Grief, anger, acceptance, art: my journey as an autism parent has been and continues to be full of winding turns and hills and valleys.
I love my son unconditionally, as the beautiful, hilarious, challenging, and charming person he is. I worry endlessly about his future, though, and there are days when it's hard for us to like each other (though the love never goes away).
To me, the greatest gift of his autism isn't his math wizardry or perfect pitch; it's the unique and poetic way he looks at the world. In my photography, I wanted to create a tribute to that perspective and the reality of our day-to-day life.
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The Other You, The One Who Sees Me
In this reflection image, my son is looking right at me. That's something he never does. Somehow, the barrier of the glass wall let him see me. I often sometimes think wistfully about this version of him, the one behind the glass. I love him the way he is, but I'd give anything to embrace the boy behind the barrier.
To the mother that took these beautiful pictures. I'm autistic myself, and I love photography... and when I look at these pictures. I see that your son loves you. :)
Dear Kate, No needs for words when images tell a story like the one in your photos. The love you feel for your son can be seen in every one of the photos you shared. Thank you. <3
The caption of this picture makes me sad. It is something autistic and so many other "special needs" children have to suffer all their life. The knowledge that their parents secretly (or not so secretly) wishes they were someone else and often would be all to happy if they vanished and were replaced by someone who was not "broken" in the way society values it. By claiming that you would "give anything" to embrace the boy behind the barrier", you are at the same time saying that he is not enough.
He Hears The Grasses Whisper
One of the core characteristics of autism is differences in sensory processing. The world can be overwhelming with so many sounds and sights and smells. But this can be a gift too; my son experiences the world in a way I never will.
He looks so peaceful... what he has been given opens him up to a whole new world.
Winter Dream
I often feel like there is something separating my son and me. We can see and hear each other through this barrier, but we can't quite touch. Here, I photographed him through a sheet of ice to symbolize that experience.
Focus
One of my son's great gifts is his ability to focus completely on something. A puzzle, a musical instrument, the way the light makes colors in the clouds... He can put all of himself into what he loves, and I try to do the same in my interactions with him.
Beautifull!!!! I am glad that you use pictures to show that autism isn't a scary weird thing but in fact a gift!!!! I should know because I am autistic.
Thank you! It means a lot that you like them.
Load More Replies...Head Under His Wing
Photographing someone with autism isn't always easy, but that's because a good portrait is about emotional connection. To connect with someone on the spectrum, it helps to enter his world. Here, he's pretending to be an owl, and owls are his current area of special interest.
Kate, you took great photos! they are perfectly beautiful. Best wishes to him and you!
In There
Spectrum
Sleepy Morning
School Day Sunrise
Winter Is Here
Something Between Us
Loving The Shadow You
Some days are very, very hard. On off days, I start the morning with my son yelling that he hates me. The truth is, sometimes I drop him off at school and try not to squeal my tires as I drive away. I feel like a failure as a mother on those days, but I also know that those are the days that prove my love for him.
It's hard for us autistic kids/teens. It feels like we hear only bits of what the world is telling us. There is a cloud that confuses us. The few bits that we understand in this world feels like out safety line. Have you ever thought of doing ABA services?? And you are not a failure as a mother. In fact you are one of the greatest moms with a autistic child.
Rough Morning
Yes, sensory issues can definitely have an impact! Unfortunately, that's just not always the cause. Like many parents of kids on the spectrum, we've charted every variable from food dye to barometric pressure. We'll know what causes off days someday, but in the meantime, we all just have to do our best.
Load More Replies...Sidelong Pickerel Smile
Absolutely beautiful,! Your kid, you and your relationship. You have helped me understand the art behind this. Beautiful! Bless you and you son.
After School
You And Me, Bugaboo
My son and I have a solid but very dramatic relationship. I make him really angry with my efforts to get him to school on time or have him eat something different for dinner. But I'm there for him, even when we're mad at each other. I think, I hope, he knows that.
Tree Curl
When Everything Goes Quiet....
Thank you for your ability and willingness to capture and share such an intimate portrait of your experiences and dedication to your beautiful son. Your art opens my eyes to the beauty you both see in this world and his fascination with even the simplest of things is a wonderful reminder to stop and enjoy the things in life we overlook and take for granted otherwise.
Amazing work, really. Touching, intimate, honest... I think besides your photos capture your son's approach to life it also shows your biggest love to him, your devotion, your commitment to your motherhood role. He's a lucky guy so are you. Keep going, breathe. Let you learn everyday from him, and please keep capturing this images.
Kate your pictures moved me to tears, I have a son that has autistic spectrum, and could relate with each of your beautiful portraits, thank you!
Beautiful and thoughtful pictures. "Spectrum" is great not only as a portrait, but also as the wordplay; the one in which he looks directly at you through his reflection is truly amazing. Great job, great son and great mom!
Thank you for your ability and willingness to capture and share such an intimate portrait of your experiences and dedication to your beautiful son. Your art opens my eyes to the beauty you both see in this world and his fascination with even the simplest of things is a wonderful reminder to stop and enjoy the things in life we overlook and take for granted otherwise.
Amazing work, really. Touching, intimate, honest... I think besides your photos capture your son's approach to life it also shows your biggest love to him, your devotion, your commitment to your motherhood role. He's a lucky guy so are you. Keep going, breathe. Let you learn everyday from him, and please keep capturing this images.
Kate your pictures moved me to tears, I have a son that has autistic spectrum, and could relate with each of your beautiful portraits, thank you!
Beautiful and thoughtful pictures. "Spectrum" is great not only as a portrait, but also as the wordplay; the one in which he looks directly at you through his reflection is truly amazing. Great job, great son and great mom!
