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“They’re Not Savages”: In-Laws Refuse To Eat Woman’s Cooking, Regret It
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Woman Refuses To Accept Mistreatment From In-Laws, Gets Blamed For Ruining Dinner

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It’s safe to say that no two people are exactly the same when it comes to food. That’s why there’s no need to eat something if one doesn’t feel like it, but there’s no need to make fun of it, either.

This redditor’s in-laws checked both boxes when they refused to eat her Middle Eastern dish, saying that they’re “not savages”. And even though they changed their minds later, the line was already crossed.

Some traditional cuisines might be unusual to those outside of the culture

Image credits: Pressmaster/Envato elements (not the actual photo)

This woman refused to share her food after her in-laws made fun of it

Image credits: CharmaineZoe’s Marvelous Melange/ Flickr (not the actual photo)

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Image credits: Bada**frau

Intercultural couples are not immune to troubles with the in-laws

Image credits: Mikhail Nilov/Pexels (not the actual photo)

Making fun of any aspect of a person’s life rarely makes the relationship any better, but it’s especially unlikely when it’s their customs or culture that’s being mocked. Whether it’s a backhanded compliment, a hurtful remark, or a plain direct insult, it can make the person on the receiving end understandably upset and result in other detrimental outcomes, such as a broken family relationship.

Uncalled for comments like the one in the OP’s story are damaging for many reasons, and make life needlessly difficult for expats who might be already faced with all sorts of challenges of living in a foreign country. According to surveys carried out by Aetna International, the main one is missing home, family and friends, followed by difficulties regarding employment, cost of living, and cultural differences respectively.

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The latter is unsurprisingly a significant influence in people’s romantic relationships. A study on challenges individuals within intercultural marriages face found that the main ones relate to five aspects – family, finances, communication, time spent together, and clashes in cultural expectations and traditions, the first of which often includes troublesome situations with the in-laws.

One example of such situations is having to deal with in-laws who are seemingly too involved in a couple’s life. “One issue with in-laws might stem from what is perceived to be an invasion of the couple’s privacy. However, such privacy boundaries are culturally determined; what might seem intrusive in one culture is perceived as perfectly normal in another,” the study read in part.

The challenges people within intercultural marriages face only seem to make them closer

Image credits: fauxels/ Pexels (not the actual photo)

The aforementioned study found that the majority of challenges people within intercultural marriages faced were consistently managed by partners keeping an open mind and focusing on improving communication. The couples reported that such strategies have not only helped them to deal with said challenges but also made them feel closer and more satisfied with their relationship.

Statistics show that an increasing number of couples seemingly face the challenges and reap the benefits of being in an intercultural relationship. In the US, for instance, the number of such couples has been growing steadily for more than five decades, going from comprising roughly 3% of all newlyweds back in 1967 to 17% in 2015, Pew Research Center reports. In Germany, where the OP’s husband’s family was from, there were reportedly close to 23,000 intercultural marriages between a male German and a female foreigner back in 2022.

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The redditor shared that her husband has always stood up for her during any troublesome occurrences with his family. But in the update she revealed that she wanted to do the talking herself after the incident with the lamb roast. Fellow redditors in the comments showed their support for the woman and believed she wasn’t being a jerk to her in-laws.

Fellow netizens didn’t think she was a jerk in the situation, the woman replied to some of their comments

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Miglė Miliūtė

Miglė Miliūtė

Writer, BoredPanda staff

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A writer here at Bored Panda, I am a lover of good music, good food, and good company, which makes food-related topics and feel-good stories my favorite ones to cover. Passionate about traveling and concerts, I constantly seek occasions to visit places yet personally unexplored. I also enjoy spending free time outdoors, trying out different sports—even if I don’t look too graceful at it—or socializing over a cup of coffee.

Read less »
Miglė Miliūtė

Miglė Miliūtė

Writer, BoredPanda staff

A writer here at Bored Panda, I am a lover of good music, good food, and good company, which makes food-related topics and feel-good stories my favorite ones to cover. Passionate about traveling and concerts, I constantly seek occasions to visit places yet personally unexplored. I also enjoy spending free time outdoors, trying out different sports—even if I don’t look too graceful at it—or socializing over a cup of coffee.

Ilona Baliūnaitė

Ilona Baliūnaitė

Author, BoredPanda staff

Read more »

I'm a Visual Editor at Bored Panda since 2017. I've searched through a multitude of images to create over 2000 diverse posts on a wide range of topics. I love memes, funny, and cute stuff, but I'm also into social issues topics. Despite my background in communication, my heart belongs to visual media, especially photography. When I'm not at my desk, you're likely to find me in the streets with my camera, checking out cool exhibitions, watching a movie at the cinema or just chilling with a coffee in a cozy place

Read less »

Ilona Baliūnaitė

Ilona Baliūnaitė

Author, BoredPanda staff

I'm a Visual Editor at Bored Panda since 2017. I've searched through a multitude of images to create over 2000 diverse posts on a wide range of topics. I love memes, funny, and cute stuff, but I'm also into social issues topics. Despite my background in communication, my heart belongs to visual media, especially photography. When I'm not at my desk, you're likely to find me in the streets with my camera, checking out cool exhibitions, watching a movie at the cinema or just chilling with a coffee in a cozy place

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rhodaguirreparras avatar
Pittsburgh rare
Community Member
2 weeks ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's funny how casually racist some people are when it comes to food. The same ones who would be clutching their pearls at any other type of comments.

swarren07 avatar
ShellsBells
Community Member
2 weeks ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Totally not defending the MIL, but I can understand people being against something they are unfamiliar with. I took Cultural Athropology in college, the first thing the professor had us discuss was people eating fish and rice for breakfast. Many said, "eewww," and "gross." Even being in Hawai'i. Now she asked about "fried chicken embryos, fried pig skin." Same response. But eggs and bacon sound different. It's about perception. My roommate in Hawai'i took myself and my visiting friends to a Japanese restaurant. Had us try some meat. Wouldn't tell us what. It was the most flavorful and tender piece of meat I have ever had. What was it? Gyutan. Cow tongue. I never would have tried if I knew what it was. I've tried many things, but tongue was an odd one to me then, but not now. But I would never insult someone the way the MIL did, she should have been thankful for being invited to dinner and experience her DILs culture. I would love to try her sheep's neck.

Load More Replies...
gusgallifrey avatar
Gustav Gallifrey
Community Member
2 weeks ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Middle eastern/Mediterranean people REALLY know how to do lamb. Never had a lamb dish cooked according to that region's methods that wasn't heavenly.

zedrapazia avatar
Zedrapazia
Community Member
2 weeks ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What a double standard, things such as ox tails and lamb necks aren't even uncommon in the German kitchen either. Heavens, I had an ox tails soup last week, these people are just pretentious, trying to be better than the so called "savage".

Load More Comments
rhodaguirreparras avatar
Pittsburgh rare
Community Member
2 weeks ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

It's funny how casually racist some people are when it comes to food. The same ones who would be clutching their pearls at any other type of comments.

swarren07 avatar
ShellsBells
Community Member
2 weeks ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Totally not defending the MIL, but I can understand people being against something they are unfamiliar with. I took Cultural Athropology in college, the first thing the professor had us discuss was people eating fish and rice for breakfast. Many said, "eewww," and "gross." Even being in Hawai'i. Now she asked about "fried chicken embryos, fried pig skin." Same response. But eggs and bacon sound different. It's about perception. My roommate in Hawai'i took myself and my visiting friends to a Japanese restaurant. Had us try some meat. Wouldn't tell us what. It was the most flavorful and tender piece of meat I have ever had. What was it? Gyutan. Cow tongue. I never would have tried if I knew what it was. I've tried many things, but tongue was an odd one to me then, but not now. But I would never insult someone the way the MIL did, she should have been thankful for being invited to dinner and experience her DILs culture. I would love to try her sheep's neck.

Load More Replies...
gusgallifrey avatar
Gustav Gallifrey
Community Member
2 weeks ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Middle eastern/Mediterranean people REALLY know how to do lamb. Never had a lamb dish cooked according to that region's methods that wasn't heavenly.

zedrapazia avatar
Zedrapazia
Community Member
2 weeks ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

What a double standard, things such as ox tails and lamb necks aren't even uncommon in the German kitchen either. Heavens, I had an ox tails soup last week, these people are just pretentious, trying to be better than the so called "savage".

Load More Comments
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