Bride Suggests Postponing Her Wedding Because Of Fiancé’s Braces, He Says They Should Cancel It Altogether
Recently, a confused woman turned to the AITA community on Reddit for a moral judgement.
The author who goes by the name SlightRow3100 explained that her 25-year-old fiance is in braces. “He refused to get them when he was a child/teen cause he feared people would make fun of him, but he finally accepted to get them,” she explained.
Turns out, the couple’s wedding is coming soon, but now the author has doubts if it’s the right time. “The issue is that our wedding was supposed to be coming up soon, but now I plan to postpone till my fiance gets rid of his braces,” she wrote, wondering if it’s a reasonable decision.
Read on for the full story below, and be sure to share your thoughts in the comments section.
Woman wonders if she’s wrong to postpone her wedding until her fiance gets his braces removed
Image credits: Elisall (not the actual photo)
Image credits: nd3000 (not the actual photo)
Image credits: SlightRow3100
Many people thought that the author is wrong in this sitution
More people shared other opinions
A few people are saying NTA. You're completely missing the point. She devalued her husband and his feelings. YTA 100% lady.
I can't believe people are saying NTA. Especially after he told her how insecure he was about braces.
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Yep. Neither braces or even wanting to postpone (even if reason is silly) is a big deal. She wants it to be 'perfect' and there is no such thing. When people get bogged down with perfection they'll find other things wrong on the day. All sorts of things can go awry - best to just roll with it and not mind!
Load More Replies... This request could have a silver lining for the fiancé: he could take the opportunity to avoid marrying this woman altogether.
I had braces and headgear/retainers (google “orthodontic headgear 1980s” for an idea, it was abominable and went over your entire head) for most of my childhood. The teasing and bullying was relentless. It was horrible. Once I became an adult, I’d figured those kids who mocked and bullied me had grown up as well. Apparently, they don’t all grow up. OP is one of the latter.
Gosh, I had to wear it too. Dentist was smart enough to suggest I wear it at night. It was awful and, guess what? My front teeth are crooked anyway.
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I can't recall seeing wedding photos where a groom would wear braces either. You know why? Because there is nothing unusual about having braces on your teeth, so it doesn't immediately catch your attention when you see it. What's so "unaesthetic" about it?
This is my first time back on here and commenting in months. Hello all 👋🏼 Quite frankly, I think I need braces too, as my teeth aren’t entirely straight, and I hate to smile and show my teeth sometimes because of the way they look; even though I’ve heard people say “they’re not that bad”, to me they are. It’s an insecurity I guess I share with this here fellow, and I feel like I can relate to him. Pardon my French, but, it sounds to me like he got stuck with a snooty, criticizing, judgmental b***h. I agree with the people who were saying HE should be the one postponing the wedding, she’s not for him. AT ALL
Hello 👋 and welcome back! I'm similar - would like my teeth 'finished' being straightened as the job done when I was a child wasn't quite good enough. I had four molars removed and braces and have still got a bit of a crooked smile. I'll be honest, In his shoes I'd not want to wear braces for my wedding photos (if I do get braces they'll be the invisible ones as, yes, I am self-conscious) but good for him not minding! I admire that. It should be completely up to him as to how his smile looks, not her. People get way too bogged down in petty detail. The wedding is actually quite a small part of it all, the MARRIAGE is what matters.
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On one hand she's encouraging to get his teeth fixed, which is great. In the other she's telling him that with braces he won't look good enough at their wedding. Weddings take weeks or months to plan and to want to postpone the whole thing because he's wearing braces would be a potential red flag for me.
I wonder if the encouragement to get his teeth fixed was purely for his benefit or if she was a bit embarrassed by that as well though? 🤷♀️
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Imagine this scenario: A man and a woman are engaged. The woman starts dieting to lose weight. The man says "why don't we postpone the wedding until you're skinny?". That's essentially the exact same situation as this, so I don't know how the OP can be that dense to think it wouldn't be massively insulting.
In this day and age of Photoshop, if you can't find a photographer that can remove the braces in the professional photos, then you need to find a better photographer. As for your fiance....if you are willing to postpone a wedding over braces, then I think he may want to find someone else that isn't so vain. Also, if you were that concerned about his appearance and he was worried about cost, why didn't YOU offer to pay for the invisible braces. You can't tell him how to spend his money...you're not married yet.
So she knows that he didn't get them as a kid because he felt ashamed, and them tells him she'd be ashamed if they were visible on the wetting photos. She really is TA, and doesn't deserve her man
Ummm, ever heard of this thing called photoshop? Truly one of the most ridiculous things I’ve ever read. Regardless, this dude is having a neon sign flashing “dodge” over and over in front of him as the bullet is heading his way. I hope he uses this chance to save himself.
If something that superficial means so much, she can easily have the pics Photoshopped. He is wise to think twice about the wedding.
He should cancel the wedding because the bride wants a beautiful wedding more than the marriage.
I don't usually comment on these types of things. You however are y t a and he is correct in suggesting canceling the wedding..
YTA. "He could have avoided this if he had gotten invisible braces. .". WOW, so this is his fault now? Yeah, call this off entirely. Don't marry this one.
Based on the title alone I'd say YTA. No need to read that full story. Why is it that the appearance of an event is much more important to some people than anything else? Like for example the well being of the supposed "loved ones"?
Oh hell, if he actually did get the Invisalign braces, she’d still be complaining about something else just as much, and be venting it on Reddit.
Man. There’s a guy I’m in love with too. I’d marry him tomorrow if he asked me. If all his teeth fell out I’d still marry him. If the only way we could get married is if he had braces, or black teeth, or crooked teeth, I’d marry him in a heartbeat. And we are barely even dating, he's not my fiancé. Some people just don’t know what they have until it’s gone.
This is so wholesome! Definitely how I felt about my husband when we first started dating. And so true about "partner's remorse" post screw up after a relationship. Hopefully it becomes a learning experience for OP, most likely after her fiance calls off the engagement altogether, that beauty's only skin deep.
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I think they can temporarily remove them and then put them back on (a girl in my HS did that for her graduation pics) but I don't know the cost of doing that or possible repercussions. Also getting them off isn't comfy and getting them back on right after sure wouldn't be pleasant. I was leaning NTA at first but I think I'm siding with majority now. She's too focused on that very minor detail.
She absolutely is focusing on a very minor detail! If it was HIM minding about how his smile looked in the photos I'd agree that he could do that or, more simply, just wait until the braces are off. Postponing the wedding is hardly a big deal either in the scheme of things - but it needs to be his choice at it is HIS smile. She should just be chuffed to bits at finding someone she loves, and is loved by, enough to want to marry! My overall memories of my wedding are just happy - the bits I didn't like are not top of mind when looking back and are things we just laugh at!
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I think the problem lies within how the bride deem stuff pretty or not. It’s just braces.
I got mine removed 2 weeks before my wedding. Orthodontist said if they weren't ready to come off he would remove them, put on a temp retainer and put them back on after the honeymoon for about $200. That was cheaper than the $350 photographer offered for photoshopping them out. But also nothing wrong with leaving them on and visible
The difference being it was your choice of course. You decided whether you wanted them on for your wedding or not and you didn't, which is fine. If he was the one who wanted to wait that's different. There is nothing wrong with wearing braces but I'd probably not want to wear braces in my wedding photos either if I'm honest. Though I'd not arrange to get married at the same time. I'd either get the braces after or get married after. It's odd that it's ended up at the same time as if there was zero thought about it. Braces take a long time to do their job and weddings take a while to plan. In truth these are petty things that don't matter in the scheme of life!
Load More Replies... I don't get the obsession with 'perfect' wedding pictures. Aren't they supposed to be a documentation of that day/moment? I wouldn't want it any other way than including all the flaws of the day. And then have a good old chuckle about it with my husband 40 years later. Those are the memories which are worth to be kept. Not the ones about the hustle to make everything 'perfect'.
I hope OP's fiance runs in the opposite direction. She sounds like she's focused on looks only and not the actual person.
Hmmm ... I thought the wedding vows were, "In sickness and in health, for better or worse..." I guess I was wrong. My eyes have been opened to the fact that weddings aren't the beginning of a new life together for two people who love each other, but just an event to show-off at, to hell with the *being married* part of it! (Sarcasm) But, seriously, the OP is a walking contradiction..."this doesn't bother me, except....it really does." Yikes.
I can kinda of see both sides here, she’s not saying that she’s embarrassed of him, she just wants their once in a lifetime photos to be nice. But I think we have to give her a bit of slack as she’s grown up in a digital world where people share their picture perfect wedding photos every day, she’s only 25. And like someone else said, those photos are expensive. I’m guessing my equivalent pressure would be the man in his uniform, toasting champagne glasses in front of a vintage car, and having a guard of honour to walk under. Didn’t do it, have three cats instead.
What she’s doing is displaying signs of ignorance and I’m being nice when I say it this way. A wedding photo is indeed a once in a lifetime photo, something special that you’re supposed to make count, and to cherish. There’s a flip side to all of that though, which is acceptance. If you’re going to marry someone and spend the rest of your life with them, you need to accept them 100% and not care about foolish little things like how they look in the wedding pictures. You love them, right? You chose to marry them and have a wedding day with them. Then you should’ve accepted them and their “flaws” too.
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She's more than the a-hole, she's a right kvnt. He should be thankful he found out she's a shallow woman before the wedding, get rid of her.
If you're engaged to someone who cares more about the wedding than the marriage, run. Run now. Run fast. Run far.
YTA. My husband had a problem with acne while we were dating, but he didn't want to get on meds because they caused uncomfortably dry skin. All of our wedding pics (pre-photoshop) show a giant zit in dead center of his forehead. No one cared and it was removed in the pics as part of the final wedding photos.
The ones that look like just a wire straight across look so cool to me. I don’t really like the ones with the dots on each tooth though.
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Hm.. You ignored your partner's feelings, and then proceeded to tell him how he's supposed to feel. Yeah no, YTA. I would've asked him first if he even wanted to wait to get them off, and if he said no, end of story we'll just continue as planned, nbd. Weddings aren't just about the bride and everything she wants. They're about both of you. BOTH of you are supposed to work together to figure out what to do and how to incorporate each other's wishes. I hate this stigma that 'women control the wedding and the men sit back' like.. No wonder y'all hate each other after 20 years of marriage. It wad doomed from the start.
Can you imagine the social media cancelling if the man had suggested they postpone the wedding until (insert something ) - she lost some weight, firmed up her thighs, got a nose job etc - because he didn't want the wedding pictures ruined? Yuck. Run away sir. 1. She is shallow. 2. An AITA post suggests she really doesn't get it.
"my fiancee wants to marry me because he loves me and I won't right now because he doesn't physically look perfect, am I a bad person?" Yes, and stupid, too! ^^ I'd add more, but if you're here wondering if you're a jerk then you're not at a comprehension level where you'd get it yet.
I think we have found the first bride in history to have never heard of Photoshop.
YTA You have a major issue with priorities. Your wedding is about both of you, not just what you want. You have made it very clear that your partner isn't a priority and his feelings really don't matter. After 35 years the only thing we do when we see our pictures is laugh, the superficial details of the day just aren't that important. How would you feel if he said you needed to wait to get married until you lost a few pounds? Not a great way to start a marriage.
If I was the guy, I would run for the hills and not look back. Red Flags everywhere.
Since turn about is fair play, she wouldn't be offended if he says he doesn't want to marry her until she has had implants to turn her bust 3 times the size it is, or that he wants her 10 to 20 pounds thinner, or any other majorly shallow c**p. Groom,run far from this nega witch and find someone who already thinks you are the perfect groom. Op, needs to just walk down the aisle with a RealDoll since only perfection will do for her demands.
Unrelated. I went to the r/aita sub and practiced my creative writing skills. I wrote two posts but they never really took off. Wouldn't it be something to see a post of mine make it here? Lol.
The first one I wrote was something about an argument with a roommate. It was important that no one is more "bad" than the other; both parties are somewhat equally bad, so I said my roommate is very noisy while I'm messy. I tried to downplay my messiness and focus on the roomate's noisiness. In our imaginary argument I used a bad word but never raised my voice while my roommate continued to raise her voice. The verdict posed by my fellow Redditors was ESH - everyone sucks here, meaning we're both the a*****e here. In hindsight I may have divided the faults too well
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Let's just pretend for a moment that the situation was this instead: OP is overweight and never took care of her body/health as a kid/teen. In adulthood, her doctors warn about the dangers of obesity and give her advice on weight loss, which she is now following successfully. Her fiancee then suggests that they postpone their wedding until she reaches a more aesthetically acceptable weight so that their photos are perfect. Who's TA now?
Never mind that there's this process called 'editing' of photos. Ever hear of Photoshop? So so much YTA.
I prefer the idea that they are who they are and that Photoshop is saying they are not good enough as is... I hate when people focus more on creating a false image than enjoying the moment.
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Dodged a bullet this one. He shouldn't marry her and he should totally, indefinitely postpone the wedding. What a shallow person! If it bothered you that much edit the photo. Don't put off marrying the love of your life. Pretty sure you have your own imperfections lady, but you don't see him calling to postpone the wedding. "Maybe we should postpone the wedding 3 months so you could lose 20 pounds."
Has this Bridezilla NEVER heard of PhotoShop? If I were her fiancé, I'd tell her the wedding is off. There is no such thing as 'perfect'.
WTF! I wouldn't care if my sexy tooter showed up with a black eye, missing 2 front teeth, and a strip shaved down the middle of his beautiful head! I cannot even fathom thinking this way! Man people really suck! So sorry my dude! Find someone who loves you even more for your braces and every wonderful thing about YOU!
"For better or worse, in sickness and in health...unless your braces show up in pictures" .Pretty sure braces didn't manifest themselves magically overnight. How could you have not known when you chose the date?
Stay single. Bring your kids up the same way lol. I was never happier until I found myself single at 43. That was 10 years ago and I'll never cohabit again, and doubt I'll ever allow myself to be in another relationship longer than 3 hours........
Photoshop is a thing. Not sure that's even the right way to go. That might hurt him too. But...c'mon it's 2023. All pictures are fake now.
Your fiance is a human being with feelings, not a prop for photographs. Yta
Your partner is yours to love even when they don't look their best 8n the eyes of the outside world, and their best is going to change over time. She would be devastated if he wanted to postpone the wedding until she got in shape, or got botox, or whatever her "flaws" are. She'd doubt his love, and whether she could trust him to stick around. He definitely shouldn't trust her.
You want perfect pictures. Braces are dealing with a health issue, guess he's not good enough with the braces on. Glad he sees the writing on the wall and you have shown your true colors before the big day. Now he can move on with his life and you will be free to find someone who looks good. O, you might want to check the next fiance's DNA to make sure there are no secrets or imperfections that might show up later. Wish you the best.
Yep YTA and a very shallow, narcissistic, self- involved twit. Exactly the same person he wanted to avoid in school. After pressing him to get braces you now want to shame him all so " you" can have " perfect" wedding photos? The only perfect wedding photos would be with a different bride. He needs to RUN and find someone who loves him warts and all! YTA
Can we just make this clear to all redditors... if your concern is more about being esthetically pleasing and good photos instead of the comfort of any participant, YTA. Dont even ask. yta.
Not the last 3 shallow a*s ppl also prioritizing LITERAL PHOTOS OVER THEIR PARTNERS FEELINGS! Bro. Photoshop exists for a reason. Edit the fucken braces put & call it a day. Got damn.
Whatever happened to Photoshop? All my wedding pictures were digital as usual nowadays and protoshopped. And it wasn't even an expensive photographer. It was just the standard package. Not weird-instagram-reality level of Photoshop but it had rained and there was mud on my dress and my makeup was ruined. You see it on the pictures my family took but not on those from the wedding photographer. Sheesh, heavens it can't be too difficult to find a photographer and have him edit out the braces if it's really just about the photos looking pretty. So I highly doubt this was about the photos. Also I've read it on Reddit and the date is already set, the invitations are out. What is wrong with that chick.
YTA. It was reasonable for the bride to ask the groom the first time if he wanted to postpone, but she took it way too far by insisting.
yeeeeeesh. hopefully, since the bride posted this online and got destroyed, she came to her senses. But if I were the groom here, I'd run far, far away. Postpone that wedding forever. She doesn't love him, she loves the idea of getting married.
It is perfectly possible to smile without showing your teeth. What is her problem?
Wow, is she ever TA. Run fast, groom. Far. And hard. Can’t even begin to imagine what she will be like as a wife. Also, misaligned jaw/teeth can be hereditary. Save your future progeny from people like her!
If I am this guy with braces I would consider my wedding with that lady that prefer pretty photos than my body with metals.
I think it’s perfectly reasonable; waiting is never a bad idea regardless of what issue happens to pop up; better to get through this now than regret getting married at all later on down the road. YNTAH/ he’s NTAH Besides~ he WAITED for his braces so he can certainly wait to get married, right?!?!
NTA, sorry, but I guess to be cool itt we have to pretend like braces is aesthetically pleasing or doesn't exist? Actually, not NTA, it's a bit shallow, but people are being way too defensive about this, like yeah, sorry, braces aren't cute on an adult, I'm all for positivity and all that but real talk.
Nobody said they were, but real talk, nobody is going to notice them and nobody cares about braces. She's making this a big deal and straining their relationship.
Load More Replies... A few people are saying NTA. You're completely missing the point. She devalued her husband and his feelings. YTA 100% lady.
I can't believe people are saying NTA. Especially after he told her how insecure he was about braces.
Load More Replies... Yep. Neither braces or even wanting to postpone (even if reason is silly) is a big deal. She wants it to be 'perfect' and there is no such thing. When people get bogged down with perfection they'll find other things wrong on the day. All sorts of things can go awry - best to just roll with it and not mind!
Load More Replies... This request could have a silver lining for the fiancé: he could take the opportunity to avoid marrying this woman altogether.
I had braces and headgear/retainers (google “orthodontic headgear 1980s” for an idea, it was abominable and went over your entire head) for most of my childhood. The teasing and bullying was relentless. It was horrible. Once I became an adult, I’d figured those kids who mocked and bullied me had grown up as well. Apparently, they don’t all grow up. OP is one of the latter.
Gosh, I had to wear it too. Dentist was smart enough to suggest I wear it at night. It was awful and, guess what? My front teeth are crooked anyway.
Load More Replies... I can't recall seeing wedding photos where a groom would wear braces either. You know why? Because there is nothing unusual about having braces on your teeth, so it doesn't immediately catch your attention when you see it. What's so "unaesthetic" about it?
This is my first time back on here and commenting in months. Hello all 👋🏼 Quite frankly, I think I need braces too, as my teeth aren’t entirely straight, and I hate to smile and show my teeth sometimes because of the way they look; even though I’ve heard people say “they’re not that bad”, to me they are. It’s an insecurity I guess I share with this here fellow, and I feel like I can relate to him. Pardon my French, but, it sounds to me like he got stuck with a snooty, criticizing, judgmental b***h. I agree with the people who were saying HE should be the one postponing the wedding, she’s not for him. AT ALL
Hello 👋 and welcome back! I'm similar - would like my teeth 'finished' being straightened as the job done when I was a child wasn't quite good enough. I had four molars removed and braces and have still got a bit of a crooked smile. I'll be honest, In his shoes I'd not want to wear braces for my wedding photos (if I do get braces they'll be the invisible ones as, yes, I am self-conscious) but good for him not minding! I admire that. It should be completely up to him as to how his smile looks, not her. People get way too bogged down in petty detail. The wedding is actually quite a small part of it all, the MARRIAGE is what matters.
Load More Replies... On one hand she's encouraging to get his teeth fixed, which is great. In the other she's telling him that with braces he won't look good enough at their wedding. Weddings take weeks or months to plan and to want to postpone the whole thing because he's wearing braces would be a potential red flag for me.
I wonder if the encouragement to get his teeth fixed was purely for his benefit or if she was a bit embarrassed by that as well though? 🤷♀️
Load More Replies... Imagine this scenario: A man and a woman are engaged. The woman starts dieting to lose weight. The man says "why don't we postpone the wedding until you're skinny?". That's essentially the exact same situation as this, so I don't know how the OP can be that dense to think it wouldn't be massively insulting.
In this day and age of Photoshop, if you can't find a photographer that can remove the braces in the professional photos, then you need to find a better photographer. As for your fiance....if you are willing to postpone a wedding over braces, then I think he may want to find someone else that isn't so vain. Also, if you were that concerned about his appearance and he was worried about cost, why didn't YOU offer to pay for the invisible braces. You can't tell him how to spend his money...you're not married yet.
So she knows that he didn't get them as a kid because he felt ashamed, and them tells him she'd be ashamed if they were visible on the wetting photos. She really is TA, and doesn't deserve her man
Ummm, ever heard of this thing called photoshop? Truly one of the most ridiculous things I’ve ever read. Regardless, this dude is having a neon sign flashing “dodge” over and over in front of him as the bullet is heading his way. I hope he uses this chance to save himself.
If something that superficial means so much, she can easily have the pics Photoshopped. He is wise to think twice about the wedding.
He should cancel the wedding because the bride wants a beautiful wedding more than the marriage.
I don't usually comment on these types of things. You however are y t a and he is correct in suggesting canceling the wedding..
YTA. "He could have avoided this if he had gotten invisible braces. .". WOW, so this is his fault now? Yeah, call this off entirely. Don't marry this one.
Based on the title alone I'd say YTA. No need to read that full story. Why is it that the appearance of an event is much more important to some people than anything else? Like for example the well being of the supposed "loved ones"?
Oh hell, if he actually did get the Invisalign braces, she’d still be complaining about something else just as much, and be venting it on Reddit.
Man. There’s a guy I’m in love with too. I’d marry him tomorrow if he asked me. If all his teeth fell out I’d still marry him. If the only way we could get married is if he had braces, or black teeth, or crooked teeth, I’d marry him in a heartbeat. And we are barely even dating, he's not my fiancé. Some people just don’t know what they have until it’s gone.
This is so wholesome! Definitely how I felt about my husband when we first started dating. And so true about "partner's remorse" post screw up after a relationship. Hopefully it becomes a learning experience for OP, most likely after her fiance calls off the engagement altogether, that beauty's only skin deep.
Load More Replies... I think they can temporarily remove them and then put them back on (a girl in my HS did that for her graduation pics) but I don't know the cost of doing that or possible repercussions. Also getting them off isn't comfy and getting them back on right after sure wouldn't be pleasant. I was leaning NTA at first but I think I'm siding with majority now. She's too focused on that very minor detail.
She absolutely is focusing on a very minor detail! If it was HIM minding about how his smile looked in the photos I'd agree that he could do that or, more simply, just wait until the braces are off. Postponing the wedding is hardly a big deal either in the scheme of things - but it needs to be his choice at it is HIS smile. She should just be chuffed to bits at finding someone she loves, and is loved by, enough to want to marry! My overall memories of my wedding are just happy - the bits I didn't like are not top of mind when looking back and are things we just laugh at!
Load More Replies... I think the problem lies within how the bride deem stuff pretty or not. It’s just braces.
I got mine removed 2 weeks before my wedding. Orthodontist said if they weren't ready to come off he would remove them, put on a temp retainer and put them back on after the honeymoon for about $200. That was cheaper than the $350 photographer offered for photoshopping them out. But also nothing wrong with leaving them on and visible
The difference being it was your choice of course. You decided whether you wanted them on for your wedding or not and you didn't, which is fine. If he was the one who wanted to wait that's different. There is nothing wrong with wearing braces but I'd probably not want to wear braces in my wedding photos either if I'm honest. Though I'd not arrange to get married at the same time. I'd either get the braces after or get married after. It's odd that it's ended up at the same time as if there was zero thought about it. Braces take a long time to do their job and weddings take a while to plan. In truth these are petty things that don't matter in the scheme of life!
Load More Replies... I don't get the obsession with 'perfect' wedding pictures. Aren't they supposed to be a documentation of that day/moment? I wouldn't want it any other way than including all the flaws of the day. And then have a good old chuckle about it with my husband 40 years later. Those are the memories which are worth to be kept. Not the ones about the hustle to make everything 'perfect'.
I hope OP's fiance runs in the opposite direction. She sounds like she's focused on looks only and not the actual person.
Hmmm ... I thought the wedding vows were, "In sickness and in health, for better or worse..." I guess I was wrong. My eyes have been opened to the fact that weddings aren't the beginning of a new life together for two people who love each other, but just an event to show-off at, to hell with the *being married* part of it! (Sarcasm) But, seriously, the OP is a walking contradiction..."this doesn't bother me, except....it really does." Yikes.
I can kinda of see both sides here, she’s not saying that she’s embarrassed of him, she just wants their once in a lifetime photos to be nice. But I think we have to give her a bit of slack as she’s grown up in a digital world where people share their picture perfect wedding photos every day, she’s only 25. And like someone else said, those photos are expensive. I’m guessing my equivalent pressure would be the man in his uniform, toasting champagne glasses in front of a vintage car, and having a guard of honour to walk under. Didn’t do it, have three cats instead.
What she’s doing is displaying signs of ignorance and I’m being nice when I say it this way. A wedding photo is indeed a once in a lifetime photo, something special that you’re supposed to make count, and to cherish. There’s a flip side to all of that though, which is acceptance. If you’re going to marry someone and spend the rest of your life with them, you need to accept them 100% and not care about foolish little things like how they look in the wedding pictures. You love them, right? You chose to marry them and have a wedding day with them. Then you should’ve accepted them and their “flaws” too.
Load More Replies... She's more than the a-hole, she's a right kvnt. He should be thankful he found out she's a shallow woman before the wedding, get rid of her.
If you're engaged to someone who cares more about the wedding than the marriage, run. Run now. Run fast. Run far.
YTA. My husband had a problem with acne while we were dating, but he didn't want to get on meds because they caused uncomfortably dry skin. All of our wedding pics (pre-photoshop) show a giant zit in dead center of his forehead. No one cared and it was removed in the pics as part of the final wedding photos.
The ones that look like just a wire straight across look so cool to me. I don’t really like the ones with the dots on each tooth though.
Load More Replies... Hm.. You ignored your partner's feelings, and then proceeded to tell him how he's supposed to feel. Yeah no, YTA. I would've asked him first if he even wanted to wait to get them off, and if he said no, end of story we'll just continue as planned, nbd. Weddings aren't just about the bride and everything she wants. They're about both of you. BOTH of you are supposed to work together to figure out what to do and how to incorporate each other's wishes. I hate this stigma that 'women control the wedding and the men sit back' like.. No wonder y'all hate each other after 20 years of marriage. It wad doomed from the start.
Can you imagine the social media cancelling if the man had suggested they postpone the wedding until (insert something ) - she lost some weight, firmed up her thighs, got a nose job etc - because he didn't want the wedding pictures ruined? Yuck. Run away sir. 1. She is shallow. 2. An AITA post suggests she really doesn't get it.
"my fiancee wants to marry me because he loves me and I won't right now because he doesn't physically look perfect, am I a bad person?" Yes, and stupid, too! ^^ I'd add more, but if you're here wondering if you're a jerk then you're not at a comprehension level where you'd get it yet.
I think we have found the first bride in history to have never heard of Photoshop.
YTA You have a major issue with priorities. Your wedding is about both of you, not just what you want. You have made it very clear that your partner isn't a priority and his feelings really don't matter. After 35 years the only thing we do when we see our pictures is laugh, the superficial details of the day just aren't that important. How would you feel if he said you needed to wait to get married until you lost a few pounds? Not a great way to start a marriage.
If I was the guy, I would run for the hills and not look back. Red Flags everywhere.
Since turn about is fair play, she wouldn't be offended if he says he doesn't want to marry her until she has had implants to turn her bust 3 times the size it is, or that he wants her 10 to 20 pounds thinner, or any other majorly shallow c**p. Groom,run far from this nega witch and find someone who already thinks you are the perfect groom. Op, needs to just walk down the aisle with a RealDoll since only perfection will do for her demands.
Unrelated. I went to the r/aita sub and practiced my creative writing skills. I wrote two posts but they never really took off. Wouldn't it be something to see a post of mine make it here? Lol.
The first one I wrote was something about an argument with a roommate. It was important that no one is more "bad" than the other; both parties are somewhat equally bad, so I said my roommate is very noisy while I'm messy. I tried to downplay my messiness and focus on the roomate's noisiness. In our imaginary argument I used a bad word but never raised my voice while my roommate continued to raise her voice. The verdict posed by my fellow Redditors was ESH - everyone sucks here, meaning we're both the a*****e here. In hindsight I may have divided the faults too well
Load More Replies... Let's just pretend for a moment that the situation was this instead: OP is overweight and never took care of her body/health as a kid/teen. In adulthood, her doctors warn about the dangers of obesity and give her advice on weight loss, which she is now following successfully. Her fiancee then suggests that they postpone their wedding until she reaches a more aesthetically acceptable weight so that their photos are perfect. Who's TA now?
Never mind that there's this process called 'editing' of photos. Ever hear of Photoshop? So so much YTA.
I prefer the idea that they are who they are and that Photoshop is saying they are not good enough as is... I hate when people focus more on creating a false image than enjoying the moment.
Load More Replies... Dodged a bullet this one. He shouldn't marry her and he should totally, indefinitely postpone the wedding. What a shallow person! If it bothered you that much edit the photo. Don't put off marrying the love of your life. Pretty sure you have your own imperfections lady, but you don't see him calling to postpone the wedding. "Maybe we should postpone the wedding 3 months so you could lose 20 pounds."
Has this Bridezilla NEVER heard of PhotoShop? If I were her fiancé, I'd tell her the wedding is off. There is no such thing as 'perfect'.
WTF! I wouldn't care if my sexy tooter showed up with a black eye, missing 2 front teeth, and a strip shaved down the middle of his beautiful head! I cannot even fathom thinking this way! Man people really suck! So sorry my dude! Find someone who loves you even more for your braces and every wonderful thing about YOU!
"For better or worse, in sickness and in health...unless your braces show up in pictures" .Pretty sure braces didn't manifest themselves magically overnight. How could you have not known when you chose the date?
Stay single. Bring your kids up the same way lol. I was never happier until I found myself single at 43. That was 10 years ago and I'll never cohabit again, and doubt I'll ever allow myself to be in another relationship longer than 3 hours........
Photoshop is a thing. Not sure that's even the right way to go. That might hurt him too. But...c'mon it's 2023. All pictures are fake now.
Your fiance is a human being with feelings, not a prop for photographs. Yta
Your partner is yours to love even when they don't look their best 8n the eyes of the outside world, and their best is going to change over time. She would be devastated if he wanted to postpone the wedding until she got in shape, or got botox, or whatever her "flaws" are. She'd doubt his love, and whether she could trust him to stick around. He definitely shouldn't trust her.
You want perfect pictures. Braces are dealing with a health issue, guess he's not good enough with the braces on. Glad he sees the writing on the wall and you have shown your true colors before the big day. Now he can move on with his life and you will be free to find someone who looks good. O, you might want to check the next fiance's DNA to make sure there are no secrets or imperfections that might show up later. Wish you the best.
Yep YTA and a very shallow, narcissistic, self- involved twit. Exactly the same person he wanted to avoid in school. After pressing him to get braces you now want to shame him all so " you" can have " perfect" wedding photos? The only perfect wedding photos would be with a different bride. He needs to RUN and find someone who loves him warts and all! YTA
Can we just make this clear to all redditors... if your concern is more about being esthetically pleasing and good photos instead of the comfort of any participant, YTA. Dont even ask. yta.
Not the last 3 shallow a*s ppl also prioritizing LITERAL PHOTOS OVER THEIR PARTNERS FEELINGS! Bro. Photoshop exists for a reason. Edit the fucken braces put & call it a day. Got damn.
Whatever happened to Photoshop? All my wedding pictures were digital as usual nowadays and protoshopped. And it wasn't even an expensive photographer. It was just the standard package. Not weird-instagram-reality level of Photoshop but it had rained and there was mud on my dress and my makeup was ruined. You see it on the pictures my family took but not on those from the wedding photographer. Sheesh, heavens it can't be too difficult to find a photographer and have him edit out the braces if it's really just about the photos looking pretty. So I highly doubt this was about the photos. Also I've read it on Reddit and the date is already set, the invitations are out. What is wrong with that chick.
YTA. It was reasonable for the bride to ask the groom the first time if he wanted to postpone, but she took it way too far by insisting.
yeeeeeesh. hopefully, since the bride posted this online and got destroyed, she came to her senses. But if I were the groom here, I'd run far, far away. Postpone that wedding forever. She doesn't love him, she loves the idea of getting married.
It is perfectly possible to smile without showing your teeth. What is her problem?
Wow, is she ever TA. Run fast, groom. Far. And hard. Can’t even begin to imagine what she will be like as a wife. Also, misaligned jaw/teeth can be hereditary. Save your future progeny from people like her!
If I am this guy with braces I would consider my wedding with that lady that prefer pretty photos than my body with metals.
I think it’s perfectly reasonable; waiting is never a bad idea regardless of what issue happens to pop up; better to get through this now than regret getting married at all later on down the road. YNTAH/ he’s NTAH Besides~ he WAITED for his braces so he can certainly wait to get married, right?!?!
NTA, sorry, but I guess to be cool itt we have to pretend like braces is aesthetically pleasing or doesn't exist? Actually, not NTA, it's a bit shallow, but people are being way too defensive about this, like yeah, sorry, braces aren't cute on an adult, I'm all for positivity and all that but real talk.
Nobody said they were, but real talk, nobody is going to notice them and nobody cares about braces. She's making this a big deal and straining their relationship.
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