My 40 Comics That I Hope My Parents Will Never See

I'd be very happy to get out in my thirties - just in case it was moving really fast. Would not want to be a child EVER again. Or a teenager.

The background check and security clearance for Jonathan must have been quite intense!

Subtle observation on US policing

Pangaea. Took me a moment.

Ah the British response

Hate that question. If you are not interested, don't ask!

Happened to me in high school: One day on the hallway a teacher asked me how I was, it was something similar to this conversation up there (not that I had big problems as far as I remember, I only wanted to give a more detailed response with my little problems than the teacher expected); the other day (or the day before, I don't know anymore) it was the other way around: another teacher also on the hallway asked the same question I said I was OK but they kept asking how I'm *really* wanting a more detailed response but I wasn't in the mood for it and was really OK at the moment.

I hear ya! I’ve been confused about how much to tell people for years. Now, at age 60, I feel that we are not supposed to have candid conversations about ourselves at all. So much for just commiserating.

I hate these kinds of useless phrases of politness. Can't you just say "hello" and move on.

So true... why ask if don't care?

Do you want the truth or a polite lie?

Lol

That's how too many people actually think....

You are saying " the British response and the Swedish response" if you wanted the American response it would take them a week to tell you and after they had finished you would go out and hang yourself.

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If you have serious problems in your life do NOT dump them on friends and aquaintances - they will feel uncomfortable at best - even close friends when there is nothing they can do to help. Save it for those whos job it is to listen and provide expert advice - even if just a helpline or a voluntary service.

Cop: Yeah, George tried to bribe me last week. Didn't work.

Grandma needs the money, to buy a new bra.

Now they do the job for her.

At least they aren't incandescent with rage!!

Smart Yogi.

Well at least she died peacefully in her sleep.

Hmm - very glad that this circumstance will never come up! How can you remember birthdays and NOT your wedding anniversary? I don't get it and yet there is my husband, a walking cliché!

He should have warned her he's an interior designer 😀

"Advanced Procrastination" is my textbook of choice.

A cheater and a dumb mate. Those two crazy kids are gonna make it.

This is why you need to specify what you want to get famous for. I totally didn’t know that when I was younger.,

People Power! All lives matter!

Be careful what you wish for.

Put them out of their misery!

I mean...yay for them?

That I’m still paying off

I've seen a similar one which was equally as funny (not that I'm suggesting it's copied - people can have the same idea) but this one is much better drawn.

Can we get a Captain Push-Over movie please?

I would say that's a good guess.

This made me choke on my coffee.

Good visual pun ending but in one the upper panels, the money should have been screwing HIM.

Maybe she'll have a brighter future.

I thought she was going to mug him...

Didn't he know he could just get a library card? 📗📘📙

LOL!!!

Is this joke from 1952?

Judging by the fact that he didn't even try to run, I think that he also was indecisive. No, seriously, I know that I'll be downwoted (again...), but it really irritates me that this is always the girl who is portrayed undecisive and demanding one. It also works the other way... :(

let's hope bill cosby isn't the one who made those drinks

He liked the HOSPITAL???

Why do kids ask at the last freaking moment?

Well, you can't say he didn't do his part.

Is that The Rock?

My cat would lick her butt right on my chest, in front of my face. "BEHOLD, THE EYE OF SAURON!"

Notice the drapes in the last picture... 😬😬

oh nooo the dog