I’m a plus sized teenage girl and my grandmother visits almost every other month, and every time she always tells me to go take a walk or to eat some vegetables. She also gives me dirty looks when I get a second plate of food. I eat healthy and exercise even when she isn’t visiting. Last time she visited I just told her that I wasn’t taking suggestions on what to do with my body and that she could leave me alone. She said that she was “just wanting the best” for me. That’s when I lashed out. “My body isn’t yours for the Gods sake! I’m not skinny like you, get over yourself!” I had yelled. She told me that it was downright disrespectful to talk to her like that. AITA?
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NTA! Respect works both ways. As a plus size person myself, this behaviour is far more detrimental to your health, both mentally and physically. Each time you see her, your body goes into high alert, it’s just not helpful. Not to mention is bloody hurtful, whether she thinks it’s for your good or not. Love to you hun xx
NTA, your grandmother thinks she is "helping" but she is not. Does she have something about herself she doesn't like, if she does bring it up every time you see her. If she doesn't then make her feel just as uncomfortable by saying something like "Wow that is a big dark hair on your chin!"
I am very b!tchy and I like to be passive-aggressive to others when they are to me. If you want to be nicer you can just tell her that you are still growing into your body and her comments are not wanted or needed. Although most "Elders" want to think they are helping you should tell her she is being toxic and that her comments are hurtful. If she can't be respectful you do not need to be respectful to her. Also feel free to explain that respect is two ways just like stated in an above post.
“It is not what you say, but how you say it.” That was my mother’s explanation for calling my words “sass.” You “lashed out” and “yelled.” It is not appropriate to speak to your grandmother that way though she should not judge you for your size. Appeal to her to understand that you are able to determine your lifestyle choices without assistance. By remaining calm and respectful, you demonstrate your maturity.
Ehhh NTA, while she shouldn’t be judging based off of body size (you do you,) I also think that it was a little irrational and “in the heat of the moment” to downright yell. Either way NTA.
