“I Could Hear His Tummy Grumble”: Mom Asks If She’s A Jerk For Sending Kids To Bed Hungry
Interview With Expert
Juggling kids’ meals should be an Olympic sport. Or at least an art form. Even when you have one, you’ve got to know that he likes ketchup but will flip out if you put barbecue sauce anywhere near his french fries. When you have two – double trouble.
Kids are notoriously picky eaters, so it’s no surprise that one mom went to share her woes on Reddit. The aptly named Mama2Dragons asked the internet whether how she handled her two kiddos was too cruel. Netizens gave their verdict, and it was pretty unanimous. Scroll down to see the full story and how it ends.
Bored Panda asked children’s dietitian and feeding specialist Lucy Upton to tell our readers more about a healthy diet for a child. Keep scrolling to find her advice for parents on how to deal with picky eaters.
More info: The Children’s Dietitian | Lucy Upton
Getting a 5-year-old and a 2-year-old to eat their veggies can be a hard task
Image credits: LightFieldStudios (not the actual image)
This working mom got frustrated with her kids and let her best judgment fly out the window when they refused to eat dinner
Image credits: YuriArcursPeopleimages (not the actual image)
Image credits: Mama2Dragons
4 tips for parents whose kids are fussy eaters from a pediatric dietician and feeding therapist
When it comes to dealing with a picky eater, patience is key, Lucy Upton tells Bored Panda. Lucy is a pediatric dietitian, feeding therapist, and founder of The Children’s Dietitian. She helps parents navigate feeding challenges so that their children can enjoy food.
She says that dealing with a fussy eater takes a long time. “Often, even with the best mealtime practices and strategies in place, nothing drastically changes with the diets of fussy eaters overnight.” But there are some practical strategies to support picky eaters.
First, try eating together. “Eating alongside children allows them an opportunity to explore different foods and build confidence by watching others eat them,” Upton says. “This also means you can focus on some foods you yourself want to eat.”
Second, avoid pressuring kids to eat. If you want long-term solutions, Lucy says coercion isn’t one of them. Certain methods can often cause children to become anxious or avoid mealtimes altogether.
These futile rules include long mealtimes or asking children to take a bite. Even putting other food on a pedestal and saying, ‘If you eat X, you can have Y’, or force-feeding can make picky eating worse.
The nutrition expert also advises combining accepted foods with exposure foods. “This means ensuring at each meal a child has some accepted or preferred foods available to eat, which are there alongside some foods you’d like them to learn about, explore, and eventually try,” Upton explains.
Lastly, Lucy tells parents to trust their kids and give them some autonomy. “So many children in the throes of fussy eating are toddlers striving for some independence,” she tells Bored Panda. “Giving choices or options, meaning ‘Would you like peas or sweetcorn with dinner?’ or serving food family style can all be helpful.”
Image credits: Naomi Shi (not the actual image)
It is possible for picky eaters to still maintain a balanced diet despite their food preferences
“This can be a tricky one for some, as you can’t simply make a child eat a certain food,” Lucy begins. Many parents worry their children aren’t eating enough, but the dietician advises to look at things calmly.
“I often remind parents that a balanced plate and diet doesn’t need to be overcomplicated. Often, children are getting enough variety to support their health.”
The children’s dietician recommends writing down the foods your child will eat. “Make sure there is at least something from every food group,” she says. “Carbohydrates, fruits, vegetables, dairy or fortified alternatives, and protein-rich foods is a great starting point.”
“If any column looks more sparse, you might want to prioritize plenty of exposure to those foods first.” The expert suggests considering fortified foods as well. “Ready oats, cereals, bread, and even some milk can be helpful,” she says.
Also, don’t shy away from getting some outside help. “If you’re worried about variety, a Paediatric Dietitian can support you with individualized advice for your child,” Upton adds.
Image credits: Vanessa Loring (not the actual image)
Children being fussy eaters is a totally normal and expected part of growing up
Children’s nutritionist Sarah Almond-Bushell writes that all toddlers go through a picky phase. “It’s part of their brain development and asserting their independence,” she writes in her blog. It’s related to a developmental phase that’s named “neophobic” – the fear of something new.
Almond-Bushell writes that babies enter this stage at around 18 months. “This is where they become suspicious of both new food and some familiar foods,” she explains.
Babies throw fits when forced to eat something they’re afraid of. This fear is not forever and passes with age. The key to overcoming this fear is repeated exposure. The nutritionist writes that’s why it’s not uncommon for toddlers to accept a portion of food after 10 or more times.
Lucy Upton also names several other reasons kids can refuse to eat in her blog. Sometimes their learned experiences can influence their reactions. “For children who may have had a trickier start with feeding such as reflux or food allergies, it can be more common to see feeding difficulties,” Upton explains.
Other kids can have sensory issues with certain foods. They are more receptive to how food feels, smells, and tastes. Genetics can also be a factor. Researchers found in 2013 that genes that govern taste can impact pickiness when it comes to food.
Many commenters deemed the mom the jerk, warned her that wasn’t good parenting
But there were some people who empathized with the mom saying she’s not the AH, and they shared their own stories
The mom addressed concerns and suggestions from the commenters in her edit later
Thinking each child would eat the meal because there was a little of what each child liked in the dish is crazy. Instead of making one-pot meals, cook things separately, and allow them to choose what they want to eat from the items provided.
Yeah, that was my thought, too. The ingredients, individually, would all be ok with me but everything mixed into a casserole, I'd hate. Kids don't have the most adventurous palettes, either. But I have OCD (I'm 47 and noticed it when I was still a kid) and don't like any of my food to even touch. I put EVERYTHING on a seperate plate or bowl. My husband will gather a piece of meat, veg and something else all in one forkful. I couldn't even imagine eating that way- although to be fair, he probably thought it was weird for me to eat with 3 or 4 dishes. But I can safely say that casserole sounded kind of bad.
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Sorry, different opinion. Don't fight your kids on food. You don't want to be forced to eat thing you find gross, either. Cook what you like and if your kid doesn't want it, let them have a sandwich.
My kids ate a LOT of cereal. Don't want this? Eat cereal. And oddly enough, they would eat the semi-healthier cereals so they weren't just eating a bowl of sugar.
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Total AH move. I know it’s tough getting kids to try new things and eat but you can’t make something you know is on the gross list and say “no dinner” if they don’t eat it. There’s a kid who likes meat and one who will eat veg; if the meal had the components separate instead of all mixed together, mingled flavours, I bet each kid would have eaten something. I was “that child” and my mom always said she wouldn’t cook a separate meal but she would leave my food separate & plain before making it into “something good” for everyone else. Example is shepherds pie: I would get a pile of plain (cooked) ground beef, a pile of frozen peas (still frozen; only way I’d eat them), whatever other veg might have been thrown in for the rest of them, & plain chunks of boiled potato (everyone else got mashed potato on top of the shepherds pie). They enjoyed their meals and I…well, I ate it, which wouldn’t happen if it was mixed.
My spaghetti noodles came without the sauce. Fruit and veg were always part of meals. I might not have eaten the whole meal, but I was always fed and never made to eat something I really hated.
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Thinking each child would eat the meal because there was a little of what each child liked in the dish is crazy. Instead of making one-pot meals, cook things separately, and allow them to choose what they want to eat from the items provided.
Yeah, that was my thought, too. The ingredients, individually, would all be ok with me but everything mixed into a casserole, I'd hate. Kids don't have the most adventurous palettes, either. But I have OCD (I'm 47 and noticed it when I was still a kid) and don't like any of my food to even touch. I put EVERYTHING on a seperate plate or bowl. My husband will gather a piece of meat, veg and something else all in one forkful. I couldn't even imagine eating that way- although to be fair, he probably thought it was weird for me to eat with 3 or 4 dishes. But I can safely say that casserole sounded kind of bad.
Load More Replies... Sorry, different opinion. Don't fight your kids on food. You don't want to be forced to eat thing you find gross, either. Cook what you like and if your kid doesn't want it, let them have a sandwich.
My kids ate a LOT of cereal. Don't want this? Eat cereal. And oddly enough, they would eat the semi-healthier cereals so they weren't just eating a bowl of sugar.
Load More Replies... Total AH move. I know it’s tough getting kids to try new things and eat but you can’t make something you know is on the gross list and say “no dinner” if they don’t eat it. There’s a kid who likes meat and one who will eat veg; if the meal had the components separate instead of all mixed together, mingled flavours, I bet each kid would have eaten something. I was “that child” and my mom always said she wouldn’t cook a separate meal but she would leave my food separate & plain before making it into “something good” for everyone else. Example is shepherds pie: I would get a pile of plain (cooked) ground beef, a pile of frozen peas (still frozen; only way I’d eat them), whatever other veg might have been thrown in for the rest of them, & plain chunks of boiled potato (everyone else got mashed potato on top of the shepherds pie). They enjoyed their meals and I…well, I ate it, which wouldn’t happen if it was mixed.
My spaghetti noodles came without the sauce. Fruit and veg were always part of meals. I might not have eaten the whole meal, but I was always fed and never made to eat something I really hated.
Load More Replies...
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