Mom Leaves Her New Baby For 48 Hours To Enjoy A Weekend Away, Hits Back After Getting Slammed For It
Recently, a 33-year-old fitness influencer from the Gold Coast in Australia, Ashy Bines, became the target of backlash online after she left her baby daughter for 48 hours to have a girls’ weekend.
Although Bines’ husband Steve looked after their baby daughter, Tala, and their seven-year-old son, Taj, while she was away, the critics were not shy to slam Bines and share judging comments about her. One private message, according to the influencer, read as follows: “How COULD you leave your baby with Steve for that long? That’s so wrong.”
So Bines shared an inspiring message to all the critics on her Instagram where she boasts a whopping 999K followers. In a post shared five days ago, she explained all the “buts” and “whys” behind her decision to leave Tala for a weekend getaway with friends.
Critics slammed the 33-year-old Aussie fitness guru for leaving her baby to enjoy a weekend with friends, so she responded with a viral message
Image credits: ashybines
Image credits: ashybines
Ashy, who is a mom of two, shared this post with her 999k followers thoroughly explaining her decision
Image credits: ashybines
Image credits: ashybines
Image credits: ashybines
Image credits: ashybines
Bored Panda reached out to Anisa Lewis, a positive parenting and life coach, to find out what a parenting expert had to say about Bines’ now-viral Instagram post. “I love that this mum hasn’t lost herself to being a parent, all too often I work with parents, mums, who have lost their way since having children. Putting the needs of their family, their kids ahead of their own,” Lewis said.
According to the parenting coach, sometimes it happens that “they have forgotten what it means to be themselves, what was their purpose, their passion, what lights them up.” Meanwhile, this mum left her child in the loving care of her father and should be applauded for this, Lewis argues.
“You can’t pour from an empty cup and in this mum’s case, she made the decision that going away with her friends would fill her cup. For other mums, filling their cup will come in other ways, coffee with friends, a chat to a family member, joining an exercise class or taking a mum and baby class. You have to do what is right for you,” Lewis commented.
Having said that, Lewis understands and empathizes that this is not ok for some mums/families and that in itself is ok. “We have to respect everyone’s choice to live differently. Life is about living in tune to your values, to know what you need to make you tick, to recharge your batteries and live your life on your terms,” the parenting expert concluded.
Many people expressed their support for Ashy
I'm confused why people are mad at her. She needed a break, so she went out. The dad is perfectly capable of being the only parent in the house for two days. Why aren't men trusted with babies!? Like he's the father! He knows the baby just as well as the mom does!
What she did is the best way to get a baby’s father on board with caring for a baby who belongs to both of them, too. Had a friend who said when his first child was born, he was one of those guys who refused to do anything like change diapers, bathe, or feed the baby, and no way was he going to get up in the middle of the night to feed them. He and his wife met when they were both in the Army. He had just gotten out, she had about 6 months left. Well, the first weekend after she returned to duty after giving birth, she had to go out on weekend maneuvers and leave him alone with the baby. They were stationed close to her hometown, so he desperately tried to get someone like her mother or sister to stay at the house and take over the childcare. But his wife was smart, clued her relatives in to what he might try, and told them to be busy that weekend. It worked, and he was left alone with his infant. He told me, now if it’s just a couple hours, you can do the minimum and still get yourself off the hook. But NOONE with a shred of decency and humanity is going to leave a baby hungry, not bathed, and laying in a dirty diaper for two whole days. He HAD to step up, and he did. He said he finally grew up and became an adult that weekend, and by the time his wife got home, he was an absolute pro who had his whole childcare routine almost scientifically laid out. From then on, he became an actively involved father to that child, and the other children they had afterward.
Load More Replies...As a man.. Why does it matter which parent tends the children's needs? As long as One of you or Adult relative is present what's the issue? Go Live, You only get One Turn at Life.
Our mother couldn't leave us alone with our father for more than two hours while she went shopping for food on Saturday during the school holidays. In the school terms she did the food shopping in the week while were in school. In the holidays she either dragged us around the supermarket & butchers for the main shop in the week or left us with our father on his time off from work. We were screaming for her to return as he was so rough. When we got older & it wasn't raining she just shoved us out to play alone while she did the shopping. Fathers back then weren't as good with kids as they are now as they didn't get the chance to bond with them at birth. We were on holiday in north Devon once (before it became fashionable) & went walking on Exmoor one day. My mother needed to pee after drinking coffee from a flask & disappeared behind a bush for a few minutes. While she was gone I picked up some sheep droppings & asked my father what they were so he explained & then started pelting us with them. He wouldn't stop despite our protests & the more we asked him to the more he did it. My mother reappeared & told him off.
Load More Replies...Maybe the shade was for the spelling. I "balled" my eyes out???? Really?
Because you have never misspelled a word or used a wrong variation of one?
Load More Replies...Looking back now, I think I suffered from postpartum psychosis, because I felt I could not possibly leave my daughter alone with her father, or with anyone else, because I was terrified she was going to die. I was breastfeeding her so that was another reason why I needed to be with her all the time, at least in my head. I certainly didn't trust anyone else to look after her... Of course I didn't know there was anything wrong with me, at the time.
I think the problem here is posting it on the internet - because most parents figure out the best / safest arrangement, it’s just what people do… but posting it, it takes on all kinds of angles and perspectives that are superficial. So it’s nobody’s business but their own, but if you make it public … stuff happens.
How the f**k is this wrong in any way? Why are mothers always the ones that are required to be there 24/7 when the fathers can usually get away with doing whatever they want? I bet if it was the father going on a 2 day break no one would bat an eyelash. Good on this dad for pulling his weight as a parent and letting the mother have a well deserved break! (I mean, carrying a child for 9 months? Yea, gonna need a break after that!)
It's certainly better than dragging a baby or young children around with you to places they are too young to be in or would find boring. I hate seeing mothers getting together in pubs or coffee shops with pre school or primary school age children bored out of the skulls. Just find some child care for them or leave them with their fathers or grandparents.
Yeah obviously a double standard. Both my parents went to another state for two weeks and left us and my grandparents to watch an infant. Im sure the actual father of the child can manage
If the child has two parents why does it matter which one looks after it?
The only thing I would stop short of is murder if I got the opportunity for 48 hours kid-free right now.
i dont know why people think the dad wouldnt get slammed for leaving the baby, yes absolutely would! people would be crying out "deadbeat!" while sending the mother giftwrapped divorce papers for her to fill out
I have a friend who is a stay-at-home dad (he works from home) and does the childcare for his two small daughters while his wife works out of the home. I think that his children are the better for having the care of their dad. This is crazy. She didn't leave them with strangers; they were with their own father, for cripes sake!
I'm confused why people are mad at her. She needed a break, so she went out. The dad is perfectly capable of being the only parent in the house for two days. Why aren't men trusted with babies!? Like he's the father! He knows the baby just as well as the mom does!
What she did is the best way to get a baby’s father on board with caring for a baby who belongs to both of them, too. Had a friend who said when his first child was born, he was one of those guys who refused to do anything like change diapers, bathe, or feed the baby, and no way was he going to get up in the middle of the night to feed them. He and his wife met when they were both in the Army. He had just gotten out, she had about 6 months left. Well, the first weekend after she returned to duty after giving birth, she had to go out on weekend maneuvers and leave him alone with the baby. They were stationed close to her hometown, so he desperately tried to get someone like her mother or sister to stay at the house and take over the childcare. But his wife was smart, clued her relatives in to what he might try, and told them to be busy that weekend. It worked, and he was left alone with his infant. He told me, now if it’s just a couple hours, you can do the minimum and still get yourself off the hook. But NOONE with a shred of decency and humanity is going to leave a baby hungry, not bathed, and laying in a dirty diaper for two whole days. He HAD to step up, and he did. He said he finally grew up and became an adult that weekend, and by the time his wife got home, he was an absolute pro who had his whole childcare routine almost scientifically laid out. From then on, he became an actively involved father to that child, and the other children they had afterward.
Load More Replies...As a man.. Why does it matter which parent tends the children's needs? As long as One of you or Adult relative is present what's the issue? Go Live, You only get One Turn at Life.
Our mother couldn't leave us alone with our father for more than two hours while she went shopping for food on Saturday during the school holidays. In the school terms she did the food shopping in the week while were in school. In the holidays she either dragged us around the supermarket & butchers for the main shop in the week or left us with our father on his time off from work. We were screaming for her to return as he was so rough. When we got older & it wasn't raining she just shoved us out to play alone while she did the shopping. Fathers back then weren't as good with kids as they are now as they didn't get the chance to bond with them at birth. We were on holiday in north Devon once (before it became fashionable) & went walking on Exmoor one day. My mother needed to pee after drinking coffee from a flask & disappeared behind a bush for a few minutes. While she was gone I picked up some sheep droppings & asked my father what they were so he explained & then started pelting us with them. He wouldn't stop despite our protests & the more we asked him to the more he did it. My mother reappeared & told him off.
Load More Replies...Maybe the shade was for the spelling. I "balled" my eyes out???? Really?
Because you have never misspelled a word or used a wrong variation of one?
Load More Replies...Looking back now, I think I suffered from postpartum psychosis, because I felt I could not possibly leave my daughter alone with her father, or with anyone else, because I was terrified she was going to die. I was breastfeeding her so that was another reason why I needed to be with her all the time, at least in my head. I certainly didn't trust anyone else to look after her... Of course I didn't know there was anything wrong with me, at the time.
I think the problem here is posting it on the internet - because most parents figure out the best / safest arrangement, it’s just what people do… but posting it, it takes on all kinds of angles and perspectives that are superficial. So it’s nobody’s business but their own, but if you make it public … stuff happens.
How the f**k is this wrong in any way? Why are mothers always the ones that are required to be there 24/7 when the fathers can usually get away with doing whatever they want? I bet if it was the father going on a 2 day break no one would bat an eyelash. Good on this dad for pulling his weight as a parent and letting the mother have a well deserved break! (I mean, carrying a child for 9 months? Yea, gonna need a break after that!)
It's certainly better than dragging a baby or young children around with you to places they are too young to be in or would find boring. I hate seeing mothers getting together in pubs or coffee shops with pre school or primary school age children bored out of the skulls. Just find some child care for them or leave them with their fathers or grandparents.
Yeah obviously a double standard. Both my parents went to another state for two weeks and left us and my grandparents to watch an infant. Im sure the actual father of the child can manage
If the child has two parents why does it matter which one looks after it?
The only thing I would stop short of is murder if I got the opportunity for 48 hours kid-free right now.
i dont know why people think the dad wouldnt get slammed for leaving the baby, yes absolutely would! people would be crying out "deadbeat!" while sending the mother giftwrapped divorce papers for her to fill out
I have a friend who is a stay-at-home dad (he works from home) and does the childcare for his two small daughters while his wife works out of the home. I think that his children are the better for having the care of their dad. This is crazy. She didn't leave them with strangers; they were with their own father, for cripes sake!
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