Woman Shares Boyfriend’s Body Shaming Texts On Twitter Asking What To Do, Dumps Him With Internet’s Help
Being made to feel bad or guilty about your body image is a horrible experience in any circumstances, but when the person doing it is the one who is supposed to love and support you, it can feel like a dagger through the heart.
This was the case recently for Shelby Johnson, who actually had a history of being underweight. It was, therefore, a victory of sorts for her to reach a healthy weight of 120lbs. Unfortunately, her boyfriend did not share the same onlook on beauty standards.
Shelby took to Twitter for advice after receiving bizarre and disrespectful criticism from her so-called beloved, sharing text messages in which he made some quite horrifying observations about her, including a weird obsession about her gut sticking out more than his. Because a “beer gut” is perfectly acceptable for a man, but is body shaming-worthy for a woman apparently.
“Am I overreacting for feeling hurt by this? I’m at a loss and just can’t even comprehend how someone who claims to love me can say this,” she wrote. Because really, does a person fall in love with a face and body? Or is it the mind, spirit, and personality where we make that connection?
Her tweet quickly went viral, with Shelby receiving an outpouring of love, support, and advice from thousands of people. Including people urging her to “dump his ass” and low-key public shaming him.
Scroll down below to check out how it unfolded for yourself and let us know what you think in the comments. Did she do the right thing by unveiling the rude people among us? Join the discussion!
Shelby Johnson had a relationship crisis recently
And it started with her boyfriend’s texts about her weight
Comments came pouring in
Shelby felt empowered after the support she received
Here are some reactions to Shelby’s decision
952Kviews
Share on FacebookShe looks fine to me. I'm more worried with her need for attention...Why does she have to share this with the world!?
she was questioning whether what he was saying was ok or not. Sometimes you need an outside 3rd party to put things into perspective
Load More Replies...She looks fine. What I don't get is why she would publicly post her pictures in lingerie... Especially the second one in the 4-pieces series... I mean, it's not offensive or anything, I guess I just admire her courage, cause I think some things should stay private. And you can show your beer gut or the lack of it in other clothes than those ;)
She's posting them because of the same reason she posted all of it - attention.
Load More Replies...ahhh.....the approval of the anonymous masses is the balm for a fragile self image
She's just desperate for attention and he is absolutely right about her beer gut. He should have dumped her instantly after she posted private messages. He only told her privately about it and she is the one shaming him on the internet. Why should he not tell her about it? Should he wait till he doesn't find her attractive anymore and then tell her?
This is why you need real-life face-to-face friends. You discuss this stuff with them instead of putting everyone's dirty laundry out into the public. She did have a right to ask others if her feelings were rational, but she should have spoken to a close friend or a family member IN PERSON.
Load More Replies...Who take thousands of pictures of himself in the bathrooms or anywhere ? Narcissic people. Instead of looking for attention based in your ugly or beautiful body (anyway), be smart, be interesting. You deserve what is happening. You are narcissic, you are with someone based on apparence. Today, even you are the same, your body change, your narcissic behaviour is against you now. Grow up.
Maybe vain people just like showing off their toilets ;)
Load More Replies...How the hell do so many people feel comfortable to break up a couple and advise her to dump him?!?!? Yes, his attitude towards her figure is wrong and he should appreciate what he has because she looks fine just the way she is, but to assume he is a total a*****e, unfit to be her partner is not right either. People make mistakes and he was honest with her... my point is that based only on that knowledge about their relationship, people shouldn't interfere and break them up!
Also, I now realize the irony of me commenting on this post while my nickname here is a relationship reference of Ross haha
Load More Replies...Attention seeking to be honest, why do people love to live their lives on social media and create drama so they can draw in compliments?
I think body shaming is wrong but I'm not so sure about this, the guy was honest and stated how he felt about her body, yeah he should have just left her if he had a problem but being young he's probably just very ignorant and does not know that you under no circumstances should you ask a woman to lose weight.
Why tho? No one is making a fuss about women who ask men to lose some weight or to build up some muscles. There is also no one making a fuss about men asking a women to gain some weight. But when it comes to asking a women to even just stop gaining weight, everyone is instantly triggered. Why should he just leave her, if he probably loves her, but fears to not find her attractive anymore in the future if she keeps gaining weight?
Load More Replies...I often think these things are just made up for Attention on social media, because everyone seems to want their 15 minutes of Victimhood, but, this seems real. She should have dumped his @ss immediately, before dropping this on the web.
What happend with talking and discussion between people? I guess it is easier to dump someone than talk with them sincerely about things that bother you...
I mean, who feels bad for this girl (if this is even REAL). She's a narcissist who posted private conversations in order to shame her boyfriend using strangers who don't honestly care about her. Its the flavor of the day to value the opinion of avatars and freely give hollow encouraging messages to those you don't genuinely give a s**t about. She's not even fat, she just wants attention and validation.
It's funny how a woman would leave a guy promptly if he lost his high paying job but when a guy is no longer attracted to his girl for putting on weight they find it unacceptable. Men and women are attracted to different things. Some men might not mind extra weight as would some women stick by thier man if something they were initially attracted to them for has now disappeared. I just think it's unfair to judge the guy.
Whenever I've heard of a woman leaving a guy for monetary reasons like that, the story was always told with disapproval and sympathy for the guy. I don't think treating that like an acceptable reason is at all standard for whichever way.
Load More Replies...Scales are misleading, especially when you are already at a healthy weight. Wasn't there an article on here awhile ago showing people who'd exercised to improve their looks and actually gained weight but because of increased muscle tone they looked better. She's at that area - a healthy weight. If it really bothers her then doing some cardio to firm up and increase muscle mass will help, but she may end up weighing 130 once that's done. Muscle is heavier than fat tissue after all. But it must be her decision and no one else's to do that. The only people who need to lose weight are fat asses like me where it's a medical issue.
It's just a feminist article barely disguised to denounce the pseudo-victimization and the terrible suffering of girls against men. This kind of nonsense should not interfere here.
And she ASKED for his opinion! Is this the state of the feminist mindset?! Shower me with hollow validation or you're literally attacking me?!
Load More Replies...Weird, just weird that they have this conversation vias text and get random twitter people involved,. Just weird. This should of been a private conversation face to face.. s**t liek that can excalate via text messages as there note tone to a text. maybe an emogi, but really wtf does that do. Just strange, maybe i should post my toe nail on the internet , my wife says it get too long,,, 'look world ; what's your recommendation for my toenail, because I have such insecurity issues i need to share this s**t with you and have approval from strangers on the other side of the world to reassure my insecurities ' Just weird ...
I think he was inconsiderate but it wasn't a good reason to dump him immediately. I think she is insecure and has a lot of body image issues. They could possibly have worked through this if they were both willing to talk.
Tbh the internet is a judgemental and cancerous place at times and they should have just sorted out this little argument by themselves instead of letting random people decide what she should do with her life... maybe he was a brilliant boyfriend, maybe he was just casually mentioning he'd like her to lose some weight, we don't know the context to this... posting it on the internet was one of the worst moves she could have done in mu opinion, and even if she was going to leave him, probably led to a lot of uninformed and strong opinions.
3.500.000.000.000 people live right now on this planet, and one has a problem with her weight? haha hehe
Frankly, I think she looked best in the second pic...later on, she WAS putting on the pounds...just sayin'.
There's a fundamental piece of this conversation missing. Did HE text her about it or did SHE ask? If she asked I see NOTHING wrong with this. He even says he's attracted to her and she's gaining some weight. 5lbs may seem like a little, but muscle takes up about half the space, so if she's letting her whole body go due to drinking, she may (and does) look like she IS gaining weight. He is sweet and says he's still attracted to her and is just worried if she lets herself go more. He seems concerned, not body shaming. But, once again, I think we all really need to see where this conversation started. I gained about 20lbs (I believe due to my IUD) and I was depressed. I kept whining about and asking my boyfriend and he finally said that if it upset me so much, I should go to the gym more and I have and i'm looking so much better every week. If she asked and she's posting underwear photos everywhere, she can't be mad at a man that's brave enough to be HONEST. Many of us women like that!
don't.post.half-naked.pictures.online. And the guy came to his sense in the end, give him a break too
It does seem insensitive of the boyfriend ,but am I the only one who thought he was trying to tell her she's putting on weight out of concern? From the pictures , she is gaining quickly and it's all the dangerous belly fat that leads to higher risk of heart disease and all sorts if other problems in women. Considering she had issues with her weight before , bf may have thought he was helping . He even states it doesn't bother him and he's still attracted to her. Could it be just a really bad way of bringing up a personal issue? He seemed so understanding of his actions in the end.
I understand why she did this had the same experience with my Father. Had to fight to keep weight on all my life I only hit over 8 st (112lbs) when I was pregnant. I finally maintained 112lbs for 6 months with out been pregnant and felt amazing. Told my Dad celebrating he'd seen me battle to maintain a healthy weight since I was a teenager his first word to me where " You need to go on a diet you will get fat" that was it his only comment. I cried for hours took all the joy out of my achievement and fight a piece of me ws destroyed that day. The cruelness in his comment made me feel he only wanted a skinny ill looking daughter piece of me died that day. When ever I get on scales I hear his words.
She wasn't with the right guy obviously but why do people ask for an opinion from others and then get offended when an opinion is given? Everyone has a right to say what they feel, especially when asked.
The internet has become a crazy place where people dump their personal problems (with pictures, preferably showing some flesh!) and seek attention. And if somebody looks fine but is steadily gaining weight, it's the partner or a friend to point it out as at some point it leads to obesity and it's not "fine" anymore. Too many people want to cure their insecurities on the internet. If someone is happy with themselves, they do not seek on the internet confirmation they're fine.
To be honest, I think physical attraction is just as important as being attracted to a person's personality. She looks great and definitely not overweight, but if the guy's not attracted to that kind of body type that's fine imo. What's not fine is shaming her into losing weight. Might be best to break up with him and find someone who would appreciate her as she is.
He didn't even shamed her into losing weight. He asked her to stop gaining.
Load More Replies...What is he talking about? You look AMAZING. Not overweight at all, dodged a bullet with that one, girl. I don't even see a beer belly.
well, she does not look AMAZING according to him and he can have his own opinion, don't you think? She asked, he answered. If he does not find her AMAZING, he should have lied about it?
Load More Replies...You asked his opinion- he was honest and gave it to you... Now, he said he still likes you. Some people care a lot about visual apperence- but at least he is honest!
Don't ask a question to a loved one if u can't handle the trueth , my wife said she thought the girl was Prego. Everyone says they want honesty in a relationship yet they cry when they hit with the trueth.ever want to know the trueth so a 5-10 yr old they brutally honest
Body shaming would be trying to make someone ashame of the appearance of his/her body, because of your own standards (which depends on a lot of things like time and place, for example at some point in western Europe chubby women with White skin were considered sexy, today it's usually skinny and tanned). Simple as that. I put health issues aside. You don't tell someone show To dress? Don't tell him/her what his appearence should be. It's very subjective, it can be hurtful, and as I said, is it really what matters more in a relationship? It's very probable that in 20/30 years your opinion on appearance will have changed, just as your body. What you find so important today will have disappeared, but a deep relationship will still be here.
Gah this was supposed to be an answer to roman pintus, I guess I still don't know how to correctly use the comment section 😅😅😅😅
Load More Replies...This dude will be kicking himself for the way he acted. Girl is gorgeous.
A good partner helps you to live healthy and does everything to make you happy! everything else is b******t!!! good partnership starts with healthy and happy life!
People with healthy body think they are overweight. People with serious overweight think they are "healthy". I just can't get it.
It has nothing to do with weight or size. It's their body perception. Unfortunately, people with eating didorders have a distorted body perception.
Load More Replies...i feel for you - i am criticised for being haggard skinny and horrible after losing weight due to illness
I am super skinny and people make annoying jokes about my body. So, I know pretty well how "body shaming" feels like. But no, this guy was just being honest to his girlfriend. I really can't see any kind of "body shaming" in this story. Besides, it started as a private chat where she ASKED for his opinion! You can't ask for someone's opinion and then blame them for telling what they really think!
Load More Replies...I am 190, and 5'4. I will admit that I'm overweight, but I'm not ashamed
I don't think she's fat or chubby, NONE of us do. SHE is the one who believes that and THAT is why she posted photos. And I do NOT believe the story with the boyfriend is real. Whatsoever. The text messages are written out EXACTLY the same. My belief is that she just used reverse psychology on the users of Twitter. She needed to feel good about herself. So, she threw something incredibly negative out there, claiming "SOMEONE ELSE" said it, and had the public shower her with compliments and love. And we all fell for it.
I had something similar with my bf. He used to tell me I was fat and that he was worried I could gain even more weight. At the moment I was really sad and took it as an offense because he was upset about it... but now that I've lost 50lb and feel better than ever I can see that he was really doing it for me as a wake up call.
Ya, let's get rid of the honest person, who wanted to keep you in the real world. Many girls gain weight in the beginning of a relationship and actually need to be reminded that they need to work out a bit and take care of themselves. Boyfriend was not rude or anything. I had this conversation with my boyfriend too, even about his weight and it is normal to remind ourselves to go out a bit of the comfort zone. She did gain weight and she knows it but instead of doing some sports she decided to look for approval online with half naked photos. She has a lond way to go, her behaviour is so childish.
I would be proud if you were my girlfriend. You look amazing and beautiful, never forget that. Hugs from Sweden
You have the same body type as me your gorgeous hun even better th an when you couldn't gain weight xxx He doesn't know what he is missing don't get me wrong my fiancee sometimes voices concerns about my lifestyle but never in a horrible manner like this he just worried about my health and doesn't want me to lose my gym progress so he cares about me this guy is a douchebag I mean a beer gut really?! You are stunning and loads of guys will think so too you go get a dog 🐕 then maybe get a new man xxx 😘
"I don't wanna feel like I have to look a certain way for you". I disagree. The way it's worded seems like you should never be allowed to have an opinion of your partners looks. I think it's your obligation to look as good as you can. If I'm slipping, damn right I need to get my s**t together. I don't get how couples so often get fatter over the years. The longer it's been the more I love her and the more I want to be everything she deserves, which includes looking as good as I can. It's selfish to let yourself go. Not saying this girl has, but this whole pouting about weight gain is getting tiresome overall. We also don't know the backstory, but this girl seems like a f*****g c**t. He is genuinely sorry and has grown as a person but she doesn't give a s**t. He's better off without her.
Would be nicer if you settle with face-to-face stuff. Teens seem to be dependant on social media for answers instead of using the brain that is there to do its purpose: Think, Analyze and Decide. Plus she did asked him... Whatever, no one's gonna date you with that analogy...
Blegh, what a gross guy! So glad she left him. He was probably compairing her to other women in his mind that he knew
For all you guys talking about her need for attention - she's young. That's one of the side-effects of youth - the need for validation and affirmation. We are still like that when we get older, we just get more 'covert' about it. So cut her slack, and good for her for losing the guy.
You are young and you will get over him. I am so glad you are coming to realize your own worth. When we learn to love and accept ourselves for who we are, then the superficial stuff like 5 pds. really means nothing. It's all about how you feel inside that matters. As you go through life you are going to find that there will always be people who judge and critique you but you must ask yourself, who are they to judge you? Do they not have faults of there own? So many put down others to help mask their own insecurities. They are the ones who need to take a good hard look at themselves before judging others.
And it took such publicity to achieve such a basic and obvious answer, the youth of today are relying upon the internet too much. Girl is mighty fine, obviously a beauty for she as with all are unique........Confidence girl and lose the creep boy friend.
20 bucks says she gets back w him.. based on her final posts bout bein sad n alone I've seen that before.. she's practically already thinkin bout it. Prollly gonnA wait till this viral thing blows over so she doesn't get s**t for it but ya .. for sure
Your a cute little pixie doll nobody believes my weight and 120? omg never see that ever.
So this girl will do anything other people tell her? Boyfriend: Loose weight. Internet: Dump him! I don´t think telling the world about her personal problems involving another person and then doing what everybody said is going to help her have self esteem.
When you have been in a bad relationship, and find your self in yet another, you have a hard time trusting your own feelings, because that's what bad relationships do to you - it makes you distrustful of yourself. And it can also screw your idea about yourself up, so you see nothing wrong with posing in underware either! When we trust ourselves and respect ourselves we wouldn't do it if asked, but after bad relationships you do it, because the idiot who "trained" you made you not questioning taking pictures in your underware! So instead of shaming her, understand where she comes from, what she has been through, have som compassion. She needs it, more than you know. When she has found her strength and power again, she wouldn't do it, just because someone asks her to.
WOW. Glad you ditched him. He was wel on his way to becoming some kind of control freak/abuser. I love the meme on FB that comes around every so often: I wish I was as fat right now as when I thought I was fat 20 years ago. That would so be me. I'm 5'7 and big figured, so 145 - 150 is perfect for me. Honey, I would kill for you figure! You just keep doing you, babe. You'll be fine.
That creep should never have had the chance with that girl. She is bona fide cute with her little stomach.
That creep should never have had the chance with such a sweet girl. She is a bona fide little hottie
My father said my life's a s**t and me myself am a total waste of human being because I've gained 20kg. I have a Masters degree, am 28 and have an executive role. This girl can get rid of her boyfriend but I'm stuck with my father.
holy c**p. for reals??? 120 is underweight! if he can only get turned on if a girl is 20 lbs underweight, then he deserves nothing. i wouldnt even be sad. what i would give to be 120, and he thinks thats fat. omygod. what a jerk
More public confessional, lack of inner compass, need for the public lauding her seemingly lack of a sense of personal life. Is it me, or is this s**t getting far too repetitive? I mean, he said a jerky thing. Have the temerity to tell him to buzz off. Why act all "do you think you'll love me less?" coy, then publicly flagellate him in an extremely passive aggressive manner? This is not feminism, this is 1930's coyness and it's a bore.
Basically, the same thing happened to me about two months ago. With a guy, I've been with for three years. With whom I live with. We made it through but reading this still wasn't easy. It's not like he bullied me or anything, he just needed to mention that he noticed that I gained some weight (which I did - about 5 kg/11 pounds in six months) and that he'd like me to get rid of it. He barely noticed most of it went to my butt but was bothered by the part that was around my belly. I went from buying XS to buying S sized clothes. My sadness and lower self-esteem which I've had since then has probably taught him. Or at least he says so and it really looks like it...that he now sees and cares about the important things which this is not. He was really nice afterward, sorry, apologizing, supporting. It's going to be alright, nevertheless, I'm glad there are people talking about this out loud.
A size small is not overweight. You probably look and feel much better now. I wish you could develop a healthy self esteem to go with it. You deserve it.
Load More Replies...Either he likes you for you - or likes you for your body. I recommend finding a guy that likes you for you... The you > that you love....
She could do with a few more pounds on her, and she can lose the beer gut. Lose the boyfriend first as he is just hindering you're best efforts. Let him appreciate a few hand jobs of his own.
This is amazing!! So proud of her!! I had gained 10 lbs since starting my new desk job and I wanted to lose weight, my fiance said it was stupid and I was fine with "a little pooch". I opened up to him that I didn't feel good about myself and instead of tearing me down he's gone the extra mile and has decided to create a workout plan for both of us and to go on a weight lose journey together! The right person will always support you and not drag you down. Hope you find that person soon!!
She is absolutely lovely! Would not change a thing. Except for him. My friends used to tell me ....if we lined up 100 guys in front of you and 99 were well adjusted, had jobs, cars and owned a home, but one was a d**k, unemployed, smelled guess what? You would pick that guy! Some of us are just magnets to really bad dudes. Pay attention to those red flags ladies. Shelby is fine, him, not so much.
(I lose my original comment) I can not find my comment. Shelby is a beautiful woman, she does not need anything to be beautiful. Some people only look for objects, and the problem is that people are not mere objects. I insist that she is very beautiful. She is also a photographer!!! Shelby, do you like 35mm photography? Best regards from the south of the south!!!
I speak from experience that being in a relationship with someone who puts you down psychologically really can make a girl gradually put on weight. It's wonderful that she realized what a jerk he was and stood her ground.
You look fine girl. I haven't seen him but I can tell you I don't need to. Send his a*s to the curb. I promise you he's a loser. Yeah I said it. Bring it little boy. What a piece of trash he is.
People should be judged on their humanity and looks is just one part of that. What is the obsession with how people look, how much they weigh, and why is it okay for a supermodel to pose in lingerie and not for any other women? I think looks are being dramatically overvalued nowadays, but also the wish to present your looks to the world. Let's get back to what really matters.
well the positives are you just lost about 150lbs of ignorant useless t***t that you didn't need anymore. Move on, move up, stay positive.
She's adorable and there isn't a damn thing wrong with her. I'm really glad she realized what a jerk he was before the relationship went on too long. I've been in abusive relationships too, and it took me way too long to figure out how to spot the warning signs (even when they were obvious to everyone else).
She's beautiful. Why are people so horrid? If looks are the only thing he finds attractive, he will never be satisfied.
It wouldn't have been long before this guy would have started slapping her around physically for not listening to him; not just verbally. DON'T take him back. EVER.
Probably because he's not an insecure attention seeking narcissist looking for validation from random strangers on the internet who provide hollow affirmation that she's "SO PERFECT AND BEAUTIFUL!"
Load More Replies...She looks fine to me. I'm more worried with her need for attention...Why does she have to share this with the world!?
she was questioning whether what he was saying was ok or not. Sometimes you need an outside 3rd party to put things into perspective
Load More Replies...She looks fine. What I don't get is why she would publicly post her pictures in lingerie... Especially the second one in the 4-pieces series... I mean, it's not offensive or anything, I guess I just admire her courage, cause I think some things should stay private. And you can show your beer gut or the lack of it in other clothes than those ;)
She's posting them because of the same reason she posted all of it - attention.
Load More Replies...ahhh.....the approval of the anonymous masses is the balm for a fragile self image
She's just desperate for attention and he is absolutely right about her beer gut. He should have dumped her instantly after she posted private messages. He only told her privately about it and she is the one shaming him on the internet. Why should he not tell her about it? Should he wait till he doesn't find her attractive anymore and then tell her?
This is why you need real-life face-to-face friends. You discuss this stuff with them instead of putting everyone's dirty laundry out into the public. She did have a right to ask others if her feelings were rational, but she should have spoken to a close friend or a family member IN PERSON.
Load More Replies...Who take thousands of pictures of himself in the bathrooms or anywhere ? Narcissic people. Instead of looking for attention based in your ugly or beautiful body (anyway), be smart, be interesting. You deserve what is happening. You are narcissic, you are with someone based on apparence. Today, even you are the same, your body change, your narcissic behaviour is against you now. Grow up.
Maybe vain people just like showing off their toilets ;)
Load More Replies...How the hell do so many people feel comfortable to break up a couple and advise her to dump him?!?!? Yes, his attitude towards her figure is wrong and he should appreciate what he has because she looks fine just the way she is, but to assume he is a total a*****e, unfit to be her partner is not right either. People make mistakes and he was honest with her... my point is that based only on that knowledge about their relationship, people shouldn't interfere and break them up!
Also, I now realize the irony of me commenting on this post while my nickname here is a relationship reference of Ross haha
Load More Replies...Attention seeking to be honest, why do people love to live their lives on social media and create drama so they can draw in compliments?
I think body shaming is wrong but I'm not so sure about this, the guy was honest and stated how he felt about her body, yeah he should have just left her if he had a problem but being young he's probably just very ignorant and does not know that you under no circumstances should you ask a woman to lose weight.
Why tho? No one is making a fuss about women who ask men to lose some weight or to build up some muscles. There is also no one making a fuss about men asking a women to gain some weight. But when it comes to asking a women to even just stop gaining weight, everyone is instantly triggered. Why should he just leave her, if he probably loves her, but fears to not find her attractive anymore in the future if she keeps gaining weight?
Load More Replies...I often think these things are just made up for Attention on social media, because everyone seems to want their 15 minutes of Victimhood, but, this seems real. She should have dumped his @ss immediately, before dropping this on the web.
What happend with talking and discussion between people? I guess it is easier to dump someone than talk with them sincerely about things that bother you...
I mean, who feels bad for this girl (if this is even REAL). She's a narcissist who posted private conversations in order to shame her boyfriend using strangers who don't honestly care about her. Its the flavor of the day to value the opinion of avatars and freely give hollow encouraging messages to those you don't genuinely give a s**t about. She's not even fat, she just wants attention and validation.
It's funny how a woman would leave a guy promptly if he lost his high paying job but when a guy is no longer attracted to his girl for putting on weight they find it unacceptable. Men and women are attracted to different things. Some men might not mind extra weight as would some women stick by thier man if something they were initially attracted to them for has now disappeared. I just think it's unfair to judge the guy.
Whenever I've heard of a woman leaving a guy for monetary reasons like that, the story was always told with disapproval and sympathy for the guy. I don't think treating that like an acceptable reason is at all standard for whichever way.
Load More Replies...Scales are misleading, especially when you are already at a healthy weight. Wasn't there an article on here awhile ago showing people who'd exercised to improve their looks and actually gained weight but because of increased muscle tone they looked better. She's at that area - a healthy weight. If it really bothers her then doing some cardio to firm up and increase muscle mass will help, but she may end up weighing 130 once that's done. Muscle is heavier than fat tissue after all. But it must be her decision and no one else's to do that. The only people who need to lose weight are fat asses like me where it's a medical issue.
It's just a feminist article barely disguised to denounce the pseudo-victimization and the terrible suffering of girls against men. This kind of nonsense should not interfere here.
And she ASKED for his opinion! Is this the state of the feminist mindset?! Shower me with hollow validation or you're literally attacking me?!
Load More Replies...Weird, just weird that they have this conversation vias text and get random twitter people involved,. Just weird. This should of been a private conversation face to face.. s**t liek that can excalate via text messages as there note tone to a text. maybe an emogi, but really wtf does that do. Just strange, maybe i should post my toe nail on the internet , my wife says it get too long,,, 'look world ; what's your recommendation for my toenail, because I have such insecurity issues i need to share this s**t with you and have approval from strangers on the other side of the world to reassure my insecurities ' Just weird ...
I think he was inconsiderate but it wasn't a good reason to dump him immediately. I think she is insecure and has a lot of body image issues. They could possibly have worked through this if they were both willing to talk.
Tbh the internet is a judgemental and cancerous place at times and they should have just sorted out this little argument by themselves instead of letting random people decide what she should do with her life... maybe he was a brilliant boyfriend, maybe he was just casually mentioning he'd like her to lose some weight, we don't know the context to this... posting it on the internet was one of the worst moves she could have done in mu opinion, and even if she was going to leave him, probably led to a lot of uninformed and strong opinions.
3.500.000.000.000 people live right now on this planet, and one has a problem with her weight? haha hehe
Frankly, I think she looked best in the second pic...later on, she WAS putting on the pounds...just sayin'.
There's a fundamental piece of this conversation missing. Did HE text her about it or did SHE ask? If she asked I see NOTHING wrong with this. He even says he's attracted to her and she's gaining some weight. 5lbs may seem like a little, but muscle takes up about half the space, so if she's letting her whole body go due to drinking, she may (and does) look like she IS gaining weight. He is sweet and says he's still attracted to her and is just worried if she lets herself go more. He seems concerned, not body shaming. But, once again, I think we all really need to see where this conversation started. I gained about 20lbs (I believe due to my IUD) and I was depressed. I kept whining about and asking my boyfriend and he finally said that if it upset me so much, I should go to the gym more and I have and i'm looking so much better every week. If she asked and she's posting underwear photos everywhere, she can't be mad at a man that's brave enough to be HONEST. Many of us women like that!
don't.post.half-naked.pictures.online. And the guy came to his sense in the end, give him a break too
It does seem insensitive of the boyfriend ,but am I the only one who thought he was trying to tell her she's putting on weight out of concern? From the pictures , she is gaining quickly and it's all the dangerous belly fat that leads to higher risk of heart disease and all sorts if other problems in women. Considering she had issues with her weight before , bf may have thought he was helping . He even states it doesn't bother him and he's still attracted to her. Could it be just a really bad way of bringing up a personal issue? He seemed so understanding of his actions in the end.
I understand why she did this had the same experience with my Father. Had to fight to keep weight on all my life I only hit over 8 st (112lbs) when I was pregnant. I finally maintained 112lbs for 6 months with out been pregnant and felt amazing. Told my Dad celebrating he'd seen me battle to maintain a healthy weight since I was a teenager his first word to me where " You need to go on a diet you will get fat" that was it his only comment. I cried for hours took all the joy out of my achievement and fight a piece of me ws destroyed that day. The cruelness in his comment made me feel he only wanted a skinny ill looking daughter piece of me died that day. When ever I get on scales I hear his words.
She wasn't with the right guy obviously but why do people ask for an opinion from others and then get offended when an opinion is given? Everyone has a right to say what they feel, especially when asked.
The internet has become a crazy place where people dump their personal problems (with pictures, preferably showing some flesh!) and seek attention. And if somebody looks fine but is steadily gaining weight, it's the partner or a friend to point it out as at some point it leads to obesity and it's not "fine" anymore. Too many people want to cure their insecurities on the internet. If someone is happy with themselves, they do not seek on the internet confirmation they're fine.
To be honest, I think physical attraction is just as important as being attracted to a person's personality. She looks great and definitely not overweight, but if the guy's not attracted to that kind of body type that's fine imo. What's not fine is shaming her into losing weight. Might be best to break up with him and find someone who would appreciate her as she is.
He didn't even shamed her into losing weight. He asked her to stop gaining.
Load More Replies...What is he talking about? You look AMAZING. Not overweight at all, dodged a bullet with that one, girl. I don't even see a beer belly.
well, she does not look AMAZING according to him and he can have his own opinion, don't you think? She asked, he answered. If he does not find her AMAZING, he should have lied about it?
Load More Replies...You asked his opinion- he was honest and gave it to you... Now, he said he still likes you. Some people care a lot about visual apperence- but at least he is honest!
Don't ask a question to a loved one if u can't handle the trueth , my wife said she thought the girl was Prego. Everyone says they want honesty in a relationship yet they cry when they hit with the trueth.ever want to know the trueth so a 5-10 yr old they brutally honest
Body shaming would be trying to make someone ashame of the appearance of his/her body, because of your own standards (which depends on a lot of things like time and place, for example at some point in western Europe chubby women with White skin were considered sexy, today it's usually skinny and tanned). Simple as that. I put health issues aside. You don't tell someone show To dress? Don't tell him/her what his appearence should be. It's very subjective, it can be hurtful, and as I said, is it really what matters more in a relationship? It's very probable that in 20/30 years your opinion on appearance will have changed, just as your body. What you find so important today will have disappeared, but a deep relationship will still be here.
Gah this was supposed to be an answer to roman pintus, I guess I still don't know how to correctly use the comment section 😅😅😅😅
Load More Replies...This dude will be kicking himself for the way he acted. Girl is gorgeous.
A good partner helps you to live healthy and does everything to make you happy! everything else is b******t!!! good partnership starts with healthy and happy life!
People with healthy body think they are overweight. People with serious overweight think they are "healthy". I just can't get it.
It has nothing to do with weight or size. It's their body perception. Unfortunately, people with eating didorders have a distorted body perception.
Load More Replies...i feel for you - i am criticised for being haggard skinny and horrible after losing weight due to illness
I am super skinny and people make annoying jokes about my body. So, I know pretty well how "body shaming" feels like. But no, this guy was just being honest to his girlfriend. I really can't see any kind of "body shaming" in this story. Besides, it started as a private chat where she ASKED for his opinion! You can't ask for someone's opinion and then blame them for telling what they really think!
Load More Replies...I am 190, and 5'4. I will admit that I'm overweight, but I'm not ashamed
I don't think she's fat or chubby, NONE of us do. SHE is the one who believes that and THAT is why she posted photos. And I do NOT believe the story with the boyfriend is real. Whatsoever. The text messages are written out EXACTLY the same. My belief is that she just used reverse psychology on the users of Twitter. She needed to feel good about herself. So, she threw something incredibly negative out there, claiming "SOMEONE ELSE" said it, and had the public shower her with compliments and love. And we all fell for it.
I had something similar with my bf. He used to tell me I was fat and that he was worried I could gain even more weight. At the moment I was really sad and took it as an offense because he was upset about it... but now that I've lost 50lb and feel better than ever I can see that he was really doing it for me as a wake up call.
Ya, let's get rid of the honest person, who wanted to keep you in the real world. Many girls gain weight in the beginning of a relationship and actually need to be reminded that they need to work out a bit and take care of themselves. Boyfriend was not rude or anything. I had this conversation with my boyfriend too, even about his weight and it is normal to remind ourselves to go out a bit of the comfort zone. She did gain weight and she knows it but instead of doing some sports she decided to look for approval online with half naked photos. She has a lond way to go, her behaviour is so childish.
I would be proud if you were my girlfriend. You look amazing and beautiful, never forget that. Hugs from Sweden
You have the same body type as me your gorgeous hun even better th an when you couldn't gain weight xxx He doesn't know what he is missing don't get me wrong my fiancee sometimes voices concerns about my lifestyle but never in a horrible manner like this he just worried about my health and doesn't want me to lose my gym progress so he cares about me this guy is a douchebag I mean a beer gut really?! You are stunning and loads of guys will think so too you go get a dog 🐕 then maybe get a new man xxx 😘
"I don't wanna feel like I have to look a certain way for you". I disagree. The way it's worded seems like you should never be allowed to have an opinion of your partners looks. I think it's your obligation to look as good as you can. If I'm slipping, damn right I need to get my s**t together. I don't get how couples so often get fatter over the years. The longer it's been the more I love her and the more I want to be everything she deserves, which includes looking as good as I can. It's selfish to let yourself go. Not saying this girl has, but this whole pouting about weight gain is getting tiresome overall. We also don't know the backstory, but this girl seems like a f*****g c**t. He is genuinely sorry and has grown as a person but she doesn't give a s**t. He's better off without her.
Would be nicer if you settle with face-to-face stuff. Teens seem to be dependant on social media for answers instead of using the brain that is there to do its purpose: Think, Analyze and Decide. Plus she did asked him... Whatever, no one's gonna date you with that analogy...
Blegh, what a gross guy! So glad she left him. He was probably compairing her to other women in his mind that he knew
For all you guys talking about her need for attention - she's young. That's one of the side-effects of youth - the need for validation and affirmation. We are still like that when we get older, we just get more 'covert' about it. So cut her slack, and good for her for losing the guy.
You are young and you will get over him. I am so glad you are coming to realize your own worth. When we learn to love and accept ourselves for who we are, then the superficial stuff like 5 pds. really means nothing. It's all about how you feel inside that matters. As you go through life you are going to find that there will always be people who judge and critique you but you must ask yourself, who are they to judge you? Do they not have faults of there own? So many put down others to help mask their own insecurities. They are the ones who need to take a good hard look at themselves before judging others.
And it took such publicity to achieve such a basic and obvious answer, the youth of today are relying upon the internet too much. Girl is mighty fine, obviously a beauty for she as with all are unique........Confidence girl and lose the creep boy friend.
20 bucks says she gets back w him.. based on her final posts bout bein sad n alone I've seen that before.. she's practically already thinkin bout it. Prollly gonnA wait till this viral thing blows over so she doesn't get s**t for it but ya .. for sure
Your a cute little pixie doll nobody believes my weight and 120? omg never see that ever.
So this girl will do anything other people tell her? Boyfriend: Loose weight. Internet: Dump him! I don´t think telling the world about her personal problems involving another person and then doing what everybody said is going to help her have self esteem.
When you have been in a bad relationship, and find your self in yet another, you have a hard time trusting your own feelings, because that's what bad relationships do to you - it makes you distrustful of yourself. And it can also screw your idea about yourself up, so you see nothing wrong with posing in underware either! When we trust ourselves and respect ourselves we wouldn't do it if asked, but after bad relationships you do it, because the idiot who "trained" you made you not questioning taking pictures in your underware! So instead of shaming her, understand where she comes from, what she has been through, have som compassion. She needs it, more than you know. When she has found her strength and power again, she wouldn't do it, just because someone asks her to.
WOW. Glad you ditched him. He was wel on his way to becoming some kind of control freak/abuser. I love the meme on FB that comes around every so often: I wish I was as fat right now as when I thought I was fat 20 years ago. That would so be me. I'm 5'7 and big figured, so 145 - 150 is perfect for me. Honey, I would kill for you figure! You just keep doing you, babe. You'll be fine.
That creep should never have had the chance with that girl. She is bona fide cute with her little stomach.
That creep should never have had the chance with such a sweet girl. She is a bona fide little hottie
My father said my life's a s**t and me myself am a total waste of human being because I've gained 20kg. I have a Masters degree, am 28 and have an executive role. This girl can get rid of her boyfriend but I'm stuck with my father.
holy c**p. for reals??? 120 is underweight! if he can only get turned on if a girl is 20 lbs underweight, then he deserves nothing. i wouldnt even be sad. what i would give to be 120, and he thinks thats fat. omygod. what a jerk
More public confessional, lack of inner compass, need for the public lauding her seemingly lack of a sense of personal life. Is it me, or is this s**t getting far too repetitive? I mean, he said a jerky thing. Have the temerity to tell him to buzz off. Why act all "do you think you'll love me less?" coy, then publicly flagellate him in an extremely passive aggressive manner? This is not feminism, this is 1930's coyness and it's a bore.
Basically, the same thing happened to me about two months ago. With a guy, I've been with for three years. With whom I live with. We made it through but reading this still wasn't easy. It's not like he bullied me or anything, he just needed to mention that he noticed that I gained some weight (which I did - about 5 kg/11 pounds in six months) and that he'd like me to get rid of it. He barely noticed most of it went to my butt but was bothered by the part that was around my belly. I went from buying XS to buying S sized clothes. My sadness and lower self-esteem which I've had since then has probably taught him. Or at least he says so and it really looks like it...that he now sees and cares about the important things which this is not. He was really nice afterward, sorry, apologizing, supporting. It's going to be alright, nevertheless, I'm glad there are people talking about this out loud.
A size small is not overweight. You probably look and feel much better now. I wish you could develop a healthy self esteem to go with it. You deserve it.
Load More Replies...Either he likes you for you - or likes you for your body. I recommend finding a guy that likes you for you... The you > that you love....
She could do with a few more pounds on her, and she can lose the beer gut. Lose the boyfriend first as he is just hindering you're best efforts. Let him appreciate a few hand jobs of his own.
This is amazing!! So proud of her!! I had gained 10 lbs since starting my new desk job and I wanted to lose weight, my fiance said it was stupid and I was fine with "a little pooch". I opened up to him that I didn't feel good about myself and instead of tearing me down he's gone the extra mile and has decided to create a workout plan for both of us and to go on a weight lose journey together! The right person will always support you and not drag you down. Hope you find that person soon!!
She is absolutely lovely! Would not change a thing. Except for him. My friends used to tell me ....if we lined up 100 guys in front of you and 99 were well adjusted, had jobs, cars and owned a home, but one was a d**k, unemployed, smelled guess what? You would pick that guy! Some of us are just magnets to really bad dudes. Pay attention to those red flags ladies. Shelby is fine, him, not so much.
(I lose my original comment) I can not find my comment. Shelby is a beautiful woman, she does not need anything to be beautiful. Some people only look for objects, and the problem is that people are not mere objects. I insist that she is very beautiful. She is also a photographer!!! Shelby, do you like 35mm photography? Best regards from the south of the south!!!
I speak from experience that being in a relationship with someone who puts you down psychologically really can make a girl gradually put on weight. It's wonderful that she realized what a jerk he was and stood her ground.
You look fine girl. I haven't seen him but I can tell you I don't need to. Send his a*s to the curb. I promise you he's a loser. Yeah I said it. Bring it little boy. What a piece of trash he is.
People should be judged on their humanity and looks is just one part of that. What is the obsession with how people look, how much they weigh, and why is it okay for a supermodel to pose in lingerie and not for any other women? I think looks are being dramatically overvalued nowadays, but also the wish to present your looks to the world. Let's get back to what really matters.
well the positives are you just lost about 150lbs of ignorant useless t***t that you didn't need anymore. Move on, move up, stay positive.
She's adorable and there isn't a damn thing wrong with her. I'm really glad she realized what a jerk he was before the relationship went on too long. I've been in abusive relationships too, and it took me way too long to figure out how to spot the warning signs (even when they were obvious to everyone else).
She's beautiful. Why are people so horrid? If looks are the only thing he finds attractive, he will never be satisfied.
It wouldn't have been long before this guy would have started slapping her around physically for not listening to him; not just verbally. DON'T take him back. EVER.
Probably because he's not an insecure attention seeking narcissist looking for validation from random strangers on the internet who provide hollow affirmation that she's "SO PERFECT AND BEAUTIFUL!"
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