Parents Blame Teen For Not Watching Her Autistic Brother Even Though She Said She Wouldn’t
Adolescence is tiring. And Reddit user Technical-Alps6831 believes her days would be a whole lot easier if it wasn’t for her parents.
The 19-year-old, who is still living with them, feels like her younger brother is already capable of taking care of himself, which includes bearing the responsibility for his actions. However, when he snuck into her room and inadvertently got high off her edibles, their mom and dad blamed her.
So she told the story to the subreddit ‘Am I the [Jerk]?‘ to get a better understanding of the situation.
This teenager thought she had her edibles well hidden, but her younger brother still found them
Image credits: Zinkevych_D / envanto (not the actual photo)
So their parents took strong measures to make sure it doesn’t happen again
Image credits: Anna Shvets / pexels (not the actual photo)
Image source: Technical-Alps6831
Families need to support each other to work out their everyday life
Image credits: Askar Abayev / pexels (not the actual photo)
Family life can be difficult as it is, but when you add autism into the mix, even ordinary conflicts might become a very big deal.
Therefore, it’s important for the children to feel they’re all cared for and are all making a contribution to the household. This also encourages everyone to pull together as a family and teaches all children valuable skills and independence.
Experts recommend that parents set consistent rules, use strategies to encourage positive behavior in all their children, and try to be fair in handling aggressive or hurtful behavior from all their children as well as work out tasks and chores that suit their children’s different ages, stages of development, strengths and abilities.
The author of the post said that her parents didn’t seem to be “too against” her cannabis use, so it’s hard to imagine the boundaries that they had settled on before the whole ordeal.
However, her argument that she’s “an adult” doesn’t really stand. As of January 2024, 24 states plus the District of Columbia and three U.S. territories have put in place regulations for the recreational use of marijuana. Recreational use—wherever it has been legalized—is limited to those who are 21 and older.
Autism advocate Lisa Jo Rudy acknowledges that older siblings of autistic children may be frustrated when parents’ attention is pulled to a younger sibling. At at nineteen, however, the young woman, who already thinks of herself as an adult, should have already established her own place not only in her school but also in her family.
So if her parents think that their current arrangement isn’t working, she should at least demonstrate some maturity and work together to find a solution.
Some people who have read the story, are on the teenager’s side
But the majority blame either her or the entire family for what happened
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I think parents should not leave their autistic 10 year old to be reluctantly babysat by a 19 year old d**g user.
It’s understandable that they kicked her out - accidents happen but she doesn’t seem to accept any responsibility or show concern for her younger brother. However if they don’t let her live there any more then the 10 year old brother is going to feel guilty and upset about what happened, possibly forever.
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She is living with her d**g dealer now. That right there tells you how responsible she is. Kid is lucky he didn't get into her hard d***s.
I'm so concerned. I wish more people were aware of what homeless services were available in their area.
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Wow, I hope this is just another bored teen trolling the reddit. She lives at home and is a member of the family, helping each other out is part of the dynamic of a family. OP doesn't get to dictate the rules. She knew that her brother was under her care and basically flipped off her parents. Having d***s in the home, no matter where OP stored them, with a child in the home is STUPID and DANGEROUS. Kids snoop. And how bloody long was she in the shower that her brother was able to find the edibles, eat, get high and her parents returned home to find him in an obvious state, and she was STILL in the shower? OP sounds like an entitled AH. I am glad her parents booted her out, she is a danger to the family. And living with her dealer in a state where it is legal? Sounds fishy af.
Yes, this seemed fishy to me too. The times I've had edibles, it took 1.5 - 2 hours to start working... that's one heck of a long shower...
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If you live somewhere cannabis is legal and are of age to purchase it you don't need to stash your edibles in bags maked 'do not eat'. Legal edibles come in clearly marked packaging (usually with TCH levels in mg indicated) that a 10 year old should be able to discern is NOT normal candy. You also don't need a d**g dealer if you live somewhere weed is legal because you can buy it at a store, if you're of age. Also, being asked to watch your significantly younger sibling for a few hours on a weekend, PD day or holiday is normal.
If you want to do d***s, illegal or not, and are not a minor, get your own place or move in with people who share your views. You do you, but accept the consequences. Living together with ones family sadly comes with some responsibilities, especially for older siblings. More freedom = more responsibilities, including caring for family members. Why? 1. Running a household to offer care and shelter for a family is a team effort. Either one pays rent by money or duties. 2. It teaches you how to care for your very own family one day. However, if one is sure that a spouse and children are not their plans, then move out and live your life. 3. It is just a normal thing to do. Why would OP want to return "home" anyway?
I mean... she NTA for the situation, but sounds like a trashy person. 19 drunk and drugged out and complaining that locking up her pot is such a huge hassle.. she just sounds childish and insufferable and that last part "staying at my dealers house" sort of nail in the coffin for any sympathy for her. Its obvious where shes headed and why. If this is real its pathetic.
Not sure if this is genuine but her lack of concern for anyone but herself made my blood run cold.
I was with her until she went to her dealer's house. If pot is legal that means she's doing harder stuff, which is stupid as hell. I wouldn't want her around her little brother either!
There’s something missing from this story and I think it’s deliberate to try to get support. She claims he had ONE edible then says THEY were in a bag with ‘do not eat’ written on it. No 10 year old is going to find a bag of chocolates and only eat one. She’s trying to downplay the danger he was in. Also, how was her brother already high and crying when her parents got home if he went into her room while she was showering and she was still in the shower when they got home? That’s a pretty long shower. I’m suspecting her d**g use has addled her brain.
YTA and a junkie. You're talking about the legality of marijuana whilst suffering a hangover because you drank underage. You left edibles where your brother could easily obtain them, and they person you go running to when being kicked out of the house is one of your d**g dealers. Yeah, you have a bright future ahead s/. You need to get your s**t together. This is coming from a former junkie.
She is 19. There are no d***s that are legal for her here in the US because of her age. Her parents have tolerated her illegal d**g use of pot, but obviously once it interferes with the well-being of their special needs minor child, they're done putting up with it. My opinion is they should have put their foot down sooner... or maybe they did and that is why the shoe dropped so hard this time.
So YTA. You are lucky that all your parents did was kick you out. I did a quick google and here in Canada, you could be charged with criminal negligence, punishable by up to 10 years in jail, if you don’t lock up edibles and a child gets at them.
I honestly hope she gets help. As one of the comments said, why does she need a dealer if pot is legal in her state? Not saying her parents shouldn't respect her wishes on watching the kid.
When did BP become the immature drúg addict, poor me hour? Yikes!
I genuinely couldn't focus on her AITA part because I was so focused on how messed up her life is and she has no idea. She sounds awful.
Seems to be a lot missing from this stories, That last bit about doing harder d***s, really makes me wonder if there's truths mixed with lies, here. Addicts are great at telling poor me stories. Maybe, she gave her brother the chocolate, hoping to keep him quiet and out of her hair? Maybe, she was in the bathroom so long, because she was doing those hard d***s in there, and passed out? Maybe, little brother got scared for her, and that's why he called the parents, and was crying? Maybe, her parents put her in the shower, because she was ODing? I don't know, but they didn't kick her out over babysitting. They knew she had edibles in the house, and it's not unheard of for10 year old brothers to take things labeled "Do Not Eat",so I doubt it was over that either. Something more happened.
Watch your own damn kids unless the other person offers it.
I think that you are a dissapointment to your parents. Barely an adult, just 19, but not a particularly responsible person. More interested in your own vices than helping out your parents by simply minding their other kid for a short while. It's not as if he was a stranger or that you had to go somewhere else to do it. You don't strike me as a person to me trusted with anything important.
Esh. Your brother should know better than to steal from you. He might be autistic but a 10yr old is not a toddler he shouldn't be snooping in your stuff. You shouldn't have let your d***s be so easily accessible especially if he wasn't being supervised. And your parents shouldn't put their autistic 10yr old under the care of someone who didn't want to care for him.
ESH- parents for putting irresponsible teen in charge of 10yo autistic kid; teen for not keeping her d***s out of reach and for getting into d***s at all. Even at 19 marijuana has irreversible damaging effects on the brain. She may be 29 but she's not an adult in the mature sense of the word. Without knowing how bad the autism is-anytime there are children in the house medicines etc need to be keptout of reach.
Are you sure they weren't chocolate laxatives?
Any medications should be stored out of sight and reach of children at all times. 19295948-f...7b4614.jpg 
So... parents are making their teen daughter raise her little brother. If he's in school and parents work, there really should not be much time where the kids are alone in the house unless the parents are just out socialising all the time. Parentification. Kids aren't supposed to raise their siblings. And if your kid is using, the dumbest thing to do is to toss them out at first strike. Now she's living with a dealer, and her life is headed down a bad path. They should have discussed their concerns about her d**g use and listened to her when she said she was not comfortable with how much she had to care for her younger brother. They could have gotten her some counselling, gotten some family counselling, and figured out a way to move forward healthfully. But it looks like they've just tossed their eldest out the door because she isn't providing them enough services anymore.
Were does it say that the parents made her raise her own brother? To me she sounds like an entitled teen. 1.She admits being hungover even when writing this story. She uses d***s, legal and illegal while living at her parents. 2. Does she help wiyh anything at all in the house? Does she work, study or just parties and uses d***s? She does not mention helping out in any other way then babysitting her brother and even that she can't do. 3. Neither her nore some people commenting here seems to know anything about autism or how it works but you are eager to blame a 10 year old autistic kid rather then blame her, an almost adult person who do not want to take responsability for their own actions. Yes, parents should have known better then to ask her to babysit her brother cause she seems to care only about herself and just wants to keep partying and using d***s. And people are agreeing with her bs.... 🤷♀️
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WTF??? Nobody thinks it is criminal that father invaded a shower where teen girl was naked and vulnerable? Not ideal that she has dealer for harder stuff, but have been there myself. Just be aware of legal liability of being on the premises.
I don't think OP is the AH, but 10-11 is still kinda stupid and definitely requires a bit of hovering. I think your parents will regret having you moving into your dealer's house. Please everyone, be mindful of local homeless resources.
The weed is fine but taking other stuff outside the house too? Downward spiral to a terrible life
I have nothing to contribute to this discussion so I'm just going to say this: I recently got my first spaetzle pan and am looking forward to making my own spaetzle for the first time soon. Wish me luck. (or don't, it's completely up to you.)
If she kept them out of his reach then how did he reach them
Load More Replies... I think parents should not leave their autistic 10 year old to be reluctantly babysat by a 19 year old d**g user.
It’s understandable that they kicked her out - accidents happen but she doesn’t seem to accept any responsibility or show concern for her younger brother. However if they don’t let her live there any more then the 10 year old brother is going to feel guilty and upset about what happened, possibly forever.
Load More Replies... She is living with her d**g dealer now. That right there tells you how responsible she is. Kid is lucky he didn't get into her hard d***s.
I'm so concerned. I wish more people were aware of what homeless services were available in their area.
Load More Replies... Wow, I hope this is just another bored teen trolling the reddit. She lives at home and is a member of the family, helping each other out is part of the dynamic of a family. OP doesn't get to dictate the rules. She knew that her brother was under her care and basically flipped off her parents. Having d***s in the home, no matter where OP stored them, with a child in the home is STUPID and DANGEROUS. Kids snoop. And how bloody long was she in the shower that her brother was able to find the edibles, eat, get high and her parents returned home to find him in an obvious state, and she was STILL in the shower? OP sounds like an entitled AH. I am glad her parents booted her out, she is a danger to the family. And living with her dealer in a state where it is legal? Sounds fishy af.
Yes, this seemed fishy to me too. The times I've had edibles, it took 1.5 - 2 hours to start working... that's one heck of a long shower...
Load More Replies... If you live somewhere cannabis is legal and are of age to purchase it you don't need to stash your edibles in bags maked 'do not eat'. Legal edibles come in clearly marked packaging (usually with TCH levels in mg indicated) that a 10 year old should be able to discern is NOT normal candy. You also don't need a d**g dealer if you live somewhere weed is legal because you can buy it at a store, if you're of age. Also, being asked to watch your significantly younger sibling for a few hours on a weekend, PD day or holiday is normal.
If you want to do d***s, illegal or not, and are not a minor, get your own place or move in with people who share your views. You do you, but accept the consequences. Living together with ones family sadly comes with some responsibilities, especially for older siblings. More freedom = more responsibilities, including caring for family members. Why? 1. Running a household to offer care and shelter for a family is a team effort. Either one pays rent by money or duties. 2. It teaches you how to care for your very own family one day. However, if one is sure that a spouse and children are not their plans, then move out and live your life. 3. It is just a normal thing to do. Why would OP want to return "home" anyway?
I mean... she NTA for the situation, but sounds like a trashy person. 19 drunk and drugged out and complaining that locking up her pot is such a huge hassle.. she just sounds childish and insufferable and that last part "staying at my dealers house" sort of nail in the coffin for any sympathy for her. Its obvious where shes headed and why. If this is real its pathetic.
Not sure if this is genuine but her lack of concern for anyone but herself made my blood run cold.
I was with her until she went to her dealer's house. If pot is legal that means she's doing harder stuff, which is stupid as hell. I wouldn't want her around her little brother either!
There’s something missing from this story and I think it’s deliberate to try to get support. She claims he had ONE edible then says THEY were in a bag with ‘do not eat’ written on it. No 10 year old is going to find a bag of chocolates and only eat one. She’s trying to downplay the danger he was in. Also, how was her brother already high and crying when her parents got home if he went into her room while she was showering and she was still in the shower when they got home? That’s a pretty long shower. I’m suspecting her d**g use has addled her brain.
YTA and a junkie. You're talking about the legality of marijuana whilst suffering a hangover because you drank underage. You left edibles where your brother could easily obtain them, and they person you go running to when being kicked out of the house is one of your d**g dealers. Yeah, you have a bright future ahead s/. You need to get your s**t together. This is coming from a former junkie.
She is 19. There are no d***s that are legal for her here in the US because of her age. Her parents have tolerated her illegal d**g use of pot, but obviously once it interferes with the well-being of their special needs minor child, they're done putting up with it. My opinion is they should have put their foot down sooner... or maybe they did and that is why the shoe dropped so hard this time.
So YTA. You are lucky that all your parents did was kick you out. I did a quick google and here in Canada, you could be charged with criminal negligence, punishable by up to 10 years in jail, if you don’t lock up edibles and a child gets at them.
I honestly hope she gets help. As one of the comments said, why does she need a dealer if pot is legal in her state? Not saying her parents shouldn't respect her wishes on watching the kid.
When did BP become the immature drúg addict, poor me hour? Yikes!
I genuinely couldn't focus on her AITA part because I was so focused on how messed up her life is and she has no idea. She sounds awful.
Seems to be a lot missing from this stories, That last bit about doing harder d***s, really makes me wonder if there's truths mixed with lies, here. Addicts are great at telling poor me stories. Maybe, she gave her brother the chocolate, hoping to keep him quiet and out of her hair? Maybe, she was in the bathroom so long, because she was doing those hard d***s in there, and passed out? Maybe, little brother got scared for her, and that's why he called the parents, and was crying? Maybe, her parents put her in the shower, because she was ODing? I don't know, but they didn't kick her out over babysitting. They knew she had edibles in the house, and it's not unheard of for10 year old brothers to take things labeled "Do Not Eat",so I doubt it was over that either. Something more happened.
Watch your own damn kids unless the other person offers it.
I think that you are a dissapointment to your parents. Barely an adult, just 19, but not a particularly responsible person. More interested in your own vices than helping out your parents by simply minding their other kid for a short while. It's not as if he was a stranger or that you had to go somewhere else to do it. You don't strike me as a person to me trusted with anything important.
Esh. Your brother should know better than to steal from you. He might be autistic but a 10yr old is not a toddler he shouldn't be snooping in your stuff. You shouldn't have let your d***s be so easily accessible especially if he wasn't being supervised. And your parents shouldn't put their autistic 10yr old under the care of someone who didn't want to care for him.
ESH- parents for putting irresponsible teen in charge of 10yo autistic kid; teen for not keeping her d***s out of reach and for getting into d***s at all. Even at 19 marijuana has irreversible damaging effects on the brain. She may be 29 but she's not an adult in the mature sense of the word. Without knowing how bad the autism is-anytime there are children in the house medicines etc need to be keptout of reach.
Are you sure they weren't chocolate laxatives?
Any medications should be stored out of sight and reach of children at all times. 19295948-f...7b4614.jpg
So... parents are making their teen daughter raise her little brother. If he's in school and parents work, there really should not be much time where the kids are alone in the house unless the parents are just out socialising all the time. Parentification. Kids aren't supposed to raise their siblings. And if your kid is using, the dumbest thing to do is to toss them out at first strike. Now she's living with a dealer, and her life is headed down a bad path. They should have discussed their concerns about her d**g use and listened to her when she said she was not comfortable with how much she had to care for her younger brother. They could have gotten her some counselling, gotten some family counselling, and figured out a way to move forward healthfully. But it looks like they've just tossed their eldest out the door because she isn't providing them enough services anymore.
Were does it say that the parents made her raise her own brother? To me she sounds like an entitled teen. 1.She admits being hungover even when writing this story. She uses d***s, legal and illegal while living at her parents. 2. Does she help wiyh anything at all in the house? Does she work, study or just parties and uses d***s? She does not mention helping out in any other way then babysitting her brother and even that she can't do. 3. Neither her nore some people commenting here seems to know anything about autism or how it works but you are eager to blame a 10 year old autistic kid rather then blame her, an almost adult person who do not want to take responsability for their own actions. Yes, parents should have known better then to ask her to babysit her brother cause she seems to care only about herself and just wants to keep partying and using d***s. And people are agreeing with her bs.... 🤷♀️
Load More Replies... WTF??? Nobody thinks it is criminal that father invaded a shower where teen girl was naked and vulnerable? Not ideal that she has dealer for harder stuff, but have been there myself. Just be aware of legal liability of being on the premises.
I don't think OP is the AH, but 10-11 is still kinda stupid and definitely requires a bit of hovering. I think your parents will regret having you moving into your dealer's house. Please everyone, be mindful of local homeless resources.
The weed is fine but taking other stuff outside the house too? Downward spiral to a terrible life
I have nothing to contribute to this discussion so I'm just going to say this: I recently got my first spaetzle pan and am looking forward to making my own spaetzle for the first time soon. Wish me luck. (or don't, it's completely up to you.)
If she kept them out of his reach then how did he reach them
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