BF Doesn’t Know What To Do After GF Reacted Badly To Pic Of Engagement Ring He Already Bought
Interview With Author
Before marriage, there usually comes an engagement, and those who decide to take their relationship to the next level through this process first have to get the ring.
There’s always some guessing involved, as proposing to someone is most often paired with the element of surprise, even if your other half already knows this moment is coming soon. But as one Redditor recently found out, picking the ring out together doesn’t guarantee that you can’t mess something up. When he showed his girlfriend a picture of the ring she previously liked, she wasn’t as sure of it as before, not knowing that he had already bought it for her. Scroll down to read the full story!
More info: Reddit
When we’re really nervous before very significant moments in our lives, even the tiniest hiccups can seem like the grandest mess-ups
Image credits: t-indy
A man decided to propose to his long-time girlfriend and got her a custom-made ring, very similar to the one she loved at a store
Image credits: Liza Summer (not the actual photo)
When he showed her the ring’s picture, pretending that he found it online, the woman wasn’t as excited about it as before
Image credits: t-indy
The man felt as if he messed up and wasn’t sure if he should try to sell the ring or propose with it anyway
The OP and his girlfriend have been together for a fairly long time. They reached the point where they talked about how they wanted to spend the rest of their lives together and have since been shopping for the ring together.
A few days ago, the couple was texting each other, and the man decided to send his girlfriend a picture of an engagement ring, pretending it was from a website. She had a few issues with it when she saw it, even though she previously loved an almost identical ring they saw together in a store.
The catch was that the ring in the picture was the one that the OP had already gotten her, having it custom-made with no possibility of return. This left the guy gutted, and, at the time of the story, he was considering whether he should sell it and get a new one or propose with the one he got anyway.
The commenters’ response was overwhelmingly supportive. They all jointly cheered on the poster, telling him that he was overthinking it and that his girlfriend would love the ring anyway.
Hyped up by all the good words, the OP answered, saying that he decided to take the advice and pop the question on the coming Saturday, promising to add an update afterward.
Image credits: Jackie Tsang (not the actual photo)
The wholesomeness of the OP’s story really got us invested. Looking for additional details to satisfy our curiosity, Bored Panda reached out to t-indy, who was glad to help, expressing his shock at the fact that so many people took an interest in his story.
Since most people buy an engagement ring in absolute secrecy from their other half, the poster’s approach of shopping for it with his girlfriend seemed a little unconventional and, thus, interesting. Being as curious as we are, we asked him how they came to this idea.
“She and I have lived together for quite a little while now and honestly had talked about eventually wanting to get married and not even having a ceremony or doing paperwork because it’s really just a piece of paper when it’s the commitment to each other that is what matters most,” answered the OP, adding that his girlfriend is a Taylor Swift fan and, referencing one of her songs, has told him multiple times she would marry him with paper rings.
“But I wanted to get her something slightly more substantial than that, so over time, we started talking about different things, mostly not so traditional [options], like having her birthstone for the center stone,” continued the man, explaining how one weekend they just decided to go to a couple of jewelry stores to see how the rings they checked out online looked in person.
Image credits: Marko Klaric (not the actual photo)
The OP said that when it came to proposing to this girl, his mind was made up, and even though he was married before, he had never been more sure of anything in his life than this. “There’s zero doubt in my mind that she’s the person I want to spend every day of the rest of my life with. I had doubts with my previous marriage, but not for a second here.”
When the moment finally comes, the man plans to have his kids and the rest of the family present, who are all on board with the idea. However, first comes the proposal, and the poster has a wonderfully wholesome plan for it, too.
“She really loves my dog, probably as much [but] maybe a little more than me. I plan on making up a little sign and hiding it in my pocket with the ring while we go on a hike in one of our favorite spots and hang the sign around the dog’s neck that says, “Will you marry us?” and have the dog run up to her when she’s not looking,” shared the OP.
In the end, this seems like a very beautiful story with a mild case of overthinking. But at such a significant moment in one’s life, most would likely agree that some nervousness is absolutely expected.
While probably nothing in life is ever truly 100%, if we had to guess, the OP’s chances of success are as close as they can get. But since the said moment is still ahead of us, let’s just wish him the best of luck and hope that everything turns out better than he could ever imagine.
What did you think about this story? Do you prefer traditional or more unconventional proposals and weddings? Let us know in the comments below!
The commenters cheered on the poster, saying that he was overthinking, and they managed to convince him that he should pop the question with the ring that he had
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There was a second update! "Update 2 : So I couldn’t wait till Saturday I asked her last evening she….. and she said yes! She kept saying how she loved the ring how perfect it is and she couldn’t believe that I did it. I did show her this post. She just looked up at me and said “you goofball”. As many of you said in the comments it was hard for her to tell from the photo. I over thought this so much and put way too much pressure on my self to make things perfect. Just being with her makes me so happy. We make each other better people. I’m so lucky to have found her. I don’t think I’ll need to update this post again, thank you again to everyone who took the time out to comment. Hopefully I won’t need to make another TIFU on this"
My husband bought a ring based on my deceased mother's birthstone. It was styled poorly but well made. I never told him and wore it faithfully. Shortly before the wedding I asked him if he'd be offended if I had the ring restyled to include the stones from a pair of mom's earrings. He was good with that. So now I have a ring that is very meaningful for me and that I like, and his feelings were never dinged.
My husband designed my ring because he knows me well enough to keep it simple. Proposed at home, asked me to put the kettle on and when I turned around he was down on one knee and had put a little frame on the counter with a picture of Batman proposing to Wonder Woman and a little Lego batman holding the ring. It was adorable. I asked him recently why he did it like that and he said "I don't know... I just panicked"
I'm very glad my husband was smart enough to let me pick out exactly what I wanted. It's so bad when you get a ring, but you don't like it. You feel like a pos for wanting something different, but you like what you like and engagement rings are so personal and (should) last a lifetime. It's important that you like the ring.
As an older woman, I find it interesting how times have changed. The rule used to be that you proposed without a ring, because it was thought to look either too confident or as if you thought her love could be bought. If she said yes, you chose the ring together later.
I have 2 rings: my original wedding ring/engagement ring soldered combo that I wear to fancier outings. It snags and the diamonds come loose easy, so dressing up means less damage. Then I have a plain white gold band for everything else that I got a few months after marriage. I love having options without fear of losing or damaging anything!
How can you be ring shopping before proposing? If you've both agreed to be married, you're engaged, just pick the ring together, or even better, save the money and put it towards a holiday, wedding or home.
Yeah we never did the whole "blow a couple paychecks on a shiny rock" thing. He just gave me a pretty, lab-created sapphire ring. Got shamed for it even, told it wasn't a "real engagement" unless the ring cost so many weeks' pay. 🙄 And the whole "she picks out her own engagement ring" thing, what's the deal with that? Buy yourself a ring with his money and it's supposed to symbolize something then? I don't get it. (Joke's on alllll the people who looked down their nose at my tiny, inconsequential ring -- our marriage has outlasted *every single one*)
Load More Replies...
In the OP he says it's custom made and he can't return it. Then later, he says, "They do offer returns for 30 days". ???
Update! "Update 2 : So I couldn’t wait till Saturday I asked her last evening she….. and she said yes! She kept saying how she loved the ring how perfect it is and she couldn’t believe that I did it. I did show her this post. She just looked up at me and said “you goofball”. As many of you said in the comments it was hard for her to tell from the photo. I over thought this so much and put way too much pressure on my self to make things perfect. Just being with her makes me so happy. We make each other better people. I’m so lucky to have found her. I don’t think I’ll need to update this post again, thank you again to everyone who took the time out to comment. Hopefully I won’t need to make another TIFU on this"
I have never understood the importance of these rings. Yes, they are a symbol of a promise and love and it will be worn on that finger for some time but it is just a piece of jewellery and often there will be another one with marriage. But I have never understood that the wrong bridal dress can ruin the whole wedding either.
Jeez people. You go to a reputable jeweler. Buy a very simple, single stone ring with the understanding that it is temporary and you will be back with your fiancé to choose the permanent ring. And that the full cost of the temp ring is applied towards the permanent ring.
Why say, "Jeez people"? Not everyone knows this is an option. It's not like people propose often.
Load More Replies...
Obviously asking someone's opinion about something in a vacuum is way different than them getting that thing with attached sentimental value.
She never wrote she didn't like the ring. She voiced a valid concern about it's practicality in everyday life. That's not the same. When she fell in love with a similar ring she wasn't confronted with it actually becoming her real engagement ring. She was in a relaxed situation and only cared for the looks then. But when he asked her for her opinion on the actual ring, she was in a different situation. She still liked how it looked but was already thinking about wearing it every day, so the consideration of practicality was more of a valid concern. Now she has a ring she likes, but might be impractical. Only time will tell if it's as impractical as she thought and if it must be replaced or if her enjoyment is worth the occasional hassle. That's okay. It doesn't mean she doesn't like it.
The talk of proposals reminds me of mine. I had gone with some friends on one of the big trail rides leading up to the Houston Rodeo. I met a girl there on Friday night before the ride started, who had also come with a friend. We hit it off and spent a lot of time with each other over the next few days. On the following Thursday night, six days after we met, I proposed and she accepted. I hadn't been anywhere where I could buy a ring, so we picked out the rings together on the next weekend, on our first date. We got married three months later, and still going strong. That was 36 years, two children, and three grandchildren (so far) ago.
There was a second update! "Update 2 : So I couldn’t wait till Saturday I asked her last evening she….. and she said yes! She kept saying how she loved the ring how perfect it is and she couldn’t believe that I did it. I did show her this post. She just looked up at me and said “you goofball”. As many of you said in the comments it was hard for her to tell from the photo. I over thought this so much and put way too much pressure on my self to make things perfect. Just being with her makes me so happy. We make each other better people. I’m so lucky to have found her. I don’t think I’ll need to update this post again, thank you again to everyone who took the time out to comment. Hopefully I won’t need to make another TIFU on this"
My husband bought a ring based on my deceased mother's birthstone. It was styled poorly but well made. I never told him and wore it faithfully. Shortly before the wedding I asked him if he'd be offended if I had the ring restyled to include the stones from a pair of mom's earrings. He was good with that. So now I have a ring that is very meaningful for me and that I like, and his feelings were never dinged.
My husband designed my ring because he knows me well enough to keep it simple. Proposed at home, asked me to put the kettle on and when I turned around he was down on one knee and had put a little frame on the counter with a picture of Batman proposing to Wonder Woman and a little Lego batman holding the ring. It was adorable. I asked him recently why he did it like that and he said "I don't know... I just panicked"
I'm very glad my husband was smart enough to let me pick out exactly what I wanted. It's so bad when you get a ring, but you don't like it. You feel like a pos for wanting something different, but you like what you like and engagement rings are so personal and (should) last a lifetime. It's important that you like the ring.
As an older woman, I find it interesting how times have changed. The rule used to be that you proposed without a ring, because it was thought to look either too confident or as if you thought her love could be bought. If she said yes, you chose the ring together later.
I have 2 rings: my original wedding ring/engagement ring soldered combo that I wear to fancier outings. It snags and the diamonds come loose easy, so dressing up means less damage. Then I have a plain white gold band for everything else that I got a few months after marriage. I love having options without fear of losing or damaging anything!
How can you be ring shopping before proposing? If you've both agreed to be married, you're engaged, just pick the ring together, or even better, save the money and put it towards a holiday, wedding or home.
Yeah we never did the whole "blow a couple paychecks on a shiny rock" thing. He just gave me a pretty, lab-created sapphire ring. Got shamed for it even, told it wasn't a "real engagement" unless the ring cost so many weeks' pay. 🙄 And the whole "she picks out her own engagement ring" thing, what's the deal with that? Buy yourself a ring with his money and it's supposed to symbolize something then? I don't get it. (Joke's on alllll the people who looked down their nose at my tiny, inconsequential ring -- our marriage has outlasted *every single one*)
Load More Replies... In the OP he says it's custom made and he can't return it. Then later, he says, "They do offer returns for 30 days". ???
Update! "Update 2 : So I couldn’t wait till Saturday I asked her last evening she….. and she said yes! She kept saying how she loved the ring how perfect it is and she couldn’t believe that I did it. I did show her this post. She just looked up at me and said “you goofball”. As many of you said in the comments it was hard for her to tell from the photo. I over thought this so much and put way too much pressure on my self to make things perfect. Just being with her makes me so happy. We make each other better people. I’m so lucky to have found her. I don’t think I’ll need to update this post again, thank you again to everyone who took the time out to comment. Hopefully I won’t need to make another TIFU on this"
I have never understood the importance of these rings. Yes, they are a symbol of a promise and love and it will be worn on that finger for some time but it is just a piece of jewellery and often there will be another one with marriage. But I have never understood that the wrong bridal dress can ruin the whole wedding either.
Jeez people. You go to a reputable jeweler. Buy a very simple, single stone ring with the understanding that it is temporary and you will be back with your fiancé to choose the permanent ring. And that the full cost of the temp ring is applied towards the permanent ring.
Why say, "Jeez people"? Not everyone knows this is an option. It's not like people propose often.
Load More Replies... Obviously asking someone's opinion about something in a vacuum is way different than them getting that thing with attached sentimental value.
She never wrote she didn't like the ring. She voiced a valid concern about it's practicality in everyday life. That's not the same. When she fell in love with a similar ring she wasn't confronted with it actually becoming her real engagement ring. She was in a relaxed situation and only cared for the looks then. But when he asked her for her opinion on the actual ring, she was in a different situation. She still liked how it looked but was already thinking about wearing it every day, so the consideration of practicality was more of a valid concern. Now she has a ring she likes, but might be impractical. Only time will tell if it's as impractical as she thought and if it must be replaced or if her enjoyment is worth the occasional hassle. That's okay. It doesn't mean she doesn't like it.
The talk of proposals reminds me of mine. I had gone with some friends on one of the big trail rides leading up to the Houston Rodeo. I met a girl there on Friday night before the ride started, who had also come with a friend. We hit it off and spent a lot of time with each other over the next few days. On the following Thursday night, six days after we met, I proposed and she accepted. I hadn't been anywhere where I could buy a ring, so we picked out the rings together on the next weekend, on our first date. We got married three months later, and still going strong. That was 36 years, two children, and three grandchildren (so far) ago.
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