How would you get rid of a body, I need some tips.

#1

just stuff it into an animatronic

Report

Add photo comments
POST
aiyanamenrige avatar
Bi Kirby
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Good good. Just make sure the spirits don't shove you into a springbonnie! ;)

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu

#2

I bet the FBI is really looking at this thread.

Report

Add photo comments
POST
jackwhirls avatar
Afton
Community Member
3 years ago

This comment has been deleted.

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#3

Get the body and put it in a hole and plant some protected flowers over it.

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#4

Bring it out into a rural area with a large wild hog population, preferably not long after sunset.
It will be completely gone in about half an hour.

Report

#5

...You could dump it in a sewer or something, they wouldn't look down there

Report

Add photo comments
POST
jackwhirls avatar
Afton
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Yeah! And the smell of the sewer would cover up the smell of the rotting corpse!

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#6

To be honest...I'd just burn it and bury the ash.

Report

#7

cut the body up in to hundreds of little cubes and spread them everywhere

Report

#8

1. hide it in a box at your house in a closet
2. tell the police anonymously "I saw someone digging in the woods"
3. wait for the police to finish investigating and turn up with nothing
4. go to the woods and bury your body. they won't find it cause they already looked there

don't ask how I know this

Report

ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT
#9

I-I am kinda worried why you are wondering this BUT anyway I'll give you ALL my ideas.
1. A cemetery
2. burn 'em, give the bones to a dog to chew on, and bury the ashes in sand
3. pig pen (they eat everything, yes, including bones)
4. dig 12 feet down NOT 6, but 12. Put the body in the hole and bury it then put a dead animal and bury that. SO when they dig it up it'll just be an animal and they dont see it bc the body will be 12 feet down not 6 ;).

there yall go. There all my ideas. Right now as im typing this Grammarly thinks my content sounds Confident, disapproving, and informative.. What do yall think??

Report

#11

The local police provide free body disposal services for you. They even provide on scene pick up! One call does it all!

Report

#12

Body Disposal 101:
By Prowl

Remove the head and fingers, which makes it harder to ID. "Lose" the head in a body of water, and bury the fingers somewhere moist with lots of insects.

Dismember the body, and soak it in bleach, to make it harder to find fingerprints and dna.

Scatter the parts, and cover the body in blood from a butcher's shop. It's harder to match DNA when it has multiple sources. Moreso, it takes a while for them to realize it's not from the body, which gives you time to get out of town.

Preparation:

LOCATION, LOCATION, LOCATION!!!
Think ahead about exactly where you are going to dispose of the parts. Profilers look at the disposal sites, and know that the killer is probably familiar with the area, and probably near the center of the disposal sites. So, dispose of the parts, and make sure that they do NOT center around where you live.

Make sure the vic also lives in the area you are going to leave them, or the feds might figure out that you're not there.

Before you kill your target, figure out their routine. When do you have the best opportunity to kill them? When will you have the best chance of taking their body away for disposal without being seen? Where will you actually do the dismembering?

How to avoid getting your materials flagged:

Vics VapoRub apparently helps mask the smell, so I recommend getting some. Preferably a long, long time before committing the crime.

Get your bleach in normal amounts, with some delay in between each purchase, and stockpile it until you have everything else lined up.

Wear mechanics gloves, or two sets of the blue ones. Fingerprints can apparently be left through the blue ones, as theyre thin, and stick. I recommend wearing a disposable poncho, so as to avoid blood spatter.

Have a reason to be out of the city a long time beforehand. Make sure everyone knows. So if someone asks why Prowl is gone, they can say, 'Oh, she is on vacation. She's been planning it for a while.'

Do not bring your phone or any form of tech to the body disposal sites. "Hmm. Prowl was away from where she frequents, and parts of a body were found at several of those places where she lingered. Kinda sus, hmmm?"

Figure out how you are going to kill your target. Plan it out beforehand.

The name of the game is: PREPARATION!

Now, go forth and don't get caught, my pandas.

Ps. It's okay if you put your own flair on it, or take trophies. But, I recommend hiding those even better than the bodies, because it WILL tie you to the crime.

Report

Add photo comments
POST
unstoppble7267 avatar
wade winston wilson
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

i hope somone here is a undercover cop also somone shoud calll the cops either way also i said somthing from a literlal videio game so im cleared right

View more commentsArrow down menu
ADVERTISEMENT
#13

tie something heavy like rocks or something to the legs, arms or ankles and wrists. Than throw them into the water. They should stay under if you tied it correctly

Report

#14

Cut it up into small pieces and hide it across my neighbor’s property over the course of a like a week or so.

Report

#15

Just eat the freaking body. I mean you did have the guts to actually kill someone

Report

Add photo comments
POST
jackwhirls avatar
Afton
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Hey! I understand killing a kid, but eating one!? That's horrible! It's inhumane!

View More Replies...
View more commentsArrow down menu
#16

Wear gloves while disposing the body. My guess is to cut the body up into pieces and flush it down the toilet, one piece at a time before anyone suspects anything. You don't want your fingerprints on the meat tho, so ig wash the knife really good. Poison anybody who is suspicious of you also.

Report

#17

why the heck are you asking...??

Report

ADVERTISEMENT
#18

Put in a cemetery because looks there. Also if for some reason someone digs up the body, it would seem normal

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#19

I would chop off the head
then take out the insides
then run over the skin sack with a bulldozer
then fold it up and shoot it into space

Report

#20

Do what Hannibal Lecter did and feed the best bits to your guests at a dinner party. You can even boil the bones into a broth. I guess you can stick the inedible bits in the bin just before the bin- men arrive or give them to strays.

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#21

give them tea with poison ivy in it it will slowly make the persons organs fail

and there will be no evidence

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#22

How to get rid of a body
by : galaxy wolf
1)put the body in a bag
2) Get a taxi
3)take a picture of the license plate
4)tell them to take you to a random location
5) leave the bag in the taxi
5 1/2) if they ask, tell them the bag has cash but its heavy so you should probably put it in your trunk
6) when they leave, call 911
7) tell them the license plate so the police will follow the car
8) RUN FOR DEAR GOD LIFE

Report

Add photo comments
POST
ADVERTISEMENT
See Also on Bored Panda
#23

Easy. I'm a pro.
1. You take a potato peeler and peel all of the skin off. Once you get that far you take the main bones/ meat, boil them, separate the other bones that are harder to get off the body such as the head, hands and feet, put those in a small water bottle after they've been chopped off and chunk it into the ocean with the cap off. This will attract sharks who will eat it. With the organs and small bones and skin and such you make a sausage. Serve that at the neighborhood crawfish boil. Take all leftover blood and livers and things you cannot eat or process and you make popsicles or candy or something sweet and send your friends out in nondescript white vans to get arrested instead of you.
2. Send your senior grandparents with dementia through airport security with the frozen (now defrosting and leaking) body chopped into cubes in their suitcase.
3. Put them in the septic tank of a few abandoned buildings
3. Get some 55 gallon steel drums, put the body chunks in the drums and after simmering for a while put caustic soda in the thing after about 24 hours go out in the desert or forest and pour the liquid out.
4. Wood chip it all. Put it in a backpack and go backpacking. At some run down public bathroom, go in and make straining noises and flush all of the chipped body down the toilet. Including the duffel bag
5. Make biodegradable golf balls with body inside and go on holiday and get rid of it that way
6. Last one! Wrap it in chain link fencing or chicken wire and seal all of the exits for material. Go way out to a shipwreck in the deep ocean and drop it. The wire should let the small fish and crabs in to eat but make it harder for sharks and things people kill and check out the stomachs of to find it

Report

Add photo comments
POST
savannahmcquillan avatar
Community Member
3 years ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I gotchu Afton. No. I'm totally sane. Also forgot abt the wild hogs. Go to a secluded area and shoot the hog. Then stuff it's organs with the body. It should be the consistency of pulled pork. Yeet the hog out where you shot it

ADVERTISEMENT
See Also on Bored Panda
#25

Lay it in plain sight on a mountain and put someone else's fingerprints on it. I saw it in a movie.

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#26

1. Burn it
2. Bury it... REAAALLY deep
3. Toss them into a lake with weights tied to them.
4. HIDE THE BODYY UNDERNEATH ANOTHER BODY... (Double decker coffin with a secret compartment.)

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#27

1. Learn to sew
2. Advertise that you can fix stuffed animals for a very cheap price
3. When you fix stuffed animals put a tiny cube of the body inside

Report

#28

Here is a kill that you'll get away with, Mr. Afton. Get an icicle and stab someone multiple times in their chest. When the police arrive, they won't find any murder weapons because the icicle melted.

Report

#29

Step 1: Afton, i worry about you
Step 2 : burry it and plant endangered plants over it so its illegal to dig up

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#30

If you burn it, don’t burn it in your own oven
Put it in a skip, but make sure it’s buried
If you can, this would be hard, make sure it gets into a bin lorry. But make it look like your neighbors or a stranger disposed of it
Why do you want to know?..

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#31

I saw this answer before somewhere on Quora so that’s where I got this o-O

Dig a deep hole, put the body in, cover halfway with dirt, then put a dead animal body on top of that (one that wouldn’t be sus, such as a common largish house pet) and continue to fill the hole with dirt.

Report

#33

The majority of disposal techniques are location dependent, but one you should be able to do in almost any town or city is: 9 Litres of petrol and a Biffa bin (Dumpster in the US). The only thing that will be left is a bit of ash and any medical implants ("Loose" any implants in a body of water).

Report

Add photo comments
POST
See Also on Bored Panda
#34

Chop it up into little pieces, stuff it into a large sack and yeet it in the ocean.

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#35

1. Put it in a trash bag and fill it up with random garbage so it would be like normal garbage in it.
2. Wait for it to be garbage night.
3. Put it in someone else's garbage so they might get framed for disposing a body. If this doesn't work then...
4. Take the body and repeat Step 1 and Step 2.
5. When they arrive, ask to throw it in yourself.
6. If they say no, give it to them because you followed Step 1.
There you go.

Report

Add photo comments
POST
#36

Per a TV program that seemed reasonable (?), I would feed the body to the pigs. Not having any pigs at the moment, I would bury the body in an abandoned mine shaft. Better yet, I would not kill anyone.

Report

Add photo comments
POST