Woman Asks If She’s A Jerk For Not Punishing Her Daughter Because Of How She Rejected Another Kid
Rejection is always harsh. I mean, you muster up all of your courage to tell someone special what you really think about them and get shut down. No one likes that.
The big difference is that some people can handle rejection, but others really don’t fare well. There’s only one good way to react to “no”, though. Yep, this one has an objective answer.
Once you hear those two syllables, you should really just walk off, tail tucked between your legs or not. But as the saying goes, some people really can’t take “no” for an answer.
More info: Reddit
Sometimes kids don’t really know how rejection works so they keep trying after getting that initial “no”
Image credits: Mai Anh (not the actual photo)
A mom took it online to be judged whether she was a jerk for not disciplining her daughter after hearing her harsh rejection of a fellow teen
Image credits: SalamanderSome9698
Image credits: Taryn Elliott (not the actual photo)
Her daughter is fed up and tired of fielding attention from guys all the time and them turning on her after she rejects them
Image credits: SalamanderSome9698
Image credits: KAMAL IG (not the actual photo)
After the 4th time the same guy had asked her out, the 12 y.o. girl harshly told him leave her alone, slipping a “freak” in there
Image credits: SalamanderSome9698
She started getting calls from other people saying that she needs to teach her daughter tolerance and punish her, but the mom refused to do so
Highschool crushes are a dime a dozen. I mean, at the time, they feel like the most important thing in the world, with teens practically being ready for the wedding a day after they hit it off with someone.
But hindsight is 20/20 and now we’ve got the privilege of knowing that those relationships usually have the same lasting time as left out milk.
Without this vital knowledge, teens overreact to every single potential relationship. Okay, maybe I’m being too harsh, not every single one, but we both know that proportions are more than overblown. It makes teens fret about pretty much every single thing they can control about themselves and even some that they really shouldn’t be trying to control.
It’s a lot of kids pretending to be things, wanting to be “cooler” than they think they are, more attractive, funnier and all of that stuff. I believe that the whole “be yourself” stems from that period, when kids will do anything just to make it with a girl. As time goes on they mellow out, find their own niche, and can feel better in their own skin.
A quick aside – “be yourself” is not really good advice. I know you’ve probably heard it so many times that it feels like you’re being beaten over the head with it, but I don’t mean that it’s bad advice because it’s an empty platitude.
It’s bad advice because “yourself” could be prejudiced, rude, condescending, elitist, someone who will not accept rejection, and so on… Be your best self! Work on yourself, develop your hobbies, and look for a partner because you want to love and be loved, not because you don’t have anything better to do and feel bad around your pals without one.
Image credits: Polina Tankilevitch (not the actual photo)
Going back to the whole rejection thing in today’s story. Was the girl’s response harsh? Yeah, it was, but the real question is whether it was unjustified.
Remembering myself as a teen, I certainly didn’t have the most patience for people. Especially not bullies and anything related to them. Now while she was bullied by another group of kids, you could see how the constant hitting on and just wanting to be left in peace would make you feel.
So you explode at the person annoying you to no end, because you know that talking to them one on one has ceased working.
The worst part is that the school decided to perk up only after finding out what happened, considering the boy a victim. The mom shares in the comments that it’s gotten so bad at schools where she lives that she’s been considering moving, hoping that wherever they go, school policies will be more egalitarian in their punishments.
I understand it may seem too harsh, especially when sources say that autistic people may struggle far more with these feelings, but the teen shouldn’t feel obligated to date or be nice to anyone with any disorder, especially if they’re inconsiderate to their feelings.
This whole story shows how important it is to teach your kids boundaries and how to take rejection. Since we’ve seemingly got that boundary part down pat in this story, let’s talk about rejection.
Mashable talks about teaching empathy for a start, for example, by asking them how they would feel if they had to play with someone they didn’t like – same goes for dating.
Another thing is teaching them that everyone experiences rejection. You should show your children that despite being rejected by someone, they’re still valuable. Sharing your own experiences is a viable way to go here.
Finally, if kids get used to more difficult topics such as rejection and boundaries while they’re young, they’ll be more likely to broach difficult topics with you in the future and that kind of openness between kids and parents is truly a thing to behold.
The poster’s story collected over 13k upvotes and over 3.3k comments, the community judged neither the mom, nor the teen to be jerks.
Share your own stories of rejection and how you dealt with it in the comments below!
Even though her community disagrees, the AITA community firmly believes that neither she, neither her daughters are jerks
46Kviews
Share on Facebook
Had the girl called him a name because she was just being a bully herself then yes, she would've been dead wrong. But after he harassed her 4 times he had whatever she said coming to him. You don't get to ignore my repeated requests to be left alone and expect me to be civil towards you and I'm an adult!
He doesn't understand social cues, and norms. That gets him sympathy. But she must also protect herself from someone who is overstepping her boundaries, if that means he is upset, then that's sad but necessary for him to understand boundaries, and her to protect herself.
Load More Replies...
The issue here has nothing to do with autism, it's the fact that this guy harassed her. On a separate note, wtf is that stock image
That stock image is seriously creeping me out.
Load More Replies...
Women\girls should not be punished for not putting up with stalkers. Autism or any other disability is not an excuse for disrespecting others. Somebody needs to slap some send into the parents and teachers. When it gets to the point that you need to use a slur to make a point, society failed, period.
Had the girl called him a name because she was just being a bully herself then yes, she would've been dead wrong. But after he harassed her 4 times he had whatever she said coming to him. You don't get to ignore my repeated requests to be left alone and expect me to be civil towards you and I'm an adult!
He doesn't understand social cues, and norms. That gets him sympathy. But she must also protect herself from someone who is overstepping her boundaries, if that means he is upset, then that's sad but necessary for him to understand boundaries, and her to protect herself.
Load More Replies... The issue here has nothing to do with autism, it's the fact that this guy harassed her. On a separate note, wtf is that stock image
That stock image is seriously creeping me out.
Load More Replies... Women\girls should not be punished for not putting up with stalkers. Autism or any other disability is not an excuse for disrespecting others. Somebody needs to slap some send into the parents and teachers. When it gets to the point that you need to use a slur to make a point, society failed, period.
73
84