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Parents Kick Teen Out With Just $20 In His Hand, Shocked When He Refuses To Help Them As They Age
Parents and kids don’t always see eye to eye, but regardless of what happens between them, their love for one another often remains the most important thing. Sometimes, though, adults might take rash decisions when it comes to disciplining kids, which can impact their relationship forever.
This is what happened between a man and his parents after they kicked him out at 16 due to his misbehavior. He had to struggle on the streets and stay with a friend until they finally took him back, but his trust in them never returned.
More info: Reddit
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When children feel betrayed by their parents, they might struggle to regain the trust they once had in them
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The poster had been a troublemaker at sixteen, but he had never done anything that bad, so he was shocked when his parents randomly kicked him out
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
His parents only gave him a $20 bill and then left him, so he had to sleep on the streets for two days and then crash at a friend’s house
Image credits: Rohmer Maxime / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
His dad came to pick him up after four days and said he did it only because the poster’s mom had forced him to do so
Image credits: DookieDanny
Even though the poster always wanted a connection with his parents, he struggled to forgive them for abandoning him when he needed them the most
When the poster was young, he acted out and gave his parents a hard time, just like most teens do. What he didn’t expect was for them to retaliate and punish him by suddenly kicking him out of the house. It was probably quite a sudden experience for him, and he also mentioned that they never told him exactly why they took such steps.
Although this is quite a harsh form of punishment, every parent has their own techniques for keeping their kids’ behavior in check. What most mental health professionals can agree on is that violent or harmful forms of discipline can actually do more harm than good, and unfortunately, take away from the “lesson” the parents want to teach.
It’s possible that the OP’s parents reached their breaking point and felt that they needed to take strict action against their son. That’s why they kicked him out of the house, but therapists state that this kind of “tough love” can eventually end up breeding resentment, fear, and anger. It might even cause the kid to lose trust in their parents.
That’s exactly what happened to the OP, especially because his dad left him at a random place with just $20 in his hand. The teen had nowhere to go and had to spend two days living on the streets, until a friend let him stay at their home for another two days. Only after all of that did his father come looking for him, that too at his wife’s insistence.
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
This traumatic incident in the poster’s childhood obviously scarred him, and he couldn’t trust his parents, even though they probably tried to get things back to normal. He did concede that they gave him good advice, and that he had tried to mend the relationship, but things didn’t seem the same at all.
According to experts, the reason for this could be the effect that abandonment tends to have on children, with many left feeling anxious, fearful, and even angry. Kids might constantly worry that their parents will leave them again if they do anything wrong, which can be very difficult feelings to deal with.
The poster also clearly felt hurt by his parents’ actions, and he shared that he had never truly healed from the experience. It seems like his mom and dad also never addressed the issue and probably pushed it under the rug, pretending like everything was okay. That’s why he hadn’t been able to move forward in his relationship with them.
Everyone wants to have a good relationship with their parents, and it can truly be painful if past trauma or anger comes between them. Hopefully, the poster is able to accept his feelings and move on, more for his peace of mind than theirs.
What advice would you give to a person dealing with a difficult family situation like this? Do share your words of wisdom down below.
People sided with the poster and told him it was completely his decision to forgive them or not, and that he didn’t have to do it if he didn’t want to
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What do you think ?
Earonn - 4 months ago
A teenager who talked back? My, what a monster! BTW, loved the reply "we are survivors of monsters, not monsters ourselves" Remember that, all you lovely Pandas who have abvsive parents!
Vinnie 4 months ago
I know, eh? Sassing is in the job description for a teenager. I get that it's frustrating for the parents, but most don't kick out their kids for it.
Load More Replies...
LakotaWolf (she/her) 4 months ago (edited)
I read the occasional post/story like this and I'm reminded of my own situation. My mom will be 81 in December, and my older sister - who is my parents' biological child; I'm adopted - is always harping on me to "spend time with Mom" and "go to lunch with Mom", etc. My mother ábused me through my entire childhood/teen years in literally every way you can ábuse a child - but never even spanked or yelled at my sister, her "perfect child". So yeah, no, I DON'T want to go to lunch with Mom, thanks, I'm good. My sister says "You'll regret not spending more time with Mom when she's dead!" Regret? Haha... no, no I won't. Like OP did, I also made efforts to repair the relationship with my mom when I was in my 20s and 30s... turns out narcissists don't live in the same reality that the rest of us do. She thinks she was a great mother. She REALLY hates when I bring up the time she pressed a gun to my throat when I was 6.
Uncle Panda 4 months ago
e-hugs (with appropriate consent paperwork on file)
Load More Replies...
FreeTheUnicorn 4 months ago
OP doesn't say kicking him out was out of character, or inconsistent with life with his parents, just that this was the most extreme. That incident seems emblematic of their treatment of him so it's not a surprise he isn't overcome with love and compassion for them. It's possible that one incident could still define their relationship, but it sounds like years of bad, but not so dramatic treatment was present. He clearly had tried over the years to have a better relationship, but I think whatever effort has been put in is more than they deserve. OP shouldn't be tied to his family who don't really care about him.
Nimitz 4 months ago
My parents did the same thing. When I was 17 we drove into town and as I was getting out of the car they told me not to come back and handed me a bag with some of my clothes in it. This was in Canada, mid-December. It was -21 Celsius that day. I never went back, but it's almost 25 years later and they're getting old and have zero retirement savings. They're both over 65 and still working. No matter what happens to them, I will never help them.
Fabulous chocolate cookie 4 months ago
My parents did the same when I was 10 years old. Kicked me out of the house and later called the cops when I actually ran away instead of trying to get home. Most likely to protect their own reputation as especially my mother is really focussed on how other people think of her and by maintaining a "perfect" image. My biological father luckilly already walked out of my life, even though he keeps trying to contact me, which I firmly refuse and will stay nc till he dies. But my mother is still so hypocritic about it. Every time I bring it up, she pretends it never happened and claims I'm trying to stir up drama for coming up with those "lies". Yeah sure, abandoning your child is a lie ofcourse in your perfect image. I assure you, you will regret it later when you rott away in a cheapo eldery home :)
Laserleader 4 months ago (edited)
My parents used me as their babysitter, divorce go-between, accused me of abandonment, and taking their livelihood (I was middle of 7 kids) along with various mental, emotional, amd religious abus. So, I had nothing to do with my Dad when he got cancer because all I asked was he tell his new wife the truth, so he died in his false world and I plan to desecration his grave when I find it. My Mother is a selfish hoarder, with self-delusions of grandeur, who manipulated me while gaslighted me, so I have cut her off since she also refuses to accept the truth. Once I decided they didn't deserve me, all my decades of severe depression were fairly lifted, and life is much better.
Beak Hookage 4 months ago
They obviously couldn't have cared less if he DIED, so why should he care a whit about them?
Miss Ann Thrope 4 months ago
I hear stories like this about once a week on Reddit. It's heart-breaking.
Tonyah Mcanelly 4 months ago
Do the parent not realize they are repsonsible for anything their child does until they are 18? and this is just child abandonment. I understand that teens are challenging raising 3 myself. they are going to test your patience and stretch those boundaries until they are on the verge of ripping. But they are also in a fragile state in their lives they are transitioning from childhood to adulthood. totally NTA . The people he depended on and trusted threw him to the wolves with no preparation .
liam newton-harding 3 months ago
It's quite obvious you are bringing your own issues to these comments. He was a CHILD, they were the parents, the adults...so, no, it wasn't his fault. You quite obviously need therapy to get over what happened, is happening between you, and your parents.
Load More Replies... Earonn - 4 months ago
A teenager who talked back? My, what a monster! BTW, loved the reply "we are survivors of monsters, not monsters ourselves" Remember that, all you lovely Pandas who have abvsive parents!
Vinnie 4 months ago
I know, eh? Sassing is in the job description for a teenager. I get that it's frustrating for the parents, but most don't kick out their kids for it.
Load More Replies... LakotaWolf (she/her) 4 months ago (edited)
I read the occasional post/story like this and I'm reminded of my own situation. My mom will be 81 in December, and my older sister - who is my parents' biological child; I'm adopted - is always harping on me to "spend time with Mom" and "go to lunch with Mom", etc. My mother ábused me through my entire childhood/teen years in literally every way you can ábuse a child - but never even spanked or yelled at my sister, her "perfect child". So yeah, no, I DON'T want to go to lunch with Mom, thanks, I'm good. My sister says "You'll regret not spending more time with Mom when she's dead!" Regret? Haha... no, no I won't. Like OP did, I also made efforts to repair the relationship with my mom when I was in my 20s and 30s... turns out narcissists don't live in the same reality that the rest of us do. She thinks she was a great mother. She REALLY hates when I bring up the time she pressed a gun to my throat when I was 6.
Uncle Panda 4 months ago
e-hugs (with appropriate consent paperwork on file)
Load More Replies... FreeTheUnicorn 4 months ago
OP doesn't say kicking him out was out of character, or inconsistent with life with his parents, just that this was the most extreme. That incident seems emblematic of their treatment of him so it's not a surprise he isn't overcome with love and compassion for them. It's possible that one incident could still define their relationship, but it sounds like years of bad, but not so dramatic treatment was present. He clearly had tried over the years to have a better relationship, but I think whatever effort has been put in is more than they deserve. OP shouldn't be tied to his family who don't really care about him.
Nimitz 4 months ago
My parents did the same thing. When I was 17 we drove into town and as I was getting out of the car they told me not to come back and handed me a bag with some of my clothes in it. This was in Canada, mid-December. It was -21 Celsius that day. I never went back, but it's almost 25 years later and they're getting old and have zero retirement savings. They're both over 65 and still working. No matter what happens to them, I will never help them.
Fabulous chocolate cookie 4 months ago
My parents did the same when I was 10 years old. Kicked me out of the house and later called the cops when I actually ran away instead of trying to get home. Most likely to protect their own reputation as especially my mother is really focussed on how other people think of her and by maintaining a "perfect" image. My biological father luckilly already walked out of my life, even though he keeps trying to contact me, which I firmly refuse and will stay nc till he dies. But my mother is still so hypocritic about it. Every time I bring it up, she pretends it never happened and claims I'm trying to stir up drama for coming up with those "lies". Yeah sure, abandoning your child is a lie ofcourse in your perfect image. I assure you, you will regret it later when you rott away in a cheapo eldery home :)
Laserleader 4 months ago (edited)
My parents used me as their babysitter, divorce go-between, accused me of abandonment, and taking their livelihood (I was middle of 7 kids) along with various mental, emotional, amd religious abus. So, I had nothing to do with my Dad when he got cancer because all I asked was he tell his new wife the truth, so he died in his false world and I plan to desecration his grave when I find it. My Mother is a selfish hoarder, with self-delusions of grandeur, who manipulated me while gaslighted me, so I have cut her off since she also refuses to accept the truth. Once I decided they didn't deserve me, all my decades of severe depression were fairly lifted, and life is much better.
Beak Hookage 4 months ago
They obviously couldn't have cared less if he DIED, so why should he care a whit about them?
Miss Ann Thrope 4 months ago
I hear stories like this about once a week on Reddit. It's heart-breaking.
Tonyah Mcanelly 4 months ago
Do the parent not realize they are repsonsible for anything their child does until they are 18? and this is just child abandonment. I understand that teens are challenging raising 3 myself. they are going to test your patience and stretch those boundaries until they are on the verge of ripping. But they are also in a fragile state in their lives they are transitioning from childhood to adulthood. totally NTA . The people he depended on and trusted threw him to the wolves with no preparation .
liam newton-harding 3 months ago
It's quite obvious you are bringing your own issues to these comments. He was a CHILD, they were the parents, the adults...so, no, it wasn't his fault. You quite obviously need therapy to get over what happened, is happening between you, and your parents.
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