30 People Share Their Most Startling Moments Of Cultural Realization

Germany:

Sundays are for silence. No mowing lawns, no working outside, no loud parties, no annoying anoyne with your choices.

Sundays. Are. For. Silence.

And it's the best thing ever.

When a large Maori man asked to touch noses with me in greeting. The dude looked unhappy until I manned up and was the first to touch noses. Then he had one of the best smiles I've ever seen on a mountain of a man. It lit up the entire cultural center.

I’m a white dude married to a black woman. I had no idea about the whole culture of hair upkeep for black women. How much it costs. How much time it takes. How much it’s a connection point for her and other women.

Interestingly, what was a bigger adjustment had nothing to do with race. I’m an only child and she is one of five so obviously the family dynamics are quite different.

Next month we will be married for 24 years so I guess it’s all good.

My family (white) were terrible. I left them as a teen because of personal stuff and whatever. Absolute rearview. His family (black) are such warm people. Huggers! All of them! Omg, I love them so much. I didn't think I would ever have a family again and I absolutely had no idea that I would ever be so embraced by my husband's family. The biggest thing for me was the other shoe never dropped. They weren't being mean or pulling a prank, they were just nice, loving people. If any one of them asked me to go anywhere at 3am I'd go.

As a Swede, people here are in general pretty good at not interacting with strangers, looking out for themselves etc. I was in Thailand during the 2004 Indian Ocean earthquake/tsunami, and in the aftermath - so many Thai people were always helping me and my family, making sure we were well fed, had dry and not too dirty clothes to wear, helped us locate each other as we had gotten separated. I will NEVER forget how amazed I was. It was neither my first nor my last trip there, but the fact that they were so kind and thoughtful and selfless even during a time of crisis, it showed the world to me and it has given me a permanent faith in humanity.

We had this akward conversation with a family in Venezuela who we had invited over for dinner. They just wouldn't leave! My dad was doing the polite Canadian thing and mentioning that "we were tired", that "usually we would be in bed by now", that "it's been a long night and they probably want to get home", walking them toward the front door. And then we were stuck just standing there staring at each other. My dad finally just blurts out "Why won't you leave?! We're tired and want to go to bed!" And in frusteration they reply "Why won't you just let us go?!"

Turns out that in Venezuelan culture it's rude to leave on your own as an invited guest. The polite thing to do is to wait for your host to open the door and guide you out, but in Canadian culture it's rude to ask your invited company to leave and you wait for them to open the door and go on their own.

American currently in Tokyo (17th country travele) and it’s the most insanely efficient, logical, and beautifully chaotic city I’ve ever been to. Things just make sense. Stickers on chip and bread packages to reseal them if you don’t finish them, no one locks their bikes in the neighborhoods, no trashcans around on sidewalks because you just take your trash with you, toilet tank has a sink so you can wash hands while it fills toilet and flushes, and amazing public transportation. Just a couple of examples of an extremely organized society.

Croatia: it's a standard expectation that you clean the street outside your house as part of cleaning your house (at least in the small towns i was in -not sure about the cities). The cleanest streets I've ever seen and a real sense of communal civic pride.

I am white. My estranged family still implies that my Filipino husband is a bad person and is only with me for the money and Canadian citizenship. We have been together for almost 15 years. Married for 12. You think that if he was only with me for the Canadian citizenship, he would’ve left me 10 years ago after he became a Canadian citizen. I don’t even make a lot of money. He doesn’t even make a lot of money. But we are comfortable and extremely happy. There is a reason why I do not speak to my family anymore.

Moving back to the USA I had reverse culture shock. How large our portions are, how fat we are, how high our standard of living is with such an incredibly low quality of life, the massive income inequality, the amount of homeless, the magnitude of our selfishness, how little we discuss art and science, and how we discuss things in a very competitive way so that there needs to be a winner or a loser in every discussion instead of finding common ground.

I was pulled over by the cops in a Texan city for walking.

Everyone drives everywhere in Texas, so someone reported me to the cops for walking, not Jaywalking I might add, from one huge mall to another huge shop. They thought I had a mental illness. When I told them I was British and used to walking everywhere the cops eventually let me go.

Coming from Europe, the public transportation in USA is absolutely rubbish.

In Spain, no chit chat from the waiter. None of that "I'll be serving you" stuff that we hear in the US. Just "tell me." My introvert self loved it. I tell you, food arrives, I eat.

Probably the homelessness in America.
I was not prepared for the sheer number of beggars and people camped on sidewalks and parks in a US state capital. It was dystopian.

My partner is from California, I'm from Singapore. I think the biggest difference is popular culture --- everything from your childhood tv shows, the iconic music of your teens, even your education system, is going to be different. You cannot expect your partner to know what Mr. Rogers is/have watched XYZ cartoon. All assumptions have to be thrown out of the window

I think it's a good thing tbh, you start from zero. It makes you completely aware of how vast the world around you is, and I keep learning new things everyday. Just yesterday I learned that in California, there's a mascot called Smokey Bear that taught kids about forest fires. In turn, I told her about Singa the Courtesy Lion, which is a mascot to teach people courtesy/good manners. We had an entire discussion about mascots and teaching populations, and it was so fascinating. This happens so much that sometimes we can't stop talking to each other lol.

American here and I lived in the Netherlands for a bit. The first time I went to the doctor and he had actually read my entire chart beforehand.
Oh, and then the total for my visit was a few euro. That was a pretty big shock too.

Coming back to the US was hard for me. I lived on a tiny island for almost 5 years, where everyone was nice and friendly. Everything was slow and laid back. Moving back to California was hard! It’s so loud, so many people yelling and driving! The stores are so large and bright and loud! And ALL THE PEOPLE! It was overwhelming! Took a while before I felt comfortable again. Still miss the quiet and the kindness. I also miss the FRESH FRUIT AND FOOD!!

I was 19 and dumb. Finding a cockroach in my 5 star hotel in India. Freaking out and reporting it to the front desk and they're like "so what?" Then having my roommates from Florida tell me cockroaches are common even in expensive establishments in Florida. I'm from the north and buildings here are condemned for having cockroaches.

My hubs is black. I'm white. He was shocked at how my long hair found it's way everywhere. All over the shower? Check. Randomly around the house? Check. He was less than impressed on the last one. With me? That I couldn't run my fingers through his hair any ole direction without messing up his waves. I didn't know it had to be a certain way and he didn't tell me. He said he liked me rubbing his head too much to tell me I was messing them up. It wasn't until he was rocking a slight fro and I asked where those pretty lines in his hair went and he glared at me and was like, "you". He wasn't mad at me, he genuinely thought I knew and had just wanted to rub his head that badly. I was so clueless I didn't even know they were called waves.

Most of my in laws are really great…. And then there’s my brother in law and his wife. I am from Spain but he keeps thinking I’m from Mexico and likes to uses phrases like “wetback” and such while his wife is concerned that I should always have my “papers” in order in case we are ever stopped….umm I am a citizen here…..weird muppets….

White male, black wife. Spices and moisturizer.


Our spice cabinet runneth over, and we have a bottle of moisturizer in almost every room of the house. Now I also smell like Coco butter.

I moved from Europe to USA. How Americans idolize their politicians. These are public servants, YOU PAY THEM! your taxes pay them, THEY WORK FOR YOU!

I remember being 18 in on the beach in Italy with some other American friends. We had been there several hours, and I noticed a girl who wasn't wearing a top. I actually had forgotten that it was common for European beaches so I asked one of the older people that was with us, and he told me to be quiet and walk down the beach with him. What he was showing me was that when we weren’t talking people didn’t recognize us as Americans but as soon as we opened our mouth, many of the women around us started putting their tops back on. Made me realize pretty quickly, how being an American was perceived by the Italians.

I'm American and I had never left the country. When I traveled to Japan, I was seeing kids so often travel by themselves and leave their bags in places like at seats when they went to go order food, etc., without a worry of anyone stealing it. It was very surprising but also gave me a sense of safety I have never felt in the US.

The sheer amount of nonchalant waste that Americans do took me off guard. They just... leave the faucet running or throw away food if it doesn't look perfect.

In Sweden, it's a common tradition to watch Donald Duck (known as "Kalle Anka" in Swedish) cartoons on Christmas Eve at 3 PM sharp. This isn't just a casual thing - it's a national event!

Every year, millions of Swedes gather around their TVs to watch a specific 1958 Disney special called "From All of Us to All of You" (or "Kalle Anka och hans vänner önskar God Jul" in Swedish, which means "Donald Duck and his friends wish you a Merry Christmas").

Culturally, Asian men do not talk about their problems or stress. It's a sign of masculinity to just quietly bear it all so when things get rough whether inside or outside of the relationship, my husband just becomes really quiet. At first i thought maybe he's just really focused or motivated at the time. He doesn't express anger at all but at the same time he doesn't express ANYTHING at all. That's when i know something is up with him. Coming from a half Latino household, we are very loud and expressive especially when we are stressed out, worried, or angry. The Asian and Latino cultures are so opposite in so many ways but yet so alike it's quite a journey being married to an Asian man. I wouldn't have it any other way tbh. I think bringing cultures together through love is one of life's greatest things to witness and be a part of.

Canadian here: that Kiwis don't always wear shoes when out and about. I was surprised the first time I saw people barefoot in the grocery store, the bank, or walking along Ponsonby in Auckland. The movie theatre even had signs saying shoes were required.

Kuala Lumpur. I thought London was multicultural but the huge amounts of cultures, racial and religious communities, and historical context behind those communities in KL were mind blowing. There's a mix of South Indian, Chinese, Middle Eastern, British and Portuguese influence there.