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“I Rescinded My Acceptance”: 30 Times People Called Out Entitled Wedding And Party Invitations
It’s always exciting to receive an invitation to a party. Weddings, birthdays, bridal or baby showers are associated with celebrating and having a good time with your friends and family. Unfortunately, sometimes the demands in those invitations can make one’s eyes pop out in shock. There have been a fair share of stories about out-of-touch brides and their demands here on Bored Panda. We’ve even had some examples of ridiculous birthday party requests.
This time we selected the wildest stories from this Quora thread. To understand why some people think it’s okay to make these kinds of requests, we reached out to Wolfer & Co wedding planning experts. People shared the most outrageous demands they’ve seen for weddings, birthdays and bridal showers. Let us know which ones surprised you the most. And don’t forget to share if you ever received a party demand that made you roll your eyes. Or even worse!
This post may include affiliate links.
#1
1990. I'm married.
A male friend of ours is getting married and had asked my husband to be in the wedding party. He said yes. We had met his fiancée, Rachel, a handful of times but never got to know her on a personal level. Because of that, Rachel had suggested a get-together at her house prior to the wedding so that all the people who would be in the wedding could get to know one another. Makes sense.
A week later I got an invitation in the mail for the party, as well as a note stating:
“You are responsible for bringing 10 bottles of soda (must be name brand), home-made brownies for 25 people, 5 bags of chips (must be name brand). Each person can bring food to put on the grill but limited to a hamburger for each, or two hotdogs each, with a small piece of chicken. The rolls for these items have been assigned to “Luanne”, as well as all condiments (must be name brand).”
My eyes! I had to read it ten times to believe it was real! Bring our own food to fit on the grill? As well as other food?
My phone rang off the hook. Everyone was comparing their “YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS” list. She assigned one person to bring garbage bags and they were the clean-up crew. Another person was assigned decorations and linens.
I, along with several others, called Rachel to decline. Her response: “Okay. But you are still responsible for your list, so please drop those items off to my house ASAP”.
I told her that she is off her rocker.
Long story short, the party didn't happen. The wedding was postponed for over a year. It did finally happen. They divorced two years later.
Michael Largey 2 years ago (edited)
When people get all delusional, get all refusional.
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Lydsylou 2 years ago
Or family normally do this but definitely not to that extent. We have quite a big family but it's the responsibility of the host to bring meat and decor etc everyone else helps out with drinks and crisps or makes a dessert and other small things
Emmydearest 2 years ago
Well, yes, it's a potluck. Perfect for big family gathering. But if you host a party you are responsible for everything, unless the whole group decided to have a party and TOGETHER they agree to bring something.
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Mrs Irish Mom 2 years ago
Off her rocker is right, imagine what the wedding be like, bring flowers, food and champers aswel as 500 in a card and you can come to my special day... we all have a Rachel in our lives, no had a rachel, good riddence ro bad rubbish
Sunshine Lady 2 years ago
We're doing that with our friends, so it took me a while to get what's wrong. But not appropriate for people who you barely know.
Emmydearest 2 years ago
You can do it but everyone must agree beforehand. I usually do it with my friends but we decide if we want to have a potluck and what each has to bring beforehand. But usually potlucks are held when there's no occasion to get together. Like, it's a regular Sunday lunch, no specific occasion, great, let's all meet up, everyone brings something, not a big deal. But if you invite people for a specific occasion (birthday, anniversary, etc) you are the host and you are responsible for everything. People might bring something, like wine or dessert, but all the rest falls onto the host.
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Doodles1983 2 years ago
To be honest, I like the idea of setting it up and dishing out responsibilities. I would be happy to help. What sucks here was that there was no invite to ASK who would mind doing/supplying what and that no attendance still meant you had to do your bit. It’s the entitlement that would have ticked me off.
Sally Signup 2 years ago
It would have been so much easier to arrange to meet at a restaurant.
JayWantsACat 2 years ago
How you then go on to still marry this person after this is beyond me.
Page intentially left blank 2 years ago
The groom probably saw her insufferable behavior long before this. Woe to him
Weddings are probably the first occasions that come to mind when we think of unreasonable demands. Some newlyweds-to-be think that getting married equals special treatment. Bored Panda reached out to wedding planning experts at Wolfer & Co to chat about entitled brides and their sometimes unreasonable requests.
“We do feel it's always important to consider the comfort and convenience of your guests when planning a wedding,” Wolfer & Co’s Jamie Wolf says. “Unreasonable demands or omissions can create unnecessary stress and confusion for everyone involved – the couple, guests and vendors alike!”
RELATED:
#2
We made an unusual request for our wedding.
We were a bit older (37 and 43, first wedding for both), and doing pretty well, so we decided to have a nice event. We both had lots of friends by this age, so it was to be pretty big. We both loved children, didn’t have any at the time, and had been to too many boring weddings, where the guests had all been told no children were to attend.
We decided to turn that upside-down, and informed all of our guests that had children that they were not to hire babysitters, bring the kids, and if they showed up without them would be sent home to get them. Our venue had a loft that we set up as a kids area, and we hired a couple young ladies to help make sure the kids were safe and attended to.
We had 185 guests, about 40 of whom were children, from 3 weeks old to teenagers. It was delightful. There was exactly one “disciplinary incident” when a boy, about 6, threw something and almost knocked over a glass of wine, and thus had to be told not to throw things any more, please.
So that was the unreasonable demand — bring your kids, or else! Still the best day of my life.
Martinna Jaap 2 years ago
This sounds like the most perfect wedding to me and was how mine was 18 years ago.
GB 2 years ago
@Martinna my wedding was also 18 years ago. Not only did we welcome everyone's children (including our photographer), but we held our reception at a children's Fairyland -- a small story-book oriented children's park. It was absolutely magical. We even hired someone to run the merry-go-round all night. It was a truly joyous occasion!
Load More Replies... cerinamroth 2 years ago
I believe that weddings are a symbol of "community". I used to love going to a wedding as a kid. But this was before sodding Instagram made everyone want things to look perfect at all times. Kids are part of that community. Don't take them to cocktail parties, but weddings? I really don't understand that!
frederick clause 2 years ago
My wife and I (late 40s at the time) attended a wedding several years ago where we ended up at a table with a bunch of teenagers at the reception. The bride and groom were very apologetic about this. It was actually the best time we have ever had at a wedding. The kids were very engaging and entertaining.
Mabelbabel 2 years ago (edited)
I was an older first time bride at 50, and my husband had 3 children that he has full custody of-bio mom isn't around. We had a party in a local gastropub, and my stepchildren (all young teens at the time) invited all their friends. The DJ was playing lots of music from the 1970s and 80s, which is when we were that age, and the adults were showing the teens all the dances that we used to do, like the boys doing the Madness "nutty boys" March. And nobody probably has a clue what I'm on about, but it was brilliant.
MezzoPiano 2 years ago
Yes! I never understood child-free weddings. At every wedding I've ever been to, the kids are the life of the party and bring so much joy!
Emmydearest 2 years ago
In Italy it's very common. I've been to at least 20 weddings and none of them were child-free. Usually kids are put in separate tables and have their own, simpler (and less expensive for the newlyweds) menu. Sometimes there's a babysitter or an entertainer available because weddings last all day and kids get bored easily. But they are usually welcomed. Also, considering that more often than not, kids' babysitters are relatives of their parents, like a younger cousin or a niece, they would be invited to the wedding as well so how could they stay home and babysit?
Alexandra 2 years ago
You, dear Sir or Madam, deserve an Mention in the Queen's Birthday List!
Lame Llama 2 years ago
All the kids were invited to our wedding too. They were the ones on the dance floor.
Nadine Debard 2 years ago
We did this (bring your children/safe space/ hired people to take care of children/special kids menu/ small gifts, ballons, colouring books) but we were only 70 people, so 12 kids. Parents absolutely loved this.
#3
My former Mother-In-Law, a very sweet, prim and oh so proper lady who rarely had an unkind word for anyone, received a wedding invitation from one of the children of her very long time next door neighbor. The invitation described a remote hill top wedding venue over looking the Pacific, pretty much all family and friends lived in Detroit, at some strange hour that I don’t remember. This was to be followed by a somewhat challenging hike to a remote camp of some sort for the reception. At the end of the invitation they included the following, (paraphrasing) “Since we know that most of you will not be able to attend we request that you give us cash to help pay for our dream honeymoon in…” an expensive island somewhere. My MIL was flabbergasted to say the least. I was there when she read the invitation and heard more than a few “Oh my’s” as she reread it to make sure she actually understood what they were asking.
The reaction of her children and others present was what you might expect but she didn't say anything more, tucked the invitation away and went about her business. A couple of months later I asked her what she had decided to do about the invitation. She said she sent them a very nice set of custom monogrammed bath towels (no returning those) and smiled sweetly with a slightly evil glimmer in her eyes.
Barbara Kelly 2 years ago
Rosalind Russell's character ("Auntie Mame") in the movie of the same name (also a book) is my role model in later life. "Good times galore at 84!"
Lupita Nyong'heaux 2 years ago
kMa, with a nice, fancy, elaborate embroidered border that, upon closer inspection, is actually a buncha d***s.
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Cathy 2 years ago
Oh. My. It is a lovely idea though, going remote. But then have a smaller event too if you're going to invite the elderly...
Catharina Geerts 2 years ago
I wonder what the monograms were, hehehe. Heaven knows. "A dirty mind is a joy forever"
Nitka Tsar 2 years ago
And now I am wondering if they chose that location to prevent too many people from coming, but still getting money out of it. Wow
It’s easy to make fun of demanding brides-to-be and assume they’re just insufferable people in their daily life. In reality, it’s the culmination of stress and pressure. Jamie agrees: “The transformation into a ‘bridezilla’ is rarely about ‘bad people doing bad things’. It's more like a perfect storm of stress, expectations, and emotions.”
“First off, wedding planning can bring out a different element in a lot of people,” the wedding planner argues. She invites us to be more understanding towards people going through wedding planning. “It's a high-stress situation that you and your partner may not have dealt with before. Suddenly, you're not just you, you're a bride, and that can feel like a whole new identity.”
#4
I have gotten some pretty unreasonable requests from invitations to weddings. The two that were the most demanding, in my opinion, were the two that expected their guests to fly to foreign countries to attend their weddings.
It's wonderful when two people want to get married on a beach in Jamaica. However, to expect your guests to take time off of work, buy a plane ticket, incur the cost of lodging, and buy the clothes of their theme is absolutely ridiculous. This couple was enraged that they had only two guests at their wedding!
A wedding is for the couple getting married. Guests are invited to share in their experience. When a couple puts a burden on their guests to attend their wedding, it's no longer for the couple, it's about the couple. I don't mind theme weddings where a costume needs to be purchased or even a strange, outlandish bridal registry. Having to lay out five thousand dollars to attend is a bit overboard for me. But, that's just my opinion.
Mrs Irish Mom 2 years ago
I think that would be everyons opinion because who can afford 5 grand now days
Zoe Vokes 2 years ago
This is okay if everybody you know is rich. Otherwise it’s insane of the couple to think their guests can justify that expense.
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WindySwede 2 years ago
"Hi the wedding is on the moon. Alyssia, you bring the potato chrisps but not Lays, to much air in the bags, must be in a tube or vac pack. Kornelious you bring the hot dogs. Luanne you will be bringing the popcorn, the muchroom type not the butterflie! All goods must be packet 10 h before departure, you buy tickets to the spaceship at spacepen-is-here.vip.com"
cerinamroth 2 years ago
Live in Germany, don't really know the couple but they are vaguely related to my husband, received an invite to a wedding in Mexico. We are living off supermarket loyalty points to buy food at the moment and we have two kids. It's not going to happen!
CT 2 years ago
Years ago, my then-boyfriend's friends invited us to come to their wedding in Portugal (where part of the groom's family lives). From Switzerland. For me, it was absolutely out of the question to fly there and back for a weekend, I find it ethically indecent and ecologically criminal. In the end, we chose a more expensive option..., but more interesting, a 2-week interrail trip with the wedding in the middle. I still think that if the bride and groom want to share their wedding with their family and friends, they only have to have 2 parties (one in each country), no need for a huge thing. It’s not up to guests to shell out for other people’s weddings.
Scotira 2 years ago
Friends of ours did exactly that! They married (and lived) in Austria. So his direct family (mom and sister) an my husband and I (my husband was his witness) came to the ceremony and party in Austria. Then they made a second party for all the family and friends in Switzerland.
Load More Replies... hitex 2 years ago
If you want your guests to attend, pick a venue within 30 miles of the majority of guests! Otherwise you risk having only a few guests attend - it shouldn't cost any more than a few gallons of gas for a guest to attend a wedding - gifts are also optional & a simple 'congratulations' is appreciated. You want ppl to celebrate your marriage & that shouldn't come with expectations of gifts or anything in return
OneHappyPuppy 2 years ago
I have attended 2 destination weddings - and both were not destination weddings per se, but the country the bride was "marrying into". Both had expenses paid for by the bride and groom/respective families and still most guests that could afford it decided to "pay them back" in monetary wedding gifts. If you want a destination wedding, make sure your loved ones can afford to be there. Else it's an elopement.
Michael Largey 2 years ago
Destination weddings are the best! You always have a perfectly rational excuse for not going.
Lame Llama 2 years ago
My husband and I lived in Europe and had our wedding at my home country (10+ hours of flying from where we are). Majority of our friends in Europe attended, we even had guests only there for a weekend. BUT, and a huge BUT, we all make good money and my home country is a popular tourist destination.
Mario Strada 2 years ago
My policy is that I won't attend any wedding more than 3 blocks from my house.
Mamza Paulse 2 years ago (edited)
my moms fam is from South Africa, my dad is American. they had a big 200 person wedding in sa, and a smaller reception in the us. I think thats a good solution.
#5
My best friend asked me to be her bridesmaid roughly one year before her wedding, which I agreed to do. I must point out that I am Italian and so is my friend and in Italy you don’t have bridesmaids but a “witness” for the bride and one for the groom.
In the year leading to her wedding, my husband left me and my 6 year old son (plus two dogs!) to go back to the uk (he is English) to find a job, which he did immediately. Previously we struggled for a good year relying on family for helps. Once he settled, I decided to join him with my son and dogs. The moving date was April 21 and her wedding was on May 1st. I must point out that I was completely broke at that time as a move to another country costs a lot of money, I was working part time and my husband spent almost a trying saving up for a home in England.
A few weeks before the big day I ask her what gift she wanted and she said: “well, it is tradition here that the witness of the bride and the witness of the groom buy the wedding rings”. (I later found out that this is not tradition at all!)
So I asked what she wanted me to do next and she said:” you will need to come to the jewellery shop so we can choose our rings and you pay for mine, while the other witness will pay for the other”
Remember I was broke but I was willing to fly back a few days after the move to attend the wedding and make her happy.
When I asked her how much the budget was she said she wasn’t sure, but around 350 Euros., maybe more.
I said I could not afford it and she said “ok no problem but you can’t be my witness anymore as it’s tradition! Another friend of mine agreed to buy me the ring and she will be my witness. But you can still come to the wedding”.
Needless to say I didn’t attend the wedding and haven’t spoken to her over the past 5 years. We grew up together and, I thought, we were best friends, she treated me and made me feel so small and insignificant.
They divorced less than two years later.
Mario Strada 2 years ago
I could add a bunch of Italian swear words here, but for today I'll refrain.
Sherry Moore 2 years ago
Please share I would love to learn some Italian 🙂
Load More Replies... Emmydearest 2 years ago
Well I'm Italian as well and yes, originally the wedding rings were purchased by the groom but recently it's become more and more common that the witnesses buy them. And the newlyweds give them an expensive presents in exchange. So I get the 'tradition' thing. However, the woman who wrote made clear she couldn't afford them and that she and the bride were friends since childhood. If I were in their shoes I would totally understand and have her as my witness anyway. Witnesses are supposed to be very attached to the spouses, they're usually their best friend or a sibling, so what's more important? That they buy you the rings or their presence and friendship? A witness shouldn't be chosen for their financial means, they are supposed to be very important people for you.
Gabriele Alfredo Pini 2 years ago
A brief search says that in Italy the groom must buy the rings (called "Fedi") for the wedding. The witness of the groom is responsible to bring them. There are lot of jokes and movies scenes based on the witness forgetting the rings!
Marcellus II 2 years ago
In italy, JUST LIKE IN THE REST OF CHRISTENDOM. Absolutely nonsense, why witnesses would buy rings for the bride?!
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Tracy Creamer 2 years ago
I have the perfect response to these types of brides. I would text them. Hey I just found the perfect dress to wear to your wedding and it fits what you want to a tea I can’t wait to go buy it so here’s my cash app and you can send me the blank amount it’s going to cost. It was such a good bargain, if you can get me the cash soon, I can go ahead and get the dress and make sure I don’t lose it so that I can look so perfect for your wonderful perfect wedding.
#6
The bride included a list of acceptable guest attire. She wanted all women to wear sleeveless maxi dresses. I explained to her that I don’t do sleeveless as I broke my elbow as a child and I am overly sensitive to its mild deformity. I also explained at just a hair under 5′0 a maxi dress looks horrible on me. I was told “I don’t care - this is a beach wedding, you will be in the sun and it will be hot.”. I further explained due to previous sun poisoning I can’t wear sleeveless as I need to keep my shoulders out of direct sunlight. She was so insulted I was uninvited to the wedding. Win for me - loss for her as I unfriended her and heard most women wore what they wanted and she was livid that they deviated from her instructions.
Hphizzle 2 years ago
Don’t tell me, a wedding GUEST, what exactly to wear to your wedding unless you’re going to be the one paying for the new clothes.
Tracy Creamer 2 years ago
I have the perfect response to these types of brides. I would text them. Hey I just found the perfect dress to wear to your wedding and it fits what you want to a tea I can’t wait to go buy it so here’s my cash app and you can send me the blank amount it’s going to cost. It was such a good bargain, if you can get me the cash soon, I can go ahead and get the dress and make sure I don’t lose it so that I can look so perfect for your wonderful perfect wedding.
Load More Replies... Trish 2 years ago
It's severe sunburn. I had it once, and was sick for a week. Dizziness, nausea, loss of consciousness ( I was unfortunately standing at the time), swelling, blistering, etc. I wear long pants now, regardless of the weather.
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xolitaire 2 years ago (edited)
I would have done the same thing as OP. As someone with red/auburn hair and super pale skin I go from ghost to lobster in under 2 hours of direct summer sun, even with level 100 sunblock. In most cases I also get sun allergy, which is not fun. Forcing someone to stand around in the heat is a health risk. So nope, not gonna happen.
Barbara Kelly 2 years ago
Three little words : "I don't care" is the bride's MO...does not bode well for marital success.
Amanita Virosa 2 years ago
I had sun poisoning years ago. Did not burn or peel but the itching was horrible. My Grandfather said put vinegar on your skin. It worked and smelled like salad but it stopped the relentless itch.
PolymathNecromancer 2 years ago
Somewhere in their lives existed an environment to cultivate this stuff -- what was it?
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KieLeaHar 2 years ago
Unless it’s the whole don’t wear white, cream, ivory or formal gowns, you are NOT telling me how to dress. On a beach, in the sun, you need coverage. I for one would even throw on a hat, because I run hotter than most people and I’m not willing to sweat buckets to appease some clownzilla over something that wouldn’t affect her in any way… Also, maxi dresses aren’t for all shapes and sizes so I guarantee there’d be people saying ‘no’ immediately.
Tracy Creamer 2 years ago
I have the perfect response to these types of brides. I would text them. Hey I just found the perfect dress to wear to your wedding and it fits what you want to a tea I can’t wait to go buy it so here’s my cash app and you can send me the blank amount it’s going to cost. It was such a good bargain, if you can get me the cash soon, I can go ahead and get the dress and make sure I don’t lose it so that I can look so perfect for your wonderful perfect wedding.
“Then there’s the drama,” Jamie goes on. The environment other people create rarely helps either. “It's not just the bride being dramatic, it's everyone around you,” she says. “Your mom's arguing about centerpieces, your bridesmaids are acting bonkers, and your fiancé has decided to become an ostrich and stick their head in the sand. It's like a ripple effect of drama that makes you start to question your sanity.”
#7
This answer is really going to date me, but so be it. I received an invitation in which the bride and groom asked for money only. They wanted to take s 3 month tour overseas and wanted the guests to pay for it. It was suggested that you give $100 per person if a friend, $250 per person if a bridal party member and $500 if you were family. I was told they expected it whether you attended or not. I just thought it was rudely presented as a demand not a request. They expected us to give them $500 because our 3 children were invited. I haven’t even had a tour of Europe!
Brenda 2 years ago
NEVER ask for money! It's just tacky and you look greedy. And the amounts are outrageous!!
Raumpfleger 2 years ago (edited)
Depends I'd say. My wife and me wrote something like: "As we already merged two complete households we ask you to not gift us anything that for. If you nevertheless want to gift something, a small contribution to our honeymoon would be highly appreciated." I hope it sounds as polite in my bad english as it was written in german ;-)
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arthbach 2 years ago
This is INCREDIBLY culturally dependent. There are many cultures where money IS THE ONLY GIFT that is given at weddings.
Barbara Kelly 2 years ago
Cannot upvote this enough. The difference that I see is that no $ amounts are specified, and people give an amount that is comfortable for them.
Load More Replies... Cathy 2 years ago (edited)
Asking for money (for your honeymoon) is kind of normal here. But you do not suggest amounts and you certainly do not expect it.
Emmydearest 2 years ago
It's very common to ask for money instead or presents here in Italy. I still find it very tacky. I'll comply but I won't like it. The fact you already own everything cause you've been already living together is one more reason to demand for nothing and ask donations for a charity of your choice. In the past giving presents made sense: people used to live with their parents until marriage so they literally had nothing. Presents were a way for guests to help the new couple build their life together. Now it's not necessary anymore cause they usually live together for years before getting married so they ask for money. No, thank you. If you need money why having a wedding in the first place. You don't need to host a huge wedding with reception, an expensive dress, flowers, etc. Just go to a church or the city hall, get married and that's it. Why should I fund your life choice? Makes no sense to me.
Load More Replies... Mrs Irish Mom 2 years ago
What Entitled delusional people, im not going to make it but here is my hard earned 500 cash 🙈 not
kath morgan 2 years ago
In this day and age when people are marrying after setting up home, it’s ok to say something about preferring cash over gifts. We had to do it, because we were moving overseas. Stating amounts is very tacky though, be happy with what you get.
GB 2 years ago
The bride and groom shouldn't ask for anything. It's up to the guests to ask a member of the bridal party (eg MOH or mother of bride/groom) if the couple has a registry. If they don't have a registry, there are many traditional wedding gifts that are common to give, such as picture frames or towels. I wouldn't dream of asking for anything but a person's attendance. A wedding is a celebration and a party thrown for those we love, as much as it is for ourselves. It shouldn't be a money-grab!
#8
I was the one making the request, but it wasn't on the invitation. Having attended many weddings and other events from my wife's family, I knew there would be certain family members that would show up to ours in just T shirts and jeans. Not acceptable. So in the weeks leading up to the wedding, I went to have tea with the aunts and cousins from her fily that loved to gossip and spread a rumor that some of my friends from the army that had been in special forces were going to stand at the entrance with paintball guns and shoot anyone who showed up in t-shirts and jeans. Not surprising, not one showed up in casual clothes and a few people who I had expected to kept asking me where the special forces guys were.
Not-a-Clue (she/her) 2 years ago
I showed up to my own wedding in T-shirt & jeans. So did my husband 😊
Kim Kermes 2 years ago
On the other hand, 9ne of my Army buddies wasn't going to our wedding because he literally had nothing but T shirts and jeans (his luggage was lost on the way to our unit). I told him that he was our buddy, we wanted him there, and his best jeans and T shirt would be fine. He was too shy to borrow, being a new guy. I also passed the word that if anyone so much as looked at him funny, my wedding gown wouldn't stop me from dealing with them. He may have ironed his jeans and T shirt.
Alexandra 2 years ago
Any wedding is about compromises. You can ask your guest to wear this or that, but when your guests can't meet your request, you should accept that. On the other hand, a guest to a wedding should show respect for the event by showing up nicely dressed. I take it these jeans-and-shirt people just didn't want to bother dressing nicely for your wedding?
PolymathNecromancer 2 years ago
It would seem so, as OP didn't say anyone actually had any mechanical/tangible/logistical problems actually wearing something a bit spiffier.
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Amanda 2 years ago
Why can't people wear what they're comfortable in? I genuinely don't understand what difference it makes to the wedding if some guests ate in casual clothes?
White Sauce Hot Sauce 2 years ago
It's a formal event, with formal attire. No one's forcing you to go.
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Alfred Wessex 2 years ago
Threatening to shoot people who don't behave the way you demand? Awesome.
#9
I’ve got one. I was invited to a baby shower. The invitation said “no cards, bring a children’s picture book and write a message for the new baby and mother on the inside cover.’ Okay, that’s a little bossy, but I can deal with it. It also said “only use clear wrapping paper for your baby shower gift” and gave a list of places where you could get this clear paper. That seemed odd, but I thought “okay,” and I just did it.
Here’s where it got demanding. I arrived at the baby shower with my required picture book with message inside, and gift wrapped in clear paper. I finally understood why. You see, when a gift is in clear paper, the Mommy-to-be doesn’t have to bother opening it to see what your brought. Okay, that seemed really weird — a baby shower where the Mommy-to-be doesn’t actually open the gifts in front of the guests.
So I sat down with my gift (as I was directed by the lady giving the shower) and then I was handed a “thank you card, envelope, and a pen.’ I couldn’t imagine why. We were all then instructed to put our name and address on the envelope so the Mommy-to-be wouldn’t be burdened by having to address them herself. Okay. Then we were told to open the preprinted thank you card, which had a line for us to fill-in what we had bought as a gift! So it said “Thank you for very much for your gift of ___________________________. Our new little one greatly appreciates you.” Yes, we were being asked to fill out our own thank you cards for gifts the Mommy-to-be was not even going to bother to unwrap or look at during the shower.
I also later found out from one of the other “participants” that by wrapping them in clear paper, it made it much easier to return unwanted, un-needed, or duplicate gifts directly to the store, because it showed the gift had not been opened.
They had a sheet cake, a punch bowl of punch made with frozen mix and ginger ale, and that was it. There was no gift opening or acknowledgement, no baby games, nothing. We all just filled out our thank you cards, put our gifts on or around a table, and then the guests talked with each other, and then we left. I don’t think the Mommy-to-be even said a word to me.
And the last straw? The Mommy-to-be never even bothered to mail those thank you cards she had us address and fill-out.
Ruth 2 years ago
Silly goose - you were supposed to put a stamp on the thank you note and mail it to yourself! =)
Zoe Vokes 2 years ago
Or maybe they were supposed to take them as they left to save her mailing them?
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quentariel 2 years ago
As a book lover the idea of bringing picture books with individually written messages for the baby sounds absolutely brilliant, everything else however...
Bubs623 2 years ago
They actually have pre printed insert cards you can slip inside the invitation. My daughter used it - the note basically says 'please bring a book for our new baby. It can be new or well loved, we just would love it if you'd put your name inside. If you want to write a message, that would be great!' She got the most lovely books and some really funny ones. It was a coed shower and one cousin brought his well loved copy of Stephen King's 'The Shining.' It sits right next to all the other books and little one tends to go straight for it when picking out a book to read! lol Also; for clarity, no other gift was expected. Some people brought other gifts from the registry and some didn't and it was all good.
Load More Replies... Zoe Vokes 2 years ago
Me too. Mommy-to-be seems like an incredibly lazy and entitled person. Unless she hires a nanny then she is going to be in a world of pain looking after a baby. Sleepless nights, feedings, changing nappies, attending kiddy play dates… (Not saying that she will need to do all those things as the woman, but it’s kind of unavoidable for both parents).
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Mrs. Ginger McSarcasm 2 years ago
She missed the "bring a stamp and put it in a mailbox" instructions
Zoe Vokes 2 years ago
Maybe they were supposed to take them as they left to save her mailing them.
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Kelley Clough Mountain 2 years ago
Most of this is pretty odd except not opening the gifts. I went to a baby shower where the future mom didn't open the gifts. I thought it was great! No sitting around pretending to be delighted with her gifts, plenty of time to mingle with the other guests.
White Sauce Hot Sauce 2 years ago
A story book with a message for the mom & baby inside actually sounds nice and more personal than a generic paper card. Wrapping it in plastic would probably keep it safe until it can be unwrapped by the child, but still see with it is. Everything afterwards is where it went off the rails.
In some cases, other people feel entitled to have an opinion about your special day. Jamie says family members and sometimes even guests have certain expectations. “Everyone in your life has a vision of what your wedding day should look like, and they're not shy about sharing it,” she adds.
#10
So I got invited to a birthday party of a woman, a friend at that time.
The venue was a 5-star restaurant.
I was humbled and loved her for the invite.
A few days before the party, she called and insisted on me bringing everyone, including my children and husband to the party.
I was hesitant.
If I were having a party at such an expensive place, I would not invite spouses and families.
I refused.
She insisted, and I had to give in.
I bought an expensive gift for her, just to appreciate her gesture and efforts.
It was a cold November night, an extreme cold weather alert in place I remember.
We arrived on time.
The servers were running left right and center, keeping up to our demands. The food was good.
I tried to limit ordering, assuming it would be a burden on her.
She kept assuring me, "It's okay-order what number 1 wants" etc.
As the party came to an end, a server showed up with a leather folder and extended it to me.
I looked at my husband, he gestured to me to open it.
Inside was the bill of our food.
A few hundred bucks.
I looked at my husband again.
He knew the look on my face.
He quietly motioned me to pay it.
Did I have a choice?
Edit: Just so I am clear, it was you pay for your own food, just that no one knew it was until the servers showed up with bills. I love pay-for-your-own-food hangouts. But when you 'invite' people for birthday parties and then insist on bringing anyone for your own fun, try to make things clear before-hand. Sure I had money and I could pay. What if someone could not afford to pay and was caught off-guard? Because I know some were!
Zoe Vokes 2 years ago
Not only should she have mentioned money earlier but choosing to go to a 5 star restaurant is unreasonable. Maybe she could have gone to a 5 star restaurant with her immediate family, but then later had another meal with friends at a more reasonable place.
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Lotten Kalenius 2 years ago
Of course you inform your guests if they are expected to pay themselves! When I got married me and my husband were poor students. We had the wedding dinner at our favorite restaurant. All our guests were informed to not bring wedding gifts, but instead pay for their own food and drinks. Everyone was happy and it was a lovely evening! (We got some gifts anyway, but it wasn't our expectation. We just wanted our family and friends to attend.)
DarkViolet 2 years ago
As soon as I read, "a friend at that time," I knew it wouldn't bode well. Hoo boy, the lengths some entitled people will go to float on other people's wallets!
Panda 2 years ago (edited)
This has happened to me. I was surprised when I got the bill but since I was in a foreign country (the Netherlands) I assumed it was customary there. They were just acquaintances of mine and I was surprised when I received th invitation. I went to honour them since they had thought of me. Never again!
Exotic Butters 2 years ago
She knew what she was doing. If she thought OP knew she wouldn't have been telling OP that it was ok for #1 to order what she wants.
Purplescales 2 years ago
And to overrule your attempts to keep things reasonable! that is an Ex-friend
Dorian Gabriel 1 year ago
Did anyone else get the impression her husband suspected this from the beginning lol
Patricia Young 2 years ago
We were invited to a friend's MBA graduation celebration at a restaurant. We were excited to celebrate her and brought a nice gift despite our current financial hardship. The couple is well off and the graduate is from a very affluent family. We were given a menu with 3 options for dinner, no prices were listed. After the party, the friend sends a text letting us know the cost for our portion of the meals/gratuity/room rental. It was nearly $200. We didn't respond and didn't send a check. We now politely decline their invitations.
#11
My sister in law (now my husband's brother's ex wife), text me one night in the middle of our wedding planning (and by in the middle I mean deposits for everything had been paid and invitations were being made), and she asked
“Is your wedding date set in stone already?”
(This is a gist of how the conversation went)
Me: “Yes it is.”
Her: “Well, like have you already paid deposits? You haven't sent out invitations yet right?”
Me: “For the most part we have, we just need to talk with *insert pastor's name*”
Her: “Do you think you could change the date to another weekend? The 25th doesn't work for me.”
I literally had to read it over and over again. I read it out loud to my (now) husband. Had she really just asked us to change OUR WEDDING DAY because it didn't work for HER?! I don't know why I was surprised, she was and still is all about her.
Her: “My friend is thinking about getting married that day and I want to attend both.”
So her friend's hypotheical wedding is reason for us to change ours? Yea, no.
Me: “Sorry but we picked that day and things are already paid for.”
And that was that. I think she text me again but I don't remember what she might have said.
Oh and that friend she mentioned, still isn't married.
WindySwede 2 years ago
"Could you please not wear white, and not a dress? I was planning on testing out my white wedding dress!"
Full of Giggles 2 years ago
For the last 30 years, my parents have thrown a huge Christmas party for family and friends. It’s always been on the second Saturday in December. My cousin got engaged a few years back and his fiancée was deadset on having a Christmas theme wedding. However, the only date her dream venue has available was the day my parents have their party. Fiancée was afraid most of the family would want to attend my parents party over her wedding so she begged my parents to change the date of the party just this once. My parents eventually caved and let her have the date. The thunder c**t then had the audacity to invite everyone in the family but my parents.
Amy Smith 2 years ago (edited)
Move my entire wedding, for one guest who isn't in the hospital, recently suffered a bereavement etc, at hardly any notice, after booking and paying for things... well sure sweetheart, where would you like me to send the bill for rebooking everything, because it's on you
Shelby Moonheart 2 years ago
My brother suggested I change my wedding date so they could attend. They lived overseas and was coming to the states for their honeymoon. Mom and Dad went to their wedding overseas but the rest of the family didn't. I understood but didn't change my date since I didn't want to have my birthday and wedding in the same month.
Mrs Irish Mom 2 years ago
My sister got messy drunk and when i told her at my wedding to calm down and take it slow she told me to stop ruining HER day 🙈
Jacqueline Hayes 2 years ago
"Go right ahead and tell your friend that the 25th works. Have fun at her wedding." Later, "I never said that I was going to change my wedding date. I just said to have fun at her wedding. We had fun at ours. Ask others how it was since you weren't there."
#12
I was chosen as a bridesmaid for one of my friends. However, the bridesmaid dress that she chose was way too expensive (I was a student in University and money was tight). In addition to that, I had to pay for the package of skin and hair treatment prior the wedding day at the spa that she chose. And on the wedding day itself, I also had to pay for the hairstylist and the make-up person that she ‘provided’ for us bridesmaids. Those things are seriously expensive! And she didn’t allow us to do the hair and makeup ourselves as she was afraid that we won’t look good in a pictures. Also, she explicitly said that she expected us bridesmaids to gift her something from the list of the wedding registry that she had prepared and that stuff was waayyy beyond my means . So nope...sorry girl, not gonna do that.
Brenda 2 years ago
My BFF wanted a specific dress for bridesmaids, kinda expensive. She chose to pay for them instead of not having some of us in the wedding. That's how you do things
Mabelbabel 2 years ago
I was an older bride (50-a complete old biddy!) I wanted to celebrate a marriage, not just a wedding. A wedding is just one day, and getting yourself into horrendous debt for one day seems ridiculous to me. I had 2 friends as attendants, and they both already had dark blue formal dresses and were happy to wear those, so that was the "theme" The groomsmen wore ordinary suits that they already had, and I got them blue silk ties to match the dresses. Micromanaging what your guests wear, or making demands about your attendants hairstyles, make-up, shoes or visible tattoos seems to be a big red flag-the worse the micromanaging, the quicker the divorce.
LH25 2 years ago
I agree for the most part. Too many focus on the wedding day, not the fact that they will be married when it's all over. I did go to one wedding that was quite the production, including a violin performance from a young niece of the bride. They were very happy for years.
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Brian O'Grady 2 years ago
In Ireland, the bride and groom pay for bridesmaid dresses, hair, makeup all that kind of stuff, say for groomsmen, suits, haircuts. Your asking the person to be your bridesmaid/groomsman if they're kind enough to do it why should they be out of pocket. Never understood why in the US the bridesmaids/groomsmen have to pay for it.
Alexandra 2 years ago
What is this with bridesmaid's dresses? If a bride wants her maids in specific dresses, she should pay for it. I swear, there are brides that just pick and choose what "tradition" is best for them. If you want to have a "traditional wedding", that's okay, but buy a Miss Manners or any other etiquette book so that you're aware of what a "traditional wedding" actually entails. Apart from that, why in the name of all that's good do you think it's okay to force your friends to pay for something that they can't afford? Who does that to a real friend? What happened to being grateful for people wanting to celebrate an important event with you?
Tyke 2 years ago
I was given 1 month's notice of the wedding and was asked to be a bridesmaid. One month for clarity meant... no pay day before the wedding. I had just paid for a holiday so made it clear when I accepted that I had little money. I was told to buy a specific poo-brown hideous dress. A couple of days later we were informed we had to wear cream shoes and a few days after that we were informed we had to have cream handbags. I asked the MOH if there were more hidden expenses as I couldn't afford it and she pretty much shouted at me and told me to suck it up.
Tyke 2 years ago (edited)
Had to be at the bride's house for 7am - the wedding was at 3pm. Hairdresser did my hair (bride paid for it), he pulled my hair back so tight and so hard I couldn't move my head the next day and had neck pain for 2 weeks. I was informed I had to carry all the gifts back to the Bride's house (no car, just on foot), despite me having treatment for severe RSI... and was berated for changing into flat shoes to do that (I even found a cheap pair that matched the poo dress). A couple of months later I was berated for not having bought the happy couple a gift.
Load More Replies... Some guy 2 years ago
My wife's niece and all of her bridesmaids had their hair dyed the same color (a darkish red) for her wedding. I thought it was creepy AF.
Nice Beast Ludo 2 years ago
I was just about to say...6 clones in matching hair and dresses? Creepy as hell. I would just have them show up in a color and style they choose that matches nicely
Load More Replies... hitex 2 years ago
WTF?! I paid for my bridesmaids dresses (assortment of 5 styles of same material from same provider - they could choose style they felt most comfortable wearing)...I also paid for their hair & makeup! No skin or hair treatment required. They are not gonna wear that dress again! Pay for it!
Corinne 2 years ago
In the UK the brides maids are usually children related to the bride and groom.The bride buys them little dresses and they usually get a present such as a locket. They all look different but that is charming...and..in years to come people will know who they are when looking at the pictures, not just a random bunch of young women who can afford to attend.
Huddo's sister 2 years ago
My mum's bridesmaids were her nieces and the dresses were sewn by her and my grandmother.
Load More Replies... Emmydearest 2 years ago
Whatever the bride requires from her bridesmaids, she should provide or pay for. That's it. Want me to wear a dress identical to the other bridesmaids, that I'll never wear again and that probably won't look good on me (because which dress shape and color can possibly look good on 6 other people with different body shapes and complexions?). Want me to have a complicated hairdo and makeup made by a professional? Great, you pay for it. 👍
What exactly are unreasonable requests and where should one draw the line? Forget Me Not has a list of things that can be considered unreasonable to ask of your wedding guests, but they can also easily be adapted to any kinds of events. Naturally, every situation can be different, but here are some general guidelines on what can be considered delusional.
Firstly, it’s asking for money. Party guests should not be asked to cover the costs of the said party. While it’s true that any kind of party or event is financially stressful, it ultimately falls on the shoulders of the planners, not the attendees.
#13
My cousin “B” believes that she is the queen of England, and all of her subjects must do exactly as she bids. Yeah, you know the type of person I am talking about. So anyway, “B”, who is always broke and doesn’t have a pot to piss in, finally gets engaged. We are all happy for her. She’s had plenty of failed relationships- partly because she is nuts, partly because she isn’t sure what type of guy she is going for, and partly because she had picked some real jag-offs. Okay so we all hear she is getting married and we are awaiting news on the location. All of a sudden she notifies her whole family here in Pennsylvania that she and her new fiancé are moving to Florida. This seems like a difficult undertaking given that “B” doesn’t even have her own place or furniture since she bounces around between friends’ and relatives’ homes. Everyone tries to be as helpful and positive as possible so they can be happy, hopefully settle down and “B” can FIND A JOB. The family were all prepared to assist them with the wedding as much as possible. Everyone offered to take on a different job (I was making the flower arrangements). We made a huge mistake in believing that they would be grateful with a nice little wedding where everyone takes care of one aspect and she chooses the details. Since they have very little money I couldn’t fathom what else would be possible. Moving on now. A month ago “B” emails and tell us a freaking bomb. Ready for this… they are having a destination wedding to Barbados. They found the perfect venue down there who will take care of putting it together for her, allowing them to stay in the states. I guess this type of wedding is common for the resort. They have wedding packages that only require you to make a few choices and show up which sounds lovely… sounds lovely I mean for people who have that type of money at their disposal. I was in so much shock thinking of how in the hell they could pull this off with no income that I almost overlooked a tiny little detail at the end. It went like this- “Every couple will be paying $3000. That will cover your trip down, two nights stay, and a percentage of the wedding. Just think of it as a nice little Barbados getaway! While we do love kids, please make arrangements for them to stay home as we would like to keep it adults only. You can send cash or check to my address and I will give it to the resort. Ladies- please buy or bring your most “beachy” sun dress in coral or pink and men can wear Bermuda shorts and turquoise polos. If you don’t have anything that matches you can message me. I will pick it out for you and send you a link to the website for purchase. Also, if anyone would be kind enough to gift us just a little more in their check my fiancée and I will be able to extend our honeymoon. Can’t wait to see everyone there!” Yep. Needless to say we are unable to go. Maybe it was a good deal but I wouldn’t know since we don’t have money for vacations like that and I love my kids more than her. Even if we did I don’t think we would go. Just reading that email made we want to vomit and I still can’t believe she actually sent that s**t out to the family knowing none of us are super well off. Best of luck to her and her soon-to-be husband -- I do wish them lots of happiness. I hope one day she becomes aware of her selfishness. Maybe one day she will apologize for all the money I wasted making flower arrangements for her little Pennsylvania wedding that she snubbed. I don’t know if everyone would consider her request unreasonable but for me it sure was bold.
Stephanie Did It 2 years ago
Even if I were financially able to support this CB's debacle, I would 100% not send her a penny. I would make arrangements with the resort after seeing the contract, if it existed. Did the Barbados wedding happen?
HelluvaHedgehogAlien 2 years ago
You know what’s really bad about this? The request about Bermuda shorts and turquoise polos
Justin Everett (Tehashi) 2 years ago (edited)
Very delusional cousin there. But holy wall of text. Please learn what paragraphs are and how the return button works.
JB 2 years ago
It is quite a bit but, personally, I’m pitifully grateful for capitals, almost perfect punctuation, proper sentences, and solid grammar. No use of their for there or vice versa. I’m especially impressed OP knows where to put the apostrophe when indicating ownership of multiple people (friends’ and relatives’ homes). Well written OP!
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Cory Tollman 2 years ago
I think I'd be glad that the wannabe bride moved to Florida. With everyone's finances how they are described it should be the rare instance that I might ever see her again.
Azure Adams 2 years ago
This one needs an update followed by a "...and I haven't spoken to her since then. We aren't friends. I wasted too much on her..." type of message.
#14
An invitation from a former friend’s granddaughter stated at the bottom, “No gifts valued at less than $100 will be accepted. See registry at ___________. Cash preferred.
How would they know whether it was $98 or $102? Does that $100 include tax, and shipping, if ordered online? At the time, I was not working and had a small fixed income. $100 might as well have been $1000.
I declined the invitation and simply sent the new couple a card wishing them well. I guess that might be why Grandma and I are now former friends.
hitex 2 years ago
Right?! Upvote for understanding true intent of wedding
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Starry starry night 2 years ago
Anyone you invite to you wedding should be loved enough not to bring a preset You should know them personally and know their limits. Having a wedding just to get presents devalues the vow you are making
Nice Beast Ludo 2 years ago
Ok so no gift then... that's fine. What would they do anyway? Open at the door and decline the gift entry?
Richard Michael 2 years ago
Guess she wasn't really your friend in the first place if this is what ended it.
Apachebathmat 2 years ago
My husband and I got married near Christmas so we asked guests to make toy donations to the cities childrens hospital if they wanted, we didn’t need anything and didn’t want anyone feeling they had to get something
Michael Largey 2 years ago (edited)
"I'm sorry, but I could not find any gift over $100 that truly expressed my level of regard for you."
Sara Wilson 2 years ago
Those r the kind of people that send invites to EVERYONE knowing most won't accept, since they don't actually know them, and hope to just get the fancy gift/cash
#15
We were invited to attend, and made plans to be at the wedding, which was across the country. We’d talked to the groom several times, and told him we were making a family trip of it. It was planned out to attend 3–4 months in advance. Less than a month prior, the groom told us we couldn’t bring our kid, and that the recommended hotel for attending didn’t have any services to watch our child. We’d booked tickets, bought clothes, and made arrangements to be there. They recommended that maybe we could leave the child, unattended (who was 2 at the time), in the room for the ceremony, and then I should stay with the child while my husband attended the reception. We didn’t go to the wedding, or take that trip. If the invitation had noted that no children were to attend, it would have been acceptable but that was not the case.
Zoe Vokes 2 years ago
If it was refundable then I’d probably cancel too and saved the money for something else - a holiday more fun for their child, improvements for the house, into savings in case needed…
Load More Replies... WindySwede 2 years ago
leave a 2 year old alone?! Is it Stewie and Brian Griffin to baby sit??
Exotic Butters 2 years ago
Wonder why they didn't take the trip they paid for and skip the wedding
Zoe Vokes 2 years ago
Because it might not have been a great place to attend as a tourist. If it was refundable then I’d probably cancel too and save the money for something else - a holiday more fun for their child, improvements for the house or put the money into savings in case it was needed.
Load More Replies... LB 2 years ago (edited)
Formal invitations shouldn’t have to note that children are not allowed, as OP seemed to expect. The “note” is in how the invitation is addressed. Is it addressed including the children’s names or to The Smith Family? Then the children are invited. Is it addressed to just the parents? Then the children aren’t invited. Either the groom was too stupid, meek, or inattentive to correct OP’s misunderstanding until one month before the wedding or the groom thought OP was making it a family vacation with a plan for childcare during the wedding and didn’t realize until one month before the wedding that they intended to bring the child to the ceremony. Either way, OP shouldn’t have assumed that their child was invited unless the child was included in the invitation.
My O My 2 years ago
See, and that's the reason why there should be a note if children are welcomed as guests
Load More Replies... Asking for too many favors can also be considered tacky. It’s okay to ask your baker friend for a nice birthday cake, but it’s not okay to expect them to do it for free. It should be common sense to either compensate your friend for the said work or count that as their gift to you.
#16
When one of my best friends from high school got married, she asked me to be a bridesmaid. I was pretty honored, and said yes. Then she told me I had to order a dress in a size 16. I was a size 2 at the time.
Her reasoning: she was portly, as were her bridesmaids, and if I was up there in a gown that showed how slim I was, I wouldn’t “match” the bridal party.
The dress was very low cut, and the only straps a loop of fabric on each side, like this, in lieu of sleeves. The skirt was much fuller.
What was I supposed to do, walk down the aisle holding my arms over my head, dragging two pounds of fabric? How would I walk with all the fabric tangling between my legs?
I rescinded my acceptance.
Mrs. Ginger McSarcasm 2 years ago
Just use a bunch of ducttape to tape the extra fabric of the dress together so it doesn't fall of
WindySwede 2 years ago
or just made from duck tape? https://www.ecosia.org/images?q=duck%20tape%20clothing
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Jennifer_Crowley_Luci 2 years ago
How did the bride herself even remotely think that would "match" any better???
Nice Beast Ludo 2 years ago
I'm watching Lost in Translation right now... why don't you pull it tight with claw clips like Bill Murray's suit and tie the side up into a bun with a scrunchie of your choice?? Hahaha not tacky at all and definitely wouldn't divert some attention... it would divert ALL of the attention. Good choice on staying out of it.
Zoe Vokes 2 years ago
I need to watch Lost in Translation again. It’s been about a decade since I saw it.
Load More Replies... Sunshine Lady 2 years ago
Slim girl will look slim in any dress, I don't get it. Like if I wear size 2 somehow I will look slim...
Heather Talma 2 years ago
Order it in a 16 then bill her for the tailor to take it down to a 2
Sara Wilson 2 years ago
Or was the bride hoping she would gain weight to make them all feel better?
Huddo's sister 2 years ago
When I was a bridesmaid and I was at least 4 sizes smaller than the others, do you know what the bride did? Made sure they paid for the dress to be altered for me, because I was smaller than the smallest size they had! Having a dress that doesn't fit, and looks bad, affects how the bride is viewed, far more than having one bridesmaid who looks smaller but is wearing a dress that does fit!
Zoe Vokes 2 years ago
The bride obviously has severe body confidence issues. I don’t know why she didn’t invite OP as a guest and still have her attend. Why ask her to be a bridesmaid and then do this to her?
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Antoinette Maldari 2 years ago
I think the OP may have exaggerated a bit on the dress size. A size 16 dress would be like wearing a tent on a size 2 body. Either it's is more of a size10 body in a 16 dress or a size 8-10 dress on a size 2 body.
Load More Replies... #17
My father remarried. I didn't have a lot of time getting to know my step-family as I was doing grad school in a different state. However, I DID do my best to get to know them, and be as supportive, loving, and compassionate as I could be. Some years after he remarried, one of the girls my stepmom raised got married. I received my invitation to attend the wedding reception which was held a few weeks after the actual ceremony. My father, very ashamed, had already told me only 'immediate' family could attend the 4-5 day wedding celebration at a swanky bed and breakfast.
Mind you, neither groom nor bride had had a job for years. And by swank, I mean swank by Wine Country, CA standards. Yes, my father paid for the whole thing. He hated doing it! Yes, I was not invited for the 4+ days of wedding celebration. Not even invited to just attend the ceremony because it was for 'immediate' family. Oh, and the friends who were ‘like' family who did the whole 4+ days. Needless to say, I did not attend the reception. Nor did I buy anything off their registry.
StumblingThroughLife 2 years ago
The father should DEFINITELY be ashamed. Wow! What a kick in the teeth.
Zoe Vokes 2 years ago
Yeah. He’s made such an effort to be supportive of his step children that he even paid for their wedding (although possibly against his will), yet his new wife has clearly made no effort with his child and doesn’t even consider them family.
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RabidChild 2 years ago
My father's 2nd wife arranged a similar situation for one of her daughters. My father paid for the entire thing (I was not invited.) When he and his lovely wife arrived home after the festivities, she thanked him by handing him divorce papers and she & her daughters cut him out of their lives completely. There are gold diggers everywhere.
Cory Tollman 2 years ago
I would have liked to see how the divorce proceedings went after that.
Load More Replies... #18
Destination weddings. What possesses brides and grooms to believe that most of the people they know can afford to fly off to some exotic destination. And that all of their employers will have no problem giving them the time to do it. And that travel like that won’t be an issue for older people expected to attend … or young people who now have to figure out what to do with children for multiple overnights. I’ll toss one in for my pet owning friends … they’ll have to figure out what to do with rover and kitty for multiple days. Even a destination a couple hours away can be a problem for some people. Those with no transportation, older people who can’t ride that far. I’d have to say that the destination wedding is one of the most selfish and self serving wedding ideas I’ve heard of in my life.
JCM 2 years ago
I don't think destination weddings are selfish at all. Expecting everyone to drop the money to go is. My sister got married in Jamaica because that it was they wanted. They knew none of the family could afford to go and were not put out in the least. When they got home the held a reception to celebrate their new marriage. I also had a friend get married in Florida and a lot of us lived in Canada. They asked everyone if they would be able to attend and then started making plans. They had no expectations and accepted the people who could and could not go. I went and it was a blast. I was picked up from the airport. Driven where ever I wanted to go by those who had driven there and all in all the bride and groom were just happy with who showed up for their party.
Karl 2 years ago
I’ve turned down all destination weddings/stag dos down without hesitation. Gross entitlement.
Robin DJW 2 years ago
me too, even if I can afford them. If I ever go to xx-destination-xx it will be a vacation just for me, no strings attached to anyone.
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Kristy Marion 2 years ago
I don’t think anyone is expected to attend a destination wedding. I’ve been invited to a few and the Bride and Groom completely understand by doing so it will be a smaller wedding. I only attended one and made a vacation out of it, everyone else also extended their stay and we got great rates at the resort. It was a really fun week.
White Sauce Hot Sauce 2 years ago (edited)
I'm not an asocial grump like most on BP. I like destination weddings and will go when I can, because I like the people I associate with and the travel opportunity. It's also a way to keep the guest list number low.
Purplescales 2 years ago
I had a cousin who intentionally had a destination wedding so nobody would be able to attend
Catharina Geerts 2 years ago
One of my sisters had a perfect solution. She was marrying an Italian, from the deep south of that country. Well, they had their Church wedding + party there for the Italian family, and the Legal wedding + party for her family, all living close to our home. It was perfect in more than one way, because in Italy, marriyng for the church meant (at least at that time, don't know if it's still the same) being married for the Italian law too
Dianellian 2 years ago (edited)
I had friends coming toVietnam for my 50th (we often organise trips away together. Whoever can come, comes, no pressure). My now husband proposed a few days before my bd so we snuck in a wedding the day before. Fantastic day! It helped that a friend had lived there and she introduced me to a friend of hers who wanted to become a wedding planner, so everything was easily sorted. Our cocktail bill for the entire 4 days for anyone who asked, or was offered a drink by us, was less than $1000. We didn’t realise the photographer had another person working with him so we had so many fabulous unposed shots taken before the setting sun on the beach. I love Vietnam! 10 years later and we all still talk about that surprise wedding and trip fondly.
Cool Guy 2 years ago
I had a destination wedding. My husband's family lives in Western Asia and he and I live in Europe. They were not able to easily come to us due to visas being very expensive, and their country is not considered safe for certain foreign travellers so we chose a country in between which was a popular and cheap holiday destination. We prepped our friends and family a year ahead of time that we would be going abroad. We also kept the guest list small and held a party back in our home country so that people didn't feel predsured to come abroad with us. Overall it was a lovely experience and we got celebrate with a blend of traditions from both our backgrounds. It was also possibly one of the only times mine and my husband's entire families were together in one place so it was very special :)
Let’s talk about dress code. Yes, it’s very nice to later look at pictures where everyone is dressed to the nines. However, keep in mind that not everyone might have a “black tie” suit or a ballgown at their disposal. The same goes for costume parties – always keep in mind that people might not have your required outfit on hand.
#19
I feel like I have a winner. There was a company wide email sent from one of the ladies in the office. I knew her but rarely spoke with her as she was in a different division and her work was completely unrelated to mine. The below is not word for word but is basically the same drift. While on vacation in Las Vegas last week (some guy nobody knew) and I got married. As no one knew about the wedding you were not able to attend or send a wedding gift so we set up a website with a link to our registry. (A list suggesting specific items was included) If you would prefer to send a cash gift a link to enter your credit card information is also included. We are going to have a honeymoon in Vegas in a few weeks so we would also like donations for money to gamble with. Thank you very much (new couples names) I never heard any discussion whatsoever about the email. I am assuming it went nowhere.
ThéveNinja (she/her) 2 years ago
“We would like donations for money to gamble with.” How did those words end up in a sentence together this way?
hitex 2 years ago
We want to throw your money in a garbage can & set it on fire!
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Dodo (they/them) 2 years ago
I genuinely can't fathom this level of entitlement. I have zero hope of ever getting married but I'd struggle to even invite people I know, let alone make demands of gifts and money for *missing* the ceremony!
Mrs Irish Mom 2 years ago
Yes, let me gamble all the hard earned money you make 🤦♀️ say shes at the blackjack table with all of her 5 dollers
Sue User 2 years ago
The worst for me was a colleague, whom I occasionally had lunch with , was getting married. She was Indian, so the wedding was back in India, not in USA. I got an invite. The confused look on her face when I asked about accomadations made me realise it was just a gesture and she didnt really expect me to go.
kath morgan 2 years ago
Donations for gambling? I am 6000% less inclined to give cash if they tell me up front they intend to pîss it away.
Barbara Kelly 2 years ago
Company policy should have prohibited sending a company-wide email like this to co-workers. If not, Human Resources (or the bride's supervisor) should have disciplined her. It is in everyone's interest to prevent a toxic workplace situation.
Nice Beast Ludo 2 years ago
Yes, PLEASE take MY hard earned money and gamble it. Here is my credit card information. Are you F*****G INSANE?
#20
This was the tackiest thing I’ve ever seen. I was not involved in the wedding, but you certainly couldn’t miss it. Back around 1979, the daughter of a prominent local couple was getting married. They owned a big hotel, so were well off and built a new house in a very prominent place in town. The daughter got married. However, after the wedding there was a huge article in the local paper about the wedding. This was not the custom, so I’m not sure if they paid to have the article put in there or what the deal was. It described in great detail everything about the wedding including how much every thing cost. For example, “the brides mother Mary, wore a beautiful gown, costing $3,000.” It went on to list how much everything cost. I couldn’t believe it. Then it went on to say how each guest was required to bring a money gift of at least $500. Which today would probably be about $1,500. I don’t know why anyone would attend a wedding like that. It was the tackiest thing I’ve ever seen.
CultOfBambi 2 years ago
I think we may have found the original trend-setter!
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hitex 2 years ago
Why do people put a min value on a gift?! Some of best gifts at my wedding were less than $25 & my expensive items on my registry were $150!
Mila Preradović 2 years ago
Wanna hear something more tacky? In some rural parts of my country a priest would read from the altar, how much did each guest put in the envelope as a gift 🫣
Load More Replies... Some guy 2 years ago (edited)
I was a kid in the '70s, and in that era was taught that discussing the prices of things, like asking how much other people's stuff cost, was completely out of line. (Later, yuppies would make a point of bragging about the cost of their houses, vehicles, etc., but hell, that was the '80s for you.)
#21
I guess this is not ‘unreasonable’ but it was pretty arrogant. I attended a baby shower for the daughter of a close friend. The word went out ahead of time that any cards given should be ‘current in style’ and not the old-fashioned mushy baby cards that seemed like they came from the 1950s. Yeah.
Additionally, the expectant mother lived in California but the shower was at the mom’s house in Atlanta. So the instructions were that all gifts should be shipped directly to the California address, and a print-out of the gift included with the card. Sigh. OK.
This was the daughter of a close friend, so I ordered and shipped a very nice gift. I forgot to get a card until the evening before the shower. I looked in my stash of pre-purchased cards, and oh,dear. The only card I had on hand was pink and mushy with a little baby being carried by a stork. Good enough. Not going out at 10 p.m. to buy another one. I printed out the picture of the generous gift and placed it inside the card.
When the expectant mother opened my card, you could see her body language change - she stiffened up and looked displeased. The stupid card was more important to her than the gift.
Hphizzle 2 years ago
By show of hands, who actually really cares about the style of cards they receive???
Doozle bug 2 years ago
I hate receiving cards. They all end up in the recycling bin. Worse if there is no surname. How many sues are there?
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Kar Red Roses 2 years ago
… I’m sorry they were all out of bespoke contemporary cards(?) some people, wow just wow
RapidUnscheduledDisassembly 2 years ago
She was probably going to do some cutesy craft thing from Pinterest and didn't want anything "old" ruining the "aesthetic". 🙄
When planning any type of event, invitations are an important element of that process. It may seem like unnecessary fuss, but a proper invitation can inform the guests of a lot of basic information. Robin Bickerstaff Glover writes for The Spruce that every invitation to any kind of event or party should include minimal instructions: purpose, time, place and style.
Additional information in an invitation can include whether or not the guest might bring a plus one. Dress code is also an important piece of information. If a guest arrives at a formal party wearing jeans, awkwardness is guaranteed not only for the guest themselves, but for the event planner as well.
#22
A few years ago I received a very pretty invite to an acquaintance’s wedding. It arrived in a white box with pink border, opened to the invite tied together with a big pink ribbon bow and included the RSVP card, picture of bride and groom and other extra items. It weighed a veritable ton.
A few weeks before the wedding, another friend of mine called. She is much closer to the bride than I am so I mentioned seeing her at the wedding. She laughed and said the invites were the oddest thing she had ever seen. I thought she meant all the pomp and prissiness of them. Found out she received a different invite than I did.
Hers was a standard Shutterfly type of invite in a plain envelope. Her invite looked a bit like this (See picture).
Yep, she received a gift request, not an invite. never did find out why I received an invite and the closer acquaintance to the bride did not. I did not attend the wedding or send a gift. Neither did my friend.
WindySwede 2 years ago
The more I live the less I understand how people can do how they do. At least how entitled some are.
Rostit. . 2 years ago
I think its a mix of greedy wedding planners, trying to get the bride as much free stuff as possible and instagram/tiktok brides thinking they are entitled for tons of gifts/cash
Load More Replies... hitex 2 years ago
My hunch is OP was wealthier than closer acquaintance so OP was invited bc OP could provide more expensive gift
Green Shoe Laces 2 years ago
Yeah, definitely seems like the "invited" guest was sent the expensive invitation because bride assumed she would bring/send higher quality gift.
Load More Replies... Kar Red Roses 2 years ago
We are proud to announce blah blah wedding and invite you… To send us a GIFT! 🤭
#23
I have had two bat-schitte crazy insane invitations. But first, my own wedding and my sister’s.
I had a reverse destination wedding.
I moved away from home after college to live near my then-fiance who enlisted in the military while I finished college. I called home two weeks later and said “We’re getting married Thursday!” Mom (who was not exactly surprised) said, “Yay! Why not get married HERE Thursday since both sides of the family are here, including about two dozen of your relatives over 80 who can’t travel and the only people who will have to travel are the bride and groom?”
That made sense to both of us, so that’s what we did.
Since it rained, we got married in my grandmother’s living room instead of her flower gardens — and that woman was yard-proud; it was a showcase. I found a pretty knee-length (business but dressy) dress I liked at Penny’s. He wore his class As. I asked my honorary aunt and sister to stand up with me. My honorary aunt made my cake. Burnt the first one (ha!) and stayed up late making the second one — spice cake with chocolate icing because that’s what we liked and we weren’t having two cakes which would go to waste. She even dotted the outside with chocolate chips, which made it looked like a deranged spiked chocolate collar, I laughed, but you can’t have too much chocolate. All my relatives came, all his relatives came, it was a crowded house. Everyone brought a dish to share. We did potluck.
(For a rehearsal dinner the night before, my MIL brought in Buddy’s BBQ to her house, which as it turns out, I can’t stand and she knew it, because she’d known me for three years at that point. It had come up before. I didn’t make a fuss, I ate the sides. Didn’t really matter in the grand scheme of things: my belly was full, I was having fun with my groom-to-be and talking to all these people who were wishing us well.)
My MIL had insisted we pick out a “china” pattern. I picked out a nice, durable stoneware. No silver serving sets, no crystal, and no china we’d never use anyway. My MIL wanted to send out announcements, which I didn’t understand was a gift-grab until later or I wouldn’t have done it. I just thought she was “fancy” and I was too wrapped up in getting married to the man I loved to argue with her about anything. We got a few pieces of my practical stoneware, from her friends and more distant side of her family, that I still use 30 years later. And one of her friends took the announcement and embellished it beautifully by hand and had it set in a silver frame — which I thought was perfect and thoughtful, and I said so each and every time I spoke to them.
My side of the family sent gifts like hand-made quilts and hand-knitted afghans like the ones on my bed and couch right now. Things for a hope chest. Things that they spent hours of love and care making and that would last generations. Someone took pictures, I don’t remember who. Someone even videoed the whole thing, on VHS, it was that long ago. Mom paid for my Penny’s dress and I wore it regularly to work (since it was a 9-to-5 kind of style) for over a decade. Had happy memories every time I put it on. We stayed in a lovely bed and breakfast for a night that his parents paid for. And it was a lovely property, filled with antiques. We didn’t spend a lot of time looking at antiques, though (ha!) We were wrapped up in each other. Then we went back to North Carolina because he had to report for Monday morning muster.
I do NOT understand bridezillas. I also don’t understand the idea that you should ask friends to go in hock to attend your joyous occasion. It eludes me.
My sister’s wedding announcements were the best EVER. We all got invitations post-marked Hawaii to a party HERE and they were each laced with sand. Sand from the beach in Hawaii where she had snuck off to and gotten married. My mother said, Thank God! We had a party when she got back from her honeymoon. No stress, no fuss, a great time.
But years after I got married, husband’s little brother, my brother-in-law is getting married at the Citadel. Good for him. Sounds like fun, a full-military-type wedding, uniforms and swords, and a fairy-tale horse and carriage. We are now both broke college students again, I’m working on a masters part-time and working full-time, he’s finishing up his bachelor’s on the GI Bill. One day as the happy date is fast approaching, my MIL mentions, casually, like it was no big deal, that she needed the 130 bucks for my bridesmaid’s dress by the weekend.
I said, What?
Turns out, we were both in the wedding. Unbeknownst to either one of us. I was supposed to not only stand up with my brother-in-law’s fiance at their wedding, a woman I had never met, but also I was supposed to cough up 130 bucks for the one-of bridesmaid’s dresses I had never seen or heard about until that moment. For a wedding that had been a YEAR in the planning. That I would have to travel across two states and stay in an expensive hotel as well. None of which had been mentioned to me, much less discussed with me until that moment in time.
I did what I always had to do with my MIL, I took a deep breath, I drew a firm line and I stood behind it, hell or high water, evil witch that I am. What dastardly thing did I do to ruin her picture-postcard dream wedding of her beloved baby boy?
I said no.
My brother-in-law and his future bride came over to our apartment. My MIL sicked them on me, the shrew. I explained I loved my BIL very much, I was honored, but not only did I not feel comfortable standing up for someone I’d never even met before that moment, but we really couldn’t afford it. Any of it. (We were eating an awful lot of simple spaghetti and sauce in those days because it was cheap and filling. The dress alone would have set us back to starvation.) I deeply resented my MIL for 1) committing me to something without even asking me, and 2) putting me on the spot for having to explain that I was fiscally responsible enough to know we couldn’t afford it. Thankfully my husband backed me 100%.
My FIL got involved. He said he’d pay for everything, the dress, the trip, the hotel, everything. (Not my MIL, my FIL.) I said thank-you, it’s appreciated and the only way we could possibly attend, but I won’t be in the wedding party. I’ll attend, I’ll wish them the best. But she should pick someone she has actually KNOWN for more than the 10 minutes in my living room while I explained I wouldn’t be in her wedding party, to stand up with her on her most special day.
It was a big frickin’ deal for the next several years. MIL mentioned it A LOT. I ignored it and carried on.
The SECOND most outrageous invitation arrived via snail mail a few years ago at a low point for me during a medical scare (but I’m healthy now). It was from a (at best) casual Internet friend who asked me to drop everything, fly out to Denver and be her maid-of-honor. On the Saturday coming up. I had to email her (we weren’t close enough to have each other’s phone numbers.)
And say, Sweetie, you know I’d love to see Denver, and you, of course, and I’m honored you’d think of me to stand up for you at your wedding, but since I have surgery scheduled for the Thursday before your wedding to find out if I have cancer — or not — and might possibly be dying of said cancer — or not — and will be bed-ridden for a couple of possibly weeks after AND we have been talking about this for a couple of weeks now, I don’t think I’ll be able to make your lovely, spur-of-the-moment wedding.
Her answer, “But what will I do?”
Then…
“Can you reschedule your surgery?”
Alexandra 2 years ago
OP's wedding is indeed a perfect wedding. All this planning stress, rows about dresses, venues, participants, flowers and what-not is so strange to me. You're getting married to, I assume, the love of your life and you're running yourself and others ragged for....what? Those few hours you can pretend to be queen-for-a-day?
Barbara Kelly 2 years ago
I wish that I could say "Unbelievable!" , but I have lived long enough to know that there ARE people like the ones described. Good for you, for having standards, boundaries, and saying NO when you need to say it. .
Laura Binns 2 years ago
It's very interesting. You sound like someone who is great at setting boundaries in a gentle but firm way. But you also seem to know a lot of people who expect you to do totally unreasonable things. You'd think they'd learn.
Robert Beveridge 2 years ago
Potlucks are the best kinds of weddings. Or the best kinds of any gatherings, really.
Linda Riebel 2 years ago
I hope that nobody outside the U.S. is reading these stories. They would think we're all a bunch of hateful ignorant mongrels. Oops, apologies to mongrels. We're not all like that! (well, except the R. party)
Ben 2 years ago
BP should put a word limit on these posts. Please people this is not the place to publish chapter one of your novel
GK 2 years ago
These are all taken from other sites that BP just copy and pastes from.
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#24
Wedding invitation requesting for all women to dress in simple black dresses, so that the bride, maids of honor, mothers of the bride and groom and the godmother will stand out from the majority of women at the wedding. It sounded like a bunch of women that nobody cared about were invited only to look as ugly as possible and make “the important women” look good. I went and got criticized for my black dress being too short and having ribbons, so basically for my dress not being ugly enough.
Greenmantle 2 years ago
So stupid... and so much staging. You're the bride, the day is about your marriage. Stop controlling everyone else
Far Cough Khan 2 years ago
i would go as wednesday addam on her 18th birthday date, with black fishnet to go.
PickleDragon she/her 2 years ago
It's one thing to have a cute theme but this is a different level of insecure. Usually, close friends and family are invited to weddings so unless someone came in a big white dress or a giant ballgown in neon orange no one would pay attention to the other guests to that extent.
Bouche and Audi and Shyla, Oh My! 2 years ago
How DARE OP not make herself as ugly as possible on my day!
Amanita Virosa 2 years ago
I was going to say there are simple black dresses and then there are simple black dresses.
Nice Beast Ludo 2 years ago
Ugly is going to detract more attention from the bride than beauty will
Our selection of entitled invitation requests is proof that there are some things you should never include in an invitation. Glover insists that including the name of a gift registry isn’t a proper thing to do. What’s more, asking for money in an invitation is also remarkably rude and can certainly be off-putting. Undoubtedly, some of the people from our list should be taking notes.
#25
The requests (many of them) were not necessarily on the invitation itself, but my experience should qualify nonetheless. One of my (ex) friends decided to get married in a tiny village in Italy. She lives in a major US city and I in another. We had become pretty good friends after going to school together a few years before. She blindsided me a bit when she asked me to be her Maid of Honor (MOH), since she had several childhood friends that she spoke about frequently. But she also had a difficult personality, so I figured that might have something to do with it. At first, I accepted, but let her know that I would have to fly in the day before the wedding and then fly back the day after. I also let her know that due to my insane schedule that I would not be able to put long hours into planning either, but that I wanted to be there for her. I am a healthcare provider and run a small clinic, which leaves me very little time off, as I do not receive PTO. If I leave for any length of time, I have to either shut down my clinic or hire a locum tenens (neither are great options). At first she agreed, but then began texting and e-mailing all day every day regarding flights that had me there for the entire week. She then demanded that I take the entire week off as she had planned several outings, lunches and other events spanning the week before her wedding. As the MOH I would have to be there! She also began hinting that she wanted her Bachelorette Party in Vegas and wedding showers in both her hometown and the city she lived. I told her that I now had some reservations about being the MOH and told her that it might be better to have someone else do it, as I had little time to help with planning and couldn’t take off that much time to fly all over creation. She works for a major airline, so all of her flights are almost free. I calculated all of the expenses, which included me taking a week off of work and flying to these locations. I would have been on the hook for over $10,000 and that’s without a plus one at the wedding (my SO bowed out gracefully after learning the cost of the tickets). After a few weeks of constant phone calls, texts and e-mail (during the day when I’m with patients) that she demand I answer immediately, I finally grew some balls and told her that I was no longer able to be her MOH. This was 10 months before the wedding, so plenty of time to find a new one. She was, of course, very upset. At that time I was (stupidly) still not ready to end the friendship, as I realized that weddings can sometimes bring out the worst in people. I told her I was still planning on coming to the wedding, but would fly in the day before and leave the day after as previously discussed. To that she responded with “why bother” and “please return the gift I gave you when I asked you to be my MOH”. It actually cost more to ship this “gift” back to her than the actual cost of the item ($6). We have not spoken since. Thank God!
Nice Beast Ludo 2 years ago
She demanded a $6 gift back??? I would be humiliated to give a gift that cheap ever!@
Nikki Sevven 2 years ago
Her: "Please return the gift I gave you for being MOH." Me: "The $6 gift? I'll see if the charity shop still has it."
#26
About 3 years ago, I received an invite for my son to attend his absent fathers wedding. Along with the demand for $60 for his meal at the wedding, over $200 for outfit they were going to purchase for son to be in wedding plus I was expected to take my son interstate for the wedding (over 1500kms away) and a link to the gift registry. I declined. Well my ex was discovered to be cheating while on honeymoon. Hes still paying off his $30k wedding. Then just before christmas I receive another wedding invite, again for absent father. Our son didnt even know he was engaged. Again with demands for money for plate, wedding invite and registry. This time I’ve actually been invited along with my other child. I’ve been informed that he is still cheating with same woman on new fiance so I dont see this wedding lasting any longer then his last one.
Nice Beast Ludo 2 years ago
Why didn't he just marry the woman he has been cheating on everyone else to be with?
Rosecrucian Roeth 2 years ago
Each time I read one of these, I keep thinking.....can it be any worse? And the answer is YES, IT CAN!
#27
My first cousin's daughter was getting married. It was explained that as the church was small, they had to limit the congregation, but I was welcome to wait outside. I was 60 years old. I declined the invitation. There is a tendency nowadays to fill a wedding church with friends and acquaintances rather than family . I was hurt to be treated like this by my cousin whom I grew up with. Our mothers were sisters.
Alexandra 2 years ago
I'm sorry, they should not have done that. I'm getting the impression a wedding is becoming more of a party that you invite your friends for than an event that connects two families.
Panda 2 years ago
That is true but it is not necessarily a bad thing. What I don't understand is why they invite all those people if they do not want them there.
Load More Replies... James Frail 2 years ago
Nah, gonna go hot take that you never should have been invited in the first place. This was an obligation invite on the part of your cousin. There is no mention of any ridiculous gift demand, so it's not a greed situation. Nor even a mention of a relationship with the bride herself. Ergo, you have none to speak of. Otherwise you wouldn't have had to lean so heavily on describing what a cousin is. Literally every friend in that church deserves to be there more than a first cousin once removed.
Blue Chambers 2 years ago
A wedding is a celebration. People want to celebrate with their friends. Not their mother's cousin that they barely know.
Barbara Kelly 2 years ago
"welcome to wait outside?" Why not an invitation to the reception? This is beyond disrespectful.
Another thing to consider is what to do when you’re on the receiving end of a crass invitation. It’s important to maintain a positive attitude when responding to any kind of invitation, even if it is distasteful. If you have the unfortunate fate of receiving such an invite, take the high road and decline politely. On the other hand, if you decide to attend, forget about the host’s faux pas and just enjoy yourself.
#28
“This is my wedding going on, shut up everyone! Be serious!” I had a distant aunt who was known for her eccentricities. Hindu weddings can have up to 4–5 hours of constant rituals on stage as the guests watch on or talk amongst themselves. This was one of those routine weddings where children and parents meandered around the wedding hall meeting relatives while the couple performed ancient rituals in front of a fire. It is not meant to be a movie that everyone watches. There is nothing entertaining about it except the beginning and ending where the guests participate by showering rice on the couple. Anyway, in the middle of the 3rd hour on a very hot Bombay afternoon, we heard the chanting stop and all the murmurs in the hall died down as the bride suddenly stood up and made her way to the microphone. “This is my wedding going on, shut up everyone! Be serious!” I can completely understand that the guests need to respect the occasion, however, the crowd wasn’t even all that loud. In fact, most of the kids were playing in the garden, the adults were eating, and the only people even having soft conversations were the seniors. It was very awkward and her parents got extremely embarrassed. Her husband didn’t react but….now….15 years later…they are divorced and he got the kids.
and_a_touch_of_the_’tism 2 years ago
Did she not understand the wedding tradition? I mean at least say something beforehand if you plan on being a control freak.
Gabriele Alfredo Pini 2 years ago
From what I understand of the story it is the expected situation... In a Catholic Wedding it is expected that all guests partecipate or stay silent, but it is very interactive and brief (less than one hour)
Load More Replies... #29
I received an invitation quite a while ago from a former co-worker, with whom I was not very close. When I receive invitations from people I am not close to, or don’t know well, I usually just send a gift (and more than likely it will be a gift card). I didn’t actually read the invitation until I’d had it a few days, and I had to read it a few times to actually follow along. They were having their wedding at one spot, outdoors, at 8AM. Then a short “wedding coffee” would follow. Then a reception would be held six hours later at a country club that was at least 20 miles away from the wedding spot. At this point I was happy to not be attending, but the request for gifts (and this was printed on the invitation) had me laughing. They requested that all guests refrain from bringing wrapped presents and limit their gifts to money cards and cash. I disobeyed, sent a gift card from a local store, and heard nothing more. Not even a thank you.
Blue Bunny of Happiness 2 years ago
Well, at least you could do something during the day, rather than stand around bored, hungry and thirsty whilst they pose for a million ‘arty’ photos. The gift bit though, rude.
Huddo's sister 2 years ago
I went to a wedding where there was like 1.5hrs between ceremony and reception. They were at different places, so you weren't supposed to hand around, but it was not enough time to go home and chill before heading out again, so we had to find somewhere nearby to hang before going to the reception. If there was more time it would have been better.
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#30
NO CHILDREN. NO SMARTPHONES. NO MAIDS.
Yes, you read that right. This is a common request/demand seen on most local Qatari wedding cards. Qatari weddings are held simultaneously in two venues - one for the men and one for the women. This is on the women’s side invite that these requests are typically seen.
PandaKoPanda 2 years ago
Look, as horrible as it sounds to us, this is normal in the Middle East. Children aren't always invited to any wedding anyway, a lot of children in the middle east are raised by maids (although we do call them nannies and not maids) so if there are no children, there are no nannies - what's the issue here?
KieLeaHar 2 years ago
I completely agree with that. I watch me documentaries, including a few on YouTube, where they have asked the nanny and then the mother questions about the children to see who knows more about the children. And every time, the nanny knew all of the answers and I think one of the mother’s got one question right. It’s quite sad really.
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Sapna Sarfare 2 years ago
Muslim wedding in Arab countries... typically i assume the bride and groom have different parties as the sexes do not mix,
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Emma 2 years ago
The "no smartphones" request seems reasonable as most of the women will be in hijab and, during the receptions, they'll be able to take them off as the men will be in a different room. No smartphones means no one can take pictures of them without their hijab. That's how it worked at the wedding I went to in Jordan, anyway so I assume it's for similar reasons.
Zedrapazia 2 years ago
I understand children and that you please don't daddle on the venue, but *maids*...? What does this mean??
When declining an invitation, don’t make false stories about why you’re not able to attend. It’s not necessary to go into the details of why you can’t make it, a simple “Unfortunately, I will not be able to attend” should suffice. Don’t forget to thank the host for inviting you. Even if you’re not that thankful – it’s the polite thing to do.
#31
My first wedding was ginormous as my parents invited a gazillion people. I had asked them for two things: 1. That I should personally know the guests, and 2. That the guests don’t get wasted and fight. Both requests were apparently unreasonable and declined by my parents.
KieLeaHar 2 years ago
They might not have known how many people the parents were inviting. maybe? Maybe the mother or father said they be in charge of all the invitations? As for getting drunk, that’s a common thing at a lot of weddings.
Load More Replies... Barbara Kelly 2 years ago
The first request is reasonable. Often parents want to invite THEIR friends, and offer to pay the reception meal costs for those people. This makes a sticky control issue. Unfortunately, it is hard to judge who will "get wasted and fight' at weddings and other events involving emotions. . Sometimes, the meekest people will surprise you! I have memories of helping find a bright, shy young man who was high school valedictorian who became dangerously drunk at the graduation dinner and wandered off. Being a teacher chaperone has its challenges.
#32
The wedding where we were asked to bring a Beringer Wine specifically a white and a red, to be dropped off at a cart specifically set up by the kitchen of the event hall AND a bottle of Crown Royal AND Johnny Walker Red. We found other guests had been asked to contribute the same wines but other liquors as well. One of our mutual friends was asked to bring 2-gifts of Captain Morgan's Spiced Rum, another Bicardi WhiteRum. We did notice when we got there, they were serving hors d’œvres in a smaller room off the sanctuary where the wedding was to take place, that two of the wait staff were boxing up every other bottle of red then white wines. Leaving one wine to be served. Plus they were boxing up at least one bottle of the 80 proof and higher alcoholic bottles of liquor. Being a bit mercenary myself, I wanted to get to the bottom of the hand written inserts in the invitations. I asked the bride’s half sister about “the wine and liquor highjinx going on in the kitchen". She was already 2 sheets in the wind and very p.o'ed about being left out of the festivities since she and her husband introduced the bride to the groom and without them the wedding wouldn't have happened. They had been relegated to guest status. This was also a very bone of contention since the groom worked with her husband and wouldn't have had a job if not for them! It seems everyone's financial status had been a factor in deciding WHICH liquor was asked of them, or not asked, as the occasion proved the bride to be petty and grasping at the expense of her “guests”. She “requested" their liquor contributions to help with the dinner she had selected instead of budgeting it in to her dinner. The liquor was for the after party. However, she was ALSO pulling every other bottle to stock their wine and liquor cabinet and bar for their future entertaining. When I told my husband, he mentioned it to some of the other guest who brought the liquor but had been mentally doing head counts and figuring the amounts of liquor brought to the festivities. This led to a discrete removal of the liquors brought by her guests being repossessed by telling the kitchen staff they would be leaving after the bride and groom’s dance. Some just went in and liberated their contributions. (Chalk one up for the guests’ side). WE brought ONE wine, and no liquor. We had already shelled out close to $85 for a gift on their/the bride’s registry. We bought them a shower curtain, liner, towel set, w/matching tank/commode/lid covers & three piece bathmat set and shower anti slip bath tub mats. Their registry WAS ridiculously expensive and grasping. They asked for a Paul Revere Silver Service coffee/tea/sugar/creamer, silver cube tongs w/8 Sterling Silver spoons, 8 sterling saucers/cups and the Silver serving tray. TRY pricing that. Her mom said “we are paying for the wedding. We worked to get our stuff. She expects people to give her these things just because she's getting married! We didn't rear her this way. We are ashamed. I am sorry, dear.” She walked off, with a deep sigh, crying and wiping her nose.
Easily Excitable Panda 2 years ago
Man, if I were going to demand wine and liquor, I’d at least go for the good stuff: Dom Perignon, VAT 69, an actually nice rum. If you’re going to be grasping, at least grasp for the best!
Jacqueline Hayes 2 years ago
When you do an obvious grab for gifts, you're not classy enough for the good stuff.
Load More Replies... #33
A good friend was dating a woman for some years, they moved in together, and got engaged. I was invited to the wedding. I regretfully declined.
The wedding was a 3 day event in the middle of nowhere Napa valley basically camping out. No amenities beyond a few communal cabins with cots. No showers. Very basic toilette facilities. Cooking on portable butane stoves…with food you brought yourself.
No thanks buddy.
Nicola Roberts 2 years ago
For some it would be a perfect event, just not mine. Sounds as if they had the cost for them and their guest very much under control.
#34
I have not seen anything unreasonable on an invitation, but some of my family opted not to attend because they thought I was being a diva requesting that no one wear perfume or cologne. Why did I request this? I did it because I have an occupational lung disease that reacts very poorly to many things including fragrances, most of which are man-made, from volatile organic compounds (VOCs) that are byproducts of petroleum refining. My lungs see them as a deathly threat and try to close up and force all my air out. When exposed to them, all I can is cough uncontrollably, and can even pass out. I did not want to cough my way down the aisle, or pass out in the aisle or spend my wedding night in the ER. We added this note on the back of the invitation, saying why it was necessary and driving home the point by telling them that if anyone did show up wearing any, they would have to sit in the balcony as I could not walk past them down the aisle. Was that so unreasonable? I certainly don’t think so. Since then, some of those family members have since asked to learn about my disease and why it was so important that they not wear any fragrances. And have apologized for jumping to the wrong conclusion.
Mrs. Ginger McSarcasm 2 years ago
It's the same as not serving seafood at a reception due to an allergy
Stephanie Did It 2 years ago
Breathing comfortably is not diva behavior! I have several family members who refuse to learn about my asthma and autoimmune disorders, but they're full of advice that would cure me "if only I would (fill in the blank)."
arthbach 2 years ago
I'm trying to work out why this one is on the list. It's a totally reasonable request.
Jan Rosier 2 years ago
Probably because of some of the reaction the bride received...
Load More Replies... Nicola Roberts 2 years ago
Why not explain it's for health reason on the invite? And tell people you know it's an unusual request. Many of these posts are about the lack of empathy - which works both ways. Just out of interest aren't deodorants synthetic?
Blue Bunny of Happiness 2 years ago
They did explain why on the back of the invite. The fragrance in deodorants is less powerful than in a perfume and most areas where deodorants are applied are covered by clothes, further reducing the impact. Unfortunately, some people drown themselves in perfume/aftershave and reapply it throughout the day. My Dad could only wear old spice aftershave as every other one made me wheeze. I still can’t walk through a make up/perfume department without wheezing/sneezing. It’s a very attractive look!
Load More Replies... #35
One of my dad's cousins was getting married for the fourth time, and it raised a few eyebrows when he invited many members of the extended family to join his wedding “in spirit.” The collective reaction was, “So we're supposed to think about him but not show up? Okay, whatever.” It wasn't that unreasonable, really, for him to want to keep wedding number four small and low key, and I don't think too many people were troubled not to have to attend, but we all thought it was a little odd, how he went about it. He always was kind of the black sheep in other respects, too.
Easily Excitable Panda 2 years ago
That’s actually pretty wholesome, especially compared to a lot of the other ones.
Nicola Roberts 2 years ago
I agree. Fourth wedding he wanted to dial back the fuss but at the same time he didn't want to hide the fact he was getting married. I think for many of these they just needed a PR company to make the delivery of the request more palatable. Obviously I'm joking about marketing they just didn't think it through.
Load More Replies... Barbara Kelly 2 years ago
It seems that he wanted to announce his wedding but not burden people with "the usual", considering that it was Wedding #4.
#36
Think planes, trains, and automobiles. And boats. The couple lived in a major American city but decided to have their wedding on a hard-to-get-to Caribbean island. The guests had to fly 4+ hours to one Caribbean island, then take a bus, then a boat to the destination island because that island was too small to have an airstrip. We left our house around 6am and didn’t arrive at the final destination until about 12 hours later. We had to pay for our own cabs to the hotel — I mean, every single person was coming from the US and onto the same boat dock on the island, so why didn’t they at least have a shuttle to take us to the hotel? (Same when we went home a couple of days later — we had to pay for all transportation.) Of course, we had to pay for our hotel rooms. And most meals. This was peak travel season, by the way, so prices were very jacked up. It was sad that so many family members couldn’t make the wedding. It was right before Christmas, so (1) kids were in school, and parents didn’t want to pull them out for a destination wedding, (2) families couldn’t afford to spend so much right before a holiday, (3) the old people who did attend were highly uncomfortable with all the traveling — seasickness was just one issue, (4) it was like a mandatory vacation for the guests. I would never have chosen to vacation at that spot because it was highly inconvenient and extremely expensive. I’ve had the misfortune to be invited to other destination weddings, but this one took the cake. It was as though they chose the most expensive and least accessible option they could think of. Very unreasonable to ask your guests to travel so far and spend so much, just so the couple could be “different.” Thus far, the difference between this and every other wedding I’ve attended is that I still get mad when I think about this one.
Barbara Kelly 2 years ago
Having policies and boundaries saves a lot of trouble.
Load More Replies... #37
Well, where to start, lol! Sorry but this will be super long. My husband’s youngest brother got engaged to a woman after only dating for about 4 months. They set their wedding date for a little over a year later. Cool, gives them plenty of time to save and also to really get to know each other too, in my opinion. Fast forward 6 months, we are asked if our 2 youngest children could be in the wedding, 4 & 8. Ok, no problem, they are the niece and nephew of the groom after all. So they pick a weekend a few weeks later to go look at flower girl dresses and also to take us to get my son fitted for a tux. Now, I’m cool with paying for their outfits for the wedding but when we get to the tux rental place, we find out that the tux they picked out was going to cost $189.00 plus tax. I asked, “this is for the groomsmen and groom right? Not the ring bearer?” They said, “oh yes, it’s for everyone in the wedding party.” I flat out told my BIL and his fiancé there was no way I was paying that much for a kids tux and that I would go buy a nice pair of pants, a nice shirt and then just rent the shoes (because they wanted a very specific style) and the vest and tie to match the guys, ($60.00 plus tax) because he did not need to wear a full on tux. Fast forward again to about 2 months before the wedding and they ask my husband and myself to be in the wedding party…..WHAT? So come to find out that one of my BIL’s friend backed out and his wife was going to be in the wedding too. Again, we thought about the cost of the tux rental, $189.00 plus tax. We couldn’t afford the tux for our son, why did they think we could afford one for my husband and now on top of that they wanted me in the wedding too. So add the cost of a new dress for me. We declined their request and when we did, we were told that we now messed up the number of tuxes rented in order to get my BIL a free tux! Really?!?!? Ask us to be in the wedding so he doesn’t have to pay the $189.00 tux rental fee! Why? Because they couldn’t afford it!!!! We asked them, then why did you even pick something like that in the first place? They didn’t have an answer…… Now another month after that, we are right at the point of them sending out their invitations. I get a call from my future sister-in-law asking what kind of food they should serve at the reception, because the original plan on having a Mexican food buffet fell through because of not being able to afford it because they were not going to get help from her father like they thought. So I told her that we could still make it nice and that I would help her cook all the sides and then they would only have to purchase the meat from a caterer or restaurant. We have a grocery club membership and I said I would take her with me so she could by all the food she wanted for the sides, in bulk and for cheaper too. She thanked me and said that would be great and appreciated my help. A week later, an aunt of ours got their invitation in the mail and called and asked me if I had gotten mine and I had not. I asked her why and she said because she was assigned to bring a casserole to the reception. Oh and the recipe so that they can add it to their recipes for their house after they were married. And it was also BYOB, alcohol or whatever you wanted to drink, ie, sodas too. Needless to say I was appalled! I thought we had worked everything out for the food for the reception, guess not! Lol! So their reception ended up being a pot luck reception and they assigned different dishes to their guests. My husband and I didn’t even get an invitation in the mail. My BIL was suppose to come and hand deliver it to us, so they could save money on stamps. Only the people out of town got a mailed invitation. Seriously, I kid you not! That’s what they said. They finally brought us our invitation, 2 days before the wedding and I was assigned a casserole as well! It was the craziest thing I’ve ever seen in my life for a wedding reception. Oh and the bridal shower was
Stephanie Did It 2 years ago (edited)
Why NOT have a potluck reception? The food will be everyone's best effort, recipes shared with the bride, and a family vibe all around. This isn't terribly unusual in the American south/southwest or some other areas. As for invitations, lots of young brides make planning mistakes or get overwhelmed with well-meant (but bad) advice.
Ravioli 1 month ago (edited)
The best way when one is broke is what my friend did, wore a regular dress, the ceremony was free at city hall and only for close family, no flowers, no photographer, the reception was a couple dozens at a regular restaurant and she didn't tell them it was a wedding. It was a very nice celebration.
Load More Replies... Zoe Vokes 2 years ago
“Oh and the bridal shower was just as bad. They had it in the back half of a hamburger joint and once everyone was there, they said that we could all go order food if we wanted to eat, at our own expense, and then we could all just eat our food while they opened gifts and played games. They did have a cake for everyone but that is all they provided. Lastly, they were married October 2017 and ended up splitting up in May of 2018 and finally divorced in August of 2018. Didn’t even make it a year. Anyone guess why it didn’t work out???? Money!!!! They didn’t have any and they blamed the other for their moneyless situation! Lol!!!“
Snorkeldorf 2 years ago
Years ago a friend got married to a woman he met thru a dating service. They were both in their early 30's. He was never-before-married, she was divorced with a young son. He was an only child and lived with his mom, rent free, as he helped with the household. When they became engaged, she and her young son also moved in, also rent free. They both had good, full-time jobs. When we arrived at the reception, no one seemed to be enjoying themselves. Her uncle was a member of the VFW and had rented the hall for them as a gift. There was a boombox, no food of any sort, and a cash bar. None of this was mentioned in the invites. We stuck around for a couple of drinks then left, as did most people. Heard they had the traditional bridal dance, throwing of the bouquet and garter, along with cutting of the cake. Was told it was a tiny cake and no one got any of that either. At least give people a heads up so they can eat ahead of time and bring some cash if they want to drink.
Amy T 2 years ago
People don't realize how expensive a wedding is until they start adding everything up.
Zoe Vokes 2 years ago
But choosing a $189 tux rental is going for an expensive option. Strange that they weren’t looking for something cheaper.
Load More Replies... #38
Had to be that time I was roped into a Bachelorette party where the bride (who was in the group chat with about 30 of her other ‘friends’) clearly stated she desired: To go bar hopping, In a pimped our bus, fully stocked with alcohol, Then to go back to a hotel room with ‘all the girls’ Have dinner and more drinks, with dessert of phallic-themed cake, Enjoying a performance by a male stripper, Thence to open all her gifts. She also wanted to do it all the Saturday before her wedding, fair enough; however it just so happened to be my birthday. I quietly observed all the messages coming in. Lots of excitement over decor, bar options, games etc. None of those options were what I’d call fun. A few days after came the costing from the maid of honour. No big deal, each guest would contribute the equivalent of US$150, plus a personalized t-shirt, in addition to bringing the bride a gift (lingerie, size small, purple is he favourite colour) and either a bottle of booze, or an appetizer. I exited the group chat right after. I didn’t know the bride very well, we were acquaintances at best. I wasn’t even invited to her wedding, and she hadn’t reached out to confirm if I wanted to be a part of her bachelorette. It was quite clear to me I was invited to make up numbers to lesson the cost of this extravagant event per person. The wedding itself had fewer that 100 invited guests, so I’m sure many others in the group were similarly roped in. I politely declined to her via DM using my birthday clash as the excuse. She never replied and we haven’t spoken since.
#39
It was not the child free request that was unreasonable (per se, though it had unreasonable aspects), but rather the way the request was communicated. I will admit some fault here, I had completely forgotten about the need to scour the envelope to know for sure who exactly is invited; in my area/family/financial strata a child free wedding is all but unheard of, so it had never been something I needed to know/check before, after this whole exchange I vaguely remembered reading it somewhere when planning my own wedding, and I vaguely remembered adding all children's names when I addressed my own invitations, but the the information had fallen out of my brain between time and mommy/pregnancy brain. It all could have been a very simple misunderstanding very cordially remedied, but instead… So it all starts with sending an RSVP card marked yes for 3 (myself, my husband, and our just under 2 year old girl), for my husband's cousin's wedding. We'd heard from the groom's parents that the bride's family was quite wealthy compared to anyone in our family (most the parental generation being solidly middle class shading towards upper middle, with the young adult millennial 'kids' being mostly significantly poorer), and a bit snobby about it, and it was obvious from the invitation that this would likely be a pretty Tony event, so before sending it I did scour the invitation for anything that said no kids, but as I said, I forgot the clue was on the envelope and sent it in for 3. About a week later I got a phonecall from my husband's aunt, the mother of the bride was in a tizzy about all of the families from our side who had RSVPed with children and had demanded aunt call and set us straight, still relatively reasonable (although it was easy to read between the lines that this had not been a pleasant conversation for Aunt), so I told aunt I wasn't sure if we'd be able to make it in that case, I'd have to call around about childcare and get back to her probably the next day. This is where things take a turn for the crazy, within probably 2 hours I got another phonecall, this time from the mother of the bride (who I had never met), absolutely livid that we were all so uncouth as to RSVP wrong and then not immediately be able to answer yes when we found out we needed to round up childcare. It's been too many years now for me to remember the exact details of the conversation, but the part I can never forget was after I explained that I hadn't heard back from my parents, which was pretty much my only childcare option since everyone else we ever left daughter with would be at the wedding, her annoyed suggestion (said in a tone that suggested I was frightfully stupid for not having thought of this myself), “Just leave her with your nanny of course!” I sat there, flabbergasted, for a minute, I literally don't know a single person with a nanny, it is not common in our part of the mostly rural Midwest even if you do have money, I finally sputtered out “We don't have a nanny.” “Oh, you're one of those households that revolves around the children are you” (I cannot properly convey the disgust in which this was said) “I'm a stay at home mom?” “Ugg, you'll regret that when they think they need you for everything all the time.” I am absolutely gobsmacked by now, just don't even know what to say to this, I think I just got something out to the effect of “if you need to know right now then we'll have to say no, or I can wait and see what my parents say and get back to Aunt by tomorrow” before hanging up on her still huffing. Well apparently I was in the middle of her list of calls, she had also treated many of my husband's other cousins to this, including the groom's sisters, one of whom was a single mom, and the no kids was extended to the groom's neice and nephews as well, despite some of these kids being actually in the wedding (apparently the clearly universally employed nannies were supposed to take these kids when the ceremony was over). Even
Zoe Vokes 2 years ago
“ Eventually the groom's parents got so sick of the whole mess they just said they would pay for all the extra kid's meals themselves (I think it was 5 total), so I got another phonecall from Aunt saying nevermind, mother of the bride is still breathing fire about this, but we want all the kids there, we're paying for them, just bring her anyway. Whatever. Probably would have been more correct to still leave her with my parents, but while I was embarrassed to have made the faux pas at first, and perfectly willing to either find childcare or sit that one out once I found out about it, after that lovely conversation I was feeling pretty strongly that pissing her off more sounded like fun. And I was more concerned with making my actual family happy than some stuck up stranger. It wound up being a fun night for our side of the family, mother of the bride kept scowling at the whole group all night, it was definitely trying very hard to be a stuffy rich people event but the groom's side“
Zoe Vokes 2 years ago
“ruined it by laughing too loud and having too much fun on the dance floor (I don't even mean being drunk and uncouth, I mean literally his side was laughing and chatting and dancing and her side was just sitting there looking like they were sucking lemons). The marriage wound up lasting less than 2 years. Same cousin's second wife is an absolute delight.“
Load More Replies... Stephanie Did It 2 years ago
A "tony" event is just another way of saying "high toned," not related to Tony awards.
Caroline Nagel 2 years ago (edited)
In case people want to read the rest of the story just click on the name on the left side under the post. The children were all allowed to come and the groom's family had a blast while the bride's family were being a bunch of sour grapes.
Zoe Vokes 2 years ago
And the marriage ended up lasting less than two years. His new wife is lovely.
Load More Replies... What do you think ?
Racing Tadpole 2 years ago
The amount of money wasted is insane...I bought a standard cream dress, my husband had his good suit dry-cleaned, we organised a 'family reunion' at a riverside restaurant , three courses for $50 each, no presents please , just pay for your meals, we bought a case of champagne to drink, no flowers. Or music, no stress....
ToGo 2 years ago
Keep seeing a lot of "but money was tight", "I was broke at the time" etc. Even if I was a millionaire I wouldn't be complying with these requests. That money could be going to worthwhile causes, not these greedy tacky arrogant eejits.
Nitka Tsar 2 years ago
Even worse: people wanting expensive weddings while they themselves are broke
Load More Replies...
Will Cable 2 years ago
After reading these I'm happy my partner and I had just 2 witnesses to a very simple and cheap/basic event, no special clothes or anything, especially no gifts.
Doozle bug 2 years ago
I’ve never understood all this wedding nonsense. My cousin got married in the mountains, sung the ceremony (very badly, awkward and embarrassing. Had a $100 a head breakfast then a $300 a head dinner with 250 guests. No one lived in the mountains.
Nicola Roberts 2 years ago
Have understood this right? $75000 on dinner? Or did I miss a wink?
Load More Replies... Racing Tadpole 2 years ago
The amount of money wasted is insane...I bought a standard cream dress, my husband had his good suit dry-cleaned, we organised a 'family reunion' at a riverside restaurant , three courses for $50 each, no presents please , just pay for your meals, we bought a case of champagne to drink, no flowers. Or music, no stress....
ToGo 2 years ago
Keep seeing a lot of "but money was tight", "I was broke at the time" etc. Even if I was a millionaire I wouldn't be complying with these requests. That money could be going to worthwhile causes, not these greedy tacky arrogant eejits.
Nitka Tsar 2 years ago
Even worse: people wanting expensive weddings while they themselves are broke
Load More Replies... Will Cable 2 years ago
After reading these I'm happy my partner and I had just 2 witnesses to a very simple and cheap/basic event, no special clothes or anything, especially no gifts.
Doozle bug 2 years ago
I’ve never understood all this wedding nonsense. My cousin got married in the mountains, sung the ceremony (very badly, awkward and embarrassing. Had a $100 a head breakfast then a $300 a head dinner with 250 guests. No one lived in the mountains.
Nicola Roberts 2 years ago
Have understood this right? $75000 on dinner? Or did I miss a wink?
Load More Replies... You May Like Woman Refuses To Attend The Wedding After Bride’s Unhinged Decision, Is Expected To Fulfill Bridesmaid Duties Groom’s Vows Make Bride Walk Away In Front Of Everyone: “How Humiliating”
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