People Use This Online Group To Ask “Does Anybody Else” Questions, And Here Are 50 Of The Best Ones
Sometimes, it’s easy to believe you’re the only one in the world who’s ever had a particular idea or opinion. Or that nobody else does things in the manner you do, for the reasons you do. But whether it’s a specific way you listen to music, get out of bed in the morning, or generally approach life, it can feel isolating to think you’re different from everyone else. The chances are, however, that at least one person understands what you're going through. They're only sometimes a bit hard to find.
If that’s the case, then you’re in luck! There’s a 2.3 million-member powerhouse over on Reddit dedicated purely to this cause. Aptly titled "Does anybody else...?", this online community invites people to anonymously ask burning questions they’re curious about. Then it helps them find-like minded individuals to share experiences, spark rich discussions, and make them feel less alone.
We’ve scoured the group to find the most interesting posts you might relate to all too well. So sit back, buckle up, and get ready for a wild ride where "DAE" was only the start of the conversations that followed. Keep reading to also find in-depth interviews about our desire to feel unique with psychologists Joshua Klapow and Jesse Matthews. Be sure to upvote the entries that hit close to home and share your thoughts with us right below in the comments!
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DAE still not have tiktok downloaded and isn't planning to?
DAE restart a good song if they are distracted and not appreciate the song enough?
DAE really love extreme stormy weather—Dark clouds, lightning, rumbling of thunder?
To learn more about what’s going through our minds when we feel different and alone in our thoughts, we reached out to Joshua Klapow, Ph.D., a psychologist and creator of Mental Drive. He started this well-being initiative to help people live healthier, more fulfilled, and successful lives by teaching them about psychological tools they can use every day. According to him, every single one of us holds beliefs we see as unique to us, and the same is true for behaviors we believe are strange, odd, or quirky.
Klapow pointed out this happens because of our ability to have a wide range of thoughts and yet at the same time, we understand that some of them are not appropriate or consistent with social norms. "This is the amazingly complex nature of being human," he told Bored Panda. "We have the ability to think in creative, abnormal, destructive, obscure, odd ways and yet also have the ability (most of the time) to not share those thoughts we believe are not appropriate or will be misunderstood."
In these situations, sharing our views may feel dangerous as we may expect to be laughed at or judged by others. But the psychologist also mentioned that while we tend to keep our odd thoughts to ourselves, knowing that it's not just us is fulfilling. "In fact, when perchance we share or discover that someone else has had similar thoughts, beliefs, and/or odd behaviors, we often feel incredibly validated."
DAE sometimes get halfway through writing a comment or reply, only to say "eh, screw it." and just move on?
DAE get so anxious about the stuff you need to get done in your day that you end up just wallowing in a cesspit of procrastination as your anxiety continues to grow while you sit there doing nothing, rather than just getting up and doing it?
DAE hate having to make an account for pretty much everything online these days?
We also managed to get in touch with Dr. Jesse Matthews, a licensed clinical psychologist based in Chester Springs, PA, who agrees with this line of thinking. "Most people probably overestimate how different they are," he explained. "If we consider being original to be cool or better, we may have a bias toward seeing ourselves this way. Confirmation bias may lead us to pay attention to what fits our view of ourselves while overlooking or ignoring what doesn’t. But in the context of the world, past to present, chances are whatever weird thought you’ve had or unique viewpoint you hold, someone else has too."
Still, most people have a desire to feel one-of-a-kind. "This can start from as early as birth if we grow up being told how different and special we are," he argued. "In a literal sense, we are all unique, even in a world of nearly 8 billion people," Matthews added that uniqueness is considered positive in many cultures and can be a great source of self-esteem. "As such, being different or seeing ourselves as not following the crowd can be considered cool, better, being a leader, and it can become a large part of our identity.”
"However, we are all born and raised in a cultural context and conditioned in the same ways, so there are probably more similarities. Even across cultures, human beings have been found to be similar in many ways."
DAE stay up too late despite needing to sleep because you don't want your free time to end?
DAE ever just suddenly loose interest in everything and everyone and just want to spend your days alone in silence with no human contact ?
I used to think I needed at least one human free day per week to recharge. If I didn’t get it, I would become irritable and quick to temper. Since WFH the last two years, I have discovered that actually, my optimal setting is 5 human free days per week.
DAE actively not want to use a product if it’s advertised too much or forced down your throats?
Same with TV shows. The more awesome someone tells me it is, the less likely I am to watch it.
Interestingly, recognizing that you share similar views with others is helpful in several respects. See, many people Matthews has worked with cherish feeling different but also report that it can be isolating. "Knowing you aren’t alone is powerful, particularly if depressed or lonely, and it can give you hope that you just need to find your people."
"This often happens when people go off to college, travel, or leave a small town for the city. They often find friends they never thought they would, people to date, or even whole communities of like-minded people," he said, adding this also applies to the online world as well.
DAE say to themselves, “Wed-nes-day” when you’re writing down Wednesday?
DAE have in-between clothes? I wake up, put on hang around clothes...but if I have to go out in public I have another level of clothes for that. Then when I come back home I change back to the crappy comfy clothes. Anyone else?
DAE check their pee color and feel proud of themselves when they see that clear hydrated urine?
"We are social beings, and the connection we have with others is what keeps us thriving. So to connect on deeply personal thoughts, intimate behaviors, and things we might keep very close gives us a way to connect to a larger social network and this is critical for our psychological well-being," psychologist Klapow said.
"It’s validating and gives us a sense of security to know others experience what we experience and do what we do. But it’s also validating sometimes just to know others know what we are thinking and experiencing and they respect and care about us even if they don’t hold the same views."
DAE intentionally look away from those video ads that they force you to watch for 10 or 15 seconds before you’re allowed to click “skip ad” in order to not give them the satisfaction that they got you to watch?
A lot of advertisers are so dumb they show stg like lifestyle images in the time before I can click skip so I have no idea what the ad was about.
DAE not feel comfortable if they have things to do later in the day?
DAE feel attractive when they look in the mirror, but feel hideously ugly when they see/take a photo?
Of course, we should still strive to become knowledgeable, rounded, and well-informed human beings. "We shouldn’t fall into the trap of thinking that we can or should only associate with like-minded people," Matthews added. "Often, this isn’t possible or realistic, but it’s also a rigid mindset that can rob us of opportunities to get to know, appreciate, or understand people who we see as different."
"Many people even hold a dichotomy that people like them are good, and those not viewed as like them are bad. This doesn’t apply only to things like racism, but everything from politics to where you live to what kind of music you are into. It’s nice for any of us to find like-minded people. We just want to be careful not to believe that they are the only people who hold value," Matthews suggested.
DAE get weirdly anxious before a planned phone call, video call, or meeting even if it is very casual and even your friend?
I watch it ring until it stops. Their fault for calling, super rude, send a goddamn text like a normal human, GAWD 😂
DAE think the elderly should have to take periodic driving tests to insure they can still safely drive?
DAE practice fictitious arguments in their head in order to be prepared in case the imagined situation manifests itself for real some day?
yes, and then it becomes so frustrating when the other person does not play their part. I had come up with this elaborate plan on how to get the authorites to send me a new license, despite there being some technicalities they may have had seen as an issue. It was a beautifull script with: Then they will try this, and then I will present this argument, and if they then try this, I will do that etc. and of course I would have a really sweet victory at the end, having defeated this monster after a long battle... and then they just complied and send me a new one upon the first request.
Moreover, participating in discussions you care deeply about online or in real life can spark new ideas and even change your perspectives. Aside from that, it can even help us create validating emotional connections, Klapow said. "Once that happens, we have a level of trust that we might not otherwise have. And with that trust, we are safe to explore new ideas, new thoughts, new ways of seeing the world."
DAE when your pet is cuddled with you, try to explain to your pet the reason you’re getting up and that you will be right back and not to move?
I do this with my cat, he seems to only try to come lie on/over/with me if I'm about to do something or go to the bathroom, etc. I'll pick him up and tell him what I'm going to do. Sometimes he goes back to the spot he was in before, but sometimes he'll either follow me or wait like he understands the time it's going to take.
DAE rarely take breaks when doing physical labor around the house because the second they stop to rest they lose all momentum and won't start up again?
Nope, I take frequent breaks as "rewards". Have a smoke before I start "because you'll be busy for a while" then go in and start, then "oh look, the bathroom's clean, good job, let's have a smoke before moving on to the next room." And so, cleaning my house that could easily be done in an hour (I have a very small place) takes me about an hour and a half to 2 hours.
Not a smoker, but I take frequent breaks to rest my legs and check my phone. Only time I keep going for longer is when I'm at a good point in the podfic and feel like listening for more
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Yes - having a chronic fatigue condition makes me constantly second guess whether I should be taking breaks or whether stopping will result in a complete crash where I can't talk or move for an hour. And there's no right answer - other sufferers agree sometimes you have to take breaks, sometimes you have to push on until you can afford to crash when the adrenaline drops.
Yes. I have to move while the mood strikes, because my lazy a*s will stop the moment I relax.
I have this same problem with exercise. Once I get myself in to a routine, I have to keep at it even if my muscles are screaming. I hate getting injured or have life get in the way because it will absolutely destroy the routine and I’ll backslide far too easily.
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Yup. That's exactly what I do. I tend to procrastinate, so when I start to do something, I take advantage of the motivation, and do EVERYTHING, not stopping until it's all done. I'll then reward myself with some nice food and/or drink followed by falling asleep on the sofa watching a movie.
Omg, when I was in my 20s I would get up, feeling rested and immediately just start cleaning, take a moment to make coffee, and then just go at it until it was done or clean enough to feel content. Now I just can't do day long cleanings anymore, so I do various tasks throughout the week.
That's me! I clean my 3-room house every morning (dish washing, cloth hanging, floor sweeping/wiping, bathroom cleaning, balcony washing, etc) before I go to work and it takes me about 1:30 to 2 hours. My wife (who's already at work at that time) still doesn't understand how I manage to do it...
I consider it a huge accomplishment when I can spend 2 hours cutting the grass without stopping.
Absolutely! I have a specific time when I do all my cleaning and I have to power through without stopping or it will never get done.
I don't do this one, I have a list of things (in my head) I need to get done and break it up into smaller tasks every time I have reason to get up or go into another room. Takes all day to complete an hours chores, I contend more efficient though.
Yes. The sooner it's done, the sooner I can relax. I hate when I do something that require someone's help, like moving furniture, and that someone take breaks every 10 minutes. We could have been done yesterday, dammit!
Oh god yes. Hubby's the opposite. Stopping for smoke breaks all the time. Me? I just want to get it done so I can sit down. Moved 3 cords of wood by myself while everyone else took a break.
Yep, precisely. I have very low muscle tone, so once I have gathered momentum, I try to do everything in one go.
Sometimes those little breaks are important, especially in the summer. Take a five minute breather and have a cold glass of water and continue. It also helps you take the pressure off doing those chores.
Sort of, but no. When I get in from work, I make dinner immediately as if I sit down, dinner will be delayed by at least 90 minutes. However, when doing things around the house, I work in 15 minute chunks, changing tasks after 15 minutes. In each hour, I'll have 15 minutes of rest. This is where a timer works beautifully.
DAE find it almost impossible to fall asleep without at least a sheet covering you
"Knowing you aren’t alone and aren’t 'crazy' for what you think or how you feel is a core element of therapy," Matthews added. "This can be especially powerful in a group context. The same is true in support groups, clubs, other organizations, and so forth. And this is why finding your people is so important." And if feeling different equals feeling isolated for you, look for people and find sources of support. "A therapist, in particular, can help you to feel validated and to increase your self-esteem, also to cope with difficulties and to find other means of support and belonging."
DAE try to catch actors “breathing” during scenes where they’re supposed to be dead during movies/shows?
DAE get annoyed when looking at recipes online and before they get to the recipe you get this whole backstory about growing up in Kansas and every Sunday......
Oh, yes. And before that you have to switch off permission for every single possible cookie and no, you don't want to receive the newsletter and gnaaahhh, where is that friggin "X" to get rid of the video-pop-up, and noooo, I clicked X and not open, and where is that "Jump to recipe sign"?, ah, there, and nooo, why the heck is there another ad right where I want to see the whole ingredients list?, and why am I suddenly on Amazon shopping for extra organic fair trade, superfood sort-of green grass seed?
DAE say 'Hi' to their pets whenever you walk by them around the house?
"We ALL have thoughts, beliefs, and behaviors that are odd, strange, out of the norm. The more we can remind ourselves of that, the more we can feel connected to society. And if we get a chance to connect with someone who shares these oddities, we have a chance to build trust. Be careful, but be willing to share. You never know who needs to hear that they are not the only ones," Klapow concluded.
DAE get pre-annoyed before someone starts talking because you already know how annoying they are?
DAE pay attention to how long the driver's eyes are off the "road" when they are talking to a passenger in a movie/ tv show?
DAE get sad because you feel that everyone else is closer to each other than anyone is to you?
DAE occasionally come across a distinct smell that immediately takes you back to some vague childhood memory that you can't quite put your finger on, and you're overwhelmed with a beautiful sense of familiarity and nostalgia for a few seconds until it vanashes?
DAE sleep better when they hear rain or know its raining out?
Rain is the only weather that I almost always fall asleep and stay asleep in.
Does anybody else's blood run cold when someone says "we need to talk" to you?
I have a boss who will occasionally message or mention casually "I need to talk to you later", but then he just completely forgets and the 'talk' never happens 0_0 You've no idea the level of anxiety that gives me!!!
DAE sometimes try to use a word you don't use very often in a post or comment but quickly google it first to make sure you are using it correctly and don't look like a dumbass?
DAE always say "ouch" whenever you bump into something even though it didn't hurt?
I got stuck on a door with my backpack strap and I yelled “ow”. My friend came back to help me.
DAE get into random spurts of motivation to be productive and just starting doing things that need to be done all at once and if you stop for even 5 minutes you go back to procrastinating/laziness?
DAE eat the worst parts of a plate of food first so you can enjoy the rest of your meal?
YES! I always save the best for last so the best taste lingers after the meal.
DAE get lost in nostalgia while cleaning out storage and then spend the whole time looking at old photos, playing with old toys, etc instead of actually cleaning?
DAE like sleeping with a fan blowing on them but being burried under the covers?
Menopause means AC at 67*, a fan blowing on me, but my weighted blanket for anxiety. It's an interesting time.
DAE think that it's not "tomorrow" until you go to sleep, no matter how late you stay up?
It's not "tomorrow" until the sun comes up, I don't care what the calendar says.
DAE, when packing, take at least 2 times more underwear then you would ever need for that trip, 'just in case?'
I pack underwear as though I'm planning to Sh*t my pants every day, twice a day.
DAE used to count the people in front of them when reading out loud in class to see which sentences you had to read and practice before it got to you?
DAE wait to eat their meal until they have found the right show or movie to watch on tv?
DAE when they notice someone's typo, look at their keyboard to see if the wrong letter is near the correct letter?
DAE get frustrated when watching someone Google something less efficiently than you would?
DAE feel like they can’t enjoy their day if they’re expecting something or doing something later in the day?
DAE just allow people to repeat something they’ve already told you without saying “you told me this already”?
DAE think the music they listen to is really good while listening alone, but when showing it to others, they get extremely self-conscious about it?
DAE purposefully not look at a flashy car so the driver doesn't get an ego boost?
DAE feel guilty when a repairman is over and you're not helping him/her, even though the reason you're paying them is to do a job you don't want to do?
I usually hang out and watch or talk to them about what they are doing lol
DAE imagine what the exact location you are at looked like thousands of years ago before it was discovered by humanity?
DAE ever hear their alarm go off in the morning and immediately start rationalizing quitting your job or dropping out of school in order to stay in bed?
YES! Or if I have some kind of appointment I think I will just skip it.
Note: this post originally had 79 images. It’s been shortened to the top 50 images based on user votes.
Did anyone else try and ignore the DAE at the start of everyone of these, because it was so annoying? I had to read the first section just to know what DAE meant.
DAE feel guilty about not being productive during the day while everyone else gets stuff done and/or achieves sth?
yessss i feel like I am letting my future go to waste
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DAE drive along at the speed limit? In Toronto we now have speed camera robots, and the rate is $5 per kilo over the limit. I got hit for 18 over a forty, which was $90. Plus tax and 'convenience fee' for paying using my bank card. Total of $118,50. Educational, yes. Now I cruise along at a happy speed and let cars pile up behind me. And do they ever!
Speed cameras are evil! They should have to catch you!
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I literally upvoted everything on the list. I wish they were more than 50 items though, super cool!
I literally had to stop reading this list bc it’s giving me a panic attack. I mean, it’s nice to know others have these problems, but now I’m stressed AF feeling like all these situations are imminent. Yikes.
Did anyone else try and ignore the DAE at the start of everyone of these, because it was so annoying? I had to read the first section just to know what DAE meant.
DAE feel guilty about not being productive during the day while everyone else gets stuff done and/or achieves sth?
yessss i feel like I am letting my future go to waste
Load More Replies... DAE drive along at the speed limit? In Toronto we now have speed camera robots, and the rate is $5 per kilo over the limit. I got hit for 18 over a forty, which was $90. Plus tax and 'convenience fee' for paying using my bank card. Total of $118,50. Educational, yes. Now I cruise along at a happy speed and let cars pile up behind me. And do they ever!
Speed cameras are evil! They should have to catch you!
Load More Replies... I literally upvoted everything on the list. I wish they were more than 50 items though, super cool!
I literally had to stop reading this list bc it’s giving me a panic attack. I mean, it’s nice to know others have these problems, but now I’m stressed AF feeling like all these situations are imminent. Yikes.
