Woman Offers To Host Cousin’s Wedding, Changes Her Mind After Bridezilla Shows Her True Colors
Interview With Expert
Putting together a wedding is no mean feat. Beyond the obvious organizational questions, there are the costs, stress and general bombardment of things that need to be done. So some folks, perhaps mistakenly, believe that they can simply use their family when needed.
A woman considered receding her offer to allow her cousin to host a wedding on her land when she would not stick to any of the rules and guidelines that were given to her. Later, she shared some sizable updates about the fallout of the entire thing. We reached out to OP via Reddit and will update the story when she gets back to us. We also got in touch with wedding planner Lisa Pleasant to learn more.
Relying on family for a wedding can be a double edged sword
Image credits: YuriArcursPeopleimages / Envato (not the actual photo)
One woman ended up disallowing her cousin from using her land when she ignored all the rules she was presented with
Image credits: Pressmaster / Envato (Not the actual photo)
Image credits: Unhappy_Cell1143
We reached out to a wedding planner to hear if the stereotype of a “bridezilla” was common or not
Bored Panda got in touch with Lisa Pleasant, the owner of Lisa Pleasant Events, a wedding planning company, and she was kind enough to share some of her experiences and opinions on the infamous “bridezilla.” After all, the internet is littered with stories of brides-to-be acting downright horrible and delusional, so we wanted to hear just how common this was.
First and foremost, we wanted to hear how common it is for a bride to go a bit off the deep end when it comes to planning a wedding. “Actually, I’m going to go a bit sideways here. While Bridezillas seem to get all of the spotlight from “reality” TV shows, they are pretty few and far between in my experience. Keep in mind, the demographic of our couples are relatively established, more mature couples. That said, there are other people in the mix who are, believe it or not, neither Bridezillas nor Groomzillas. They are what we kindly refer to as “Momzillas.”
“After a few years from starting my business, I decided to be light-hearted in my contract in order to break up the legal jargon of the multi-page (unfortunately necessary) sea of words that was essentially stressful and boring. I added a full page of clauses, each named after a former client who had unexpectedly warranted a ridiculous rule set aside just to apply to them,” she shared with Bored Panda.
“The majority? Momzillas. These ranged from bringing U-Hauls of items for us to set up, to disgracing their own daughters in public, to complaining to the photographer that their daughter had more photos in the end than they did when photos were given to the couple after the wedding.”
She shared some hilarious actual demands people had given for their weddings
Image credits: maxbelchenko / Envato (not the actual photo)
Lisa was also kind enough to share some real-life examples of people who were at least slightly delusional about the sort of wedding they wanted. “I’ll leave you with an example of a few clauses written after a few involved family members who shall remain unnamed.”
“The (name) Clause: Planners are not surgeons, but will make a reasonable call on whether a guest with a wine glass stem stuck near his temple should go to the hospital, even if this delays scheduled guest transportation by a few minutes.”
The (name) Clause: Client will respect Planners. Knocking over piles of chairs and throwing them at Planner’s feet is not the best start to a weekend.”
“The (name) Clause: If Client, family members, or guests exhibit inappropriate behavior at an event, including cursing at, yelling at, or otherwise degrading your planner, you will have to make the choice of who stays. Planners are 100% dismissed if said person does not either correct her/his behavior or leave the event. Planner is also not a bathroom attendant, including being given a Swiffer to go over the floors on the hour, refreshing given potpourri, or changing all of the venue’s toilet paper with Charmin Ultra Soft.”
So if you are in the market for a wedding planner who has really dealt with and seen it all, you can find more of Lisa’s work on her website or Facebook. And if you want to keep exploring weddings that went off the deep end, check out our previous articles on Bachelorette parties that went sideways or our article detailing people’s experiences with disruptive guests.
Readers were surprised by the cousin’s actions and needed some more details
Later, OP shared the first of two updates
Image credits: simbiothy / Envato (Not the actual photo)
Image credits: astrakanimages / Envato (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Unhappy_Cell1143
Most people thought she was NTA and OP gave a few more details
She shared one final update to the entire saga
Image credits: maxbelchenko / Envato (not the actual photo)
Image credits: prathanchorruangsak / Envato (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Unhappy_Cell1143
Readers were happy she dodged a bullet
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Why does a wedding often bring out the worst in people? When it's the 'happiest day of yourlife'?
For some people, nothing brings them more happiness than having their adult friends drunkenly p**s all over their family members’ garden.
Load More Replies...
If anyone wants a small wedding on my property I’ve got parking for one small vehicle but if you use that then the outdoor space is full, I’ve one spare bedroom but my daughter uses it Fri-Sun so a midweek wedding is ok, bedroom has one high bunk single bed but there are sparkling lights all around it. So don’t bring a car, don’t expect sleeping accommodation for two unless you are very friendly and limit your guest list to six people including the celebrant otherwise the parking space will be overcrowded. PS I live in Buxton, Derbyshire. Beautiful place but even in July / August it could snow so wrap up warm ok?
I must say the cousin & aunt are indeed toxic people. The apple truly don't fall far from the tree. Good luck to the guy that married her, he'll definitely need it.
Love to the husband. Well done to OP and the Mum. That cosuin is just trash.
Dodged a bullet for sure. Be sure to limit your holiday invites too to that side of the family. She will prob spit out like 5 kids an expect them to come and destroy your home an exterior. Good thing you stayed home.
Never work with friends and/or family really seems to hold up in wedding situations. But at least she has now cut some dead wood in her family...
“The uncle is very passive because the aunt (cousin's mom) wears the pants. He can't keep a handle on his daughter or wife, so I don't think he is to blame. If anything he probably tried to talk to them.” Can I disagree with this? He married a bad person. He raised a bad daughter (and presumably other dreadful children - it’s not clear how many family members were harassing the OP and her widowed mother). He stood by and failed to stop them. He too should be condemned. If his friends knew what he was doing (or failing to stop from happening) they should have taken him aside and told him he was a pathetic loser.
My husband & I moved to Springfield, OR in 2022. We bought a condo about 2 miles from Autzen Stadium, where the Oregon Ducks (football) play. His ADULT twin nieces are rabid fans. The more outspoken of the two INFORMED me that they would be staying with us for home games. I INFORMED her that NO - they would not. She badgered me & I stuck to my guns. At Easter that year, she started in again, going so far s to tell me my husband said it was okay. I knew full f*cking well he had not, so I called her out. Then she says, "Well, what if we just show up with our sleeping bags?" I told her I would wish them a nice day & slam the door in their faces. She finally realized that I am an even bigger bulldozer than she is and cannot be cajoled, guilted, bribed or manipulated. It's ironic, because today we're the best of friends and can laugh about it.
I would allow someone to have their wedding on my property, but not without a clear contract, a security deposit for damages and a party insurance in case of people having accidents. Even in Europe you can be held liable if you host a bigger event for a third party is someone happens to get injured and they sue you and the judge decided that your house was insufficiently secure. If someone balks at this, you know what you need to know. They're not grateful for having to pay a fracture than a venue would cost and don't care for your security and well being. Cut them lose and don't allow them at your home, because true friends would be glad you're helping them and agreeing to anything that's reasonably reducing your risk of getting saddled with costs.
...Sure, the pee killed the bushes, the dog choked on the firecracker person's lost fingers, several people stepped in poop (and it wasn't the dog's), the cops crashed the reception, the one bathroom flooded, half the litter was drunken bodies... but no one will ever forget that wild day and night!
Pretty sure her cousin's 'once in a lifetime milestone' will be a repeat performance.
Your cousin is a brat but you’re also seriously underestimating what it takes to host 80 people. One bathroom isn’t enough, so there would have to be port-a-potties. I assume “the weather isn’t a problem” means “it won’t rain” but a) if it ever does rain, it will be that day, and b) people also like shade. There was no way in the world your property was going to host 80 people without some rather serious disruption. That’s why professional wedding venues are a thing.
They didn't stick to your restrictions for hosting their reception and instead of compromising or rethinking things on their end, they attacked OP. That's the end of everything right there. FULL STOP. I wouldn't need to hear nor consider consider anything else, I'm rescinding the offer. Everything else they said and did is irrelevant outside of confirming my choice to be done with them.
"Speaks at a little bit above indoor volume". I call it the Dad Voice, and it's an honest-to-God superpower.😝
Hosting your relatives wedding at your house is such a terrible idea. Businesses have cleaners, and insurance, and mandated amounts of parking and bathrooms for a reason.
Her opinion of "tents and portable bathrooms" is a little snotty. They are very common at events, even fancy weddings. It's not a "circus vibe" as she snottily describes it.
Why does a wedding often bring out the worst in people? When it's the 'happiest day of yourlife'?
For some people, nothing brings them more happiness than having their adult friends drunkenly p**s all over their family members’ garden.
Load More Replies... If anyone wants a small wedding on my property I’ve got parking for one small vehicle but if you use that then the outdoor space is full, I’ve one spare bedroom but my daughter uses it Fri-Sun so a midweek wedding is ok, bedroom has one high bunk single bed but there are sparkling lights all around it. So don’t bring a car, don’t expect sleeping accommodation for two unless you are very friendly and limit your guest list to six people including the celebrant otherwise the parking space will be overcrowded. PS I live in Buxton, Derbyshire. Beautiful place but even in July / August it could snow so wrap up warm ok?
I must say the cousin & aunt are indeed toxic people. The apple truly don't fall far from the tree. Good luck to the guy that married her, he'll definitely need it.
Love to the husband. Well done to OP and the Mum. That cosuin is just trash.
Dodged a bullet for sure. Be sure to limit your holiday invites too to that side of the family. She will prob spit out like 5 kids an expect them to come and destroy your home an exterior. Good thing you stayed home.
Never work with friends and/or family really seems to hold up in wedding situations. But at least she has now cut some dead wood in her family...
“The uncle is very passive because the aunt (cousin's mom) wears the pants. He can't keep a handle on his daughter or wife, so I don't think he is to blame. If anything he probably tried to talk to them.” Can I disagree with this? He married a bad person. He raised a bad daughter (and presumably other dreadful children - it’s not clear how many family members were harassing the OP and her widowed mother). He stood by and failed to stop them. He too should be condemned. If his friends knew what he was doing (or failing to stop from happening) they should have taken him aside and told him he was a pathetic loser.
My husband & I moved to Springfield, OR in 2022. We bought a condo about 2 miles from Autzen Stadium, where the Oregon Ducks (football) play. His ADULT twin nieces are rabid fans. The more outspoken of the two INFORMED me that they would be staying with us for home games. I INFORMED her that NO - they would not. She badgered me & I stuck to my guns. At Easter that year, she started in again, going so far s to tell me my husband said it was okay. I knew full f*cking well he had not, so I called her out. Then she says, "Well, what if we just show up with our sleeping bags?" I told her I would wish them a nice day & slam the door in their faces. She finally realized that I am an even bigger bulldozer than she is and cannot be cajoled, guilted, bribed or manipulated. It's ironic, because today we're the best of friends and can laugh about it.
I would allow someone to have their wedding on my property, but not without a clear contract, a security deposit for damages and a party insurance in case of people having accidents. Even in Europe you can be held liable if you host a bigger event for a third party is someone happens to get injured and they sue you and the judge decided that your house was insufficiently secure. If someone balks at this, you know what you need to know. They're not grateful for having to pay a fracture than a venue would cost and don't care for your security and well being. Cut them lose and don't allow them at your home, because true friends would be glad you're helping them and agreeing to anything that's reasonably reducing your risk of getting saddled with costs.
...Sure, the pee killed the bushes, the dog choked on the firecracker person's lost fingers, several people stepped in poop (and it wasn't the dog's), the cops crashed the reception, the one bathroom flooded, half the litter was drunken bodies... but no one will ever forget that wild day and night!
Pretty sure her cousin's 'once in a lifetime milestone' will be a repeat performance.
Your cousin is a brat but you’re also seriously underestimating what it takes to host 80 people. One bathroom isn’t enough, so there would have to be port-a-potties. I assume “the weather isn’t a problem” means “it won’t rain” but a) if it ever does rain, it will be that day, and b) people also like shade. There was no way in the world your property was going to host 80 people without some rather serious disruption. That’s why professional wedding venues are a thing.
They didn't stick to your restrictions for hosting their reception and instead of compromising or rethinking things on their end, they attacked OP. That's the end of everything right there. FULL STOP. I wouldn't need to hear nor consider consider anything else, I'm rescinding the offer. Everything else they said and did is irrelevant outside of confirming my choice to be done with them.
"Speaks at a little bit above indoor volume". I call it the Dad Voice, and it's an honest-to-God superpower.😝
Hosting your relatives wedding at your house is such a terrible idea. Businesses have cleaners, and insurance, and mandated amounts of parking and bathrooms for a reason.
Her opinion of "tents and portable bathrooms" is a little snotty. They are very common at events, even fancy weddings. It's not a "circus vibe" as she snottily describes it.
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