I'm a boy.
When I was pretty young (maybe before 1st grade), my parents needed a babysitter, and that was one of very few times I was babysat. The older couple they left me with were very proper, religious people. I was pretty high energy and had obviously worn them out to the point that they said to me "Well, you're a pain in the neck, aren't you?". I replied "No I'm not, I'm a pain in the a*s"...since I was told that often by my Dad. I remember the immediate silence followed by refrained laughter.
I was in 4th grade and somehow belly buttons came up and how what’s left of the umbilical cord falls off infants after a while. Having proudly just become an uncle, I remarked that the leftover foreskin comes off too if a baby is circumcised. I was very disappointed when my teacher didn’t appreciate this bit of key insight.
When I was little, I decided I wanted to learn German. I learned several words, one of which was the German word for “fat” (d**k). Went around calling my brother a d**k (for no reason; he was a perfectly normal weight, probably on the skinny side) for the better part of a day before someone stopped me. Learned what it meant years later lol
When my husband was a little boy he was mad at his mom for some reason or another. They were driving somewhere when she got pulled over for speeding, and he began screaming that she was kidnapping him. My husband was so convincing that the officer took them to the station and called his stepdad to come pick them up and bring proof that this was her son.
I was about 7 yrs old and it was the last day of school, so the seniors dress up in costumes and party all day (I live in Denmark) This one guy was dressed as Hitler (pretty offensive when I think about it), but I did not know who he was at that time, but I found the swastika symbol quite cool. So I got home and painted swastikas all over - the real Nazi one, with a white circle and red background. My mom came home from work and was mortified and told me please don't draw that again and told me the story about WW2
When my son was little, we taught him all the appropriate terms for his body. I was pushing him about in the cart in the grocery store when he was 3-4, when he proudly announced to everyone in the bread aisle: "I have a P E N I S!" Yes, little guy. Yes you do. 🤦♀️
My cousin was with her aunt waiting in line at the grocery store, she casually looked up to her aunt said pretty loud: Aunt Mary, you really have big boobs you know! Lots of chuckles from the other customers
When I was six or seven, we had watched "The Legend of Billie Jean" and there's a scene where Yeardley Smith gets her first period and asks "When Do I Get My Diaphram?". Finding her voice funny (she voices Lisa Simpson) and not knowing what that meant, I went around repeating it. My mother was horrified, also I'm a boy.
When I was pretty young (maybe before 1st grade), my parents needed a babysitter, and that was one of very few times I was babysat. The older couple they left me with were very proper, religious people. I was pretty high energy and had obviously worn them out to the point that they said to me "Well, you're a pain in the neck, aren't you?". I replied "No I'm not, I'm a pain in the a*s"...since I was told that often by my Dad. I remember the immediate silence followed by refrained laughter.
I was in 4th grade and somehow belly buttons came up and how what’s left of the umbilical cord falls off infants after a while. Having proudly just become an uncle, I remarked that the leftover foreskin comes off too if a baby is circumcised. I was very disappointed when my teacher didn’t appreciate this bit of key insight.
When I was little, I decided I wanted to learn German. I learned several words, one of which was the German word for “fat” (d**k). Went around calling my brother a d**k (for no reason; he was a perfectly normal weight, probably on the skinny side) for the better part of a day before someone stopped me. Learned what it meant years later lol
When my husband was a little boy he was mad at his mom for some reason or another. They were driving somewhere when she got pulled over for speeding, and he began screaming that she was kidnapping him. My husband was so convincing that the officer took them to the station and called his stepdad to come pick them up and bring proof that this was her son.
I was about 7 yrs old and it was the last day of school, so the seniors dress up in costumes and party all day (I live in Denmark) This one guy was dressed as Hitler (pretty offensive when I think about it), but I did not know who he was at that time, but I found the swastika symbol quite cool. So I got home and painted swastikas all over - the real Nazi one, with a white circle and red background. My mom came home from work and was mortified and told me please don't draw that again and told me the story about WW2
