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Guy Embarrassed GF Didn’t Clean Up For His Parents’ Visit, Gets A Reality Check Online
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Guy Embarrassed GF Didn’t Clean Up For His Parents’ Visit, Gets A Reality Check Online

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An unfortunate part of many relationships is managing the cold war between your partner and your parents. What side to take, when to fight, when to make peace are all questions that do not really have simple answers.

So a man turned to the internet for advice when he sided with his mother over his GF when she commented that their home was dirty. He decided to agree with her that it was his GF’s fault and seemed somewhat confused as to why she would be offended by this idea. Netizens did not hold back about who was actually at fault.

The question of who cleans what is a common pitfall in many relationships

Image credits: Prostock-studio (not the actual photo)

But one man ended up in hot water with his GF when he blamed her for the home being dirty

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Image credits: YuriArcursPeopleimages (not the actual photo)

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Image source: Blueberry_Knoll_6340

Navigating family and relationship drama can be hard

In the young couple’s defense, some mothers are overly critical of cleanliness just for the sake of causing drama. Others have a massively inflated sense of how clean something should be. Many of us have gone through the experience of having houseguests and needing to clean our rooms for some reason as if they would all be having dinner next to our childhood beds.

This isn’t to say that OP’s place should have been dirty and that being a slob is actually normal and acceptable, but without real evidence of just how dirty the home was, it’s hard to judge. However, what is easier to judge is OP just siding against his GF without a moment of hesitation.

Let’s face it, calling out your parents may not be the easiest thing to do in the world, but OP is a grown, adult man. Not only does he not take any responsibility for the state of the apartment, where he does seem to spend more of his time, but he also does not even attempt to take a shred of the blame for himself.

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People have very wide standards of what is and isn’t considered clean

Regardless of how actually made a larger part of the mess (a completely academic exercise, as we will never know,) OP’s parents are OP’s guests, so he should have done his part to clean up in advance. The fact that he didn’t even notice that something was dirty does create an interesting argument for who is to blame.

Because, at this point, OP could have perhaps argued that his parents were overreacting. As one comment noted, they were the ones getting free lodgings and taking the time to criticize their hosts. Instead of standing his ground, OP simply agreed that his parents were right and that he was living in filth.

While we do not know just how dirty the home was, the words OP’s mother used were “not fit for guests,” which likely means a bit more than some dusty surfaces. At the same time, OP states that he basically didn’t notice. So we have two possible answers, that OP has very low standards of cleanliness or that his parents are simply too demanding. In both cases, throwing the GF under the bus is the wrong move.

OP needs to treat this as a learning experience

As one can probably guess, readers were not particularly sympathetic to OP. While it is entirely possible that his parents were being demanding, ungrateful, and annoying (in a worst-case scenario reading of the situation) this still doesn’t justify him eating it up and passing the blame. He says his mother was just trying to help, which seems like a very generous spin on her actions.

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For example, why didn’t she actually help and perhaps clean? She is the one getting free lodging, after all. Let us hope that this was a wake-up call for OP and it should allow him to better understand his relationship with his family, his girlfriend, and, hopefully, a vacuum and a mop.

Most people thought he was absolutely in the wrong

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Justin Sandberg

Justin Sandberg

Writer, BoredPanda staff

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I am a writer at Bored Panda. Despite being born in the US, I ended up spending most of my life in Europe, from Latvia, Austria, and Georgia to finally settling in Lithuania. At Bored Panda, you’ll find me covering topics ranging from the cat meme of the day to red flags in the workplace and really anything else. In my free time, I enjoy hiking, beating other people at board games, cooking, good books, and bad films.

Read less »
Justin Sandberg

Justin Sandberg

Writer, BoredPanda staff

I am a writer at Bored Panda. Despite being born in the US, I ended up spending most of my life in Europe, from Latvia, Austria, and Georgia to finally settling in Lithuania. At Bored Panda, you’ll find me covering topics ranging from the cat meme of the day to red flags in the workplace and really anything else. In my free time, I enjoy hiking, beating other people at board games, cooking, good books, and bad films.

Kotryna Br

Kotryna Br

Author, BoredPanda staff

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Kotryna is a Photo Editor at Bored Panda with a BA in Graphic Design. Before Bored Panda, she worked as a freelance graphic designer and illiustrator. When not editing, she enjoys working with clay, drawing, playing board games and drinking good tea.

Read less »

Kotryna Br

Kotryna Br

Author, BoredPanda staff

Kotryna is a Photo Editor at Bored Panda with a BA in Graphic Design. Before Bored Panda, she worked as a freelance graphic designer and illiustrator. When not editing, she enjoys working with clay, drawing, playing board games and drinking good tea.

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jaredrobinson avatar
Jared Robinson
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ahhhh the responses were very satisfying. Man'll need to go to the burn unit after reading these

awdudeno avatar
Jane Doe
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Too bad it's GF who works for the fire brigade. She is sitting back watching his whiny a*s go up in flames. [my mom] was just trying to help [my GF learn her place]

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janembull avatar
MonsterMum
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Even if the house was filthy the parents should keep their mouths shut. Different people have different standards, if you don't like it, don't stay there.

feuerrabe avatar
VioletHunter
Community Member
5 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think it's fine for friends and close family to say something but the mother directing all of it in detail to the girlfriend as if she were the maid? That's rude.

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ileanaskyaviles avatar
Star Anäis
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why was his mother also pointing it out to HER! Why not him! And he was embarrassed the house was not up to standards because of her?? The audacity of this guy. He expected her to clean since she was off Friday, I doubt he even asked her politely to help prepare the home. She needs to leave. AH.

moxiegraphix avatar
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jaredrobinson avatar
Jared Robinson
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Ahhhh the responses were very satisfying. Man'll need to go to the burn unit after reading these

awdudeno avatar
Jane Doe
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Too bad it's GF who works for the fire brigade. She is sitting back watching his whiny a*s go up in flames. [my mom] was just trying to help [my GF learn her place]

Load More Replies...
janembull avatar
MonsterMum
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Even if the house was filthy the parents should keep their mouths shut. Different people have different standards, if you don't like it, don't stay there.

feuerrabe avatar
VioletHunter
Community Member
5 months ago (edited) DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

I think it's fine for friends and close family to say something but the mother directing all of it in detail to the girlfriend as if she were the maid? That's rude.

Load More Replies...
ileanaskyaviles avatar
Star Anäis
Community Member
5 months ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Why was his mother also pointing it out to HER! Why not him! And he was embarrassed the house was not up to standards because of her?? The audacity of this guy. He expected her to clean since she was off Friday, I doubt he even asked her politely to help prepare the home. She needs to leave. AH.

moxiegraphix avatar
Load More Comments
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