Whether it’s setting up a lemonade stand, selling Girl Scout cookies, or simply watching how your parents deal with household expenses, our upbringing plays a big part in shaping our relationship with money.
There are many ways parents can explain finances to their children, but when Reddit user Disappointedkiddo198 set out to educate her 12-year-old on the matter, the girl’s teacher thought the woman was putting too much pressure on the kid.
In a post on the subreddit ‘Am I the [Jerk]?‘, the mom said that the lady even contacted her and gave her a scolding for it.
This woman tried to involve her daughter in the family’s budget decision-making
Image credits: Mary Taylor / Pexels (not the actual photo)
But the kid’s teacher had a problem with it
Image credits: Selvin Esteban / Pexels (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Joshua Hoehne / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Alexander Grey / Unsplash (not the actual photo)
Image credits: disappointedkiddo198
Experts believe that teaching your children about money is the right thing to do
Mitchell Kraus, founder of Capital Intelligence Associates in Santa Monica, California, said, “The best way parents can teach their children good financial habits is by discussing the money decisions that they make.”
Kraus acknowledges that everyone might have a different approach, but they should at least discuss their thinking on spending and saving with their kids.
“Most Americans have a choice on how to spend their money,” he said. “Some choose nicer cars and houses. Some choose experiences. Going over the choices with your children helps them understand your values and that life is full of choices.”
However, this shouldn’t come as a one-and-done conversation. “Where most parents stop short is following up with the children on how well those choices turned out and what choices they might want to make in the future.”
Judging from the Reddit post, it sounds like the mother was just taking a proactive approach to instilling financial awareness in her child.
In fact, according to experts, between the ages of 9 and 12 is a good time to get kids thinking about the value of money, and comparison shopping is actually one of the most effective ways to go about it.
Only this time, instead of reading the store’s price labels and comparing the bulk amount per cent, it was about amusement rides and candles.
People unanimously said that the author of the post did nothing wrong and that the teacher was out of her depth
She’s not the the AH for this. I was taught something similar at that age and ended up being more financially prepared when I was older. Kids wanna know finances and too many adults beg for schools to teach them. It’s our jobs as parents to fill the gaps in our children’s education on these things. My eldest is already learning! My youngest still likes to splurge… I hope he’ll get there.
You are definitely not the ah. As a teacher and parent, 1) no teacher in any school has the right to parent a parent, especially on a topic. You can guide them to help them with their child’s learning but you can’t tell them what parameters they should be setting or teaching their children. 2) schools ALWAYS have ways to handle things when a family can’t afford something a school offers or requires. No school in existence will stay open for long if they think they can… even private schools have options for those less able in their system. 3) parents that are open about the realities of life and finances have children who are able to handle life and finances. Parents who hide reality or mask it are creating the inevitable problems that their children face as adults.
Agreed! I am also a teacher and I wish more parents spent time with their kids about money so that it didn't fall to the schools as much. You can tell which families do educate their children on money because they treat the school supplies better because they understand that things cost money and there isn't an infinite pot of it. Besides, in this story, if the mom didn't explain the whys to the daughter, she would have thought she was being denied one of the events because she was being punished for something or because her parents didn't care about her as much as the other families cared for their children.
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My parents were struggling financially when I was a little younger than the op's daughter and I wish my parents would have explained it to me at the time. I of course knew something was up, but not knowing the facts led to some catastrophising and anxiety on my part. 12 is a perfect age to learn about things like how to manage your money anyway, so strong NTA.
We didn't have a lot of money growing up, but my mom brought all us kids in on the family finances. We helped pay the bills, we helped budget and plan... And not once have I ever thought to myself that she was in the wrong. I found it to be empowering and highly valuable - so much so that I do it with my own kid. My job as a parent - just like with every other animal that rears their young - is to teach my offspring how to become a functional adult. He won't learn money management without exposure and experience. It takes time and a safe space to practice and make mistakes. Mom was not in the wrong at all; teacher was way off the mark.
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She’s not the the AH for this. I was taught something similar at that age and ended up being more financially prepared when I was older. Kids wanna know finances and too many adults beg for schools to teach them. It’s our jobs as parents to fill the gaps in our children’s education on these things. My eldest is already learning! My youngest still likes to splurge… I hope he’ll get there.
You are definitely not the ah. As a teacher and parent, 1) no teacher in any school has the right to parent a parent, especially on a topic. You can guide them to help them with their child’s learning but you can’t tell them what parameters they should be setting or teaching their children. 2) schools ALWAYS have ways to handle things when a family can’t afford something a school offers or requires. No school in existence will stay open for long if they think they can… even private schools have options for those less able in their system. 3) parents that are open about the realities of life and finances have children who are able to handle life and finances. Parents who hide reality or mask it are creating the inevitable problems that their children face as adults.
Agreed! I am also a teacher and I wish more parents spent time with their kids about money so that it didn't fall to the schools as much. You can tell which families do educate their children on money because they treat the school supplies better because they understand that things cost money and there isn't an infinite pot of it. Besides, in this story, if the mom didn't explain the whys to the daughter, she would have thought she was being denied one of the events because she was being punished for something or because her parents didn't care about her as much as the other families cared for their children.
Load More Replies... My parents were struggling financially when I was a little younger than the op's daughter and I wish my parents would have explained it to me at the time. I of course knew something was up, but not knowing the facts led to some catastrophising and anxiety on my part. 12 is a perfect age to learn about things like how to manage your money anyway, so strong NTA.
We didn't have a lot of money growing up, but my mom brought all us kids in on the family finances. We helped pay the bills, we helped budget and plan... And not once have I ever thought to myself that she was in the wrong. I found it to be empowering and highly valuable - so much so that I do it with my own kid. My job as a parent - just like with every other animal that rears their young - is to teach my offspring how to become a functional adult. He won't learn money management without exposure and experience. It takes time and a safe space to practice and make mistakes. Mom was not in the wrong at all; teacher was way off the mark.
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