Drama Ensues After Daycare Teacher Refuses To Change Diaper Of Germaphobe Mom’s Kid
A story from a 20-year-old woman and a preschool daycare worker went viral in the AITA community, sparking a debate about entitled parents and many things in between.
“The other day I was at a huge barbecue with some friends from high school and the friends of their parents were also there,” the woman, who goes by the handle Commercial_Object941, wrote. She ran into one of her preschoolers and her mom, who, after a few minutes, said that her kid’s diaper was dirty and asked if the author could change it. At first, the author thought it was a joke.
But then the lady made it very clear she was being dead serious. “No, really, I don’t change diapers,” the mother of the baby insisted and even had some arguments on why prepared up her sleeve.
Read on for this rather unusual incident right below and be sure to share your thoughts in the comments.
A 20-year-old woman and daycare worker ran into an entitled mom while out at a barbeque, where the lady asked her to change her baby’s diaper
Image credits: LinkedIn Sales Solutions (not the actual image)
Image credits: RODNAE Productions (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Commercial_Object941
According to Marissa McKenna, a mom to four children who runs a parenting blog called Mommy Knows What’s Best, an experienced parent would know what to expect when it comes to changing diapers in public. However, for a new parent, the first public diaper change could be a daunting task. “It’s all about being prepared when you bring your baby out in public places,” she told us in a previous interview.
McKenna argues that when you need to change a diaper in public, there are a few extra things to think about that you wouldn’t worry about at home. She reminds parents to consider these things: “Is there a safe space to lay down the baby? Is the space clean enough for the baby? Is it a blowout that may require extra supplies or help? If you cloth diaper, are you prepared to store the soiled diaper in your bag until you get home? Who is around that may be watching? If you have another child with you, who’s going to keep an eye on that child so you can manage the diaper change?”
“To us adults, going to the bathroom is a private event, unless of course you’re a mom with little kids. We don’t want to see or smell other people’s waste, especially when we’re eating or drinking. And if you’re someone with a weak stomach, it can ruin your day,” McKenna explained.
She continued: “I think any backlash comes when a parent tries to change a baby’s diaper on a surface or in a place that is used by the general public to eat or drink or even sit. No matter how tiny the baby is, it just isn’t right.”
Many people expressed their support for the author in the comments
After getting a lot of feedback, the author came back with an update
"Hi. Well, as you know, my daughter is graduating and off for college. You were her favorite teacher, so will you pay for her tuition? My husband usually does this, but he is playing golf and I don't want to bother him. I would do it myself, but I have spendaphobia, and I just can't. I hope you are empathetic enough to agree to this."
... you changed the actual meaning, but still maintained what it means... Yeah, totally. I have spendaphobia myself, and people always act as if I was a criminal or something, just because in the buying process, I skip the paying due to getting panic attacks by the mere thought about my balance sheet. They, out of sheer cruelty, deny me the entire buying-stuff-experience just because I cannot spend. Have they even thought about their antics for a second?
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That mother is going to have fun for the next few years. Kids do plenty of things that are gross and germ filled. Changing diapers is pretty low on the list imo for that. Wait till the kid gets poop on their hands (and then their face, and the walls) while toilet training, has a cold and has a runny nose, throws up after eating, mashes up its food into a weird combination and smears it everywhere, tries to lick her face (kids do that), falls in the dirt and starts bleeding, gets dog slobber on its face from meeting a friendly dog, etc. There's so many small and different things that can be germy and vomit inducing.
Seriously. I only had one child, but in the course of her infancy and toddlerhood, I was peed on, pooped on, vomited on, snotted on, etc.
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I think that if she isn't prepared to change her child's nappy she probably shouldn't have children.
I have that phobia, and work on it with a doctor. I would say she work on her issue with a professional if she really has that, because that is stopping her from daily activities.
This is the correct way to act, if recognize you have a problem you work on that as much as you can, thanks for sharing more people should feel safe to ask for help even with things most people don't understand
Load More Replies... But she's not grossed out by her child sitting in a pile of germs. Interesting.
Interesting indeed. I have a fear of spiders but when one crawled on my baby in the pram I grabbed it with my bare hand and thew it to the side. If something scary is on your child you remove it (regardless of it being a justified fear or not).
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Did this mom not know that diaper changes were going to be a part of having a child? I don't have children and I know this. Not only did this woman sound entitled, she sounded insane. It's a good thing that this little girl has her nanny and her dad. Otherwise, her diaper would never get changed.
I can understand having issues and how hard that must be. But, especially when you become a parent, this is on you to work on. Yes, it's crazy hard to HAVE to tackle your own demons but it's what it's expected of you. Go to therapy, get help - take responsibility for your issues. (Same if you have a hard time dealing with emotions or communicate your own feelings or needs etc (you will have to do handle these things a lot as a parent too)). I feel bad for the kid if she isn't up for going through hard times to make the future better.
My friend is a germaphobe and he's decided he's never going to have kids for this reason!
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I'm not saying people with phobias shouldn't have children, but germophobia and emetiphobia is a terrible combo if you want to be a parent, and being prepared to deal with it is your responsibility
Not just a parent but the fear being sick didnt stop her from getting pregnant. Morning sickness (dont know why its called that as mine was terrible in the evenings) can be awful, I assume she got over that ok, so should get over this
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If she cannot care for her first child she definitely should abstain from a second. It is 100% her responsibility as a parent to change the diaper. What a sense of entitlement having the gall in asking you outside of your employment to do the deed as if you were her servant. I think she may have been showing off in front of her friends trying to show that she can flex at some random gathering. And if those were real friends she was with at the event why didn't one of them step up and handle it? I would run from her if I was the husband.
I wouldn't change a diaper for anyone, for any reason. Her real friends can refuse her ridiculous request and still be real friends. SHE is not a "real" friend if she expects her pals to change her own kid's dirty diapers. Yuck!!!
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I'm presuming the mother was a germophobe before having kids. If she also had emetaphobia before the baby was born, I wonder how she dealt with morning sickness. You've got to wonder if she tried to tackle it by way of therapy, or if she's just stuck with the I can't do it someone has to do it instead mentality. I'm not surprised all the friends kept quiet, hoping they wouldn't accidentally put them forward for duty changing the dirty nappy, but I am surprised it got to the point of the mother loading the child into the car still in that nasty nappy. The mother needs to try therapy or hypnotherapy to get over, or at least learn better to deal with, her issues since she's got years of the kid getting messy and kid being sick to deal with, and if her way of dealing is to try to offload responsibility onto anyone else, it could damage the parent/child relationship and might be the kid needing therapy.
If the woman is rich and has a nanny, hire someone to come with you whose sole responsibility will be to change the child's diapers and clean the child up. That's how it was done for rich people in the olden days....why not now.
When you're a parent you have to suck up any icks and phobias you have. I was very sensitive to vomit, the smell and sound of people being sick would promptly result in me sympathy heaving. My two year old once had Exorcist level puking in bed and when I picked her up she puked on my face, I puked on hers and both of us took a very prompt and teary shower from which I had to scoop up chunks from the plughole later. I am just as sensitive to puke but i just have to get on with it.
I suppose it’s easier to assume the nearest peasant will handle your duties for you. It sounds cruel but I can’t make anything else out of the stunt this lady pulled.
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If you can't stand germs, kids are the last thing you want in your life (and house). Seriously, they're walking petri dishes.
Lol that mother is entitled as hell. If she would have asked in a different way instead of demanding it it would of been a different result but clearly she’s used to servants and is confused about work hours. She should of just sucked it up and done it and got herself a vomit bucket if that’s what it was at the first no she got. She just kind of seems ridiculous and entitled and probably that’s the first no she heard in a long a*s time that it no doubt shocked her which is why she kept asking you. I also want to add that just because you have a fear/issue of something doesn’t mean you cant over come it.
There isn't any manner of asking that would be acceptable. It's a disgusting and inappropriate request.
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a hard pill to swallow: you absolutely must put aside your germophobia/emetophobia when you have children, because guess what? children get messy, they throw up, they get into all sorts of gross things. and you as a parent TO YOUR OWN CHILD have GOT to toughen up and a c t u a l l y t a k e c a r e o f y o u r k i d s!!!
I went to a childminder as a kid, both my sister and I were there from when we were babies until age 12 ish so she and her family basically like family to us. She once told us she was invited to another kids' parents party and accepted, assuming it to be as a friend, when she arrived they pointed her in the direction of a room full of kids, they invited her as a free baby sitter. People's entitlement rarely surprises me!
NTA, you're not at work, and her kids are not your problem. Why did she had kids if she's germaphobe? Kids do gross things on a daily basis.
I also don’t change diapers…but, that’s one of the reasons I won’t have kids. NTA…not OP‘s problem!
So the entitled mom is a germaphobe and has a fear of throwing up... but she decided to have kids and got pregnant?? People usually pick lifestyles that support their medical issues. I wonder why she didn't and is instead neglecting her own child. NTA, OP!
The thing I just can't understand is how is this mom not doing anything about it? I mean, if I wasn't able to change my own child I'd be devastated and would immediately seek help to be able to control myself enough to get it done, no because I can't ask for other people's help but because it is such an important part of parenting and would know I am missing out on something. I mean, what is she going to do with potty training? It's another important thing in my child's life i would be missing out on!
Why would a germaphobe think it's a good idea to have a kid? Kids are so gross, she's in for a ride.
I feel like if the mom is going somewhere with the daughter and not her husband she needs to ask the nanny if she's available to come and just pay her whatever extra/overtime is warranted to make sure someone is there who can change the baby's diaper without constantly asking her family and friends for favors. I don't think people with medical issues shouldn't have children. But it's not an excuse to be entitled and they should factor in for a case like this they they'll need to make extra effort to ensure the baby is always well taken care of.
I can be empathetic as someone who's afraid of throwing up. I'm not very gag sensitive at all but poop is one of few things that make me want to vomit. But then don't have kids, the process itself is disgusting enough with blood and stuff.
I have a super germaphobic aunt and let me tell you this is exactly what it’s like. Nobody wants to hang out with her because she taught her children to scream and cry if any kid (no matter the age) sneezes around them. She wouldn’t share her water with her own kid and made them wait for an hour until they got to a store.
I helped my daughter one summer with VBS, and my daughter asked if I would help with the babies, o I did, there were 3 other women in there with me, and not one of them would change a diaper, their excuse was I can’t stand changing someone else’s kids diaper, so that was my only day there, I felt like they were using me for the dirty work, and no I don’t like changing dirty diapers but I’ll be damned if I let a child marinate, in their own feces.
Daycare staff are not Teachers. Teachers have post-secondary degrees and licenses, which must be renewed and paid for each year.
The mother thinks everyone is her servants. Everyone knows that as a parent(birth or adoption) you are stuck with the filth until the kid(s) get older. So pee, doodoo, spit and boogers are all a part of those duties. The fact that she asked someone on their day off to change a pamper, and then rather than she do it, put the child in the car with a sh**y pamper says she's a huge ah. She was okay with her kid sitting in her own mess. NTA.
Once she disclosed her phobias, mental health struggle, and was vulnerable, I would have assisted. She opened up to you. And was so embarrassed by the interaction sheretreated. It is a diaper for goodness sake. The world is changing for sure.
I have to say that I don’t perceive that’s what happened here at ALL. Why not ask her friends if it was so sensitive? Or another guest? Why hone in on the NOW NOT WORKING teacher and act absolutely shocked when the obvious answer is no? Why press the issue when she got that absolutely obvious no? Nope, that’s was NOT what happened here.
Load More Replies... First things first... you are a mandated reporter. You now have knowledge of a child being neglected. There is a difference between "Service and Servant". When you are at work you provide a service. I also gag and vomit at critical moments but I handle it because I have to. Make the call to CPS. It is your duty.
My wife really had a problem with "brown" diapers. Had to use a gas mask kind of thing to do it, I was pretty much the guy to do the poop-change all the time. So I can totally understand this lady, poopy diapers is not something you automatically accept as smelling like roses when you give birth, but can be a real issue. So ... not sure how accurate the "reenactment" of the conversation is. But if it was the "you do it cuz you're daycare" kind, that is not cool. If lady asked you nicely and explained the situation, then you could have helped. Believe me ... my wife would lay down her life for our kids, but poopy diapers? That's something else :-D
Nah. Don't have kids if you can't handle poop. Sorta comes with the territory. Even if the mom did ask nice, OP is under no obligation. Changing diapers just because she "asked nicely" is insane. Also, your wife sucks.
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While it's not the worst parenting I've ever read - it's heartbreaking that this woman (parent) didn't get some professional help long ago.
A lot of comments run on the grounds that this woman shouldn't have had a child if she suffers with germaphobia and emetophobia. Some of these comments feel abelist. Should people who suffer phobias not have children? What about people with severe disabilities that make it difficult to take care of all the childs needs? Shouldn't we desire a compassionate society, perhaps where there are community services that help disabled people with child-rearing? Similarly can't we have community services that help people with severe phobias of this type? Maybe the solution isn't just don't have children if you suffer from a phobia or disability.
Idk, if the mom had kept pushing it I probably would have just asked to be paid.
I know that phobias can be irrational, but what I would explain is this: 1. Do you have a problem with your own body? Can you clean and wipe yourself? 2. Your child is no different, and it doesn't even actually depend on if they're your biological child or not. That child is a part of you. What you do for them is no different than what you do for yourself.
I understand the moms issue and not having her husband as backup yatta yatta but how does she cope in the world solo with her kid? Just leaves it an waits for someone to do it for her or hubby to be near. So she's used up her 'get out of poo free' cards one friends and family and now is using the Karen card on "I pay you at the school so.. seems like they need to potty train this little one asap and figure out if she gags too wiping her own A*s.
Is it common to call preschool children students? In my mind you're not a student until upper secondary/high school. Not a native speaker, though.
Where I am from, "Preschoolers" are six year olds. So the phrase "older preschoolers with diapers" gives me goosebumps ... and I didn't even mention "students".
Load More Replies... How can people get children without being able to change a child's diaper? Even I can do that, and I never want to have children. Ok, I didn't do it very often, most diapers I changed weren't on a kid, but a girlfriend of my own age (with a broken hand, she couldn't do it herself then, but incontinence won't pause just because you have bone isses interfering with the application of absorbent underwear ... and those pull-ups are just c**p - more expensive, less capacity, more likely to leak and on top, you either gotta undress completely to change, or wear two or more on top of each other and just rip open the innermost when it is full, so these were hardly any option at all), but, essentially, this is the same. Just smaller, and usually, children's diapers only have two tapes, while adult's ones most times have four ... but, you can't seriously have a child and not get yourself together enough to either be able to change a diaper, or arrange that someone is around who can.
Imma say it. Both are freaking jerks. No babie should suffer cause both people are being assholes. Period. I will stand on this hill and die on it. If I was there I would of snatched the baby changed them and call both social services and department of welfare on child's mom and the daycare. Period. This is wrong and cruel to the baby from both parties.
"Hi. Well, as you know, my daughter is graduating and off for college. You were her favorite teacher, so will you pay for her tuition? My husband usually does this, but he is playing golf and I don't want to bother him. I would do it myself, but I have spendaphobia, and I just can't. I hope you are empathetic enough to agree to this."
... you changed the actual meaning, but still maintained what it means... Yeah, totally. I have spendaphobia myself, and people always act as if I was a criminal or something, just because in the buying process, I skip the paying due to getting panic attacks by the mere thought about my balance sheet. They, out of sheer cruelty, deny me the entire buying-stuff-experience just because I cannot spend. Have they even thought about their antics for a second?
Load More Replies... That mother is going to have fun for the next few years. Kids do plenty of things that are gross and germ filled. Changing diapers is pretty low on the list imo for that. Wait till the kid gets poop on their hands (and then their face, and the walls) while toilet training, has a cold and has a runny nose, throws up after eating, mashes up its food into a weird combination and smears it everywhere, tries to lick her face (kids do that), falls in the dirt and starts bleeding, gets dog slobber on its face from meeting a friendly dog, etc. There's so many small and different things that can be germy and vomit inducing.
Seriously. I only had one child, but in the course of her infancy and toddlerhood, I was peed on, pooped on, vomited on, snotted on, etc.
Load More Replies... I think that if she isn't prepared to change her child's nappy she probably shouldn't have children.
I have that phobia, and work on it with a doctor. I would say she work on her issue with a professional if she really has that, because that is stopping her from daily activities.
This is the correct way to act, if recognize you have a problem you work on that as much as you can, thanks for sharing more people should feel safe to ask for help even with things most people don't understand
Load More Replies... But she's not grossed out by her child sitting in a pile of germs. Interesting.
Interesting indeed. I have a fear of spiders but when one crawled on my baby in the pram I grabbed it with my bare hand and thew it to the side. If something scary is on your child you remove it (regardless of it being a justified fear or not).
Load More Replies... Did this mom not know that diaper changes were going to be a part of having a child? I don't have children and I know this. Not only did this woman sound entitled, she sounded insane. It's a good thing that this little girl has her nanny and her dad. Otherwise, her diaper would never get changed.
I can understand having issues and how hard that must be. But, especially when you become a parent, this is on you to work on. Yes, it's crazy hard to HAVE to tackle your own demons but it's what it's expected of you. Go to therapy, get help - take responsibility for your issues. (Same if you have a hard time dealing with emotions or communicate your own feelings or needs etc (you will have to do handle these things a lot as a parent too)). I feel bad for the kid if she isn't up for going through hard times to make the future better.
My friend is a germaphobe and he's decided he's never going to have kids for this reason!
Load More Replies... I'm not saying people with phobias shouldn't have children, but germophobia and emetiphobia is a terrible combo if you want to be a parent, and being prepared to deal with it is your responsibility
Not just a parent but the fear being sick didnt stop her from getting pregnant. Morning sickness (dont know why its called that as mine was terrible in the evenings) can be awful, I assume she got over that ok, so should get over this
Load More Replies... If she cannot care for her first child she definitely should abstain from a second. It is 100% her responsibility as a parent to change the diaper. What a sense of entitlement having the gall in asking you outside of your employment to do the deed as if you were her servant. I think she may have been showing off in front of her friends trying to show that she can flex at some random gathering. And if those were real friends she was with at the event why didn't one of them step up and handle it? I would run from her if I was the husband.
I wouldn't change a diaper for anyone, for any reason. Her real friends can refuse her ridiculous request and still be real friends. SHE is not a "real" friend if she expects her pals to change her own kid's dirty diapers. Yuck!!!
Load More Replies... I'm presuming the mother was a germophobe before having kids. If she also had emetaphobia before the baby was born, I wonder how she dealt with morning sickness. You've got to wonder if she tried to tackle it by way of therapy, or if she's just stuck with the I can't do it someone has to do it instead mentality. I'm not surprised all the friends kept quiet, hoping they wouldn't accidentally put them forward for duty changing the dirty nappy, but I am surprised it got to the point of the mother loading the child into the car still in that nasty nappy. The mother needs to try therapy or hypnotherapy to get over, or at least learn better to deal with, her issues since she's got years of the kid getting messy and kid being sick to deal with, and if her way of dealing is to try to offload responsibility onto anyone else, it could damage the parent/child relationship and might be the kid needing therapy.
If the woman is rich and has a nanny, hire someone to come with you whose sole responsibility will be to change the child's diapers and clean the child up. That's how it was done for rich people in the olden days....why not now.
When you're a parent you have to suck up any icks and phobias you have. I was very sensitive to vomit, the smell and sound of people being sick would promptly result in me sympathy heaving. My two year old once had Exorcist level puking in bed and when I picked her up she puked on my face, I puked on hers and both of us took a very prompt and teary shower from which I had to scoop up chunks from the plughole later. I am just as sensitive to puke but i just have to get on with it.
I suppose it’s easier to assume the nearest peasant will handle your duties for you. It sounds cruel but I can’t make anything else out of the stunt this lady pulled.
Load More Replies... If you can't stand germs, kids are the last thing you want in your life (and house). Seriously, they're walking petri dishes.
Lol that mother is entitled as hell. If she would have asked in a different way instead of demanding it it would of been a different result but clearly she’s used to servants and is confused about work hours. She should of just sucked it up and done it and got herself a vomit bucket if that’s what it was at the first no she got. She just kind of seems ridiculous and entitled and probably that’s the first no she heard in a long a*s time that it no doubt shocked her which is why she kept asking you. I also want to add that just because you have a fear/issue of something doesn’t mean you cant over come it.
There isn't any manner of asking that would be acceptable. It's a disgusting and inappropriate request.
Load More Replies... a hard pill to swallow: you absolutely must put aside your germophobia/emetophobia when you have children, because guess what? children get messy, they throw up, they get into all sorts of gross things. and you as a parent TO YOUR OWN CHILD have GOT to toughen up and a c t u a l l y t a k e c a r e o f y o u r k i d s!!!
I went to a childminder as a kid, both my sister and I were there from when we were babies until age 12 ish so she and her family basically like family to us. She once told us she was invited to another kids' parents party and accepted, assuming it to be as a friend, when she arrived they pointed her in the direction of a room full of kids, they invited her as a free baby sitter. People's entitlement rarely surprises me!
NTA, you're not at work, and her kids are not your problem. Why did she had kids if she's germaphobe? Kids do gross things on a daily basis.
I also don’t change diapers…but, that’s one of the reasons I won’t have kids. NTA…not OP‘s problem!
So the entitled mom is a germaphobe and has a fear of throwing up... but she decided to have kids and got pregnant?? People usually pick lifestyles that support their medical issues. I wonder why she didn't and is instead neglecting her own child. NTA, OP!
The thing I just can't understand is how is this mom not doing anything about it? I mean, if I wasn't able to change my own child I'd be devastated and would immediately seek help to be able to control myself enough to get it done, no because I can't ask for other people's help but because it is such an important part of parenting and would know I am missing out on something. I mean, what is she going to do with potty training? It's another important thing in my child's life i would be missing out on!
Why would a germaphobe think it's a good idea to have a kid? Kids are so gross, she's in for a ride.
I feel like if the mom is going somewhere with the daughter and not her husband she needs to ask the nanny if she's available to come and just pay her whatever extra/overtime is warranted to make sure someone is there who can change the baby's diaper without constantly asking her family and friends for favors. I don't think people with medical issues shouldn't have children. But it's not an excuse to be entitled and they should factor in for a case like this they they'll need to make extra effort to ensure the baby is always well taken care of.
I can be empathetic as someone who's afraid of throwing up. I'm not very gag sensitive at all but poop is one of few things that make me want to vomit. But then don't have kids, the process itself is disgusting enough with blood and stuff.
I have a super germaphobic aunt and let me tell you this is exactly what it’s like. Nobody wants to hang out with her because she taught her children to scream and cry if any kid (no matter the age) sneezes around them. She wouldn’t share her water with her own kid and made them wait for an hour until they got to a store.
I helped my daughter one summer with VBS, and my daughter asked if I would help with the babies, o I did, there were 3 other women in there with me, and not one of them would change a diaper, their excuse was I can’t stand changing someone else’s kids diaper, so that was my only day there, I felt like they were using me for the dirty work, and no I don’t like changing dirty diapers but I’ll be damned if I let a child marinate, in their own feces.
Daycare staff are not Teachers. Teachers have post-secondary degrees and licenses, which must be renewed and paid for each year.
The mother thinks everyone is her servants. Everyone knows that as a parent(birth or adoption) you are stuck with the filth until the kid(s) get older. So pee, doodoo, spit and boogers are all a part of those duties. The fact that she asked someone on their day off to change a pamper, and then rather than she do it, put the child in the car with a sh**y pamper says she's a huge ah. She was okay with her kid sitting in her own mess. NTA.
Once she disclosed her phobias, mental health struggle, and was vulnerable, I would have assisted. She opened up to you. And was so embarrassed by the interaction sheretreated. It is a diaper for goodness sake. The world is changing for sure.
I have to say that I don’t perceive that’s what happened here at ALL. Why not ask her friends if it was so sensitive? Or another guest? Why hone in on the NOW NOT WORKING teacher and act absolutely shocked when the obvious answer is no? Why press the issue when she got that absolutely obvious no? Nope, that’s was NOT what happened here.
Load More Replies... First things first... you are a mandated reporter. You now have knowledge of a child being neglected. There is a difference between "Service and Servant". When you are at work you provide a service. I also gag and vomit at critical moments but I handle it because I have to. Make the call to CPS. It is your duty.
My wife really had a problem with "brown" diapers. Had to use a gas mask kind of thing to do it, I was pretty much the guy to do the poop-change all the time. So I can totally understand this lady, poopy diapers is not something you automatically accept as smelling like roses when you give birth, but can be a real issue. So ... not sure how accurate the "reenactment" of the conversation is. But if it was the "you do it cuz you're daycare" kind, that is not cool. If lady asked you nicely and explained the situation, then you could have helped. Believe me ... my wife would lay down her life for our kids, but poopy diapers? That's something else :-D
Nah. Don't have kids if you can't handle poop. Sorta comes with the territory. Even if the mom did ask nice, OP is under no obligation. Changing diapers just because she "asked nicely" is insane. Also, your wife sucks.
Load More Replies... While it's not the worst parenting I've ever read - it's heartbreaking that this woman (parent) didn't get some professional help long ago.
A lot of comments run on the grounds that this woman shouldn't have had a child if she suffers with germaphobia and emetophobia. Some of these comments feel abelist. Should people who suffer phobias not have children? What about people with severe disabilities that make it difficult to take care of all the childs needs? Shouldn't we desire a compassionate society, perhaps where there are community services that help disabled people with child-rearing? Similarly can't we have community services that help people with severe phobias of this type? Maybe the solution isn't just don't have children if you suffer from a phobia or disability.
Idk, if the mom had kept pushing it I probably would have just asked to be paid.
I know that phobias can be irrational, but what I would explain is this: 1. Do you have a problem with your own body? Can you clean and wipe yourself? 2. Your child is no different, and it doesn't even actually depend on if they're your biological child or not. That child is a part of you. What you do for them is no different than what you do for yourself.
I understand the moms issue and not having her husband as backup yatta yatta but how does she cope in the world solo with her kid? Just leaves it an waits for someone to do it for her or hubby to be near. So she's used up her 'get out of poo free' cards one friends and family and now is using the Karen card on "I pay you at the school so.. seems like they need to potty train this little one asap and figure out if she gags too wiping her own A*s.
Is it common to call preschool children students? In my mind you're not a student until upper secondary/high school. Not a native speaker, though.
Where I am from, "Preschoolers" are six year olds. So the phrase "older preschoolers with diapers" gives me goosebumps ... and I didn't even mention "students".
Load More Replies... How can people get children without being able to change a child's diaper? Even I can do that, and I never want to have children. Ok, I didn't do it very often, most diapers I changed weren't on a kid, but a girlfriend of my own age (with a broken hand, she couldn't do it herself then, but incontinence won't pause just because you have bone isses interfering with the application of absorbent underwear ... and those pull-ups are just c**p - more expensive, less capacity, more likely to leak and on top, you either gotta undress completely to change, or wear two or more on top of each other and just rip open the innermost when it is full, so these were hardly any option at all), but, essentially, this is the same. Just smaller, and usually, children's diapers only have two tapes, while adult's ones most times have four ... but, you can't seriously have a child and not get yourself together enough to either be able to change a diaper, or arrange that someone is around who can.
Imma say it. Both are freaking jerks. No babie should suffer cause both people are being assholes. Period. I will stand on this hill and die on it. If I was there I would of snatched the baby changed them and call both social services and department of welfare on child's mom and the daycare. Period. This is wrong and cruel to the baby from both parties.
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