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Hey Pandas, Here Is A Safe Place To Rant Or Talk About Your Feelings
Since the holidays and the year are winding down, I know a lot of have some built up stress from it all so here, I want to give you a place to rant about your problems, or issues. A place to ask for advice, or even to help give some advice to someone going through some hardships. I just want this to be a safe place for people to let go of the emotions they may have been holding on to for too long. Please don't be mean in the comments or make fun of people. Please keep this a safe, calming environment for everyone. And Pandas, please know that you all are loved and appreciated by me!!! Hugs and kisses to all of you!!!
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So me and my gf decided to tell her family we were dating. We had had lunch and were playing a game of two truths and a lie. She said she was bi, she had a gf and she was moving out. They said oh the lie must be u have a gf
Sooooooo basically we’re moving in together!!!!!! She got kicked out and I’ve lived by myself since both my parents died. I’m so p****d at her family though. What should I do to support her? Btw we’ve been dating for 4 years.
That's so harsh. I'd have to say it may be best just to be there for her for now. Just try to make things a little easier on her so she doesn't have to do too much. Let her know that if she ever needs to talk about things or a shoulder to cry on, that you'll be there whenever she needs you. Don't try to force her into talking tho, just give her some time and if she needs it, some space as well, but still let her know that you are always there for her. And congrats on being together for 4 years!
I'm on my phone so I can't fit the thing in here so read the comments
Ok so I have this aunt that we normally video call for Christmas cause she lives on the opposite side of the U.S, and she is the only member of my family that we have a lot of contact with (my family is all over the place). Soooo anyway we were calling her and we were doing are normal thing; small talk, playing truth or dare, discussing tax laws in the different states, ect. So all normal everything is going smoothly and then out of nowhere she says to me " No makeup? Why are you going around scaring the boys off?"
I (19f) have a brother (16) who is the complete opposite of me so we don't really get along very well. I am artistic and love to read, and he has told me that my hobbies and interests are worthless because I can find books for under $5 at Bookman's and his hobbies (which all involve tools) are more valuable because his stuff is all over $100.
He is also really into cars and mechanics, but it's the only thing he can talk about. I'm pretty sure he has no idea how to carry on a conversation that is not about vehicles or himself. He is also in incredibly egotistical. He is the center of the universe and the rest of us have the honor of revolving around him. Which pisses me off because I'll do something hard or rewarding and he turns the entire conversation to himself. I once achieved something very few could do in high school, and most of our close friends didn't know, but they certainly knew everything about his forest service internship.
Recently, my parents have been forcing us to spend time together to get along. I have constantly reached out a branch to try and work things out, but I get shut down (to be honest, I haven't been a peach either, but I try to get along but it's hard when you can't talk about anything you want, or get compromise). I had to ride home with him from camping today. Headphones and a book because I did not want to hear him say that he was roughing it in a tent all weekend while I slept in the heated motorhome (he had the choice, wanted to stay in a tent), or how expensive has was or his latest thing to fix on his truck.
Last night my youngest brother (15) and I cleaned up and packed the entire motorhome ourselves while he sat by the fire, happily chatting away. Asked him to help me take down the tiny Christmas tree we had, goans and sly whispers about how I could do it myself (I could, but it would have taken me three times as long). Mom and dad say they see everything, but why the hell do I feel like he is the favorite child, entitled and egotistical and in serious need of a reality check.
How am I supposed to live someone who is the type of person I try to avoid in the world?
It is my experience that people with such dispositions want the attention on themselves until it's something that doesn't stroke their egos. Then, it becomes a finger-pointing pissing contest with a bunch of denial, gaslighting, and "but what about" statements to downplay their shortcomings. Being a path of least resistance kind of person, I don't bother with the confrontation due to a lack of desire to waste time and energy with no progress. Some people learn the hard way, and some never learn at all. Live and let live, and just be a good person, because at the end of the day, you have to live with yourself. You can't make others do the same, but you can set a fine example. I also believe that those who feel the need to frequently do the one-upmanship thing have a very weak sense of self-worth. They're not just reminding everyone else how awesome they are; they're usually trying to convince themselves as well.
Every time my family goes to a restaurant for lunch or dinner, I always eat most of my food because I don’t want my parents to worry about me and my eating disorder. It’s hard to deal with an eating disorder.
I want to die from my decisions I wish I could change dont judge but I used to online date I know terrible but I was very lonely I had maybe two friends and I wasn’t allowed to add them on iMessage so I was all alone but then I found out how to glitch apps on my phone/ iPad and I started to talk to someone (probably old man) and he listened to me he was all I had but then my mom took my electronics and read all of it it was so embarrassing she sat me down and I told her I was lonely had no friends and wanted to kill my self she said she would talk she was never there I get it work but I was just a lonely kid and she took my only friend away I didn’t get electronics for 8 months in that time I told her again how I wanted to die she had me go to my dads thinking it was my siblings that were the problem it was worse there I don’t like my dad he has a cat I’m allergic to it was living hell but when I came back I felt more terrible didn’t want to talk because I didn’t want that to happen again my mom said it’s selfish to kill yourself for the sakes of others feelings but later on I went to therapy I started acting up changed therapist this one was one who wanted money she only cared about my moms side and made sure my mom was the good guy and I was bad later on I got with my crush therapy was gone I took pills I stopped taking them because they stopped me from sleeping my mom found out she said I thought it was a joke then took the rest away from me and it just is terrible because I have a phone no social media at all I have iMessage I got contacts I have been sitting here all day I haven’t gotten a single notification except for flipping Duolingo asking for me to start on Japanese again but now my mom doesn't trust me and I want to die I don’t want therapy I don’t want pills I just want a friend a real life friend I’m all alone…..
I'll be you friend, I'm so sorry you had to go through this. You got this, don't give up! We're here for you <3
I feel like I should add mine as well just to get it off my chest. So a while ago ( over a month) I started talking to this guy who I liked and he admitted that he also had feelings for me but he wasn't ready for a relationship quite yet and neither was I really being I had only a few months before gotten out of a really toxic relationship. But we've been in the talking stage for a few weeks now and he flirts with me a lot which is weird for me only because I'm not all that used to it. I kinda flirt back but in an awkward, i'm-not-sure-what-to-say kinda way, but the few times I sound more confident in my flirting back he takes a huge step back and says that things are moving too fast for him and that he's getting flashbacks of his 1st and only relationship and that he wants to slow down. So I agree and we calm things down or at least I try to but he keeps up with the flirting all the time until a few days ago. I have this kinda bad habit where I apologise all the time for things, even if it was entirely out of my control, because of my past trauma and I'd accidentally said something ( he was upset about something and I tried to calm him down so I could understand what he was trying to say) and he got really upset and kinda went off on me which kinda set me off a little bit and so I got really quiet and even more apologetic than usual. He got even more annoyed that I was apologising so much and told me to just stop. I got even more quiet. The next day tho we both talked it out or so I'd thought. The last two days (today and yesterday) I've tried talking to him, just normally, like how I would on a regular day and he's just been very dry and nonchalant about everything. I asked him what was wrong and he only replied with " I just don't have anything to say to you." I tried reaching out to him today and he didn't even answer at all. I'm kinda worried because he was a really fun person to just hang out with and talk to and now I'm worried that maybe I ruined it. I'm even more stressed though because tomorrow is our mutual friend ( my best friend's) birthday party and I know he's going to be there and I'm just super worried about what may happen.
Sounds like the yo-yo maneuver, where one person draws another closer, only to push them away, only to draw them back in. I recommend cutting that string.
There is a lot but i’m summarizing. 1) I don’t know why but I’ve always had a problem where I “like” too many people at once. I guess I have a tough time keeping “they’re cute” and “I want to date them” separate. It really messes with my friendships and makes it harder for me to keep male friends. 2) I have this friend (f) who is always around me and we hang out all the time. She has a different friend that she calls her best friend. She puts all her attention and energy into that friendship but the girl she’s besties with doesn’t seem to care about her. I don’t know if i should say something or just let it be. 3) I made a really big mistake last year and everybody at my school think I’m some kind of a bad person and I don’t know how to get them to stop. It’s been over forever and it’s just them being immature at this point. It really takes a toll on my mental health bc it took me a long time to get over what happened. So every time someone mentions it I want to cry or scream or something. I’m just not physically or mentally up for living right now
My parents really like pissing me off. They found out the majority of my friends (and I'm) queer so they constantly make jokes about it to upset me for example. They constantly insult they/them pronouns and trans people in general and I'm just so tired of it all. Overall my parents r pretty good people and ik they love me and want what's best for me but by now I don't feel like I can open up to them about anything. Even my dad who gives no f***s about anything. They think they're so funny but I'm just so fed up with them insulting my friends and me, even if they don't fully mean it. They also bring up dumb s**t I've done for fun to upset me too. We we're talking about GOOD s**t that happened last yr and my mum just had to use it as an opportunity to be mean. They're good people so I should feel grateful that they're my parents... I used to after all... But I'm not. I just want the admiration I had for my parents when I was younger back. My mum being so smart and my dad being so amazing in social situations. I want my old parents back even if they never changed really.
sorry if this was a mess I just came back from a depressing dinner and I'm tired of it all
My Ps4 needs a factory reset, so I'll lose all of the data I had on it (this is the second time this has happened in the last two weeks), and my computer just died. Thankfully I bought a new computer before it did, but I don't like this one as much, and there's a real possibility I'll have to return it. Just a bit frustrated with my technology :/
Please stick with me, i'm sorry, it's long. Also, my spelling is bad.
So, first, I have a LOT of social anxiety, to the point I feel like I want to throw up, even around people I knew really well. It makes me not able to pay attention or have fun, as I'm always so anxious. Even on here, I am anxious "around" people I seriously don't know at all. I' so scared I come off to strong, or annoying, or like I'm trying to be cool and failing.
Even my best friend who ive known my whole life I'm scared to be around because I don't know what she thinks of me. other freinds I feel like they hate me because I don't even know, I've done nothing to make them hate me! But i have all these trust issues because people have hurt me really really deeply. I know a lot of manipulative people who have used me and continue to use me, and think i'm stupid but how do you confront someone about that? if you say "you know i'm not stupid" you sound stupid.
the worst thing is, I forgive people so easily, so they can just hurt me all over again. I refuse to get mad at people because i think it will make me a bad person, when i just keep hurting myself again and again by giving people 100 chances.
I'm SO scared of being a bad person. I say sorry way to much and hate everything I do because i overthink it to the point where giving someone a compliment on their hair, makes me a horrible human being. my overthinking problem is getting to be too much for me, but i can't stop.
I also compare myself so much, it makes me hate myself so much that I want to scream and not really kill myself, but just somehow cease to exist while still existing. I compare my looks, my personality, talents, even my problems to other people problems which I hat most of all. i feel so selfish and ugly and I just hate myself so much I want to cry.
I found out I have ocd fairly recently, and it has ups and downs. I CANNOT have anything on my hands, and I have caught myself washing my hands seven times in ten minutes from sitting on the couch doing nothing. I have all these intrusive thoughts that wont go away, and obsessions I can't stop. I feel like somethings wrong with me all the time.
I hate thinking about my future, and living up to my sister. She's 16 and in collage, has a car, has two well paying jobs(She's not poor, just bored), people think she is in her twenties, and I(not her, ME) am constantly told she could be a model. I am happy for her success, but she is so arrogant sometimes, and she refuses to awknowledge how that makes me feel. I think she thinks I say I have anxiety to try to be cute and quirky- when that is far from the truth, trust me. She has zero respect for me, when she's not even that much older than me.
I also cannot stand to think my dreams wont come true which is so ridiculous i know. but i have this idea of what and who i want to be and i feel like if i don't get that i will be so crushed which is a horrible and unrealistic, i know.
Plus, I have a bit of depression that comes and goes, not super serious, but enough to get me exhasted all the time and unmotivated. I hate it because when I'm happy, i tend to act very silly, which I hate, so I try not to act like that, which ends up making me depressed. a great cycle i know.
thank you for sticking with me if you made it this far
I am so sorry this happens to you! You shouldn't feel the need to hide your pain from anyone just because they think you're "sensitive". And I'm sure you're an amazing person! There's no need to compare yourself to your sister, everyone does things in their own time! You shouldn't doubt yourself, because only you fully know what you're going through, no one else.
The past month I have been talking/ somewhat dating this girl I like. She likes me too, or so she had said. She sometimes doesn't answer that fast and I was fine with that, but the second that winter break started, she had started to answer me after like 1 or more hours with only single word answers. Then after a fee days, like 4, she just stopped saying anything. I had tried by just saying hey for like 2 days after she stopped, then said happy holidays on Christmas. I sent that at 7 am to her and she answered me at 10 pm saying it back but nothing else. I really liked her, but I'm afraid of what's going to happen when we go back to school in a few days.
It's been like 2 weeks since she's last texted me btw
When my daughter was 7 (she’s 11 now) all her nascent health problems came together and ramped way up. She couldn’t keep food down most of the time, but very rarely she could eat a ton. Constant pain and accidents and extreme bloating. No pattern to type of food, amount, nothing. Most of her hair fell out and she got so thin. My husband and I were frantic. We had 6 specialized doctors working on her, X-rays, bloodwork, allergy tests, I honestly don’t remember all of it. She missed months of school, threw up sometimes 10 times a day. Every single day. In the middle of all of this I get an email from my parents. They’re worried about her, it’s obvious she’s sick and my husband and I need to start taking this seriously and get her fixed. I’ve never felt so floored in my life. They knew about the appointments, the medicine trials, everything. They “just wanted to help.” I haven’t told them a single personal thing about my family since then. And it took about a year of absolute hell before we got her diagnosis and medication that works. She’s doing great now, we just have to manage her condition but it’s so much better. And now we limit conversations with my parents to small talk.
