When you start a new job, it’s only natural to put your best foot forward and show off your best assets. So you immediately strive to make a great first impression and build a solid reputation, whether through hard work, professionalism, or proving you’re a team player who’s always willing to step up when the company needs it.
But the truth is that work environments — and bosses — vary widely, and while some recognize your efforts and respect your dedication, others manage to show zero appreciation for your loyalty to the company, the supervisor, or both. And one recent story shared on the ‘Anti Work’ subreddit is a perfect example of that.
An employee who goes by the handle MoneySquash6169 recently detailed how her manager often asks her to cover for a coworker on her days off. But one time, she wasn’t sure she could make it, and her boss wasted no time going “on some type of power high” and demanding to know about any personal plans she makes in her spare time. Below, you can read the full story and let us know what you think of this manager’s unreasonable expectations in the comments.
This employee recently shared how her manager had unrealistic expectations by insisting on knowing about any plans she makes on her days off
Image credits: Andrea Piacquadio (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Karolina Grabowska (not the actual photo)
Image credits: MoneySquash6169
Everyone hopes to have a leader who inspires, supports, and helps them thrive in the workplace. But the dire reality is that not every manager wants their workers to become the best version of themselves. Some seem to make it their mission to place unrealistic expectations, ridiculous demands, and generally go on power trips to keep employees under their heels.
But there’s only so much an employee can take. As the Great Resignation has proved, workers who have had enough of horrible leaders and their antics decided the best course of action is to simply leave the company. A recent MIT study that investigated the sources of the Great Resignation found that the top reason people left their positions was toxic corporate culture. In fact, they found that a workplace culture impacted retention more than wages.
To learn more about unreasonable manager demands and how to respond to them, we reached out to Sunny Patel, a UK-based career-change coach aiming to help professionals find careers that excite them. According to him, when supervisors demand workers come in on their days off — and even ask about their personal plans — it can mean one of two things.
“This can definitely be a sign of a manager who doesn’t respect the employee’s boundaries between work and life,” he told Bored Panda. “But it can also be indicative of an employee who hasn’t made those boundaries clear in the first place.”
The manager is clearly crossing the line, but as employees, we may wonder what are the best ways we can handle these uncomfortable situations. Coach Patel suggested being honest and addressing the issue at the first opportunity. “None of us are obligated to share our personal lives with our employers, and none of us should feel there is anything wrong with making clear that we have lines in the sand, and where those lines are,” he advised.
“In many cases like this, a manager likes to wield a little power, but if the first time is met with something pragmatic, such as ‘it’s my day off, I’m unavailable’ and a refusal to go into further detail, it automatically reduces the need for these conversations in the future.”
“If we fall into the trap of justifying ourselves and trying to prove that our personal plans are important enough, then we are essentially telling our employer that we are happy to do so, and we’ll find it happening frequently,” the career coach warned.
Communicating your boundaries with your boss may sound like a hard task, as sometimes the lines between our professional and personal lives become blurry. But Patel stated that striving to achieve a healthy work-life balance is simply crucial. “It’s easy to downplay this, but without balance, we can experience burnout, and/or start to resent our job. Neither of these can lead to anything positive.”
“For me, I always appreciated honesty from my staff. If you can’t do overtime on certain days, or you need an occasional amount of flex around working hours, I’d prefer to know up front,” Patel said. And while he wouldn’t ask for the reason why, some managers surely will. “If it’s for things such as school runs or to walk your elderly neighbor’s dog, then why should it be an issue for them? If it is, that’s a red flag, and it’s better to spot those as early as possible.”
“You’re not walking into a workplace each day to sacrifice a piece of yourself, you’re walking in to bring your true self. So if the reasons or plans you have represent something important to you, then they are important. They don’t need to pass anyone else’s importance test,” Patel concluded.
Readers jumped to the comment section to criticize the manager and her questionable actions
If OP is regularly working 35+ hours and in the US, the employer is REQUIRED to offer health insurance, or will otherwise be penalized. This is part of the ACA (Obamacare) passed by ages ago, and sets "Full Time" by the governments standards at 30 hrs per week. OP needs to talk with the labor board b/c this sounds pretty illegal
Yes. Though that does only apply to employers with 50 or more employees.
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In Japan, if you're "part time" but work over a certain number of hours, you're entitled to partial benefits. It was to prevent stupid things like having people work 39.5 hours a week and not paying benefits.
I wish benefits were just a given. It's not like a part time worker doesn't need benefits. They aren't half a person. Not to mention, every job I've had still requires me to pay taxes, and fees for those benefits. It makes no sense that's it's not just a universal community provision.
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Why yes Friday is the orgy and the astroglide slip and slide. Saturday is the ritual in the woods accompanied by yet another orgy. No word if we get the slip and slide on Saturday tho.
Sunday is aftercare day. Can't do anything on Sunday
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That depends on where op is. If in Canada, you can work 40 hours a week and still be a part time employee. The extra hours are not overtime and there is no requirement for benefits or holiday pay. To be considered part time here, you only need to have guaranteed hours per week and depending on the province that falls anywhere between 8 hrs/wk to 20 hrs/wk
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I'm wondering if that "teenager who calls out every Friday" is even really scheduled. Sounds like manager thinks she's slick, and has set this up so she basically gets a full-time employee without having to pay benefits. I'd talk to the labor board, and maybe get a lawyer.
Completely illegal. Start an email and text trail and report her. I wish I had had this knowledge when I was younger. A lot fewer bad things would've happened to me if I had found my spine sooner.
Why can OP's boss not say no to the teenager who works for her? Are they dating? Good luck to you OP on your job search.
WOW. Am I the only Panda who has the balls to stand up for myself? The owner of the IT company I used to work for (I'm a bookkeeper and worked from home as needed, only going into the office on Mondays - for 5 hours) asked me to clean out the refrigerator & microwave and then could I "tidy up & vacuum" the office? "Um, that's a hard NO, Jon. I'm only here 5 hours a week. I have never ONCE used the refrigerator or the microwave, I dust my own desk and empty my own garbage can. And I find it extremely insulting that you would ask me to clean up after you and the other 2 full time male employees. I can only assume that it's because I'm the one with the uterus." He was stunned silent, but never asked me again.
Must be USA. There are situations in which the employers CAN tell you what you can and can't do in your off time. But they need to inform you of such before they hire you. Like some places of education can dictate what teachers do for extra curricular or extra jobs outside because they don't want a teachers face popping up in an adult video or swinging herself around a pole at the local strip club. But working retail...your boss can skip rope. She's just wanting you to work full time without the benefits. Check with the labor department to get their take on this.
I had a boss that basically tried to do the same thing to me at one of my old jobs. They had me listed as part time but scheduled for 40+ a week. The boss wanted me to tell them if I had any plans or whatever on my days off. I spoke to someone in the labor department and was told that they have absolutely no reason to know anything that I did when off the clock. When I told them I had plans when asked if I could work on my Day off they tried to suspend me but it backfired on them and they were fired as a result. I got promoted to their job in the end.
I see several comments above telling op to tell her boss off. I understand why you would want to but you probably should resist. Don't give grounds for termination. You always need to be respectful even if they aren't.
Some helpful responses when asked about personal time and plans: - Oh, it's not work related. - Just some personal plans. - I'm sorry, I'm not comfortable sharing personal information. - I prefer to keep my personal and work life separate. Fun responses: - This is enema and cleanse weekend. - Tantric sex workshop - Bank robbery - Porn star side hustle - Bible study and prayer circle - Coven meeting, blessed be - Swingers sex club with BF - Working your other job that you're not at liberty to discuss - Snipe hunting - Working on your labor law advice and employer review vlog You can take back your privacy. You may have to explain that while you've been open in the past, it's not something you're comfortable doing anymore, but you'll provide ample notice regarding availability. If necessary, tell her you recently learned about life-work boundaries in a labor law class you're taking.
Nope. Not gonna happen. Not now , not ever . What I do in my off the clock hours is not your business. Especially, if you're not paying time & a half, for working off schedule
Just tell her you have a new GF and she is really hot and you're going to banging her all weekend. I will bet she will back right off.
I used to ba a part time employee at Burger King that happened to work exactly 40 hours a week. Every week. I earned lees because of it, and got absolutely nothing outside of a sandwich each day. They didn't even have me work 8 hour days, I might work 10 days straight and still be considered part time. Why does it work like this?
Why do I never encounter these people? Is it because I look like I'd tear your head off and sh*t down your neck if you asked me to sacrifice an unscheduled weekend? Maybe RBF is a thing to have.
Plans for Friday, 10/21: 6-7: wake up and nestle with the cats. 7-7:15: Get out of bed, walk to the bathroom, pee, get distracted while on the toilet, get off toilet, wipe, flush, make sure the toilet has actually flushed. 7:15-8:00 Wash hands, wash face, notice pimple, squeeze pimple, wipe pimple juice off the mirror, take toothpaste and toothbrush out of medicine cabinet, squeeze toothpaste on toothbrush, brush teeth... And so forth for the entire day. She probably won't ask again. Look for another job.
This reminds me of a couple of things. One: on a job in the '90s, I worked with a guy who routinely worked 50 hours a week, and was made department lead (hourly 2nd-in-command to the manager) about a month after he was hired. The first holiday that occurred while he worked there was Thanksgiving, and he noticed that the check that covered the holiday included 4 hours holiday pay. When he asked HR to fix it, he was told "there's nothing to fix, you're a part time worker so you got part time holiday pay." How they categorized workers had no relation to the hours they worked. There was a lot of shady stuff happening there, and it was a big box with over 60 locations so it wasn't some mom-and-pop c**p. After three months on my next job, I was on the safety committee. In a meeting, the HR manager implied that our off-schedule activity was the company's business. I pushed back, politely. Three days later I crashed my motorcycle and was out for 3 months. Awkward. But I stick by what I said.
All I can say is this: when 20-somethings start VOTING and demanding action from government, the lack of benefits will change. Technically, you're not "powerless," but when 50% of those under 35 STILL FAIL TO SHOW UP & VOTE each and every Election Day, you make yourselves POWERLESS. Good luck. 🤞🏻
Nope right outta there this instant! The only time what you do during your off-time is the boss's/business is when whatever you're doing impairs your ability to work your schedule. Ex: hungover, high, being in jail, stuff like that. But if you go out and have a wild time (or whatever) and show up to work on time, ready to work, then ain't the boss's business.
The sad thing, in the US, is that people in management, especially low-level management positions, think their job is to babysit their team members underneath them and kiss the a*s of their superiors and that doing that will make them more valuable and benefit them in the long run by earning them promotions as well as higher salary. Here's a tip for anyone in management. You have one job and one job only and that is to make sure that your team preforms as best it can. The way you do that is by making sure that every member of your team has enough work to feel useful and appreciated but not stresses and in over their head. To make sure that there is as little friction as possible between all the team members. Your employees will work better and harder if you treat them with dignity and respect and make them feel supported and valued and not like children who need to be punished.
Demanding to know personal plans could be verging into illegal territory, especially if you're using your time off for medical reasons. The same way they can't ask questions about if you're planning to have kids or get married.
The comment about this being insane UNLESS some is salaried is also nuts. Newsflash: Salaried contracts are also required to state the weekly hours. And they state days off too. If it isn't like this the US, well, you guys up there have bigger problems than I thought...
And remember, if it is your scheduled day off and she tries calling you, you do NOT have to answer the phone. Some like to try and scare you into answering saying they have to be able to get a hold of you, b******t. It's your day off. If it's important they will leave a message or text you and you can decide then if you want to call back but you are under no obligation to answer work calls on your time off! I hate managers like this that use their power to bully and take advantage of other people because they were most likely bullied as a kid.
I've been a manager. The ONLY time I'd ask about weekend plans is the social gambit "Hey, for any cool plans for the weekend?" - and a no would not mean "available for work". I would also ask (in a group setting) "Who can take this shift", but that's an entirely different discussion.
I don't mind working for you but I don't want to date you. I'm not calling you or telling you anything I'm doing. Go find someone else cause you're not my type.
I'd be working part time hours irrelevant of her attitude. If she's that nosey, make stuff up .. going to a gimp festival, see sex party, bondage conference... she'll stop asking
I mean it's not a high bar but it's at least better than Amazon who don't even ask and just tells you that you are working your days off. Doesn't matter if you have plans, it's either come in or use your time off when they decide to call mandatory overtime. (Although they do atleast not try to completely screw you over in terms of benefits)
SHE SHOULD BREAK INTO HER BOSSES CAR AND HIDE IN THE BACKSEAT WAITING FOR HER TO CLOCK OUT, THEN WHEN SHE GETS INTO HER VEHICLE POP UP AND STRANGLE THE STUPID CU NT WITH A BELT OR MAYBE SOME PIANO WIRE THEN PROP HER BODY UP WITH THE GEARSHIFT STUCK UP HER BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE!
And this mentality is why women have so much difficulty moving up in most businesses, even when they're the most qualified person for the position. Are there women who act terribly because they are power tripping? Yes. Are there men who act terribly because they are power tripping? Also yes.
Load More Replies... If OP is regularly working 35+ hours and in the US, the employer is REQUIRED to offer health insurance, or will otherwise be penalized. This is part of the ACA (Obamacare) passed by ages ago, and sets "Full Time" by the governments standards at 30 hrs per week. OP needs to talk with the labor board b/c this sounds pretty illegal
Yes. Though that does only apply to employers with 50 or more employees.
Load More Replies... In Japan, if you're "part time" but work over a certain number of hours, you're entitled to partial benefits. It was to prevent stupid things like having people work 39.5 hours a week and not paying benefits.
I wish benefits were just a given. It's not like a part time worker doesn't need benefits. They aren't half a person. Not to mention, every job I've had still requires me to pay taxes, and fees for those benefits. It makes no sense that's it's not just a universal community provision.
Load More Replies... Why yes Friday is the orgy and the astroglide slip and slide. Saturday is the ritual in the woods accompanied by yet another orgy. No word if we get the slip and slide on Saturday tho.
Sunday is aftercare day. Can't do anything on Sunday
Load More Replies... That depends on where op is. If in Canada, you can work 40 hours a week and still be a part time employee. The extra hours are not overtime and there is no requirement for benefits or holiday pay. To be considered part time here, you only need to have guaranteed hours per week and depending on the province that falls anywhere between 8 hrs/wk to 20 hrs/wk
Load More Replies... I'm wondering if that "teenager who calls out every Friday" is even really scheduled. Sounds like manager thinks she's slick, and has set this up so she basically gets a full-time employee without having to pay benefits. I'd talk to the labor board, and maybe get a lawyer.
Completely illegal. Start an email and text trail and report her. I wish I had had this knowledge when I was younger. A lot fewer bad things would've happened to me if I had found my spine sooner.
Why can OP's boss not say no to the teenager who works for her? Are they dating? Good luck to you OP on your job search.
WOW. Am I the only Panda who has the balls to stand up for myself? The owner of the IT company I used to work for (I'm a bookkeeper and worked from home as needed, only going into the office on Mondays - for 5 hours) asked me to clean out the refrigerator & microwave and then could I "tidy up & vacuum" the office? "Um, that's a hard NO, Jon. I'm only here 5 hours a week. I have never ONCE used the refrigerator or the microwave, I dust my own desk and empty my own garbage can. And I find it extremely insulting that you would ask me to clean up after you and the other 2 full time male employees. I can only assume that it's because I'm the one with the uterus." He was stunned silent, but never asked me again.
Must be USA. There are situations in which the employers CAN tell you what you can and can't do in your off time. But they need to inform you of such before they hire you. Like some places of education can dictate what teachers do for extra curricular or extra jobs outside because they don't want a teachers face popping up in an adult video or swinging herself around a pole at the local strip club. But working retail...your boss can skip rope. She's just wanting you to work full time without the benefits. Check with the labor department to get their take on this.
I had a boss that basically tried to do the same thing to me at one of my old jobs. They had me listed as part time but scheduled for 40+ a week. The boss wanted me to tell them if I had any plans or whatever on my days off. I spoke to someone in the labor department and was told that they have absolutely no reason to know anything that I did when off the clock. When I told them I had plans when asked if I could work on my Day off they tried to suspend me but it backfired on them and they were fired as a result. I got promoted to their job in the end.
I see several comments above telling op to tell her boss off. I understand why you would want to but you probably should resist. Don't give grounds for termination. You always need to be respectful even if they aren't.
Some helpful responses when asked about personal time and plans: - Oh, it's not work related. - Just some personal plans. - I'm sorry, I'm not comfortable sharing personal information. - I prefer to keep my personal and work life separate. Fun responses: - This is enema and cleanse weekend. - Tantric sex workshop - Bank robbery - Porn star side hustle - Bible study and prayer circle - Coven meeting, blessed be - Swingers sex club with BF - Working your other job that you're not at liberty to discuss - Snipe hunting - Working on your labor law advice and employer review vlog You can take back your privacy. You may have to explain that while you've been open in the past, it's not something you're comfortable doing anymore, but you'll provide ample notice regarding availability. If necessary, tell her you recently learned about life-work boundaries in a labor law class you're taking.
Nope. Not gonna happen. Not now , not ever . What I do in my off the clock hours is not your business. Especially, if you're not paying time & a half, for working off schedule
Just tell her you have a new GF and she is really hot and you're going to banging her all weekend. I will bet she will back right off.
I used to ba a part time employee at Burger King that happened to work exactly 40 hours a week. Every week. I earned lees because of it, and got absolutely nothing outside of a sandwich each day. They didn't even have me work 8 hour days, I might work 10 days straight and still be considered part time. Why does it work like this?
Why do I never encounter these people? Is it because I look like I'd tear your head off and sh*t down your neck if you asked me to sacrifice an unscheduled weekend? Maybe RBF is a thing to have.
Plans for Friday, 10/21: 6-7: wake up and nestle with the cats. 7-7:15: Get out of bed, walk to the bathroom, pee, get distracted while on the toilet, get off toilet, wipe, flush, make sure the toilet has actually flushed. 7:15-8:00 Wash hands, wash face, notice pimple, squeeze pimple, wipe pimple juice off the mirror, take toothpaste and toothbrush out of medicine cabinet, squeeze toothpaste on toothbrush, brush teeth... And so forth for the entire day. She probably won't ask again. Look for another job.
This reminds me of a couple of things. One: on a job in the '90s, I worked with a guy who routinely worked 50 hours a week, and was made department lead (hourly 2nd-in-command to the manager) about a month after he was hired. The first holiday that occurred while he worked there was Thanksgiving, and he noticed that the check that covered the holiday included 4 hours holiday pay. When he asked HR to fix it, he was told "there's nothing to fix, you're a part time worker so you got part time holiday pay." How they categorized workers had no relation to the hours they worked. There was a lot of shady stuff happening there, and it was a big box with over 60 locations so it wasn't some mom-and-pop c**p. After three months on my next job, I was on the safety committee. In a meeting, the HR manager implied that our off-schedule activity was the company's business. I pushed back, politely. Three days later I crashed my motorcycle and was out for 3 months. Awkward. But I stick by what I said.
All I can say is this: when 20-somethings start VOTING and demanding action from government, the lack of benefits will change. Technically, you're not "powerless," but when 50% of those under 35 STILL FAIL TO SHOW UP & VOTE each and every Election Day, you make yourselves POWERLESS. Good luck. 🤞🏻
Nope right outta there this instant! The only time what you do during your off-time is the boss's/business is when whatever you're doing impairs your ability to work your schedule. Ex: hungover, high, being in jail, stuff like that. But if you go out and have a wild time (or whatever) and show up to work on time, ready to work, then ain't the boss's business.
The sad thing, in the US, is that people in management, especially low-level management positions, think their job is to babysit their team members underneath them and kiss the a*s of their superiors and that doing that will make them more valuable and benefit them in the long run by earning them promotions as well as higher salary. Here's a tip for anyone in management. You have one job and one job only and that is to make sure that your team preforms as best it can. The way you do that is by making sure that every member of your team has enough work to feel useful and appreciated but not stresses and in over their head. To make sure that there is as little friction as possible between all the team members. Your employees will work better and harder if you treat them with dignity and respect and make them feel supported and valued and not like children who need to be punished.
Demanding to know personal plans could be verging into illegal territory, especially if you're using your time off for medical reasons. The same way they can't ask questions about if you're planning to have kids or get married.
The comment about this being insane UNLESS some is salaried is also nuts. Newsflash: Salaried contracts are also required to state the weekly hours. And they state days off too. If it isn't like this the US, well, you guys up there have bigger problems than I thought...
And remember, if it is your scheduled day off and she tries calling you, you do NOT have to answer the phone. Some like to try and scare you into answering saying they have to be able to get a hold of you, b******t. It's your day off. If it's important they will leave a message or text you and you can decide then if you want to call back but you are under no obligation to answer work calls on your time off! I hate managers like this that use their power to bully and take advantage of other people because they were most likely bullied as a kid.
I've been a manager. The ONLY time I'd ask about weekend plans is the social gambit "Hey, for any cool plans for the weekend?" - and a no would not mean "available for work". I would also ask (in a group setting) "Who can take this shift", but that's an entirely different discussion.
I don't mind working for you but I don't want to date you. I'm not calling you or telling you anything I'm doing. Go find someone else cause you're not my type.
I'd be working part time hours irrelevant of her attitude. If she's that nosey, make stuff up .. going to a gimp festival, see sex party, bondage conference... she'll stop asking
I mean it's not a high bar but it's at least better than Amazon who don't even ask and just tells you that you are working your days off. Doesn't matter if you have plans, it's either come in or use your time off when they decide to call mandatory overtime. (Although they do atleast not try to completely screw you over in terms of benefits)
SHE SHOULD BREAK INTO HER BOSSES CAR AND HIDE IN THE BACKSEAT WAITING FOR HER TO CLOCK OUT, THEN WHEN SHE GETS INTO HER VEHICLE POP UP AND STRANGLE THE STUPID CU NT WITH A BELT OR MAYBE SOME PIANO WIRE THEN PROP HER BODY UP WITH THE GEARSHIFT STUCK UP HER BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE! BUT THOLE!
And this mentality is why women have so much difficulty moving up in most businesses, even when they're the most qualified person for the position. Are there women who act terribly because they are power tripping? Yes. Are there men who act terribly because they are power tripping? Also yes.
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