Sometimes, the line between life and death is so thin, luck is people’s only friend survival-wise. It doesn’t really help if said person also tends to make poor choices in life, but there is also a point where people start thinking they just naturally draw misfortune, but I digress.
And, sometimes, people share these stories in a viral Reddit thread asking people to share the stupidest ways they almost kicked the bucket, whether it’s stupid because of their own choices, or stupid because the circumstances and the chain of events were caused by stupidity.
Speaking of which, there’s a Reddit thread where people are sharing stories of how they almost died, all thanks to varying degrees of stupidity. It got 41,200 upvotes and people’s engagement went over 18,500 comments.
Bored Panda collected the best stories and responses and made a curated list for y’all, so scroll down and enjoy. Oh, and don’t forget to comment and all that jazz.
More Info: Reddit
This post may include affiliate links.
Went to go visit a friend in Gloucester Mass in winter back in high school far from my home. I was planning on staying overnight at their house but their mother who I now know has mental health problems wouldn’t even let me in the house because the father "wasn’t home" working a night shift. Friend said sorry bro and closed the door. Almost froze to death waiting outside in 10 degree F at night. A cab driver saw me slumped on a bench and woke me up. Let me get warm and drive around in the passenger seat while he picked up drunk people out on the town all night. When he finished his shift he dropped me off at the train station and handed me 7 bucks for the fare. Dude probably saved my life and I can’t even remember his name.
I walked into a back room freezer of a grocery store. The huge door was designed to close automatically. I knew this and went in and did what I was there to do. After 30 seconds, I couldn’t catch my breath. I thought maybe I was just working to hard so I stopped and took several huge breaths, nothing. I felt like I was drowning out of water. I had to move as quickly as I could back outside of the freezer and feel to my knees gasping when I got out. It was only afterwards I realized for some dumb reason someone kept open dry ice in a cart inside of the freezer.
Dry ice removes oxygen out of the air in enclosed spaces. I almost died from lack of oxygen and would have been an icicle when they found me.
Don’t f**k with dry ice.
At first, I was thinking that the freezer was airtight for some strange reason
Being sleepy on the road. Don't. Find a spot and sleep a bit.
Seriously, it happened to me twice. You think you won't fall asleep, but you will.
I have blacked out while driving tired before. Don't do it. You seriously may not remember falling asleep, it's terrifying.
Went to Grand Canyon and tried to be funny and acted like I was gonna slip,[it was snowing], and ended up almost really slipping and falling. Some random guy scolded me like a little kid because he got more scared than me.
bruh once I saw a woman sitting on the edge of a cliff, like a bruh I was scared AF, how can people be that riskyyyy??
Waited too long to go to the hospital (pre-Covid) I thought I just had a cold. Husband said, go to the doctor. I said no. Three days later, still not great. Husband said, go to urgent care. I said I will if I don't feel better tomorrow. Next day, I tell husband, I need to go to the ER. A collapsed lung due to pneumonia.Three days in hospital plus breathing issues for the next year. Moral: Listen to your spouse. And yeah, got a whole lot of "I told you so"s. Deserved every one of them.
I know sometimes I don't want to go for help because I'm afraid of how they might react. There's been times I went in for a massive migraine I had for 3 days it was making me throw up in the emergency room doctor made me feel like crap. He said I have an emergency coming in from an automobile crash and you want me to pay attention to your migraine? It sucks I've had a couple stories like that so I tend to not want to go for help when I might really need it. That doctor didn't do anything for me and eventually the headache got better but it could have been a brain aneurysm or anything.
Severe migraines (especially if it's worse than usual) can be really scary. You question how you can be in so much pain without it being life threatening
Load More Replies...
Friend recently passed after refusing to go to the doctor, urgent care, ER. Her husband begged her to go an finally physically made her go. She was to weak to fight. Died three days later.
I'm sorry that happened, must be hard for her husband to think that if she'd gone sooner, the outcome could have been different
Load More Replies...
My Mum was like that. UK so no medical costs. She had been feeling bad for a while but resisted going to the Dr. Eventually we persuaded her to let the nurse visit. On the day of the visit Mum had a nap on the sofa. She died in her sleep. It turned out that she had pneumonia. The coroner called it the silent killer. In most cases it doesn't even present with coughs etc. She had a bad back a week previously which apparently can be a symptom. She also had shortness of breath but as she had COPD this didn't unduly alarm anyone. It was early stage COPD, she didn't need oxygen therapy.
The long wait, the noise, bad news, the sick & injured looking like death in the crowded lobby.
I had a terrible pain in my gut that would come and go, I thought I was maybe getting an ulcer (based on seeing characters on TV necking pepto bismol for ulcers). Then one day as I finished work I felt as if someone just sliced my belly open, the pain was excruciating but lessened after a couple of minutes so I went home to bed, still in pain, I quickly developed a high temperature, I decided I would have to go to the doctor next day if I didn't feel any better. Now I'm thinking it might be appendicitis, next day no improvement so I go to the doctor, who sent me immediately to the hospital, a couple of hours later after my blood results came back I was given emergency colostomy surgery to save my life. Turned out I had had an undiagnosed intestinal condition and the excruciating pain the day before had been my intestine tearing open, I was hours from death.
This was my experience. Everyone else, got better after 5 days, but by day 12 I had not slept or eaten in three nights, with diabetic sugar in the 400's, while my period never ended. It was my low oxygen (80-90) that convinced me finally go to hospital. Three days on oxygen and lost my hair 3 months later.Thankful I could get onto Medicaid and only saw a few bills before they took over.
My wife thought she had a bad cold but ignored it for a couple of weeks, it was pneumonia which left untreated had caused sepsis too, both her lungs collapsed and she was in ICU for a week, the first day she had to be revived with adrenaline twice. The consultant had told us to pray for her because they didn't expect her to make it. Ever since then I keep hearing about people dying with pneumonia and sepsis. Please people, if you have a cold that doesn't want to shift, see a doctor, cheat the mortician.
Woah. It's terrible to face fees that size. My colleague had a triple heart bypass which if it had happened in the country his family came from (1 generation ago) would've bankrupted the entire family several timesover. Because he was a UK citizen it didn't cost him a penny
Load More Replies...
Spent my 9th bday in the hospital with mono. Slept for a little over 2 straight weeks. I have absolutely no memory of that time (other than my mom asking me to eat potatoes because I needed something). Grandma kept saying no, its a cold, ill be fine. Finally my grandpa (hard as nails Vietnam vet says "we ARE taking him in. If he dies, we're getting divorced" (or so my mom tells me). So we go. Doc says another day, MAYBE 2, and I wouldn't have survived. Spent 3 days in on fluids, still sleeping. Was discharged on day 4. Recovered enough to sit up and eat. Took me another week to get the strength to actually step outside again. Dont ignore illness. Its fatal more than you know.
Pneumonia is no joke. I've never had it, but my mom did when I was in elementary school. My mom was a hard-working single mom who at one point worked 5 jobs to keep us going, but for that week, she did NOTHING. It's the only time in my life I can ever remember her doing literally nothing but stay in bed and rest.
Lost my Aunt just in a situation like this, one day she was feeling strong, in the other ER and never came back...
My mom said to tell her if and when I felt suicidal, so she'd be able to take me to the ER. But the last time I felt that way, it was because we were both having a really bad day and she had been yelling at me for most of it (I couldn't find the willpower to shower, do homework, get out of bed, etc. So she had to physically stand behind me and force me to do so). I didn't want to tell her for fear she'd think I was faking to make her feel bad for yelling at me, so I stayed quiet despite literally laying on my bed planning my death for most of that day. I brought it up the next day when we went to the doctor for a followup made a month or so prior. She admitted to me that yes, if I had told her she would have thought I was faking, but she would've taken me to the ER anyway. And she'd probably bring my schoolwork so I wouldn't skip if it was just a prank.
My husband, stubborn man, wouldn't go to the hospital with a sinus problem. Wound up in intensive care for almost a week with a bad infection. Frankly it ruined his health for a long time after that, too. At least I got a week of sleep after that, which I desperately needed.
Me too. I had 40 (105) temperature for a couple of days and was starting to get goofy so my daughter called the ambulance and I was admitted for pneumonia and had a hospital stay of 3 weeks. I didn't think I had trouble breathing so pneumonia never crossed my mind. Now, I have to be extra careful because once you get it, you are more likely to get it again, even after receiving the vaccine. Thank heavens I live in Japan were health insurance covered most of the charges and the ambulance was free!
Last year one weekend I started having minor respiratory symptoms that only lasted a day or two. Then my stomach started acting up real bad. I knew I had to get Covid tested and I was feeling well enough to leave the house so I called and set up the appointment. Literally a few hours later I got so weak I could barely stand up. It came on all of a sudden, no warning. I waited a few more days, being stupid. Then started thinking I was dehydrated and I was getting low on water. The tap here will make very sick within minutes so I couldn't drink that. I went to the hospital thinking I'll get some fluids and come. They tested me there and it came back negative. They did xrays that showed double double pneumonia. They kept watching my oxygen and it kept dropping. I had no respiratory symptoms at all. They said noone gets that sick that fast so they started treating me for covid. I was admitted and they retested me and it came back positive. I was in the hospital, on oxygen, for 10 days.
Then I was transferred to a rehab facility to get my strength back. I was there for a month and a half. I wish I had someone to make me go to the hospital sooner. A couple months later I got allergy symptoms that caused my asthma to act up. Guess what. It was round 2. Thankfully it was no where near as bad as the first time. No hospital visit. Doctor called in medicine and I was fine in a couple days. Did most of the quarantine watching TV. Sometimes you can self-diagnose but you have to be careful. I found that out the hard way. I try not to do that anymore.
Load More Replies...
This happened to me. Thought it was a relapse of the flu that I had the week before. Finally got so mad that my husband wouldn't just let me sleep it off that I got my daughter to take me to the hospital. I didn't even want him to go with me. Had to apologize profusely when I was finally released from the hospital 5 days later because my kidneys had failed.
Absolutely. And, with COVID, if it doesn't take your life, it can cost you hundreds of thousands in medical bills from the ICU or lifelong bills from long-term heart/lung damage. Now, compare that to getting a vaccine--which is free.
I snorkelled too far out into the ocean, and it wasn't because it was a riptide, I just got distracted by pretty fish
Stuck my head out the car window bc I wanted to see why dogs loved it. My grandpa didnt notice, rolled up the window, and I choked. He freaked out when he heard the cat like noises (ironic) I was making while my neck was trying to squeeze through the small opening of the window, but kept raising the window in his panic. Eventually he got it and I was left with a red mark on my neck and no closer to understanding dogs.
My grandpa passed earlier this year so its a nice way to remember him and I know he' get a chuckle to know people found it funny.
it was meant to be funny so dont feel bad for laughing. My lil sis was in the seat next to me when this happened and she was laughing too, funny then, funny now.
OMG this happened way back in 2011 to me, I came from a picnic with my friend rolled up to say goodbye to them from the car, AND GOSH I thought I would be dead as my father started rolling up the window, FREKIN choking, thank god I'm still alive
I was in 2nd or 3rd grade, I was getting off the school bus and was walking around to the other side to my driveway. Suddenly the bus driver hits the horn, scared the hell out of me and I stopped at the edge of the front of a bus and a dump truck good speeding around. I dunno if the dump truck driver didn't see the lights of the bus or whatever but that driver made a dumb mistake that could have cost me my life. Thinking about it my older sister was up at our driveway waiting for me, probably would have messed her up for life
After that the school district changed bus routes to avoid students having to cross the road to get on or off the bus
Glad the bus driver was paying attention to the traffic! And hopefully reported the dump truck!!
I almost drowned in the sea as a kid. A current pushed me away from the shore. Lifeguards saved me and were slapping my face. I thought it was a punishment but they were resuscitating me.
I commented on a controversial post on reddit
we've been there done that, PS who agrees this should be higher?
Started hiccuping with peanut butter in my mouth. Peanut butter went down the wrong tube, I started choking, but couldn’t cough bc these hiccups wouldn’t f**king stop. Finally leaned over and managed to cough it out, but it was a close call
While drunk, I sat down outside...to rest for a moment...on a freezing cold Winter's night. Fortunately, a passerby noticed me and encouraged me to get inside. I figure I was probably there dozing for several minutes.
Taking apart a dryer completely to clean it out and get it running smoothly again, dropped a screwdriver onto an exposed wire… huge arc and zap sound. I had left it plugged in (up until I realized the incredibly smooth-brained move I had pulled)
Smoked cigarettes for 23 years. Had a heart attack at 39. Pretty f**kin' stupid if you ask me.
I started smoking cigarettes at 16 to cover up the smell of the pot I was also smoking. I didn't want my parents to find out about the pot. I didn't care about the cigarettes. I had a close friend who smoked. I could pass the smell off as being near him. I still smoke cigarettes, don't smoke pot anymore. I've tried a couple times to quit, but then some douchebag at work, or in public in general does something beyond my tolerance level. Cigarettes are cheaper than murder.
I'm Italian but have been living in the UK for two years
Guess who looked at the wrong side of the road while a Bus was coming trough?
Everytime I went back to Italy I risked my life for the same reason by getting used to drive to the left and viceversa
Swam under a shipyard pier at night (solid concrete above me) and lost my sense of direction. Got lucky and found my way out.
To add more detail - A friend and I were "assault swimmers" attacking a ship for a training exercise at night. We would swim from pier pylon to pylon underwater. Take a breath, go under, push off, and swim ~20' to the next pylon, surface and repeat. My mask broke and I was doing it with my eyes closed due to having contacts at the time. One time I just kept swimming and felt like I missed the pylon. When I went to slowly broach the surface I found myself under the concrete above. I had no idea the pier was even built like that. Put my hands up and oriented myself. It looked dark in all directions but my gut told me to the right is where I came from. After that, I stayed on the surface! Cheers!
I stuck my head in a random beaker to sniff something in chem lab, I have been very good about wafting since
Came very close (about two inches) to backing into a warehouse rack full of two ton coils of sheet metal when I didn't realise that my forklift was in reverse.
Literally today, getting undressed to shower and as my pants fell to my ankles I went to step out of them and tripped, almost walloped my head on the sink
When I was little I was flipping my hair over to wrap it in an towel and bashed my forehead on the sink
Unplugging the washing machine with wet hands. My hand slipped onto the prongs while they were still partially in the outlet, and I think my heart stopped for a second before I yanked the plug free. Definitely do not recommend.
I was removing a dishwasher at the grandparents house when they were about to move in with my folks, had flipped the labeled breaker, and was trying to be careful of wires, but it's a dishwasher so there was water. Figured out I had not managed to turn off the power correctly when the whole right side of my body went tense and tingly. After that, we shut off power to the whole house until the job was done.
Drove on an interstate during a hurricane and watched all the cars around me get submerged
Dumb like me... Drove home thru a major storm, going "Wow! Why's it so dark at 2.30? Look at that tree that fell on that roof... One tree on top of that car... Those signs rolling down the street... Another tree & roof combo. No street or traffic lights working." When l got home, turned on the news, it was a 🌪️that came thru just minutes before me.
Grown adult and choked on mozzarella cheese. Was only alone for 20 minutes. Can't imagine the obituary
Fell through the ice. The great lakes freeze partially in the winter. Far out there was an ice ridge, and on the other side was this clear glassy ice as far out as I could see. I climbed over the ridge to take a leak in privacy, but it wasn't solid. Went through. Wife had to put down our first infant son to fish me out.
I was very small (probably around 5) and when my mum wasn’t looking I tied some clothes around my neck and hooked it to the stair railings, then tried to jump off the railings to see if they would hold me. Fortunately I was too small to climb over the railings and my mum found me before I would’ve jumped.
bruh if he died what would the cops think, do u think they would believe the mother?
Yelling at someone in the hood, they tried to run me over with their car and then got out and chased me
I don’t know if it’s Covid but you should just assume everyone is having a bad day and they are all armed.
Choked on a small potato at the Pizza Hut salad bar. Completely lodged in my throat. I raced to the loo and shoved my fingers down my throat, and it popped out. Walked back to my table and finished my salad. I was with my boyfriend. He did nothing. I grabbed the waitress’s arm. All she did was say “is she okay?” to my boyfriend. Hence running to the loo to deal with it myself!!
Choked on a life saver
No the hole In the center is not for breathing. Life Savers have holes in them because the inventor, Clarence Crace wanted to create a unique candy. Back in 1912 (109 years ago)
Only 18 pieces in a Lifesaver Storybook?! That's a paragraph, not a story. They originally contained 10 full rolls, each roll a different variety, 10 pieces per roll.
Choked on a hamburger in 8th grade beside my old friend who was too busy flirting until someone else saved me
Almost got my head squashed by a car due to a small pebble making me fall on the main road
I let my anger get the best of me and DID NOT hold the piece of wood against the mitre saw wall. (For those that don't know if you don't do that it will without fail take the wood and catch it on one of the blade parts sending you into it with the wood)
Climbed into one of those power supply units, that supply power to the whole road, whilst retrieving a ball.
Friend of the family managed to grab a high voltage line while trimming a tree, fortunately hitting the ground apparently restarted his heart. I would say he's fine several decades later but I have heard him pun before he was even awake enough to open his eyes, so the jury is still out.
I already said it up there but if you choke do NOT run into the bathroom. People who choke to death are often found in bathrooms because their instinct was to run to the bathroom and deal with it themselves. Stand up and try to indicate whats happening so somebody can perform the Heimlich on you!
I choked on a piece of steak, good thing thing my wife Heimliched me. She still seems to think I owe her something.
I almost got my face blasted off today by a bunch of boys playing cricket. They threw the ball so hard that I could hear the air being pushed as the ball missed me by a few millimetres
My dad cracked it at a group of boys when he was dropping me off at school once and I was really embarrassed until I realised it was because they had thrown a ball and it hit his head, almost directly on his temple.
Load More Replies...
Think I came pretty close this morning when I woke up, slapped my missus' a**e, and said 'good morning...now get up and serve me some breakfast wench'.
My close call... I slipped and fell on a Friday leaving work, tearing my quadricep. Went home on crutches to put my leg up for a few days. On Sunday I had a "shortness of breath" issue that I blamed on the pain meds. Felt worse every day, finally passing out Wednesday. Went to the ER with pulmonary embolisms and spent 8 days in the hospital. Who knew?
Hrm. As I have said before, I have more than one bonehead thing I have done that could have ended badly but didn't. I think probably the worst though was when I was driving a (fully loaded) city bus when I noticed that the power steering was not working as well. Called it in and was told to keep driving, which was, in retrospect, stupid and I should have refused (I could have). Oh, and the important detail: this was a commuter route, and while this happened on surface streets I was a few blocks from getting on the interstate. It ended up dumping enough fluid for the power steering to fail catastrophically right as I was making the turn onto the probably busiest surface street in the city. Making the turn, mind you, so I didn't get through the intersection until I spent about five light cycles using all my strength to turn the wheel and pull the bus over to the side of the rode. If I had actually gotten on the highway and been going more than a few miles an hour when things failed... Oo
Weird double post: when I upvoted 1, the other also got my upvote. When I deleted my upvote from 2, it didn't change 1. Weird.
Load More Replies...
When I was ten I was throwing rocks off of a hundred foot tall granite cliffs into some rapids below, and when I picked up a rock I was startled by a small, sleeping rattlesnake under it. I leapt back and almost went over the cliff. And then I poked at the rattlesnake with a stick until it woke up and struck at the stick. Some city kids shouldn’t be let out into the woods.
Not me but my younger brother, back when he was about 8 or 9. We were exploring near a cave at the coast around low tide and he wanted to go in. We didn't have a watch with us (and this was many years before cell phones), so we didn't know how long we had 'til the tide started coming back in. Turns out the tide was already coming back in, and fast! He almost got himself stuck in that little cave and swept out with the current, but my older brother fortunately was there to pick him up and carry him back to safety through already-knee-high waves.
The moral of this post: "Why is everyone else so bad at eating?" --Ron Swanson
I can share my King of Stupidity moment as it happened when I was really young... The kind of age those warning labels are referring to when they say "KEEP OUT OF REACH OF SMALL CHILDREN." That's important to the story... I wanted to clean my penny collection... So I made a mixture of bleach, kerosene, model airplane fuel, laundry detergent, and PEROXIDE! Chemists out there are already wondering how I didn’t blow myself up… I shook the mixture and then inhaled it… I’d be dead if I didn’t grow up 2-minutes from a hospital with an amazing emergency room… When I got home from the ER my penny collection had literally DISSOLVED.
Was walking to school in winter once and decided to take a short cut. went the wrong way, ended up on this kind of little hill thing beside a busy street. Figured i could safely walk down the hill and wait for a break in the traffic, but it turned out that the hill was all ice with a thin layer of snow over it. zoomed down headed right for the cars. Fell on my butt and barely managed to stop before ending up in the street. Had to sit there for a few mins to let my heart come back to some kind of normal.
Years ago I was free climbing (no ropes, just your hands and feet) a 75ish ft cliff near me at an old abandoned rock quarry. I was about half way and had to sneeze, my mom taught me to cover my mouth. So I let go of the rock I was clinging to to cover my nose and mouth. 🤦♀️ Did a lot of weird flapping of my arms and slid/fell down a few feet before I could catch a hold. Scraped my legs and stomach up real good. But if I didn't catch myself and fell all the way down I definitely would have been hospitalized if not dead.
I was driving on a major highway with my teenaged granddaughter, eating McDonald's, and we started laughing hard at something totally stupid. I ended up inhaling a piece of the bun, and that made me laugh harder. I continued to choke and laugh harder and harder, hyper-focusing on the road so I wouldn't get us both killed. Thank God the bun eventually dissolved enough and I could breathe. Scary and still funny after all this time.
I block my nose when I sneeze, and I have accepted that I may get a brain aneurysm and die. I think that’s the stupidest and funniest way to go, so I’m not mad about it.
Lots of people choke it seems...and not many people notice they are choking
I almost ran in front of a car because my brain suddenly decided that red means I can go and green for the cars means they have to stop. I have no idea why that happened, but, Christ, I certaily was awake after that shock. terrifying brain fart!!
When I was a teen my dad came home from work with an old empty oil drum. He got it so we could burn some old rubbish in it as we were having a clear out. My mum dad and I were taking turns putting bags of rubbish in the fire. Mum put a bag in and walked away Just as I was about to put a bag in, when there was an almighty explosion. I was just far enough away not to get hurt but what bits came flying out and burnt the grass around the drum. My mother had put a bag that was full of old dead batteries that dad was keeping to one side to take to work to dispose of properly but mum didn't realise as they were in a black bag. If I had been any closer I would have been showered with fiery battery acid and been badly burned just like the grass.
I already said it up there but if you choke do NOT run into the bathroom. People who choke to death are often found in bathrooms because their instinct was to run to the bathroom and deal with it themselves. Stand up and try to indicate whats happening so somebody can perform the Heimlich on you!
I choked on a piece of steak, good thing thing my wife Heimliched me. She still seems to think I owe her something.
I almost got my face blasted off today by a bunch of boys playing cricket. They threw the ball so hard that I could hear the air being pushed as the ball missed me by a few millimetres
My dad cracked it at a group of boys when he was dropping me off at school once and I was really embarrassed until I realised it was because they had thrown a ball and it hit his head, almost directly on his temple.
Load More Replies... Think I came pretty close this morning when I woke up, slapped my missus' a**e, and said 'good morning...now get up and serve me some breakfast wench'.
My close call... I slipped and fell on a Friday leaving work, tearing my quadricep. Went home on crutches to put my leg up for a few days. On Sunday I had a "shortness of breath" issue that I blamed on the pain meds. Felt worse every day, finally passing out Wednesday. Went to the ER with pulmonary embolisms and spent 8 days in the hospital. Who knew?
Hrm. As I have said before, I have more than one bonehead thing I have done that could have ended badly but didn't. I think probably the worst though was when I was driving a (fully loaded) city bus when I noticed that the power steering was not working as well. Called it in and was told to keep driving, which was, in retrospect, stupid and I should have refused (I could have). Oh, and the important detail: this was a commuter route, and while this happened on surface streets I was a few blocks from getting on the interstate. It ended up dumping enough fluid for the power steering to fail catastrophically right as I was making the turn onto the probably busiest surface street in the city. Making the turn, mind you, so I didn't get through the intersection until I spent about five light cycles using all my strength to turn the wheel and pull the bus over to the side of the rode. If I had actually gotten on the highway and been going more than a few miles an hour when things failed... Oo
Weird double post: when I upvoted 1, the other also got my upvote. When I deleted my upvote from 2, it didn't change 1. Weird.
Load More Replies... When I was ten I was throwing rocks off of a hundred foot tall granite cliffs into some rapids below, and when I picked up a rock I was startled by a small, sleeping rattlesnake under it. I leapt back and almost went over the cliff. And then I poked at the rattlesnake with a stick until it woke up and struck at the stick. Some city kids shouldn’t be let out into the woods.
Not me but my younger brother, back when he was about 8 or 9. We were exploring near a cave at the coast around low tide and he wanted to go in. We didn't have a watch with us (and this was many years before cell phones), so we didn't know how long we had 'til the tide started coming back in. Turns out the tide was already coming back in, and fast! He almost got himself stuck in that little cave and swept out with the current, but my older brother fortunately was there to pick him up and carry him back to safety through already-knee-high waves.
The moral of this post: "Why is everyone else so bad at eating?" --Ron Swanson
I can share my King of Stupidity moment as it happened when I was really young... The kind of age those warning labels are referring to when they say "KEEP OUT OF REACH OF SMALL CHILDREN." That's important to the story... I wanted to clean my penny collection... So I made a mixture of bleach, kerosene, model airplane fuel, laundry detergent, and PEROXIDE! Chemists out there are already wondering how I didn’t blow myself up… I shook the mixture and then inhaled it… I’d be dead if I didn’t grow up 2-minutes from a hospital with an amazing emergency room… When I got home from the ER my penny collection had literally DISSOLVED.
Was walking to school in winter once and decided to take a short cut. went the wrong way, ended up on this kind of little hill thing beside a busy street. Figured i could safely walk down the hill and wait for a break in the traffic, but it turned out that the hill was all ice with a thin layer of snow over it. zoomed down headed right for the cars. Fell on my butt and barely managed to stop before ending up in the street. Had to sit there for a few mins to let my heart come back to some kind of normal.
Years ago I was free climbing (no ropes, just your hands and feet) a 75ish ft cliff near me at an old abandoned rock quarry. I was about half way and had to sneeze, my mom taught me to cover my mouth. So I let go of the rock I was clinging to to cover my nose and mouth. 🤦♀️ Did a lot of weird flapping of my arms and slid/fell down a few feet before I could catch a hold. Scraped my legs and stomach up real good. But if I didn't catch myself and fell all the way down I definitely would have been hospitalized if not dead.
I was driving on a major highway with my teenaged granddaughter, eating McDonald's, and we started laughing hard at something totally stupid. I ended up inhaling a piece of the bun, and that made me laugh harder. I continued to choke and laugh harder and harder, hyper-focusing on the road so I wouldn't get us both killed. Thank God the bun eventually dissolved enough and I could breathe. Scary and still funny after all this time.
I block my nose when I sneeze, and I have accepted that I may get a brain aneurysm and die. I think that’s the stupidest and funniest way to go, so I’m not mad about it.
Lots of people choke it seems...and not many people notice they are choking
I almost ran in front of a car because my brain suddenly decided that red means I can go and green for the cars means they have to stop. I have no idea why that happened, but, Christ, I certaily was awake after that shock. terrifying brain fart!!
When I was a teen my dad came home from work with an old empty oil drum. He got it so we could burn some old rubbish in it as we were having a clear out. My mum dad and I were taking turns putting bags of rubbish in the fire. Mum put a bag in and walked away Just as I was about to put a bag in, when there was an almighty explosion. I was just far enough away not to get hurt but what bits came flying out and burnt the grass around the drum. My mother had put a bag that was full of old dead batteries that dad was keeping to one side to take to work to dispose of properly but mum didn't realise as they were in a black bag. If I had been any closer I would have been showered with fiery battery acid and been badly burned just like the grass.
