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“What Is Something Considered To Be ‘Normal’ By Society That You Refuse To Do?” (40 Answers)
We tend to go through life accepting a lot from society. We use these pieces of paper to buy things? Got it. I must work somewhere to earn more paper to ensure I can eat and have shelter? Yes sir. We must abide by rules the government decided on even if we disagree with them? Okay, sure. If we questioned everything that society considers normal, we’d go crazy. But recently, Reddit users have been discussing some socially acceptable things that upon further reflection, they decided they’ll never do.
2 months ago, Reddit user fuzziblanket asked, “What is something considered to be ‘normal’ by society that you refuse to do?” We’ve gone through the responses and curated this list of some of the most interesting topics that you may have never even questioned before. Whether you commonly do these activities or not, enjoy reading through them and determining if you still consider them normal. Be sure to upvote the answers you’d like other pandas to see, and let us know in the comments what “normal” things you’d never be caught doing.
Then if you’re looking for another Bored Panda piece pointing out odd yet socially acceptable things, look no further than right here.
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recording yourself doing an act of charity or a good deed in general. completely devalues it the second you hit post
What’s considered “normal” is determined by society, but there are many societies around the globe that have their own quirks. In the United States, for example, it’s totally normal to drive your car anywhere you go, even if it’s just a mile away because there might not be decent sidewalks or crosswalks to get to your destination. In many other countries where roads are built to better accommodate pedestrians, this would be considered bizarre. It’s also normal in many European countries for kids to walk or bike to school by themselves, especially when they’re about 8-years-old or older. This would be very rare in the US. Even when in their own neighborhood, American kids are usually expected to have adult supervision at all times. When paying at a restaurant in the US, patrons typically hand the server their card, the server takes it to their computer, and then they return with the receipt. If a server in a European country tried to walk off with someone’s credit card, the customer might assume they were being robbed. Societal norms vary greatly based on where you are, so there's nothing wrong with questioning them. They might be more arbitrary than you think!
Forbidding my (straight male) partner to spend time with female friends. He's a grown-a*s man; he should know how to hold healthy boundaries. It shouldn't be on me to keep him from cheating. If he's really gonna fall into the pants of the first girl I leave him alone with, she can have him.
Similarly, blaming someone else for my partner's failings, and/or trying to "win back" someone who doesn't want me. He's a big boy who can make his own choices (even bad ones), and I want a partner who wants to be with me, not someone I had to talk into staying.
(For the record, my dudeman of 20 years is awesome.)
Anyone that enters into a relationship and starts setting the terms and conditions of their new partners interactions is definitely not a healthy person to be with!
Shouldn't be on the list though. It's not normal. Never met anyone who bans their man from hanging out with women, whether friends or workmates.
Load More Replies...Like I got asked by one of my husbands friends if they can go take a beer during the week. I was like - why do you ask me? You should ask him instead...
Yes! My husband and I work at the same place and often his coworkers ask if it's ok for him to go do whatever after work with them. Despite me telling them we are equals and he doesn't need my permission. We often drive in together and live 45min away but as long as they plan i don't care. And even spur of the moment plans are ok; just means you drive him home or tell me when/where to pick him up. I've never understood couples who can't go out with friends unless both parties are there.
Load More Replies...I never understood getting mad at the person who had the affair with your partner. Your partner is the one who lied, duped, and failed on their commitment. The other person is just some stranger doing what they want to do. Unless of course it's a friend, in which case you have two people to dump, and you can find solace in the fact that those two people who don't respect relationships actually deserve each other.
I have seen people who were not happy with their partners keeping in touch with their old friends of opposite sex(they are straight). Also some think that after marriage they can only go on trips with their spouse and not with their friends. I never understood this.
It doesn't matter how strict you are to your partner, if they want to have an affair, they will.
Forbidding anyone to see someone is not "a normal thing" to do in the first place...
If you have to spy on your partner or give them stupid rules to follow your partner isn't the one for you. The second you have to beg someone to stay is the time to go ahead and part ways gracefully.
If people don't trust their partners to be alone with other people why are they with them?
It depends on the friend and whether or not they respect your relationship. My husband is welcome to go on overnight camping trips with his best female friend, even though she's gorgeous and brilliant, because I like her and trust her. But he had another female friend who was obviously in love with him and was very hostile toward me when we met. She would tag along with his other friend just to be near him, and it really bothered me. I had remained friends with an ex who was still showing romantic interest in me. My husband and I agreed that it was necessary to set some boundaries, so I dropped my ex as a friend, and he only sees his bff without her sidekick. His other female friends have become close friends of mine over time, and my life is richer for knowing them. It's natural to need to make some compromises when you get married. It's good to keep an open mind, but be aware that some people will deliberately create friction in your relationship when they see an opportunity to do so. Keeping people in your life who have an agenda to sabotage your relationship is just going to create stress for your partner.
I think it is perfectly ok to set your own "shoulds" and "oughts," but not someone else's. If your partner is doing something that you are not ok with, you should have that discussion and come to an understanding together even if the result is that you are no longer a couple.
I had a friend like this. Nice guy but when he would get into a relationship it would become his entire life. On the surface that doesn't sound too bad (being a dedicated boyfriend and all) but he used to take it too far and some of the girls (whom I also knew) told me that he was too smothering. Inevitably they would end things with him at which point he'd spend months obsessing and fretting and trying to win them back. I never understood that, why spend all that time and energy trying to get back with someone who clearly didn't want to be with you?
Loss is the hardest thing humans deal with, and sometimes people aren’t ready to let go. : /
Load More Replies...I have friends that are male and my boyfriend has female friends. There's nothing wrong with being friends with the opposite sex. I only love my boyfriend and he only loves me and we both trust each other.
Same goes the other way too though. Men shouldn't be all "well you are with me. You can't talk to other men. It's cheating." Like wow, I said thank you cuzsomeonee held a door...
I completely agree with this post. Unfortunately, I used to be that girl who didn't want her boyfriend to hang out with his female friends cause I thought they were way more attractive than me. I also knew that he also thought they were attractive, but said that he was not attracted to them. He is also of the opinion that if he hangs out with a female friend, he will only hang out with her if they are with a group of friends, not him alone with said female friend. I also agree with his opinion, but if that were to happen and he cheated, that's on him and not me.
I think this is a talk you might want to have early on in the relationship. There's something to be said for healthy and clear communication between mates.
See i have had for my whole life best guy friends only , so is this taboo ? No one told me that
Couldn't have said it any better myself. I have close friends of both sexes who I hang out with and love dearly. That doesn't mean I'm going to jump their bones.
A person I know, who is not the most progressive of men, told me "if she wants to cheat, she'll find a way, so making rules about where she can go or who she can spend time with is just stupid." Another person, who is wise in general, told me "If I trust my partner and they violate that trust, I will only suffer from the pain from that. If I do not trust my partner, I will always suffer, whether they violate my trust or not, and it will do nothing to mitigate the additional pain I will feel if they do violate my trust".
Forbidding your partner from doing ANYTHING is not normal. It's manipulative and abusive. Imagine if a man did that to a woman how up in arms people would be. It works both ways.
One of my best friends is a guy and I meet up with him for drinks at least once a month. My hubby doesn't care, he knows he can trust me. I've always had a lot of guy friends, hubby was one of them! I literally tell him everytime someone hits on me because we laugh about it and he goes "see I told you! You're a sexy lady!"
Oh Christ yes. I had a man friend at work and when his wife found out she went full crazy, tried to get me fired, read all our full (work) messages. Whenever she sees me she freaks out. He's 'not allowed' to any work do's now and their relationship is basically ruined. She wrote me loads of crazy emails explaining she knew there had been no physical aspect to our relationship but the friendship was so close it was unacceptable. When I told her I thought a close relationship without sex was generally classed as friendship she said it was an 'emotional affair' wtaf. We mainly joked about the pigeons in our work car park and chatted about our kids and a mutual friend. For the record I'm happily married with young children and just had another baby.
It's probably her insecurity speaking. The sad part is that there was no issue until she created it and ruined her relationship herself😕
Load More Replies...This this this! The fact that every friendship between a grown man and woman is assumed to be sexual is so insulting and just infantile.
100% agree. So sick of hearing women blame other women for their boyfriend/husbands bad behaviour!
I remember seeing an episode of A Wedding Story (old TLC show that would follow a couple from how they met to when they got married, the last few minutes were parts of the actual wedding ceremony) where the groom's best friend just happened to be female. He asked his bride if she would mind having Best Friend as "best woman" at their wedding, since he didn't really feel like he had any male friends who fit the bill. Bride wasn't jealous at all, knew and trusted Best Friend, so of course she said yes. It was a lovely wedding.
Oh yes!! I love this!! I say this all the time!! I'm not his mother!! I'm his partner if I can't trust him to have friends outside our relationship then I don't want that relationship!! He's also allowed to do want he wants!! Yes we live together but we also communicate about plans and what's happening! If we so happen to have different plans on the same day we compromise! No we're not perfect!
But if you're not going to sleep with them they're just real friends right?
I agree with you, but for me and hubby we have made biblical choices. We don’t open any door that could be viewed by someone else as wrong and lead to drama. I refuse to be alone with any man, If hubby has to be in a room alone with a female like maybe at work, the door stays open. We have both had unfaithful partners in the past. If you have been cheated on you have baggage and this is how we handle it
And if you feel left out or excluded, you can share that with your partner, so everyone can plan a time for you to join them at some future event. The expectations should be that sometimes you go out with just your friends and your partner goes out with just their friends, and sometimes everyone can plan to find some time to do something together. There shouldn't be any awkwardness with sharing friends and acquaintances as long as there's an understanding that healthy couples allow each other space.
"i never want my man to look at another girl" get a blind boyfriend then
This is incredible! I’m literally in this situation right now:my downstairs’ neighbors, guy&girl with a kid, not married… for all the years we’ve lived in different apts/same house, she’s been jealous of “us,” & doesn’t get him having a female friend at all. She’s very insecure & tries to control him in every way.He’s not allowed to hang out with anyone, especially women.Last week she was drunk & allowed me in the presence of her and her man, along with a friend of mine.We were cooking out, talking, and she managed a “…don’t f**k my boyfriend” to me.😳My friend said the bad vibes were obvious from the min they met, and it just kept getting worse. I finally got another 1st hand, obj opinion & I’m realizing she acts like a narcissist: controlling, pas-agr, and fake.I feel so bad for this guy, he’s so cool.I’m the only person he talks to & ap’ly, that that makes her more possessive.It’s so sad.I really want to keep him as a friend.G knows he needs one. Thx for the ear, folks.
Tbh i don't even mess with monogamy culture or it's enablers/sympathizers (eg "ethical non monogamy" which cares more about catering to the feelings and hangups insecure weirdos than it does on setting healthy and ethical standards of non monogamy. Like how one penis polices, unicorn hunting, just adding disposable "side pieces" on the "real relationship" etc always harms at least one person, usually all, and is rooted in misogynistic queer fetishism and monogamous attitudes) I'm strictly a relationship anarchist,and i do not entertain any kind of romantic connection with anyone who isn't on that same page. Because really this whole culture can rot
You have great confidence & self worth in yourself! Kudos to you! ❤️ ❤️
Speaking as a 30 something strait male, I can say with certainty that if I'm trying to "befriend" a girl it's only because there could be the opportunity to have sex with her sometime in the future...ofcourse Its totally ok for guys to be cool with a girl theyre not trying to bone, no need to be rude, but like "besties" and s**t with one, highly unlikely...
With expectations like that, it’s not surprising you don’t have any female friends.
Load More Replies...Culturally my husband and I are in agreement about not having friends of the opposite gender so it doesn't come up as an imposition of one on the other
Oh yes, so true! I have male friends my fiancè has female friends and thats really great! People are people it does not matter if male. female, non-binary or whatever. It is only important that we could have fun together and can talk with each other.
I get sick of being held responsible for my hubby's actions. He's an adult and people are always telling me off when he gets hammered at the pub for example. He only gets hammered on the weekend if he does at all so I don't really care.
Oooooomg this was something my ex did not understand. He thought he didn't need to see a therapist, thought he didn't need any friends besides me, and wanted me to make our relationship closed. I already wasn't doing anything with anyone else, it was on him entirely to make it a closed relationship (which I don't mind that it was partially opened, sex is sex to me). But putting the responsibility on my shoulders would have just made it "my fault" if he had cheated. He would have closed it if he'd wanted to. There were...many red flags I should have noticed early on, but I was naïve.
My dudeman died a few years ago. Will I ever get involved with a new guy? Probably not -- guy friends are wonderful. I don't know if romance is in my future so...
Exact same. Word for word. Anything outside of this seems ridiculous
I kinda feel bad for dudeman. Trust is #1 in relationships. If you can't trust him due to maybe your own insecurities, you need to get your mentality in check. I have also been with my man 17 years... since I was 19. (Friends since I was 18). Basically my entire adult life. We give each other total freedom. Neither one has acted because it's not forbidden. After all, the forbidden fruit taste best! Just don't for it the fruit and it won't be as nice. Just some unsolicited advice to the OP
Think what you want, but a married man should never be in the same room, elevator, office, car, or restaurant with a woman unless it is his wife or he is accompanied with his wife or other people. Same applies to women. A man is always "wrong" so be right and never be alone with a woman, especially a coworker who can blackmail you.
Pacifying neurotic,insecure narcissistic people by restricting your own freedom and life more and more because of a unequal relationship with a neurotic narcissist never works. It ends up creating alot of unhappiness,resentment and feelings of imprisonment. Narcissists suck at being human beings. Dont date narcissists. Learn who they are and how to detect and avoid them. Learning this has brought much peace to my life.
Load More Replies... I don't know if it's been mentioned already, but I'll throw in my 5 cents.
The need to be available 24/7, i.e. always having your phone on you.
I like going for long walks and leaving my phone at home. I don't feel guilty for missing texts or calls, it's just stressful being expected to be available all hours of the day.
It's sad times when people are apologizing for not responding within a minute to a text. I have to tell friends to chill out. A text is not going to disappear. We all have other priorities and no one should expect anyone to stop their lives all of a sudden to engage in a conversation out of the blue.
One of the socially acceptable activities mentioned on this list is drinking alcohol. While alcohol has been around for centuries, it’s also the most commonly abused substance. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with having a couple drinks, especially in social settings. Alcohol is linked with many cultures, as sharing a bottle of wine with a loved one or enjoying some beers with your best friends can be great ways to bond. Holidays tend to be filled with booze in many places as well.
But regardless of how socially acceptable drinking is, it’s completely fair to question it too. People who have experience with alcoholics in their families or personal lives may decide that drinking will never be for them. Others decide to refrain from drinking for religious or health reasons. Drinking heavily can lead to developing heart, liver, or kidney issues and can even increase an individual's likelihood of developing cancer. It's completely up to individuals whether or not they decide to drink; no one should ever feel pressured to order a drink because its expected by society.
give a s**t about celebs. Sometimes they're fun to talk about for like 5 minutes but other than that? Aren't they just people? I don't get it.
Work myself to death.
Edit: I commented this, passed out, and now it blew up. Thank you for the awards.
Also please use your vacation days. Your sick days. Take your dog out. Hang out with the family. Even if you're alone like me - Go do something you like.
Talk to toxic family members
This!!! Being related to someone does not grant them permanent space in your life. If they are not good people, you DON'T owe them your time, your forgiveness or your love.
Smoking is another habit that’s considered socially acceptable in some places but more taboo in others. We’re all well aware of cigarettes being carcinogens, and most of us have seen terrifying examples of what smoking can do to the body our entire lives. Yet for some reason, smoking is still incredibly common and accepted in many countries. In Greece, for example, about 38% of the population smokes, including 47% of men. According to cardiologist and tobacco control researcher Konstantinos Farsalinos, “Greeks aren’t highly motivated to quit. There is plenty of education, and we have smoking cessation centers, but they are not popular. There is not a lot of social pressure to quit smoking. Although there are laws prohibiting indoor smoking, those laws are not obeyed. So that reduces the social pressure. So, the smoker tends to forget the reasons why smoking is bad for you. Most Greek smokers only quit when they develop disease.” While the culture around smoking is different everywhere, it’s definitely worth questioning if it’s accepted wherever you live.
Push for the removal of homeless. They need help, not further persecution.
Honestly, it depends. We have organized beggar clans, which get driven into the country in spring and back home in autumn. They refuse any and all help, they even refuse to use the toilets specifically installed for them only they have a key for, and instead s**t on sidewalks and p**s in parks and bike parking spaces instead. I get persecution.
Wear makeup. If I can deal with my face, so can everyone else
Similarly to smoking, people around the world have very different views on recreational drugs as well. Marijuana is particularly controversial, as it has been legalized for recreational use in 6 countries, 19 states in the US, and parts of Australia. In places where it is legal, like the state of Oregon for example, it usually is considered socially acceptable. Sure, it’s not for everyone, but it’s legal and harmless, so people tend to mind their own business. However, in other places where it is heavily enforced, like the Philippines where it is considered a "dangerous drug", people are a lot less likely to openly discuss their marijuana use. How socially acceptable recreational drugs are depends greatly on individual cultures, but even in places where marijuana is common, there will always be those who simply have no interest in getting high.
My dad just scolded me because I was unwilling to put in 60+ hrs/week at a new salaried job by saying 'I've worked 70/hr since I was out of college!'
Yeah dad, that's probably why you missed every important life event and smoke a juul at age 57
I don’t drink or do illicit drugs. Alcohol messes with my medication, and pot gives me anxiety. I am a sober person and people often give me s**t about it and call me boring.
I’m sorry to break this to you, but you’re hanging out with the wrong people. Unless everyone is drunk, being with drunk people is really boring!
Hang out in a social setting where the music is so gawdam loud that you have to scream at the person next to you to communicate.
Another thing mentioned on this list that some people swear they’ll never experience is dating apps. Online dating originally began in 1995 when Match.com launched, but as our culture has become increasingly obsessed with the internet since then, finding love online has only become more and more common. In 2020, the Pew Research Center found that 30% of Americans had ever used a dating site or app, including 48% of people between the ages of 18-29. These numbers have likely only gone up since the onset of the pandemic, though, and online dating is even more common among members of the LGBT+ community. Pew found that 55% of LGBT respondents had experience on a dating site or app, with 21% of them saying they had even been in a serious relationship with someone they met online.
Two months ago, my dad died. He had cancer and had had it for like a year.
I told my work over and over again that he was really sick. I work in an office and am on a computer all day. I have a company-supplied laptop. I have the ability to work from home, but I was not allowed to do so because I was an hourly employee.
I told them that his condition was worsening. I live five hours from my parents. They refused to accommodate me, even when I offered to work every day from my parents house, just so I could be with him.
They said 'well maybe when the situation gets more dire.'
I tried to apply for FMLA (I think that’s the right acronym) and I wasn’t eligible because I was hourly and hadn’t been there for a year yet, despite the circumstances. A week before he died I told my boss that it was almost time and I might have to take off work.
They were not concerned and told me as long as I got my work done and didn’t miss deadlines. I took the day he died off work—I just had a bad feeling, and was packing to go see him when he passed.
I told my work and they don’t have bereavement leave. So I offered to work remotely during this period and again they refused. Again, I have a 'good job' working at a huge corporation, in an office; my job requires a degree.
I was forced to use all of my sick time and some of my PTO so I could attend his funeral and help my mother with arrangements.
And I'm stuck here because I can't afford to quit without something else lined up. I've been looking. They obviously don't see us as humans.
You don’t owe your company anything. I would give anything to go back and time and quit, just to spend the last few weeks with my dad.
Whatever company you work for doesn’t care about you, only about how much you make them. Don’t worry about screwing them over or anything because at the end of the day, you could die and they would consider it a small inconvenience.
This. Companies think they're the most important s**t on the planet over humans. Idc if it's business or what. They're run by humans who've forgotten where they came from and the meaning of what's important. We're not slaves to corporations. We're brainwashed into believing we need them.
Have kids.
I'm a 38 year old woman with lots of experience with kids - I like kids! - but people think that is a reason to birth them.
Being able to opt in or opt out of hanging out with munchkins is great! I love being Aunt Mary Rose and not Mommy!
Ironing. Life is too short. I don't even own an iron and my clothes are just fine.
I may be weird, but I love ironing. The best part is when you watch the transformation of a shirt, from a wrinkled to a smooth one. I love it!
When it comes to apps specifically, they did begin as a way for same-sex couples to meet. Grindr, a location-based app geared towards gay and bisexual men, launched in 2009 and started somewhat of a sexual revolution in the gay community. Since then, dating apps have become the norm for everyone regardless of sexual orientation. Tinder launched in 2012, and now has over 50,000,000 users. But just because dating apps are now socially acceptable doesn’t mean everyone has to use them. In fact, about half of Americans say that online dating has had neither a positive or negative effect on their love lives. If you prefer to meet people the old fashion way, there’s no reason to feel pressured into using the internet.
Don't follow sports
I get really annoyed when people don't understand "I don't care it is boring to me" as an excuse to explain it to me in minute detail, as I just don't understand it. My usual response is to start explaining software development to them. Strangely they aren't interested and don't want to talk about it.. and yet don't get the link.
Yes. People are flabbergasted when I’m not informed on the latest celebrity news and honestly I just don’t see a reason to keep up with it
Smoking. I can't stand cigarette smell.
I'm a smoker (down from 30/day to 10/day and on my way to quitting completely), and I always ensure I'm well away from everyone when I light up. No one wants to breathe my smoke or even get it on their clothes. It absolutely is a disgusting habit, and I wish my parents hadn't smoked, because I probably would never have started.
Social media is another thing that has become socially acceptable, but still doesn’t appeal to everyone. Since social media began in the early 2000s, it has dominated the internet. In 2004, MySpace was the first site of its kind to reach over 1 million monthly active users, but today, Facebook has 2.89 billion active users. Facebook has been the most popular social media site globally for over a decade now, but Youtube is quickly catching up, with 2.29 billion active users. Among the other most successful sites are Instagram, which currently has 2 billion active users, and TikTok, which has only been around since 2016 and already has 1 billion active monthly users.
Walk in the house with shoes.
Why people want to track all the junk from the outside and smear it over the floors , bed, and couch?! No thanks
Here in Finland that's considered VERY rude and it makes sense to take the shoes off.
Call my coffee something other than small, medium & large.
Bore other people with photos of everyday stuff they see all the time anyway. For example, the meal I am going to eat, the shoes I bought, the place I am at.
If it's on social media people have the choice to just scroll past it.
Despite how popular social media sites are, it’s understandable why some people would want to avoid them. One of the biggest reasons people cite for staying off these apps is because they can be a huge waste of time. The average global user spends about 2 hours and 27 minutes on social media per day, with average users in Nigeria and the Philippines spending over 4 hours per day. It’s easy to rack up hours on these sites though, as they are typically designed to be addictive. With features like “likes” and feeds designed to constantly show users new content, these websites are aimed at getting users hooked.
Do “lives” on social media. Since when did vanity and narcissism become so acceptable?
No one cares about your dining experience or “get ready with me” moments.
Text while hanging with friends, or out to dinner, or driving, or in a movie theater.
I'll text my man to update him on if I plan on being home soon, as a courtesy, but otherwise my phone is out of sight. Texting around others is rude.
One Night Stands
Sex doesn't mean anything to me if I can't build a connection first
Social media is also notorious for causing users to compare themselves to others, which can negatively impact their self esteem. One study from the University of Pennsylvania even found that reducing social media use to only 30 minutes a day resulted in a reduction in anxiety levels, depression, loneliness, sleep problems and FOMO (fear of missing out). Like everything else, there’s nothing wrong with using social media in moderation. But just because it’s considered “normal” to spend hours a day on these sites does not mean you need to create an account today. If your life is perfectly fine without social media, I’m sure it won’t be any better with it.
Going in debt $30k-$70k for a vehicle.
Which begins to depreciate the minute you drive it out of the lot. I've always bought used cars, and I've never regretted it.
Shave/wax my pubes. I actually really like having pubic hair. It doesn't bother me or my partner, and I find waxing and/or shaving extremely uncomfortable and not at all worth it.
Buy fast fashion (or pretty much any fashion whose supply chain is questionable). I used to. Then I found out not only how and where those clothes begin their lives, but also how and where those clothes end their lives.
It was so horrific, I decided I was done. I now buy secondhand, or I save and buy pieces from independent tailors from sites like Etsy. And I research the tailor too.
I also took some of the money I saved from clothes shopping and got a sewing machine. I am learning to sew and make my own summer dresses (I'm not good enough yet to take on complex clothing, but I'm learning)
My grandmother made most of my clothes for me when I was a child, and she had an old treadle machine that she eventually replaced with something more in keeping with the times. After my poor grandfather died after living on without my grandmother for 11 years, my aunt had all of the grandchildren—who were all adults—had each of us walk through my grandparents’ home of 60+ year (a home my grandfather built) and put a Post-It with our name on anything we wanted to take home with us. I chose a small number of things, all of which were made by one or the other of my grandparents, and I took home everything I asked for.
I think this list has taught us that just because something is considered "normal" does not mean we have to go along with it. We all have the right to make our own choices, and what's socially acceptable totally depends on where we end up living. Enjoy the rest of this list, and remember to upvote the answers you most agree with. Then let us know in the comments if you think of any other "normal" activities you would never do that didn't make it onto this list.
My wife and I had a very small wedding on a beach with only our parents there. Then, we drove to a mountain and hiked to the top with our photographer for our first dance.
It was incredible and people keep telling us they wish they could’ve done something that simple but social pressures made them spend more.
Now, we’ve just had to spend more than the entire cost of our wedding just to buy the plane tickets to attend my sister’s big wedding.
Treat it as a nice holiday, but seriously; I wouldn't go into debt to go to my own wedding much less anyone else. If I couldn't afford it I wouldn't go sister or no sister
Have tons of social media accounts where I'm constantly posting pictures of what I'm doing every day. Remember, if it's not photographed and posted online, it didn't happen.
Didn’t see it here so figured I’d share. Live in a city. I was born in a large city, lived there until I was 11. Then moved to the woods. I’ve lived in the woods since then and although I have visited cities since, I could never live there. Too many people, too much noise and I just don’t feel comfortable. I feel more comfortable taking walks at night in the woods than I would in a city.
I lived in San Francisco for most of my adult life (40 of my now 66 years), and my last apartment there was the best one I’d ever had, and I wanted to spend the rest of my life there. Alas, once I was no longer working, I had to move, and after a year (minus two days) of living with my favorite brother and his wife on their farm in rural Oregon, I ended up with a job in a small town on the Mendocino coast of Northern California. I have come to love small-town life in a way I would never have anticipated. I just wish I weren’t so far from my dearest friends, who all live in the Bay Area.
Have never and will never use a dating app.
Sometimes that is the only way people can get to know new people. Haven't used one in a while, but i def would again if i needed to.
This might be oddly specific, it's wearing flip flops.
I grew up in a tourist beach town, I have never owned a pair of flip flops in my life. I find them wildly uncomfortable and people in my hometown look at me like a crazy person when I tell them I don't own a pair.
brushing before breakfast:
doing that is basically wiping before you s**t and i refuse to do that
Buy copious amounts of dishes, Why the f**k do you need 27 plates for the two people in your household. Im looking at you mom.
Do you never have guests over? I also have a dumber reason for it - so I can use my dishwasher. I wouldn't run it for just two or three plates (it's wasting water and energy) and I hate washing dishes, so I have enough to use until the dishwasher is full.
The Hustle Culture. Although I like the idea of bettering your life but always thinking of doing something or the other will leave you with burnout. Taking a break regularly is nessecary
Edit: It's good if you are in a bad place. But it's not always about working your a*s off. What's important is taking a break and keep it from becoming toxic
What does this even mean? To me, hustling means coercing or tricking people into doing something or buying something. I don't think that's generally accepted though is it?
Vaping
Depends which way you look at it. Don't get me wrong I don't think anyone should just take up vaping for the sake of it. However vaping was the one thing that helped me quit cigarettes after many other failed attempts and has done for many other ex-smokers I know. Yes it could be argued that I swapped one addiction for another but weaning myself off the vape was easier than cigarettes by a county mile. Again if you've never smoked then don't start vaping just cos but as a tool to help people quit cigarettes it can be useful.
Sleep around. Meaningless physical touch just grosses me out.
Non native speaker here, what's "sleep around"? I know what sleeping is, but how do you sleep around something or someone?
Making my husband have a man cave. It’s his house too. He shouldn’t just be banished to one room
Upload pictures of yourself online
I dislike having my picture taken. Posting one online is totally out of the question.
I refuse to pay for an autograph of any kind. I've been a book signing or two, but that was because I liked the author. Every famous person I've met has been by total accident.
Eating a*s! I remember when everyone thought it was f*****g disgusting and now people are turned on by eating literal s**t and have their a*s eaten. Can't understand how our evolution has come to this.
Credit card debt… like… why?!?!
Nah, just kidding, I’m American, I have cc debt
The sole reason I use my CC is to get "rewards". The balance is paid monthly. Hopefully, I never have an emergency that will change that.
Climb up the ladder and be the boss. I could but why.
I'll admit I have no interest in getting promoted at work. I experience firsthand how they treat their employees. I could never be the one to beg someone who's in the hospital very sick to "try to make an effort to come in. You're health is not as important as our client's money." F**k that.
sex. the idea makes me uncomfortable and weirded out but if u dont do it then ur weird for being a virgin
You have to make decisions based on your own feelings and values. Nobody—and I really mean zero people—should have sex because of peer-group pressure.
Stand for the national anthem it’s not a political statement. I just don’t like group programmed things just because everyone is doing it I have to. Plus I know the contributions my family has made for the USA.
I hate hymns and flags. I don't and never had this patriotic feeling, to be born in one country or another is an accident and doesn't define me as a person.
Lie out of politeness
If i have to, I would rather just say nothing, point out a separate positive(deflect), or find the best way to not hurt their feelings
Sparing someone the brunt of the truth does not only hurt their development, but its hugely patronizing
I felt this way for a long time, but my partner is the youngest of 5 siblings and the family has never had a wedding or proper family function (outside of casual holidays). Even his parents eloped!
Our initial plan for a small backyard wedding kept growing and growing as logistics got more difficult: renting a tent, tables, chairs, tablecloths, place settings, port-o-potties, building a viable dance floor for the backyard.
With 2 big families, our minimum headcount was higher than we'd like. Annnnd with a bigger headcount, you either pay for a venue or save a mere grand for the stress of building your own venue and dealing with thrice as many vendors 😅
We've still had a ton of reservations about the cost (wedding is in June), but recently learned that some family members on his side are in very poor health and not long for this world.
Soon as we learned that, the cost didn't seem as important as having the first formal family reunion in 75 years.
We've joked straight through that a wedding is not about the couple getting married, and it seems truer than ever. Humbled to provide the opportunity to celebrate with everyone and to get real family portraits.
It definitely isn't the choice for everyone.
Go to bed early like f**k you I still get my 8 hours
It depends on your schedule the morning after. And also, if I'm not mistaken the sleep hormones are released during the night
Do dishes! If it brakes in the dish washer it goes in the trash. (also I dont buy things that dont go in the dish washer)
Register my vehicle on time. The tiniest of tiny protests.
So you’d rather (potentially) be pulled over by the police and/or fined? This one is weird to me.
Businesses bending to please customers no matter what. This whole 'the customer is always right' mentality. It is soul destroying for the workers that have to deal with these kinds of customers and it's about time businesses start standing up for themselves against entitled baby adults who act like it's the end of the world when they have to cover their own return postage costs. Humans should not be treat so badly by other humans while trying to provide them with a service!
Agreed. Be the customer who gets awesome service because you are polite, respectful, and worth helping to have a good outcome.
Load More Replies...Smart phone obsession. I know people who seemingly can't put their phone down for more than a few minutes at a time.
My mother is like that. I have the tendency to forget about the existence of my phone for days at a time though, which isn't really great for communication either.
Load More Replies...I don't have a Twitter account and deleted my Facebook account. I got tired of the constant you need more friends shtick.
This! I didn't delete my accounts but simply stopped logging in at one point without saying anything to anyone (I'm sure there are ppl thinking I'm no longer alive lol). That was several years ago, I haven't regret it a single moment.
Load More Replies...Didn't read the entire list, but to me it seems many were just "getting older and more relaxed and less caring about what other thinks" things. Could also be titled "Things you stop worrying about when you are growing older".
Some of them were definitely like that, others were just pretentious (like the ones that refuse to say "grande" or "venti")
Load More Replies...Use Alexa. Not only are there privacy issues, I do not talk to inanimate objects.
I'd like to say I'm the same, although I did cuss a tree limb when I tripped over it yesterday. Falling, at my age, is not funny. F*****g tree limb.
Load More Replies...Why is wearing tall heels not on this list? I refuse to wear things that causes pain in my feet and cause disfigurement in toes over time. I just don't get it.
I can't believe that wearing high heels is still a thing. They feel horrible and they deform your toes. I haven't worn heels in years and my toes are all perfectly straight and smooth.
Load More Replies...Thinking my way is the only way... I'm so tired of people thinking that what is right to them/for them is right for everyone. Especially now that the government is making decisions for everyone based on their own private/religious beliefs.
I'm of two minds on this. I can see your point of view, for sure, but humans wouldn't have succeeded as a species without cooperation, and without thinking of the group as a whole. We're social animals because alone, we're not that great. We're fragile, we're weak (compared to other animals that are similarly sized), we're slow...if a human and a chimp had a fight, the chimp would eat the human's face off. If 50 humans fought the chimp, they would win. If 49 humans sat back and did nothing while one fought it, then the chimp would win and move on to the next person. And the next. And the next. Now imagine that chimp is covid and you can see why vaccines and masking and social distancing are so important
Load More Replies...People downvoting your comments when they are on subject, then getting a ban because BP refuses to even have a person check first!
Yeah, getting your comments hidden because it's an unpopular opinion is a bummer
Load More Replies...The obsession with hero worshipping the military. It's overdone and ridiculous.
Always having your phone out during concerts. Live in the moment people, why do you need to record a whole darn song and block the view for others?! The amount of phones in the air filming nowadays when the band gets on stage, it's crazy.
That one seems weird to me too - like, you aren't doing a better job of recording the concert than the professional videographers are doing (probably at that same concert), all you'll hear on the phone is the screaming of the people around you (because phone microphones work different than human ears), and all you'll see is a distant blur of lights because the camera can't pick out what the human eye focuses on...it's really just a waste of time
Load More Replies...For me, it's watching gory movies. Like the Saw franchise, or Final Destination, or any other movies where they viscerally show people getting killed. There's something really wrong with a culture that has movie theatres full of people watching human bodies being torn apart, but showing people having sex is still considered to be pretty taboo.
Fvck late-stage capitalism and all of its fans. I refuse to put corporations over humans.
Acting like the customer is always right. Not true AT ALL. The saying is just a way for rude people to manipulate employees and get what they want most times.
Celebrating my birthday or congratulate people on theirs... i absolutelly see no reason.
I don't understand why there are paragraphs on not drinking and not smoking and about dating apps between the numbered points. This website is hard to read.
I never had any interest in downloading TikTok, but my mom always likes sending me TikToks she likes, so I finally downloaded the app just so I can watch what my mom sends me but I just don’t bother with it otherwise 🤷🏼♀️
Taking a cruise ferry. More over taking a car in the ferry so one can drive around. I live in Sweden.for all the ecofriendly people, somehow Swedes think it is their birthright to take those polluting cruises.
Having friends. I don't have friends, I don't want friends. I have my husband a d that's often more social interaction than I can handle or want.
This is a "just do you" post, I like it people shouldn't feel pressured to do thing they just don't want to do
This may not be totally the norm, but using the insanely hard-to-read cApItAl AnD sMaLl letter typing. I HATE it. Please stop it, people!!! I know, I did it there, just for effect so you could see what I meant. 🤬
I get the reasoning for it though - it's meant to denote mockery and sarcasm, which is inherently VERY tricky to get across with the written word. It's meant to be read the way a kid would repeat back something you said to make fun of you: "I said to go clean your room!" "I sAid tO go cLeAn YoUr rOoooOmM"
Load More Replies...I will never drink coffee. I find it equal to alcohol and cigarettes and pot, it's addictive and it irks me that caffeine addiction is so normalized.
I gave up by #7. Nothing on that list is stuff I consider people are "normally" doing anyway. Except the posting their good deeds, which is fine by me. It does no harm, and if it's the only reason someone does a good deed, who cares. The recipient of the deed still receives.
It's the only reason I read this article because it's 100% on the dot. Nobody cares about your pride or your mental illnesses. Just fix yourself and work on building a better family and stop caring what the world thinks.
Load More Replies...The idea that you NEED to respect your parents. They brought you into this world, but you can take yourself out. Not only that, but don't you think the ones WITH EXPERIENCE should be working for the respect, not the other way around? Doing the bare minimum is not earning respect. That's doing your due diligence for bringing a life into this world.
I hate the media-centric displays of who is gay today. I dont care who you do, you do you! I just dont need it taking my news feed. Not my business.
Down voted for SURE. This is SUCH a hetero-centric point of view. Nobody asked for your input. But you know who does care about celebrities coming out? Gay people. People who are still in the closet. People who still have to fear for their LIVES when they consider coming out. People who worry about being attacked, having their lives on the line, for walking or talking "too gay". When gay is normalized, people like me won't have to worry as much. When people like Lil Nas X, Elliott Page, and Kristen Stewart come out, and talk about it, and share it, they are making life immeasurably better for people like them. But sure, they should STFU because it annoys your breeder a*s.
Load More Replies...Having a pet. For me, it doesn't make any sense. Why would you breed and slave an animal, remove all their wild instinct for absolute no use other than serve humans' lack of affection.
Dogs have been domesticated for thousands and thousands of years, humans love companionship - and animals are nonjudgemental and loyal
Load More Replies...Out of all the topics that are glamourized in pop culture and music, you chose to make polygamy your example? Not like, rape, child molestation, murder? Polygamy is your hill to die on? Weird.
Load More Replies...Businesses bending to please customers no matter what. This whole 'the customer is always right' mentality. It is soul destroying for the workers that have to deal with these kinds of customers and it's about time businesses start standing up for themselves against entitled baby adults who act like it's the end of the world when they have to cover their own return postage costs. Humans should not be treat so badly by other humans while trying to provide them with a service!
Agreed. Be the customer who gets awesome service because you are polite, respectful, and worth helping to have a good outcome.
Load More Replies...Smart phone obsession. I know people who seemingly can't put their phone down for more than a few minutes at a time.
My mother is like that. I have the tendency to forget about the existence of my phone for days at a time though, which isn't really great for communication either.
Load More Replies...I don't have a Twitter account and deleted my Facebook account. I got tired of the constant you need more friends shtick.
This! I didn't delete my accounts but simply stopped logging in at one point without saying anything to anyone (I'm sure there are ppl thinking I'm no longer alive lol). That was several years ago, I haven't regret it a single moment.
Load More Replies...Didn't read the entire list, but to me it seems many were just "getting older and more relaxed and less caring about what other thinks" things. Could also be titled "Things you stop worrying about when you are growing older".
Some of them were definitely like that, others were just pretentious (like the ones that refuse to say "grande" or "venti")
Load More Replies...Use Alexa. Not only are there privacy issues, I do not talk to inanimate objects.
I'd like to say I'm the same, although I did cuss a tree limb when I tripped over it yesterday. Falling, at my age, is not funny. F*****g tree limb.
Load More Replies...Why is wearing tall heels not on this list? I refuse to wear things that causes pain in my feet and cause disfigurement in toes over time. I just don't get it.
I can't believe that wearing high heels is still a thing. They feel horrible and they deform your toes. I haven't worn heels in years and my toes are all perfectly straight and smooth.
Load More Replies...Thinking my way is the only way... I'm so tired of people thinking that what is right to them/for them is right for everyone. Especially now that the government is making decisions for everyone based on their own private/religious beliefs.
I'm of two minds on this. I can see your point of view, for sure, but humans wouldn't have succeeded as a species without cooperation, and without thinking of the group as a whole. We're social animals because alone, we're not that great. We're fragile, we're weak (compared to other animals that are similarly sized), we're slow...if a human and a chimp had a fight, the chimp would eat the human's face off. If 50 humans fought the chimp, they would win. If 49 humans sat back and did nothing while one fought it, then the chimp would win and move on to the next person. And the next. And the next. Now imagine that chimp is covid and you can see why vaccines and masking and social distancing are so important
Load More Replies...People downvoting your comments when they are on subject, then getting a ban because BP refuses to even have a person check first!
Yeah, getting your comments hidden because it's an unpopular opinion is a bummer
Load More Replies...The obsession with hero worshipping the military. It's overdone and ridiculous.
Always having your phone out during concerts. Live in the moment people, why do you need to record a whole darn song and block the view for others?! The amount of phones in the air filming nowadays when the band gets on stage, it's crazy.
That one seems weird to me too - like, you aren't doing a better job of recording the concert than the professional videographers are doing (probably at that same concert), all you'll hear on the phone is the screaming of the people around you (because phone microphones work different than human ears), and all you'll see is a distant blur of lights because the camera can't pick out what the human eye focuses on...it's really just a waste of time
Load More Replies...For me, it's watching gory movies. Like the Saw franchise, or Final Destination, or any other movies where they viscerally show people getting killed. There's something really wrong with a culture that has movie theatres full of people watching human bodies being torn apart, but showing people having sex is still considered to be pretty taboo.
Fvck late-stage capitalism and all of its fans. I refuse to put corporations over humans.
Acting like the customer is always right. Not true AT ALL. The saying is just a way for rude people to manipulate employees and get what they want most times.
Celebrating my birthday or congratulate people on theirs... i absolutelly see no reason.
I don't understand why there are paragraphs on not drinking and not smoking and about dating apps between the numbered points. This website is hard to read.
I never had any interest in downloading TikTok, but my mom always likes sending me TikToks she likes, so I finally downloaded the app just so I can watch what my mom sends me but I just don’t bother with it otherwise 🤷🏼♀️
Taking a cruise ferry. More over taking a car in the ferry so one can drive around. I live in Sweden.for all the ecofriendly people, somehow Swedes think it is their birthright to take those polluting cruises.
Having friends. I don't have friends, I don't want friends. I have my husband a d that's often more social interaction than I can handle or want.
This is a "just do you" post, I like it people shouldn't feel pressured to do thing they just don't want to do
This may not be totally the norm, but using the insanely hard-to-read cApItAl AnD sMaLl letter typing. I HATE it. Please stop it, people!!! I know, I did it there, just for effect so you could see what I meant. 🤬
I get the reasoning for it though - it's meant to denote mockery and sarcasm, which is inherently VERY tricky to get across with the written word. It's meant to be read the way a kid would repeat back something you said to make fun of you: "I said to go clean your room!" "I sAid tO go cLeAn YoUr rOoooOmM"
Load More Replies...I will never drink coffee. I find it equal to alcohol and cigarettes and pot, it's addictive and it irks me that caffeine addiction is so normalized.
I gave up by #7. Nothing on that list is stuff I consider people are "normally" doing anyway. Except the posting their good deeds, which is fine by me. It does no harm, and if it's the only reason someone does a good deed, who cares. The recipient of the deed still receives.
It's the only reason I read this article because it's 100% on the dot. Nobody cares about your pride or your mental illnesses. Just fix yourself and work on building a better family and stop caring what the world thinks.
Load More Replies...The idea that you NEED to respect your parents. They brought you into this world, but you can take yourself out. Not only that, but don't you think the ones WITH EXPERIENCE should be working for the respect, not the other way around? Doing the bare minimum is not earning respect. That's doing your due diligence for bringing a life into this world.
I hate the media-centric displays of who is gay today. I dont care who you do, you do you! I just dont need it taking my news feed. Not my business.
Down voted for SURE. This is SUCH a hetero-centric point of view. Nobody asked for your input. But you know who does care about celebrities coming out? Gay people. People who are still in the closet. People who still have to fear for their LIVES when they consider coming out. People who worry about being attacked, having their lives on the line, for walking or talking "too gay". When gay is normalized, people like me won't have to worry as much. When people like Lil Nas X, Elliott Page, and Kristen Stewart come out, and talk about it, and share it, they are making life immeasurably better for people like them. But sure, they should STFU because it annoys your breeder a*s.
Load More Replies...Having a pet. For me, it doesn't make any sense. Why would you breed and slave an animal, remove all their wild instinct for absolute no use other than serve humans' lack of affection.
Dogs have been domesticated for thousands and thousands of years, humans love companionship - and animals are nonjudgemental and loyal
Load More Replies...Out of all the topics that are glamourized in pop culture and music, you chose to make polygamy your example? Not like, rape, child molestation, murder? Polygamy is your hill to die on? Weird.
Load More Replies...