Woman Hands Husband Divorce Papers After Him Brushing Off His Mom’s Insults Ends In Violence
In a functional family, people strive to create an environment in which everyone feels safe and respected.
However, as Redditor OkOrganization9552 and his wife were getting ready to welcome their first child into the world, the dynamic in theirs shifted. The man’s mother started exhibiting increasingly hostile behavior toward his partner, injecting more and more tension into their everyday life.
He detailed everything in a candid post on the subreddit r/AITAH, hoping that its members would help him make sense of the situation and would offer an unbiased opinion on his own response to it.
Image credits: sofiiashunkina / envato (not the actual photo)
Image credits: RDNE Stock project / pexels (not the actual photo)
Image credits: OkOrganization9552
People who got familiar with the whole ordeal thought that the man could’ve handled things way better
Image credits: shotprime / envato (not the actual photo)
After his story went viral, the wife shared her own version of what happened
Image credits: MART PRODUCTION / pexels (not the actual photo)
Image credits: [deleted]
The woman has had way more supporters than her husband
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I don't understand "I need space NOW" so I'll wait while my wife packs up all kinds of baby supplies. You need space, you walk out the door.
That was my thought. I understand that he is in shock, but if he needs to process, that means that he needs to step away.
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You do not tell your wife, let alone your post-partum wife AND your child to leave your house. If you want space, you go.
If he'd gone and cooled off, things may have been different, but kicking out his wife and child showed hisbtrue colors. Goodnfornher for getting the divorce.
@Ivona ha ... Looks like we found the psycho mother's bp account
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It's odd that his wife's punch set him off but his mother slapping her didn't?
I doubt the father was the only abusive parent.
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When I first read the first part of his side of the story where he said his mom was being clingy.... and then continued being clingy... and he didn't put a stop to it then, I knew where this was headed. Momma's boy wasn't willing to stand up to her, and now he's paying for it. I do think that his past trauma is something they could have explored together if they wanted to reconcile, but I understand her reaction. If he needed space, then he needs to leave, not kick out his wife and baby. Crazy reaction.
I hope she gets everything. The house, alimony, and damages from that Elizabeth Báthory of a "mother in law". What a pathetic cis hetero man-child.
Please don't insult Elizabeth Bathory like that. She was the first to defend women in abusive relationships and was difamed by political rivals AND the church for being a woman in a position of power.
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Okay, this is a little off topic. I have read so many posts on BP where folks talk about cooking a certain number of "portions" of food. This is so strange to me. When I cook, I make sure there's enough for everyone, but not EXACTLY enough. There are almost always leftovers.
Think of it this way - you make a lasagna. It serves 9 to 10. You are having four people over so that’s six people to feed. Lots of food right with plenty of seconds, right? So everybody eats and whoever wants seconds has them, usually half a piece. But you didn’t account for someone wanting three full portions so really, you are serving the equivalent of nine people and suddenly your lasagna that serves 9 to 10 is very tight.
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Went through something similar. My partners mom loved me for the first three years. Then her married lover died, and she moved in with us full time. She flipped. She took our bedroom, wouldn't allow me to cook, made comments about my 'laziness' (I worked nights), and refused to speak English around me. I told my partner about her behavior, and she started pretending I wasn't there. One morning she came into our bedroom and threw a pot of cold water on me. She called me every name in the book. When I tried (naked) to get away, followed me screaming. He just stood there with wide eyes and said nothing. Five years of love immediately gone. I moved the next day.
Partner should have told beatch she couldn't have your bedroom, and you should have put a lock on the door. Not blaming you, though.
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You don't tell a woman with a brand new baby that she can afford to skip a meal. These make feel alright for being single and happyish.
When you decided to get married! Didn't you agree to love, honor, and protect? Well you lied! During that time where was the love, the honor, and the protection?! Why did you get married when you are a Mama's Boy! Your Mom will as it seems to be the first Woman in your life. You should have never gotten married! "He who has found a wife finds a good thing! You were supposed to let your MOM go and cling to your Wife! Please get some therapy for Your Mom issues. If not you will be a Mama's Boy and Not a Man!
Abusive behavior towards a DIL, right after she becomes pregnant? Sons inability to set boundaries with his mother and defend his wife? Well look at that. It's our old friend emotional incest again! The wife needed out and I'm glad for her. She's right. Her ex-husband NEEDS therapy I doubt his father was the only abusive parent in the family. There needs to be more acknowledgement of emotional incest and support for victims that are predominantly male. The devouring mother is an ancient symbol of toxic motherhood for a reason.
If I say what I want to say, BP will ban me for life, so I'll just say, 'I hope she doesn't come back to that...mmm...excuse for a man & and his birth giver.'
Deck the MIL, kick the baby daddy in the happy sack, send the overweight child to Weight Watchers, and live your best life.
You needed to ' process " what just happened ? Are you kidding ? What a childish response. Your spontaneous action should have been to comfort your wife.
Dear wife, just so you know, we all 100% support you! And I do not think for 1 hot busted moment, anyone believed your ex husbands’ tale of woe! It was “ em me me me me “ from the start! I would’ve punched her also! Wonder what his sister was doing? Also , I bet, pretty traumatized by both her deceased dad as well as her mother! Grandma may be over feeding the older grandchild, in a round anout way, to protect her from all men. Who wants to marry or date “ a fat girlfriend or woman” in her mind… but with her state of trauma also, it’s back aspwards, and she is psychologically messed up, likely forever. She definitely needs meds.
Wife is best out of that family. I was involved in a family like that with my ex, and it didn't stop until years after the divorce. She doesn't want to bring her daughter up around people like that and she needs to ensure through the courts that the grand mother is never allowed around the child because she sounds like she would hurt tge child to spite the mother
Make sure the custody agreement explicitly bars MIL from any contact with your little girl. She hates you, how do you think she’s going to treat your child? No being in the same room, house, car, park, or eventually, school. No surprise visits when Dad has custody. Get away from these abusive morons! Good luck.
His custody should be alone and supervised at all times. No overnights, no vacation visits, nothing.
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Lol, he thinks he can get her back. Should have manned up earlier and not thrown your wife and child out of their house. She made a great decision, she gets to divorce his milquetoast a*s and his mother.
With how stupid he sounded, I cringed so much. His poor ex-wife!!! I feel so bad for her! And her child. She deserves someone better!! Her ex-husband is the scum of his mother's weight-gaining soup.
The end is just a joke, btw. No offense intended.
Load More Replies... It's obvious that mommy realized that her son (OP) was not coming back to her when DIL became pregnant. OP should have kicked everyone out except his wife and baby, and he should have taken a walk around the block if he needed "space". Then, he should have groveled to his wife and apologized for allowing this beatch of his mother to abuse her for so long. Make sure there are good locks on the doors so beatch/mom can't get in. I feel incredibly sorry for this new mom and her baby and I wish her a great life going forward.
I'm SO glad that poor wife divorced him + that reddit tore him a new one. :) From the wife's account of that whole disaster-of-a-marriage + that MIL!! Sheesh!! I would've divorced him a long time ago, def. B-4 I got pregnant. Good on you, OP's soon-2-B ex. You now have a better life ahead of you. P.S. Please advise your ex to get counseling - he needs help.
so, she called his wife fat, and then physically hit her, and then went all shocked Pikachu face when the wife hit her back?
Glad you knocked her on her bùtt. Actually amusing to see that happen to a bully. Sorry you had to go through that. Keep your head up. Wish my first MIL did something that stupid. Hope things get better. Husband now you know how not to have a good marriage. You have a textbook case never do that. Your mom needs mental help. That comes from a crazy person trust me.
There is no mention of the age of the baby (unless I missed it) and I never gave birth, but I can imagine that region being tender. I would have responded with an uppercut too as a reflex. From the description of hubby, the wife was ready to say she was sorry... Going against the grain, I do have some sympathy for the guy, probably a PTSD reaction. Not agreeing with his actions, but yes therapy is overdue and it is now upon his wofe to ensure the baby's safety as he failed to do so.
2 months and it usually stops hurting after the first month or so
Load More Replies... Someone made the comment about anyone eating three servings of her lasagna, as she served it with salad and bread. Well, a young woman” starved” for affection would consume that amount of food. Food soothes, when there is loving kindness and affection, missing in a home… sometimes.
Bet his mom is thrilled at how she got her son "back." That mom is bad news. That boy wrecked his marriage because of his evil mother. What a fool.
Your baby needs to be protected from Daddy's side of the family. Dad should have only supervised visitation. I hope that you filed assault charges against that woman as that will help you in court. As for dad, TAH, he needs to grow up, get some therapy and grow past his abusive childhood. It wasn't only his dad that was abusive, his mom is showing her abusive traits now with all of her grandkids and some of her kids.
Feel sorry for the wife. How can your husband dismiss the antagonistic behaviour of his mom and even put you guys in the same room together? How is that ok to allow your mom to diss your wife? smh. Totally the AH
I hope she takes him for everything he has so ha can go crawling home to mommy and die miserable and alone and still holding mommy's apron strings. The one and only time I ever had an outburst with my ex was when he came home late in a bad mood and went to grab the baby off my chest, mad I was cuddling my son. I warned him off. Three times I warned him. Told him you never touch a child when you are angry. He wouldn't stop. So, I kicked him across the room and into the litterbox. I told him do for s drive, go for a walk, go jerk off, whatever he needed to do, but to get out until he calmed down. He came at the baby and I again, and I nearly killed him by throwing a hammer at him. That was when he realized I was really going to hurt him if he didn't listen to me. So he went out the door and left. I slumped on the floor and cried my heart out, sure he was gone forever. But he came back and apologized for not walking away. If OP was SOOOOOOOOOO distressed, HE should have walked away.
so your mother was being really nasty to your wife, and you did what? told her to cut it out when your wife was 7 mos along? What about the 7 mos your wife had to put up with your mother??? You invite problem mother to dinner, you let her steal your wife's dinner plate and you let your mother assault your wife and slap her. And you blame your wife for defending herself??? Why the eff didn't you tell your mother that she had it coming for hitting your wife??? Now, what would you have done if, when you told your wife to get out of her own house, your wife had left on her own and left you with the baby?? The baby she had missed dinner for? The baby she breastfed and put down and did all the work while you socialized with the dinner guests?? It's ok for you to abandon wife and child?? And now she's called you out on it, you're all "poor pitiful me"???? Bah, humbug, you deserved it! YTA.
He sounded like a dingleberry tangled in his mom's a s s hair made me chuckle. Good on her for divorcing him and wanting to protect her child.
Mother and son are just two psychologically deranged people. Emotional Incest is alive and well with those two.
This sounds exactly what I went thru with my ex husband and his father. His father was a POS everytime my husband wasn't around so I could never prove anything. Thank goodness he never struck me but threatened everyone with a rifle every time he got drunk which was several days a week. Now he admits what a jerk he was but it's years after his father passed away. Way too late!
What an AH man. He should have hit his utterly disgusting mom, not his wife.
I support booting the wife out. Punching someone in the face is an extreme escalation of violence. It needs to be made clear that such an act would never be tolerated. But.....he sent the baby with her. He let his infant leave the house with a volatile, unstable, violent person who had only minimal supplies. That shows he is a self-centered person who wasn't giving a second thought to others outside his own comfort, not even his own kid. If he'd chucked out the wife for a few days and kept the baby, he'd be 100% in the clear, but he gave his kid the boot as well, so he's not worth keeping.
I think we will be hearing frome these two multiple times in the future. Neither will ever have a happy relationship.
It isn't domestic violence when it's an unwanted guest who just insulted and assaulted you after stealing your food. Simple assault at most.
Load More Replies... I don't understand "I need space NOW" so I'll wait while my wife packs up all kinds of baby supplies. You need space, you walk out the door.
That was my thought. I understand that he is in shock, but if he needs to process, that means that he needs to step away.
Load More Replies... You do not tell your wife, let alone your post-partum wife AND your child to leave your house. If you want space, you go.
If he'd gone and cooled off, things may have been different, but kicking out his wife and child showed hisbtrue colors. Goodnfornher for getting the divorce.
@Ivona ha ... Looks like we found the psycho mother's bp account
Load More Replies... It's odd that his wife's punch set him off but his mother slapping her didn't?
I doubt the father was the only abusive parent.
Load More Replies... When I first read the first part of his side of the story where he said his mom was being clingy.... and then continued being clingy... and he didn't put a stop to it then, I knew where this was headed. Momma's boy wasn't willing to stand up to her, and now he's paying for it. I do think that his past trauma is something they could have explored together if they wanted to reconcile, but I understand her reaction. If he needed space, then he needs to leave, not kick out his wife and baby. Crazy reaction.
I hope she gets everything. The house, alimony, and damages from that Elizabeth Báthory of a "mother in law". What a pathetic cis hetero man-child.
Please don't insult Elizabeth Bathory like that. She was the first to defend women in abusive relationships and was difamed by political rivals AND the church for being a woman in a position of power.
Load More Replies... Okay, this is a little off topic. I have read so many posts on BP where folks talk about cooking a certain number of "portions" of food. This is so strange to me. When I cook, I make sure there's enough for everyone, but not EXACTLY enough. There are almost always leftovers.
Think of it this way - you make a lasagna. It serves 9 to 10. You are having four people over so that’s six people to feed. Lots of food right with plenty of seconds, right? So everybody eats and whoever wants seconds has them, usually half a piece. But you didn’t account for someone wanting three full portions so really, you are serving the equivalent of nine people and suddenly your lasagna that serves 9 to 10 is very tight.
Load More Replies... Went through something similar. My partners mom loved me for the first three years. Then her married lover died, and she moved in with us full time. She flipped. She took our bedroom, wouldn't allow me to cook, made comments about my 'laziness' (I worked nights), and refused to speak English around me. I told my partner about her behavior, and she started pretending I wasn't there. One morning she came into our bedroom and threw a pot of cold water on me. She called me every name in the book. When I tried (naked) to get away, followed me screaming. He just stood there with wide eyes and said nothing. Five years of love immediately gone. I moved the next day.
Partner should have told beatch she couldn't have your bedroom, and you should have put a lock on the door. Not blaming you, though.
Load More Replies... You don't tell a woman with a brand new baby that she can afford to skip a meal. These make feel alright for being single and happyish.
When you decided to get married! Didn't you agree to love, honor, and protect? Well you lied! During that time where was the love, the honor, and the protection?! Why did you get married when you are a Mama's Boy! Your Mom will as it seems to be the first Woman in your life. You should have never gotten married! "He who has found a wife finds a good thing! You were supposed to let your MOM go and cling to your Wife! Please get some therapy for Your Mom issues. If not you will be a Mama's Boy and Not a Man!
Abusive behavior towards a DIL, right after she becomes pregnant? Sons inability to set boundaries with his mother and defend his wife? Well look at that. It's our old friend emotional incest again! The wife needed out and I'm glad for her. She's right. Her ex-husband NEEDS therapy I doubt his father was the only abusive parent in the family. There needs to be more acknowledgement of emotional incest and support for victims that are predominantly male. The devouring mother is an ancient symbol of toxic motherhood for a reason.
If I say what I want to say, BP will ban me for life, so I'll just say, 'I hope she doesn't come back to that...mmm...excuse for a man & and his birth giver.'
Deck the MIL, kick the baby daddy in the happy sack, send the overweight child to Weight Watchers, and live your best life.
You needed to ' process " what just happened ? Are you kidding ? What a childish response. Your spontaneous action should have been to comfort your wife.
Dear wife, just so you know, we all 100% support you! And I do not think for 1 hot busted moment, anyone believed your ex husbands’ tale of woe! It was “ em me me me me “ from the start! I would’ve punched her also! Wonder what his sister was doing? Also , I bet, pretty traumatized by both her deceased dad as well as her mother! Grandma may be over feeding the older grandchild, in a round anout way, to protect her from all men. Who wants to marry or date “ a fat girlfriend or woman” in her mind… but with her state of trauma also, it’s back aspwards, and she is psychologically messed up, likely forever. She definitely needs meds.
Wife is best out of that family. I was involved in a family like that with my ex, and it didn't stop until years after the divorce. She doesn't want to bring her daughter up around people like that and she needs to ensure through the courts that the grand mother is never allowed around the child because she sounds like she would hurt tge child to spite the mother
Make sure the custody agreement explicitly bars MIL from any contact with your little girl. She hates you, how do you think she’s going to treat your child? No being in the same room, house, car, park, or eventually, school. No surprise visits when Dad has custody. Get away from these abusive morons! Good luck.
His custody should be alone and supervised at all times. No overnights, no vacation visits, nothing.
Load More Replies... Lol, he thinks he can get her back. Should have manned up earlier and not thrown your wife and child out of their house. She made a great decision, she gets to divorce his milquetoast a*s and his mother.
With how stupid he sounded, I cringed so much. His poor ex-wife!!! I feel so bad for her! And her child. She deserves someone better!! Her ex-husband is the scum of his mother's weight-gaining soup.
The end is just a joke, btw. No offense intended.
Load More Replies... It's obvious that mommy realized that her son (OP) was not coming back to her when DIL became pregnant. OP should have kicked everyone out except his wife and baby, and he should have taken a walk around the block if he needed "space". Then, he should have groveled to his wife and apologized for allowing this beatch of his mother to abuse her for so long. Make sure there are good locks on the doors so beatch/mom can't get in. I feel incredibly sorry for this new mom and her baby and I wish her a great life going forward.
I'm SO glad that poor wife divorced him + that reddit tore him a new one. :) From the wife's account of that whole disaster-of-a-marriage + that MIL!! Sheesh!! I would've divorced him a long time ago, def. B-4 I got pregnant. Good on you, OP's soon-2-B ex. You now have a better life ahead of you. P.S. Please advise your ex to get counseling - he needs help.
so, she called his wife fat, and then physically hit her, and then went all shocked Pikachu face when the wife hit her back?
Glad you knocked her on her bùtt. Actually amusing to see that happen to a bully. Sorry you had to go through that. Keep your head up. Wish my first MIL did something that stupid. Hope things get better. Husband now you know how not to have a good marriage. You have a textbook case never do that. Your mom needs mental help. That comes from a crazy person trust me.
There is no mention of the age of the baby (unless I missed it) and I never gave birth, but I can imagine that region being tender. I would have responded with an uppercut too as a reflex. From the description of hubby, the wife was ready to say she was sorry... Going against the grain, I do have some sympathy for the guy, probably a PTSD reaction. Not agreeing with his actions, but yes therapy is overdue and it is now upon his wofe to ensure the baby's safety as he failed to do so.
2 months and it usually stops hurting after the first month or so
Load More Replies... Someone made the comment about anyone eating three servings of her lasagna, as she served it with salad and bread. Well, a young woman” starved” for affection would consume that amount of food. Food soothes, when there is loving kindness and affection, missing in a home… sometimes.
Bet his mom is thrilled at how she got her son "back." That mom is bad news. That boy wrecked his marriage because of his evil mother. What a fool.
Your baby needs to be protected from Daddy's side of the family. Dad should have only supervised visitation. I hope that you filed assault charges against that woman as that will help you in court. As for dad, TAH, he needs to grow up, get some therapy and grow past his abusive childhood. It wasn't only his dad that was abusive, his mom is showing her abusive traits now with all of her grandkids and some of her kids.
Feel sorry for the wife. How can your husband dismiss the antagonistic behaviour of his mom and even put you guys in the same room together? How is that ok to allow your mom to diss your wife? smh. Totally the AH
I hope she takes him for everything he has so ha can go crawling home to mommy and die miserable and alone and still holding mommy's apron strings. The one and only time I ever had an outburst with my ex was when he came home late in a bad mood and went to grab the baby off my chest, mad I was cuddling my son. I warned him off. Three times I warned him. Told him you never touch a child when you are angry. He wouldn't stop. So, I kicked him across the room and into the litterbox. I told him do for s drive, go for a walk, go jerk off, whatever he needed to do, but to get out until he calmed down. He came at the baby and I again, and I nearly killed him by throwing a hammer at him. That was when he realized I was really going to hurt him if he didn't listen to me. So he went out the door and left. I slumped on the floor and cried my heart out, sure he was gone forever. But he came back and apologized for not walking away. If OP was SOOOOOOOOOO distressed, HE should have walked away.
so your mother was being really nasty to your wife, and you did what? told her to cut it out when your wife was 7 mos along? What about the 7 mos your wife had to put up with your mother??? You invite problem mother to dinner, you let her steal your wife's dinner plate and you let your mother assault your wife and slap her. And you blame your wife for defending herself??? Why the eff didn't you tell your mother that she had it coming for hitting your wife??? Now, what would you have done if, when you told your wife to get out of her own house, your wife had left on her own and left you with the baby?? The baby she had missed dinner for? The baby she breastfed and put down and did all the work while you socialized with the dinner guests?? It's ok for you to abandon wife and child?? And now she's called you out on it, you're all "poor pitiful me"???? Bah, humbug, you deserved it! YTA.
He sounded like a dingleberry tangled in his mom's a s s hair made me chuckle. Good on her for divorcing him and wanting to protect her child.
Mother and son are just two psychologically deranged people. Emotional Incest is alive and well with those two.
This sounds exactly what I went thru with my ex husband and his father. His father was a POS everytime my husband wasn't around so I could never prove anything. Thank goodness he never struck me but threatened everyone with a rifle every time he got drunk which was several days a week. Now he admits what a jerk he was but it's years after his father passed away. Way too late!
What an AH man. He should have hit his utterly disgusting mom, not his wife.
I support booting the wife out. Punching someone in the face is an extreme escalation of violence. It needs to be made clear that such an act would never be tolerated. But.....he sent the baby with her. He let his infant leave the house with a volatile, unstable, violent person who had only minimal supplies. That shows he is a self-centered person who wasn't giving a second thought to others outside his own comfort, not even his own kid. If he'd chucked out the wife for a few days and kept the baby, he'd be 100% in the clear, but he gave his kid the boot as well, so he's not worth keeping.
I think we will be hearing frome these two multiple times in the future. Neither will ever have a happy relationship.
It isn't domestic violence when it's an unwanted guest who just insulted and assaulted you after stealing your food. Simple assault at most.
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