The Best And Worst Transformations Seen During School Reunions, As Shared By These 30 Internet Users
Teachers are there for you during one of the most important parts of your life: childhood. They see the way you change, what you grow up to be like, and then send you off to live your life. The next time teachers see their students is probably during reunions, where the kids are now adults with jobs and maybe even families of their own.
This Reddit user decided to ask teachers that go to reunions a lot to share what changes people usually go through and whether there are any common patterns or maybe even some sad decline stories they have to share, and it made for a very interesting online thread. So keep on scrolling to read some of the best answers we gathered.
What kind of changes did you notice after finishing high school or university? If you have any interesting stories to share, you can do so in the comment section below!
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I know that this is a reach-out to teachers but I want to do a shout-out to a teacher.
I attended only my 20th year reunion in 1999, and only because I had to return home to my family because my step-mother was dying. I had left town the day after graduation and never looked back.
A math teacher who taught calculus and coached football was so amazing in our school and our community that the whole town had created a day devoted to him and named it "Garvin Day." He was retiring that year.
He was a man of quiet intensity. I remember his catching me and some friends smoking in the boiler room and he looked at each of us intently. "I don't think that's very smart to smoke in here. I'd have thought y'all were smarter than this."
It was a Catholic college prep school with very strict rules that had any other teacher caught us, we would have been expelled.
Coach Garvin had such patience in his ways, and he worked every angle to get us to understand math. He listened and when he spoke, he spoke to each one of us.
So on the day I roll up to the school, there was a line the whole length of the football field to say hey to Coach Garvin. I couldn't wait to see him although I doubted he'd remember little ole me after 20 years!
It took me almost an hour to hear him speak my name, as he had spoken each other name of every one of us in that line I imagine.
"How have you been? What have you been doing? You still smoking?"
We contacted Laura Martocci who has a Ph.D. in Sociology and asked her about this topic. First of all, we wondered if school reunions are important to have at all: “Reunions are not important or unimportant in and of themselves. They are important to some people, and unimportant to others. What is important is to understand why you do or do not want to attend—and to know that either choice is right, because it comes down to what’s right for you."
I missed my 10 years reunion but I went to 15 years.
As some said, most people came to impress others. I don‘t care, I was there to see a guy I was friends with in school. He was a very intelligent dude, but clearly had a problem with authorities. When we got older, he worked as a chemist and also liked drugs. Back in the days, we used to smoke pot regularly but he found other friends and things for worse. Like cooking-meth-and-get-your-door kicked-in-weekly-by-cops-or-russians-worse.
Last thing I heard, he wenn to jail for a couple of years.
When I met him at the reunion, he was also happy to see me. We talked almost the whole evening, it was great. What I liked the most, he found a wife when he got out of jail, she supported him to get rid of an heroin-addiction he „got“ in jail and he‘s a proud father of two kids. Nice transformation.
My grandpa invited his English teacher from high school to their 60th HS reunion. She was 97 at the time (101 now) and is sharp as a tack. She had a wonderful time seeing everyone and even remembered a good portion of her students, but did mention that it was disheartening to see students of hers who have died or are suffering from dementia.
If my math is right, she was a 19 or 20 year old highschool teacher. A 60th reunion would put the alumni at around 77 or 78 years old, the teacher was 97. My point being that Teacher probably had more in common with her senior students than her fellow instructors.
***correction: As soon as I posted this, I saw my error she was more like 38...my mistake.
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Aw , that's so bittersweet. Grand old lady still caring for her students. Well done the OPS's Grampa.
"Also, if you want to attend, be clear about your expectations. As I said in a blog for Psychology Today: Identify, before you go, what ‘having a good time’ would look like. Getting up the nerve to chat with a former crush? Networking? Introducing your partner to your high school world? Or simply feeling secure (or adventurous) enough to attend just to sate your curiosity?"
I'll share an uplifting one. Not a teacher, btw. It was at my classes' ten-year reunion.
One of the people who showed up was, well, to put it bluntly, I had never thought much of them when graduation happened. They just kind of coasted through, had been a bully when they were younger, definitely didn't take class seriously (not that I ever saw) etc.
They didn't go on to be a CEO or something. Anyone can do that. No, instead they got married, found responsibility, and now had several kids. They were raising a family and trying to be a good parent and spouse. They'd found work they enjoyed and that paid well so they could support that family with a good life.
And then? They went up to people at that reunion who they recalled setting an example or giving them a template to build on and thanked them for it. Which is ... It left me dumbstruck. That takes humility and strength.
That is an epic transformation. From just someone who was there probably because they had to be to someone who'd found their being. I was really glad to hear they were doing so well, and see how much they'd changed.
I don't ever expect to come back at the 20 and see them running some giant company or anything. But I expect I'll respect them just as highly (probably a bit more, honestly).
Huh, this year would be my 20th anniversary.
I can't think of anything I'd rather do less, than see all those people. There are exactly 2 of them I'd like to see again.
"How does s/he look all these years later, and who is doing (and wearing) what? On average, only 40% of people attend their reunions. What can we say about the 60% that do not attend? Are they all missing an important event? Or are the people who DO attend mistaken in believing it important to do [so]?
People attend their reunions, first and foremost, to reconnect with their former friends. Expect that old cliques will re-cohere, hang out, and catch up with each other. You would—and likely will—do the same. Having reconnected, some will begin to peel off, mingle, and move beyond the old crowd—and may be open to connect with people they barely knew in school. It is important to remember that reunions are not in the business of ‘redemption.’ If attending your reunion is important to you because you want to show people who you have become, be honest with yourself about this hope or expectation."
Not a teacher but there was a really remarkable transformation in mine.
There was a kid in my high school who was, for lack of a better term, a huge f**k up. Lots of drugs, really overweight, constantly getting suspended, getting in fights, trouble with the law, etc.
So I show up to my 10 year reunion, And there is this guy there that nobody recognizes. Tall, long hair, muscular, pretty good looking. It’s the same guy. Literally none of us could picture him so he had to show us old photos on his phone. He told me that after high school he got a job cleaning pools, which “saved his life” according to him. It was really tough work which got him in shape, and helped him kick drugs and gave him a purpose. Eventually he started his own pool cleaning business and has since expanded it enough that he makes fantastic money and doesn’t even work 40 hours a week, and it’s still growing.
It sounded like he had some demons to work through, but he literally went from being somebody we all kinda expected to spend his life in jail, to arguably being the best looking guy at the reunion, making more money than almost anyone there, and just having a huge turnaround. Probably the biggest talk of the night, and honestly, I think everyone was really impressed. I know I was. He deserved all the kudos he got.
Half my grade didn’t event get invited to our 10 year. Seems just like the popular kids just invited themselves
I've always felt that the kinds of people that that arrange 10 - 20 - 25 year HS Reunions, are the kids from HS that I never want to see again.
"Many of us attend wanting to let others see our success—see who we’ve become. If this is the sole or main reason you attend, there is a good chance you will be disappointed—perhaps find that you feel as invisible as you did in school (even Janis Joplin wasn’t accorded the attention and affirmation she believed her success would bring her at her HS reunion). Invisibility-–especially when we have worked on ourselves, grown, and [worked] so hard to succeed—is itself demoralizing. Finally, many of [us] portray ourselves on social media in ways we suspect we cannot live up to—and attending our reunion presents all kinds of psychological challenges to us."
I was one of the valedictorians and got voted most likely to become president, I dated the same guy most of the way through high school and married him in college.
10 years down the way, I was divorced and on disability for mental illness. I was actually afraid to go to the reunion because things were TOTALLY different. I don't know why, but I seriously thought people would think bad of me for getting a divorce.
Our school did something interesting for the reunion. One part was a formal sit down dinner that cost something like $80. But another part was a free BBQ down at the local park. I went to the freebie. Everyone was pretty casual. Very few of the former popular crowd came - guess they just wanted to show off at the formal dinner.
Lots of other people there had been honors students and had also gotten a harsh smack in the face by life. Lots of the valedictorians and honors students failed out of college by sophomore year. I know a couple of them had gone through rehab. I was surprised to find I wasn't the only one who was mentally ill - we'd all apparently been REALLY good at hiding it in high school.
A lot of people got into fields no one would have pegged them for. The shyest girl worked as a pharma rep, scrawny dorky kid was now absolutely ripped and in the military. I'd been known as a writer and journalist, but I know several people were surprised to hear I'd primarily worked as a computer tech.
So I'd worked myself up for nothing. I was glad I went. I'm guessing the school didn't bother to do anything for 20th or 25th, or maybe the former popular kids decided having a free event again was gauche.
its really common for “gifted” and smart kids to fail outside of school. mostly because they’re entire life has been about how smart they are. it’s also really common for gifted kids to be mentally ill or have mental health disorders. source: a former gifted kid
My dad came to the US when he was ten and didn't speak a word of English. Ended up being class valedictorian and winning all twelve of the school's academic prizes, getting a full ride to Harvard, and becoming a professor. At his 50th high school reunion, a woman came up to my mom and angrily said "Everyone always talks about how your husband won all twelve prizes. But that's not true! My husband won one of them!"
Obviously, some hurts never go away.
We asked Laura Martocci if people change after school: "We all change. The thing about this question is we all assume we know what ‘change a lot’—and good vs bad change—looks like/means. Also, there is a real double standard about change. If we see evidence of ‘positive change’—success, clothing, appearance, etc.—we might bitchily say we know the ‘real person’ under all the designer clothes and body work. But if a popular, confident peer has ‘let themselves go’ we don’t assume that this is a reflection of the ‘real person’ underneath the school superstar."
All I know is I got super drunk with my favorite teacher at our 5-year reunion. She’s amazing. She’s a romance writer, not above a stupid prank, and a ton of fun. It’s not the only time we got drunk together. Seeing different a side to teachers is interesting as an adult.
Facebook ruined class reunions for me. So I quit Facebook. It was like a class reunion every f*****g day
Yes. Didn't go to reunion recently. People asked me to come to "catch up" meaning "compare". No, thanks.
"Instead, we think it unfortunate that they have come upon hard times (unless we were cruelly bullied and are glad of their current status). Most of us believe we have made mistakes, grown, and changed. But ‘growth and change’ can be deep and subtle and not on display for all to see. Unfortunately, a focus on change (which we all have—the curiosity is irresistible) rests on a ‘then/now’ comparison that is steeped in judgments. Think about it—the judgments that we passed in the hallways, cafeteria, or on the bus are integrally part of (the cornerstone of) our current assessments."
10yr - trying to impress with wife a kid and fancy job
20yr - 2nd wife 2nd round of kids, same or similar job
30yr - trying to not be the largest person there
40yr - just trying to outlive the other people
Those that leap frog in a career - or are considered “Lucky” in life - rarely go to HS reunions. HS reunions are ridiculously full of drama and gossip.
Somehow, some people still managed to bring their high school attitudes to those reunions despite being 5, 10, 20, 30, 40, 50 years older...
Not a teacher.
Didn't get invited to my 5 year or my 10 year (actually happening in two months), I got arrested for doing something real stupid my freshman year of college, spent a year in jail and 3 more on probation, and then when I reached out to the alumni organizing the 5 year they told me I would not be allowed into the event if I showed up. When I asked why they said "its just best if you don't come". The few friends I still had from high school tried to convince the organizers otherwise, but by then I had said I didn't want to go anyway so they let it drop.
I totally lied. I wish with all my heart that I could go and it's one of the worst feelings I ever felt being told that I couldn't.
We also asked her if there are some common patterns in which people change after school: “If there is a pattern, it is looking for the chance to make a fresh start—to find out who we really are when all the people who have trapped us in particular identities no longer determine our social selves.”
Lastly, we wondered if we even start acting like our old selves when we attend our high school reunions: “Absolutely. When others position us in their stories, we are assigned our old roles. And when there is no reason for them to reposition and redefine us, we slip into the same old ‘emotion dances.’ And we hate ourselves for doing it."
My brother in law went to an unofficial 7 year reunion. People kept getting in fights over stuff that happened in high school, he hasn't bothered going to another one.
I would't mind going to one, but I'm not going to travel literally from one coast to another just to see people who haven't been part of my life for over 30 years.
For the 20th, it was decided to have the reunion in Las Vegas for everyone who didn't want to travel to Alaska. Towards the end it was 1 guy and 6 girls, from the same friend group and me and two of my friends. It was interesting to see everybody but the only reason I went was because I already lived in Las Vegas. Otherwise, I would have stayed home.
We just had our 20 y reunion a few months ago and it was honestly great. Most people showed up, plus a few of the teachers. We‘ve always been a relative unpretentious bunch with everyone somewhat getting along. And it was still sort of like that. We all sort of clicked right away. And we basically had no unexpected transformations, neither positive nor negative. The ones who were expected to pick up a high rolling career did and the ones expected to surf along in the middleclass did as well. The were a few outliers (like the cool skateboarding bloke who wasn’t really good in school was now a medical doctor with family and kids). But all in all, it had all turned out more or less as expected. On paper that sounds horrifically boring. But in reality it was incredibly nice to see everyone had made something of themselves and you‘d still get along, even after 20 years.
"Old patterns not only renew feelings of shame, they compound them: we should not be feeling or acting this way. But because we are, we turn on ourselves, and negative self-judgments ooze into our psyche. Before beating ourselves up too badly, we should recall that neural pathways and ‘stimulus-response patterns’ have a lot to do with how easily we slip back into old ‘emotion dances.’ The good news is that, with work, we can create alternate pathways. And it is important to know that whatever you feel is legitimate."
If you want to read more of Laura’s work, click here or here!
So not a teacher. Just giving my story of my 10 year reunion from 2 years ago.
One girl in high school had uncut hair to the floor, jean skirts, some religious thing. Her dad was an a*****e, and his girl friend wore tight shirts and short skirts with spray on tan and cheap blonde hair dye. Absolute definition of hypocritical a*****e parents. The son/brother was treated like a king and had absolutely no parenting - all while the girl and her two sisters were taught to do all the chores and take care of the dad/girlfriend/brother. She grew up to be a religious nutjob that went further down that rabbit hole and believe that blowing up abortion clinics is totally cool. She hasn't done it yet, but she's rather vocal about it. She sat next to everyone at some point in the reunion and tried to figure out what political affiliation everyone was to start fights.
One guy that never took anything seriously went to some branch of the military and got his life together. He's a car mechanic now and is a much nicer guy.
And then me... I was a quiet nerd girl and still am. Except I came in to the parklot on my motorcycle (which I had for a while but didn't think was a big deal) and everyone thought it was a huge deal that nerdy me rode motorcycles now. I have a cheap one and it wasn't hard to learn. Apparently being able to hold normal conversations (which I could do before) and riding a motorcycle was a "huge transformation". I think everyone thought I was somehow shy or weird when I was just quiet and didn't want to talk to them when I was a teenager. So having polite conversation from me blew their minds.
Commenting literally to make the other comment stop showing as the top comment.
My first two years there was a kid who was very troubled. Complete disruption, immature, defiant. He was caught selling Xanax, was almost put up for expulsion and graduated after doing just enough independent study work...
A few years later he showed up to the reunion a completely different person. Tall, in shape, confident, well-spoken and he had just passed his exam to become an x-ray technician. He had very normal conversations with staff members and I about budgeting so he could save up for a nicer house and other appropriate topics. If you’d have known this kid when he was in his teens never in a billion years would you have thought you’d have that kind of conversation with him. Very proud of him.
Since I was still in school, I couldn’t wait to attend my reunions; I imagined we’re all finally our fully developed selves, over the pettiness and cliques, able to converse as adults.
I flew across the country to attend my 10th reunion. It was small, and awkward, and there were a LOT of single moms with 10-year-olds. It was in our town’s local bro-pub. No one spoke to me then either.
Did not attend 20th.
I attended my 10th and my (40th or 50th ?) and had a totally boring time at both. I went to the last one only because my bff had begged me to because She wanted to very badly.. As it turned out, she never made it to the reunion because of an unfortunate occurrence with her diabetIc medications landing her in the hospital. (She had had the ticket and paid reservations already too and was supposed to meet me at Minneapolis International airport.but never showed up at the gate.) I ended up going to a reunion I could not have been Less interested in attending. I did not bother even responding to the last invitation for the 60th reunion. Without my friend to go with there was and is no reason to go to a reunion anymore. (My bff died in 2001 of a stroke.)
Our school had a 3 strike rule
Even to drugs. I was the supply teacher that people liked and talked to, I helped a kid when his parents were on drugs, it turned out he was on drugs to. Weeks after that he just looked tired and warn out. Next time I see him he’s happy, cheerful and a great looking guy he would no longer have to keep his head down, he was no longer the weird kid that everyone stays away from
I like the poetic story of my moms bully who said "I would totally date you!... if you wore a bag over your head!"
Not really sure how she looked growing up but she became beautiful when she was more like 20s, then ended up being a counselor. 100$ or more per hour, making her own schedule. He ended up digging ditches.
I have a similar story about my mom's former bully. She came out as lesbian, turns out that she was a total tool because she was fighting herself in accepting it. She also became a middle school gym coach. A good one too. I had her for 5th grade. She pulled me aside one day and asked if I was (my mom's name)'s kid because she recognized my last name. She then said to tell my mom that she regrets torturing her all those years.
So... Not a teacher and only been to one School reunion - after about 15-20 years
We got in contact via 'friendsreunited' (if anyone remembers that) and I was chatting with a couple of people in the weeks leading up to the reunion
I was making jokes about seeing a girl - Carol - who everyone wanted to 'be friends' with. Making jokes about how she was a flirt and probably had been through a couple of husbands by now, when someone informed me that she had died of cancer at age 20
Once at the reunion, I asked 'whatever happened to Gary L'... Gary was a joker, he was friends with everyone and, somehow, able to fit in with all the different factions at school.
I was told that Good ol' Gary was in prison, on multiple counts of Possession of CP
You wouldn't catch me dead at one of those things, but thanks to Facebook snooping (very carefully so I don't accidentally like photos or friend anyone) I have seen some interesting things. The prom king is still cool, the prom queen is some kind of big wig in the army and the quiet nice kid is a body builder. The popular kids are the keeping up with the Joneses types. Nothing impressive except lots of hair dye and Botox.
I hope someone snooped through mine to see that I still listen to backstreet boys and kept the two best friends I had back than. We took different paths but we're all still the same only older and smarter.
My class organized the last one using Facebook to locate lost classmates. One of the girls contacted replied with a “don’t ever contact me again” response. The thing was, I got the vibe it was because she was being abused and not because she didn’t like her classmates. I went to my 20-year and it was okay. But I really don’t have an interest in going back for another. It’s like you in some ways revert your behavior to the last time you hung out together. I’ve had 4 or 5 classmates pass away over the years. Heart attack, car wreck, cancer.
Be thankful, I've had 4 of my old schoolmates shuffle off in the last year. I was close to all of them as we all attended an all boys boarding school back in the '70's and had our formative years up to age 17 growing up and living together. RIP. Stephen, Dave, Rob and Tom. They were all in their early 60's btw ...
I went to my 40th anniversary. Class of 300 seniors, around 100 showed up. It was surprising how the cliques from high school instantly re-emerged.
At 57, I was still in good shape, had all my hair, hardly any gray. That put me in a pretty small minority of the guys. Lots of bald guys with gray hair on the sides.
Some of the hottest girls from high school were not remotely good looking any more, while some of the normal looking girls who were nice back then were still nice and were more beautiful than ever.
Some of the people would say stuff like “Oh, I’m retired now. Cashed in my stock from Blah buh dee dah.” Or, “I now just work part time for the investment firm I started thirty years ago.” A few were hoping that old connections could help them find work.
I didn’t bring my wife or kids, but a few people did. Those who did seemed like they were doing it to say “I know you thought I’d never find a girl” but realistically they were probably thinking “Whatever, I haven’t thought about you even once since high school.”
I didn’t stay too long, but it was nice to see some people. I’d go back for the 50th if I make it to 67 and haven’t moved too far away.
My 10 year reunion had 2 different parties.
1st one hosted by the old student council was a 2 day event with 1st day being just the class and the 2nd day being family as well. Cost was to put up x amount for a hotel, food, etc.
2nd one was by the popular kids who thought the first one was stupid (I agree) and just rent out a bar and have a good time.
I went to neither because I only talk to maybe 3 people from high school and really didn't care. Plus I'm fatter now and no one needs to see that lol.
Obligatory, I am not a teacher and so this is not quite on topic, it just stirs up a thought or two, personally.
I was class President, in charge of organizing reunions. Small town, small school. I didn't see the point in a five year reunion, I told everyone in our class facebook group. A few people still banded together to do something but to my knowledge it didn't really take form.
We approach 8 1/2 years and there's activity on the class Facebook group, people already talking about the ten year reunion. I realize people have work and families but if the reunion were to be held in the summer the start of this conversation would be about 20 months ahead of time.
Not faulting people for being excited either. But they were frustrated. Once the discussion started these dozen or so people seemed basically panicked that they had not heard anything about it at that point. I hadn't considered doing anything extravagant, I'd barely considered it at all honestly, and assumed 10-12 months would be ample time for those interested to make plans for a Saturday evening, and I figured it was best to poll everyone for a convenient date.
But these people didn't waste much time before starting into some passive-aggressive s**t talk (some of it not so passive at all, come to think of it). Within 24 hrs they were already considering voting someone new to take charge, among about the dozen of them.
A few people popped in here or there to ask why they were so worked up so early, and a few others kind of came to my defense. But a number of those in that group talked about speaking to a convincing number of other classmates, many by name, and expressed that those others had concerns too.
What I assumed would be a relaxed event and simple planning process suddenly seemed like a massive pain in the a*s. No chance did I have the dedication to deliver them the event they felt they deserved.
I posted my 'official resignation' in the group and wished them luck. They elected the wrong guy... I never realized til then what those high school years and/or reliving them for an evening might mean to people. Since graduating high school I've neither been successful or a total failure, maybe that prevents me from feeling the same, one way or the other. I hate to admit this, not even sure if it's really accurate, but I think their excitement turned me off the idea. Or maybe it was just overwhelming or intimidating.
Did what I thought was best. Did it make me secretly a little butthurt, yeah a bit I guess. But it also felt like a weight was lifted. I don't know how the reunion went, or if they even wound up doing one. And while I legitimately liked every single one of my classmates, missing out on the possible reunion doesn't really bother me... Kind of having my character called into question over something I hadn't considered a huge priority, however, did rub me a little wrong.
I had my 10 year reunion last summer and like I predicted hardly anyone showed up. I was so jazzed to go because of all the cartoons I watched growing up as a kid talking about reunions and I showed up to this empty hall and was like, "Yep, we always keep the bar low around here."
my school has one every year for all classes, so sometimes parents and children will go together and sometimes even grandparents.
My one friend went and from what I've heard the only people there graduated before 95, none of the younger generations showed up save a few who were just curious to see what it is.
Its all Karens and 40 to 50-year-old men who pretend like they all graduated a few years ago. The same type of people who constantly brag about that one game where they won the season and talk about nothing else, and middle-aged suburban housewives trying to sell mlms while asking to speak to the coach of their son's little league team to get him more time on the field.
My 10 year happened at the bar I worked at. I never got an invite but I dropped out so I didn't expect one. I had a bit of a drinking problem at that time and managed to get myself fired the morning of the reunion. So I didn't crash the party like I had planned.
Not a teacher and I didn't go to my 10 year but I did fill out one of those "where they now" things with Bill Gates information. Tried to make it nit super obvious. "Spent a few years in school but didn't finish. Started a successful software company but now I spend most of my time running a foundation with my wife Melinda. Currently reside in Seattle." I wonder if anyone fell for it.
There's a lot of comments here about the "Popular kids", but that seems rather silly. They are a social group who communicate, and the others... aren't. Why is there no one here saying that "all of the non popular kids threw a reunion"?
I went to my 10 year, about 50 people out of about 600 were there... and even still, I hung out ONLY with my friends who I had maintained contact with anyway.
How to say I was one of the mean b*tches without saying I was one of the mean b*tches 🤷🏼♀️
Went to my 30th in November, flew there just to go to the reunion. Reconnected with my favorite teacher from high school, who was the same age I am now when she taught me. Told her she had to go to the reunion and she had a blast. So glad I went especially in light of everything now. Made a point of telling the people who were good and kind to me what they did and how it still impacts me.
I was part of the planning committee for our 30th. I wanted to it be a weekend attire. Mix with so much fun for people with families and those with none as our 10 year was a bomb. Then one person who had our deposit $$$$ refused to put a deposit down for our meal and then changed everything.
At the last month he had it it a pub of his friends and gave our money without consent to the owner of the pub and a small portion to our old school. I spent 100s of hours finding people who moved and many that changed names when I asked for my $15 of LD they wanted receipts. I then pulled out as my sweat equity was worth more than $15. Right before our reunion a group of us went out and had so much fun with any nonsense.
Now they are trying to have a 35th while COVID19 is occurring. Good Grief Charlie Brown.
My life has moved on from high school 35 years ago. The people that care about me I still talk now and most are easy to find one another the rest are just stuck.
Everyone is going to hate this, but I'm way older than most people here and our reunion just never happened. I don't use facebook anymore, but personally I blame facebook. There's really no motivation for anyone to go to a reunion because you can see everybody's life in way too much detail without getting off your couch or inviting them into your life. After reading the responses, this obviously isn't just my school. That said, I graduated well over 10 years ago (since that's the going number apparently).
Our story is basically that our class president was left responsible for organizing the reunion after graduation. The thing is that she never ended up amounting to anything, so at the 5 year mark she left a message on facebook saying "well everybody has just graduated college so there's no point." Then at the 10 year reunion there was no explanation, but a bunch of students harassed her about it on facebook constantly. Eventually she tried to organize one, but nobody wanted to invest any money at all into it (as in," I can't afford to spend $10 on a lunch" and "who is going to watch my kids if I go out one night in a year" stuff).
I was invited to a pseduo-reunion that happened at a bar kind of in the spur of the moment because I was running around my hometown when it was happening.Apparently this is a huge source of debate in this thread but, in our case, the guy who "organized" it was something of a pretentious a*****e from very rich parents who ended up very mediocre and I highly suspect he started trying to get a bunch of people to show up in order to see how he socially compared to everyone there. From going there, basically 99% of the people from high school that I met were exactly the same people they were in high school. Some of the people peaked in high school, lived it out as the "best time of their lives," and settled into the mediocrity of raising 2.5 kids and punching a clock between 9 to 5 in their early 20s.
Most of the people I knew who went on to do something with their lives weren't there. They were in other states or very far away.
The closest to a reunion thing I've attended was the retirement party for my favourite teacher, about seven years after graduation. I knew a few of the students attending and most of the teachers, so in a way it was reunionish. In school I was always very sickly, so when I showed up with a cane I guess some people assumed I was finally dying. In reality I was just recovering from a fracture and was feeling too well to bother with crutches but not confident enough to bring nothing.
I'm not a teacher. I went to a rural school so my class was like 80 people. Our 10 year reunion was literally an elevated high school party. We had a couple classmates that passed so we had the memorial table lined with shots for them from everyone. People I hated in high school were trying to catch up with me. No one was trying to out do one another. Honestly it was a blast. Really reconnected with a lot of people from back then, even the guy who always gave me s**t in english.
I often wonder what my teachers would think of me. I was the bullied kid. Graduated in 2007. Technically only took one semester of my senior year as I had enough credits to skip the second semester. Most of my teachers honestly gave a s**t.
There wasn’t a ten year reunion. Our class had the unexpected loss like a year after graduation. Classmate’s heart just up and stopped in the middle of the night. Never got an explanation beyond that.
I wonder what my classmates are up to. Kept a few tabs. One has a bakery. Dozen cookies for $36. I’ve had her baking, was in home ec with her, her baking is utter s**t. I could run circles around her in the kitchen. Do I feel bad dissing her baking? Nope, she was one of my bullies. And $3 a cookie is highway robbery.
I wonder if there’ll be a fifteen year reunion. Still got two years until then. And at that point it’ll be a dozen years at my current job. Tenure adds security.
After reading these, I'm just glad High school reunions aren't really a thing over here.
I went to four different high schools. Senior year was in Asia through a correspondence course with U of Nebraska. Lost touch with the two other people that were in the same "school" in the same country and also graduated in 1969 and the one girl that was allowed to be a senior at the American school. Much to my surprise even though a few people I had known there lived within 180 miles they had no interest in meeting. Somehow I lost interest in doing anything like that. Did go to reunion for parents and kids that were in that country about thirty years ago. Kinda fun but there were still some of the younger people in the "I'm still a s**t!" mode so a few years later took the wife and kids and we spent about two weeks seeing the country. Like to go back while I am still able...don't care to go in a group.
My ten year reunion was planned for later this year. I dunno about that with coronavirus now though.
I was really looking forward to it. I was a weird, socially awkward kid in high school. I had friends who were into anime and fanfics etc but I never shared their interests and they never shared mine. Now that I have some social skills and know myself better I’d actually be really interested to meet all the others in my grade again. Out of 200+ girls (well mostly girls sorry, I only know of one who’s transitioned), I feel sure there must be at least one person out there who shares some interests or a sense of humour or something with me!!
I have a rule about these, I won't show up unless I truly feel like I'm well accomplished, and I won't talk about it unless asked. So far, I'm on a pretty good road to that, looking like the 15 year reunion will be my first appearance.
I can think of nothing I'd like less than seeing my ex-class. All we had in common was we were in the same classes. *shudders*
This. Most of the people who were popular were selfish, arrogant pricks who I have zero desire to have dinner with, Reunions are thrown by the popular ones who want to humble-brag about their successes.
Load More Replies... Dang. The only school reunion I’ve ever heard of was Romy and Michelle’s. Never realized this was an actual thing.
Same! I thought they an exaggeration for American films and TV, like when people make a huge breakfast on a week day.
Load More Replies... I switched schools before senior year, I got invites from 2 schools for the 10 & 20 year, didn't go to any. Bump into old classmates once in a while, I say they have the wrong person when they try to talk to me.
I never went to any of mine. Sent a nasty note on one of them when they wanted a reply to "whatwas the time/memory that makes you smile the most?" ~ "oh, I don't know! Maybe the time you all threw rocks at me, etc etc". Worst part was they kept sending me invites until I wrote "STOP HARASSING ME" on the envelope and sent it back return to sender. I *still* at age 46 almost vomit every morning because the mornings were such heck for me. Especially if I hear a school bus.
I'd be curious to see what happened to everyone. After all, I went to an arts high school but ended up with a PhD in a STEM field. But I'm not curious enough to join FB to find out. It's like clockwork: every time I realize I'm missing social events and think maybe I should finally join, within 3 weeks a new huge scandal comes out. And I don't mean the dirty laundry that actually gets aired like every 3 weeks, I mean like the Cambridge Analytica scandal or when the whistleblower told the news media about that buried study showing Instagram usage correlated with self harm and mental disorders in teens.
I moved when I was in 9th grade. Really horrible time for a girl to move! We moved in the dead of January. I was shy, and a 1:1 person, still am. I had many interests, Art, Swimming and just trying to fit in. Let’s call her “Jen” The bus left the swim meet and I did well, I was happy and giggling with the girls, as girls do. “Jen” asserts her authority and berates me “You think you are so cool…..” I was broken. Thank God for the Grace of my Mother I only went to one HS reunion - 5 years (after college) “Jen” Raced to me, I was not sure who she was…. She was divorced, two children and the “wear on her face” 26 year old should not be so profoundly evident I thought I would feel triumphant, I just felt sad. Bullies shame and must live with themselves Kindness and support does not cost a thing And no, it is irrelevant to me what has happened to her, it is her path. I am a lucky woman and have my bridges as we all do and yes, some wounds do make you stronger.
I was popular I was a nerd. I got along with EVERYONE. I didn't bother to go to 10 or 20 cause why???? I didn't talk to those people while I was in school I was too busy trying to get out of school. I did extra curriculars like step team cheerleading and modeling but I wouldn't consider the other people in those clubs friends.
I can't imagine going to a reunion.... I talk to maybe two people I graduated with regularly. One of them because we ended up at the same college, and the other because she was my best friend then and we still vent about stupid people and send cute animal videos to one another. But I honestly cannot see myself going to see the former honors kids who are now struggling for normalcy, the Chick-fil-A employees, and the couple who had a kid less than six months after graduation. Thanks, but no thanks, I'm doing just fine without them.
Next year it will be 40 years since I left school. I don't remember many of the people there and have never even considered wanting to get in contact with them. School was awful. I was quiet, withdrawn and relentlessly bullied. I don't understand why anyone would want to get together with these people.
I dropped out so I will never have the chance to debate go or not go
I have no interest in going to any of my HS reunions. We didn't even have one for our 10 years unless I just didn't know about it. Next year will be 15, so we'll see. The only people I actually want to see and talk to from HS are people I'm already in contact with and still friends with from HS. So, no thanks. I thought I was the odd one out with this attitude, I'm really glad to see this seems to be the common viewpoint.
I responded to some of these but gave up after halfway. Just too depressing.
Went to my 10 yr. Was bullied and harassed thru hs. All the popular pretty girls were now housewives (which is ok) looks gone. I had blossomed and they were still trying to harass me with comments to each other. Quarterback comes mentions he didn't think graduated since he didn't see much my sr yr. I was taking classes at local Jr college. 30 yrs homecoming including 3 yrs of graduates. My bff and I go )(we're a yr apart) he drops me at the door and I start hearing comments again trying to make fun of me once again. It stopped fast when I started getting attention from all the men including married ones. Nothing about me really changed but my self esteem and not giving a c**p about his idiots.y bff and I decided were not going back to any reunions. Those popular girls are probably divorced and trying to get men in tinder. I get asked out by men 30 yrs younger just by being myself. Ive been divorced since 1995. And I'm almost 63
I went to my 10 year reunion at the informal "get together" at a local bar. I would say that while cliques still largely gravitated towards one another, there was a lot of mixing going on. FB became popular only a few years after we graduated and while I did maintain a lot of friendships from HS, mere acquaintances became friends after. I think that made a huge difference on how we interacted at the reunion. Instead of my normal friend group from HS, there were many people from outside the group that joined, and we would all break off and join other groups. There was no drama, put downs, one-upping. We were all generally happy to see each other and no one felt left out or alone. I'm sad that I missed my 20th. I got back home from vaca the same night as the reunion, and had many messages the next day from most of my graduating class about how much I was missed. It was a nice feeling. I wasn't "popular" but I also wasn't disliked by most.
I absolutely hated high-school. Did not graduate. I have only spoken to a few friends from back then. Since I got rid of FB, I only speak to 1 friend now. I found a few on Classmates, one decided to play games because he thought I laughed at him when we were teenagers. (I didn't) Some people never move on. The one friend that I still talk to, asked me last year if I got my invite for the upcoming reunion, I said,"Nope, I didn't graduate, remember?"
I can think of nothing I'd like less than seeing my ex-class. All we had in common was we were in the same classes. *shudders*
This. Most of the people who were popular were selfish, arrogant pricks who I have zero desire to have dinner with, Reunions are thrown by the popular ones who want to humble-brag about their successes.
Load More Replies... Dang. The only school reunion I’ve ever heard of was Romy and Michelle’s. Never realized this was an actual thing.
Same! I thought they an exaggeration for American films and TV, like when people make a huge breakfast on a week day.
Load More Replies... I switched schools before senior year, I got invites from 2 schools for the 10 & 20 year, didn't go to any. Bump into old classmates once in a while, I say they have the wrong person when they try to talk to me.
I never went to any of mine. Sent a nasty note on one of them when they wanted a reply to "whatwas the time/memory that makes you smile the most?" ~ "oh, I don't know! Maybe the time you all threw rocks at me, etc etc". Worst part was they kept sending me invites until I wrote "STOP HARASSING ME" on the envelope and sent it back return to sender. I *still* at age 46 almost vomit every morning because the mornings were such heck for me. Especially if I hear a school bus.
I'd be curious to see what happened to everyone. After all, I went to an arts high school but ended up with a PhD in a STEM field. But I'm not curious enough to join FB to find out. It's like clockwork: every time I realize I'm missing social events and think maybe I should finally join, within 3 weeks a new huge scandal comes out. And I don't mean the dirty laundry that actually gets aired like every 3 weeks, I mean like the Cambridge Analytica scandal or when the whistleblower told the news media about that buried study showing Instagram usage correlated with self harm and mental disorders in teens.
I moved when I was in 9th grade. Really horrible time for a girl to move! We moved in the dead of January. I was shy, and a 1:1 person, still am. I had many interests, Art, Swimming and just trying to fit in. Let’s call her “Jen” The bus left the swim meet and I did well, I was happy and giggling with the girls, as girls do. “Jen” asserts her authority and berates me “You think you are so cool…..” I was broken. Thank God for the Grace of my Mother I only went to one HS reunion - 5 years (after college) “Jen” Raced to me, I was not sure who she was…. She was divorced, two children and the “wear on her face” 26 year old should not be so profoundly evident I thought I would feel triumphant, I just felt sad. Bullies shame and must live with themselves Kindness and support does not cost a thing And no, it is irrelevant to me what has happened to her, it is her path. I am a lucky woman and have my bridges as we all do and yes, some wounds do make you stronger.
I was popular I was a nerd. I got along with EVERYONE. I didn't bother to go to 10 or 20 cause why???? I didn't talk to those people while I was in school I was too busy trying to get out of school. I did extra curriculars like step team cheerleading and modeling but I wouldn't consider the other people in those clubs friends.
I can't imagine going to a reunion.... I talk to maybe two people I graduated with regularly. One of them because we ended up at the same college, and the other because she was my best friend then and we still vent about stupid people and send cute animal videos to one another. But I honestly cannot see myself going to see the former honors kids who are now struggling for normalcy, the Chick-fil-A employees, and the couple who had a kid less than six months after graduation. Thanks, but no thanks, I'm doing just fine without them.
Next year it will be 40 years since I left school. I don't remember many of the people there and have never even considered wanting to get in contact with them. School was awful. I was quiet, withdrawn and relentlessly bullied. I don't understand why anyone would want to get together with these people.
I dropped out so I will never have the chance to debate go or not go
I have no interest in going to any of my HS reunions. We didn't even have one for our 10 years unless I just didn't know about it. Next year will be 15, so we'll see. The only people I actually want to see and talk to from HS are people I'm already in contact with and still friends with from HS. So, no thanks. I thought I was the odd one out with this attitude, I'm really glad to see this seems to be the common viewpoint.
I responded to some of these but gave up after halfway. Just too depressing.
Went to my 10 yr. Was bullied and harassed thru hs. All the popular pretty girls were now housewives (which is ok) looks gone. I had blossomed and they were still trying to harass me with comments to each other. Quarterback comes mentions he didn't think graduated since he didn't see much my sr yr. I was taking classes at local Jr college. 30 yrs homecoming including 3 yrs of graduates. My bff and I go )(we're a yr apart) he drops me at the door and I start hearing comments again trying to make fun of me once again. It stopped fast when I started getting attention from all the men including married ones. Nothing about me really changed but my self esteem and not giving a c**p about his idiots.y bff and I decided were not going back to any reunions. Those popular girls are probably divorced and trying to get men in tinder. I get asked out by men 30 yrs younger just by being myself. Ive been divorced since 1995. And I'm almost 63
I went to my 10 year reunion at the informal "get together" at a local bar. I would say that while cliques still largely gravitated towards one another, there was a lot of mixing going on. FB became popular only a few years after we graduated and while I did maintain a lot of friendships from HS, mere acquaintances became friends after. I think that made a huge difference on how we interacted at the reunion. Instead of my normal friend group from HS, there were many people from outside the group that joined, and we would all break off and join other groups. There was no drama, put downs, one-upping. We were all generally happy to see each other and no one felt left out or alone. I'm sad that I missed my 20th. I got back home from vaca the same night as the reunion, and had many messages the next day from most of my graduating class about how much I was missed. It was a nice feeling. I wasn't "popular" but I also wasn't disliked by most.
I absolutely hated high-school. Did not graduate. I have only spoken to a few friends from back then. Since I got rid of FB, I only speak to 1 friend now. I found a few on Classmates, one decided to play games because he thought I laughed at him when we were teenagers. (I didn't) Some people never move on. The one friend that I still talk to, asked me last year if I got my invite for the upcoming reunion, I said,"Nope, I didn't graduate, remember?"
